THE BULLETIN, MOUNT JOY, PA.

Wednesday, September 2
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ESTAIL
SALE
BILLY

THAT'S WHAT WE WANT TO TALK ABOUT TO YOU NOW.
IF YOU CONTEMPLATE MAKING SALE OF
TATE THIS FALL, PLEASE REMEMBER THE
YOUR REAL ES-
MOST IMPORT-
ANT FACTOR IN YOUR SALE IS ADVERTISING IT PROPERLY.
FIRST—YOU WANT AN ATTRACTIVE
SALE BILL.
SECOND—DISTRIBUTE YOUR BILLS PROPERLY.
THIRD—HAVE ENOUGH POSTERS—DON'T
NUMBER BECAUSE A FEW EXTRA COST A
ONE BID ON YOUR FARM WILLMAKE
A DOZEN TIMES.
FOURTH—DON'T FAIL TO ADVERTISE YOUR
IN A PAPER THAT REACHES THE PEOPLE—A
A LARGE CIRCULATION. THAT'S THE WAY TO
PETITIVE BIDDERS.
ALL THESE CONDITIONS
Bulletin
ARE COMPLIED WITH
Office
SLIGHT THE
DOLLAR MORE,
UP THAT DIFFERENCE
PROPERTY
PAPER WITH
GET COM-
AT THE
East Main Street
Mount Joy, Pe
rm
AND WE DON'T LIE ABOUT IT
YOURSELF IF YOU WILL JUST
AND SEE THE PAPER PRINTED
OUR PRICES ARE AS LOW
KNOW THE KIND OF POSTERS YOU GET HERE.
nna.
EITHER AS YOU CAN SEE FOR
TAKE THE TIME TO DROP IN
AS ANYBODY’S AND YOU ALL
WE WOULD
BE PLEASED TO HEAR FROM ANY ONE HAVING SALE.

REMEMBER
IF WE PRINT YOUR POSTERS YOU GET A FREE
NOTICE IN
OUR SALE REGISTER FROM NOW UNTIL THE DAY OF SALE.
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Humor and
By DUNCAN M, SMITH
PERT PARAGRAPHS.
IF it is something
for nothing how the other
side of the sketch when you get noth-
ing for something?

impossible to get
nhout
When a bad man makes good does
it make him a good man?
The shortest distance between two
points is the circuitous path round the
obstucle separating them.
The man who pleases himself ought
to be satisfied with the job
Some people are able to put on style
by the simple expedient of living off
their friends.
The flood often washes away what
one has laid up for a rainy day.
People who haven't much in them
are easily seen through
Some people don’t care much about
brains. They are the people who don’t
know much about them.
The man who makes his own living
easily and quickly doesn’t see why any
one should starve to death.

Passing on the Trouble.
The really truly joy ride,
The kind that makes a hit,
Is with a friend for chauffeur.
Just take my word for ft.
You go on gayly salling
And taking in the view,
And if he has a puncture
Pray what is that to you?
B80 many misadventures
May possibly occur
The springing of an axle,
The dropping of a bur,
The balking of the spark plug
And little things like that
Need not produce annoyance
Beneath your summer hat.
And if you should go bumping
Into another car
And do a lot of damage
And get an all round jar 13
Or bump into a lamppost
Or try a hedge to trim
When all is being settled
The bill is up to him. |
No gasoline to pay for,
And when you ride afar
And get home in the evening |
He has to clean the car, |
Yes, the ideal joy ride |
Built on the only plan
You get when you are able
To work the other man.
He Felt It.
The strong man bowed his head and
wept. Tears trickled along the fur
rows in his cheek and ran down the
mahogany legs of the table,
“What is the matter, love?’ asked
nis wife, shooing away a fly with &
diamond studded fan. “Has some on@
unloaded a bum car of wheat on you?
“No,” he replied frankly; “I am cry-
because my life has been a fall
|
|
are.’
“Your life is no failure,” she protest-
ed, putting her arms about him. “You
know the last time we counted up you
had $58,000,000, and you must have
skinned several rivals since then.”
“1 know,” he replied, “I have some
money, but what’s the use of that? I
have never been roasted by the magae |
zines, so how can you call me a sue
cess?’
A Hitter and a
Nudger.
‘“‘She never
talks much.”
“No, but she
manages to con-
vey a whole lot.”
“How does she
do it?”
‘‘Some times
with her fists
and sometimes
with her elbows.”

Distressing.
“Oh, dear!”
“What's the matter?”
“I am very unhappy.”
“What have you to be unhappy
about?”
“I can’t think of anything I want.”
A Paradox.
“Were you ever seasick?”
“Well, I guess yes.”
“Very?
“l should say so. 1 have been 80
geasick 1 couldn’t see.
Quite the Limit.
“They seem to Le nice girls.”
“But they are so wild.”
“Is that possible?”
“Indeed -it is. They eat pickles at all
hours of the night.”
Just a Fancy.
“He does like to have his own way.”
“Married ?"
“Very much =o.”
“He can take it out in liking.”
How He Could Afford It.
“What is his business in life?”
“He is a poet.”
“I didn’t know that he married
money.”
Habit.
Our pleasant southern neighbors
Have something of a way
Of mixing with their labors
Their spe kind of play
Though they stop their shooting,
I'm very much afraid
They’!l go on reveluting,
For isn’t it their trade?
—— Ay Ai

Will Try Her Speed

Mr. Frank Phillips has Mabel S.
ntered in the 2.35 class of the In-
ter-County Pace t the l.ancaster

A A ee
English “Slip On” Coats
Guaranteed Proof,
Mad
Canton Clotl t om £ 0 to
Rain seams
wed and ce ted of E
815.0( G
—————
Read the Mt. Joy Bulletin.

| call him Bill?"
. form him anyway.”

Humor and
Philosophy
By DUNCAN M. SMITH
ADA

PERT PARAGRAPHS.
IT wouldn't matter so much about have
in empty pocket if the stomach
the through
ing
didn’t
sheer sympathy,
emulate pocket
There are people who can't tell the
difference between beauty and adipose
tissue,
All talking machines gle not phono
graphs, and some are good cooks.
Most of us like the odor of burning
money and are not in the least afraid
the smoke will choke us to death.
Let Time avenge you. He knows
how and never forgets
Being able to have what you want
seldom causes you to want what you
have.
There is only one thing that a bache-
lor is more afraid of than being en-
gaged, and that is being married.
Some men are so good that they are
dreadfully dull
Don't look for misfortune. If fit
comes your way it will thrust itself
upon you without any action on your
part
Feared the Drop.
“I invited Mr. Truax to drop in any
time.”
“Why, John Jores!”
wife, dropping into tears
you?”
“What's
right 7”
“Do vou know what he has been do-
ing?’
“Nothing disreputable, I hope.
“Buying (boo-hoo) a flying machine.”
exclaimed his
“How could
the harm? Isn't he all
Willing to Get
Even.
“You want a |
horse that will
not shy at auto-
mobiles?" |
“Worse than
A TY TTT EE TY HET TT TITY PE IIS POET IF I POT)
that. I want a
fierce, nag
that will walk up
to the monsters |
and bite them in |
a vital spot.”
fiery
|
|
|

|
|
Generous.
makes his friends such hand- |
“He
some presents.’
“But 1 don't see how
to do it.”
“Oh, you've no idea how expert he is
in keeping out of the way of his cred-
ftors!”
he can afford

|
|
Can't Round Him Up. (
“Isn't Maude’s husband's name Has |
ry?
“Yes.” |
“I thought so too. But why does she

“She says he is so hard to collect.”
|

Only Safe Way |
If wishes were horses |
Then beggars might ride, |
But if they were autos |
The walkers would hide {
Those Girls |
“Well, I'd never marry a man to 8 |

“Oh, 1 see.”
“See what?”
“You'd be satisfied vith any kind of
a man.”
Difficult Matter.
“I would rather be good than great,
wouldn't you?”
“Well, 1 don't know about that.”
“Why not?!
“I think 1 could be great easier.”

Falls Over Himself.,
“Why 1s Dobbins always so in ar
rears?”
“Because he is so busy.”
“So busy?"
“Yes; trying to get ahead.”
The Modern Remedy
“What's the matter with your horse,
sonny 7’
“wind broken, sir.’
“Hasn't your pa got a bicycle pump?
I'm very mu
In trying to d
The color of the a
In which abroad
Although yet s

L
I'll ride.
( distance

}
the skies.
} irments,
| ou advise?
Fl
¥
{
{ I wonder i
i Part time and part on trust.
} ©%, it’s a lot of trou
But it is worth the
riding in my
T int to go
™ t is in
I » to say
I'm very sorely trot
About the mak
re ell @
Must Support His Family
5 |
Frank Stauffer, of Sporting Hill, |
was heard on a charge of failing to |
support his wife and five children. |
The wife is ill at the present time |
and inable to le the house
Stauffer said that he would be willing
1 nother chance, |
|
and the Court continued the case un- |
der his promise to t his
EO i
]
Read the Bulletin i
Read the Bulletin {
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AT ITY ROI IPI IROINI IORI IIINY
We Offer 1912 Beo Cars
at Heduced 1912 Prices
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DO
Oo
not only a record breaker in price but has also made remarkable records in endur-
n( rut hill-elimbing, racing, and cross conitnent conte Some of these records have never
been made by any car, regarless of price.
The following will give you some idea as to their speed: .
“Oct, 15 In a 50 mile race the Reo defeated a higher priced car, well known for its racing
record, by ten miles, Reo time, 57 minuets 43 seconds, over a very sandy course.”
This is one of the many remarkable records which helped to make the Reo famous
Ask for demonstrations and
Our REO DELIVERY TRUCK is also anothe
The REO $750, truck is without a doubt the best and most economical truck of its capacity ever
offered Costs very
ating cost of about onehalf that of two teams.
prove to you the above statement.
We also have in stock a iarge
look them over before buying.

ATES

Automobiles and Gasoline Engines
N'T FAIL TO READ THE WINNINC RECORDS
F THE REO. WATCH FOR NEW RECORDS
be convinced that the
r REO SENSATION.
little more than a good team and will take the place of two of them, at an oper-
Ask
variety of new
and
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Reo is the best car for the money ever offered.
a day's demonstration and the machine will
for
second hand gasoline engines. Don’t fail to

LANDIS BROS., Rheems, Pa.
ARAMA AIS Ad ddd dd ddd

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:

CORR)!
best and newest styles for your Fall
The
Dress Goods Departments offer prettier fabrics and
Features of the Silk Vogue
Silk
of the
liked
Indian effects.
and
Vogue for East
Solid colors rule,
SILK CHIFFONS FOR DRAPING
Very soft and fine; fancy chiffon, with satin
border and shadow lace design; brown, coronation
blue, gray, coronation purple, $12.50 the pattern
i
the new tones are
=CT FABRIC
FASHION FOR FALL
dressmaking, are shown at
fabrics occupy strong positions this season,
Soft sheer silks
unusually
|

Hager's. The Silk and
greater variety than ever before.
and are richly
and
pretty.
of
are
expressive
draped effects
Some of the
the splendors
particularly
newest styles.
lead,
SATIN EFFECTS ESPECIALLY FAVORED
Jatin-faced silks have strong supremacy, as
foundations for veiled effects, for street and even-

five yards ;
GLACE TAFFETAS
Rich, changeable effects, purple-green and blue-
green: chiffon weight; 36 inches wide: $1.50 a
vard
AN EXCEPTIONAL SILK OFFERING
0 to b9c. Silks at 3%c. a yard
} t 1 1 « i
\n early season special purchase of neat and
dainty, pure silk messalines and taffetas; fine
tripes; 25 different styles including all colors;
for house and street dresses, walsts and trim-
nings: at this price more sconomical than cot-
tons; 19 inches wide
FOR TAILORED SUITS SCOTCH HEATHER
EFFECTS
Ihe smartest wool suitings are heavy mixed
Scotch cheviots in tain, vn, gray and green
affect Those rough in texture and mannish
of hos
weave have the referen
At $1.00 a yard , representative showil 0
Lt 3 1 yard;
tl suitin fabric 1 I ht shades 4
At $1.50 a rd r'( h Scotch Heather coat
ray reer tar nd brown mixtures LS

BEAUTIFUL SILK AND WOOL POPLINS
Soft and sheer; half shimmering lustre
hat is lastin in vogue for street frocks, house
es and evening gow! ight weight and
fine Blacl 1 azure, greel
delft and n 1¢
DAINTY WASH FLANNELS
or waists, kimonas., men's shirts and pajamas
childrer Adresse Half wool 30 inches
and 40c¢. a yard
BLACK FABRICS HIGHLY FAVORED
A ne black custome is almost necessity in
rs ns wardrobe black for even
finds a favored place and a coat or
is always attractive Only reliable grades
»

ing gowns, and for waists. For example.
PAILLE DE SOIE
n ‘dull satin finish; solid gold and garnet;
26 inches wide, and $1.00 a yard
+
3
can be found here Oe to $4.0 1 riest- oe
I nd others of the higl t 1(l¢ 3
od
BEPRESENTATIVE BLAC iS, 00 3
Storm Serge, Frencl ¢ 1 3
dominate the vogue for bl 1 ) x
Taffeta, Sheltona, Batiste \ 1ui-
sette, Voile, Ottoman Hem I
Crepe allo at $1.00. 4 t t 3
3
FREL DELIVER 3
; 3
Purchase $5.00 5
pre to ny tation 3
Hi: I Store &
3
Enjoy t L ure NG MA 3
CHINE ok
og
Musi t oh
pretty £ chest 1
niusic ithout en :
No othe 1 ( i
h unlimi i
red our he )\ i 3
e of 1a) the 1 1
stallment
VICTORS $10 TO $60 &
5
FAMOUS VICTOR VICTROLAS ¥
¥
board const: tic tead I
).00 3
&
adjust every 1 chine bef
partment so that ve ssur 3
he very 1 esults in tone and clearness >
-
&
OUR MUSIC LIBRARY
Contains the newest records well as an up-
to-date assortment of music for the player-piano.

5-31 West King Street.
HAGER & BRO,
LANCASTER, PA

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