The Highacres collegian. (Hazleton, PA) 1956-????, December 16, 1974, Image 2

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    Page Two - Highacrea Collegian,
A
CHRISTMAS
TAIL
by Donna Marie Bayer
AA I wandered beneath the
ice-laden trees I could feel
the spirit of Christmas float
ing in the air around me. The
sound of chimes from the fake
bell tower assailed my ears
with Christmas fellowship and
I could see the snow on the
Commons roof. I was content
with being alone, for at this
moment I felt at one with na
ture and the winter wonderland
surrounding me. The sunlight
was reflecting off the
icicles high over my head and
3itglyarrpslitsta
BOARD OF DIRECTORS
i•nna Baver...Editor-ilk-Chief
hristie Tito.. Executive Edito
erry Roselevich..Business Man-
alter
Donald Serfass..Managing Edito
Dr. Michael Santulli...Facul
ty Advisor
mrl
NEM D. Serb's' - Editor, D.
Eimer, J. Gormley, M. Eydoek,
D. Mace, D. Mayo, C. Tito,
D. Yost
FEATURE: D. Bayer - Editor,
C. Tito.
ILLUSTRATION: D. Serfage, C.
Tito.
ADVERTISING: J. Roslevich-
Ifttor, D. Bayer
EDITORIAL: C. Tito.- Editor,
J. Barton
COMPOSITIONI D. Bayer - Man
ager, D. Mayo, J. Boelevich,
C. Tito
The COLLEGIAN is located
in the PUblioations office
in the Commons Game Boom
December 16, 1974
the entire scene was faintly
reminiscent of the "fairy
land" that one imagines as
a small child.
I was totally immersed
in my reflections of Christ
mases long past, when I es
pied a squirrel standing on
the pavement in front of
me, glaritiratlne as If to
say that I had no business
invading his private domain.
Not wishing to appear rude
(and also being possessed of
a rather strange sense of
humor) I kowtowed to him and
said, "Good afternoon, Mk.
Squirrel."
He glared up at me again
and his little eyes glittered
red. "What's good about it?"
Taken totally aback by
such a negative reply (in
fact, any reply at all) from
such a cute amd cuddly little
creature (forgive me, Mr.
Squirrel, I didn't mean to
insult you), I stammered,
"We11....1 uh....that i 5..."
"Well, miss, is it, or
is it not a good afternoon?"
"Well, sir, you see...
I-had thought 50... but..."
"And don't you think so
now?"
"Mind your manners, girl.
Respect your elders. Now,
"Well, to be perfectly would Mr. Scrooge talk to a
holiest, sir, at this point, squirrel?"
I don't know what to think." "I doubt it, sir."
He glared again. "Not "So I had to find another
at all consistent, are you?" way of convincing him of his
"Well, not usually, but--" wrongdoings and giving him
the feeling of love and fellow
ship of Christmas. Three spir
its was recommended by my
public relations man. Besides,
spirits to give him the spir
it has a nice ring to it."
"So do the chimes, sir."
"Will you stop interrup
ting me? Now. Mr. Scrooge
"But nothing! Do you know
why this is not a good after
noon?"
"No, sir."
"This is not a good after
noon because I should have been
hibernating four weeks ago, and
I am very, very tired."
"Well, sir, I don't mean
to pry, but---"
"Why aren't I sleeping?
Well, listen, miss, and I'll
tell you. lam not permit
ted to hibernate this year
until everyone on this cam
pus has the Christmas spirit."
"Oh, how awful....and
doesn't everyone have it?"
"No, unfortunately not.
There is one man who doesn't.
He is your Assistant Dean and
we will call him Mr. Scrooge."
"Oh, surely, sir, he must
have the spirit."
He curled his upper lip
over his teeth and snarled at
me. "I say he doesn't. And
I should know."
"Just how should you
know, sir?"
"I am the ghost of Jacob
Marley, and I am am waiting
for three spirits to visit
our Assistant Dean and con
vince him of the error of
his ways."
I shuddered, for suddenly
the cold air seemed colder.
"Indeed, sir. Three spirits?
Whatever for? Couldn't you
convince him yourself?"
He sneered at me. "How
many people do you know that
would stand and talk to a
squirrel?"
I looked around to make
sure no one. was watching. Sure
enough, I was talking to a
squirrel. I wondered how my
analyst would react to this.
I decided he probably would
not believe me at all. "Er...
not many, 5ir...."
"And do you think that
Scrooge is nutty enough to
talk to a squirrel? Sorry
about the pun."
"It wasn't a pun, sir.
It was merely a poor attempt
at one."
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