THE TIMES, NEW J1L00MF1E1J), l'A., DECEMUEll J3, 1881. THE INDEPENDENT! 27 orauioit rcttftnwi netrw! fi tifcd fft (;. 1 iih i(RV. .loiKeii Cook. fotnlil (Mini In HW. A? an t1vnrti of ftiitl-tnv(ry t1 of rvt'Tnn in rt'llwiim nnl itnlltiro, Tub I n i m it knt nt tm w InTitui a rt'Ciynlr.cd pnwvr thruitvlutiit tlin country, H hiMiifMU' 1m pvor Iwimi nmnlftiitly irr.twlntr. An it nan fmtulii ntrninnt ulnvpry mm lor htn., imntturr. mi It will tluht ftio.lnnt Mnrmnti.iun. fur Mil Horvico Ut'twrin, mnl for unHy In iilHlrn, aim! rMif'rui iiprlM'litnt'HsIn nil thliiK". It empln.vA Hip bent eillhtrlAl tnliMit aim! HpioikM fi'nrlf"Mly uit nil utilOccln. It iava for rimtriliiitoil urtiWen Ami t-r eilltnrtul hitv.i'pb more limit diiiihlu tliu Amount paid by Any otlmr weekly licwKpain'r, U pultllwiifn mnr rnlifrloiiH iHpihaIhiia tbnn tit r. llwluiin rcvii'Wrf, ni'n pmfrv And t rl tliAti lit pnpn Inr iiidiithllcH, nnd uw nuirit Intnrnmtloii than Ati km nitftl cvol-iiw nti, TU hm( t'ubln illHpAtitnrfl rm-i'iiMy iulHli".l f rom 1 biftt'nt M 'tlnnlM Cmnwll In ,niiilm HnAfitidlllnilruti(m nf what I hiik.'kniknt In ronxtnntly dnlnir. A lint nf tlio nit promlmnt reli- r. ri'tiiH Atnl phlliMiiphfcAl wriii-tn, ihhw nnnmiry wrnrra n Hip pminfrv Ih ttn 1 i t nf tin ivtntflhntnrn nf THK iNiiKPRNiivxr' 11 tsiilin tlm HitArH net Afltdn fnr thm) wrltiM'B find for PtUtorlnln, thuri- ar twenty -twn dlntlm't Hartnu?tit, rdiu-d by twenly-twrt Ai-fttulM, which lii"htdo ItibllcAl K''ntvir(-li, Niniihtry. I.piI, Fine Art a, Mumi Hrtt-nc", IVhbJcM, lVrmmiilillcn, MlnUtiM-tnl Heir. Inter, Ilymii Not", Hi'htinl And ('hIIi-hm', liHt'tntuns Hp. IbrtouN fnti'lH'tn(, MIkr.mi, Hundity nchonl. Newnnf the week, Klnatiee, 'omv'riM lnNiit-titt' Mtorlim, lu Eli's, and AifrliMillure. 3i Pnuo In nit One AubeHpthn mwt ywir $9 00 For 6 nmnttm, I.M)j for H months , u 7 A 4nenliii'rlMon two ypnr ft W One Hiilmeriptiou with one riKWHulmeribur, in one remlttftiiee B UU One nnlHiTtptlon with two mkW HnlmorlberA, In nne rent lit tunc T 00 Cne nulmcrlptlon with three mkw mibeiiherfi, In one remittance g CO Oue Btil'HiTiptlon with h)r hrw Aiilmerlbern, In onenMiilituneo 1(1 H One mitiNi'i-iptlon hveyenrR 10 IW Any innn Imt over tlve At the aujritr, lnvariahly with one remittance. TheRP red ii red prieen itfia ier Aiinnm In rlnlw nf five ur more) ire very much lower than any of the ataudtrd tvlMnttfl weeklii'A. HnbKcrlbe with your friend And get the low rnte, We offer no premiiinin. (Nmtrnry to the entom nf ell the T'dlfflmiA newniip item, Tup lNitt-.irNiiK.NT will hereafter tie stopped at the etid ir the time for which payment in nmde. Htnd poHtal C4i-fl for free Hpui'lmen copy and JndtfO for J"OU rMf It. A il ' 1 1'UHH THE INDEPENDENT, 2iil ltroadwny, Xew York: 0 62d YE4H OP ODEY'S 3jiKly'w "Boole, IaOW lrlt-c of 3 lor Year. THE OLDEST AND Jt EST LADY'S HOOK IN TUB WOULD. SEE THE MONTHLY CONTENTS FOU 18S2. A COMPLETE NOVEL 7.V EVERY NUMBER I ItAHlrie the following oM-tlmo dipc.laltlo : Beautiful Oilnliml Hteel 1'lntB EnaiavliiKH, 1)6 nlKiieil by K. (). I). Dnilev. Dluuram I'm lei in fnr l.aille and Children. MainmotliCuloied Kuililon Plntu. Short Mtorle.t, lNwrnnand sketches. Our Popular Novelty I':ik In Colors. Illustrated Art ami Fashion Home Work. Architectural Designs for lleautlfiil Homes. (todey's Keeliies, (Jodey's l'uzzles and (fumes. Monthly Chit chat on Fashions, oto., eto. No Continued Stories. EVERY RUM HE It COMPLETE IN ITSELF t MAKING NEARLY 1200 PARKS Of Original Letter Press aud Illustrations In the full year's Issues. Subscription!! will be received nt this olllee In clubs wltli this paper. Tun Times and oodry's La i iv Hook for one vear, postpaid, only H.ua Sample copies 2o cents. All news dealers sell It. HOW TO KliMIT (Jet a P. O. Money Order on Philadelphia, or a Draft on Philadelphia or New York. If neither of these can be had, send Dank Notes In a registered letter. Address, GODKV'S LAUV S HOOK PUBLISHING CO. Limited), 1000 Chestnut St., riilladolphia. Pa. THE HTJIY. NEW OKK, lb2. Tub Hun for 1H83 will make Its fifteenth annual revolution under the present management, shlu. lug, as always, for all, nig and little, mean and gracious, contented and unhappy, ltepubllcan and Democratic, depraved and virtuous, Intel!! gent and obtuse. Tub Sun's light Is for mankind uud womankind of every sort; but Its genial warmth is for the good, while It pours hotdlHCom fort on the blistering backs of the persistently wicked. Tub Sun or 1SC.S was a newspaper of anew kind. It discarded many of the forms, and a multitude of the snperlluous words and phrases of ancient Journalism. It undertook to report In a fresh, succinct, unconventlonalway all the news of the world, omitting no event of human Interest, and commenting upon affairs with the fearlessness of absolute Independence. The success of tills ex periment wis the success of Tub sun. Itetlected a permanent change In the style nf American newspapers. Every important Journal established In tills country In the dozen years past lias been modelled after Thb Sun. Every Important Jour nal already existing has been modified ana bet tered bv the force of Tub Sun's example. Tub Sun ofl8H2 will be the same outspoken, truth telling, axd interesting newspaper. By a liberal use of the means which an abund ant prosperity ailords, we shall make It better Chan ever before. We shall print all the news, putting It Into read able shape, and mea'iirlug its imporiance, not by the traditional yardstick, but by its real Interest to the people. Distance Irom Printing House Square Is not the first consideration with Tub Sun. Whenever anything happens worth report ing we get the particulars, whether It happens iu Brooklyn or in Bukhara. In politics we have decided opinions; and are accustomed to express tliem In language that can be understood. We uv what we think about men and events. That habit U the only secret ot Tub Sun's political course. Thb Weekly Sun gathers Into eight pages the best matter of the seveu daily Issues. An Agri cultural Department of unequalled merit, lull market reports, and a liberal proportion of litera ry, scientlnc, and domestic Intelligence complete the Weekly Sun. and make It the best newspa per for the farmer's household that was ever printed. Who does not know and read and like The Sunday Sun, each number of which Is aGolcouda of Interesting literature, with the best poetry ot the day, prose every line worth reading, news, humor matter enough to till a good-sized book, and infinitely more varied and entertaining than any book, big or little? If your Idea of what a newspaper should be pleases you, send for The Sun. Our terms are as follows: For the dally Sun, a four-page sheet of twenty eight columns, the price by mail, post paid. Is ai cents a month, or J 50 a year; or, including the Sunday paper, an eight-page sheet of fltty-slx col umns, the price is 05 cents per mouth, or 87.70 a jesr, postage paid. The Sunday edition of Tub Sun Is also lurulsh ed separately at II. 2o a year, postage paid. The price of the Weekly Sun, eight pases, tit ty. six columns. Is SI a year, postage paid. For clubs of teu sending J10 we will seud aa extra copy free. Address I. W. ENGLAND. PuWiaher ot The Sun. 47-51 New York City. 11 GREAT STATE TRIAL I A complete nnd authentic record of the evidence, itpeevlies, address aud studied Insane sayings of 6MII I ASM The Crime Its Causes and Its Consequences Htalwartism as explulued on the Witness Stand by Hon. James G. Blain Graphic Exulting Scenes In Court Attempts upon the Assasslu'a Life Sketches of the Principal Characters eu eaged iu this world famous Criminal Trial bO.OOO.OO'i people await lu auxiety the Evidence In tills the most iieinarkable Trial lu Amerlcau History. Anano In every town. THERE ARE MIL MlJ CI1 IS LIONS IN IT. Send 60 ceuts forout- Uintari nt, and secure territory at oner. YVatimU Address, UNION PUBLISHING CO., Philadelphia, Pa. IWJ Pliilndeltthln Advertisements JLOYD, SUPPLEE & WALTON, WHOLESALE Hardware House, No, 025 Market Street, . tJiUivii)lphlii, Fenn'iL Ready Mixed Paints ! k u c a s HEADY MIXED PAINTS I NO WATER, NO CHEMICALS, NO BENZINE, BUT A PURE Oil, 1'AINT, HEADY F Oil USE. 80 BEAUTIFUL SIIAUES OF ,1'AIST BENT BY MAIL. ITIH PUT ON LIKE OTHER PAINT. MADB WITH LEAD AND OIL, VIZ: N ICKLV BltUSilKDOUT. NOT FLOWED ON LIKE WATER PAINT TJRT5T IT, Ami Ton WIU I'roYO It to bo the Best Liquid l'ulut In the Market. .TOIIJN LUCAH Ac CO., Philadelphia, MANUFACTURERS OF Snlss and Imperial French Orceu, WHITE LEAD, COLORS, VARNISHES, &c 13T For Sample Cards apply to F. Morti mer, Now liloomllold, V., or to John Lucas & (Jo., Philadelphia. DWARD S. ZEIGLER & CO., Successors to ZlEULEll BWEARINUEN, Importers and Dealers to Hosiery, aiove, IllbboiiM, NuipeiKlerN, TUBE ADS, UOMBS, and every tarletyol TRIMMINGS & FANCY GOODS, No.30, North Fourth Stroet. PHILADELPHIA, PENN'A Agents for Lancaster Combs. w. H. KENNEDY WITB TRIMBLE, BRITTON Co.. WHOLESALE GROCERS, No. 603 MARKET BTLEET, PHILADELPHIA. 7 1 gOWER, POTTS & CO., BOOKSELLERS, STATIONERS, And Dealers In CURTAIN & WALLPAPER. HLAMt liOOKS Always on hand, and made to Order, Nos. 530 Market and 621 Minor Streets, ntlLADELFUIA, TA. HA."ALSO, Publishers of Sanders' New Read, ers, and Brooks' Arithmetics. Also, Robert's History of the United States, Feltou'8 Outline Maps, etc. JANNEY & ANDREWS, WIIOI.I.SAI.K GROCERS, No. IX MARKET STREET, I'll il uric! phi u, Ia. QRAYBILL & C0 WHOLESALE DEALERS IN . ' Oil Cloths, Carpets, Shades, Brooms, Carpet Chain, Wadding, Batting: Twines, &., And a tine Assortment of WOOD and WILLOW WARE, No. 420 Market street, above 4th, PHILADELPHIA. BROWN'S to 'r i IS RiiRF in s i ADDC-TICrD hJl 1 HI I ta I UUl i yi i iron niTTinta nro lilgtil recommended fur nil disnascs rcqiilritiK rortiitti fltyl nlllili,tif iitilnt n.tnntitll 7i., .- r..,.'.-.,.. j B :, ,,, - - " - m ft - ' 17" .i,,..7,...,w. .H.yyM-. i-.liriclU'S Hie IHOOd. m I HtrctiKllit'iis tlio nitiscli'SjiiiHl jjl ves new life to llic nurves. Tlipy not liko a elmrin - on Hi illcstl ve (irjrmis, rtmminri all (?s;ir;)d'c nrmpltnm, such ns Timlinif the land, ' ' litrhinr),!fi'(itinllifSlimiifh,ll.iirlbrn,rl('. Tlio only Iron ll'rinra(loil g iiiimnuijioi. iiiiit's-f1!! I IIO TCt'i II Or JflVO JU'aillK'llO. Moiil liy . nil tlrtu-Klsts. 'Vritp fur tlin A II (' Hook '.VI tip. of useful nnd Bmiisitiff rend- lug) taUree. JIKOWN CIUIMICAL CO., llulllinoro, Md. rroi'osHloiial Curtis. CHAS. J.T.Mul NT! HE, Attorney-at-Law , New llloomlleld, Perry no.. Pa. -All professional business prompt!) andfaltb fullyatlendnd to. H'i lv. JOHK (JAI.VfN WALLIS, Attorney at-Law aud District Attui nrv, New lllooiiilleld, Pnrry Co., Pa, "Olllcn over Mm Miner's new store. All legal business promptly uud carefully trausaclvd. May 4, lssil. JK.JUNK.1N, Attoi uey-at. Law, New llloiiiullelil. Perry oo., Pa. -0llliie Next door to the residence of. Judge Junklu. 4nlt J-KWlH I'OTXKlt, ATTUUNKY AT LAW, NEW BLOOMKf ELD, PERKY CO.. PA. -Clulins promptly seoureil collected Wrltlngsand all legal business varefullyar-leud ed to. ,ii yi GUAR), ''.8 11. SM 1 LEY. Attorney nt Law. New llloomllt'ld, Perrv Co. Pa. -0lllci 'wo doors east, of Joseph Smith's Hotel. August 2, 1H7U WM. A. SPONSLElt, Attorney-at-Law, Olllee adjoining his resilience, on East Main street, New Dloomflold, Perry Co., Pa. 82 I J WM. N. BEIHKRT, Attorney-lit Law, New I) 1 ixi in II el cl . Perryoo,. Pa Uloomllnld ,8.131V. IRWlSPOTTHIt. NOTAHTfUHLtc, New Bloom J Held. Perry Co., Pa, Deeds, Bonds, Mortgages and Leases carefully Erepared and acknowledgements laken. All Inils of Pension and Bounty papers drawn aud cortllled, will also take depositions to be rei.d lu m v court lu the United States, 7 10 ly . Oil AH. A. BARN ETT, Attorney-at-Law, New Bloom Held. Perry oo Pa iluOmce on high street. North side, unarly op poslletlin I'lesbylerlnu Church, 3 21 y ML. HOUETT, AttohneY-at-Law. Nowpori, Perry County. Pa. Having permanently located at Newport, will give prompt and caret tit attention to all busi uessinatters committed to his care. V Olllee, No. M'l Nort h Second Street. Newport, April if 1878 D R. 0. P. BOLLINGER, raysicytn ana isurgoon, jromneln residence on Main Struct, New Blonmhelil. Pa. CHRONIC DISEASES TREATED. 18 tf T SUNDY.M.D. U , riivslelnn aud Surgeon. A graduate of Cleveland Medical College. Located permanontlv In the borough of Bloom. Held. Oilers his professional services to the cltl r.ens of Bloomlleld and Mirroiiudlng. vicinity. Calls lu the country attended to prompily. Olllee lu the room formerly occupied by Dr. . li. Sweeney, lu tlie residence of II. W. Smith, Main street, New Bloomlleld, 1'a. 10 6m D K. B. M. ALEXANDER, SUJIOEOX DENTIST, New Bloomlleld, Perry County, Pa. -0ceon Main Street. South Side, nearly opposite t he residence of Win. McKee. Everything belonging to the nrofesslon done In the best muniier. evAi.L WoitK Wakhant Ei). Terms moderate. 28 W. R0WE. M. D. Physician and Burgeon Pcullnt. Olllee near Blxler'9 Mills, where all professional business will lie prompily at tended to. Dental work of all kinds warruulediu price and quality. May 25. '80. ly. 1882 HARPER'S YOUNG PEOPLE AN ILLUSTRATED WEEKLY 10 PAGES. SUITED TO TlOYSANnaiRIA OF FROM SIX TO SIXTEEN YEARS OF AUK. Vol. III. commences N y ember 1, 1881. NOW IS THE TIME TO SUBSCRIBE. The Youno Pkopi.b has been from the first sun. cessf ill beyond anticipation. N. Y. Evenlnu Pout. It lias a distinct purpose to which It steadily adheres that, namely, ol supplanting the vicious rapers for the young with a paper more attract ive, as well as more wholesome. jUo(on Jourticti. For neatnes, elegance of engraving, and con tents generally. It Is unsurpasseu by any publica tion of the kind yet brought to our notice. I'iUa burgh Uar.Hle. Its weekly visits are eagerly looked fnr, not only by the children, but also by parents who are anxious to proylile pure literature for their girls and boys VhrMlan Advocate, Buffalo, N. Y. A weekly paper for children which parents need not fear to let tlielr children read at the family fireside. IlartorU Dally Times. Just the paper to take the eve and secure the attention of Hie boys and girls. SjirintfJteKt Union. TERMS. HARPER'S YOUNG PEOPLE sl BO Per Year, Postage Prepaid, ( x ou Sinolb Nt-MiiEHS I'our Cents each. The Bound Volume for li will be ready early In November. Price 13 IK); postage prepaid. Cuver for Yodnci Pkoi'I.k for 1881, 36 ceuts; postage, li cents additional. Remittances shou'd tie made by Post Office Money Order or Draft, to avoid chance of loss. Newspapers are not to copy this advertisement without the express order of Uaki-kh & Bitoru Kits. Address HARPER & BROHERS, New York. We continue to act as Solicitors for Patents, Caveats, Trade Murks, Copyrights, etc., for the Uuluid SUiU-s, Canada, Cuba, England, France. Germany, etc We bavu hod tlilrty-ti vo years' experience. Patentsobtalned through us are noticed In theRcl CNTmo American. This large and splendid illus trated week ly paper, f 3 2 O a year.shows the Progresa of Science, is very interesting, uud has an enormous circulation. Address MUNN A CO., Patent Solici tors, Pub's, of eciKNTirio American, 87 Park Row, New York. Hand bonk about intonts free. JOR PRINTING of every description neatly and promptly executed at Reasonable Rates at the P'.oouiiieid Timet Steam Job Ottioe. PATENTS A TRUE TONIC w m Ft23 tT7 t mm - .. - ..wi.iwrt, .w"'rf;i,ffi. jmCTTnmrm 3 PURE TINTED GLOSS PAINT ! ioivr niakeexperlmi'iilson your bnllillngs with untried and unreliable amides at )our expense. JKyTS'T PAY for water and benzine 11.(0 to fi.lO per gallon. 10 JUJY the Lucas reliable aud guaranteed Tinted Gloss PAINTH. Clreularsand Sample Cards or Paint mailed on application . JOHN LUCAS & CO., 141 North Third Street, 13 6m Philadelphia, Pa. HARRISBUR9 TELEGRAPH FOIl iHH'2. THE WEKKLyTeLEOHAPH Is the Largest and Best Newspaper Published at the Capital of IVnnsvlv.inla, and contains the latest Home and Foreign News, Politics. Stories and Miscellaneous reading, Market and Stock re ports, etc., making It. a great paper for Ti e Fami ly, The Business House and the Work Shop. TKHUS FOB 1882: Single Stibmlptlnn '. $1 fit Clubs of 10 or more, per copy 1 00 And an extra copy to the person raising a club. Sample copies free. THE DAILtTxELEOHAPII Is the only Republican paper at the State Capi tal. It Is mailed, postpaid, for $7 per year, or at same rate for shorter term. All subscriptions are pavnlile In advance, nnd should be sent In registered letters.or postal money orders. Address, CIIA8. If. K KRONER, JIarrlsburg, 1'a. YOU CAN BUY THE BLATCHLEY PUPvflP thllnnfl,or wll n Copper, Porcelln,or Iron Lining.. Knch oue Mencllcd with my name as mamilai'turer is wnrrnnted In material and con ptructtun. For imlo by the bent Iioupcs in tlie trailo, If you do not know where to get this pump, write to me as bulow, and I will send name of agent nearest you, who will supply you at iny luwcat prices. CHAS. O. BLATCHLEY, Manufacturer, SOS Market St,, Philadelphia, Fa. W For sale by Y. Mortimer, Nesr Bloomlleld, Pa. 22 PATENTS. K. A. Lehmann, Solicitor of American and For eign Patents. Washington. 1). C. All business connected with Patents, whether before the Pat ent Olllee or the Courts, promptly attended to. No charge made unless a patent secured. Send for Clrculur. w. o. tf Patents for Inventions. . K. W. AN0E11SON. J, C. SMITH. ANDERSON & SMITH, Attorneys at Law, No. 700 Seventh Street, Washington, D. C. No fee for preliminary examination. No fee unless patent allowed. Fee less thau any other responsible agency. Books ot information sent free of charge. References furnished upon re quest. w. c. tf INVCNTfiRQ Address EPSON BROS., At III V Cil I Una tornevs at Law and Patent Solicitors, 617 Seventh Street, Washington, D. C for Inn ructions. Keasouahle terms. References and advice sent FREE. We attend exclusively to Patent business. Reissues, Interferences, and cases rejected in other hands a specialty. Caveats solicited. Upon receipt of model or sketch and description we give our opinion as to patentabil ity, fkeb of cuarub . Vre refer to the Commis sioner of Patents, also to Kx.Coinmlasioners Established 18t6. w. c. tf A Small Farm For Sale. A TRACT OF GOOD LAND, containing 13 Acrrs. having thereon erected, a OOD IIOCSE and BAh.N. Plenty of Fruit of all kinds and a Springof good water near the house. This Iiropeity issluated yt of a mile from Dunally's .tills. Perrv County, Pa., and 5 miles from the Pa. H. R. It is a good place for an Ore miner. Terms easy. Apnlv to JOHN BESRI.F.R, Dunually's Mills, Sep. 6, 1881. Perry Co.. Fa. ACY Goods and Notions, Borne new ar rivals, Cheap. , F. MORTIMER. wmsm . ... t 'il T. W U Ha Bet the Showman. The other day a show came to Little Hottk mid WW) shamefully lmjiosed upon by Uncle Isom. While Btantling near the tent lie sawfe crowd of low-iplrltetl boys grieving on account of financial (IcpreRfilun. " Does yer youngsters wauter go Inlef der showl"' he asked. The boys reknonded In uolsy chorous. " Well, come on, den, I usler be n chile myself, an' unlike mos' ob men, 1 hal n 't forgot li 1 1. Cou n t dose boys," he added, addressing the doorkeeper. The man began counting, and by the lime the boys had passed In, Isom was walking around, talking to acquaint ances from the plantations. " Here," said the showman, " give me twenty tickets." . "What forV Does yer think me a lottery agent 1"' You passed In twenty boys, and I want the tickets or the money." " I doan owe yer no tickets, an' I doan owe yer no money. I didn't tell yer ter pass de boys In. I said count 'em. 1'se always beard dat showmen Is good In 'ritbmatio an'I wanted to satisfy myself. Yer say dat dar wbs twenty boys. I doan 'spute yer word, case I ain't no niathmertlcian. B'poseu I take a lot ob boys ter der cashier ob a bank an' axes him ter count 'em' does dat signify dat de cashier Is gwlne ter pass 'em Inter de money room t No sah. Go back to yer tent, for I see a crowd goln' In." The showman, remembering that he had left the entrance unguarded, turned when Isom walked away with an agility rarely exhibited by an old man. Couldn't Recommend It. A tall lame negro has been In the habit for a year past of calling at a Mich Igan avenue grocery and begging a few potatoes, a bit of codfish or anything else likely to be given hrtn. The other day, , the grocer took a flour sack and mode up a mixture of sand, aud when the negro came around he was almost pulverized to hear the grocer say : ' "Now, Ham, If you won't come here again for three months you can shoulder that sack and take It home." "Am you In alrnest, boss V" " Yes. I mean what I say." " Wall I reckon I'd better cotcu on' to dat Ihance, an' may de Lawd bress you fur a hundred yars to come I" lie shouldered the sack and walked ofl" and was not seen again for three days. Then he entered the store with the remark : , "Bay, bogs, I don't mean to comeback only I want to ax a question." "Go ahead." "It's about dat flour you gin me. Ie ole woman an' me doan't lake the same view of It. I hold dat It am a new-way of grindln' up wheat, an' she says It am new process fur usin' up gravel banks. Kin you frow any light on de subject 1"' "It's a new brand of my own," replied the grocer. " The wheat was raised on sandy soil. Can you recommend it?" " N not 'zactly, sah, but if you could change wld me fur a peck cf beans raised on a hill side, an' put de ole trees an' stumps an' stones in one bag an' put de beans in anodere, it would save a heap o orgy men t in de family." 0He read In a newspaper paragraph the statement that " The child is father to the man," and straightway went and asked his mother if that was true ' "Yes, my son," she answered, "it may seem a little strange to you, but it is true." "Well, mamma," responded the in quisitive youth, "why la it if I'm papa's father that he always licks me and I never lick him ?" t3T"I say, Clem," cried two disputing darkies, appealing for decision to a sable umpire, which word is right dlzact y or dezoctly 'iV The sable monarch re flected for a moment, and then with a look of wisdom, said, " I can't tell prezactly." e"Why did you leave your boarding place ?" asked a lawyer of a dishonest witness in a burglar trial. " Because I couldn't take it with me," was the frank reply. UrSusan B. Anthony wants the Dame of the Pullman cars altered either to Pull-man-and-woman or Pull-lrrespect-ive-of-sex-cars. C2T"Thls apple is pretty well worn out," said a five-year-old, as she finished eating and was about to throw away the core. FacL 1 (3 Lydia E. Plnkham's Vegetable Compound has done thousands of women more good than the medicines of many doctors. It is a positive cure for all female complaints. Head to Mrs. Lydia . l'inkham. 49 -t f --; 'i