Dan does the Math seminar by Daniel D. Ester Guest Columnist Am I the only person who has been assaulted by the electronic doors at the front entrance to the Reed Union Building? I’m not a vafhpirc and I’m certain my body is emitting heat, but when I walk up to the heal sensor, the doors refuse to open. I pull the right door open, and then suddenly without warning—the left one decides to open and smacks me square in the chest. Perhaps this is some kind of joke. Arc the maintenance people watching via secret camera, laughing each time someone gets knocked to the cold, hard cement? Or is this simply a psychology experiment? The psyche students arc watching, keeping track of how long it takes people to stand to the right when they open the door. Pavlov’s Students. I suppose the door abuse should simply be thought of as preparation for the Penn State Bookstore. That’s the next thing to be seen once you’ve made it through the doors (if you arc still alive). How many people realize that the Penn State Bookstore is actually an alias for Barnes & Noble? This in itself doesn’t matter, but why are the prices 5-10% higher at the Penn §n I l&L. H Immigrants targets of legislation by Adam Levenstein Collegian Staff On Saturday, Oct 12, I had the honor of joining 30,000 people - mostly Latino - in Washington, D.C. to protest government scapegoating and immigrant bashing. So what? Scapegoating has a long history in this country. When a problem arises, a certain group of people is held responsible in erne way or another. Since the beginning of this century, immigrants hayft.tal|Kn the blame on a wide' 1 range "of problems, from the kidnapping of Charles Lindbergh's child to unemployment. According to the Constitution, any child bom in the United States is automatically a citizen and.given all the rights due to him or her. This alone is insufficient; everyone deserves individual rights, including those of health care and education. However, since California's notorious Proposition 187 (which denied health care and education to the children of undocumented immigrants), even constitutional rights are under attack. The vast majority of these immigrants are working members of society; they have jobs (though are often paid much less than their American-born comrades) and they pay taxes. They also participate in OPEN Mon. thru Fri. 9:3oam to spm Sat. 9am to 4pm State bookstore then they arc at Barnes & Noble on upper Peach Street? Is this because they know they can get away with it? It was very traumatic for me when I sold my books back last semester. They nearly laughed me out of the bank when 1 went to deposit the $5 I had received for the 5350 worth of books 1 had purchased in January. I suffered from the same recurring nightmare for nearly two months thereafter. I'm walking down the damp stone staircase to the Barnes & Noble book buy back dungeon. I place my books on the slimy counter, and a person wearing a red leather mask apftears from a flaming pit. She points her pitchfork toward a sign that reads “You Arc About To Sell Your Bodes To Barnes & Noble: Box) Over, Baby!” I wake up in a cold sweat, screaming my lungs out, and I immediately go to confession (and I am a Baptist!). Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest (a chest that has been repeatedly bashed by the pre bookstore doors because 1 don’t learn as well as Pavlov’s dogs), I can get on with the REAL purpose of this column. I’m here to mention a few words about the third of the Mathematics HIULARf, IHWIE&. NEW INSURANCE POLICY FOR YOU,, IT GOITERS DAMAGE FROftYIHITBNKTER RDOWNGt,. strikes and other union-related actions. They are as much a part of the working class as any citizen. There is also the question of legality. Immigrants who do not get permission from the State Department to enter the United States are considered "illegal" by the US government. These are the people usually targeted, at least by the media, as the reason for anti immigrant legislation. However, such laws often arc just as harsh on the "legal" aliens. In fact, recent "antiterrorist" legislation has contained clauses that severely limit the rights of all immigrants. For instance, any immigrant - legal or not •• merely accused of a Selling Quality Preowned items at low cost. THE New Life Center “The thrift store with style!” Seminar Series which was October 10. Yes, I said “mention a few words,” NOT, “review.” My mother always said if you couldn’t say anything nice about someone, then you better not review their seminar! The guest speaker was Dr. Michael DiSanti of NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center. DiSanti holds the adjunct position as Research Associate Professor at the Catholic University of America, Washington D.C. DiSanti has a Ph.D. in Physics which he earned at the University of Arizona at Tucson in 1989. DiSanti’s presentation, “The coming Age of Near-Infrared (1-5 micron) Spectroscopy of Comets,” was a brief over view of the study of comets. DiSanti showed several overheads of comet models which arc used to study and compare various comets. I don’t think DiSanti could have gotten better response, even if he’d hired a few super models to show his comet models! Unfortunately, DiSanti’s show was quite a sleeper. I’m not sure exactly what he was talking about, but I am sure there were a few Physics people in the audience who were thrilled beyond their greatest expectations! It was difficult to stay focused crime can be deported immediately, without a trial or any other form of due process. In the words of Elie Wiesel, renowned fighter for human rights, "No human being is illegal." Everyone, regardless of race, ethnicity, or country of origin, has the right to education and health care; in short, everyone has the right to equal opportunity. This anti-immigrant action is aimed at the working class. The vast majority of immigrants are working people and are grossly underpaid; some are only paid a few dollars an hour for jobs that would earn anyone else twelve dollars. Of course, these people are often paid "under the table" and are subject to joint raids by the Immigration and Naturalization Services and the company owners. The capitalists know that if they can keep the workers divided it is more difficult for them to rise up. "United we stand, divided we fall." Anyone who respects human rights should support the fight for immigrant rights. It is actions such as those of October 12 - when unionists. Latinos, socialists, and other working-class fighters crowded the streets of Washington - - that win battles. As we chanted in front of the Washington Monument, Si Se Puede! It can be done! THRIFTY SHOP S °OVa r rus^ sy/ • • mio because of the tremendous noise created by the drops of drool hitting the floor beneath the vast majority of the sleeping audience. As a redeeming factor, though, DiSanti showed some brilliantly detailed close-ups of comets which were photographed from the NASA spaceship. I will not rate DiSanti’s presentation because I wouldn’t want NASA to become offended and aim the Hubbcll Telescope’s secret laser at my apartment and then solicit funding from Barnes & Noble for testing it! After hearing all this, I am sure you'd rather insert broken pieces of glass into your private regions than attend the next in the series! But please, let’s give the series another chance, shall we? Dr. Bard Ermentrout of the University of Pittsburgh will be speaking on Thursday, October 17, at 3:00 PM in the Reed Lecture Hall. As always free cookies will be served! Please send comments or hate mail to ddelo4@email.psu.edu Editor’s note: All facts and figures arc the author’s own. Therefore if any questions arise please contact Dan to substantiate them. Last week I attended the speech Mrs. Hillary Clinton gave about education. Hearing her speak was an exciting experience. Everything was live, no directors, no cue cards. In the beginning of her speech, she noted that her father played Penn State football. Of course cheers came from the Behrend students. When Mrs. Clinton entered the auditorium, she witnessed a standing ovation. The value of education was the major theme. Hillary Clinton expressed the responsibility that the community has for its children. Once someone makes it out of hardships, it is her responsibility to give back to the community, to ensure the continuos success in the future. Another important issue, Mrs. Clinton raised is to have faith in the government If we all stand around and say the government is corrupt or the government does not do anything, our statements will come true. It is up to the citizens of each state to make sure the local and state governments ate carrying out their proposed plans. Each citizen in this country has a voice that can be heard and used in a positive way. In order to have a MISSION tCU/SWWWUKIP, ftj&UPMGJKTttt wvcmnjjs fcMWWfcRcFNE CflNIPMai j • * • * • . Hillary Clinton’s speech by Joneatra Henry ColUgain Staff 1213 State Street, Erie 454-4421 Thursday, October 17, 1996 The Behrend College Collegian - Page 3 Bruno’s club by Jason Simmons Collegian Staff When you are bored during those long, dreary weekends on campus, and you have no money left, there are alternatives. On Friday and Saturday nights, entertainment is provided at Bruno's Night Club. There are comedians, bands, novelty acts, and DJ’s to make you forget about your troubles for a short while. Unfortunately, last semester has tainted the image of Bruno's Night Club. Money was mismanaged, and as a result, the entertainment was. .. well. . .mostly low budget, and aging acts. Low attendance took precedence upon poor Bruno. This year will bring changes to the night club. lam in charge now. Yes, me. I am chairman of the night club and have been entrusted with over $lO,OOO dollars to make the students happy. . . ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Remember that -$lO,OOO. Perhaps the school docs care about you. Well, as chairman, I have many ideas for next semester's entertainment. This semester has already been booked up by myself and mostly (almost wholely) by last year's Bruno's chair who has metamorphisized into the Student Programming Council president. good government, according to Mrs. Clinton, faith and confidence in the government must return, there are three basic challenges for education that President Clinton is proposing for the 21st century. He plans to establish the opportunity for all Americans who want to go to college to be able to. He is challenging people to accept responsibility for themselves and their community. His last challenge is for parents to become more involved in their child's education. It is not just the government's fault that our children are not succeeding in education. Education starts in the home. It should not be left up to teachers to handle discipline problems. Students should also take more responsibility for their behavior. Everyone is concerned about their own future but no one is thinking about the three year old who is being abused or the second grader who cannot read or the eighteen year old who cannot afford to go to college. If everyone, including the student, teacher, parent, and community and government take an equal responsibility for education, we can have more success stories. I am working on getting a large name band here next semester which is not definite, but possible. If my budget does not bleed dry. Type O Negative might make a visit to campus! The movie guy (Tom Sarsfield) and I will also plan a devious Valentine's event that will be quite fun, if not strange, that might help you get some phone numbers. I have much planning to do for next semester which includes a four day convention (NACA) where I will find most of the entertainment. If you would like to take part in the planning, whether it be suggestions or ideas, fill out a survey at Bruno's this Friday night. You can also attend a SPC meeting in Reed 112 every Monday at 5:15. I hope to resurrect the Bruno's image. I shall bring it up from the abyss of chaos and bring it into our abyss of Behrend. I would like to thank the regulars who come to Bruno's every weekend. I know who you are. . . stalk, stalk, stalk. Anyway, come to Bruno's this weekend. It will have a new look. Comedians will be there on both nights (check for advertisements), and the mozzarella sticks are surprisingly good, however, the burgers remain grade F, circus animal meat, yum- tiger and zebra. V * ' T* Kelly’s last hooray by Mike Coursey Collegian Staff The Buffalo Bills and the Miami dolphins met last Sunday in a grudge match in Orchard Park. I was one of the screaming 80,000 fans in attendance. Jim Kelly had been out for three weeks with a pulled hamstring muscle, but even before that his performance had been less than stellar. The game was dominated by the Dolphins until late in the game when Kelly, already having thrown two interceptions in the windy stadium hit Andre Reed with a 49 yard pass to the 2 yard line. The Buffalo fans had been calling for the second string quarterback, Todd Collins, to replace Kelly. Kelly was 21-32 with 3 interceptions. Down at the 2 yard line with 1:55 left in the game the Bills could have run in the ball for a touchdown. Kelly, instead threw two incomplete passes then on 4th and goal from the ten threw an interception to Terrell Buckley for a 91 yard return and a touchdown and a 21-7 Dolphin win. Many of the fans thought it should have been Kelly’s last game as a Bill starter. My son and I went to Jim Kelly's Football Camp in June and he always seemed like a real class act. There comes a time in every athletes life when you just cannot physically perform like you used to. In an emotional news conference afterwards Kelly took full credit for the loss and hinted that maybe he should be benched. A bright side for me after the game was when I met former Cleveland Brown's star, Bemie Kosar and he autographed my Brown's jacket, which made me a happy man. For the Bills, it could be a long season.
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