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VOL. XT.
STEAV 13LOOMFIEL.3D, TUESDAY, .TUNE 2(J, 1877.
NO. 20.
a ij i 43 ini
THE TIMES.
An Independent family Newspaper,
is punr.isiiKD bvkiit Tuesday nr
F.31011TIME11 & CO.
Subscription Price.
Within the Comity, II 25
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clet Tocti'v.
SITTING AROUND.
They are sitting around upon barrels and
chairs,
Discussing their own and their, neighbor's
affairs,
And the look of content that Is seen on each
faco
Booms to (ay, " I ha vo found my appropriate
place,"
Bitting around.
In bar-rooms and groceries calmly they Bit,
And serenely chew borrowed tobacco, and
spit,
While the storlei they tell, and the Jokes that
they crack
Show tholr hearts have grown hard and un
doubtedly black,
AVhllo sitting around.
The " sitter around" is a man of no means,
And his face wouldu't pass for a quart of whito
beans,
Yet he somehow or other contrives to exist,
And Is frequently . seen with a drlDk In his
AVhllo sitting around.
THE PARSON'S STORIES.
LAST week I told of a marriage where
the daughter feared the mother and
now I will tell of a ease where the tables
were turned, and a mother ran away to
be married unknown to her daughter.
" I want you to marry us," an ordinary-looking
man said when I went to
my front door one afternoon In reply to
a demand for my presence ; "and there
is the license," he added.
" With pleasure," I replied. " Please
bring in the lady," for I saw he wished
to be married on the spot, and was in a
great hurry.
" She can't come in," ho said ; " she
came a horseback with me, and we are
in a desperate haste, l'loase come down
never mind your hat and marry us
on our horses. You see we are in such
a hurry,"
I went down to my gate, some sixty
feet from the front door for we lived in
the suburbs of the town and, sure
enough, there was a woman there on
horseback in a calico dress and a deep
sun-bonnet, holding her companion's
horse by the bridle as' he got on.
" I will not marry you in the street,"
I said. " Ride at least into my yard ;"
and I went in. Now, there was a hedge
of boU d'etre, or Osage orange, along my
front fence twenty feet high. I had in
terwoven the branches over the gate, so
that we had to stoop in entering on foot.
Of course it was impossible to ride on
horseback through the close and thorny
barrier, and I went up to the bousejeav
ing them to do as they pleased. Fastening
their horses very reluctantly, they came
into the house. I made a swift ceremony
of it. The bridegroom forgot to pay me
my fee which was perhaps his revenge
upon me for my obstinacy and mount
ing their horses they were soon out of
Bight.
Hurdly were they gone before a young
girl rode up on a pony to the gate, jump,
ed off and ran in, exclaiming, " Oh, am
I too late V"
She was nothing but an ordinary country-girl,
not at all pretty, much freckled
evidently used to hard work, adorned
with the duplicate of the calico dress and
gingham sun-bonnet worn by her moth
er. The ladies of my household took
pity on the poor thing as she sank upon
the matting in the hall, weeping and
lamenting. She had ridden hard, wag
very dusty and thirsty, and it ' was im
possible not to sympathize wkh her. It
was easy to Imagine her story before she
told it . " My mother is a poor, sickly
woman. She is almost worked to death
already since father died," she sobbed.
" We llvo out along the road on a little
place keep chickens and things. Why
there's a little baby In the cradle not a
year old Hub we call him and there's
four more of us, all girls."
" What on earth did the man want to
marry her for V" one of my family ask
ed, for we saw that thoy all belonged to
the class known as " poor while folks,"
with whom the negroes had as little to
do, except to sell stolen chickens to them
for whiskey, as possible. " What in
ducementwhat did the nion wunlV
was asked.
" lie wanted her to work tut hlni. lie
has got no nigger, and that was the only
way he could get one," was the reply.
" You see, he lives near us," the poor
girl proceeded, rocking hurself to and
fro as she sat on the floor, and already
sunk Into the stony sorrow which seem
ed to be her normal condition, "and he
worked his other wife to death not six
months ogo four months. There he
was with six little children, and lie the
laziest man that ever lived., lie's too
lazy to patch his roof to keep out the
water, and half his children are always
down with ague or something. The
weeds is higher than his corn. All he
cares for Is a patch of tobacco in a cor
ner of his place, and that Is for his own
smoking. The caster-oil weeds are taller
than his chimney almost, and he raises
gooherpeas, only his hogs always root
'em up, for his fence Is always down.
He's got an old cow, and she hooks, and
he wants my mammy to milk her for
him, I suppose. He's the meanest
white man living I" the girl added.
" But why did you not persuade your
mother" I began.
" Beg her not, you mean1" tho girl
said. " I never did nothing else. I
said, ilOh, mammy, mammy I please
don't ! Look at poor little Bub. All he
wants old Parkins, they call him is
to make a nigger of you.' Beg? I've been
down at her knees crying and begging
all this last week. And she is such a
good, good mother, such a hard, hard
working woman when her ague will let
her. I knew what he meant when I
saw them horses hitched to his fenco
this morning. But, you see, little Bub
was having tho fever after his chill
was crying for water. ' You run to t,he
spring, Marthy,' she said to me mam
my says, says she 'and I'll quiet Bub
till you come back.' I ran every step of
the way there and back, never thinking;
but when I come back she was gone I
Bub was crying fit to kill ; but I catched
up Bill that's our pony in the stubble-field,
and I jumped on, and I holler
ed to a neighbor as I rode by, ' Please to
run over for a moment to Bub!' and I
rode as hard as I could What did you
do It for V" she said to mo with sudden
ferocity. " You might ha' known bet
ter ! No, I won't have anything to eat
under this here roof. I want to get back
to little Bub. and you a minister tool"
" Ah me I" I thought as she mounted
her poor scrub of a pony and rode weari
ly off, "this is not the first time I feel
after a marriage as Jack Ketch feels, or
ought to feel, after an execution ; and
I am afraid it will not be the liftt time I
feel so."
JOHN WILKES BOOTH.
THE NEWEST STOKY ABOUT HIS BURIAL.
AFTER a lapse of twelve years there
are still those who doubt that John
Wilkes Booth, the assassin of Lincoln,
suffered death for his great crime. From
time to time his presence has been re
ported in various quarters and currency
given to statements-of his recognition in
Cuba, Italy, South America, and even
in different sections of the United States,
by those who had known him profes
sionally and otherwise before and during
the war. Others admitting his death
claim to know the last resting place of
his remains. For a number of years
some ladies of Baltimore are said to have
annually decorated with floral offerings
a grave In the vicinity of that city in
which the bones of Booth are supposed
to lie. A correspondent of the Cincin
nati Enquirer states that ho Is burled In
the soil of Maryland between two lofty
mountain - ranges and predicts that
a monument will yet be erected to
perpetuate his memory. That these
several theories are fallacious, that Booth
met his death in the manner officially
reported at the time, and that his body
was forever hidden from sight In a se
questered place, known only to those
to whom the duly of secreting It was en
trusted Is generally accepted.
And yet there Is nn air of mystery
hanging about the fate of this noted
criminal that Invests with interest what
ever may tend to the final solution of all
remaining doubts.
It has been ascertained that Captain
Oliver P. Leslie, now of Pittsburgh, pos
sessed personal knowledge of fuels and
circumstances connected with the great
tragedy and Its subsequent events, a re
porter of tho Pittsburgh Telegraph call
ed. on him and received from him an ac
count of tho scenes of which he was an
eye-witness.
Captain Leslie was one of the earliest
friends of Mr. Lincoln's youth, and it
so hapiened that he was In tho vicinity
of Ford's theatre on tho night when he
received his death wound, and was one
of the few who had reached the door
when the President was brought out on
his litter, and carried across tho street to
Bennett's, where ho died. Capt. Leslie
says that ho hud often seen Booth act In
Cincinnati, and at other points und had
boarded with hi m at tho Metropolitan
Hotel, in Washington, for weeks before
the close of his career.
In the corridors of the hotel ho fre
quently saw Booth put his hands Into
his box-cout pockets and pull them out
filled with gold, exclaiming, " I havo
made two thousand dollars In ' He' spec
ulations and I will strike a lead In less
than a month that will bring mo in a
million." This was about ten days
previous to the assassination and Capt.
Leslie says bis attention was attracted to
the circumstunco by its repetition and by
subsequent events.
From his previous knowledge of the
man's personal appearance, he is posi
tive beyond doubt that tho dead body of
John Wilkes Booth, which was brought
from tho scene, of death by Col. and
Lieut. Baker, was on tho monitor Mon
tauk at 5 o'clock on tho morning after
he was killed by Boston Corbett, and
that it remained there under guard for
about forty-two hours thereafter. After
the body was placed on the boat, a guard
of six naval oillcers, of whom Captain
Leslie was one, was set to watch it.
Capt. Leslie and Captain Willoughby
were In the same relief, and served two
hours on and four hours off while the
body remained on board the monitor.
While these men were standing guard
the multitude was allowed to view the
body, passing on the stern of tho Mon
tauk by a bridge of scows, and off at tho
bow in the same manner, after looking
at the remains for a few seconds. Among
these were many persons, who had
known Booth more or less intimately,
including about three hundred actors.
The Captain relates the Instance of a
large, fine-looking man, having the ap
pearance of an army officer, who, in
passing, placed the palm of his hand on
the forehead of the dead assassin, and
invoked the most frightful imprecation
on the soul of the departed.
During the time the body lay on tho
Montauk several propositions were made
for the final disposition of the body,
which were voted upon by the five hun
dred or one thousand officers aboard.
Of these Captain Leslie remembers but
two of three of the more remarkable.
One was that two of the wildest steeds
that could be obtained should be har
nessed together and chained to Booth's
heels and taken to the Bladensburg
duelling ground, and there turned loose
to run until the body was dragged to
pieces.
A gentleman who had the appearance
of a foreign officer proposed that a tower
should be built from three hundred to
five hundred feet high, and that thereon
should be placed a cauldron, In which
the body should lie until It was wasted
away by the sun and storm, and de
stroyed by the birds of the air.
It was also suggested that this tower
should be left standing for ages as a
memorial of the Infamous deed of the
murderer. These and other propositions
were rejected, and it was finally agreed
to deliver the body to the two Bakers
who captured the traitor, to dispose of
in suen manner as they might be di
rected. The body, which at the end of
the forty-two hours It had lain on board
the Montauk was in an advanced state
of decomposition, was accordingly giv
en Into the custody of the Bakers, who
were required to take the following
oath.
"You, gentlemen, bolnir already sworn
officers of tho United States do further
swear that you will take the dead body
of John Wilkes Booth, and dispose of It
In a manner known only to youi selves,
and that you never will communicate to
any others the whereabouts or disposi
tion of the body, either by words, signs,
hieroglyphics, or In any other manner,
and that you- will not talk of It your
selves, least you be overheard."
The oath was administered by the Pro
vost Marshal, Captain Stone, addressing
the Bakers, added ; " and not desecrate
loyal soil with his body." The remains
were then taken away, and their dispo
sition Is of course only a matter of spec
ulation.
Captain Leslie, however, is of the Im
pression that they were sunk in a lake
some twelve miles in width and forty to
sixty feet in depth, seven miles below
Alexandria, Virginia, known as the
'Alligator Pockets." Ho states that
about two hundred pounds of hawser
chain was on the deck of the Montauk
near the body at the time he stood watch
and he was of the opinion that this was
afterwards used to sink the body in the
"Alligator Pockets." In confirmation
of this theory, Captain Lesliestates that
Murphy, who served as a pilot with
Lieutenant Baker for twelve years, and
knew that the latter had thoroughly
measured the water in this lake when
shooting alligators, said that he knew
tho body was sunk in those waters.
A DUTCHMAN'S LICENSE.
SEVERAL YEARS AGO there dwelt
and for ought I know there still
dwells an old Dutchman on the line of
the Erie canal ; very Illiterate, but very
fond of money, and, by some chance or
other, pretty well supplied with it. It
was rumored, however, that he was not
over-scrupulous at times how he made It
and the following Incident goes to sub
stantiate tho charge :
There came to his house one day an
awkward looking Individual, betraying
in every turn and gesture that he hailed
whence wooden nutmegs anil other
Yankee commodities arg brought to
market.
"How do, Squire?" was Jonathan's
salutation, squirting a gill of tobacco
juice Inside the door, by way of u more
definite announcement that lie was
" round."
" Valk in,mlue frient," said the Dutch
man. In stalked Jonathan, peeping on all
sides, and finally settled his six feet be
the same more or less of llesh' and
bones in a chair near the chimney cor
ner. '
" Squire," he said, ufter a pause, pro
ducing a jack knife and chipping off a
Xlece from the boot jack that lay behind
him, " I've a notion somehow or t'oth
er to be arter gwine to the far West ; but
darn my picter if it ain't a long way
thar, and I kinder guess I'm on the
wrong track." And he went on whit
tling, eyeing the Dutchman occasionally
from beneath the half disjointed front
piece to his plush cap.
. "You goesh vest, eh?" exclaimed
Mynheer ; " veil, you ish on the right
roat, my frient ; but have you got a 11
ehense to go vest ?"
" Liclnse!" cried Jonathan, suspend
ing his whittling; " I ain't got the first
one, and what's more, cap'n, I ain't
never heern of the thing afore uuther."
"Veil, veil," said the Dutchman,
" that vou't do at all. You musht have
a llcherise to go vest, for because they
von't let you shettle out thero without
vone."
" How you talk !" was the Yankee's
ejaculation, deeply oouuerned at this
piece of intelligence. s
Pat is the truth.mine frieut,' pursued
the Dutchman ; " but I have lieheuaes
to shell don't you vaut to puy vou, my
frient?"
" Can't dodge it iu no way, can I ?"'
exclaimed the raw one. " How much '11
the tarnal critter come to?" he asked,
producing a weazel skin iu an a alarm
ing state of depletion.
"Only tew tollars, dat'sh all, mine
frieut," said the operator, rubbing his
hands and rising to receive the fee.
' Well, I suppose I've got to deu It,
anyhow, cap'n," remarked Jonathan,
"shelling out the pewter," piece by
piece, until he had counted out into the
Dutchman's greedy palm two " halves"
and " four quarters," leaving a balance
In the weazel of three " York shillings,"
a " dime" and two " reds."
"Down with tho document, Squire,"
ho cried, shoving the skin into his
breeches pocket, and rising.
" Veil, mine good veller, snld Dutchy,
"Inln't got my spectacles, and you
writes, don't you ?"
"Just like a school marm, old chop,"
replied Jonathan.
"Veil, den, you writes won," said
Mynheer, " for yourself, putting down
your name, for to go vest and shettle
there, and I'll sblgn It. Come up to the
table, inlsther, and I shall give you do
pen and paper."
The writing materials were produced ;
Jonathan threw his plush cap on the
floor, seized the old grey goose quill in
the Ink-born, tried Its point on bis
thumbnail; crouching his head until
his right ear almost touched tho paper,
he drew his tongue out Its whole length -and
wrote. When he had closed the '
scroll he threw himself back In hischair
to scan tho production and see If It was
all right.
"That's the talk," he cried at length, i
These are presents is to Inform all it may
concern as how Jeddydiar Doosenberry
is hereby and herein entitled to go to the
fur West, and take up land, be the same
more or less, and squat thereupon, for
having paid me in hand the sum of tew
dollars, lawful currency, as license for
so gwlnc West and squatting thar."
"Dat's it!" exclaimed the Dutch
man. " Wall, Squire," cried the Yankee;
" put your fist thar."
The license man did as he requested,
and signed his name to the writing.
" Jeddydiar," as be called himself,took
the paper, folded it very carefully as
boys foot up a puzzle, and desposited it
in his vest pocket among an assortment
of old " chews" of tobacco, gun-flints,
matches and other articles too numerous
to mention. Then rising,he exclaimed :
" Squire, I'm much obliged to ye for
this 'ere piece of counsel. It takes a
feller nine lives to keep track of the new
kinks that turn up in the law. Good
bye to ye."
" Good-bye, good-bye," cried the
Dutchman, and the victim went off',. I
whistling " Yankee Doodle."
A week had elapsed after the transac- I
tion we have just chronicled, and our I
Dutch acquaintance had about forgotten j
It, when a merchant of the village call-
cd upon him saying:
" Mr. S. if it is convenient, I should
like the amount of the order which yoa:
sent me the other day, which I paid to
a man by the name of Doosenberry." '
. "An orter!" cried the Dutchman,
utterly upset by the demand. " I never
give an orter to nobody." ' f
" But here It is," continued the mer
chant, producing an order duly signed,
requesting him to pay " Jeddydiar
Doosenberry" twenty-live dollars In
goods.
Dutchy saw at a glance he was sold,
paid up like a man, and has never oper
ated in licenses since.
A Surprise Party Surprised.
Surprise parties are still in vogue and
very popular. So the young people of
thought, and one day they decided
to surprise old Grandpa and Grandma
Dorking, who had a large house and
long parlor, and a fine piano,' and
just the nicest place for a grand party in
the State. And they packed their bas
kets and harnessed their horses and
went over to the Dorking mansion, fifty
strong, bouud to have a delightful Eight
of it. But old Mrs. Dorking looked out
of the window in her night-cap, and
wanted to know "where the fire was ?"
And old Mr. Dorking brought out his
double-barrelled shot-gun and got ready
to shoot the burglars. And when the
bravest of the iarty a wouiau explain
ed to old Mr. Dorking that they were not
desperadoes, but on innocent surprise
party, and that they had baskets of cold
chicken, biscuit, and jelly along with,
them, old Mrs. Dorking said that if she
wanted a party, she could find the vict
ual:., and old Mr. Dorking said that
wheu he wanted to see his neighbors he
generally iuvlted them, and got ready to
6hoot again and the youug people of
drove away, very much of the
optulon that surprise parties were not
very popular in that neighborhood.