SR: I WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 31st, 1927 f { — On With Laughter) 21 Have you heard he raw or anything of that sort?” drives a stolen car with no lights wear song as yet fellows. It goes I si and no license plates the wron : ro. A Woman’s Troubles The little man hesitated a p g someting. like this: “Underwear A woman’s always on the jump, moment, looking a bit frightened, Way on a one-way street, and, af- my baby is tonight. i" Her troubles make a mere man then replied, in a small piping |ter running down two policemen, E ond then: th grin; voice: “ I sometimes chew a little piss into a police station—he is very now an en the average ’ 3 t plum um.” unlucky. wife meets a hatchet-faced woman If she's not trying 0 ge bump, 12 | Youll find she’s trying to get 3 she’d just love to have her husband thin Just doped outa Tot ene 1 They tell this one on Charlie live with for a while and get what : ou? a8 2 3 YI Roth. They say he accidentally cut Girls you're out of luck. Somelwon’t send any letters by air mail. |; fellow in the neck several times was coming to him. Scientists say they know the, moon has nothing to do with rain fall and some of the old people here in town say they know better. We'll leave it up to you as to who is right, There's a certain young fellow here in town who works at the cot- ton mill and he’s trying his best to get ahead. I'm darn sure he needs one. Some folks argue that fish can’t live in hot water but I know they can. There are several married men borrowing five in town who have been in hot wa- neighbor but he will have a blamed fused. true to are better than one but I'll bet my that the worn out week’s pay that | office devil and its clean too: “Mr, Potato was all eyes for Miss Squash |and they were to the parson didn't Turnip.” THE MOUNT JOY BULLETIN, MOUNT JOY, LANCASTER CO., PA. dollars from ter for a long time and are still site more trouble getting it back. very much alive—the poor fishes. a ease Another dumb bell just blew in. Doc Heilig says you should be His check which he gave to one of your teeth or theyll be our stores came back marked “no alse to you, planation he said: “It’s mighty heads funny. I just read in the Bulletin bank had a ‘surplus of nearly a million.” Some one said that two against your truth- straw hat you can't fully say that after you've gone to A lady went to Booth’s store movies. and asked for a pound of animal . crackers but she said she didn’t A fellow in town declares that yng any lions or tigers because exaggeration isn't lying but believe pov frighten the baby. me it’s the best heard of. substitute I ever A small, henpecked, worried-look- ing man was about to take an ex- amination for life insurance. “You don’t dissipate, do physician, as he fast liver, Here's a wise crack from our you?” be married but asked the ready for tests. “Not a guy has perfected a motometer When I want my for sofas. em on fly paper. A cat and dog will often asso- = i es |] ha ciate with each other in perfect | : | matter, hair in your mouth? peace until they're tied together. ! We had a new one ir town Sat- | The fellow replied: “No I wanta And it’s that way With some men urday night. A fellow drank some-|see if my neck leaks. and women thing like hootch and then went | A WISE OWL ? home and tried to take his pants etl Meee Willie: “Pa, what isan optimist?” off over his head. Pa: “A man who thinks that he won’t have to buy his wife a new Garber announced that fur coat because the man next Doc door did his!” janie would play a | “The White Mule.” She said: “No, | weather. As many as 20 shoats per; A fellow on East Main street father, the name of the selection is acre can be told me he had a lot of trouble “The White Donkey.” funds” and when asked for an ex- | made | letters to get to their destination in a hurry I write i on asked for a glass of water At last Tuesday’s Rotary meeting pasture his | maximum supply of piano solo, [throughout the season, even in dry his | just how Doc happened to get con- FLOUR FROM PENNA, Of course it wasn't any more of | a mixture than Mr. Coventry, of | |th¢ Grey Iron spoke about. He | said a fellow went to the American store here and asked what those, red berries were. The clerk said: | “They are cranberries and. they make much better apple-sauce than | prunes.” | | | { A fellow who moved here recent- [ly told me that a lot of prominent | citizens want him to return to his former home town. He says he] gets letters from the leading mer- chants to come back and settle. Out west men used to die with their boots on from six shooters {now its from six cylinders. When a drunken, unlicensed driver with one arm around a girl while shaving him. Finally the cus- land Charles inquired: “What’s the Alfalfa Good Hay Pasture For hogs, alfalfa is the best obtainable, furnishing a ideal forage WHEAT BEST FOR PASTRIES Many housewives are that soft winter wheat from Pennsylvania-grown wheat is recognized as the type most suit- able for pastry making. This is in- dicated by an extensive survey be- not aware flour made ing made in Pennsylvania regard- ing the use of flour and bread. Ninety per cent of the housewives included in the survey in Philadel- phia and Wilkes-Barre did not know this fact, while most of the house- wives in Sunbury were informed. Recent tests have shown that Pennsylvania flour when milled from selected wheat has proved su- perior in the baking of pastry pro- ducts, says the State Bureau of Markets. artnet Mims me SUCH IS THE LIFE OF A NEWSPAPER MAN “Getting out a weekly paper is no picnic. If we print jokes, folks say we are silly, If we don’t they say we are too serious. If we pub- lish original stuff they say we lack variety. If we clip from other pa- pers they say we are too lazy to write. If we stay in the office we ought to be out hunting up news. If we hunt up news, we are not tending to business in the office. If we wear old clothes, we're stingy. If we wear new ones, they're not paid for. Like as not, some one will say we swiped this article from another newspaper. We did.” Prepare Pullets For Laying Give the early pullets proper care and feed now to fit them for the best possible production next carried. Better plant Jsome for pasturing next year, | winter. You cannot fill the egg bas- ket when prices are high by stunt- ing the pullets and delaying their production period. SCHIROL.1.S BELOW YOU WILL FIND LISTED ANYTHING FROM A BUILDING LOT TO A $25,000 MANSION, FARM OR BUSINESS, IF YOU DON'T SEE LISTED JUST WHAT YOU WANT, CALL OR PHONE, AS I HAVE QTHERS. HERE ARE SOME OF THE BEST BARGAINS IN SMALL FARMS 1 HAVE EVER OFFERED. DWELLING HOUSES No. 230—A beautiful frame house on Marietta St., Mt. Joy. corner property with all conveni ences, fine garage and price right; No. 257—A large brick house in East Donegal, only 100 steps to trolley stop. Property in fairly good shape for $3,500, No. 263—A large frame corner property in Mount Joy. This is an ideal business place. Priced to sell Nos. 265—66—A new frame double house on South Barbara St., Mount Joy, each side 6 rooms and bath, light, heat, c Possession any time, Will sell one or both. No. 284 )-room frame house on West It. Joy, steam heat, electric 5, ete. New garage. Pi No. 30 end. ra large in, east 05. a real good buy for some This is No. 808—A frame house on Marietta street, Mount Joy. to a quick buyer. : No. 314—A very good brick dwell ing on New Haven §St., Mt. Joy, electric lights, bath, property. No. 320—A fine frame double dwelling house in Florin, new 3 Modern in ete. Rents years ago. every with garage, and $25. ter grab this. No. 321—A brick house on fine new 6-room West Donegal St., Mt. Joy. Price reasonable and pos- session given in 30 days. No. 3822—A beautiful brick mansion dwelling in very modern in every way. All conveniences. Possession in 30 days. 11l-room NO. 327—A T7-room frame house conveniences, at Pequea. Fine location. with all Also garage 16x21. Ideal for club. Only $3,500. No. 330—A 6-room frame house St., Mount Joy. slate roof, electric lights, etc., No. 206 East Donegal for only $2,600.00 No. 337—A fine veniences and in best of condition No. 339—A good 2% frame house on Main street, Florin best of shape, 2-var garage. No. 340—Lot 180x185 on crete highway between Mt. and Florin on which is stable. | Cheap | ete., corner! poultry. way | ter. 8s for $20 No. Price is only $5,600. Bet-{ Donegal Florin, No. new house on West Donegal St., Mt. Joy, all con- barn, ete. story con- | Price $2,000.00. 0 : No. 303—Truck farm of slightly|best limestone land in East Done- |ing lots. gal, good buildings, running water, meadow, ample shedding for tobacco. MOUNT J Joy one of the over 2 acres at Florin. finest and most modern dwellings.)place for trucking and poultry. J. E. SCHRO seen, No. 333—A 2-acre tract in M Joy. township, 10-room frame hous frame stable. etc., for only $2,000. I have on my list. Must be Price below present building cost No. 341—A fine: home along the t. No. 201—104 acres in the heart of | e! East Donegal tobacco district, fine buildings, shedding for 12 acres of This is a real farm. trolley at Florin, all modern con- No. 352—A dandy truck, fruit tobaco. veniences. Priced to sell and poultry farm of Jacob Stauifer,| No. 233—A 65-acre farm in the No. 342—A fine dwelling on New near Sunnyside School, in Rapho| heart of st De il, good build- Haven et, Mt, Joy. Here is a township. Here’s a snap for 1e | ings and land. ce right. ; good home nicely located and No - 120-acre farm of cheap. i TYE SIZE - AA & soil, Newtown, No. 844—Beautiful frame dwell-| ~ MEDIUM SIZED FARMS ldings, in- onegal St., up-to-the- No. 210-—31 ac x iz ing on West : T ietta and Lanc minute in air, all conveniences. i e 1 Priced to sell. per, lots of fruit, excelle trl No. 348—A 2% story frame and truck farm Only wel » 6 rooms and bath, electric| No 260—A 38 204 A 4 r stable, cor | railroad station. 6 m 1 enoug! room brick hot on 175 | tobacco shed, 2 liv : y An excellent prope Price f1 $20,0 ) No. 277—-25 Acres gravel and se, sand land near Sunnyside School, | n yded is an|7 room frame house, barn, tobacco |p: tbl acre tract in rear. shedling. Gool water. For al” at A ATES | quick sale will take...... $4,000.00 BUSINESS S1ARDS TRUCK FARMS | No. 278—30 of sand land No. I ntire c¢ t ree Tre h »00 S i No. 107—An 83%. acre tract of neat Green Ire , good soil, nu fine wa-| at Flor . 1 "O01 Se land in East Donegal, near Reich’s il room ! C church, frame house, tobacco shed, | barn, ete. $4,000.00. Rn Le | No. 183—2 acres and, rather -18 a 3 01 best lim "hilly, large double house, fine in heart of Don fine buildings in £ J I offerec macadam hig 500.00. $650. No. 184—13 acres of sand and | limestone in Rapho, frame Monsey good bank barn, fruit, running wa-| Way. I r Only $2,000. | No. 316—A 196—A Z.acre tract in near Chickies "good soil ard an excellent near Maytown, 8-room | 2 4 | house, stable, chicken house, pig sty,| 2 200d 1-man farm. house newly painted. { No. 851—A 60-acre No. 220-—10 acres limestone land | State highway east of Al Price Church, farm can remain. No. 144—A 125 acre best land in Lance. Co. Al for quick sale. No. 270—A fine truck farm of a few acres near Milton Grove, good buil Mt. Joy, gravel soil, frame house, | does not want responsibility. A dandy truck farm. No. 302—A 6-acre tract of gravel land 1% miles from Mt. Joy, good Don’t miss this. Price. frame house, poultry house, etc. | kets, schools and churches. No. 179—A farm of 107 acres An ideal LL, All farm land. Price | machinery 29-acre farm of sand|ing, gt very | at Marietta. cropper. | delay. Middletown. |a country to farm of house, barn, large shed, poultry|ings in Al shape. Located on houses, ete. for only $1,500. state highway and near a town. No. 275. —14acres, 2 miles from |Don’t need the money but own No. 161—A 235-acre farm in In- diana Co., 75 acres farm land, bal- ance timber, good buildings, young orchard, fine water and close to mar- I e- h- | R NO. car a r $3,000.00. d- | session any time, No. 346—A fine, €r | 3s a restaurant, garage. Priced for a snappy sale. BUILDING LOTS No. 57—A b-acre boro of Mount Joy, fine large and would be a money-maker of | trucking or East Main street. Price right. BELL PHONE 41R2 Don’t St., Mount Joy, old established, ci- gar, tobacco and confectionery, pos- large 3-story have advertised. brick building in Mt. Joy, now used apartments and tract in the lot | barn, ete. for speculating on build- No. 163—A fine building lot on |An 1 ha Large number of build- Mt. Joy and Flor- ) any number on, at No. 171— ing lots bet in. I ean FACTORY SITES { NO. 326-—A General Store, post P. rack 107 | on 1 : nlv 3 . Vv. Ve along | office, dwelling, ete. Only e In nv adva: \ ere a oood go- ny aay L V1. Here's a good ge ated. On in East Donegal, large frame | in Dauphin Co. Here’s a very cheap} ing proposition. #6 CHAE: town. house, frame Stable, 3 poultry|farm for some one. Let me show Ro, 30 A arg et GY | 79—A large tract covering houses, ete. “| you this bargain, ry now in operation including I 2} re block along iz. R. R 256—A farm of 1214 acres LARGE FARMS dl aga, Io I i in Mount Joy. A wonder of sand land, frame house, bank| No. 138—An 8l-acre farm of all ett iD (his quick as its|ful location at a right price. barn, chicken house, hog sty, run- | limestone_soil, in East Donegal, 11- OC OF Lor. tals quick 2 | "Neo. 345-—A plot of ground along ning water; an ideal truck and|¥oom stone house, barn, tobacco No. 331A ‘fine brick business |the railroad with concrete building poultry farm. Price only $1,800 |shed, 5 acres meadow, 3-4 of money stand aad dwelling on East it. Fine for storage or tod {small business. No further use. I also have a number of proper- ties that owners do not care to If you don’t find what you want in this list, call and see me, I have it. HUNTING CAMPS No. 262—A tract of 125 acres of farm and timber land, house, Half is farm land. Sev- eral bear pens on farm, Game such as bear, deer, pheasants, grey ideal $2,500.00. hunting camp. XY | FISHERMEN’S MECCA almost | °° and black squirrel, porcupines, ete. Price DESTROYED BY FIRE Home of Izaak Walton, Eng- |, lish Landmark. Washington, — Fishermen will be saddened to learn that Izaak Wal- ton’s thatched, half-timbered cottage at Shallowford, Staffordshire, has been destroyed by fire. “England has lost one of her best beloved, literary landmarks and fisher- men the home of the art’s most fa- |3¢ mous exponent, with the destruction of Walton's country home,” says a bulletin from the Washington head- {g quarters of the National Geographic society. lations and to begin practicing “As St. Andrews, Scotland, is the {some of them. There is one, of mecca for golfers and Stratford-upon- | course, that must not be practiced Avon the shrine of drama lovers, so Shallowford has been the place of pilgrimage for fishermen,” continues the bulletin, “Staffordshire, unrolling its green, cultivated hills and valleys midway between smoky and busy Liverpool, was the birth- place of Walton and the scene of those fishing expeditions wherein he angled and caught with the same hook, trout and many paragraphs we still acclaim, Some Famous Fishing Places. “Northwest, a few miles from the Shallowford cottage lies Madeley, country seat of John Offley, Esquire, pleat Angler’ in appreciation for per- mission to fish on Offley’'s estate. Northeast ripples the Dove through Dovedale, a green carpeted, English sort of canyon, where Walton fished with that young rake, Charles Cotton, who added to the ‘Compleat Angler’ |hicle is occupied by more than the sections on fly-fishing. Near [three persons and an accident Beresford at the upper end of the |occurs by reason thereof the opera- Dale stands the famous fishing house [tor is guilty of reckless driving. built by the impecunious, creditor-rid- T den Cotton for the use of ‘Father [to be an important provision and Walton’ and himself. one that must be obeved to the “Nothing could be in greater con- |letter. In fact they suggest that trast to an American sportsman’s fish- (no more than two people occupy ing camp than Cotton's fishing house |the front seat. on the Dove. The latter presents the These and other provisions should A appearance of a rather large, private mausoleum, Its walls are cut stone Flanking doorway. stone Co |C |p and In 1t to the fis ired, lead | tl res more than his ‘observations or ‘A first. the I: he wi reel f then ascends igher into the air; and having ended er heavenly employment, grows then nute and sad to think she must de- ‘ond te the dull earth, which she wid not touch hut of necessity.” she means to rejoice to che 1 e that hear her, she eorth. and sings as she A Qe Exhibit At the Fair Have you picked out those good animals for the fair exhibit this fall? Don’t be the fellow who says, “I have better stock than those prize winners at home.” A good ex- hibit will advertise your business. rm The women in the mountains of southern Serbia have trimmed their hair with sheep shears in a ‘childish Tducating The caster Automobile club to acquaint themselves now with the provisions of the which becomes cluded in duty of every owner and driver of state, to know about the new regu- until the new code goes into effect, and that is the creases the speed limit from 30 to 35 miles per hour on the open highways and from 15 to 20 miles: hour elsewhere, except in Birmingham |per school zones. the one that requires main streets to come to fore moving onto the main thorovgh fare. This practice is great safeguard and cficials of che Lancaster Automobile that it be tried out ncw by drivers to whom Walton dedicated the ‘Com- [in corners and also that the car oper- ators may be fully acquainted with this regulation by the time the new code goes into effect. if the front seat of any motor ve- be studied and in order to acquaint the motorists the regulations included in the new | VILLAGE PLANNING BIG D on of ar ounded with ample lawns a and attractive borders. Vi hat do not minister to the 1ee( f the farming communities likel drift Motoring Public ALUABLE INFORMATION FOR MOTORISTS FURNISHED THE BULLETIN BY LANCASTER AUTOMOBILE CLUB ae. Motorists are urged by the Lan- State Vehicle Code, effective January 1, )28. Many new regulations are in- this code and it is the new car, officials of the Auto Club clause which in- Another provision is cars entering from cross a full stop be- important thoroughfai es considered a Club suggest lessen order to dengers at The new code also provides that his is considered by club officials of this section with Ley yde the Lancaster Automobile lub will, from time to time, ex- lai through the columns of this ewspaper the numerous changes at are brought about under the ew law, —— eer FACTOR IN COMMUNITY LIFE City planning as practical in met- itan centers has its counter- the development of villages s social and trade cen- ing communities. The affords the farmer wid- » of choice in selecting his ition and in selling his pro- and buying supplies. Some elements of good physical p of towns and villages, ac- to Wayne Farm Life of the griculture, are and reets, C. Nason, of the Population and Department of convenient and entrances, broad a common or vil- 1ge green as a civic center, park 1 ound space, sanitation, tecture in private dwell- as well as in public buildings, iich should be conveniently loecat- , and all set back from the streets asing exits 1 to complain of the s and of ruinous compe- that are attractive, riceable, also profit increasing army of which fore- 3 yensive mis- recommended 4% Asin the 3 rad start J ager in new vill- an eye mont, ehurst, Other er in n work at tion of long- nent of un- wear out. wide and ;ociations 5. A long which ices in- umunities ardeau, Minn. ; 1 and Pat- concludes is in its infan- a waste ‘but forestalling sums in the in r the economic, soO- : sthetic welfare of the 20,000,0( le who live in wil- y towns and of the ),000,000 farm people who use them. 4 en eed eee The, poultry industry of the United States is a billion dollar in- dustry. In fact, according to Roy C. Potts, chief poultry marketing specialist of the United States partment of Agriculiure, -it} has passed well beyond that valué and has become one of the lehding agricultural industries of the poun- try. Chicken egg productign on farms is in the neighborhood pf 2,- 000,000,000 dozen annually “Sh a value of $600,000,000 or more the number of poultry raised year is approaching three-qus duetion, known, the bob’ since antisuity.