FRED'K L. BAKER.
013RITTON & MUSSELUS im f
FAMILY DRUG STORE,
,Market Street, Marietta, Pa.
yiorT o:4 Sr, MUSSER, successors to Dr. F.
o e will continue the business at the old
, where they are daily receiving additions ,
°
neir s tock, which are received from the
sai '
'reli,,a,ebdre imp
sporters
tful and manufacturers.
i ecly ask a liberal share
ou
of pu blic p atronage.
Ths y are now prepared to supply the de
mand th public ivith everything in their
trAde e .
Their stock- of
DRUGS AND MEDICINES
111050 dSD rona, sr AV [WC JUST A RR( V ED. •
i Pi 3llinzs and IL 4 I I I OI I
10t1 MEDICINAL ONES ONLY,
ill THE POPULAR PATENT MEDICINES.
to Maio of all kinds, Fancy ud Toile t Fluid Ar
'Wool every kind, Alcohol a ic and,
g l i ra rts, Alcaloid and Resinoids, ail
the lest Trusses, Abdominal Sup
porters,Shoulder Bracestßreast
pumps, Nipple Shells and
Shields, Nursing Bottles,
A large supply of
TOOTH. NAIL AND CLOTHES BRUSHES.
kth powder and Pastes, Oils, Perfumery,
Cr'"b Bair Dyes, lavigoratora,_&c.; .
1,5114 , 13, Shades. Chimneys, Wick, &c,
riyaustis supplied at reasonable rates.
Ao,ssr,i nad Piescriptions caiefully aad we
coniponnded all hours of the-day and
Charles H. Britton, Vharmaceutist,
ail pay especial attention to this branch
fir bustling. Having had over ten years
t,.61 . I perierice in the drug business; ens
t. g uarantee twaire satisfaction to all
uo nay patronize the new firm.
6.issari's compound Syrup of Tar, o n
',A and for sale.
supply of School Books, Stationary,
&v.. always on hand.
SUNDAY HOURS:
to 10, a. m.,—12 to 2, and 6 to 6 p.
ii. Button. A Nurser.
Aeons, October 20, 1866. 11-tf '
& LIQUORS.
111.
1.1. D. BENJAMIN,
Dral VI IV
WINES & LIQUORS,
Nur of Front-at.. and Elbow Lane,
MARIETTA, PA.
DIGS leave to inform the public thal ht.
°will continue the WIN El Sr. LIQUOR Wilk.
befion till its branches. Re willconstantly
if , p oil hand all kinds of
;;-andieir, Wines, Gins, Irish and sesetelt
Whiskey, Cordials. Bitters, tc.,
BENI
Justly Celebrated Rose Whisky,
ALWAYS ON HAND.
vrry surerior OLD RYE WHISKEY.
ii received, which is warranted pure.
tT tll /L D. B. now asks of the pulic
VII awful examination of his stock and pri
x which will, he is confident, result in Ho
6 keepers and others finding it to their ad
to mate their purchases from him.
JACOB LIBRART, JR., - -
CABINET MAK.V.It
iNDERTAKKR, MARIETTA, PA
reninne
?d r: or in e gt e e t c fi
i i t l is lY e ta na k o l t th llvrtt
rd the public in general, that ,
. having laid in
lot of seasoned Lumber, m new pr epal{ed to
linufac tu re all kinds of
CA RINEY' FURNITURE,
r. , “.ty style and variety, at abort notice
has on hand a letof Furniture of his own
Nutufactu,e, water' for flue finish sad good
, olizacellip, will rival any City 'MS"'
1• Especial atteatiaa paid to repairing.
Ile is also now prepared to attend, in an its
~ .. I%iiclies , the U NIegRTAICING busineaa, be
310uPPlied with an excellent: Merge, large
afirt fliers, Cooling Born 864 .
CUF,FINS faie ed it' any etyle--plair
0 Drily.
are Roam and Mamtfactery. wear Mr.
''' l )hs new building, Dear tie Upper-Sta
,
Marsetus, Pa. root. 22.-
Opposite Me Butteitwoo4 Tree
11ERTZLER GUION,
(succEssons TO 3011 W itze.TzLza,
I' 'IPORTERS AND OEALERS IN WINES. AND
LIQUOR,
So. 821 _Market Strew,
PHILADELPHIA.
I 'RXT HUTZLER.] LOEO. A. GIIION
Jlishler's _Herb Bitters far sale
P irstliatialkal Bank of Marietta.
Tilts BANKING ASSOCIATION,RAVING COMPLETED IT$ OEGANIZATIOR
lb now prepared to transact all kinds of
BANKING BUSINESS:
ed 74 Bowl of Directors meet weekly, on
needay, for discount' and other business.
tnank Hours : ions 9A.xto3 P. M.
JOHN HOLLINGER, PREsnoraNT.
" ( OS BOWMAN, Cashier.
KEROSENE & GAS STOVES.
-x-- ,
T EA fr. COFFEE BOILERS, GLUE POTS,
OIL CANS, *C. 4.0
the cooking fora family may./Cg
done with Kerosenelhl. '
ith less trouble, and M less ex-org
:nee than any other fuel. ..117i
icle manufactured by this Company
steed to perform all that is
„claimed
EP Send for Circular.
Jere). Discount to the. Trade.
lOSENZ LAMP, IIEATEIVUOW
06 PEARL-ST, Nnw-Yoax.
EL G. BAKER,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
' LANCASTER, PA
:—No. 24 NORTH Duns Snit=
the Court Rouse, where he will at
the practice of his profession in Oita
branches.
Worristal;'
Surgeon Dentist,
~,,,,
LET STALL.; AnTomsei
ler & BicMs Stoic, SeCoi 1 14°").
IIf.ARZETTA, P 4.
ANDLORDS! Just received, 400°
Irish tir If I ff.K 1 _WilitUM
* pure, et 4. D. psrOnsitteArt
. „.. . . .
7 .. - i - 44 : -",, ,,, :! - , 7:- - - '•- t - a - - - li - y- - e - ....i - 7 1-- , 7 .-1-_,-- ---.. --+ . ..
......
. 1
. .....
.. , t . .
__.
. .
... 1 ,4 1 .
, .
+
. .
..r.;. .
. .
~ .
ME
rE12.81 - 8.
- -
-The Mariettian is published weekly;
at 1 ,1:50 a-year,,payable in advance. .
Office in "Lindsay's Building," near
the Post office corner, Marietta, Lan
caster county, Pa.
tisements wili . beinserted atthe
following rates : One square,tenlines
or less, 75 cents for the first thsertioi,
or three limes for 4150. Profession
al or Business Cards, of six lines or less,
$5 . a-year. Notices in the reading col
umns,ten cents a-line ; general adver
tisements seven cents-a-line for the first
insertion, and for"every additional in,
section, four cents. A liberal deduc
tion made to yearly advertisers.
Having put up a new .lobber,press
and added a large addition of job type,
cuts, border, etc. will enable the estab
lishment to execute every description, of
Plain and Fancy Printing, from, he
smallest card to the largest poster, at
short notice and, reasonable rates.
IF YOU SHOULD GET MARRIED.
If you should e'er get married, John
I'll tell yoU what to do—
Go get a little tenement,
Just big enough for two !
And One spare room for company,
And one space bed within it—
if you'd begin love's life aright,
You'd better thus begin it.
In furniture be moderate, John,
And let the stuffed chairs wait ;
One looking glass will do for both,
Yourself and loying mate ;
And Brussels, too, and other things
Which make a fine appearance,
Ifsod.cso better afford it, they
Wilt better look a year hence.
SOlllB think they must have pictures,
Superb and,costly, too; _ [John,
Your wife will he wpicture, John,
Let that &office See pea.•
Remember what the wise wan said,
A tent and love within it,
Is better than &splendid house
With bickerivs every =Lamle.
And one word as to cooking, John—
Your wife can do that best;
For love, to make the, biscuit rise,
Is better far than yeast.
No matter if each day you don't
Bring turkey to the table,
'Twill better relish by-and-by,
When you are better able.
Forall - you buy. pay money, John,
Money earned every day ;
If you would have your life run smooth,
There is no better way„
A note to pay is an ugly thing
( If thing you choose to call it ),-
W hen it hangs a'er a man who has
No money in his wallet.
AnVow when Au ate married, John,
DoKtry to.iitin'the rich ;
It took them many , a toilsome year ,
To gain their _envied niche
And if you'd gain the summit, John,
Leek , well to your beginning,
And then will,all,you win repay
The care' nd toil •of winning.
NEW Novin.s.—An English reviewer
says that he 'has seen it stated that
"eight new novels appear:weekly"—that
is to say—one every day and two for
Sunday. The reviewer thinks this is
mistake—that only one, new novel ap
pears, perhaps inlen years`; ell the rest
are imitations. "And then, after a.
time, the writers imitate and paroay
themselves." '
lir A would.be. gentleman the other ,
day Called et the post.office r and-display
ad hilt ignorene e ' of na t ur al history or the
.
French language, • or both , by requesting
to lie suilietwith a stamped !tantelope.'t
iii' A sailor being asked'how he liked
his bride, replied, "Why, , d'ye.see, LOA
her for to be only.half of me, as the ,par 7
son says, bet dash-.me if shw is&t twice
as mucli.ast, Vm,only a tar; but she is
a-Tarter.
When once . infidelity4mapersoade
men'that they,ehill die like besets. they'
he-bvenpkt 4V _live like, lmiete,
2ka alikreptinut yonstdania - *anal for At 'ffionte
.MARIETTA,,__v4,: SATURDAY, JANUARY 26, ~q,
A:VISITOR;.
...ftetraager came
Unto my door,
kleaßked lay name,
And nothing more.
'Teas nice for me,
in that strange place,
So soon to see
So kied a face.
My hopes fell tat;
He said, "I axes,"
And touched hie hat,
"For unpaid taxes."
Gr-It is tutitor,il Oat torelNio 2tlioilo
aod 'Fir& :troops or to radian la .,
lit k kfi c ß a q! , ! 111°1 4 13 .0* 1 '94 4 - 4 .1 t4 1 109.0
43SCItaill' hie NAPiI I 4, t.,
For the Mariettian.
FEMALE INTOXICATION,CONTINUED.
In a former article we adverted to the
fact that ,domkenness• has Immune sadly
prevalentienotel alone among men, but
even in the circle of the gentler sex. It
is a sad, sad truth—for truth it eiidently
is, according to reiiable testimony and
observation. We promised to notice a
few of the causes of this new and terrible
feature of the monster vice, new, in, that
it has reached across the threshold •of
the higher circles of life ;—and terrible in
that in lays its ruthless hand upon the
dearest and holiest ties of life.
1. A prominent cause of this deplor
able evil lies in the fact that ladies of
respectable society are beginning to
think that their pantries and cellars are
not properly furnished without their
casks and bottles of domestic wines.
Then, fashionable society is fast return
ing to the old custom of having wine
dispensed at parties, weddings, suppers,
&c. The decanter, the wine glasses, aid
their accompaniments of the old fashion
ed side board, are beginning to usurp a
quiet dominion over many a household,
where a few years ago, the inmates
would have been shocked at the sight.
Mothers thus often encourage, perhaps
unwillingly, not only their sons, but also
their daughters to sip the tempting cup.
Young ladies entice young men with
their bewitching smiles to drink their
health and praise their beauty over the
sparkling glass. The consequence is
that not only do eons and brothers, hus
bands and lovers learn to " indulge "
fieely, many of whom bat for these syren
enchaptressee would never taste it; bat
the fair creatures themselves learn to
" lovo it So dearly," that, with the nat
ural warmth of their nature, they come,
at last, to worship at the shrine of Bac
chus with all the enthusiasm of a-wom
an's devotion.
2. We cannot but think that the in
discriminate, and often unwise prescrip
tion of stimulants, to ladies who may be
afflicted with slight infirmities and tem
porary prostrations, is another fruitful
source of Obi evil. We do not pretend
to dictate. We know this is delicate
ground. We smug prepared to decide
against all stimulants as some have done.
But simply suggest that ladies as well as
Gents, may. "use, a ,tittte [too much] wine
for their-stomach's sake, and for their
often infirmities:" Verbum sat.
3. It has been suggested, and we
doubt not with reason, that mach of the
evil which we so earnestly deplore, may
owe its origin to the scenes of unwonted
excitement and anxious suspense
through which manylemales both young
and old, have been caused to pass, during '
the four long years of oar bloody nation
al struggle. But we cannot enlarge.
God - bless our mothers, wives, sisters,
daughters, and "keep them from the evil."
W. F.
,
genie Any :wk .-4S o use one
_sus
"Clirje, let,us tell -yen a stubborn,trith I
A. young woman never looks ,so well to
a sensible young man, as when dressed
iniiplain,neat, modest attire, without
it single ornament - about her permin.
She koala then as though Ole possessed
worth in herselk and needed no artificial
rigging to enhance her value. If a
young woman would spend as much time
in cultivating her mind, training her
temper, and cherisking kindness, meek
ness, mercy, and other g_oednnalitiesiati
most of them extra dress and ornaments
to increatnytheir personal charms, she
would at a glance, be •known among
thousand her character would be read
.
in, her conntenance."
A, well droned fellow .walked into
room where they, were talking ,politics
d =stretching himself up_ to . hie - full
height, exclaimed, in a loud' voice : •
" Whem, is the Radical 7, ,show me _ ,a
Radical gentleman, and I will ehow you
a liar." ' .
In an instant a man exclaimed :
U I am 'a Radical, sir."
" You are t'
Yea Mr I am."
Woll,juet, lon step round the:earner,
with me, and I'll shown you s fellow who
said aouldn't.,llo_s ,Budical in the
ward. Ain't he,e, lier, , l, about& Ilite
know Y"-
-
-
Deturßwift one daywherr a leg
of mutton, very much overdone, 'had
been brought to lahle?—vioging the
,bell;
directed, theckott to tulil at 91,41n; ,, Ai1l
do iti tem."'
"I.HVStid* - ''''' ;•
Floating down to realms below,
Through the chilly air of night,
And, 'midst etruggling.beame of light,
Sifting,
Drifting,
Come the airy Ulan of enow. -
Now the moon shinee cold and pale;
And the frost's pure crystal! fall
On the mead and lonely Wall, .
Bea Ming,
Gleaming,
Where the wind-tossed'branches wail
Soon Hesperia's realms mill glow
Through the eloud-roof'd tent of night,
Al the splintered shifts of light,
Glimmering,
3-~ Shimmering,
Gild the smooth White fields of snow.
A MOTHER'S LOVE.
Happily, a mother's love is something
upon which the great majority of man
kind can look bacir—revereritly and
fondly look back—for an objective rep
resentntion of its main characteristics.
Oh, the unselfishnees of it I How,
months before it can be returned by
scything beyond a momentary dance of
light in her child's eyes, or a curvature
of ill toothless month into a smile, or a
crow, or fling of the limbs, expressiie
of enjoyment, it poursltself out in seem
ingly wasteful superabundance, intent
upon giving rather than receiving, re
joining to minister rather than to be
ministered to, aecepting without a 'mur
mur days of care sometimes flecked with
pain, and nights of broken rest, and ren
dering without stint unnumbered ser
vices which to othnis would be eelf-tie
nisi, but the irksomeness of 'which her
ever gushing affection, without a mo
.ment's Pause of Self consciousness,
cleanses away, and readers invisible !
And then tip patience and long 13tiffer
hug of it,=tlie faults it will co '
v'er over
with its ever ready mantle, the negli
gences it will drop tears over ,in secret
and openly forgive, the affronts it will
survive, the disappointments it will en
dure and conceal, the ingenuity it will
display in devising plausible excuses and
even satisfying reasons for manifest
wrongs, and the eagerness with which
it will take upon itself, if possible, the
consequences of transgression. There
is nothing quite like it in this world of
ours—nothing so morally beautiful ;
self-fed, self-sustaitking love, which can
traverse wide deserts, and, like , the
camel, keep itself alive upon its little
hoards of remembered,joy, when all oth-
er love fails—the one human love that
spends itself wholly opon its objects,
and the roots of which,even ingratitude
cannot entirely kill. Bat, when return
ed, as in some measure it mostly will be
to what , strength , and beauty of self-sac
rifice will it not grow I—yet, under any
circumetancen, chiefly a sorrow bearing
love, of which the joys
. are wes t the;
duties are inflictions of pnin upon itself,
the pride ,is nourished to be hestowed,
elsewhere, andAhe fondest gain is the
Sorest loss. *bout everylome:,mother
thore is tkosanctity of martyrdom7-and
when she is no more in the body, ,her
children see her with-the ring of light
around her head.
Wsler is 13r i eurr I . — !? Socrates called
lieautli is short-lived tyranny; Plato, a
privilege of, nature .;, Theophrastue, a
silent cheat;, Tneocritus, a. delightful
prejudice. Domitiewsaid that nothing
was more grateful than beauty ; Aris
totle said that beauty was better than
all the letters of recormiendation in the
,
world ; Horner declared that it will ft
glorious gift of nature ; end - Ovid,
ingcto him, Willett faiorlestowed by
the . Ode. The wisest of - men has left
hie inspired 'declaration that, " Favor it
deceitful and beauty is vain; but a wom
an that fearsthl,he she shall be
praised." ,
4 WOMAN'S Wbas.-iltichelet • says :
The bondage of &Wiese &bike - man,
and often Tinders hini coarse and avert
clone. WaianNi, Which does not'absorb
her mind„ is like the Woof to the web of
ttr' . the weaves upon It' the
Household matters Whi4 man, engaged
in business, has not thought . of, and she
dreams :shoat ,`thei fatoru." Still, tbere
are American' women seem longing
to do man's work, avow if it makes theta
coarse-and avaricious.
Ai...There ii depger in being to neat.
iidd, in old lady in . fiolfegdzeiAblied
her eittipg-rpom leer 'fell
throughit.liitctkee•Yar— . _
dOett
sr ST 1.4 a r ,
mom than Alexandlf, Isere 1,
world.
A'll4
liur:'4l;ia7tl9 . ) ink ,li iticl jki .Ir,l 4'g
MENEM
:rllil* Egli.' .1
,12 , 11-rtiz;-
=
! ''''"'" l ' f ' - ` ''" ' BOOK t. 4 ' l, 1 tu ,o i :'-r,
Allesiingfaii the ptintar'Siirt!
Books are the" Mentors of the heart.
The burning soul, theufdened mind
In 'books alone Compel:llona find.
We neverspeak- our deepest feelings,
Oar holiest hoPes• have no revealings,
Save in the gleams that light the face,
Or fancies that the pen may trace , ;
,And hence to books the heart must turn .
When with unspoken thoughts we yearn;
And, gathar. from the, silent page
The just reproof, the counsel sage,
The consolations kind and true
That soothe and heal .the wounded
heart,
Aeon the broken plant the dew
Calle forth fresh leaves and buds to view
More lovely as the old depart.
A ROMANTIC LOVER.
A romantic story is told, of an English-
man who sought the hand of a very
charming lady with .whom ,he was pas
sionately in love, but who constantly
refused him. As he had , reason to be
lieve she loved him, he entreated, to
know the reason why she refused her
consent to their union. The lady, sub•
dried by his Constancy, tolffhith that her
only motive for refusing him was, that
having by. <accident lost a leg, it had
been replaced by-a wooden.one, andshe
feared that sooner , or later -this circum
stance would chill his affection for her.
This she declared to be her only motive.
The lover protested that would never
,
make him change ` his love ; but she per
sisted in refusing to marry hiM. Fired
with love and determined that nothing
should obstruct his design, ha Ainder the
pretest, of, going a distant voyage, left
the lady and hastened to. Paris, where
he had one of his legs , amputated.
When he had recovered, he returned to
London, went to the lady, and told her
that there *as no oiiitaiiit to their =Mb;
forthit he was equally
, mutilated with
herself. The 'lady , con quered "'by sari
a proof of affection, at last "consented to
marry him.
A Miransa's SoN.—Speaking of
sleighing, we are reminded' of an v inci
dent which occurred in the experience
of a wild youninian, a elergyman's'eon,
and the eons of clergymen have ever
been"notedfor their wildness. He has
sown his wild oats and. acquired consid
erable distinction in the political world
since , the incident we are about to ,re
late which occurred in hie eighteenth
year. -
He had procured a fast horse and
sleigh, but a rather slow harness, and
invited a fair daresel to accompany him
on a sleigh ride the ceuntry. The
sleighing was fine, with the exception of
some heavy drifts. Our hero drove furl
°risky, and managed, when in the vicinity,
of a farm house, to plunge into a big
pile of inow, and by pullipg his - horse
sharp around to capsize_: 'kid into
'the' heap, and break} iliettarriess into
hitters., He picked up'llie ifiaguiests,
and Mind he could proceed-no ?farther:
• without borrewinganother Wanes s. •He
applied to the proprietor of the adja
cent farm house - for the loan ofa harness.
" I have a spare liarness," said the
honest and shrewd farmer—" I have a
harness, but—"
He eyed the youth simply and hesi
tated, as if he doubted `the expedienCy
,
of trusting his property with a "flighty"
young man. Our hero understood' the .
look, and shouted, in his impatience :
" Give me the harness, I tell you ;
damn it, my ,father's a minister I"
Rivas in Connecticut, where a minis
ter's son could be denied nothing he
might ask tie ; and the harness was
soon transferred to our young friend's
steed, and he went his way rejoicing.
-A Mena . reporter
WaB BrOIIIIILIUntiDg Oconee for a friend
and,salled io see a family who were pre
paring to vacate a cozy dw elling. As
the door stood open, reporter walked in
without knocking t and his'eyes Straight-
Way lighted upon the data! of the house
'Wit; was #akiiii tauntes
with broomstick some object under
the bed. • '
"goodinoreing, madam. Ah I you
have a trOublesome cat nnder the bed ?".
' *Troubleilome cat ?—no,: sir t TVs
ttiet hutliniit t d brminel end I'll
have him out or break eveiy-boie hit
body!" , , - •
:You will, ell?". said a faint voice
MIPTA.3 ) / 4 4• , .: . iW tt.., 891 .1 1 ~1 2 1 I Y,
PROtitllOgulldi and JP* slit We.
but VlLbe
,dogged, if pinata° out from
under this bed . uAileltqe, go# the of
ilikano:o9.lolof • .; .:is
117'1%6 "Onitifresiellbsitotts , toukiiittaz
2C! TY a *ll
gild
VOL. XIII.-NO. 25.
"Please, sir," said a snub nose girl,
- fourteen years old, to a country dealer
in dry goods, "to send mamma the pat
terns of your calicoes, and put 'em cheap
for she is going to get a new gown soon,
and wants to see what'll wash."
"-Who ie your mamma?"
"lty mamma is Aunt Oily Dee, sir."
" Your deter was here yesterday, and
took patterns of all I have." ,
"Yes sir, I know that; but then she
sewed them all up for patchwork, and
would not give me any, but told me to
go shopping myself." •
Stuart, the celebrated portrait painter
once met a lady in the street, in Boston'
who saluted him with, "ab, Mr. Stuart, I
have just seen.your miniature, and kissed
it because it was so much like you.'
"And did it kiss you in return?" "Why,
no." "Then," said 'Stuart, "it was not
like me."
"Hear me, my friend. Yesterday I
was called an ass by Mr. Jones, andj. in
tend to prosecute him for it. What do •
you think cliff" "If I were you I would,
not do It." "Why?" "Because he might
prove tkn charge, and that would com
promise you."
"Where are you going so fast Mr.
Smith ?" demanded Mr. Jones. Home
sir, home, don't detain me ; I have just
bought toy wife a new bonnet, and I
must deliver it before the fashion
changes."
"Do yon see that fellow lounging there
doing nothing ?" said Owen to Jenkins
the other day. "How does he live ? by
his wits ?" "0, no ; he's a cannibal!"
"yes, a cannibatl—he lives on ether peo
ple."
The following is one of Josh Billings
best sayings : "A man running for office
puts me in mind of a dog that's lost ; he
smells of everybody he meets, and wags
himself all, over."
What is the earliest mention of a bank
ing transaction? When Pharaoh recei
ved a check (cheque) on the Bank of the
Red Sea, which was crossed by Moses
and Aaron.
Thirteen objections were once given
by a young lady for declining a match—
the, firat twelve being the suitor's twelve
children, and the thirteenth the suitor
himaulf.
A sentimental young man thus feel
ingly expresses himself, " Even as na
ture berievolently guards the rose with
thorns,so doeslshe endow woman with
pins."
A mizileriiietcti says that the great
est gifevonehsafed to a living man was
.thet"granted to Adam, as he was blessed
with a wife without having a mother-in.
law.
-A Timone editor complains that he
has , recently seen banks shaving their
papei. We once saw a bank director
actually shaving himself.
An Irish editor, in speaking of the mis
eries of Ireland, says : "Her cup of mis
ery has for ages been overflowing and
is not yet full."
:Lucy Stone, in a lecture in Bangor
recently, maid : "We hear of hen-pecked
husbands, but nothing at all about roos
ter-Pecked wives.
' " If, sir," said a hospitable Irishman
to his friend,' "yon ever come within a
mile of my house, I hope you will stop
there."
“ I do not say that man will steal V'
said a witness on trial, ” but if I was a
chicken I'd roost high when he was
around."
Why are washerwomen often very
foolish ? Because they set out tube to
catch soft water when it is raining hard.
In the beginning woman consisted of
a single rib. Now she's all.ribs from her
belt to the rim of her petticqats.
Tobacco is being talked much about ;
in fact, it is in almost everybody's
Mouth.
Every person complains of the badness
of his memory, but none of his defective
jndgement.
Why have the ladies' hoops grown so
emeh this-winteo Boutin cold weath
erldwaye contracts steel.
Why is a money-loaner like a man row
ing a boatY Sesame be relies on his
ewers:
= The •heigbt of impudenee—Taking
*Ater fieralbe rain in an umbrella shop.
Ac elepbantle a poweiful animal, but
the smallest deg sea lick him.
;
Stuff for Smiles.
A