THE TIMES, NEW HL00MF1KL1), PA., MAllCIl II, 187U.
A Very Short Courtship.
T1l. GHAHAM liRvlng pnsRi'd a very
U oredltHble examination before the
Army Medical Hoard, waa ooiuiiiIrhIoiu
rd an assistant surgeon In the United
rune army in is , and ordered to re
lort for duty to the commanding otlleer
iit Fort M'Kavett, Texas.
There were no railroads In the west
ern country at Dint time and (lie usual
way of getting to Texas was by the
Mississippi river to New Orleans, and
(hen crossing the Gulf to stage It up
through the Ktate.
lit. Graham wbs very desirous of ex
amining he western country miner
alogtcally, st) applied and received per
mission from the War Department to
go by way of Arkansas and the Indian
Territory to his pout.
On his arrival at Ht. Louis he shipped
the greater part of his baggage by way
of the river, nnd taking only what he
could cany on horseback, started on his
Journey.
While In St. Louis, at the Mauler's
Hotel, ho formed tho acquaintance of a
gentleman who, learning where he was
K"lng, gave htm a letter of introduction
to his brother, who was a farmer living
on his route to Arkansas.
It Is not necessary for us to follow
Mm on his road, or tell what discover
ice he made In the Interest of science;
suniclent Ills that ono day,toward dusk,
tie reached the house of tho gentleman
to whom he had the letter, and dis
mounting, knocked at tho door and pre
sented Ms letter to the judge (even In
those lays every one was a Judge In
Arkansas), who would not have neeifcd
it to have accorded him an open-handed
welcome i for travelers were a God send
and news M as as much sought after then
an now.
After a short visit, he proposed to go
on to the next town, ul.out four miles
oir, where he Intended to put up for the
night. Thejudge would not listen to
bis leaving, and was so cordial In his
desire for him to slay that he would
have been rude not to have done so.
Thejudge, after directing one of the
servants to attend to his horse, invited
Mm Into the dining-room, where ho was
Introduced to the wife and daughter of
his host, and also to a substantial west
ern auppcr, to which he did ample jus-
After supper they adjourned to the
'larlor, and he entertained his new
made friends with the latest news from
outside world. The judge brewed some
stiff whisky punch, which Graham, so-
Ilned Inclined, Imbibed quite freely.
The old couple retired, and left their
daughter to entertain him ; and whether
it wag the punch, or what, at all events
lie made hot lovo to her, and Anally
asked her to be his wife and go to Texas
with him, to which she consented. Bhe
being very unsophisticated and Innocent,
took everything he said In downright
earnest, and with her it was a case of
"lovo at first sight."
Hut I am anticipating. During the
night our friend, the doctor, woke up,
and remembered what he had said, and
it worried Mm ; but he said to ' himself,
after emptying his water pitcher : -"
Never mind, I'll make It all right In
the morning. I must have made a fool
of myself. Bhe's lovely, but what must
he not think of me I" and rolled over
and went to sleep again.
Morning came, and upon his going
down to the parlor, he found the young
lady alone, for which he "blessed
Ms lucky Btars, and was just about to
make an apology, when she said :
I told mamma, and she said It was
nil right," at the same time giving him
a kiss which nearly took his breath
away. " Tapa is going to town this
morning, dear, and you ride in with
him and talk It over ; but he won't ob
ject, I know."
"But, my dear miss, I was very
foolish, and "
No, Indeed ; you were all right."
Well, I will go to my post, and re
turn fat you, for I must go on at
" No ; I can go with you."
" You won't have time."
" Oh, yes, I will. Papa will fix that.
It would be such an expense for you to
come back all the way here."
" But I have no way of taking you."
"JJjave thought of that; that does
aiot make any difference. Father will
: give us a team."
With 'iarly tears in his eyes he went
in to breakfast, to which at that mo
ment both were summoned; but, alas!
appetite he bad none. It was not that
(die was not pretty and nice; but he
thought what a confounded fool she
must be not to see that he wanted to get
out of It. But it was no use. When the
judge started for town, Dr. Graham was
sitting beside him. The judge saved
him the trouble of broaching the subject
by starting it himself:
" I always, y"oung man, give Nell her
own way; soH is all right; you need
not say a word."
" But I've got to go on to-day. "
Tho old judge turned his eyes toward
him. He had an Arkansas bowle in
each, and ono of thoso double-barrel
shot-gun looks as he said :
" You ain't trying to get out of It, are
you V"
The doctor, taking In tho situation,
said, promptly, all hope being gone :
"No, sir."
"That's right. 1 will tlx everything
for you give you that black team of
mine, and a light wagon to carry your
wife's things" (here the doctor shudder
ed) "nnd a thousand as a starter. You
can bo married to-night, and leave early
In the morning. That will suit, won't
it V"
" Yes, sir," answered Graham, faint
ly. Uuton the Judgo turning toward
him, he said, " yes, sir, certainly."
"After you get fixed at your post I'll
come down and pay you a visit. I have
been thinking about selling out and
moving to Texas for some time ; It's
gelling crowded here, and things are
n-niovlng as slow as 'lasses in winter
time." , Things were arranged as the old Judge
siild. Tho marrliigo took place, and the
army received un addition to lis ladles
In the person of (he Arkansas Judge's
daughter, and Dr. Graham has never
regretted tho obduracy of his fatbcr-ln-law,
or the unsophlHtlcatcdiiess of his
wife.
An Incident of tho Rebellion.
IT WAH General Gordon's command
which struck the flank of the Elev
enth corps on the afternoon of the first
day at Gettysburg, nnd after a short but
desperate conflict broke Its Hue and
swept It from the field.
In that fight General Barlow, of New
York, commander of the First division,
fell dangerously and, It was thought,
mortally wounded. He was shot di
rectly through the body. Two of his
men attempted to bear him through the
shower of lead from tho field ; but otic
was Instantly killed and General Bar
low magnanimously said to the other :
"You can do mo no good ; save your
self If you can."
Gordon's brigade of Georgians in its
wild charge swept over him, and ho
was found by General Gordon himself,
lying with upturned face in the hot
July sun, nearly paralyzed and apparent
ly dying. General Gordon dismounted
from his horse, gave him a drink of
water from his canteen, and inquired of
Gen. Barlow his name and wishes.
General Barlow said :
"I shall probably live but a short
time. Please take from my breast pock
et the packet of my wife's letters and
read one of them to me," which was
done. He then asked that the others be
torn up, as he did not wish them to fall
into other hands. This General Gordon
did, and then asked :
" Can I do anything else for you, Gen
eral V"
" Yes," replied General Barlow, earn
estly. " My wife is behind our army.
Can you send a message through the
lines 'i"'
"Certainly I will," said Gordon, and
ha did. Then directing General Barlow
to be borne to the shade of a tree at the
rear, he rode on with his command.
The wife received the message and came
harmlessly through both lines of battle
and found her husband who eventually
recovered.
Blnce General Gordon's election to
the United States Senate both he and
General Barlow were Invited to a din
ner party in Washington, and occupied
opposite seats at the table. After Intro
ductions, General Gordon said : .
" General Barlow, are you related to
the officer of your name who was killed
at Gettysburg V"
" I am the man," said Barlow. " Are
you related to the man who la supposed
to have killed me V"
" I am the man," said General Gor
don. The hearty' greeting which fol
lowed the touching story, as related to
the Interested guests by General Bar
low, and the thrilling effect upon the
company, can better be Imagined than
described.
Damage Done by a Worthless Dog.
The Cleveland Leader Bays : The re
port of a singular occurrence comes from
Brecksville. About a fortnight ago Mr.
Ritchie, a farmer living in Brecksville
township, discovered, on going out one
morning, that something extraordinary
had taken possession of his flock of
sheep (six in number). They were froth
ing at the mouth and biting viciously at
one another, and tearing the wool from
their own hips and sides. Nearly all
bore marks of violence as if they had
been attacked by some wild animal, and
their wool was bespattered with blood.
Mr. Ritchie, becoming alarmed and
scarcely knowing how to act.drove them
all Into a pen and locked them up. Their
malady increased, and one by one they
all died. At the same time another
farmer by the name of Burr, a neighbor
of Mr. Itltchie, passed through a similar
experience. He had four sheep, and all
were taken with, the same malady, dying
in, the course of a day or two. These also
bore marks of bites and scratches. The
general Impression arrived at after con
sultation was that the flocks m been
attacked by a mad dog, and that hydro
phobia had caused their death.
Now thoroughly aroused, tho two fain
Hies set out a day or two ago and made a
careful examination of the ground where
the sheep had been pasturing. In one
place In the field they found unmlstak
able signs of a struggle, and,alded by the
snow they tracked the foot-prlnls of a
dog to a distance of two miles. Here
they came to the house of a laboring
man, and found the cause of all the
trouble to be a worthless, starved look
ing cur, that barked and snarled as they
approached. They carried guns, and It
took but n minute or two to send a
couple of bullets through the dog's car
cass. It may be here staled 'that tho sheep
have all been buried and that (lie steer
will probably be killed, so that there Is
no danger of any of the meat being
brought Into the markets. The matter
has been Investigated by Dr. Stuart,
veterinary surgeon, and by Mm reported
to the health officer.
A Man with a Wonk Stomach.
TJIHRKcameto the dlnner-luhlo at
the Lawrenco House the other day
two strangers, one a lean and hungry
looking customer, the either a decent
appearing young fellow. As they reach
ed tho table the other man clutched
frantically ut the bill of fare, and re
marked as follows :
"Let's see what they've got. You
know I can't eat everything. Been
nearly dead for ten weeks with dyspep
sia. Ah, oyster soup, guess that won't
hurt me. Waiter, bring me some oyster
soup, and, let's see, boiled while fish,
yes, I'll Just try a little o' that, too."
The soup and fish were devoured with
terrific voracity und with ull the exter
nal evidences of Intense relish.
" Now, let's see what else they've got,
you know I've got to be mighty careful
what I eat ; It's awful annoying, I can
tell you, to be limited this sort of away.
Itoast turkey well, now, that ought'nt
to hurt me; glinino some. Boast beef
I think that's safe enough; I'll have
some. And, hello, chicken pot-pie,
that's easily digested ; waiter, you may
fetch me some of that, please. Let's
see, now, I've got to be so confounded
careful I guess you needn't fetch any
thing else but a piece of boiled ham, a
little maccaronl, and some chicken
livers and vegetables. If you have any
chow-chow and pickled cucumbers you
may fetch some to whet up my appetite
a little."
The waiter took the order, and the
man with tho weak stomach reached
this way for crackers, that way for
butter, here took a piece of bread, there
a mango nnd a stalk of celery, a nd fre
fjuently remarking that it was bad to be
restricted this way, stayed Ms stomach
till his dinner was brought. He looked
It over, sent the waiter back for some
roast veal and another onion, remarking
that his stomach was weak, he had
been Buffering terribly from dyspepsia,
and couldn't eat everything and not
much of anything, but at lust got to
work and cleared the dishes.
The matter of dessert troubled him
some because his stomach was so weak,
but he finally ordered mince pine, plum
pudding and Ice cream, with a cup of
coll'ee, not too weak.
They were brought and devoured, and
then he called the waiter and made her
a confidential communication to the
efiect that he had been sick with dys
pepsia, that his stomach was weak, he
couldn't eat everything, and would she
be kind enough to bring him a bowl of
milkV
The milk was brought ; he crumbled
some bread therein, and, as his younger
companion had departed, the man with
the weak stomach remarked to the gen
tleman across the table from him that
It was darned rough to have to come
down to bread and milk, but he had
been sick, he couldn't eat overythlng
and he had to be very careful.
Persecuted Lovers.
A MOST laughable trick peqwlrated
upon a young man of Fremont has
just come out. He is a tip-top fellow,
high minded and honorable, but he is
not blessed with a very large share of
this world's goods. He is In love with
a very pretty girl, who In turn would
go through fire for him.
Her parents have done everything
they could to annoy the young man
and prevent hlui from eomlng to the
house, but he is persistent, and the high
spirited girl says if be can't come to see
her, she will go to see him and stay fort
good. As, unfortunately often hapiiens,
there Is a boy in the family who sympa
thizes with the parents. This imp has
succeeded at lust in, carrying the day
agaiust the lovers. The young man
called, a few evenings since, when the
old folks were away from home, hoping
to pass a pleasant evening.
It was not long until the parlor stove
commenced smoking violently. The
stove was doctored but It grew wotse.
In a few minutes the smoke became
unendurable, and the couple took refuge
In the family room. They were not more
than comfortably seated before they
were treated to a repotltlon of the smoke
In the parlor. It fairly poured out of
t lie fireplace, and soon the room was so
full of smoke that, had the couple not
retreated, they would liavo been convert-'
od Into good cured bacon. The lovers,
determined not to lie undone, went to
the kitchen. Here tho same fate await
ed them.
It seemed as If the very elements con
spired against Ibeni, The fire burned
brightly at first, but In a few minutes,
the giant black volumes came puffing
out of the room, They were In despair.
Wherever they went the smoke follow
ed them. They were literally smoked out.
The young lady, half In anger and half
from tho blinding smoke, had a hearty
cry, and tho young man went home.
It has si nee been learned that tho ras
cally boy had secured some broad boards
and climbed up on tho roof and laid
them over the chimneys.
A Woman's Unpleasant Predicament.
WHKNllie train on tho Erie road
arrived at Lnckawaxen, one day
last week, a handsome young lady, car
rying several bundles in her baud, en
tered the car and took a seat. It being
the last car on the train, It wan some
time before the conductor, Van Wornier,
came ulong to gather the tickets. When
he approached the young lady, she
handed him a ticket for Honesdale, over
tho Honesdale branch, only to be In
formed tliut she was on the wrong train,
and, Instead of going to Honesdale, was
rapidly approaching Narrowsburg. The
conductor passed on, and the lady Im
mediately burst Into a flood of tears, and
wished to know wliot she could do. A
passenger, taking compassion on the
young lady, who was crying as if
her heart would break, endeavored to
make light of her misfortune. But they
didn't console her at all. Slie had to be
at Honesdale at 8 P. M., and If she
couldn't get there by that time she did
not want to go at all. In fact she was
to be married at that hour, and had run
down to Luckawaxen to procure a few
articles she required. If she didn't get
back she was afraid her soon-to-be hus
band would be offended, to say nothing
of the dlsapolntuieut and anxiety It
would cause her parents and the Invited
guests.
Her fellow passenger was now more
Interested In the weeping young lady,
and, as he says himself, would have giv
en $10 had It been In his power to waft
her back to Honesdale and her lover.
He Immediately Interviewed Conductor
Van Wormer, told him of the young
woman's plight and asked him If it
wasn't possible to get her back to Hones
dale, In time for the wedding ceremony.
The conductor said he would try, and
did try, and succeeded. He procured
her a passage back from Narrowsburg to
Lackawaxen on a freight train, which
fortunately happened to be standing at
the depot, and telegraphed to the agent
at Lackawaxen to have a horse and
sleigh in reudlness to convey her to
Honesdale. Everything worked well,
and the young lady reached her destina
tion in time for her marriage vows. Bhe
will never forget the kindness of that
conductor.
A Joker Caught.
One day last week a tramp entered a
Hollldaysburg hotel and asked for a
meal, when the landlord, playing smart,
directed the nomad to a friend in the
bar-room, who Is Irritable, saying,
" That's the landlord." Tramp did as
told, and asked the supposed landlord
for something to eat, when he, Instead
of exploding, took the "traveler" into
the dining-room and served him sump
tuously. The landlord has concluded
that jokes on regular boarders don't
iy.
Interesting Perhaps to Lawyers.
A very good story is told of the late
Judge Cadwalader who died In Philadel
phia a few weeks ago. He had a weal
thy brother who for a long time took a
commanding position In the business in
terests of Philadelphia. While thejudge
was seated on the bench of the supreme
court one day this brother appeared and
in his bluff fraternal way said : " How
are you, John. I have been summoned
to act as grand juror." Said the Judge :
" When I am on the bench I am ad
dressed as judge." " Don't be a d d
fool, John," said the business man.
" Fine Mr. Cadawalader $100," said the
judge, and fined he was.
Shrewdness and Ability.
Hop Bitters so freely advertised in all
the papers, secular and religious, are
having a large sale, and are supplanting
all other medicines. There U uo deny
ing the virtues of the Hop plant, and
the proprietors of these Bitters have
shown great shrewdness and abill ty in
compounding a Bitters, w hose virtues
are so palpable to every one's observa
tion. Exchange, io
Bit. WH1TTIEU,
No. 1)03 Ponn Htroet, Pittsburgh, Pa.,
Continues to afford reliable special treatment nf
rrlrntn nnd Urinary Uiwsnrs. lerleet imre
Knaraiitenl. Spermatorrhoea or Seminal Weak.
li(K rwmilinid li iim self ahue or scmml menus,
nriHltinliiK nervou debility, hlcht emission, !e.
auoiidniiny, dllni-, dlu'ine ol nliclit, pimple
1. .',4'B: wnkniM ul mind mid body, nnd
finally ImiioteiKiy, of Hexual power, sliirlllty,
el.,iinMUl!iK the yiiiilm for marriage or biiUm
aiidutiidnrliin Nf miserable, are permanently
y'!rm' "''"rlsit imimIIiIb time. (Jotiorrhea.
(Meet, Htrlnttires, all Urinary flleae and Hyphl
II. (all form, coul Ilia of Hkln Eruption. HU
cer In Urn iiimilh. throat, or on other rof Hi
body, are piirfe.-tly cured, and thtt blood poison
U!V.r,.".!(,,'..,!r'll",,,ml 'rmn system" 1'H.
I-".,1 , ' F" l '"H'llsr Kradiiate of medicine, a
hi diploma at oniee snow hi llfo Ion speolnl
Mimrlimm In all private dlea, with potent
in die ne prepared liy lilmiHf, enable 1,1 hi to
oiiredlmc!iiltea after other fall It self. evi
dent that a phyilidiui tresllnij tliou'sml ol cae
every year aiiilre reat nil III. 'Jim etnbllnh
menl Is central and mitred, aud o arranged that
patients see the doctor duly. Consultation anil
iirreiNiiidciice private nnd free. i'Kiiulilnieut
Scaled for slump. Modlnlnes sent mil y where.
lloiii-miA. M.lo4 I'. M.. and (IK M., to SI'.M.
Hiindava from lo A. M., to 1 P. M. Kverybodv
should read the
MAKHIAUK AND HEALTH UVIDK,
Ui panes, flnn lllintratlon. nrlee 20 rent. A
hook for prlvln, careful r.ndlim by both aexen,
married or ulnifln, explalnlnu wonder and my.
terle or aemml yHlninf reproduction, niarrlBun
Impedimenta, etc.. cniie, uneiieine and cure.
Hold atollleeorby mall, sent aeciirnly sealed, on
renelptoi prlen In money or notiiK "tamp. Ad.
(Ire lilt. viirn iKK, Wjl J ena Ht.. IMtl.
biirxh.l-a. W401y
J. M. Oiiivin. j. (imviii.
J.M.0IRVIN&S0N.,
FLOUR, GRAIN, SEED & PRODUCE
CoiiiiiiiNKloii Mercliaiils,
No. (14 Nontli ;ht, Ht.,
BALTIMORE, MD.
.w." w.in 'mr Mr,'f sttentlnn to the aaln of all
kind of Country l'rodnoe and remit the amount
promptly. 4filvr.
J. M. OlRVIN & BON.
EAVAIllllNfl'St
(IS70 Uniform (,'opvrlKhted 1R77)
The Latest and I'.eit. A Oreat Improrement a
want aiioplled. Wo fiinilnh low and whatever
you need.
Law niiilCoiiiiiierclul Supplies or all Kinds.
- Send for sample and pries 111 of what
you want.
- ( ul ul ir ne of Jllank furnished at THIS
OKKICK, ordlreet from the publisher.
K. WAKING, Tyrone, Ta.
N
KW WAGON SHOP.
THE underftlKtied hiring opened a
WHEELWRIGHT SHOP,
in
NEW BLOOMFIELL),
are now prepared todo any kind of work In their
llne.ln auylyl, at iirlee which cannot tall to
give at(faellou. Carriage of all styles built
und all work will be warranted.
BTODFFKB ft CKI8T.
NewBloomtleld. April 1,17.
ivr
USSER & ALLEN
CENTRAL STORE
NEWPORT, PENN'A.
Now offer the public
A HAKK AND EI.HOANT A8HOHTMENT Of
DRESS GOODS
Consisting ( all shades suitable for the season.
BLACK ALPACCAS
AND
Mourning Goods
A SPECIALITY.
BLEACHED AND UNBLEACHED
MUSLINS,
AT VARIOUS PRICES.
AN ENDLESS SELECTION OF PRINTS!
We sell and do keep good quality of
SUGARS, COFFEES & SYRUPS,
And ererythlng under the head of
GROCERIES !
Machine needles and oil for all makes o
MachlBus.
To be convinced that our oods are
CHEAP AS THE CHEAPEST,
IS TO CALL AND EXAMINE STOCK.
No trouble to show good.
Don't forget the
CENTRAL STORE,
Newport, Perry Comity, Pa.
, WHEN FEVER AMD AGCE.
MALARIA, AND ALL KEVEKSCAN BE
ClitED
FOIt SO CENTS,
I( is criminal to suffer. As absolute means of
cure la found la'
SHOMS
INFALLIABLE AGUE PILLS.
THIS specific cures not only Chill and Fe
vers, butervry form of Malarial taint from
Aching bones to the Sliake There U no mistake
about it. It you rac tho riht article.
KKinemberthe nam MHOI.I.'H AGUE PI1I.S.
Bemberthe price fl FT V CKNT&
It your druit has none. I will send them by
mail ou receipt of 5i cent, or I will send a box
free to any peroun not able to pay for them.
Address JOstfU KHOLL. Burlington, New
Jersey. G