7
Professional Cnrds.
'
JK. JUNKIN, Attorney t-T.w,
, New Bloomtleld, Perryco., Pa.
-Office Next door to the residence of Judge
Jiinkin. fttl
AM. MARKKI., Attorney-at-I.aw,
. New Bloomlleld, Perry county, Pa.
Ofllce directly opposite the Pott-OOlce,
nd adjoining the Mansion House.
T EW19 l'OTTElt,
AT'l'OltNEY AT UW,
NEW BLOOMFIELD, PERRY Cl.,rA.
-Claim promptly secured collected
Wrltlngsandall leal business carefully attend
ed to. " y'
TAMES II. FEUOI18ON, Mtffi$yfiw ) A.
rome Market Street, near the Square. 856
CHARLES M. SMILEY, Attorney at Law.
New HloonitleUl, Perry Co. Pa.
VOItlcewith 0. A. Barnett, Esq., on High
Street, north side, nearly opposite the f "Mbyte
rlaa Church. August 20, 187J.
11TM A.8PONSI.ER, Attorney-at-lJlw,
W Office adjoining his residence, on East
Main street, New Bloomneld, Pen j jjo.. Pa 88 ly
JOHN (J. 8IIATTO, Burgeon Dentist .
New Bloomtleld, Perryco., Pa.
All kinds of Mechanical and Surgical Dentistry
done In the beat maimer, and at reasonable
'''ivonice at his residence one door Eastofths
Robinson House, and opposite Wm. A. Sponsler I
Law olllce. . "'J
WM. N. 8EIBF.KT, Attorney-at-I.aw,
New Bloomlleld, Perryco.. Fa.
Blootulleld, 3 33 lv.
V ATTORN EY-AT-I. AW,
New Bloomlleld, Porryco., Pa.
WOmce Two doors West of E. Mortimer,
Store 3 7 ly
LEWIS POTTER, notakt PUBLIC, New Bloom.
Held, Perry Co., Pa.
Deeds, Bonds, Mortgages and Leases carefully
prepared and acknowledgement a t aken. All
kinds ot Pension and Bounty paper drawn and
certified, will also take depositions to bo rer.d In
any court In the United States. 7101y
CHAS.J.T, McINTIRE, Attorney-at-Law,
New Bloomlleld, Perryco., Pa.
All professional business promptlyandfalth
fully attended to. 3 2 lv.
WM. A. MORRISON,
JUSTICE OK TH E PEACE and OENERAL
COLLECTOR, NewGehmantown, Perryco., Pa.
a-Remlttanceswillbe made promptly for all
Collections made.
CHA8. A. BARNETT, Attorney-at-Law,
New Bloomlleld.Perryco.,Pa
H.Offlce on high street, North side, nearly op
fiosite the Presbyterian Church. 3 2 ly
DICHARD L. MAGEE,
JUSTICE OF THE PEACE,
Office at hlsesldence. in CENTRE TOWN
SHIP. Perry County, Penn'a., one mile South of
New Bloointleld. 108
w
ILLIAM M. 8UTCH,
Justice ol" Hie lea'c.
AND GENERAL COLLECTOR,
New Bloorafleld, Perry County, Penn'a
-8peclalattentlon paid to Collections of all
kinds. Deeds, Bonds, Mortgages and Agreements
neatly executed. 716tf
QEORGE H. MARTIN
GENERAL AGENT.
BLAIX, PEltHY COUNTY, PA.
Special attention given to the collection of
claims, and any other business entrusted to him
will receive prompt attention. Charges moderate.
April. 19th, 1877.
T-EATHER C.
THE subscriber has now on hand at
LOW PRICKS,
Good Sole Leather,
Jvip of Superior Quality,
Country Calf Skins,
French Calf,
LININGS, ROANS, &c.
F. Mortimer,
NEW BLOOMFIELD, FA.
JUST OPENED
A VA11IETY STOKE,
TJ1? TOAVN!
We Invite the Citizens of BLOOMFIELD and
vicinity, to call and examine our Stock of
OBOOKKIEK, ,H!EENSWARE. CLASSWARE,
UN WAKE, A FULL VARIETY OK
NO'ilONS, &c, &C, &c,
.Ml of which we are selling at astonishingly
2-.OW PRICES.
f'.lve Ms a call and NAVE MONEY, as we
re almost tilVINU THIMiS AW A.
. lintter and Eggs taken In trade.
VALENTINE BLANK,
:'.s ly West Main Street.
VALUABLE STORE ST AM
At Private Sole'
jrsAttK subscriber offers at private Kale about.
1. ONE ACRE OF HROUND, having theraou
.rected a LAHOE IKiUSE. with KITCHEN.
VAH HOUSE and STABLE, and a WELL of
imort water near the door. .,...
' There Is a large STOKE ROOM In the
"building lu which a stole lias been kept for a
'umber of fears. The stand a very desirable
"'There In alo ereeted on the premises, another
HOUSE AND STABLE, which will be sold se
uratelv or with the Store Stand, to suit purchas
ers These prnimnles are located in a good com
munltv, with Schools and Churches oouveuient.
AVull itit nr M.ldl'HfcH
8. L. HOLLENBAUGH,
A ug. 21, '77 pd Sandy Hill, Perry Co ., Pa.
ACAllD. To all who are suffering from the
errors aud Indlseretlous of youth, nervous
weakness, early decay, loss of manhood, &o., I
will end.a rec'pe that will cure you. PRE It OF
CH AllOE. This great remedy was discovered by
a missionary In South America. Bend a self-addressed
enveloiie to the Rev. Joskpk T. Inmak,
.Mf tJcn P, BMt llvioe, A"etc York City . ltlb ly
Newport Advertisements.
JONES' BROS, & CO., .
(Formerly John Jones & Sou,)
Grain & Produce
MERCHANTS,
Brlok Warehouse, Front St., above Market,
Newport, Perry County, Pa.
WE Would respectfully Invite the patronage of
the farmers, and the pulilio generally, as
the IllOIIKHT PRICES the market will allord.
will be paid for all kinds of
OHAIN,
r'LOUK,
PRODUCE.
SEEDS AND
RAILROAD TIES
We have constantly on hand.
FISH,
SALT.
PLASTER,
CEMENT
COAL.
IRON,
STEEL,
HORSE SHOES, &c, &c.
FOR SALE AT THE LOWEST RATES.
Orders promptly tilled,
Newport, July 20, 1875 tf
N
EWPORT DRUG STORE.
Harlmr on hand a complete assortment of the fol
lowing articles, the subscriber asks a share or your
patronage.
lh'iiffa and Medicines,
CHEMICALS OF ALL KINDS.
Also a full stoek of
Concentrated Remedies,
ESSENTIAL OILS.
Brushes, Perfumery
haih on.,
AND
FAtfCl' ARTICLES.
Also always on Hand,
PURE WINES & LIQUOR
FOR
MEDICINAL and SACRAMENTAL
PURPOSES
j 3j
PHYS1CIAXS ORDERS
Carefully and Promptly Filled
B . M . EBY,
Newport, Penn'a.
J B. HARTZELL,
Wholesale Tobacco Dealer,
NEWPORT. PA.
Sole Agent for Lorllard's Superior Tobaccos,
Country Merchants supplied with Goods
at Philadelphia prices.
W Your orders are solicited. 9 41
w.
11, S. COOK & CO.,
Agree to sell all kinds ot
LUMBER AND SHINGLES,
for LESS MONEY than any other dealers in this
county. Wewlllalso take good Timber on the
stump or delivered at our Mill In exchange for
Lumber, &c. We use Ciearlleld Pine and Hem
lock only.
W. R. 8. COOK & CO.,
Newport, Terry Co., Pa.
October 10, 1876.
American and Foreign Patents.
GILMORE & CO.. Successors to CHIPM AN,
HOSMER & CO., Solicitors. Patents pii
cured in all countries. NO FEES IN ADVANCE.
No charge unless thepatent is granted. No fees
for making preliminary examinations. No addi
tional fees for obtaining and conducting a re
hearing. By a recent decision ot the Commis
sioner, ALL rejected applications may be revived.
Siecial attention given to Interference Cases be
fore the Patent oftice, Extensions before Con
gress, Infringement Suits In dllferent States, and
all litigation appertaining to Inventions or Pat
ents. Send Stamp to (jtlmore & Co., for pamph
let of slxly pages.
LAND CASES, LAND WARRANTS & SCRIP.
Contested Land Cases prosecuted before the U.
S. General Land Olllce and Department of the
Interior. Private Land Claims, MINING and
PRE EMPTION Claims, and HOMESTEAD cases
attended to. Land Scrip in 40, 80, any lo acre
pieces for sale. This Scrip Is assignable, and can
he located In the name of the purchaser upon any
Government land subject to private entry, at
$1.25 per acre, ltts of equal value with Hounty
Land Warrants. Send Stamp to Gilmore & Co.,
for pamphlet of Instruction.
AkHEAKS OK PAY AND BOUNTY.
OFFICERS, SOLDIERS and SAILORS of the
late war. or their heirs, are In many case sentitled
to money from the Government of which they
have no knowledge. Write lull history of service,
and state amount of pay and bounty received.
Enclose stamp to G I LMOR E & CO., and a lull re
ply, after examinat ion, will be given you free.
PENSIONS,
All OFFICERS. SOLDIERS, and SAILORS,
wounded, ruptured, or Injured lu the lttte. war,
however slight , can obtain a penson by addressing
GILMORE & CO.
Cases proi-ecuted by GILMORE CO., before
the Supreme Court of the United States, the Court
ol Claims and the Southern Claims Commission,
Each department of our business Is conducted
In a separate bureau, under charge of the same
experienced parties. mbloved by the old firm.
Prompt attenMou to all business entrusted to
Gl LMOR Et CO., Is thus secured. We desire to
win success by deserving it.
Address: GILMOKE&CO.,
629 F. Street.
Washington, D. C.
IMPORTANT NOTICK. The subscriber
late of the Arm of Rhoades tt Smith, would
respectfully inform the citizens of BLA1N
and vlclnitv, that he has opened a WAGON
MAKER-SHOP, and la prepared to make new
wagons and repair old ones at short notice, and
at from TEN to TWENTY percent, cheaper thau
the old him.
Ajrulveiueacall. Satisfaction guaranteed.
JACOB BM11U.
Blaln, August S.186T.
THE WEED
PRICES REDUCED.
"The Family Favorite"
IMPltOVEI)
Lilit-ltuiiiiliio;, Noiseless,
No tears,No Cams,No Springs.
New mid Elegant Styles or Wood
Work. From this date, by the expiration
of Patents under which we
have been paying roy
alties,wo are enabled
to sell our ma
chines at
GREATLY REDUCED PRICES,
and as low as those of any first
class machine.
IfeS Send for Circulars and
Price Lists.
Weed Sewing Machine Co.,
2G Union Square,
NEW YORK.
11 7 ISt.
BOOTS
' Do you want BOOTS of any kludf
If so, call and see the
LAltGK STOCK
i
j. HOW OFFERED BT
F . M O It T 1 M K II ,
Dr.A.G.OLIN'Slt.ig
II DUevM of Private nil tire, reiultlitir from early abuse
or Infection of iiher Set. Mrminal Wpnknpn prwlutliig
KmlMlontt, Lom of Memory, Impaired lht. Loi
Manhood or lmpoteney, Nervous IK-hlllty, fwnnf
nrnUyciirt.il aiuiMol tbrt II I udder, Kidney, 1,1 er
l,un-, AtliniK, i'dtttrh. HI, !1 C'hronlr I'UefcMu, ami IK
KAnRH OF r EM AI.Kf. to lib treittment. l.UIIrt
hni hid a Ufe-lonr exieriflncet and cum when othm fall. 1U
l a fraduaM of th Rafonnad Ki rmnl, ute no mtrrurv, hat tha
lirwl prartliw in the U. B. I.AOIF. n?otilrln Imitinent with
private horns nnd board, ml) iv rlt. Eiery convnirn' for
patltnu. 8nd Htly mnU for nnirtla of Rubber (ioorit and Hr
rular of Itnrxitunt Informalinn by ttfreu. alii.
FBmnh! nils Sper Box, Cnnitlutlon fret,
MARRIAGE GUIDE WJWfi
vitung and miditla ii of both heiw, on all di of (rival
natiira. Valunhla advli-c to the married and iUott rantamplall'i
mamac. How to IV healthy nnd truly h ippy In the ninrHed rela
tion, fcvm-uuly ihould fit this book. iVtua 60 wuu, to any ad
rata, taaitfd.
A PHYSIOLOGICAL
View of Marriage !
liumatTo weaiocK ana
iifilitltiitial 1 rt-atUa on tha
Uiiieit ut mnrriaer and thu
caiiM'-Hilint mi lit tor It; the if -creu
of Krproductlon and
i he Dlsoaae of Womtu.
A bonk lor private-, romid-
ti reading- WJ paget, prica
On nil ditordrmot a private jSi1re aniu tam Self
Abuae, xceaea, or Secret Xje,iiie, uli tlm btat
UteuiiK.of rnrp. !W4 iirre natf", p Itx.Mtct".
A CLINICAL LFCrTJHE on the atmrr- diietiee ind
fhoi of tho Throat a nd Lunpa, Catarrh, Eupture, Ui
Opium Habit, sc., price llj (Ms.
hither book nmt puttpuidoii n-ctipt ot price i or all three,
containing .(Xl jinp , ! autifuli) iluitra(itl, tur fit,
Addraaa Da IHJTl'8, No. li N. U bt. St. Louia,. K
I fiVFRQnooK OK KNOWI.EDGK, or Se
IU tno crets of Love. Courtship and
Marriage Showing how to get married, live hap
pily obtain health, wealth aud distinction, and
aiuvear to ailvantaK in sotHety 2l'0 panes Jod-.OOO
sold. Mailed tor lUfts., In FHtace tsianuis or cur
renev. Address, THK VNION TLBLISHINU
VUMPAM Y. ewark, N. J. 44wl3.
E.
VAHHINi'
(1876 Uniform Copyrighted 1877)
The Latest and Bet. A Great Improvement a
want Hiuiplied. We furnish low uud whatever
you need.
Law and Commercial Siii)lle f all HIriIs.
W tnd for samples and price lists of what
you want.
CatslKiiea of Blanks furnished at THIrt
OKFIC'K, ordirect from tli publisher.
K. WAKlMi, Tyrone, Pa.
J A OIK addicted to the habit of Intern
i perance are Invited to Keek inloi mntion at a
private home, where meilieal attendance and all
comforts are provided. For Information address
Mrs. W.H. NICIIOI.MIN. Box 2,712. fhlladelpiu.
November, 13, 1877.
ITWHirinii" Tw.jl.wiji.
. i. ..ym.V.IKIIlIlDlR.
Mil." ib" Family rAi&ITI" ul
rLJ.WLI. fW. IU( LU . UI4
f-. ijk T.'.
ilbkW KlMi I i " WrtBvMt.
"BOUIII't OltNRB." p-jl.WL..
'..rTTkil. M. W mmm b. to
W. O.I. n H, M .I Trmtm M bi
aiffiiiLiB uwL'jak a. a. s
ISOLD riATKDWATCBKK. CtimpMt
tioih, kaa w-ld. aampU waichrrt to
fllmls. AUdrtM, X. Cou una Chlean.
Hew Model lacliine
$2
Hotels.
HE MANSION HOUSE,
New IMoomllclil, Penn'a.,
D. M. RINKSMITH, . . proprHtor.
This well. known hotel lias Intel v beeiienlarced,
re-painted and re lllted. Ilest aceommodntronn
afforded. " Carefiri hostlers alwavsln attend
anoe. 9;wt
A UCTIONEERS.
JAS. F LATCH FORD,
A UUTIONEElt ,
Would respectfully Inform the public that he
will cry sales at reasonable prices. All orders
will receive promnt attention.
DUNN ALLY'S MILLS I'EHRT CO., PA.
TAMES CLEELAND '
U Auctioneer,
Offers his services to the citizens of Perry and
Cumberland counties, post ottlee address,
Hherniansdale, Perryco.. Pa.
W.D
. HENRY,
A UCTIOXEEH.
BlalD, Perry county Pa.
-Terms Moderate and every exertion made
to render satisfaction. Bit
Auctioneer. The undersigned gives
notice that he will erysales at any point In Perry
or IMuplilu comities. Orders are solicited aud
promptattentlon wlllbe given.
K. I). WKM.S,
New Buffalo
Perrvc.o.,Pa.
Q B. HARNISH,
ATJCTIO1NI01CH,
Delville. Perry Co., Pa. Chnrges moderate, and
satisfaction guaranteed. 6 tf
H
OME MANUFACTURE.
LOOK OUT!
I would respectively Inform myfrlendsthat I In
tend calling upon them vltha aupplyol good
of my
OWN MANUFACTURE.
Consisting of
CASSIMERS.
CA8SINETS.
FLANNELS, (Plalnandbar'd)
CAHPETS, Are.,
toexchangefor woo or sel If or cash.
3. M, BIXI.ER.
Centre Wootas Kit Ttmt . 6,17,4m
0W For Sale by F. MoitTiMBn.New Uloomlleld
Perry county, Pa.
S2500
4YRAn. AfrcBtitwanted; Busl-
M WiirltltlutlM fMlnl,li,vfr0.
Addrail J WORTH C . 81 UjuIi, U,,
$45
PltEMlUM WATrii tun niiri-a
Mnin wIiider.Frei'V i hevery order. Out
Hi free. J. I). Oaylord ft Co., Llilcugo, 111.
VIOK'B
ILLUSTRATED M0ATHLY MAGAZINE.
Each Number contains Thirty-two. Fages of
reading, many tine Wood Cut Illustrations, and
one Colored Plate. A beautiful Oardeu Maga
zine, printed on elegant paper, and full of infor
mation. In English and Uecinan. Price, $1.25 a
year. Five copies MH
Vlck's Flower and Vegetable (Jardeu. fO cents
In paper covers; In elegant cloth covers ll.Oo.
Vick's Catalogue. lino Illustrations, only 3 cts.
Address, J AMES VICK, Hoohestcr, N. V.
VIOK'8
ILLUSTRATED PR1CID CAFALOUUE.
Seventy live pages 300 Illustrations, with De
scriptions of thousands of the best Flowers and
Vegetables in the world, and the way to crow
them all tor a two cent postage stamp. Printed
In English and (lerman.
Viok's Flower and Vegetable Ranlen, 60 cents
in paper covers; inelegant cloth covers. (I. Oil.
' Vlek'S Illustrated Monthly Magazine 31! pages,
line illustrations, and colored plate in ever num
ber. Price, tl.iln a vear. Five copies fur ".
Address, JAMES V1CK, Rochester, IS. V.
FL&WER AND TEETADLE HARDEN
Is the most beautiful work of the kind In the
world. It contains about lfiO pages, hundreds of
fluu Illustrations, and six Chrouio Plates of
Flowers, beautifully drawn and colored trom na
ture. Pries AO cents In paper covers: tloo in ele
gant oloth. Printed in German and English.
Viok's Illustrated Monthly Magazine 'M pages,
Hue lllvstratlons.and Colored Plate in every num
ber. Price of ll.ita. Five copies for V
Vlek' Catalogue 300 Illustrations, only 2 cts.
Address, JAMES V1CK, Hochester, N. Y.
VIOK'S
FLOWER AN1 VEGETABLE SEEDS
are planted by a million people In America. See
Vick's Catalogue 300 illustrations, only 2 cts.
Vlck's Illustrated) Monthly Magazine 3'2 pages
tine Illustrations, and Colored Plat In each num
ber. Priced. 26 a year. Five copies for 5.
S ink's Flower and Vegetable Oarden, 60 cents,
in paper covers; with elegant cloth covers SI.
All my publications are printed in English and
GermaiK
Address, JAMES VfCK, Itochester.N. Y.
GOLD. MINES & LANDS. COAL.
COLD. MINES AND LANDS COAL
SILVER SOLI). OIL
LEAD COMPANtKS OltOANIZED, STONE
IKON MINIMI AOENCV. copi-eu
M AKBLK 206 S. SEVENTH 8TKEET, LIME
COAL PlULtHKLPIlIA, MICA
MAUL A. II. WVMAN & CO. OYPol'M
S". TO BUY A FARM.
Send for our Catalogue.
A. II. WYMAN & CO.;
No, 2 6 SOUTH SliVENTH bTKEET. 8U
. PHILADELPHIA.
ennn Agents wanted to subscribe for the
OUUU Agents' Journal, a handsomely bound.
21 page Journal, brim lull of Interest to Aiients.
Speuiinen copy aeut free. AUENTS' JOL'KN AL,
New York. Hwlt
PRINTING of every description aeally x
ecuted at the Bloom field Tinea CMttce l'
reasonable rtttei.
rtrt fi l lltpfirlh4v
fir "i i sii 's 1 1. n i.i in unit i.trrn- vciaA
fCff rnnsril.tTF.nt UIK.nfardfnrl'MiMimp.Ynai
jhMi tini. riuL'hs, Itroiii-liitis a- nil Srrnlulous )r HI
irl illwisPK. Ak inunlrui.'i;M fur Hamuli's
' I lie hs not ircit It, I s ill. ra rrr ipt jff
M
tTTlie Uotiton Courier prints the
following " lioy's composition :" " Hens
Is curious animals. They don't have no
nose, nor no teeth, nor no ears. T hey
swallow their wittles whole and chew It
up In their crops inside of 'em. The
outside of hens is generally put Inter
pliers and Inter feather dusters. The
inside of a hen is sometimes filled with
marbles and shirt-buttons and slch. A
hen is very much smaller than a good
many other animals, but they'll dig up
more tomato plants than anything that
nln'tahen. liens is very useful to lay
eggs for plum puddings. Skinny Bate
eat so much plum-pudding once that It
sent him into the collery. Hens has
got wings and can fly when they get
scart. I cut Uncle William's hens bead
off with a hatchet, and it scart her to
death. Hens sometimes make very fine
spring chickens."
g" " Have you got airy clock to sell
somethln' nolce, for a present to me
slather V" "We have all kinds of
clocks," replied the jeweler; "twenty-four-hour
clocks," and eight day clockn,
from $1,50 up to $200 In price. Here i
one that will justsult you a fine French
clock, worth $15. "Go 'way wid yer
French clock 1 Give us wan that me
sisther kin understand whin itsthrike8l'r
t Winehell tells story of a stranger
seeing an Irishman leaning against a
post, watching a funeral procession,
coming out of a brick house at his side,
when the following dialogue ensued :
" Is that a funeral V"
" Yes, Sir I'm thinking that it is."
"Any body of diedinction'r"'
" I reckon it is, Sir."
"Who is it that died?"
"The gintleman in the coffin. Sir "
t&F Al. Dudley was a prominent law
yer in Toulumne. He was employed to
defend a client for stealing a hog jury
trial. Dudley made an eloquent and,
successful plea. The man was acquitted.
He was grateful, but had no money.
" How can I ever repay you., Mr. Dud
ley; I haven't a cent. Accept my
thanks." "Thanks be hanged!" said
Al. " Send me a sld of the pork."
aHT " Ten dimes make one dollar,"
said the school master. "Now go on,
sir. Ten dollars make one what!"''
" They make one mighty glad these
times," replied the boy, and the teacher,,
who hadn't got his last month's salary
yet, concluded the boy was about right.
m " Children," said the teacher, ad
dressing the infant class, " Children do
you know you were all born, in si nV"''
" Please sir," Interjupted a. little one,.
" I wasn't : I was born in Cumberland."
" Well, that's the same thing," said,
the teacher impatiently, "Don't inter
rupt me any more."
A cunning Juryman addressed the
clerk of the court when administering
the oath, saying, " Speak up.; I can not
hear what you say." " Stop ; are you,
deaf ?" asked the judge. "Yes, of one
eur." " Then you may leave the box,
for It is necessary that jurymen, should,
hear both side."
Solitude.
" I say," said a dandy toau intelligent
mechanic, " I say, I've got an idea into,
my head."
" Well," jeplied the other, " If you.
don't cherish it with great eare,. it will,
die for w&at of eompanione."
Ptetio Silver Argument.
On onslde of the trade dollar i a
young lady in a nightgown sitting u
a bale of cotton and holding an ellve
branch in her extended hand. Who can
resist this silent appeal for help ? Why
war cm the trade dollar '(
Cif When a Kentucky judge some
years since, was asked by an attoney,
upo som Strang ruling, "Is that
law, your honor V" He replied"' if the
coart understood herself, and she think
she do, it are!"
t3T A fellow was told, at a tailor's
hop, that three yards of clolh, by being
wet, would shrink one quarter of a
yard "Well, then," l.e inquired, "If
you should wet a quarter of a yard,
would there be any left ?"
tl" " I ment to have told you of that
bole," said a man to his friend, who
stumbled into a pit of water.
" No matter now," said he, brushing
the mud and water from his mouth,
"I have found it." .
" Let the toast be, dear woman,"
as the man said when he kicked his
wife Into the fire.
Itjr Why do old maids wear mittens
To keep off the chaps.