BY FRED'K L. BAKER. 0, pt: lei, %Jinn ink iiranStrrattr. Mores most respectfully take this meatukof w aiv ing has friends and the publia generally, that he has commenced the drawing of . DEEDS, MORTGAGES, JUDGMENTS', od la fact everything in the Cos veyeircizoo line. flaring gratuitous intercourse with a somber of the Lancaster Bar, he will be ena bled to execute legal instruments, of writing with accuracy. Er lie can be n foud at the office of " Trim WILTTIAN,"--"Llldnari Building? (sec ad door) neat the Poet Office corner, or at his residence on Market street, half 'a square west of the " Donegal House," Marietta. rßlank Deeds, Mortgages, Judgments and beset always on hand and for Sale. sLEXA Isr s t ion L a r b i e g MAY, , in ia " 1111.1.111 r Boot and Shoe Manufacturer, ORKET STREET, MARIETTA, PENN Would most respectfully Inform the citizens of this Borough and neighborhood that he has the largest assortment of City made work in li line of busineee in this Borough, and be a practical BOOT AND SHOE MAKER Pimielt,itiensblea to select with more judgment than those who are not. He continues to man ufacture in the very beat manner everything is de BOOT AND SHOE LINE, which he yin warrant lot neatness and good fit. rrCell and examine his stack before pra ttling elsewhere. THE BEST OF THE MONTHLIES.— MS LADY'S rararin—devotedta LASH -103 and LITERATURE. Beautiful Steel Egroings. SPLENDID DOUBLE-SIZED COL OM FASHION PLATES. The Latest patterns cf Dui" Cloaks, Bonnets, Embroidery &c., Ifoulebold receipts, Music, &c. Wheeler & Wilson , ' sewing Machines given as premium& in 15 cents for a sample copy to DEACON IPETERSON, 319 Walnut-at., Philadelphia firat National Bank of Marietta THIS BANKING ASSOCIATION RAMO COMPLETED ITS ORGANIZATION I; •;,:m prepared to transact all kinds of BANKING BUSINESS: The Board of Directors meet weekly, on Wednesday, for discount and other business. allank Hours : From 9A.31t03 P. M. JOHN HOLLINGER, PRESIDENT. AMOS BOWMAN, Cashier. ROWARD (SSOCIATION. PHILADELPHIA, PA, bosses of the Urinary aid Sexual Systems, -s see sod reliable treatment. Also, the MUM CRAMBES, an Essay of warning and Instruction, sent in settled envelopes, free of darge, Address, Dn. J. SKILLIN HOVCRTON, Howard Association, No. 2 South Ninth-et., PsdadeLoh's, Ps. [jan.l,'6s-Iy. INTEREST ON DEPOSITS. —o— First National Bank of Marietta, January 10, 1866. CAPITAL, - - - $lOO,OOO SURPLUS FUND, - - 022 5 228:70 This Bank will pay 61 per centum interest ter deposits made for one year. 3111, 1 AMOS BOWMAN, Cashier. DR. J. Z. H.OFFER, DENTIST, ^ Or rut BALTIMORE COLLEGE /1 1411,4 OF DENTAL SURGERY, LATE OF HARRISBURG. OF F I CE:--Front street, next door to R. Williams' Drug Store, between Locust ia4 Walnut streets, Columbia. - RIMEL G. BAKER, 11 ATTORNEY AT LAW, , PA. OFFICE;—No. 24 NORTH LANCASTER DUKE STREET 9PEiti the Court House, where he will at tool to the practice of hie profession in all its wine branches. ➢A, WM. B. FAHNESTOCK, OFFICE;-.MAirt-syr., NEARLY orrOSITE 3 Fatigier & Patterson's Store. F2O/1117 TO 8 A. M. OFFICE Roußal " TO2. " 6To7P. M• THE MASON & HAMLIN Cabinet Organ;, "Ir different styles, adapted to sacred and eclat MUSIC, M for $BO to $6OO each. FrFTY °N ./ Gold or Silver Medals, or other-first pre- Melavarded them. Illustrated Catalog_ue , 141 foe. Address, blasoa ITAxI. III 2 "ofi" 40 or MASON BROTHERS, New-York. 8 9ame r D, 186.1-Iy.] A TTENTION I SPORTSMEN!! tleY's Gun Caps, Eters Waddsi , 1 1?nt's Sporting aad Glazed Duck Powder, militate Shot • Shot Pouches, Powder Flasks, JOHN SPANGLER'S., COLGATE'S TOILET SOAPS.. li i IIIt " I y, Clynerine Palm Almond , Bathand Shinn SOAPS: Equal to any imported. inn teceived end for esle, very che at THE GOLDEN M ORTAR. cliSSng Shawl. Bih non d i. Gloves,HosierY s ki elte and Bunks, Embreddereliandker -7k i l4 lind N y Collate, Mon ping Collars and A full lliad ets and Dress Trimmings* • suppl a t SPANGLER: k RICH'S. ACHOICE Lot of Books for children called iiadtstructable Pleasure Books ; School and klltt,,t Books, Stationary, Pens, Pen holders LANDIS & TROUT. c4 / 11 /oy purposerrrenteid j(2/ P RINTING of every deeexiption ett b t Olftl With niattleals Ind al/Batch at the ` e l QI The Mariettlazi. PLOICE HAVANA REG A RS, sad the Chewing and Smoking Tallnect at WOLFENL A LARGE LOT OF Bub F Oa% !li.Angs inniarkably low prices edi ' 114 4 1 f .frriatFlrA• 11'WE7 „, I Cele ea Pea 1: flatted: aid uu Peale Blecl a i t ng at • • - " tgAPT-41004' IMMO' (at 41(44 li4itejl 414;4' II 17:s edam AZP2fl;,' titl - 1 1 ati't-tt: PUBLISHED WEEKLY AT ONE DOLLAR AND A HALF A YEAR PAYABLE IN ADVANCE Office in " LINDSAY'S BUILDING," second floor, on Elbow Lane, between the Post Office Corner and Front-St., Marietta, Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. ADVERTISING RATES: One squire (10 lines, or less) 75 cents for the first insertion and One Dollar and-a-half for 3 insertions. Pro fessional and Business etude, of six lines or less at $5 per annum. Notices in the reading col umns, ten cents a-line. Marriages and Deaths, the simple announcement, FREE; but for any additional lines, ten cents a-line. A liberal deduction made to yearly a nd half yearly advertisers. Having just added a " NEWBURY MOUN TAIN Tousta 'PRESS," together with a large assortment of new Job and Card type, Cuts, Borders, &c., &c., to the Job Office of " TEE MARIETT/AN . ," which will insure the f ne and speedy execution of all kinds of JOB & CARD PRINTING, from the smallest Card to the LARGEST POSTER, at reasonable prices. GO ASK MY MOTHER You've told me many a time and oft That I was fair and comely; My eyes were bright—my tressea soft, While other girls were homely. " She's suite young to know her will," The folks say to each other ; Bat if you truly love me still= Why—go_ask my mother, I'm told there's care in married life, That all the joy's in courting; When young men have secured a wife, They say their vows are spotting. I won't believe what old maidesay, If you wab't choose another ; You've bothered me so much to-day tin —go and ask my mother. BREAD AND BUTTER.---SOLDO fellow en amored of a young lady named Anna Bread, dropped the folloviing from his pocket :-- "While belles their lovely graces spread, And fops around them gutter, I'll be content with A atm Bread, And won't have any but ker." Tug CHARitISD.—Let the wife only understand •and have faith in her true position—that of woman " the helper" —and she needs neither great gifts, nor an expansive mind, nor extraordinary beauty, to be always charming to her husbasd, and while she walks by his Bide, to—" Fill all the stops of life with music." In being literally his " help meet" she becomes the beautifier and healer of his life. If the vine about the oak tree, to which she is often compared be truly her emblem, it is because she binds together the broken boughs and drapes with verdurous loveliness the withered branches. ARGUING WITS A W OMAN .—"Yott must admit, doctor," said a witty lady to a celebrated doctor of divinity, with whom she was argiiing the question of the "equality of the sexes"--'you mast ad mit that woman was created before man 1" "Well, really, madam," said the astonished divine, " I mast ask you to 'prove your case.' " " That can be easi ly done, sir. Wasn't Eve the first maid 7" (made.) A 'story is told •of an inveterate drinker who signed a temperance pledge but was found soon after imbibing as of ten as ever. to his friends who remon strated with him he replied, that the document which be signed was invalid, because it had no internal revenue stamp. sr Every woman has a right to think her child the " prettiest little baby in the world," and it would be the greatest folly to deny ber this right, for she would be sure to take it. er An exchange says when the load of Massachusetts women reaches Oregon it is proposed to found a city and call it She-cargo. Squie one says, "God save the fools, and don't let 'em rnn out, for if it warn't for them wise men couldn't get a living." .', ilar Every woman has a right to be what age she pleases, for if she were to state her real age, no one would believe her. fir A Chicagoan aPplies for a divorce, because his wife proves to have a cork leg. She ma he •know it. oir Every young lidy hae a - ..41 - git to faint when she pleases, if her lofeile-by • . hen Sib to oateh her. - •' - Elierg msa whotaarmaa Sal idiot ellai”lfSt iitifta s tr tow chatt - biilo4: " 5 gitkpar tut Valtsilliania goarnat for Qt Nome Cult. MARIETTA, SATURDAY MORNING, MARCH 3, 1866. Centuries have come and gone since the Greek physician said gout was a dis ease none but the gods could understand. Generatien after generation of Galen's successors have lived and died, and the great opprobrium still awaits its Jeuner. Not la ne of all the masters of the heal ing art have earned the monument as high as St. Paul's, as wide as Thames, and as lasting as time, which Johnson declared should be erected to the dis coverer of a panacea for the gout. Something, though not much may have been done to mitigate the torment, the fit may be shortened, the pain perhaps alleviated, but at the best, drugs only. afford temporary relief. Occasionally, the malady yields at early dietetic and hygienic treatment ; but if once it has fixed its fangs on one arrived at man's estate, it must be considered incurable. Shakespeare makes Lord Posthumous in a sore strait say : Yet I am better Than ohe that's sick o' the gout.; since he had 6 rather roan so in perpetuity than be cured :y the sure physlciaa—Death ; and the lapse of three hundred years has not weakened the force of the compari son one whit. The intractability of a disease may always be measured by the variety of remedies propounded for its relief. At one time, doctors sought to conquer gout with acids ; at another, they were ,all for alkalies. Hippocrates, and in later times, Sir W. Temple, advocated cauterisation, or burning with crude flax ; while water was the fashionable agent fifty years ago. When Elizabeth's Lord Burleigh was laid up with the gout, the Archbishop of Armagh besoughl him to prove the efficacy of a remedy he had brought out of Dutehland ; and if it was as effectual as it certainly was nasty, the Lord Treasurer ought never to have complained again. Here is the recipe : "Take two spaniel whelps.of two days old, scald them, and cause the entrails to be tjken out, but wash them not. Take four ounces brimstone, four ounces turpentine, one ouncespermaceti, a hand ful of nettles, and a quantity of oil of balm, and put all the aforesaid in them stamped,-and serve them up, and roast them, and take the drops, and anoint you where your grief is." Laud recom mended Strafford to run up and down in the dew. Cardinal Zinzendorif bathed his legs every morning in pig's blood. Horace Walpole was advised to cut his nails in hot water, but found more bene fit from his bootikens and .a decoction of-dock-roots. A. humerous victim to the "friendly earnest of fourscore," well nigh pestered to death by the advice of sympathising friends, made a note of all their infallible recipes, and found that, to insure a cure, he ,must dose himself with colchicum, carbonate of soda, buck bean tea, ether, sulphur, magnesia, and gin ; and apply cabbage-leaves, treacle, castor oil, leeches, and steam to his troubled members, after rubbing them well with oil of swallows, mustard, vine gar, and vitriol. Then, if he refrained from vegetables, and gorged hithseli with cucumbers and onions, ate no meat and lived generously, avoided wines and spirits, and took abundance of gOod rum and brandy, wrapped himself in flannel, and went lightly clothed, used a flesh brush, and avoided touching the affected parts, and carried a magnet in his one pocket, and a potatoe in another, be might defy the gout, and live happy ever afterwards; bbt with the obstinacy pe culler to gouty subjects, this invalid with many friends said, as a modern statesman paid when a wine-merchant re commended his cheap claret as a pana cea: " Iprefer the gout." Gout was once thought pre-eminently aristocratic ; a rich man without the gout is one of Rosalind's examples of whom time ambles withal. - Dr. Syden ham consoled himself with the reflection that gout killed more' rich than poor, more wise than simple: "Great kings, emperors, generals, admirals, and phil osophers have. All died of the gout- Hereby nature shows . her impartiality, since those whom she favors in one way she afflicts in another." If this was more than a half-truth in Sydenham's day, it is no longer so. Goat has be come more democratic, and fevers all classes with his visits. Something may he owing to the change in the habits of the upper classes pritje.men,do not now guat.drutilt upcm p.o.rt and sherry, pesver fnl provocatives of gout. Spirit:drink -era are notliablato it, but excessive in dulgence in strong malt liquors is one ?gf'tbe suresemeihods.otobtainiog an irr- , ,trodiactioa to this enemyvor mitilf e ind ;: The Gout and the worst of it is, gout is _not con tent with punishing the original offend der, but wreaks its vengeance upon his descendants. .Dr. Garred was consulted by a patient, who told him that, for up wards of four hundred years, the gout had laid hold of the representative of his family as soon as ever he came into possession of the estate. Dr. Cullen was of the opinion that all gout was he reditary, so that he must have believed the tradition that Adam died of heredi tary gout. Modern authorities do not go quite so fir, but they agree that in three out of five cases, gout has been inherited. No wonder, then, that Hor ace Walpole grumbled at becoming its victim, spite of his virtue and leanness. After comically. describing himself as wrapped in flannels like the picture of a MOrocco ambassador, he says: "If either my father or mother had had it, I should not dislike"it so much. I am herald enough to approve it, if descend ed genealogically ; but it is an absolute upstart in me, and what is more provok ing, I had trusted to my great abstinence 1 for keeping me from it ; but thus it is. If I had any gentleman-like virtue, as {patriotism and loyalty, I might have got something by them ; I had nothing but that beggarly virtue temperante, and she had not interest enough to keep me from a fit of the gout. Another plague. is, that everybody that ever knew any body that had it, is so good as to come with advice, and direct me how to man age it ; that is, how to continue to have it for a great many years." Where a predriposition for gout ex ists, a fit may be induced by the most contradictory causes. One man obtains it from a glass of port ; another, with a draught of lemonade ; while a glass of ale will suffice with a third. - Kingsley's pet northeast wind excites it in some cases ; a mathematical problem has been known to produce it ; and it has often followed from sudden cold, the drawing of a tooth, or 1 es of. blood. IL is this uncertainty that baffles Medical art ; what may cure in one case, may kill in another. A victim who was racked with torture by a glass of wino, found peace in a glass of verjuice ; a Water-drinking lawyer found succor in wine ; while a wine-bibbing brother obtained relief from milk. A German inn.keeper was cured by having his feet, nailed to a block ; a Genevan, by a mad-woman rushing into his inom, and knocking his feet together ; and Hone tells as how a mad bull gave chase to a gouty old gen tleman, and frightened his malady away for ever. In the belief that the gout suffered no rival disease near its throne, a bishop once vainly offered a thousand pounds to any one who could put him in the way of . having a fit. It was also popu larly supposed to lengthen life, and it is true enough that its subjects very often attain to great age, in spite of its attacks. M. Quartier, physician to the Duke of Bouillon, had a sixty years' acquaint anceship with ~the gout, yet at ninety he walked firmly, and did not die till he was a hundred years old to the very hour. Nor are living examples wanting of the vigor men may retain to advanced age, to whom the goat is a regular visi tor. One I!,iisaUrus wrote a strange little book in Honor of the Goat, with the avoned object of proving that it was a blessing for which mankind could not be thankful enough. He sets about his dif ficult task so heartily, that it is some. what difficult to guess whether he is serious or satirical ; and the reader is in doubt whether he should laugh at or with him. After Vindicating the anti quity of his subject, as something young er than the fall of Adam, sent down from heaven mercifully to lengthen the life forfeited by man's transgresSion, our au thor proceeds to give six good reasons why gout should be ranked among the blessings of earth. Firstly, it gives a man pain without danger. Secondly, it is no constant companion, but allows its friends lucid intervals, in which they experience a deliciotis enjoyment of health, unknown to those who pass through lif6 without an ailment. Third. ly, it is a perpetual weather-guide, ever ready`for nse, in comparison with which your barometers and thermometers are worthless instruments; and our gout defender predicts that, if its signs are properly studied, the time would come when no shipoiVner would consider his vessel safe unless commanded bye gouty captain. Fourthly and fifthly,_ only_ people are nnplagned with headaches, and `invulnerable' to fever;'and lastly, .gout is incurable; 41. does not go so -3, faWas to assert that gout will render its poriessers actually imaiortal, altheuih it often keeps a man alive till his friends are weary of him ; but.he maintains that it - Paracelus had the power of making men proof against the shafts of death, hie secret consisted in inoculating them with gout. As to the objection, that gouty people do die, he answers that they do BO because they are ignorant fools, who do not know when they are well off; but moat needs be curing the gout, and therefore deal with Death's factor, the physician. "Let every one bear hie own.burden ; the gout has noth ing to do with the carnage of the doe': tor." If we could trust the Regiatrar-gener. al's Reports, gout is not answerable for more than one death in every seventeen hundred ; but the insurance companies reckon the fatality of the disease at a much higher, rate, placing it among their worst enemies. Sir B. Brodie has left, it on record that a large proportion of patients coming to lifin with so-called local diseases, were really suffering from the influence of gout os the system, al though free from anything which com monly passes for gout. Heat seems to be antagonistic to this mysterious dis ease ; it is far oftener met with in -tem perate than in warm climates, and pre vails more in spring and autumn than during the hot summer months ; but diet seems to have more to do with goat than anything_ else, and as malt liquors stand first on the black• list of gout-producers, we fear the disease will never be rare in a land of beer and ale. CHILDREN When a child is hurt, never hush it. Hall's Journal of Health says, it is inexcusable barbarity : it is repressing its instinct ; and for this rea son if physical punishment is indicted upon a child it is perfect brutality. A thousand times better is it to soothe by kindly words and acts, divert - the mind by telling stories, by explaining pictures, or by providing it with new toys. We have many a time in our professional experience as to sick children, found more benefit to be derived from a bean tiful or interesting toy than from . a dose of physic. The greatest humanity a mother can exhibit in respect to her sick child is to divert it, divert it, DIVERT IT, in all pleasing ways possible, as we ourselves, who are larger children, feel sometimes really sick, when a cheerful face and much loved friend has come in, and before we know it we have forgotten what was the matter with us. TO RELIEVE THE FEET,---Blilliolll3 may be checked in their early developement by binding the joint with adhesive plas ter and keeping it on as long as any Un easiness is felt. The bandaging should be perfect, and it might be as well to extend it round the foot. An inflamed bunion ehould be poulticed, and a larger shoe worn. lodine, twelve grains, lard or spermaceti ointment, half an ounce, makes.a capital ointment for bunions. It should be rubbed on gently twice or thrice a day. Enlarged joints should be rubbed thrice a day with common salad oil, care being taken at the time not to strain or overtax the feet by too great or too frequent exercise. Slippers, and loose ones, should invariably be worn. Of shoes we may say the -same thing ; on no account have tight-fitting shoes, slippers or boots. or The other day, several gentlemen were discussing the alarming prevalence of the crimes, desertions, women eloping with other men, &c., when a well known Teuton, who had been listening with great attestion. stepped up and in an excited manner said : "If my vile runs away mit anoder man's vife, I will shake him out of her breeches, if she be my own fader, I will." ea - A. sensible, affectionate, refined, practicat woman, makes a•man's nature all the stronger by making it more ten. der—put new heart into his worthy stri vings sad gives dignity to his prosperity and comfort tobis adversity. Every true life wields . a` still greater power when it feels a living heart drawing it with irresistible force into every posi tion of duty. der Sawdust pills would effectually cure many of the diseases with which mankind are afflicted,cf every individual would make his own sawdust. sr The diiferenee between the fair Indies and ladies' falcis—the one steals nieWe beaSe and the other the contents of t h eir popkets. , gar "r"in . 1 0' 31 a01., it is said makes-ther &wee ligkt tbet ber4edgera, , elaaaee o ge, to bOd -Wilboat cm* after eating a moduate sized piece. VOL. XII.--NO. 30. OHARACTOR OF . A TRUE FRIEND.-COO• cerning the man you call your friend ; tell me, will he , weep with you is the house of , distresa? Will he faithfully reprove you to your face for actions which, others are ridiculing and censur ing behind your back 7—Will he dare to stand forth in your defence when detrac tion is secretly aiming its deadly weapon 'at your reputation 7- Will he acknowl edge you with the same friendly atten tion, in the company of your superiors in rank and fortune, as when the claims of pride do not interfere with those of friendship ? If misfortune and loesea should oblige you to retire into a walk of life in which you cannot appear with the same liberality as formerly, will he . still think himself happy in your society, and, instead of withdrawing himself from an unprofitable connection, take pleasure in professing himself your friend and cheerfully assist you to support the burden of your afflictions? When sick ness shall call you to retire from the gay and busy scenes of the world, will he follow you into your gloomy retreat, lis ten with attention to your " tale of symptotes," and administer the balm of consolation to your fainting spirits I And lastly, when death shall burst asun der every earthly tie, will he shed a tear upon your grave, and lodge the dear re membraece of your mutual friendship in his heart? ihr Mrs. Partington has a host of im itators among the scribblers of the press, but one evidence of worth is the worth, 't►f being copied : "Now, girls," said Mrs. Partington, the other day, to her niece, "you must get husbands as soon as possible or they'll be murdered." "Why so, aunt IY" "Why I see by the papers that we've got almost fifteen thousand post offices, and nearly all on 'em dispatches a mail every day. The Lord have mercy on us poor widows," and the lady stepped quietly to the looking-glass to put on her new cap. Or*' Where Ignorance is bliss, 'its folly to be WiOb." John was thought to be very stupid. He was sent to a mill one day, and the miller said ; "John, some people say you are a fool 1 Now, tell ins what you do know, and what yon don't know." "Well," replied John, " I know mil lers' hogs are fat 1" "Yes, that's well, John 1 Now, what don't you know r -- " I don't know whose corn fats 'em 1" iir A physician, who is a truly pious man, was speaking in a prayer meeting lately of the duty of imposing the idea of salvation upon those near death, and of a physician's opportunities in this way, and made use of the following las. page : " For my own part, 1 am never called to see a patient without feeling dedighted to learn that be is prepared to die." or To be a woman of fashion is one of the easiest things in the world. A late writer thus describes it: "'Buy everything you don't want, and pay for nothirig you get ; smile on all mankind but your husband ; be happy everywhere but at home ; neglect your children and nurse lapdogs ; go to church everytime you get a new dress." eir A fashionable young lady, in at• tempting recently to carry a large coil of horse and other hair on the back of her bead, lost bar balance, on Pennsyl. vania Avenue, Washington, and fell backwards, but was saved from breaking her pretty neck by the gallantry of a nice young man, who caught her in his arms. eir The truest Christian politeness is cheerfulness. It is graceful, and sits well on old as well as young. It is the best of all company, and adorns the wearer of it more than rubies and dia monds set in gold. It costs nothing, and yet is valuable. Eir Genuine neighborly love knows no distinction of persons. It is like the sun, which does not ask on what it shall shine, or what it shall warm ; but shines and warms by the very law of its being. So there is nothing hidden from its light and heat. ' Mr Anu $ who retiree from baldness and lives on the interest of his money, may be said to be resting on his °icier 3. B Lady Montagne maid : " My heath is;like- old-lace. I patch it in one place and it breaks out in another." ler 'l, Marsala," said "a WI of six, "if a non is a Mistier, is b wombs a /I's. terry" We rattler gusts she Is, tansy: