Thursday, October 1, 1992
Innocent Blood puts the "Bite” on the Big Screen
by Rick Kastan
The Collegian
I am not gay. I just wanted
10 state that for the record. I am
not gay, neither in the
emotional sense nor in the
sexual sense.
I had to get this off of my
chest because some of my
friends have expressed some
interest in the matter. So here
it is again, I am not gay
dammit, just picky (and I guess
a little too opinionated).
You see, I just don't find
Renee Russo (Lethal Weapon 3 )
and Julia Roberts (you KNOW
who she is) and their ilk that
attractive.
I know that by saying this I
have broken the cardinal rule of
manhood (the one that says to
be a man you must first find all
women below a certain body
weight undeniably attractive and
then proceed to nauseate them
with constant sexual advances).
I DO believe in this principle
(as well as the others pertaining
to where a woman belongs and
what say she should have in guy
business - but I'm not even
gonna get into that) and my
views on Tinkerbeil and
company are the exception not
the rule.
Call me crazy (and I know
you will) but there should be an
Mr.
Two worlds col
Liam O'Mahon:
The Collegian
Tomorrow opens another
film in a long succession of
baseball-oriented plots in the
movie industry. Following in
the path created by such box
office hits as The Natural, Bull
Durham, Field of Dreams, and A
League of Their Own, Mr.
Baseball promises a new formula
for the game's portrayal.
Jack Elliot is a popular
American player who is forced to
play overseas in Japan to prolong
his career. Tom Selleck plays
Elliot, the rebellious, happy-go
lucky star accustomed to the
American style of play. When he
begins play with the Chunichi
Dragons; two worlds of baseball
collide in a comedy of conflicting
cultures and lifestyles.
The Japanese and American
leagues have similar uniforms
and equipment, but they play far
different types of game. In Japan
it's often more admirable to tie a
game, rather than win or lose.
Selleck has long been
America's most recognized male
actor on television and the big
screen in such movies as Three
Men and a Baby, An Innocent
Man, and Three Men and a Little
Lady. This time he stars in his
life-long dream role as a Major
League ballplayer, and he didn't
just step into the part. He
attended training camps and
former major leaguers coached
him in hitting.
The film is directed by Fred
Schepisi, (who also directed
Iceman, Roxanne, and A Cry in
amendment excluding all
women whose lips take up more
than 50% of the skin on their
head (Ms. Roberts and Ms.
Russo included). I just think
that an actress should have more
acting ability than she has teeth.
I'm not gay, I just have
different tastes, and as of this
weekend, that taste is for
French.
In John Landis' new film.
Innocent Blood, French-beauty
Jeepers Creepers get a load of those Peepers!
Anne Parillaud stars as Marie, a beautiful vampire in
Innocent Blood.
Anne Parillaud steams up the'
screen as she makes her
American feature film debut as
seball
lide on screen
the Dark.)
Co-starring with Selleck is
Japan's most celebrated actor,
Ken Takakura (who starred in
Black Rain). He plays the
venerable manager who is in
conflict with Elliot's way of
playing.
Selleck's female counterpart,
Hiroko, is played by Aya
Takanashi; who struggles to find
her niche in a mostly male
dominated society.
Dennis Haysbert, who was
seen in Major League and Navy
Seals,
plays the other American
ballplayer. He gives Elliot advice
and his experiences in Japan.
Elliot is dumped for a rookie
star so he joins the Dragons, but
he also has to play by their code
and ethics.
The practices are harder and
teamwork and unity is crucial to
each game. He must also learn
not to play as an individual,
because selfish play is frowned
upon by the fans.
Hiroko wants to become more
independent and Westernized, and
she comes to Elliot's aid because
she understands his trouble with a
new lifestyle.
Most of the film was shot on
location in Nagoya, which is
Japan's fourth largest city. More
than 100,000 people showed up
to watch the filming.
Both countries should enjoy
this film as it attempts to relate
to both the U.S. and Japan's
lifestyles and customs through
their common love for the game
of baseball
The Collegian
Marie, a vampire and fellow
Pittsburgher who literally likes
to put the bite on the bad guys.
You may remember (but you
probably don't) the beautiful
Ms. Parillaud in the 1990
French thriller La Femme
Nikita where she first blasted
her way into my heart. If you
didn't see the flick...she's HOT.
She's got a cute little accent,
eyes to die for and a smile that'll
get your blood pumpin' to
places you may have forgotten
about. She's HOT. ..and you
can count on her to protect you
in a bar-fight. She's just....hot.
Oh, and I guess she can act
good too.
Marie is a vampire living in
Pittsburgh, and dining presents
a delicate moral problem to her -
- one that she likes to solve by
biting only those who deserve
to die, and then finishing them
off with a shotgun in order to
keep them from living as
Undead.
But she runs into a problem
when she puts the bite on mafia
boss Sal "the shark" Macelli
(Robert Loggia) and
unintentionally creates a
formidable enemy in the
process.
Her problems only get worse
when undercover cop Joe
Gennaro (Anthony LaPaglia)
starts trailing her in connection
with his Macelli case (anyone
else see what's coming?). Yup,
you guessed it, a love story,
with some nice dead-undead sex
thrown in for good measure.
So, what do you call a film
that mixes equal parts horror and
comedy, blood and guts with
tongue-in-cheek and a bit of
full-frontal female nudity
(compliments of Ms. Parillaud)?
Some would call it offensive or
pornographic (you know who
you are). I call it a damn
good time.
Lh' s>a
nday
f the Library
AM til 3 PM £\ |l
Kr
Page 11
Innocent Blood is one of
those rare film occurrences in
that it's a film that mixes horror
and comedy successfully.
Acting is generally good,
especially Parillaud who's smile
could win an Oscar and Loggia
who chews up so much scenery
in this film that he could have
used Liberty Avenue as a
toothpick. Also, it's always
good to see that Don Rickies
can still get work in Hollywood
(PGH).
Speaking of Pittsburgh, I
have never seen a movie where I
could actually recognize where
every scene was filmed and it's a
lot of fun to see if you're from
there (chances are that you are).
Direction from John Landis is
fine. He's traveled this path
before (An American Werewolf
in London and Twilight Zone)
and it should be old hat to him
now.
And for those of you in the
know, Landis serves up his
usual spat of director cameos,
this time including Sam ( Evil
Dead) Raimi, Dario ( Suspiria )
Argento and Pittsburgh's own
Tom (NOTLD) Savini.
So, for a good time and a
little bit of Pittsburgh
nostalgia, go see Innocent
Blood. It doesn't take much
brains but then again it's hard to
think when you’re drooling.
li
!:* «
P