fiiB.Forest ...... U publlihed every Wednesday, by J. C. WENK. Office, la Emeaibaugh & Ca'i Bulldln j ILM 8TBEET, TIOXESTA, PA. 100 too 5 00 10 (W 15 00 S0 0U SO 00 Uu Square, one inch, ttiree month. . One Square, one inch, one year .. ... Two Squares, one year.... Quarter Column, one year. Half Column, one year ........ ....... One Column, one vear.. . ......... 100 00 Leeal advertiieoienta ten centt per line each insertion. Marriages and deith notice gratia. All billstoryearly advertisement collected quarterly Temporary advertisement null be paid in advance. Job work cash eo delivery. Terms, 81.00 PetYr. Ko subscriptions reoelved for a shorter period than throe months. ' Correspondence solloltai from all parti of Iba country. No notloa will be taken of anonymous ooininualaulonj. VOL. XXXI. NO." 41. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, JAN. 25, 1899. SI. 00 PER ANNUM. Dewey is a man of business, is well as a Lard fighter. lie Las done well to make a contract (or raising three of the Spanish warships sank id Manila bay and patting them in repair, all for only $500,000. . lie did not forget. A Chicago man died -and left $50,000 to the newsboys of that'city, the interest on the amount to be expended for their benefit for ninety -nine years. lie had once boon a newsboy himself.. . The metrio system is being consid ered by the Daaish Diet, with a view of. substituting it for the confnsing Danish systeio of weights and meas ures. The general opinion is that the metrio system will be adopted and tho law establishing it will at once go into offeot. . A new controversy is added to tho internal agitations of tho vast domains of the Czar. A ukase has been issued by tho Russiau Miuisler of Education, M. Bogolerow, forbidding the wearing of oorsets in any oducutional institu tion. This terrible order is obeye obediently enough by the more veuile girls, but the maidens who, while still pursuing higher studies, consider themselves young ladies, aro raising a chatter of protest. If thoy wish to cramp their waists, they claim the feminine right to do as they pleaBo. .Instead of packing these rebellious young' women off to Siberia,' the "Littlo Father" has caused an eminont soioutia1. to write a learned brochure upon tho evils of tight lacing. But it would seem the part of wisdom to havo auother essay written upou how conducive to beauty aro unbound waists. Once convinced upou that point and the pouting misses of Rus sian semjuaries would give tho patornal Government no more trouble. Commercial life appears to be prov ing more and more attractive to col lege men, if statistics rebently gathered by a Yalo professor are to bo takeu as fairly representative, says Brad street's. The statistics are derived from tho records of the academic de- . partment at Tale, bat they refer to the vocations of about 7500 graduates, , and porhaps it is only fair to regard them in a genoral way as typical. The figures show but little chango in tho proportion of graduates following the law during the century, that pro fession in each scholastic generation enlisting about a third of the' gradu ates. At the beginning of the century the ministry, which in the earliest days of the Yale attraoted a larger proportion of tho graduates, followed the law as a close second. Tho pro portion attracted by the law hn iu the interval suffered little chango, but the ministry is not chosen by nearly so many graduates as formerly, and its former place seems now to be taken by the mercantile vocation, which enlists about one-third of the graduates at present. This vocation, indeed, seems to be growing moro at- t.rativA fn nnivArnif v.Krorl man nnrlai modern conditions, and it may be that iu the near future it will attract even a largor proportion than at present. For many years English manufac turers of cotton fabrics and other tex tiles have achieved an unenviable rep utation from their practice of weight ing their goods by means of chemicals and other adulterants, observes the Dry (roods Eoon smist. It is largely owing to tho prevalence of such methods that the honest-mado Aineri- : can cottons have in China, East Africa and certain other markets, where their merits are known, withstood the assaults of British .manufacturers and merchants. The fraudulent character of mauy of the British goods- having been brought to the attention of the Manchester . Chamber of Commerce has been Tde the subjjf of a special . report bjao of the Committees of that body, which contains somo rathor astonishing revelation. Not only sheetings, but shirtings, flannelettes, Diannets, linings, ticks, etc., having been shown on analysis to be heavily adulterated with the chlorates of zino and magnesium, Epsom salts and other chemicals. In one case a blaukct weighing seven pounds was shown to owe one pound of its weight to such treatment. And iu many instances woolens were found to bo as much adulterated as cottons. Such fabrics, says the committee's report, are dan gerous to health, and this statement is endorsed by physicians. JuBt what is to be done in the matter is not yet known, but it cannot be doubted that the ventilation of such methods will result in either the enforcement of ex isting laws or the enactment of new legislation to cover the case. Iu tho meantime, the American consumer may rejoice that at least the great ma jority of the cotton goods ho buys aro free from similar adulteration. WHEN I WAKE UPJN THE MORNIN'. When I wake up In the roornln', In the laugliln', smllln' raornln', With my soul keyed like a Addle an' my heart keyed like a luto, An' memory-maids eomo trlppln' an' a-gttdln' an' a-slipptn' An' 0 ood In1 all my heart-house with the faint notes of tbelr flutn, Then my lips Jos' long to utter little songs, that kind o' flutter - Bound tbe earthly oage that eoops them an' would fly up In the light, An' to my sonl all yearnin', little llrefly thoughts come buruln' I An' a brlngln' spirit lanterns that would lead it oat of nlgbt When I wake up In tbe mornln'I Wheal wake up in the mornln', in that solemn, slloct mornin'. After long, long years of slumber an' long, long years of sleep, When my spirit's bird bos rested In the heavenly air it breasted An' its golden pinions tested for tbelr flight across the Deep Lord, I know my soul will flutter up to boaven, an' will utter ' In a clearer note the songs it An' those fitful, flory flashes from Will be altars or star-lnconse wuen i wave up in AN UNPREMEDITATED THEFT. BY FRANCES N her front garden under the big wil low sat Mrs. Spread brow. Behind her stowd the trim cot tage, and in the grass, almost at her feet, gamboled Ed dy, hor youngest born, and tho new black and white puppy. From tho gyra- tinns nf 1I1A twn teW MAVWCifUTI " a.ntiLif -J&t&J young creatures on the grass, ' Mrs. Spreadbrow let her eyos wauder dreamily across the bay to the irregular sky line of the big city, whore she knew that Mr. Spread brow was busily engagod iu convert ing bales of cotton into crisp bank notes. Ah, thought she, happily, she had much to be thankful for, the best bus band in the world, a promising fam ily, a charming home on Staton Isl and and but at this juncture her rev erie was broken iu upon by a sound of footsteps oo the gravel walk lead ing from the front gate to tho house. and looking up, sho behold tho com fortable figure of her dear friend, Mrs. Townley, There followed a scene, such as any lady who has been surprised by tho sudden and unexpected ariival of valued friend can readily imagine. In the course- of it Mrs. Townley was conveyed to the parlor of the trim cot tage, 0'8it and "cool off ' before go ing upstairs. .."Take off your bonnet, dear," said her cheery hostess. "I will put your satchel and parcel and things on this chair. O, I have so much to tell you about and scold you for; why haven t you come ilowu before? In the midst of Mrs. Towuley's ex planations as to why she had absented herself, tuOTfr burst through the open rrencn winaow, line tne advent of a whirlwind, the puppy, Sport, in full cry, followed by Eddy. Bound and round the room they cir cled for some moments, and then, obedient to the oft-repeated commands of his mother, the little youth turned aud embraced their visiViv with much heartiness, Tho peace fhat followed these demonstrations was rudely put to night by the click of the front guto, and the cry from Eddy, who was sta tioned at tne winaow, announcing "a lady coming." "Somobody to call. How provok ing!" said Mrs. Spreadbrow, with a pucker of her plaoid brow. "Come, Maria, let's go upstairs before Delia goes to the door. There goes the belli Never mind your things." In an instant the room was cleared of all save the black and white puppy, who shambled about for a moment, then trotted laboriously oat into the garden by the same routohehad come in. "It's a young lady, Mrs. Spread brow, and sho says she wants to see you on business," announced Delia, a moment later, thrusting hor head through the door of the room to which Mrs. Spreadbrow and her frid had rotated. "Dear met what can she want?" The lady's voice expressed as much irritation as that kindly organ could embody. As she entered the parlor, a tall, slim girl, who had been standing nervously in the middle of the room, advanced to meet her, and tho ioy tone and mauner that Mrs. Spread- Jtow had determined to assume to ward the disturber of her seclusion melted quite away as the pretty youiifi creature lifted a pair of sad dark eyes to her face and said in au emltr rassed voice: "Please pardon mo for intruding. I have come to to " "Fray sit down," interrupted Mrs. Spreadbrow, cheerily. "Thank yon," said the girl, and dropping into a chair. "I will not detain you long. I have here a chil dren's history " and from the depths of a roomy satchel bIio pro duced a small book "that Catoham tc Tasam are publishing " Ah! Now Mis. Spreadbrow knew the worst. "But I don't want it," she said, gently. "It won't do any any harm to to look at it." The girl spoke as if trying to repeat a lesson, and with a wistful look in her face. "Yes, it will; because if I let you Bhow it to mo I mity Buy it, and I really don't waut4it." "Nobody does; but you have put your rejection of it very kindly," said the girl, rising to go. Her voice trembled, and the smile she managed to screw her pretty lips into was far from cheerful. Mrs. Spreadbrow was touched. There was something so pathetio about tho voice and manner, and sho was so very yonng and so very prettry. The I herly l-'y laid her hand pa 'the . nying soft'7; only tried to sing below. the pale hope of my ushos, in the glory of Thy glow tue mornin'i John Trotwood Mooro. A. SCHNEIDER. 7S "Let me give you a glass of lemon ado before you set out again in the heat O!" For the littlo book agent had turned away to hide the tears sho could not restrain. "Excuse mc," she murmured. "It's the hot weather, and and not being accustomed to the work. I I began only yesterday, and it's a long trip to and lrom New York." "Sit down," urged Mrs. Spread brow, gently, "and I will go and get lemonade." When she returned the girl had quite recovered and was sitting quietly at tho window smiling at the gambols of tho puppy. Sho apologized for having given way to her emotions, sipped her drink and then rose again to go: "Thank you so much for your kindness," she 'said warmly, "and goodbyl" "Stop," exclaimed Mis. Spread brow, "I've changed my niind about the book, I'll take it." "You really need it?" with a per ceptible brightening of the eyes. "I cau't get on without a history for Eddy. I never thought of Sport's baring destroyed the one he bud." When the necessary negotiations had beeu concluded and tho pretty book agent had departed, Mrs. Spread brow rotumed to her guest with many apologies for her long absence and bubbling over with the pathetio ro manoe she had woven from the ma terials furnished by the youug girl's words and manner. The two ladies talked over this and siiniliar instances, until they were both in a tearful state, and Mrs. Townley, to turu the tide of fooling, proposed going into tho parlor and opening tho nubbly littlo package she had brought, and which she said contained some trifles for the chil dren. This proposition was hailed with joy by Mrs. Spreadbrow. Mrs. Townley was in the net of untying the last string, when sho suddenly be thought her of her black satchel in which it was her custom to carry her purse, aud which had been deposited with her bonnet aud parasol in a chair in tho corner of the room. With the precipitancy invariably displayed by her sex at such jnuctures, she rose and stepped over to get it. The parasol aud bonuct were on the chair, but not the satchal. "Are you sure you didn't take it into the library?" asked Mrs. Spread brow, after the parlor had been searched. "I know i didn't," responded Mrs Townley, with tremulous irritation. "But of courso we can look." The satchel was not in tho library, the only room occupied by the ladies since Mrs. Townley's arrival; nor did it turn up anywhere in the house. which with anxious inconsistency was searched from top to bottom Mrs. Townley had become very pale and Mrs. bpreadbrow trembled with excitement and chagrin. "O, this is dreadful," she said at east. "I I hate to think it possible, but it must have beeu stolen. How much was in the purse?" "A hundred dollars," replied Mrs. Jownley. "I brought it with me for safety. But who who? There has been no one " "The littlo book agent," casped Mrs. Spreadbrow. "Sho is tho only person who bus been in the parlor be side myself sinca you left it. Is it possible can it be that that inno cent-looking O, dear!" But Mrs. Spreadbrow was a woman of action, albeit mild and gentle, and she sprang to her feet fiercely clench ing her small soft fists. "I II follow her!" she criod. ."Do you go one way, Maria; I will go another, and Doha and the children shall go in other directions. O, we will run her down I The little hypocrite!" Iu a few moments the house was empty of occupants, barring the cook, who stood with her elbows on the fenco and watched the departing search party, and the black and white puppy, who, in his foolish way, growled at and worried something under the big willow. With the hot August sua pouring down upon their heads, the pursuers scurried from house to house, while with what Mrs. Spreadbrow termed the little intense cuuning of a thief," the little book agent managed ever to elude them. At last Mrs. Spreadbrow found a maid servant who said she had seen the girl enter the railway station, and that if Mrs. Spreadbrow hurried she could overtake her before tho arrival of the train for St. George. Station- ward the anxious lady rped, hor heart palpitating with hope, fear and indignation, intermixed with a spice of uncertainty. hat should she do if the girl re fused to give up the pun e. Ah, she knew; she would get on the tram, find a policeman at St. George, and in tercept her as she stepped on the boat. She reached the station just in timo to see the book agent's skirt , whisk through the door of aforward car; she herself was hauled onto the last car by an obliging brakeman just as the train moved off. Arrived at St. George, Mrs. Spread brow hurriedly accosted a policeman, explained that the young woman in the gray linen dress, carrying the black satchel, had committed a theft, and urged him excitedly to detain her. The officer hesitated a moment, and thon interposing his portly form be tween the young girl and the gang plank, touchod her lightly ou the arm and said, pointing to Mrs. Spread brow: "Do yon know this lady?" "Yes that is, I went to her house aud she -was " "Will you come out of this crowd?'' said Mrs. Spreadbrow, hor firmness suddenly forsaking her, "I I want to speak to you." "But I will miss my boat," ex postulated the girl nervously. My mother will be waiting for mo and what can you mean by calling a police man to stop me?" she coucluded with frightened eyes, as if a full realization of the situation had but just flashed upon her. "The fact is," explained the police man, "this lady wants mo to arrest you for theft, but maybe you can ex plain certain suspicions circum stances." Tho girl was white to tho lips now, and tho look of despairing fright in her eye3 was pitiful to see. "For theft mo for theft?" she said with stiff lips. "O, do come whero il is quiet," urged the accuser, looking as dis tressed as the accused, and then the three went into tho ferry house. "Sit down," said Mrs. Spreadbrow, weakly, when they had reached a quiet corner of the big room. "Thank you, I prefer to stand," re plied the girl, proudly. "And may I ask what you accuse me of stealing?" "I 1," said Mrs. Spreadbrow, trembling before the pale "little thief," "we think you took Mrs. Townley's purse out of my parlor this morning; you were the only person in tho room beside myself between the time she left it there aud the time we found it gone, and " "My God!" murmured tho book agent, dropping into a seat and cover ing her face with her hands. Presently she recovered hersolf, and, turning to the policeman, said: "Search my satchel, please. And you," to Mrs. Spreadbrow, "you may search my person; and may God forgive you!" "O, my dear, I can't I can't; when I look at you I can't be bo But everything's against you." Mrs. Spreadbrow's eyes were full of tears, aud her voice trembled. "There ain't no purse here bu't this one," remarked the policeman, who had been rummaging through the contents of the black satchel, holding up a slim pocket book. "That's mine. Look throngh it; you will find just twenty cents." The book agent spoke very calmlv. "That's right," he assented, put ting the purse back. "But, of course, the money may bo hid on tho lady's person, 'he added cautiously. "Here it is! Here it is!" cried a pauting but triumphant voice, and Mrs. Townley, flushed aud excited. rushed toward the trio waving a much-mauled Russian leather bag, such as some ladies are fond of carry ing their handkerchiefs and purses in. "It was that wretched black and white puppy! He must have taken it out of the parlor, aud Eddie found him chewing it to pieces in the garden. Why, what is the matter, Hattie?" for Mrs. Spreadbrow had dropped into a seat, and, regardless of enrions eyes, was weeping copiously. "I I I'm so sorry. But things did look so against you. Pie please forgive me." The little book agent wavered a mo ment, indignation, scorn and pity chasing each other across her face. Then she slipped down beside tho distressed littlo lady and taking one of her limp hands, said simply: "I do forgive you. Pray don't cry. Bat please, next time you miss any thing, be sure the black and white puppy hasn't taken it before you de cide thatauybody elso has." She could not refrain from tho mild shot, and though it was tremulously aimed, ft did not miscarry but went straight to Mrs. Spreadbrow's heart, whero it ha3 lodged ever since." And so it was tho black and white puppy! lie is a sedato dog now and a great favorite of Miss Amelia Banks ex-book agent who declares .that if it had not been for him sho would never have obtained her present lucrative and congenial position in Mr. Spreadbrow's office, where the painful memories of her experienco as book agent and other painful memories as well are fast fading into oblivion. Boston Globe. Bllntature Oxen, The Sacred oxen of Ceylon are de scribed by a recent writer. The largest specimen never excoeds thirty inches in height. Tho Marquis of Canterbury has one presented to him in 1891, which is now about ten years of age, and only ten inches tall. Not withstanding their smallness they are very nseful in Ceylon, where, it is said, four of them are able to draw a two-wheeled cart writh a driver and 200 pounds of merchandise, sixty or seventy miles in a day. A Medical S poon. Medicine cau be measured very handily by a new spoon which has no handle and is attached to the bottlo by a wire bracket clamping the neck and provided with two rings in which the spoon is pivoted to retaiu its posi tion when the bottlo is tilted, PUZZLE DEPARTMENT. i The solutions to theso puszles will ap peal la a suooeedlDg issue. .".3. A Corrugated Column, I. A fast runner. 2. Amusement. 3. Social distinction. 4. An excla mation denoting triumph. 5. Our club word. 6. A house of entertain ment. 7. A military musical instru ment. Centrals Down A naval hero of the Civil War. 84. A Square. 1. An evergreen oak. 2. The olive tree. 3. An ancient kingdom of Spain. 4. The language spoken by a race of islanders in the Irish Sea. 35. Six Pied Cities or Pennsylvania. 1. Caanstrie. 2. Hauckohnum. 3. Twoamillspir. 4. Datanow. 5. Yux wutspnnea. C. Bbrrgmhesuea. 30. Five Ueheadmenta. 1. Behead ono of the "lungs of a city," and have an old-time vessel. 2. A celestial body, and have one of the "meu behind the guns." 3. To send off, and havo a part of tho body. 4. A foot-covering, aud have a garden implement. 5. A plant, and have au apartment. SOLUTIONS TO P11KVIOU3 PUZZLUS. 29. A Crossword Enigma Mother. 30. A Pied Verse Tho lovely town was white with apple blooms, ' And the great elms o'erbead Dnrk shadows wove on their aerial looms; Shot through with golden thread. Longfellow. 31. Additions 1, covenant; 2, Clio; 3, mops; 4, violet; 5, million; 6, candid; 7, civics; 8, Balfour; 9, New Mexico; 10, Doddridge; 11, six; 12, lixiviate. 32. Hidden Housefurnishings 1, iitove; 2, stand; 3, sofa; 4, bed; 5, carpet; 6, chair; 7, stool; 8, table; 9, ottoman; 10, piano. The Spartan and the Sybarite. Should one, then, train himself to lift heavy weights, to bear heavy bur dens, to eat coarse food, to go with out sleep, in tho every-day walks of life? In short, should one be a Spar tan, daily depriving himself of the luxuries of life, or should one be a Sybarite, indulging in all luxury aud pleasure, and offering heavy prem iums to those who will invent any new form of enjoyment for tho body and its five senses? It is well to feel that one can be a Spartan if the occasion warrants it, and if one lives as a Sybarite it is not possible all at once to rise to the situation that demands the endurance of a Spartan. Never theless, it should not be forgotten that it requires a great deal of a certaiu kind of endurance, perhaps greater after its kind, to bo a Sybarite than to be a Spartan. Think of the prince of Sybarites that is, the man umong them all who was most noted for his luxury who, when ho went a-wooing into a distant country, took with him on his journey a thousand cooks! Think of the heights of endurauce in the way of digestion that it required to perform the gastronomic feats which would show a just appreciation of the results of their labors! To meet tho exactions of society to-day, in all its phases, requires unlimited powers of endurauce. The burden aud heat of the day may be borne by the Spartan laborers and mechanics, but tho bur don and heat of the day aud night are borne by the upper classes of the great cities. More than the African explorer, more than the soldier in active service, do they need staying powers and tho height of endurance, for it has been rightly said they go "the pace that kills." Harper's Ba ear. Cardinal WoUey's Hat. An interesting relio has just been presented to Christ Church in the shape of tho Cardinal's hat, which once belonged to its founder, Cardinal Wolsey. Unlike many relics, the hat boasts an authentio and fairly com plete pedigree. It appears to have been stolen by Bishop Burnett, who was clerk to the royal wardrobe and Bishop of Salisbury in William III. 's timo. It then passed into tho hands of Horace Walpole. One of the latest owners of the hat was Charles Kean, who wore it while playing tho part of Cardinal Wolsey in Shakespoare's "Henry VIII." The hat is in good condition, but tho tassels, which are so prominontly represented on tho Christ Church coat-of-arms, have been lorn off. Westminster Gazette. Did Oood For Once. He knocked at the back door of a suburban house and the cook opened it. He was a sinister-looking fellow, and the cook held ou to tho door. "Lady of the house?" ho inquired, grufily. "No," trembled the cook. "Master of the house here?" "No." "None of the people in?" "Nono but me," and sho tried to shut tho door. "Aw, como off," he growled, setting his foot against it; "I'll come in and have a good feed. Let go that door." She let go tho door, aud tho tramp went in aud fell into the arms of a burly policeman who was conrting the cook contrary to ordors. Boston Journal. Transcontinental Tracks. England's proposal to build an iron road right through Africa is in part conditional ou France making tracks the other way, Philadelphia Times. r TO TELL HARMLESS SNAKES. Bow the Folaonou Reptile Inject Tbolr Venom Into the Flesh. Harmless snakes generally havo two rows of teeth in the upper jaw and one in the lower, theso teeth being slender, sharp, comparatively short, and not set in sockets, as these animals do not tear or mutilate theit food. The teeth are simply used as hooks by which the food is drawn into the snake's throat. The bones of the jaw being movably joined together, the teeth are advanced on one side, securing a hold on the prey, and then on the other side, in which way the swallowing is accomplished. Poison ous snakes have two long, sharp fangs which appear to be flattened out like a knife blade and then bent np, forming a groove, in some cases forming a closed tube, open, however, at both ends, tho upper end of which is fastened to a bone in the cheek, which moves with case, so that the fangs when not in use can be folded or packed away. The saliva of all animals, even man, contains poison; though in man it is greatly diluted and of use in assisting digestion. Iu the poisonous snakes it is collected into sacs or glands placed on each side of the upper jaw, says the New York Sun. A delicate canal extends from the poison gland forward under the ye to the edge of the jaw and there opens into the fang, and to use the poison the snake has but to strike the prey; as the fangs enter the flesh tho muscles of the jaw press upon the poison glands, squeeze the poison through the littlo canal down through the hollow of tho poison fang in the wound. There is a most ingenious urangement in the fang. The open ing is not at the very tip, whero it ivould be liable to get plugged up with skin and flesh, but it is a littlo way up in front of the groove, so that the sharp point goes in first and makes a tittle hole into which the poison flows. Light Fare. Parents of growing boys have been heard to say that there was practically no limit to the amount of food their sons could devour. It is doubtful, however, whether one of these parents ;ould read with any feeling of pleas are the account of tho boyish experi ence of Leigh Hunt, tho English au thor. He was sent to school at Christ's Hospital iu 1792. In his autobiog raphy he tells of the schoolboy faro of that time: Our breakfast was bread and water. The bread consisted of the half of a three-penny loaf, oo-jording to the prices then current. This was not much for growing boys, who had had nothing to eat from six or seven o'clock the preceding evening. For dinner we had the same quan tity of bread, with meat only every other day, and that consisting of a small slice, such as would be given to 1 child three or four years old. Yet 9ven that, with all our hunger, we were very often left half eaten the meat was so tough. On the other days we had a milk porridge, ludicrously thin; or rice milk, which is better. There was no vegetables or puddings. Once a month we had ronst beef; and twice a year (I blush to think of tho eagerness with which it was looked for!) a dinner of pork. Ono was roast, and the other was boiled; and ou the latter occasion we had our only pudding, which was of peas. For supper we had a like piece of bread, .with butter or cheese; and theu to bed, "with what appetite we might." Youth's Companiou. Invitation on an Umbrella. Daring the afternoon of tho recent snowstorm a young woman of Phila delphia dressed in the height of fashion, started to walk down Chestnut street under the protection of an umbrella. At the time the snow was coming down In soft clinging flakes, and the um brella's surface was soon covered with a white coat. The young lady stopped in the conrse of her promenade to ad mire a beautiful window display of art ware, and while standing there at tracted the attention of a group of young men, among whom was the prac tical joker. He reached over and with the tip of his finger lightly traced on the snow-covered umbrella tho words "Kiss Me." The owner of the umbrella, all un sonscious of tho fact that she was the object of much attention, walked slowly on down tho street. Several rude young men, who saw the inscrip tion on the umbrella, peered rather boldly at the pretty face beneath it as '.hey pushed by. Th's annoyed her so much that she suddenly closed her umbrella and took refugo in a store, still nnablo to even guess what people were smiling at. Philadelphia Record. Do It Again, Please? Tho story is familiar of the little girl who, while in charge of an infaut brother, saw a cyclist "cropper" heavily from his high bicycle, and ap proached him as he sat on the ground, wondering if he ware still in this world, and said: "Please, sir, will you do that again? Billy didn't seeyer." A parallel to this yarn comes from the Irish Cyclist, which says that an old farmer quietly watched a wheelman lose control of his mount and go over a wall, machine and all, aud then re marked: "Well, well; and so they can make them leap now." London Tele- A Dragon in the Itock. Among the most wonderful mon sters of the Ago of Reptiles was tho ichthyosaurus, or "fish lizard." Last snmrner A very perfect specimeu was uncovered in a quarry at Stockton in Warwickshire, England. The creature is twenty feet in length, its head alone being almost four feet long. Tho ichthyosaurus possessed gigantic eyes, whose lenses could bo foamed at will I'm- different distances. It hunted its prey iu the sea. THE P0ORCITY BOY. Oh the city boy is bundled In bis heavy overcoat, With bis costly leather leggings, With a silk thing round bis throat. And he slides upon the sidewalk Wbore the ashes have been spread, And Imagines bo is happy , On bis bright new sled There's a bill that's high and sloping, la tbe country, far away, Where a boy who wasn't bundled Fit to smother used to stray; With tbo swiftness of the lightning Down the gleamlog bill he spod, And no ashes ever grated 'South bis - borne i mado ' sled Oh I pity tbe poor city Boy who never gets beyond Tbe narrow, asby sidewalk , Or some hampered little pond; Ab, the hill was high and sloping, And tbe way was clear ahead Where a country boy went coasting On a -borne made slod Cleveland Leader. HUMOR OF THE DAY. He "When we are married I will lie at your feet." She (interrupting) "Yes, and to my face, I suppose." Punch. Little Harry "Pa, what's an an achronism?" Pa "A brown wig on a seventy-year-old man." Chicago Daily News. With all the flowors of manhood That are blooming o'er the mead, 'TIs strange that little Wllhelinlne bbould take up with a Wied. Cleveland Plain Dealer. "By the way, Smith, you never use perfumes, do you?" "No," drawled Smith, lazily, "I don't have fo. I take a bath every morning. "--Paper Mill. Fashionable Young Lady "If 1 give you some money will you promise me to go and take a bath?" Beggar "A bath! And is it a mermaid you take me for?" ' Irate Patron "I thought this rail way was for tho benefit of the public" Railway Official "You're in error. The pnblio is for the benefit of the railway." Tid-Bits. Police Justice "If you were there for no dishonest purpose, why were yon in your stockinged feet?" Bur glar "I heard there was sickness in the family." Standard. Adoriug One (in lavender kids and a blue scarf) "Oh, how I wish I were that book yon clasp so lovingly." She "How I wish you were, so thatl could shut you up." Ally Sloper. There nre luurols for the horo And badges for bls'breaat; But tbe man who hasn't done a thing Gets a chunco to rest. Chicago News. "Hopkins cnght to go into the army." "Why?" "Ho's so brave. He borrowed my wheel and rode it all summer, and now he has brought mo a bill for repairs." Brooklyn Stand ard Union. Graham "Going to move? What for?" Whito "They've got a baby next door to my house, aud it makes so much noise my dog cau hardly get a wink of sleep all night." Boston Transcript. Burgling Bill "No, no! I won't go in again! She's talking in hor sleep." The Mouso "Well, datam'tnutuiuV Burgling Bill (hoarsely) "But she's ' a loidy elocutionist." San Francisco Examiner. "Were yon out iu all that rain?" asked the Clifton girl'. "No," said the young woman from Boston. "I was merely in the portion of the rain that descended iu my immediato vicinity." Cincinnati Enquirer. Frances "Harry says b e just wants to fall down aud worship me all the time." Her Mamma "Ob, well; don't mind that dear. After you'ro married he won't let it interfere with his business. " Chicago News. "Now," said the attorney for the defense, "here is a skull. Cau you tell us to what species it belongs?" "It's tho skull of a lawyer," replied the expert witness. "How can you tell?" "By tho cheek-bones. "Rural Home. Ofllco Boy's Brother "Johnny's sick a-bed, sir, aud won't bo able to come to work for a week." Employer "Indeed!" The Brother "Yes, sir; but he wauts me to gets what'a duo him, so he can have it to spend while he's out." Roxbury Gazette. Lady (in railway truiu ou windy day) "Dear me! I can't get this win dow up." Gentleman (behind) "I would assist you, madam, but I pre sume the railroad company has glued the windows down to prevent the loss of patrons by pneumonia. " New York Weekly. "When that maucamo to this town," said Rivers, "ho hadn't a rag to his back. Look at him now." Brooks walked to the window, looked in tho direction indicated, aud saw a swarthy sou of Italy walking down the street bending beneath the weight of a sack of rags three or fonr times his size, strapped to his buck. This led to an other quarrel between two old friends, Chicago Tribuue. A I'.ranlirul ffnake. Perhaps ono of tho most beautiful snakes of the United States is tho harlequin. This snake has perma nently creco poison fangs, is venom ous, but not fatal, and is of an ex tremely mild disposition. Its coloring is exceedingly rich aud beautiful, be ing red, with seveuteeu broad black bauds bordered with yellow. Tho harlequin is found from Virginia to Arkansas, while four other species in habit Florida and Texas. They spend most of their timo nnder ground, of tou being turued up by field workers, aud eeui to huve a fondness for sweet uotutues patches 2
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers