!Mbii
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eVerY club orthree, one of those splen
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Presidents Johnson and Lincoln,
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AtkireAs,
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:3•6m I
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PLATE :DWARF..
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nod our beat Table ware—Spoons,
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TEW la,lt Y.
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'-j - llcTaning of Watches, Clocks, Specta-
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LANCASTER, ?A.
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megal House," Marietta.-
is Mortgages, Judgments and
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.SSOCIATION.
PHILADELPHIA, PA,
Urinary and Sexual Systems
eliable treatment. Also,_ the
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The Second Wife
They tdd me ho had won before
Another's hedrt than mine,
And laid his gist and deepest love
Upon an earlier slu•ine.
They sail my spirit oft must grieve,
. 111. my lot would cast
With ono who held so sacred still
Remembrance or the past.
I heeded not ; my bark was launched
With his own lifels swift tide,
And earth holds nat a happier heart
Than cnia . e—a second bride.
r knew that he had laved and lost
what lire inay,aPer give back,
The flowers that bloomed is freshness
once - .
[lace withered in his track
I knew that she—the angel called— .
Looked imt from yon blue heaven,
A. watcher o'er the earth-bound soul
From which her own Was riven.
Together do we Oft recall
This dream of other years,
Nor do .1 love him less to know,
.1.10 once had eause for tears.
Moro blest am I that it bath been
My love's appointed task
To wake anew the 'charms of home,'
Io which his semi may bet..
DIFFICULTIES OF LAWYELIS.-A testy
lawyer in court found himself bothered
with a knotty witness who wouldn't es
plain, as he desired, the difference be
t Ween the thick ' and 'long ' kinds of
whalebone. • Why, man,' said he, you
don't seem to know the distinction be
tween thick and long.' Ya'as 1 dew:'
' Explain-tt, • Wa'al yon'r thick
headed, but you ain't long-headed, no
how said be. Another was non plea
sed in the following conversation : Law
yer.. Did the defendant knock .the wit
ness down with malice prepense? Wit
ness. No, sir ; he knocked him down
with a flat-iron. L.—You misunder
stood me, my friend ; I want to know
whether he attacked him with any- evil
-intent. W.—Oh ! no, eir ; it was out
side the tent. L.—No, no, I wish von
to tell me whether the attack was at all
a preconcerted affair ? W.—No, sir ; it
was not a free concert affair, it was in a
circus
A maiden lady, not remarkable
for either beauty, youth or good temper,
came for advice to Mr. Arnold - as to how
she should get rid of a troublesome suit
or. "0, Mary, marry hini l" was the ad.
vice. " Nay, I would see him hanged
first. h " No, madam, marry him, as
said to you, and I assure you it will not
be long before he hangs himself."
ilEr The! natives or- Bonlbay; - India,
a're greatly astonished at the lighting of
the streets with gas. The : lanTlighter
is followed by a large crowd every even
ing. They will sit for hours and watch.
the Haines, feel if the posts get :hot,
wonder .why. it don't., and thus . they Sit
and argue the ins and outs of the :clues' ,
Lion until-they get tired and go hoine.
ea- Tom Moore Said to Peel, on lools,
ing at the picture of an Trish orator,
" you can see the very quiver-of his lips."
"Yes," said Peel, " and t,. e arrow. coin
. ing out of it." Moore was tolling this
to one of his nountryinen, who said, "
meant arrah corning out Of '
fill ; Lney'Stone says: "The cradle is
iv woman's ballot box." Then *eve
howl/ soma nolwwful voting ‘ehere, two
ballots were deptisiteq-dt'a tini
. .
fir W bit iThat which 'ocCii - rs 7 Otic.e
in a minute, twice in a momefit t .una not
once in a blinclrid years? The letter
Tr ajukpeOcut Veroplimia *mat for t ffioint
MARIETTA, SATURDAY MORNING, FEBRUARY 3, 1866.
Captain Jack Ballast's Story
My story?. *Well, I don't-see why I
shouldn't scratch- • it down. There's
nothin' to he ashamed of in it, 'so far as
1 knoW, NO though you reelax story
writers mayn't call it, "romantic!' I think
the wind sets that way myself; and
there's a bit of love in it, too, though
yoe'd never think I was a subject for a
love story to look at me. I'm old
enough, dy'e see, to feel safe about the
draft, and brown enough to be a Hotten
tot ; and as . for flesh—well, no matter ;
some of you slim young dandies will be
as stout as I lie if you live as long.
Besides, that fracas at Gibraltar didn't
improve my looks. I'll tell you_ about
that before the story is over, .I reckon ;
at presentl'd better heave ahead,
Fat as I am and old as I am, there
was a time when I was as slender a
young fellow as ever shipped afore the
mast agin his parents' leave. ' They,
Lord bless 'em ! wanted to make a coon=
ter juniper of•merand I triad measuring
rags about a year. Then I couldn't
stand it any longer, and jumped the old
counter for good, and cut and - went' td
sea. had a hank-aria' for it a good
while, and the only thing I ever -regret;
ted was the' way my poor mother took it
to heart. Wait a bit. Honor bright,
there was one thing
That was Jeuuy . Blush, old Blush's
only daughter, and the prettiest girl I
over cast eyes on. tier skin was just,
as soft and fair as any baby's. As for
her hair, I've got a bit in my old desk
upstairs; and though 'it's crossed the
ocean about a dozen times, it's so bright
now, you'd take it for a gold chain coiled
down under Ikb bit of blue ribbon it's
tied with.
Old Bush was my captain ashore. 1
mean to say, he wasthe lies,d_o4e_big
dry goods store where they first sent me 1
to tneasui ing rags, and. , Jenny used to
come over every day after ribbons and
calico, and the like, and; Lea-love ye I -
I don't find fault with the womethfolks
looking after such thiags, theughAdon4,
seem a man's place to sell 'etn.. She
looked mighty pretty when she pat 'ern *
on, did. Jenny. Father.and old Brush
were fast friends, and when
. thoy found
outthat I was sweet on Jenny they put
their, heads together and ,resolved to
sanction the watch. I was to be taken
into partnership, d'ye see, and was to
seep into the rag business when the old
man stePped out. " Dry Goods, Whole
sale and Retail," was the .sign, but I
aiways called 'em rags.
Well, Jenuy and I were fond of each
other, and knew it already ; so, the did
folks'becng agreeable,, we- saw ar , good
-deal of each other; Sundii.fs' and even
ings, to say nothing of the •errands she
made to the store. And I 'used to wish
I could make up my mind to it and stay
ashore ; but I couldn't, not if I'd died
for it. I heard the Wave - a
-beating about
my bed in thy dreams. I bated the
cloth yard and the scissors so they made
me ill. And one night I told Jenny so.
She cried a bit ; but by-and-by she own
ed that she didn't hate ma for• it, and'
we talked of the time when I.shotrld be
a captain, and she should make every
voyage with me, and have a cabin like a
parlor to herself.
Then she let me kiss her. P're,ps she
kissed rue back ; and I cut off the yel.
low curl .1 told you of ..with, a pair, Of scis
sors—the only pleasant job. 1. ever -did
with the confounded things in 'ell My
life.
That night I ran a*ay, and - though
blubbered like a baby when I passed
mother's door, you-couldn't have coaxed
me back again. Whata man wenta to
be he Will be; and th'ere are men meant
from their cradles for the • water es ear
tin as the fish are.
I got aletter from. old mammy-that
cut me up, I. don't deny; bat I knew
she'd come round, and I didn't guess
the, worsthovv should When- it
first came fo me that a matt that sold ,
rags was better than a sailor it,lteo_k,tnyt
breath away. 'Dais was when 1 . first
went home, d'ye see! Marnialit, she,
scolded and cried, and kisSed tat
Martha and Melinda, and hrother.
Charl'eS AtigtistUs . pii.ched jolo the . fero z
cions. Says' they:•" You've disgraced
your family—we have been respectable
and ginteel folks all our liyesi, and now
we're to have a common sailor for a
;brother:"..caught' it—a reg'lar gale;
'and father put in.his oar regarding.. dis
obedience., When. that'caaie I 'cleared
out and parched over 'to old Blush's.-
Nobody warat - h - olife - blr.Tfilifig,`Od she ,
; ran to wins. W
ell,. wis
~w ere bill
ing and cooing, as swectitearts mostly
'do, I recion', Vilien old Minh came home
to tea. I never' heard - a, gale of MIA
'What do you want here, sir ?" says
Says I " Don't you recollect me, Mr.
Blush ? I'm Jack Ballast."' .
Says he "I recollect you well enotkib,
and how dire ..you shoW your face hire ?"
Says I " I came here to see- my Jen-
8y. ,,
"You'r Jenny 2" says he. "My gbod
fellow, Miss Jenny Blush is no match
for a common sailor before the mast;
and -whatever there may have been be
tween you when you were entitled to'my
_respect is all over now. You have your
phoice'of walking quietly out (ourself or
of being kicked, cert. '
Any one but Jenny's father would
have been floored for that. I, just look-
Od down and saw my, fists shut up of
themselves, and. tried to.keey,'em so.
Says I, coot as I,uonld, donl moan
to be'before the mast all my life, sir. I
expect to be a captain some day."
"And," says old Blush, " a man with
no advantages, brought up to the sea,
might boast o' that ; but you might have
been a:partner in our 'firm, sir. You
might have been'a gentleman, and had
as good a business in the dry-gbdds line
as any man alive. Azid you. have chos
en to be a roving rascal. And I'd see
my daughter in her grave before I'd give
her to you. Sam, show this person out."
That was the nigger just come aboard
the parlor with the coal hod. And when
he said that my. fists were beyond my
control, and the last I saw of old Blush
he was on his back on the hearth-rug.
Then says I to
. the'darkey, "Touch tne
if you pant to, you rascal." and started
out. rs ,
I saw Jenny on the.sly next day and
tried to get her to ""run away ; but - the
girl had a ivill of her own and knowed
her duty.-
Says slier I can - *obey my father,
Jack. IJoye you . dearly, and I.ll:neyer
marry noy,otte else.; but
over between us.. Idon.t tkiplizpa would
have relented even : , if , you- hada V been
so, violent; bet now he never will.
You've-done it yourself, Jack, she said,
turnibg white and looking away
from me, "You like the -sea best, and
you ye got it instead of me "
hoe were . the la'st words' she said
and I was going away when I beard her
give a little cry, and turning -saw .her
arms streteked Out tbWards me; theb I
went back and folded •her to my bosom,
and kissed her a hundred times: And
Pnr afraid:Dowse& her: hard 'old father
from the .Ibottoth. of my - soca, though
'twitsat loud; formniud ye; a 'woman is - a
womdp,. and :w.o.rdt good - :etiongh for
, other men's ears:ain't to be spoken* be:
fore her. The sight cif,Jenny, as ..T., left
1.
her, with her yellow hair blown back an
der the, bare tree branches,
.all bright
with icicles, haunted me for many a long.
-day; and thoughj loved the sea, _there
wen times when, fooking over the ride r
I used; tofanCy a 'voice deepdown in the
waves whispering her words over again
"You've done it yourself, Jack, you
. .-
liked the sea better than me, and you've
got it."
It doesn't take long for the 'years to
- . •
go by:either on land 'or ocean. `They .
, • •
went With me ill with ether folks. I
got on well enough. Before I knew- it
I MO see,orkl . mate,.then first m then
captedo. -I Suppose 1 should-have
ed the sea until they*bu'ridMe'in 'it if
it hadn't been for my first. mate,. John
Malin. I loved that fellow as I might
It brother; if I'd -had a better- one than
Charles Augustus.::At Gibraltar- Ham.
-lin got into .a .r.o.w with - some, liingliSh
soldiers. . They'd alit been drinkfag to
gether.;..of course Ltook his part. They
had firq-arms about them, and used them' ,
'on each other: I didn't save ..Hamlin
for, they shot .him dead ; but I got -a
couple.ef bullets, n toe, and .Lwas pick
ed up just , as. near puyy Jones' - locker as
any man eyormas.who didra go into it.
I got well actaln but was on the' ,invalid
list ; .and.as.rd laid up ,a handful of mon-,
,
ey and i was past 40, I mad,a,ap ray.inlnd
to 'slay at home and take care -of John
Hamfin's orphan children. He had, wo,
of theta, both girls.- I.settled down in
- No* York and fetched theul,home, poor
half starved creatures, , -for the woman
they boarded with was:given to drink,.
and' 'kept theta on 'bread and treadle i
ind r as they - Cold - me I must, I put theni
le' black froCks--they'd have felt just as
badln red—and settled down to be eikm - -'
fortablti. 'Soon - I looked out for a dap. :
lain to-pasi Sunday as - it ought to .bel
and the Rev. Ebert ' Tonker'il' Church'
being'hartlY,l - shiPlied him 'along' with
thetilkii,' 'and as I. aliiiin"...dri iriY f j a t : : i;
4 e " ..
rieler'priliendlieboV t,' go the. plate
;ben V ii 6
Vie tted 'A.I3 a 14. ii - Vr = 6)] rife fv:
Rev. Eben 'fooker was a addable man.
--tie uged 1..9 4TO- -Ts and talk to
t)
me about my soul ; and though I can't
shy but what I dropped asleep some
times, he knowed his duty when he did
it.
_A ,captain's duty is one thing, and a
chaplain's is another.
One day he spoke about poor Ham
tin's gals. Says be, "You send them to
school, I hope." Says I, "I haven't
done it yet—gals are better without
learning, if they can read their Biblei
and cipher out their butcher bills."
ISut`he kept'on, and pretty soon Llet
him examine 'em, Lord love ye, they
hardly knew their letters. The school
in' as well as the board lad gone for gin.
The poor heathen are scarcely more
benighted," said our chaplain. He in
sists On my saying pastor, but t'other
sounds the best. ;
"We 'must' find an instructress for
them, captain."
"Surely," said wanted to do the
best by - poor Tom'S Children that I could
surely; just mention a schoolmarm,
chaplain."
Said he, " my - own are tinder the care
of the person who playa the .organ—a
highly estimable lady in reduced circum
stances._ Her school is close by. No.
-- Broome street."..'
So we wrote tbe name and address on
a card, and I promised to, take the gals
there.
Monday mo rning we . set shil. . I bought
'em bookti and satehhls and
;slates, and by nine o'clock we were-at
'the door. q'hen I looked for -- the card,
and, behold ye, I'd lost it! 136'Wever, I
'was in port, and• could :the. lidy as
school-martn."
Betsy was piping her eye, - and P;eg
was bawling that she wanted to go home.
But, says No, no, gals, I don't want
'you to grow ,up benighted as the heath.
ras >sv thhat tie,eliaplaia..cailile
noiv."
So I lugged 'em in end made.my rev
erence. •
." Duty, ma'am,',' says ; "-here's two
galls asneeds instruction. Rev.' Ebert
Tookeprecominended , ye to-give it to rem,
and whatever extra it for playing the
organ:let 'em lira sit for it's you that
works it in the top of the loft 'o Sunday§
—you know how to do it. Gappen Jack
Ballast at jour service. Send your bills
to him, and he'll foot 'em." •
I ain't bold , with women. a bit
bashful; afore : strange.,'uns even yet.
And I haAdt looked at her. But when
I spoke out my name she gave a4ittle
scream and started back. Of course I
couldn't help looking at-her then, and
she wassittingilOwn with ter handker
chief-before her face: ,
Says' "Beg p'ard'on,' are You' ill,'
mum?" • . =
Says she, still not loohing "Did
you say your name was Captain Jack
Ballast ?" -" ""
"Jack Ballast, at your service," said' I.
- Says sbe, "Oh, Jack I don't you'hnoW -
me ?"
Sayer, '" Look up and make, Sere."
—And she lifted up ,her face and_l saw
—well, if it wasn't the pink-cheeked-girl
I knew. It wasn't a girl at all, but in a
minute it was Jenny Blush again—a
great deal Satire than - I was young Jack
Ballast.
"Jenny,' says I,*"611", Jenriy, is it re
ally -you ?"
Aud theh the cafoi - dame into her
cheeks, and her eyes glittered, and she
whispeted, "oh, not' before the school,
Jack ;' for I had caught her to my
heart and kissed her..
We had not much-time to .palaver
then,-but came for• her again in the
'evening and took her for a walk. And
she told me-how the-rag-store - had been
shipwrecked, and old , Blush dropped
dead of apoplexy 'when he kndw of it.
And how my brother - Charles-Augustus
had offered her his hand, but she had
said no,•andPreferred,te,earu n hgr
living to. marrying one aheilid a mot : love
while there was one living, whom he did;
'And now it was fifteen years ago:—fifteen
weary years. . -
Then says I, "Jenny, darling, I love
you better than ever, now-rie found
you again. When yen told my brother
there was some one living you loved did
you
"es, Jack," said shc. •
Says I "Now youiip seen. Me-4a.
weather beaten scarred old sailor—do
.•
yuti think the.same.Mr.: -
Saba she; 4 "lbalw ayti Esdi 11, Jack?'
'"Oome• on than," Says -1. Arid' nut;
another.warduattl we•camei.toqiie Efev
',ben 'tookees. Thereft:ralig: the "lie'
`Why, nay %Au% oplight
Mi'liere, Jack
; Says* I; "To make the ~clmplain mar
ry us, love.' ,
Says she, " It's too sudden. 3 can't..
.w, haM ~~~~~tb:.~~
VOL. XII.-NO. 26.
•' No matter for people," says I
And in we walked. And for all she
told me that no woman was ever married
before in a delaine dress and straw bon
net, the chaplain didn't find it any ob
stacle, but spliced us. And so after
nineteen years I got my Jenny for my
own.
I don't think she's sorry for it, and I
know I ain't ; and as for poor Tom's
children, she's a mother to 'em. And
whether there's any romance in my story
or not, it's a happy one for me in the
ending, as sure as my nam, is Jack
Ballast.
Iscatnurxry P ERSONIFIED.—There is
living on Martha's Vineyard an old man ,
who has never been off the island, and
the extent of his knowledge is bounded
by the confines of his home. He has
been told of a war between the North
and South, but as he has never heard the
din of battle, nor seen any soldiers, he
considered it a hoax. He is utterly un
able to read, and is ignorant .to the last
degree. An excellent story is told of
his 'first and only day at school. He
was quite a lad when a lady came to the
district where his father resided, to
teach school. He was sent, and as the
teacher was classifying the school he
was called up in turn and interrogated
RS to his former studies.
Of course he had to say that he bad
never been to school, and knew none of
his letters. The schoolmistress gave
him a seat on one side until she had fin
idled the preliminary.examination of the
rest of the scholars. She then called
him to her and drew on the black-board
the letter A, told him what it was and
wished him to remember how it looked.
He looked at it a moment and then in
quired ( be stuttered )
" Et•h-how do you know it's A ?"
The teacher replied that when she
was a girl, she had been to school to an
old gentleman who told her so.
The boy eyed the .A fora moment and
then asked, " H•h how did he know ?".
This was almost .a stunner, but the
teacher suddenly recollected that he had
told her that when a boy he had been to
a school to a lady, who taught him that
it was A.
The boy eyed the letter a little long
er, when he burst out with " H•h-how
did• he.know but she 1-1-lied-?"
Theleacher coOld not get over this
obstacle, and the poor .boy was sent
home as incorrigible.
A QUAKER WOMAN'S SERMON My
den+ friend - ET, there are three things I
•
vcry mach wonder at. The first is, that
children should be so foolish as to throw
up stones, clubs and Vrickbats into fruit
trees, to knock down fruit; if they Would
let it alone ft would fall itself. The
second is, that men should be so foolish,
up:a frayen SO wicked, as to go to war, and
kill each other ; if let alone they would
die themselves. And the third and last
thing 1 wonder at is, that young men
should be so 1.111Wi60,83 to go. after the
young women ; if they would stay at
home, the young women would -come af
ter- em."
r firA shreardlereacher, after au elo
quent 'charity sermon, said to his hear
ers : lam afraid, from the sympathy
displayed in your countenances, that
some of you may give too much. I cau
tion you, therefore, that you should be
just before you are generous; and wish
you to understand that I desire nu one
who cannot pay his debts to put any
thing in the p'ate." The collection was
a rare one. •
Cr To be a woman of fashion is one
of the easiest things in the world. A
late writer - thus describea it : " Buy ev-
erythiog you don't want, and pay for
.nothing you get; smile on all mankind
but your husband,; be happy everywhere
but at home ; neglect your children and
nurse lap-dogs ; go to church everytime
you get a new dress."
Cr The truest_Qhristion politeness is
cheerfulness. It is graceful, and sits
well - on old as well as young. It is the
best of all company, and adorns the
wearer of it more than rubies and diem.
onds-set in gold. It costs nothing, and
yet is valuable.-
Er Genuine neighborly. love knows
no distinction of persons. it is like the
ono, which does not ask on what ikshall
shine, or what it-shall warm ; Amt-shines
and warms by the very law or its own
being. So there it; nothing hidden from
its light and - hed '
Gar A sinewd-4ittle fellow who had
just beitin to readiliatin, astonished the
111'81TEet: by the f.3ll;witig translations :
"Vir, a wan ; gin, a trap— 'Virgin, man-