"Jock byKenSkuba Ever since OPEC and the oil companies started creating shortages everything has blown way out of proportion. Prices have shot up not only at the pumps but everywhere else too. Many states adopted the odd even system and the infamous $5 minimum gasoline sale. That $5 minimum rule was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Ever since Thornburgh said you couldn’t buy less than $5 worth of gas, companies all oyer Pennsylvania started creating shortages of everything imaginable. As soon as Thornburgh imposed the rule in Pa., Lester B. Farnsworth, President of International Jockstrap Corp. came out with a company rule that stated people couldn’t buy just one package of jockstraps, they had to buy five. I asked Mr. Farnsworth why he did this. “Mr. Farnsworth, why must a consumer buy not one package of jockstraps but five When one package would probably suffice?” “Well you see, our country is in the middle of a terrible crisis.” “Gasoline?” I asked. “No, jockstraps. The situation is reaching critical proportions. There have been reports of people waiting in long lines at the department stores to buy jockstraps and there just aren’t enough to go around.” “Well why must a person buy five packages? That would seem to make the problem worse.” “No not really,” Mr. Farnsworth continued. “You see, people have been going to the stores and only buying one package at a time when they have 10 or 12 unused packages sitting at home. They keep ‘topping their jocks’, excuse the expression, in case there are none left at all. So, by imposing a five-package minimum, we have hoped to shorten the lines by discouraging ‘jock topping’, and we have also hoped to prevent a lot of trouble.” “Trouble?” I asked puzzledly, “What kind of trouble could one have while purchasing jockstraps?” “You’d be surprised. Why at one store there was a case in which an old woman and an All- State basketball player got into a Dr. Miller, Students On Thursday, October 18, sutdents from both of Dr. Miller’s International Understanding Classes went to the United Nations complex in lower Manhattan. Approximately 37 students, Dr. Miller, and Mr. Andrew Kafka, a retired Speech Communications and English professor from Highacres, along with Mrs. Ruth Cody Leib, another guest of the group, filled a 40 seat bus and took off for the “Big Apple”. The group arrived at the U.N. at 10:30 a.m., and were taken on a guided tour which began at 10:45. The tour included a short stroll through the Legal Committee of the General Assembly and the General Assembly while the panels were in session, but the lines were kept moving so as not to disturb the Assemblies. Lunch the 4pur, and students Were' free -to-dine- -on* *U«N.» Topping" fight when both of them went for the last package of jockstraps on the shelf.” “An old woman! What would she want with jockstraps?” I asked. “It seems she uses them as catapults to ward off attackers. She puts baseballs in the pouch and snaps it back at her assailant.” “Very interesting,” I commented, “has she had to use it yet?” “Only once. The All-Stater is out for the season.” SUB PLANS ACTIVITIES The Student Union Board has many activities in store for the next few months. They will be advertised around campus. The activities include anything from a Christmas Party for needy children and Las Vegas Night to Coffeehouses. The Bob Doyle Coffeehouse on October 15 was a great success. Bob Doyle along with fiddler, Tad Marks, put on an entertaining and unique performance which got the audience moving. People responded with clapping, cheering, and dancing. Bob Doyle’s music consists of folk songs, ballads, and bluegrass. For those of you who missed the performance, he will be returning in March to play for the St. Patrick’s Day coffeehouse. On October 24 there was a Blood Mobile in the Residence Hall and the Halloween Dance was held on October 31 in the dining hall. Both of which were cosponsored with RHC. SUB’s annual Las Vegas Night was held November 2 in the Commons. Afterwards there was a convoy to University Park for all U-Day. Tentatively, November 26 was the date chosen for a dance. Its purpose is to welcome everyone back for the winter term. Also, a hay ride is being scheduled for sometime in December. New members are always welcome. Meetings are every Wednesday at 6:00 in the Commons. premises or in the city. At 1:45 p.m. the group reassembled and entered Conference Room 7 (Sale de Conference) and met with a representative of the Palestinian Liberation Organization, Mr. Terzi. Mr. Terzi elaborated on the “Question of Palestine”. He summarized the plight of the Palestinian people in a 50 minute history of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. The session was followed by a question and answer period in which students and Dr. Miller drilled the foreign diplomat. Next the group visited the United States Mission to the U.N. directly across the street from the U.N. complex. John Hersh, a representative and spokesman for the U.S. Mission, spoke to the group concerning the meaning and their « » t k < I > *« ( » • M I ) M t M M Condors Are On The Hazleton Campus Condors venture into the 1979-80 basketball season early in November with hopes of matching, and possibly even bettering, last year’s superior season. Last year, the Condors finished at 16-7; a record that was the best in thirty years. The season was highlighted by the Condors winning the first annual Highacres Holiday Basketball Classic and also a big upset victory over Keystone Junior College from La Plume, who were ranked the top junior college basketball team in Pennsylvania. Contributing' greatly to the success of last year’s team was Paul DeAngelo, who has since 1979-1980 Penn State Highacres Basketball Squad. Soccer Champions YEAR 70- 71- 72- 73- 74- 75- 76- 77- 78- Visit U.N. impact on world affairs. He singled out the case of the Palestinian conflict in the Middle East and the future of the negotiating process between Israel and the PLO. The Palestinian issue seemed to fill the atmosphere of the Penn State group the entire day at the U.N. Students observed the Palestinian point of view as told by Mr. Terzi, and they looked at the issue from the American side. Many students and Dr. Miller, however, regretted that they could not hear the Israeli point of view. The discussion at the U.S. Mission ended at 4:15 p.m. and students were free to either sit in on a General Assembly meeting, then in session, or use 3ie remaining time to roam New York’s shops and tourist attractions. by Edward Nyerick transferred to University Park. DeAngelo averaged 23.5 ppg. and broke six all-time scoring records at Hazleton. However, even though DeAngelo is no longer with the team the Condors seem destined for a successful season as early practices have indicated a great deal of quality on the hardcourt. In the past, Highacres basketball teams have characteristically been small and quick. This year, however, it appears that the Hazleton team will be blessed with fine rebounding potential. With four players 6’4” or taller it appears that the Condors will be able to control the boards in most COLLEGE Behrend Behrend Mount Alto Ogontz Ogontz Ogontz Delaware Ogontz Ogontz Frl., Nov. 9 Thu., Nov. 29 Sat., Dec. 1 Mon., Dec. 3 Wed., Dec. 5 Sat., Dec. 8 Mon., Dec. 10 Wed., Dec. 12 Sat., Dec. 15 Wed., Dec. 19 Thu., Dec. 20 Sat., Jan. 5 Wed., Jan. 9 Sat., Jan. 12 Mon., Jan. 14 Wed., Jan. 16 Sat., Jan. 19 Wed., Jan. 23 Sat., Jan. 26 Mon., Jan. 28 Wed., Jan. 30 Sat., Feb. 2 Tue., Feb. 5 Fri., Feb. 8 Sat., Feb. 9 Tue., Feb. 12 Fri., Feb. 15 , Sat. , Feb. 16 THE PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIVERSITY HAZLETON CAMPUS CONDOR BASKETBALL 1979-80 INTERCOLLEGIATE BASKETBALL SCHEDULE Lehigh Community College Red Rock Alumni Williamsport Community College Keystone Jr. College Scranton, P.S.U. Pinebrook Jr. College York, P.S.U. Delaware, P.S.U. Highacres Holiday Classic Highacres Holiday Classic Ogontz, P.S.U. Mont Alto. P.S.U. Schuylkill, P.S.U. Northampton Community College Wilkes-Barre, P.S.U. York, P.S.U. Delaware, P.S.U. Ogontz, P.S.U. Misericordia College Mont Alto, P.S.U. Schuylkill, P.S.U. Pinebrook Jr. College Baptist Bible College Scranton, P.S.U. Luzerne Community College C.C.A.C. Tournament at Schuylkill C.C.A.C. Tournament .at. Schuyjkij!' Highacres Collegian— The Ball gaihes. Three players will be returning from last year’s team. Tony Marsdicamo, 6’3”, started at center last year, averaging 14.7 ppg. This year Tony will be playing forward. Tim Wagner, 6’l”, started at one of the guard positions and averaged 10.9 ppg. Brian Sawaska, 6’4”, was a reserve forward last year and averaged 3.3 ppg. Ten new players will be wearing the green and gold this year. Two sophomores playing their first year of varsity ball for PSU will be Mike Kostic, a 6’2” forward, and Mike Jackson, 6’4” forward. (H) 6:30 (A) 8:00 (H) 8:00 (H) 8:00 (A) 8:00 (H) 2:00 (H) 7:00 (A) 7:30 (H) 2:00 (A) 3:00 (H) 7:00 (A) 1:00 (A) 8:00 (H) 8:00 (H) 2:00 (A) 8:00 (H) 2:00 (A) 9:00 (A) 6:30 (H) 2:00 (A) 7:00 (H) 8:00 (A) 8:00 (A) 8:00
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers