Thursday, December 2, 1993
by Paul Lorio
nifiiiwltif
They don’t know her but what
thefak
They’ve got nothing else they
can do
And they've no reason but
still they come
And I would have a hard dine
facing you
This crime the shame of what
a man can do!!
(Toad the Wet Sprocket)
Everybody tea an opinion of
what the worst thing that
somebody can do to another
human being is. Some think
it's physical assault addle others
think that murder is the most
vile Of sins.
For me, rape is far more evil.
At least if someone is dead, die
pain stops. The victims of rape
have to live with that pain their
entire lives.
I’ve been on this campus for tor* her five years after the rape
almost an entire semester now. to even cope with it Many
I have gotten to know many women able to cope with the
peapfe siaoe I’ve been bate. rape and feel it’s their fault
I was surprised to find that of The rest of this column is
all the female students I know, dedicated to any woman who has
at least EIGHT of my friends ever been raped and didn’t know
have been raped either here on where to go. The information in
campus or dining their lifetime. this column is from the
Now 1 know that we all heard pamphlets that the Health and
the statistics on rape, but this Wellness Cooler gives out For
A failure
by Dave Barry
Symtbcoltd Coltmmisi
Now that my son has turned
13, I’m thinking about writing a
self-help book for parents of
teenagers. It would be a
sensitive, insightful book that
would explain the complex,
emotionally charged relationship
between the parent and the
adolescent child. The title would
be: “I’m a Jerk; You’re a Jerk.”
The underlying philosophy of
this book would be that,
contrary to what you hear from
the “experts,” it’s a bad idea for
parents and teenagers to attempt
to communicate with each other,
because there’s always the risk
that one of you will actually find
out what the other one is
thinking.
For example, my son thinks
it’s a fine idea to slay up until 3
a.m. on school nights reading
what are called "suspense
novels,” defined as "novels
wherein the most positive thing
that can happen to a character is
that the Evil Ones will kill him
BEFORE they eat his brain.”
My son sees NO connection
between the fact that he stays up
reading these books and die fact
that he doesn’t feel like going to
school the next day.
"Rob,” I teU him. as he is
eating his breakfast in extreme
slow motion with his eyes
completely closed, so that he
Take Back the Night'
been able to put faces to the
'names of the ft
is their busmeaft but I fee! if 1
did nothing, I would be no better
than thpiajpists.
Many famous people have
been raped. The musical artist
Tori Amos was raped a few years
back and it was her song “Me
and a Gun” that made me realize
just how appalling rape could be
for the victim. 'The song is
about what went on in her mind
during a rape. The following
paragraph are lyrics from her
song.
It was me and a pm and a
man on my back and I sang
holy holy' as he buttoned down
his pants. Yes I wore a slinky
red thing, does that mean I
should spread for you, your
friends, your father, Mr. Ed."
After the song was done live
at a concert, the entire crowd was
speechless. Tori said that it
sometimes accidentally puts food
into his ear, “I want you to go
to sleep earlier.”
“DAD,” he says, using the
tone of voice you might use
when attempting to explain an
abstract intellectual concept to
an oyster, “you DON’T
UNDERSTAND. I am NOT
tired lam SPLOOSH (sound of
my son passing out face-down in
his Cracklin’ Oat Bran) ”
Of course, psychologists
would tell us that falling asleep
in cereal is normal for young
teenagers, who need to become
independent of their parents and
make their own life decisions,
which is fine except that if my
son made his own life decisions,
his ideal daily schedule would
be:
Midnight to 3 a.m. - read
suspense novels.
3 a.m. to 3 pjn. - sleep.
3:15 p.m. -- order hearty
breakfast from Domino’s Pizza
and put on loud hideous music
recorded live in helL
4 p.m. to midnight blow
stuff up.
Unfortunately this schedule
would leave little room for, say,
school, so we have to supply
parental guidance (“If you don’t
open this door RIGHT NOW I
will BREAK IT DOWN and
CHARGE IT TO YOUR
ALLOWANCE”), the result
being that our relationship with
' our son currently involves a
the Center which is located in
the Carriage Bouse or call the
Crisis Hotline at 870-7087.
Rape is any Sexual contact to
which one party does not
consent. It is atop defined as a
brutal act of hostility directed
priararily at women with die
purpose to terrify and humiliate
the victim. Most rapes are not
for sbxnil gratification but rather
a feeling of power.
Rape is it form of sexual
harassment Some other forms
ofsexual harassment Include:
pressure for sexual activity,
repeatedly asking for a date after
a person has expressed
disinterest, and unwelcome
patting, hugging, or touching of
to communicate
certain amount of conflict in the
same sense that the Pacific
Ocean involves a certain amount
of water.
At least he doesn’t wear giant
pants. I keep seeing young
teenage males wearing
ENORMOUS pants; pants that
two or three teenagers could
occupy simultaneously and still
have room in there for a picnic
refuse to wear on the grounds
that they were too undignified.
The young men wear these
pants' really low, so that the
waist is about knee level and the
pants butt drags on the ground.
You could not be an effective
criminal wearing pants like
these, because you'd be unable
to flee on foot with any
velocity.
POLICE OFFICER: We
clothing.
What to do if your are raped is
a question that pops up many
times, tf you ale raped please do
the followingr.:
Get to a safeplace as soon as
you can.
Try .to preserve all physical
evidence. Do not bathe, use the
toilet orchange clothing.
Contact the Health and
Wellness Center and Police and
Safety. Get medical attention as
soon as possible.
The reason for the medical
attention is because of the advent
of sexually tramsmitted diseases.
The attacker could be carrying
gonorrhea, syphilis, or even be
HIV positive. By receiving
medical attention, you could be
saving yourself a major problem
in the long run.
Finally, contact a close friend
who can be with you until you
feel safe again. Rape is also a
very emotional crane and if you
are a victim, you will have
feelings of helplessness and of
bring violated
On a college campus most
rapes that occur are of the “date
rape” type. These are committed
by people the victims know.
To protect yourself from this
type of rape, here are some tips:
Get to know the person before
you go out alone with thorn.
Let someone know where you
tracked the alleged perpetrator
from the crime scene by
following the trail of his
dragging pants'butt.
PROSECUTOR: And what
was he doing when you caught
up with him?
POLICE OFFICER: He was
hobbling in a suspicious
manner.
What I want to know is, how
do young people buy these
pants? Do they try them on to
make sure they DON’T fit? Do
they take along a 570-pound
friend, or a mature polar bear,
and buy pants that fit HIM?
I asked my son about these
pants, and he told me that
mainly "bassers” wear them.
“Bassers” are people who like a
lot of bass in their music. They
drive around in cars with four
trillion-watt sound systems
playing recordings of what sound
like above-ground nuclear tests,
but with less of an emphasis on
melody.
My son also told me that there
are also people called “posers”
who DRESS like “bassers,” but
are in fact, secretly, “preppies.”
He said that some “posers” also
pose as “headbangers,” who are
people who like heavy-metal
music, which is performed by
skinny men with huge hair who
stomp around the stage, striking
their instruments and shrieking
angrily, apparently because
somebody has stolen all their
are, and when you will be back.
Be assertive with your date. If
you mean NO, say NO!!
Passivity may be interpreted as
permission. Sex by force is
rape. Set limits and
communicate them clearly and
firmly. Don’t give in to
pressure.
This final note is just
something that I’ve noticed.
Out of the eight people I know
who were raped, not one of them
reported their rape.
By not reporting the rape, die
attackers are getting away with
it!!! The only way to stop it is
to make the attackers pay fra it.
By getting off, they will only do
this to someone else until they
do get caught.
Women, make these
pay. Report your crime to
the police. TAKE BACK THE
NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One little girl is beaten till
she faints
Told that this is love
Told that she would have to
take it
One little girl is just a bit
confused
She thought that she Was
human too
Take Back The Night
(Toad the Wet Sprocket)
shirts.
“Like,” my son said,
contemptuously, “some posers
will act like they like Metallica,
but they don’t know
ANYTHING about Metallica.”
If you can imagine.
I realize I’ve mainly been
giving my side of the parent
teenager relationship, and I
promise to give my son’s side,
if he ever comes out of his
room. Remember how the news
media made a big deal about it
when those people came out
after spending two years inside
Biosphere 2? Well, two years is
NOTHING. Veteran parents
assure me that teenagers
routinely spend that long in the
BATHROOM. In fact, veteran
parents assure me that I haven’t
seen ANYTHING yet
“Wait till he gets his driver’s
license,” they say. "That’s when
Fred and I turned to heroin.”
Yes, the next few years are
going to be exciting and
challenging. But I’m sure that,
with love and trust and
understanding, my family will
get through them OK. At least I
will, because I plan to be inside
Biosphere 3.
Dave Barry writes for
The Mini Herald.
His column appears
every week in
The Behead
College Collegian.
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