Advertising l?ate4s. ; Wo dosiro it to 1m distlncllytmderslood that no advertisements will bo Inserted in tli? coHtftfnWfnTCTIffiW AfrvrT&ATr'lliut may fiSlrocelyed from unknown parttap orj firfnsanl(3iBCcffinirf.ncu b tho cjisit, The foliowfng'jro 6ur osl reguroibYtcrrjis! fc nxirtioirAitK (ID LlNKsV n,, .JHt. oncli Insertion 10 els. civnnntlts. each insertion..,! .... loots- Tlirco months, each Insertion 20 cts, Lcssthan llireojnontks.firsWnsertlon $1 each (subsequent Insertion. 25 cts, Local notices 10 cents per line. fllkV.-MOttTjlLMKn, Publisher. CARDS, . ,u'ii) Ilnot anil Sline Slnlteri. ClWtonTlr.lney.ln Ltran't (iiiiMi'n;;. llnk street. UordiriptomjiniiJtUed work warranted. "t.r ' Attorneys.' TO UN Ki-fXiv' ' ATTOllSEV AT LAW. Offlco with Al'cn Criilg,nr.polte American Ho tel. aiAnKI3T.8QUAtlS, mauch chunk", g. J.i'iy-'y joiisucttjOLirrrc, f - ATTOItNF.Y ANDrConNsELL01l AT LAW, llroadway and 'Mirq-v hauii Streets. Opposite May bo criinsiltcd m Mcrm.ui. ihbS5.1j ATTOItNFjY ATLA.W 5 epn,siltililng. ; ASK STREET. LKIIIOIITO.S. PA. Dp.em'ocr IC-Om. ! " ' y- M. KAPSIlKlli ATro'llfJKY AND COUNSELLOR AT LAW, ByiKSTKMT.LHIIOHTOS'.PA. Itesl Estate nnd Collection Acencv. WllUluvnnd Sell Ilml Hutate. OonvejamliiK .leally done Col oetlons promptly undo. Settling r.tntoK tr ! dents a specialty. May be consulted In Lnllsh nd Herman. JAS. II. S Til UTII KltS, ATTORN 1Y AT LAW, 30lllce: 21 tloor uf lllioad's Hall, Illauoli Chunk, l'a. All bulnosj entrusted to Mm will bo promptly attended to. Iny27, ly. p .T. MICEII.IN, ATTOItNKY AT LAW Kelt Doorto First Nnllonal Rink, MAIIOIl CHUNK, PA. JK3-Cin li consulted lu Herman. IjanO. Justices and Insurance H. A. UIJl.TZ, justick op tul teace, OrncEi Llndermni'i. niok. DANK-Street, LVIIIOIITOX, PA. Convoynnclne. Cnllectlnit nnd nil other bn. no, connected with tlio office pi mnutlv at tend ed to Agent tor tno bcit File nnd I lfo liisnr. mice Cniupinloi i llents collccied at riwuiiible chatccs. &c. Aprh r.-vl JL CONVEYANCER, AND GENERAL INSURANCE AGENT The following Companies are Represented! LEllA.N )N MUTUAL Fill U, UliAillNO MUTUAL FIP.E, WUIMINO Flltii, FOlT.-lVILLU Finn. LU1IK11I FIIIK. nnd thoTIlAV HLEIt'S ACCIDENT 1NSU11ANOK, Also Pennnlvniili and Mutnil llorso Thiol Detoc'ivo and In-uraneo Company. Marcn i). 187 J 11103. KUMnrtF.il. Physicians and Dentists. "W. OFricE-itel'cr's Block. BANK STREET, LE1IIUHTON, '"enna. ) llesldcnco ...ftom 7 n. m. to 10 a. m , IILTJItS mill Uiio in In 10 p. in. ) l'arryvlllo ..fr'im In a.m. to 12 noon. Mav be consulted lu tha German LauRaao. Noroiubariu.yl yjy A. OISRIIAJlKIt, M.., I'HYSICIAN ANDSUIlOr.OX Eperlal attention paid to Chronic Plwises. Otllce: South Last corner Iron ami 2nd sts.. I.e hlihlon.Pa. April 3, 1875. o II AS. T. IIOltN, ill. 1J., OF"ICR I OVER II A. VHTEIt'S DJIUG SrOUE. DANK SI'., LEUIUUTON.rA. (lcneral.nraetlror.tloiHicrt lo.and SPECIAL ATTENTION aIVEf TO DISEASES OF WOMEN Mini 21 -yl jST II. IIUIIKI!, M. I). V. Sl.xiiuilnlug Surgcaii, rnAi'TICINO PHYSICIAN and SU t'OEON. Omen: Danlt street, iinnca'a IIlock, Lehicli. ton. l'a. 31ay Uiconeutled lu tho Clerm n Language. ' 'f -1 ti Nnv."31. D Livery & Sale Stables I1ANIC STItKIIT.I.KIIIOHTO.V, I'n FAST TltQT TING HOUSES, KLEOANT CAUUIAGES. And poiitlyoly LOWElt PlllCEs tliau any yj V y1) J Q'W" i n) v-o .la iy and haad'sonio' C'arlape's ft for r.lnernl pur joses and WcodlUAS d.vvio i:uiii:p.t Nov. .2 IS71 MDV DIU'AIITUKE. Thoundcrlrnedrerpretfnl'3'snnoupcesstohts iwtr in. nud iei pm,iio KBerlly. thai Iroui and uIlcrtiijj(titl,o, , Sell 5oods for Cah'"Only, and to thatcud hps mirii d down the l'nces ol 1m e.tlre slo-.k o! Grocemes and Provisions jTusItilU- jjTflio Coolest eas rrn'PEEs. 'iftlAns. sinews, i TEAS TOFFEES. IJO ATI 2. SPICKS. HAMS BHOULDI-llS. LAUD 1IU1TU.H. ECIOB. .to. Ac, ti. tho cry Lowest Prices. Best 1 am'y 1- lour i2.7u a sack and a'l otho' aitleles at rnually Low rrleea for Iho HwiilyOjm. PatronsKo wi:iciel and tiuctton cuaran teed luail cjioi. P. A. ANDREWS, New tlio Lru nnd bui nil. llrli'EO. Janll tf i'.vt;ut:uT., r.i. a GENTS -ft rort ou i NUW IN PJtKSH, HISTORY1 OF THrilTED1 STATES, UeniR a oomolete hltrt i t al the tmimrtant ioituri4 ol Amatioa inoluln-u Arlt,uiurc. MeohftrlMi). M .uuU' iirua Mining tMuimer citl it Ml o:her putrprnwn. Alnur 1(0 In ge vctavu mgtA unt JW tine Jijrrttvin, NO OTUKU WOHK LlKr. IT UCV BUB LIHiiKp. For Ttrmi ud 'Vf IeTllo w ppiy wi IIIRHRS'IIY nil.T 11 RI.TSII I Kn i . e.lI3l "kT (I, t 'NN jl 11 1 : .II-.VIoUTUisiEitropricior. VOL. VII., No 18. Railroad ?Guide. plill.A. b 1UCA))I.1) tlAll.UOAI). Arrangoment of l'ftsseDgcr Trnlus. NOV'HMIlEll KTII, ISTS. Traln.sleayoALLKMOWN astnllowti- ivia l'CHKioMii.v imAScn.) For r I'hllndclplila, nt 4:2, CM, It. 10. a.m., and b.& n. m SUNDAYS. Por riillodrlpMa at 4 In n.'ni..S.-V. ti. m. I VIA llASf l'FS.VA. llllASCH.) For Itoidlnz, t !.o. 5.50, 'J I'm in., 12.13. ' 10. 4.30 ai:u ii ui ii.m For llitiisonra. S.315C3, 0.03 n. in.. 1S.H, .30 11.0S II. in. for Lancaster and Colum'jla, S 33, 9.3, a.m. ami 4 30 p. in ' lliocsnot ran on Mnndnr SUNDAYS. Vor IleailinT.7 31 a.m. nnd 0 OJ p m. For 11 irrlsiiiirg. 2.a i n. in nnd o oo n. ni. Trains Foil A LLC NTOWN leave as follows! (VIA IT.IiKIOSlI-.WjmANClll) Loavo rinladclpliln, 7.4 . to., l.ou, J.30 ,ind 9.33 p. m. SUNDAYS, Loavo.Phllnriclplit i 8.n,M.rn and 3 15 p.m. (VIA 1IA9T IT.SSA linANCII I t.eavo Ilculng 7 4 ' 7.45 10.35O m.,4 00.)5 rnd 10.43 it in Leave Uarilslinrir, 6 s 10 a. m., nnd iCO. 4.00 and 7 53 n. la. Leave Liuicasier. 8.10 a. m.. 12. S3 and .1.43 p.m. Leave Columbia S.'fln. m ). 0 and 3.a.3p. m, SUM)AV. i f.cavo Ttendlnir. 7.J0 a.m. Leavo ll'irrliiurp.s.2 a.m. Tralnsjnnikoii llimi'i rnn to and from depot Oth nnd Oreon .atreets, riilhdelpbla other trains to n"dIrom Broad street depot. TiioC.50 ii. m nn(ir,.5ip. m. tinlns from Allen toirii.nnil Hit) 7.43 a. m and a.ai p.m. trams from lMnlndijlptiia.Miaro tlirough cars to and iroiu rlladclph'a. J. K. WOOT1EN. I (lei'ernl Maneaer. C O. TtAXCOCK.'Cm'l TIcKe! .Ircnl. Wc Avill Pav the Postage AND SEND 10U The Garbon Advocate ONE YEAR TOR ONE XOLLAll! Or Six Months on? 50 ceiits ! 1 wuicn is Less than 2 cents per "Week ron A LARUE 32 COLUMN PAPER!!! ADDltUSS, Carbon Advocate, Ldilgliton, I'n. SHOW THIS TO YOUR NEIGHBOR THE TOLEDO BLADE. NASBYSPAPER. RPFIiPF Vnil "Ubarnne Jornnvolli. lieilinencciivoITllj: TOLKDO IILADH. it is a Alammntll l.nrlit 1'aue Weekly Paner ol bUlv-tour Coimuus utleii wiih en-cfallv ire. oaio I loadiiijr ntittei of iiiteioit nu vuluo lo pe ijilotu ul pat wot tho Uuiti d States SPUCIAL FEATURES. All tho Ijopirtmcn a -vli.oi hive iuehIq Jiic llLAm: si pDtnilur nil owi tho Unit til htnlun. U' .to iptil irlv conl'iitiMl iittuuuv: lh' 1'i'p. ularL KurH ot t.mt DHilnt'uiRiiHl Democrat c iilitici mi. m:v li.T.iouiUM V Naituv, which nro wiiUfii xi.nH8i fir Tin: lium: our liOUSHIIUUl Dl TAUlMnNT. n lU'll lleiMHlt TP Ol Itruclicil inTi) "riutlm. upmi MiliJ ctx or itilriPt in tvoiy homo ; u Youmj i'J'.oi'LU'fi DUl'AltT M7NT t u ltc tgx u-i Deuurunrut emlmio n tho Miniior irnjl Xy-wtt char.nme runny; tu iji u-meta wit nmi iiuinor; Tin: jiVivr ."Toi;ii:r4.nuiti il nud -I'locicti ; aamykks to i-om.LM'OM)i:Msninl th L-it(t Ni-wb Iioui all part ni the wr tl. 2 in: i.nnr. ihcul itns larHiy in cvoi v Mate nitd Ti'irtnr m Iho Union ruii it cvriyvilidu n-c iin zi il a tlu .nrct'ht mul 1U .TNKWS ANP FAillJLY 1'Al. Idl puh ieheJ miywhiTO 'liv it ut.U ou will lirvo wilii itflv ho without it A qioht tho uew 1 oat una lot this winter fro a Bunei tX A, ndenonvillo Prison. Sketches, w ono who wb tl cro A now 8 tH st ry wa uMitiuetici'it Nov. Uih. Atiot j tr ouo will tom moiicfl in Joiiiiari . 'UIllM' 5HniO copv, por y nr 12 3 ' i flro cojiloH l,73 fQch ; ten or inoro toi'ios fr'.O oi ch ami mi Jstni copy with I'Vt-rv ilub ol ten. toVietliuyu oji04 m nt tree, send for ouo Ail. tltt'itt TOM;UO ilLADli, J xlouo, Ohio. Fifty Thousand Books rot- Sulu nt Ilnir I'rlcc. Wc. aro now nflVilnj; lo tho public, postage prepaid, iiiO.NE.UAI.i- tho rrinilar price .11 ly Ihnumnavoluiii04 Dt cUoieo books, ooiupiUum U.iolv. llio luohy, l-tcilon. l'oetrv. llunlor. .Mr dtuiii.IU'lia.ui e mid So entllio Works.iditloiis of htaudan. Authors elo., ete. TUnso books YhirrSyV iuu uoussener.. we novo muled lliououiuor taeae Ih-oks io al oart 01 the ommirj. and ,'rivJ"H',t cnt out Is AliltAN I'EI) l'i tH) f.x'P!lJ:v A" Ill.Plll.hl-.Nl'EU uud loKlc E. HUE S.iTIOl'Al' I'lON. CATALOGUES FlttiE. Ve hi o urim o l a lut. nnd n, i t 0 U1Olrin0 I a LrBt nnd liitim nln unln louo of our Jloofcii, rruu,.Qj uv Mil-JecU uno Oil aipl o tlou will mull c pies fnoto nnyud-ore-, o bh.-ul i Ito i u Mnl . o tten free imji uio.i Co leant iho wii'-ncvi't UMbed lodo ro. 11 persona leahlng thin adv itietnoiit mo roidiallv iinitwl io huo in hv totai ra.dr o.herwiM) tln iuuimo IheuiaeKoi und Mendt AUoren TOLll O UI-AUK Toieco, UuUi. Vick's ;Ploral Guide. A boautilul work of V rai , Ouo Coiortsl Fowei J'MlP. und I UhUutioim. wilh Dt wilyt onaor the uet Flower at.d V4teUblo4, ami l.owtog'ow dnui AllfJi a FlVK CKKT Mr ami in Uiigii-hoi n.rmuii. 'IU Fiow ruud Vyub o Uardn, 176 vagon, ing4 For 60 0 "-ttt lu uino. c vjr Jl In o.e 1 g.iteoUi. I "O rman ami Knuiuh. Vi k tl utrnuHlMothu VIxgune,Hy a coiored uti'o lu evert number uuu inauv nue e erivirg4. Trio i.'J5 b vo.irt Iivo Copie ftr ti. ti tAtiuieu uunil'i'i'M n?nt tor l eentv. V'lrtlr'j Wrkuli .it this liA.i I tl IKn u,.i I.I f-iv 1 1 ntbtahi' i r it nou; ua oocon.aiuu Lut ami i'uet and pi -uty of t irmutiiui. Adir.H-., JAMH'.VICK si 41 II 1 HI . MnnnfactuTcrof and Dealer In STOVES, RANGES AND HEATERS, Till aiift Sheet-Iron Ware bM General "House Fiuisliiiif Goofls. itooriMJ una si'oirri; ilono nt ehqrt nptlco oniLat Loivest Cash Prices. I am the n'ltlmnzed asct t for the Palo of tlio folloHln' FinsT-ULASS SIOVES T11K 8I1.VUII & GOLD MEDAL COOK, Till LIOltTHOUSE COOK. THE MAYFLOWER HA VfTH, TJ1E SUNSHINE RANOE and 1 ho NEW ANCHOR HEATER, and am Selling Ibein VE ItY I'HEA P lor Cash, rverv kind of SIOVEOIIATES and FIRE IIIUC KS ki pt constantly on hand. Stokc on SOUH Street, A feve doors obovo Bank St., LEIIIGUTON. l'atioiini..o solifllcil 3..tlEHc:longnarnnleiil. Oct. 0-1-1 A. D. illOSSEIt. The Grandest Exposition Of Ladles', Gent a, and (ifUldren's Boots, Shoes Gaiters E3ci offeiei Wlhisvleltirtf. tsat J.M.FHITZINGEit'S, Bank Street, Lehighton, Pa. 7 have Jitt received a full lino of FALL nnd win'i i;n hoots, shoes aim niniiiFEs, which I am Selling to tlio pruple of Lo ichtnn and Iho KiiironiKriiuneiirlil orhood CHIIAI'Ell TIIAr, liVi-,11 llbl ORE Sold in tins County. Meo, all c.usctsof Boots & ShoesMade to Order nr Astonlsbini-ly Low Prices, nd MENDING Neatly doiioni I'ricestoault tlio ilnioi. I invito iho p'io lo to cull and examine my stock anil l'nces heloro purxjansinir cucwhoio, nni be com lnccd nf iho nbjvn lacis. HOUND Tu SATIdFY.-lleade.madO Boots and -hoca bought of mo that ilp will be repair, cd without ch-irgn. Thankful for oast nalronnirn. I reKnpcfitllv ask a cuutlnuauco thou or. J. M. innziNGl';ll, Two doors below Roiulfr oi Hoffoid s Can iaRO Works, Hunk Hticec. Oct. c-yl Q.VltllOX ADVOCATE CHEAP JOB PltlNTIKG OFFICE, LlSlriGHTON, fA. Jtvcry dctcrlpllon of rnnllnir, from n Visiting Card to a Poster. CARDS, ' ' HILL HEADS, I.r.TTEU HEAD? NOTE HEADS. STATEMENTS, POSTERS. 1-nOGI.AMMES. HANI) DILLS, DODGERS, OIROULAIIS, SHII'I'INQ TAOS, ENVELOPES, PAMPHLETS. by-laws, ic, ilC. Dono In tlio best manner, at very Lowest Friers. Wo aro nreparcd lo do work nt as cheap rales aaeiiv cffle.o urihe state t.-,at deals nuuittlv wllhUsi.ii.lonicrs. OUR JIOTTOIS Cheap, Prompt; & Reliable. reorders by omall rcclvo prompt attention. jprlmo Homo Mndo Iircndl WHY OO HUNGRY! When yon can Bfty CI. IHinndsi't i'lrft Cliwi Biead- FIVE LOAVES FOlt 25 CEXT8 ! J. V. O'NEAL, tho popnisr Bread ami Cnko llllKer. Of Lelil Dili mi III i.rr'Arlnmrwt lm ,. n,.,u of the times has itei'iiud h Pr.oe of his toie bratcd IIoiuu Mndo BUtA o to Five Loaves forTni'iily-fivoCts. Cnsli. Sugar, Halsln Cucomut Scotch, Diop. uuaui aud other CAKE-5, only Ten Cent per Dozen. I.ooU Out Tor tlio Wagon! At MAUCII CHUNK, on Tuesday, Thursday anilHiiiiidjy .Mm nmi:.. LEHIGH TON and V El SaPORT, every Aficr noouixcept,lrd.iy. TEEMS STRICTLY CASH I 1 Patronazo .elicited J, w. O'NP.AL hl'OUUi Opposite Fliit National ll.inu. njirllsyi ljMji 'ireeul-oiilithliiii l'a. JE. Obciliollzer's Lliiiincnt, CAMPHOR MILK. TM tinV lllirlllV Treliiinf.n,1r,1 nn.l Arn...l I men fur llUiunritiBoi,' 1'iu.lul iet, Ailits , Pains, fores, Mmas. SwcIIuks, bpralii., etc H not Uioirrcateit vuluo in euiiuii Cuts.Galis, sp ulna ami sweldnes in buraes. li ncUqulelilv and suuly. It or onre soothes cu.i relieve, tho stiff 1ouit4 tha Lnuo Mo.cles aid iho AchniK Nerves '1 he money will bo 1 Paul back to nnv eno not .oil tin.! tv.th It.nf CCt". I'nco 13 cents. 9 bottles for tl. l'ie. I pared by Lottobethultzcr, U. D. Tim IMiwuix I'octoial. Has provod Itself to no peculiarly adapted to old persons. eonsurupilio uno chihircn. li breoes a cold. It stops u cini.li Itaidsetiixctornlio'i. II vivas liuuni.tclief It Hlv h-ruuili. u buiKr D ltMaiSMemoiii.tmies (hit, anv o.her mo Ueiuo Thousni 01 01 the C'tllelis (f K&Tt I r?.r l' 'i'.Y.1 J1U.IU."' M. and nr feclo ..ii.iriii a i ii hh, i yji in i u,eu it torie.i by A.J DUltt 1NO, Leii.ffhtou. Nov.W-Cai. t am now nrplylnc the erv Best I.AVTI MEK COAL nt tlio foilowihg Jane Prices. v)i No. 1 Chwinut by the? Oar.?.. JiVlperton No. i citnut. ton, 3 no per lou No.:cU,iuut,hytui'ar...v.... t S5 per ton No.! Chestnut, unmet n ,,, S 50 per ton Dttl.tVEIlKI). stove and" 1; Hitti at cn.ua ly Law l'rlcsa). J. L. GADEL, lienor in i GCNEUAL IlAltDWAUE, Oprsisltolbe iniblie t-'guiro. B VNK STB EE i I niniiTOV, Pa. roi.,197 INDEPE1TDE1TT LEIIIGIITON, CA11130N COUNTY, PA., SATURDAY, MAECII 29, 1879. Special Notices. TI1K WORLD'S HALM. Dr. L. D. WEYBij UN'S AiTcnATivn sincr rSA ri'inmli. lirn.l Till HTV.F1 VH VEAHS In a private pract.co,and never failing to ladlcally cuio Dropsy, Eiv'lpelas.Nceondarv srplillls. Or Diabi tcs. and nil disenaes In which tho b o implicated, is Itow offered to tho pub Ic. Mold br all 11KT Ml. IiauooisTS. mid In holosale onlvlbvrilU WEY11UIIN MEIIIC1NE CO. P. O. Box 338, Rochester, N. Y, PIMPLES. I will mail (Free) ttioicclpo for a n'mpte VCGKTAIltn HALM that Will remoTO TAW FWXMCW'.S. l'lMl'I.l'S and JlLOTCllUs, Tcavlnir HiOHliliiforr. c.carnndliwiut.tttli uIho In -mi' tlouHlor picdncm a luxailant crowth of lulr on a hnkl hf a 1 orsmootu f.ico. Attareas, tiicloMiii?3e. fetamp, Ilea. Vaud li & Co Ann Htioet.N V. TO CONSUMPTIVES. Tho ndvritLcr. I avlnir been permanently .urolof that dread fuse iso Consumption, bra s'mtiic leimdi .N anxious tomeko ki.nwn lo hi icllow.sitftciers tho mouna id cure. Tonll who fosiio It. ho will send a copy or the prescription iiaoJ, irieoof charge) wllh tho directions Tor preparmcf mid using the same, which taey will lludn Bunts CUiiK fjr COJsUMriios, AtTil Jl t, 11K(J.NCII1TH, it,!. Pailios iiisliini? tho rresrrlption. will please address. M. A WILSON, HI l'enu tticet, Wiluanisbureli, N. Y. ERRORS OF YOUTH. A OKTLKM A N whoftnlTerpd forypirflfrnm Nervou Vi;iUMTV.PJtKM ATUltli DJif'AY. nnd nil tho ffl'Ctin( joulhlul liidirrrtlnii. will for ine salto of suflpnnp hnmunltt , fend firo to all who need It. iho leclnu and dirccilon for ihaliiiiK tin- fllmpio rcmeuy hy which ho vns curd. HuiToicih wlltlnp to profit hy tho nd vt'itiacr'rt vxt ctlcncocan do eo hy addresliiA m perfect eonjldfiico. JOHN M. OODEN. 42 Collar St. Ts'. Y. PILES Of oil kind. TU 'JOItS, dlilmr pea of 11LOOD nr mucu miJ nil diRp.iM'H of tho Itl-XJTITIU quicklr and nor fir tl cmoJ hv a Plmpln ani) soothing UlCMKIiY. For liformation add s-t Uli J. FAllliXt & CO. 'il Aim wt., W Y, Jinaltli and Jlappinoss. f f oiltli and llnpplnrss aro Tncelcsn We'dth to their pomi'vFor-i and vec thov ro within tho icj.1i of every ono who will uao Wright's Liver Pills, thoonlv -uro CUfin for Toipid IJver, Dygprn nl a, Jletdacho, bour tstmnnch, Constipation, )ls tt'lit., Nautot. and alt HMIloiu Coinpialnis and B ood li(rdeift. Koim pennino iiiileHA Rip nee Win Wrlghii Thl.ti." If your Drnffffist will not isn)piv Mend 25 eentH tor mio box to llarilck Holler a Co 1 70 N. 4lh Ht., l'ldla. foot w8 DR. BARTER'S IMirlfh s, Curltin.s, ;lves Color and To no to tlio Illoml; it increases tho quantity as well as the quality, gio ing 1 Vyor, 1 'itality, Energy, Totccr and Life iteclf It li especially adapted to Female Diseases, anch as WoaliiPaa liom Kurslng, or any tthor cauo. paint al Irregular or deranced monthly periods, falling of tho womb, naneca In preg nancy, bterlliry, chanco of life, etc. Dr..Harter's Liver Pills Combine tho two essential qnalUiesof a Family 1111. Tney act nan mild and ofllcient purge ami (it the saint tlmo mo tho hcfct Liver Pilla ever offeicd to thopul.hc. Jruit.mO '"A FREE GIFT ! Of n copy nt my MFD1CAL COMMON SENSE BOOK, to liny pemon suiTi'ilUR Witil CO.VsUMl'IIOS, ASTHMA. CATAIintl. DllO.SCIIlTIS, Lcims tr Voice iiu toim tiiiioat. so. d name and post dlPee ndoi e&s with two 3 cent postage stamps ano ttalo vonr sicklier. Tao book is vleetintly illustrated. (HI no 12 mo. 1871).) Tlio inloimatieii it (ont-dtis, in tho pioviiicuco of God lina saved manv lives. Tl.o author has been tiett ni ditoa.es of tiie, is'oe, 'J'ainat, ami Lint;., nsp special piactlce In Cincinnati, slnco 15J7. Audi ess, Dr. N 11. WOLt li, Cincinnati, Ohio. Jail 18 wt IJll'OESTA'X' TO CONSUMPTIVES. A GPTitlrniiin liavinp- been no forttinatona to enic ols khi of Consumption In tho worn I f-tagos, nflei ho us iriveii up todlohy iho most cele oraiod nhysioiaiip, deMrcR to niaio known the car- (whifh p ov-h & jccessiul in every oaK'l Io tho-o cfll cted wi li Afethm i, llronchuis Conuns, Colds t o:iiumolion ni.d nil AlTecihms of tho Jl.roit mid Lung(. uim wib Bend iho ileo po, fuo of thtnge. to all who deslro it. It tho will forwmd Ihcir lu'.i.rrps to DANIUL AUKC, 21 Liberty i-t. Now York. JanltniG All about Its soil climate, its settled and Its vaciut lain!., Hh faims unit faimeis can l.o lenruoi in nil! Kansas faiimkh.ou oicht. pt'e wcoaly tiaoir. Inyenraoii Conespoi.d cuts In eveiy comity. Sent to any sddiess 13 wioxa lor A'l cent. Pot.tnf;e stumps taken ns moliij'. Addiess, HUDsOli .tEWINO.Tu peic. Kansas. 1 learned mote about Konraslrom your paper that 1 cull lely uiiou ihau from nil oilier kources. luchanl 11. Jliaua. i'olumltana Co.. it'A....Ii nesju.i what those ol uswnutiiiK to luov.. west mo.t wain lo know. Sam lie, Ciefter Uranueco.. AVuj lor. lanu iarse corps c f nld3 coutilbutors oace bhaft . ...'i he Sett ecrirnliiiralpapei lutho western couiitiy. Ht rma UIH frvaft.. ll m vnliialdo enper. -llriiioii Champion It Is null" ediUd. Vnrif 7 Karuur....A femlets nntsnoicu Joulli au Lawrence Journal ....our Kansas Ir euds Kl.ouidf el much pi loo lu tho liivhcliaiacterof ll.olr stale Aeiioulturnl pip r. Audonal Hie Atvcli Journal.. ..It bus iiu Oily l keu u lnuli p aieainiiiicaancultuinl Jjirnula.- .V. 1'. Jr(- owiie V win Hi v reire-i ntntlvo ol tho ureat W eel.- Phil'a. rt-nrfieol runner. Feb. S3 wl If you are in want of onytiilnir in the way of uurvs.Eiii'i.o, i:roe.vi:it,, I'lI.TOLs. Am i uniituD.Oiin Materlil rishins Tackle or nnv oilier l isi: trouTi.su (loops p c'im. wr lolormy l.arcollliiMiateiii'ataioxuu iied 1'rle List Mli'pli 1 man yum;. VouiBlrav. JOIIN!.TO.' UUUAl noTERX ounwuiiks I'UTiUuua, Pa. TlCIJ'I'ItS. tSoyi Itlllcrs, tin- Clio purest A: lcs I31lli'rs ever muilc. Tliey aro eompounded from Hops, Dueliu. Mniidrnke and Dandelion, tlio oldest, best. .ami fllll.l Villlinllln Inilil Intnl.. l II.a un.l.l rnnd contains all llio best and most curiitln Bproperfles r all oilier Hitters, belnir tin trreutest lllood l'urllier, I.lver Keirulator. C.n.l I 11., .....I llnnlll. I .... ..-I.. a? . ... earth. No disease or 111 liealth can nnaaildi Blonif exist where these Hitlers aro used, so fjvnnc.1 uml perieet aro their operations. i uey trn.1 new iuu uuu virur lo the nfroo ind lull, in. To all whoso employment eause irregularity of the bowels or urlnari K.i,,ir, in nituiiunvuii .,UllM;r, 1UIIH g ir mild Stttiiulunl, theso Hitters are luval guable. being lilitlily curative, tonlo and Estiinulntlnir. wlthuul lntoxlcatlnir. no uiaiier wnaiyourieeiniirorsyniptonita eh e, tvunt i iic iiineiiBu or iiuuieiii is, use nop IUers. liou'l wait until vuur are sick. I h'iui ii you ouiy ivei nau or miseraoic, ust Riho Hop lliilers at once It may save joui lire, llundretls have lieen savel by so do B'i.r. i .. 'ua in no imiu ior u case tliey will not cure or help. I I io not sulfur yourself cr let your friends! tinier, uui ueo unu uriro inem to uso noi Hitters. Iteinember. Hon Hitters Is no vile, druir reil. druiilceii nostrutn, but the Purest amln nesi .uoiiieino tver inuue t tlio " jiivaihrr, friend and Hope," and no person or fsinllj should be without them. Try tho Hitter KO-Uil . Iry Unit Toimli Ou o .train Ecllaf For Sale by Druzglsis. mar. 1 VOJt HUNT, a largo Double Dwelling House, altinlt nextt .O'lS'ell's llakery, .nasHi" i.iini. srcei, m me jtoruuKU ui i,o hlghtou Fur further particulars apply at tho Original Cheap Cash More of .1. T. NUS11AUM . SON. JUreh li, 1S19 if rpo WIIO.U IT MAV CONCEHX. JL'.i io f.. ii i .,, j Notice Is hcrebv iriven. that wher.fls'mv I wile, AI.VIiNA, has loll we without just i causa or pro uoatlou, all liersons are hereby iiooi -.,........... , ,vlUl moum wiue open, ami wiien ue pel sun on inyuceoMUt alter (Ills dale, us I will . , ., i.j. iw..tOMiher he aaul, ly no debts unlets cniiraeted by m tell per- couM get iih jaw, logetner lie said : t.niolii I'. W. L1..N IZ. Dniggisl. "Some infernal hyenahaswentandEiven Wi '-yer' r.i 'Lidi p mo away on mj digc." Live and Let Live. AsioNO tub roirrs. Tlio years may come, tho years may go i Tho Winter may bring licr flakcsorsnow i tjprlng; may come, then Summor hot Hut tlio delinquent subscriber comctli no, Up to tho eerntch. Sunleam. Zach Chandler camo down tho Scnato floor, ins right hand In his pocket, "Ah, yes Indeed, l'vo been hero be for o I And there's that same old docket Filled wllh bills and subsidies, which I'll havo to Invos tlgato at onco to Makoup for lost time." JV. Y. Expren. "Oomc here, you llttlo myth," said John, Then quick she soiled th. poker. And shrieked, as val'ously sho strode Towards tho heartlcssjokcri "Why must you orour littleness Continually taunt us? Am I John's myth?" "No, no I" said lie, "You'ro only Pokcr.haunt.us I" Tho last day of Winter has taken Its flight, Over hill, over valloyand glen. Tho sleeping musqulto with hugo nppetllo is urcamiug or leaving Ills den. Our Spring Poet. A l!uiigT- Tllnii. A man, I know, tho hungriest ono Thaf ever saw the light ; Ills goruiandltlng's never dono, lie's such an nppctlto. The story brought to mc, you know, Iiy little, listening birds, Was that a day or two ago, llo ate up all his words. Then going home, ho from n shelf A ponderous voluino took i And there alone, qutto by himself, llo coon devoured tho book. Still pangs of hunger no'cr rorsook This most voracloui male, Not only ho devoured the book, Hut swallowed, too, tlio tale. And still he longed for moro to cat, Yet eat bo would for lire. Until to lnako his meal complete, Ho tried to bite his wlfo. CAWGIUT !' A SKOIV DICIFT. Tlio Burlington Jlatclctc gels a disjinlcli from ono of its contributors, "lloaming Ito- bert," ilalcii at South Mend, as follows : My visions of Spring havo taken Iho wing, anil nrooffwith tho flight of tho stork, pad tho climate to-day, in a mild sort of way, reminds mo of Central Now York. For tho beautiful snow, ns you probably know, lias taken this country by storm j and with wonderful thrift it piiesdrift upon drift, in tho very worst kind of bad form. Tho trains are delayed and my lecture is played, for it's thirteen long miles to Car lislo j and tlio way it is snowing end drift ing and blowing, thirty rods mako n protty long mile, So delaying I wait till tho storm shall abate, and some kind of a train comes along, when shorter and fleeter than any short me tre, I'll cut olTtlio rest of my song. But with portent most dire, still higher and higher, still jiilo up tho drifts at tho winder; wllh llio roar of a gong tho storm sweeps along, and no ono seems ablo to hinder. It's provoking, oh very, I thought Febru ary a season devoted lo thaw; but tlio ground hog I guess its ho Just like neces sity, knows neither season nor law. Tor tho flakes whirling down I can't seo the town : I can't loll llio South from tho Bend ; for all I can see, all tho world except me, lias suddenly como to an end. It's just my blessed luck, in adrift to get stuck, and I think if I sought the equator ; that a snow slorm would follcr and fill ev ery hollor, with tho drifts of a seventy cightcr. rORKnOABIXOS. , "lilow, blow, Ihou Winter wynd, Thou art not so unky-lnd As man's lngrat-chl-tudo :" Tho folk at New Carlisle, AVlth unbecoming sinllc, Will say : "Ho might have got hero ir lie wude." llut how can a feller get anywhere, When tho drifting snowflakes fill tho air. And tho trains are all behind? When ho can do nothing but stand and staro At tho useless tlmo cards here and there, That grimly answer his anxious stare Uy asking him "what ho can find ?" When Iho best he can do Is to sulk and mope, And vainly hopo against hopeless hopo, And vaguely Into philosophy gropo And endeavor to feel resigned While ho knows, as certainly ns he can sec, How awfully mad the Ccmmltlce will be, Tho inuph abused, patient Committee, With tho hall man claiming his rent or he'll sue, And a hill for dodgers and posters due, And nothing to straddle, tho Wind? rou iii.-rxi:it oit woicsr.. Tho old man Bendigo keeps a pretty sharp eyo on his daughter Mary, and many a would-bo lover lias taken a walk after a few minutes conversation with tho hard-hearted parient. Tlio old chap is stuck this time, however, and cards aro out for tho wedding. After tho lucky young man had boon spark ing Mary for six mouths, llio old gentleman stepped in as usual, requested a private con fab, and led oil' with: " You seem liko a nico young man, nnd pcrliops you aro in loyo with Mary ?" " Yes, I am," was tho lionoct reply. ' Haven't said anything to her yet, havo you ?" "Well, no; but I think sho reciprocates my affection." " Does, ch ? Well, let mo till you some thing. Iter mother died a lunatic, and there's no doutt that Mary has inherited her insanity." " I in willing to take tho chances," replied tho lover. " Yes, but you see Mary lies a terrible temper. She has twice drawn a kuifo on me with intent to commit murder." " I'm used Uiilhat gotla sittcrfjust' liko her," was tho auswer. " And you should know that I have sworn a solemn oath not to give Mary a cent of my property," continued tho father. " Wtll, I'd rather start in poor and build up. There's more romanoo in it." The old man lad ono more shot in his carbine, and ha Mid i " rerhajw I ought to tell you that Mary's mother ran away from -my home with a butcher, ami that all her relations died in I the poorhouse. These things might be tbrowu up in after years, and I now warn you." " Mr. Bendigo," replied the lover, "I've heard all this before, and also that you were on trial fur forgery, had to jump Chicago for bigamy, and served a year in State Prison, for cattle stealing. I'm going to marry into your family to give you a decent rejHiLitionl there no inanas goon Dyer- Mr. BeDdigo looked after the young man, SI. 00 Why She Had Not Married. Thcro was one question which puzzled the good people of Canton a mystery they could not fathom and that was, why Miss Vent nor had not married. Talented, handsomo pud wealthy, surely it must have been her own fault. Although thirty-fivo years of age, sho could still have queened It over tho best society in tho village, and had her pick of the marriageable men j but her cold dig. nity and rcservo raited an effectual barrier, keoping both society and suitors at a respect ful distance. Miss Vcntnor had resided in tho vlllago of Canton ten yenrs, nnd the people wcro no belter acquainted with her than on the first day she camo among them. She lived ion liltlo vine-colored collage, surrounded by tasteful, oven elegant grounds. Tho trim servant sho employed knew tut litlto moro about her than the people. Sho never inndo calls nor received any. Sho contributed to several magazines, and spenta' large portion of her time in reading, although in summer sbo worked hours, cyen days, among tho flowers in her garden. Ono beautiful morning, as Miss Vcntnor was busy culling a bouquet of flowers, sho heard a baby voico exclaim: " 0, pitty, pitty lowers!" Turning, she saw a child about thrco or four years of ago peeping through tho rail ing, with her tiny hands outstretched. Do you want some flowers ? Como hero little one. Tho child entered the gateway, and with out any hesitancy approached Miss Vent- nor. Sho was dressed in white material, richly embroidered, and with a jaunty littlo sun-hat shading her golden curls. Around her neck was clasped a heavily wrought golden chain, from which was suspended a locket, almost loo largo and too heavy for such a child. Ono glanco into those deep hazel eyes, and Miss Vcntnor, self-possessed woman though sho usually was, trembled violently with agitation. Littlo girl, what is your name ?" sho questioned, her voico sounding strango and husky. 'Graoio." "Oracio what? Whoso littlo girl are you?" "Why, papa's, of torso." "Whcro does your papa live?" "He's 'toying uplliero in that big house"' indicating tho direction wilh a nod of her golden head. The hotel, you mean." I dess so." Aren't you afraid to go into tho street so far, and alone?" The littlo girl looked up in surprise, and shook her head. "Not when papa and mamma aro with mo all tho time." Miss Vcntnor looked around, lint to her astonishment saw no one. "Whcro aro tliey? I do not seo them." "Here," replied the child, tapping tho locket with ono tiny white hand. "I don't kiss papa in hero much, but I kiss mamma ovcry night. Don't you want to seo 'cm!" Miss Vcntnor knelt down, and with with trembling fingers unfastened the lock et. It contained a life-liko picture of a gen tleman, with brown, wavy hair, deep hazel eyes, and proud, aristocratic features, and a lady's sweet, child-like face, with largo appealing violet eyes, aud a crown of yellow hair. She gazed longest al tho faco of the gentle man, and a look of pain swept over her faco as sho noted tho firm, almost cruel, lines about his mouth, and thought of tho words last spoken to her by thoso lips. Wou't you kiss papa ?" asked the child. Miss Vcntnor touched tier lips to tho picture, then hated herself a moment after. "Now kiss mamma." Miss Vcntnor shook her head, whilo a hard look came into her dark eyes. Why not? I kiss mamma's picture most, for papa's up there, too, and mamma's only in here." "Whcro is your mamma?" "Dead, papa says. They put her in tho dark ground, but I dess they took her out and put her in here." "Dead?" repeatod Miss Ventuor, the hard look vanishing from her eyes, and a tender pity stealing into its plaoo. Ah! that word will stop the most bitter current of thought. "I dess I must go now," said tho child, "papa'U bo so scared." You never could find tho way alone. Come into tho liou.o and I will send Italy witli you." "Who's Taty?" "The girl that works for me. Sho will take you safely to your papa." " ics, I'll go with Taty. After a few minutes Kaly, a good-natur- e I, rosy-checked gill, stood ready to escort her littlo charge. "Itemembcr, Katy, do not go into the ho tel, only In sight of it," Miss Vcntnor said, for tho second time. "Very well, miss." "I ncod not have taken that precaution," thought she, bitterly, as sho entered the house. "It is not likely that ho has any desire to seek me," she ndded, with a sigh. A few days later, tho same little girl was soon in front of Miss Vcntnors dwelling, stoutly tugging at tho hand of a fino looking gentleman somewhere about forty years of age, in her efforts to draw him toward the gate, and adding her voice In entreaty. "Do tome, papa! She lives hero Iho lady that kissed your picture und wouldn't kiss mamma." The gentleman had seen Katy from the window of his room, and supposed her to bo the person Grade talked so much about, and mentioned as having kissed his picture. He scarcely gave this a second thought, judging shu bad simply done so to please the child, because sho had requested it; so, as Gracio would not allow him to pass the house, but persisted In her entreaties to cntcrdio thought he would call and thank tho girl for his child's safe return lo him. He entered the gate, with Grace triumphantly dancing at bis side, and walked up to tho little porch. Katy stood at tho entrance, watering some plants. "Good morning." "Good morning, sir." "I called to thank you for the trouble you took to bring my little girl home the other day," "It was no trouble at all, sir," returned Kaly, modestly, Grace stood silently by with a pout upon ner lips. i Year if Pnid in Advance. ' If not paid in advance, $1.25. "What is tho mailer wilh my little girl now?" the gentleman asked, kindly, strok ing her head. 'That Isn't her," she said In n grieved tone. "I want to seo t'other one." "It is my mistress sho means," said Knty; "plcaso walk In, nnd I will call her." Miss Venlnor, sitting by the window, and heard his voice, and a face so whilo met Katy's eyes that sho started back in alarm Miss Venlnor smiled a forced smile. "Do not bo alarmed, ICnty, I am only n littlo dizzy. I havo worked too hard wilh my pen la lely. I must take a rest. "Liltlo Gracio and n gentleman aro in tho parlor, and want to seo you?" "Very well, I will be down in a moment," bIio said, just as calmly as If her heart were not striving to break its prison with its wild throbbing. The gentleman stood wilh his back lo the door, studying a rare painting, when Miss Venlnor, looking very palo and haughty, swept into tho room. Gracio sprang for ward, shouting gleefully: "It is her, papa the ono that kissed vour picture." A wavo of crimson sweptover Miss Vent- nor's face. Little Gracie had unconsciously dealt a tcrriblo blow to her pride. Tho gentleman did not seem lo notice the child's remark. His eyes wcro fixed unon Miss Vcntnor's face, and his own was palo as ashes. Ho took n step forward. "Imogene, am I dreaming, or do I again look upon your face after so many years?" I lien ho sank into a chair and buried his faco in his hands. After a few moments he looked up. "Forgivo mc; I thould havo said Mrs. At- wood." "I do not claim that name," should cold ly. "Havo you never married 1 I Iiavo al- ways thought of you as Oeorgo Atwood's wife. Aro you really Miss Vcntnor still ?" "I am." "Will you lell me why you never married him or another?" "Becauso I did not love." "Oh, Imogene, can I dare hopo that vou have remained single all theso years becauso you could not forget that you onco loved mc? Nay, forgivo me hear mo out," ns ho saw tho flash of haughty prido which swept over her face. "Imogene, can you forgive mo when I tell you I have never coased to lovo you, and how I havo suffered for those cruel words which parted us? I thought then 1 was only doing my duly, and was just lo myself. You remember I embarked im mediately for Europe. I had not been one lay out at sea when I becamo convinced that I was wrong in my mad jealousy of Gcoreo Atwood. As soon as I reached England I sent a repentant letter, begging you to for give and lovo mo again; but tho answer which I received nearly crushod my heart." "Iho answer?" she Interrupted. "Inevcr received or wroto any letter." 'What can this mean? I certainly re- ccived a letter in your handwriting, stating mat my reponlanco had come too late, ns you wcro alroady tho wife of Gcorgo At- wood." "It was a bnso forgery I" "But who could havo been cuilty of such a thing? I would havo sworn it was your writing." "No doubt it was Gcorgo Atwood himself. He used often to bring mo my mail, and he could imitate handwriting to perfection." uno rasa all" "Hush bo not severe I George Atwood is dead, and nt tho bar of a higher tribunal man ours." "Dead? I had not heard of this. Youaro right; I will not judgo him, and shall strivo not to halo his memory. After I read llio contents of that letter I was ill for many weeks, and after my recovery spent ycarB of rcsucss wandering in foreign lands. In a tiny English cottage "I met Gracio's mother. My heart was strangely drawn towanl her, and I thought by marrying 1 could forget my nrst love. I trust I did not wrong tho sweet girl who becamo my wife; I loved her deeply and tenderly, but moro as a father loves his child, aud I daily thanked God for licr sweet, trusting love, which made a bet ter man of mo. I mado tho few years sho spent wilh mo entirely happy and when I laid my darllngaway to rest I mourned her tenderly and truly. Imogene, I have told you my story. Can you forgive, nnd love ino well enough to bo my wife?" "I can, Ernest, for, strive hard as I would, I could not forget you, and that is why I havo never married. I, too, will ask you to forgive mo. I was proud and wilful," "My darling, thcro Is nothfng to forgive. Though parted so long by plotting ones, let us both strive so to live that tho years we sjiend together shall be an atonement for what we have missed." 'And, Ernest, let vs no longer think of him who caused our estrangement, but rather of littlo Gracie, who was Instrument al in God's hands in brluging us together. Sho has stood there in tho corner some time, lost in astonishment, and entirclv neglected by us. Como here, Gracio." Sho sprang into the arms outstretched to receive her, and was clasped to Miss Vcnt nor i bosom. "Gracie," said her father, "This Is lo bo your new mamma, and you must lovo her dearly." "Oh, won't that bo nice? I'll have a mamma now out of the picture I Why don't she kiss you now, papa?" "Yes, Imogene, why don't you?" The good people of Canton filled out Iho romance to suit themselves, and it was as tonishing to learn how many know all along that Miss Ventnor had corresponded with Mr. Tcyton a groat while, and been engaged to him a year. But what difference did it make so long as they were happy ? A traveling salesman for a Chicago firm established a store of his own at Berlin Heights, 0., and left it in charge of his wife and a clerk. On returning from a long trip he found that the clerk had sold all the goods and lied witli the money. On further investigation he learned that the clerk had taken his wife, loo, Cashier Clark ol the National Bank of Lowell, Mleh.,wasuoTIier rogue who hid his wickedness under religious ootivily, His word was regarded by the direc(o1?as sacred, and once, when an examination of his books was suggested, tear, welled up in his eyes, and he seemed so hurt that the idea was never broached again, In the same moetlng of the directors, he inveigled them Into counting three notes twice as assets, . pilled ataAe had iTscd up about all of the bank's surplus of sbout 3a,00f. The Carbon Advocate, And Independent Family Newspaper, Published every EATUBDAY, lu Lehighton, Carbon Co., l'a., by ifAitiiv v. itioirainirixn. OFFICE n A XKWAY, a short distance above the Lehigh Valley It. It, Depot. Terms: $1.0iXper Annum in Aflyance. r.vitnt BrBCroTTios of tlain aud fakct JoTd Printing AT VK11Y low miens. THIS A THAT. "Virtue Is Us own Toward." Tho rmy is regular, if not high. This little stir about the Chinese sent the price of washing up two cents on the dozen. If'John" must go, ho isn't going off in a cheap manner. cc JYcm. Lcg-is-lalors Is tho latest and most out rageous misnomer for the female performers In variety shows, Dakota Territory has a new town called Eden; There being a great absence of women in Dakota, perhaps tho name Is safe enough for the present. There never was but onoshlrt-maker In this country who understood how'a bolton holo should bo placed in a collar, and the died with llio secret tintold. When a man tries to pick n quarrel with tho moon, it is not very hard to guess where he spent his evening; ho has been to his "lodge." "Oh, what fish balls, 10 cents!" Is the sign nt the door of a New York restaurant. Another of those horrid conundrums that run in schools. How can anybody know what fish bawls 10 tents. An uptown man says he had the best auction-car in his family. It belongs to his wife, and it hears of every auction in town, much lo tho lightness of his purse. Wo nro willing to swallow a grcal deal, in tho way of a tough yam, but when n moralist asserts that the devit goes about "liko a sheep in wolf's clothing," we feel in clined to ask some conundrums. Nothing mokes llio average small boy feel moro liko swearing, after cleaning off tlio sidewalk in the evening, to woke up tho next morning and find it recoveicd with snow, especially if it's a legal holiday. Just so. An exchange observes : "Not one cent for paying honest debts, but mil lions for hunting mares' nests." This should be engraved on llio cofiin.plalo of a certain Mauch Chunk editor when ho dies. A gentleman who kicked an Inoffensive person down stairs in mistako for a book agent paid the paltry sum of $5 to hush the matter up. Ho placed his V-toc, as it were upon any furlher proceedings. A moral philosopher remarks that "Un limited activity, of whatever kind, must at last end in bunkruptcy." The bustling hornet and lively Ilea can never bo cowed dowd by such flimsy philosophy. Tho village is flooded willi spurious silver coins. Wcnskod an Irishman here if ho had any idea whcro they camo from. "Yes, sir, they come from some fellow's base mint, and the buyer passes Ihem back to to tho seller again." A gcntlo maiden's love-letter: "Dear Jimmy It's all up. Wo nint going to get married. Ma says you oio too rough, and I guess she's right. I'm so sorry I but can't you go lo Philadelphia nnd gel filed down ?" A young man who was kicked off the front doorstep whilo endeavoring to see his girl, by her enraged papa, was too cautious to call him an old pirate, but he didn't hesi tate to brand Mm as a freo-bootcr. Ever since II got out that Rome was saved by the cackling of geese, legislators havo settled down to the conviction that only by their eternal cackling can the jwo plo's rights bo maintained, Verily, tho gooso has much to answer for. Sccno : Fancy hosiery : facetious youlh purchasing a bow for his sweatheart, Face, (lousyoulh loshop-girl "lsupioso you have all kinds of tics here, Miss?" Shop-girl "Yes, I bclicvo we have, sir. What kind would you liko to sec?" Facetious youth (winking to his sweatheart) "Could you supply mo witli a pigslyo?" Shop-girl "With pleasure, sir j Just hold down your head and I'll lako your measure." Tub Icau, It often happens that a man is willing to pay a compliment even when ho is una ble to pay his othor debts. A compliment, however, may look liko tho honey of the bee and yet conceal tlio sting of tho wasp. A certain lawyer was compelled lo apologize to tlio Court. With stately dignity l.o rose in his placo and said "Your Honor is right and I am wrong, ns your Honor generally is." Thcro was a dazed look in the Judge's oye, and ho hardly kneiv whether to feel happy or flno tho lawj-cr for oonlompt of Court. Capt. Boylon swam from Oil Cily to Pittsburg with the temcraturo of tho wa ter below zero, and tho only effects he ex perienced was llio peeling of llio skin off tlio nose. A woman sat two hours in church whcro thcro was no fire, took a chill and died In two days of pneumonia. The mor al is as plain as the noonday sun, but we wouldn't odviso a womanjn swim Irom Oil I'ily to rittsburg In preference to silling two hours in a Tireless churoh. Bockland Courier: Professor' "You will repeat llio lesson on Iho battle of Bun ker Hill." Student (after a longand pain ful silence) "Please sir, I can't." Profes sor (with a frown) "Why not?" Student (timidly) "Because I hajebcen deceived." Professor (astonlshod) "In what way?" Student (humbly) "I havo always been lold that history repeats Itself, and so I didn't troublo myself to study tho lesson." The new dollar notes lo be issued by the Empire cf California will have In the centre a picture of Emperor Dennis I. Over this picture will be tho Imscriptlon, "Pool your issues." Beneath it will bo the words "Tho Cliineso must go." Around the edges of Iho bill will be a row of wash tubs with Mellcan women presiding and a swarm of dead Chinamen at their feet. A CANUID OPINION. A Detroit lowyer, famous for his wise and candid opinions, was the other day visited by a young attorney, who explained i "I was admitted to tho bar two years ago, and I think I know something about law, yet the minute I arise to address a jury I forget all my points and con say nothing. Now, I want lo ask you if tlils doesn't show lack of confidence in myself, and how can I "Jfiveroome it?" 411.3 niM.LM.nrj ... -y - .-Moled the pate a moment before answering i "My young friend If it Is lack of confidence in yourwlf it will someday vanish, but if it is laok of brains you had better sell out your office (tfeeU and buy a pick-ax and a long-handled shovel." "llut how am I to determine?" anxiously asked the youug man. I'd buy Ihe pick -ox anyhow and run mvohaiH!" whispered the aged adviser. "'""fr1 ovor to lhc IS ow et,
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers