BY FRED'K L. BAKER.
00 111040 & eoiutr)bia %Dna!
(MAVIS of this road run by Reading Ral
i
Rood tune, which is ten mittuteslaster
Von that of Pennaylvania Railroad.
TEAMS OR THIS ROAD RUN Al FOLLOWS:
LEAVING COLUMBIA AT
:00 A. M.—Mail Passenger train fo
Reading and intermediate stations
connecting at Lank Leville, daily, except Mon
zay, with Erie Express of P. R. R. reaching
Philadelphia at 10:30 in the morning ; leaving
Manheim at 7:41 ; Litiz at 7:54 ; Ephrata at
8 : 23; Reinholdaville at 8:50; Sink ing Springs
09:1 6 ; and arriving at Rt . ading at 8:36 a.
m.
At Reading connection is made with Fast Es
press train of East Pennsylvania Rail Road,
reaching New-York at 2:30 P. M. with train
of Philadelphia and Reading Railroad, reach
ing. Philadelphia at 12:45 p. m., and also with
trains for Pottsville, the Lebanon Valley and
llarrisburg ,
P. M.—PASSENGER "T RAI N
2:10 for Reading' sad intermediateda
tione, connecting at Landisville at 2:50 P. M.
with Express trains of Penn's. R. R., both
East and West, leaving Manheim at 3:26; Litiz
3:41; Ephrata at 4:10; Reinholdsville 4:37 ;
Sinking Springs 5:03 and arriving at Reading
st da P. RI. At Reading do:inflection is made
with trains for Pottsville and Lebanon Valley.
LEAVE READING AT
6:10 (or Co lV l i a A a g n S T G t
e E r me e d a T t e I t
AN
tions, leaving
Sinking Springs at 6 26 ; Rein
hoidsrille at 6 b 4, Ephrata.at
7 .54, Itlanheim at 8 08, making connection at
Landisville with train of Penn'a ,Railroad,
rusting Lancaster at 8:33 A M. and Phila
delphia at 12:30; arriving at Columbia at 9
o'clock, A. M., there connecting the Ferry for
Wrightsville and Northern Central Railroad,
at 11:42 A. M.with train of Penn'a. Railrofid
(or the West.
P . TzT ion fo s r
6.15 Columbia tMaaniPass e nge r
intermediate
with passengers leaving New- York at 12 M.,
and Philadelphia at 3:30 P. M., leaving Sink
ing Springs at 6:31 ; Remholdsville 6i.b6 ; Eph
rata 7:20; Wiz 7:4S ; Manheim 8:03; connec
ting at Landisville with un Express- train of
the P. It. It. for Lancaster and Philadelphia,
reaching Philadelphia at 11:30 p. In. and ar
riving at Columbia at B:SJ P. M.
la-The Pleasure Travel to Ephrata and
Linz Springs from New-York, Philadelphia,
Baltimore and other points, is by this-schedule
accommodated several times per day with Ex
press trains connecting in all directions.
la - Through tickets to New-York, Phila
delphia and Lancaster sold , at principal sta
ins. Iraight carried with utmost prosnt
en and dispatch, at the lowest rates.
Further information with regard to Freight
or ptimenge, may be obtained from the agentt
of the Company.
INF:NOES COHEN, Superintendent.
E.F. KEEVER, General Freight and Tian
Agent.
TO HOUSE-CLEANERS.
— o —
LL BRUSHES,
A new article in this market, and far superior
to any other in use. A few reasons why :
First.—They are free from twine, which is
affected by the lime, and liable to rut, caus
ing the falling out of the bristles.
Second.—The bristles are inserted in the
wood, or body of the brush, when green, which
when dry, causes them to be held firmly in
their place ; any subsequent soaking or shrink
age fails to affect them. •
Third,—They are made of Bristle& exclusive.
ly; many kinds being composed, in part, of
whalebone,
Fourth.—They coot= more bristles for the
she, and are as cheap as the ordinary kind.
Sold exclusively by JOHN SPANGLER,
AT HIS HARDWARE STORE.
CHEAP READY-MADE ('LOTEIINGI!
Having just returned from the city with
fi nicely selected lot of litedy-made Clothing,
Which the undersigned in prepared to furnish at
reduced prices; having laid in a general assort
ment of men and boys' clothing, which he is
hiens iced to sell Low, roe CASH. His stock
consists of (iv Ea 7 Cas k re, Duass, FR ocx ANZ
SACK COATS, Pa.atra, _Veers, PEAJA.CIMTB,
lI SCROBOUTS, (14114,9 V ESKA UM?, CRAVATS,
I hAWERS, SHIRT'S, UOISESIY, UHDCILSHIHTS,
GLOVES, SUSPZESDEINS; &c. Everything in the
Furnishing Goop line. Call and examine bo
ors purchasing elsewhere.' Everything sold at
Nicellg suit the 'times. JOHN BELL.
Urger of Elboio Lane and .Market St
next door to Cassel's Store.
18 65. I
.PHILADELPHIA 1865.
Paper Hangings.
Ull. DWELL & BOtILICE,
MANUFACTURERS OF
PAPER HANGINGS
AND WINDOW SHADES,
North East Corner .raurtA and Market streets,
PHILADELPHIA.
N. 13 .—Always in store, a Large stock of
LINEN AND. OIL SIIADES.
August 24,1865.-3 ml
HENRY HARP.ER,,
,* MO ARCH STREET, • 4):
PHILADELPHIA.
Watches,
Fine Jtutelry,
Said 611 W'le a r g )
AND 811P111101). tiILVEA-P&A,Tip lra".
Oct.
Pint National Bank of `garietta
- -
•
S RANKING ASSOCIATION
RATING CORPLETED ITS ORGANIZATION
is now prepared to transact ell kinds*
BANKING BITSINESks:
The Board of Directors meet weekly, on
W ,..... edn e„adlY for discount:nod other business.
uank /four*: PTORS 9A.11t0 3 v. sr.
JOHN HOLLINGER, PRESIDENT.
AIIOS BOWMAN, Cashier.
f You want
A n r it - rste Black or Fancy Silk
at or gay ohallie or De Laine
B uPrtlor Black or fancy Woolen, De Lame
A dee or medium Black or Colored Alpaca
Ago o
, d Lavelle, De Beige or Poplin
44 Chintz or ood
A FrenchPacellent, English or Shagmin gCalico
Gingham
Yoe will find it 14
SPANGLER ac ,-
„14TTENTION 1 SPORTSMEN!
, Gun Caps, Elere Gun W
1141t imoreQuit
aPord'a S potting= .and Glazed Duck YON; er
; Shot Pou ches Powder Flab
. 10 1.EIPAINE.EIVS.
111110/CE E G AA'S, ind the
J > etl Qewleg ac 4 Bookie Taboaeo at
Tiljt c'-);lt_Tar.i..t:t-•.::i•alt.
Vexieo ± Nexico I !
$30,000,000 LOAN
OF THE
ge g imit of
.Mttitg.-
Twentmear Coupon Bonds in Sums of $5O,
$lOO, $5OO, and $l,OOO.
INTERESTSEVEN , PER CENT. PAYABLE IN THE
CITY OF NEW YORK.
Principal and hiterest payable' in Gold
$1.0,000,000 to be Old at sixty cents on
the dollar,,
in U. S. Currency, thus yielding an interest of
Twelve per cent., in gold, or seventeen per
cent in currency, at the present rate of pie
inium on gold.
THE FIRST YEAR'S INTEREST
ALREADY PROVIDED.
THE MOST DESIRABLE INVESTMENT EVER
OFFERED.
Immense tracts of mining and agricultural
lands • Sixty per cent. of Port Dues, Imposts,
and Taxes, in the States of Tamaulipas and
an Luis Potosi; and the pl ghted fnith of the
said States and the general Government are
all Pledged for the redemption of these bonds
and payment of interest.
THE SECURITY IS AMPLE.
$3O in U. S. Currency will buy a 7 per cen•.
Gold Bond of $5O. • •
$6O in U. S. Currency will buy a 7 per cent.
Gold Boad of $lOO.
$3OO in ' U.S.: Currency will buy a 7 per cent.
Gold Bond of $5OO. ,
$6OO in U. S. Currency will buy a '7 per cent.
Gold Bond of $l,OOO.
Let every lover of Republican Institutions,
BUY AT LEAST ONE BOND
Circularaforwarded and subscriptions received
by JOHN W. CORLIES 4. CO.,
- Arm J. N. TIFFT.
Financial Agent of the Republic
of Mexico, 57 Broadway, N. Y.
lrr Subscriptions also, received by Ranks &
Bankers generally, throughout the U. S.
GOLD! [1865, 1866, 1867.] SILVER I
1 TO 75,000 i
..$2l $2.1 $2!
Two I
BIANUFAC AGENTS.
OUR NEW MODE
One of our Gold or Silver Watches, or
Silver 'Ma Sets for $2, as below stated.
One of our tea sets or one piece of our Gold or
Silverware is worth a bushel of the cheap dol
lar Jewelry.
We have adopted the following mode of
DISTRIBUTION
Ly sale of 75,000 articles of value
OUR NEW MODE!!
The articles of goods are numbered from 1
up to 75,000 ! 37,500 consisting of Pianos,
Melodeons, Gold and Silver Watches, Sewing
Machines, Tea and Table sets, Solid Silver
Tea and Table Spoons and Forks, etc., etc. ;
and the other 37,500 articles of valuable Jew
elry, Work and Toilet Case's, Photograph Al
bums, Openfaee Silver Watches, and fancy ar
ticles in great variety. 76,000 notices num
bered from 1 to 75,000 are printed and put in
to sealed envelopes and well mixed, and one
of these is taken out and sent to the person
sending to us 25 eta to cover expense of post
age, correspondence, etc., and the article or
goods, corresponding .vith the number on the
notice will be sent to the holder of the same
immediately (if he deithes to purchase the
article) on the receipt of two dollars. For
instance.—lf the number on the notice sent
to you should be 500, and .a Piano. or Diamond
Set or Gold Watch should be numbered 600 it
will be sent to you for $2, and so on for every
article in our list of 75,000 articles.
II After receiving the Article, if it does
not please you, you, can -return it, and your
money shall be refunded.
Twenty-five cents must be sent to pay ex
pense of postage, cortespondence, etc., on one
notice.
Remember, that whatever article corres
ponds with the number on your notice, you
can have it by paying Two Dollhrs far it.
whether it be worth $lOO or, $BOO. And it is
for our interest to deal fairly, and send out
our fine articles, ryi it gives confidence to the
public,' and the-eby increases our sales.
TRY OUR NEW MODE! !
Upon receipt of 25 cents, which. pays for
coneepondence, postage, etc. we senitone no
tice.
Upon receipt. of $1 which pays for corres
pondence postage, etc.,'we send six notices.
Upon receipt of $6, which pays for corres
pondence, postage, etc, we send 40 notices.
and a fine present, 'valued at no less tha $l5,
as a sample of onr goods.
Upon receipt of $lB, which pays forcorres
pondence postage, etc., we will send 150 nos
tires, and`a solid Silver Watch, by return mail.
Agents Wanted. Send for our circular
Agents allowed a large cash commission,
by which they can make $26 weekly.
Address plainly,
REED & BROTHER,
Both 5138, New York City. N. Y.
Salesroom, 34 Liberty - Sr.' f 3m.
DR. J. Z. HOFFER,
DENTIST,
: Or-THE BALTIMORE COLLEGE
%lasi.. OF, DENTAL VIIRGERY,
LATE OF HARRISBURG.
O. VP I .CE:--Frontititseet, nestdoor to R.
Williams , Drug, Score, between Locust
and Walnut streets, Columbia.
I:OA.NIEL G. :EMCEE, •
ATTORNEY .111' LAW,
• LAIWASTER.=PA.
"OFFICE 24 , Nottxwavirm grusul.
Opposite the Court -House, where he , rill at
tend to , the practice of Ids professiOn,ln an na
4 various branches.
, c OWARD 4.SSOCIATION
et.D .4-
.. ....
7 , fRILICLRIIIA, 1"' A,
r Li _
seamen of the Urinary and &lad - Systems.
• .La Ileirbbd`relhible treatment: Altioclhe
Bitrxral.'esmarnest, an: Ealaymf -warning/old':
./itstructien, gelatin sealed enveloßee, free of
charge.. MOrpee, Dfr .T..Situ.Prx Hpsprron,
Howard AliOniadek; NO. g goo& Ninth-tit.,
..hitadel . hie, Pe. [jay. 1,'86-17.
tube r6tut Vtonsiiihnia lournal for tt ontt Cult.
MARIETTA, SATURDAY MORNING, NOVEMBER, 25, 1865.
PUBLISHED WEEKLY .
AT ONE DOLLAR AND A HALF A YEAR,
PAYABLE- IN ADVANCE.
Office in . '" LaNDeLy's Buiumaa,'f second
floor, on Elbow' Lane, between the. Post
Ogle, Corner and Pront.St., Marietta,
Lancaster .Coanty,. Pennsylvania.
ADVERTISING RATES: One squire (10
lines, (fflees)7s cents for - the first insertion and
One Dollar and-a-half for 3 insertions. Pro
fessional and Business car ds, of six lines or less
at ss'per annum. Notices in the reading col
umns, ten cents it-tiste. Marriages and Deaths,
the simple announcement, rREE j but for any
additional lines') ten cents a line.
Illiberal deduction made to Yearly and half
yearly. advertisers.
Havingjust added a," NEWBURY MOUN,.
VAIN JOBBER Prtss," together with a large
assortment of new Job and Card type, Cuts,
Borders, &c., &c., to the Job Office of "THE
MwarEvriAN," which will insure the foe and
speedy execution of all kinds - of JOB & CARD
PRINTING, from the srnalicat Card to the
LARGEST POSTER, at reasonable prices.
MONIALK AND CHURCH SCANDAL
That tall young fellow'a hero to-day
I wonder what's his name ?
Hie eyes 'are fixed upon our pew—
Do look at Sally Dame.
Who is that lady dressed in green ?
It can't be Mrs. Leach ;
There's Mrs. Jones with Deacon Giles I
I wonder if he'll preach.
Lend me your fan, it is so warm,
We both will sit to prayers ; •
Mourning becomes the WidoW Athos--
flow Mary's bonnet flares.
Do look at Nancy Blooper's veill
It's full'a breadth too wide ;
I wonder if Susannah .Ayres -
Appears to-day as a bride
Lord,! what a voice Jana Rice has got;
Oh, how that organ roars!
I'm glad we're left - the singer's seats—
How hard Miss Johnson snores.
What ugly shawls are those in front ?
Did you observe Ann Wild?
Her new straw bonnet's trimmed with
black,
I guess she's lost a child.
I'm half asleep—that Mr. Jolies I
His sermons are so long ;
This,afternoon we'll.stay at home
And practice that new song.
OLEANLINESS.-00M pare the dirtiness
of the water in which you have washed
when it is cold without soap. You will
find the first has hardly removed any
dirt at all, the second a little more, and
the third a great deal more. But hold
your band over a cup of hot water for a
minute or two, and then, by merely rub
bing with the finger, you will bring off
flakes of dirt or dirty skin. After a va
por bath you may peel your whole self
clean in this way. What Imean is that
by simply washing with water you do
not clean the akin. Take a rough towel,
dip one corner in very hot water—if a
little spirit be added to it will be more
effectual—and then rub as if you were
rubbing the towel into your akin with
your fingers. The black flakes which
will come off will convince you that you
were not clean before, however much
soap and water you may have need.
These flakes are what require removing.
And you can really keep yourself
cleaner with a tumbler fall ofhot water
and a rough towel and rubbing, than
with a whole apparatus of bath and soap
and sponge, without rubbing. It is
quite nonsense to say that anybody
need be diity. Patients have been kept
wird:sits on a long voyage, when a beaks
ful of water could not be moved out of
their berths, as if all the appurtenances
of hoine' had been at hand:
Washing, howeve`r, with a large (pan
tiq of water, has quite other- effects
than. those of- mere cleanliness. The
skin absorbs the water, and becomes
softer and more- perspirable. To wash
with soap and'soft water, is, therefore,
mom desirable from other points of view
than that of plei,Eilinpgs.-IVotes on Nur
„ling by Florence; Night ngade..
sr "P a p a;" said a little urchin to
his father the other day- I saw a Orin
ter go down street , just now,"
"Did you ConneY. How didlon know
that =the person. was a printer ?"
"Cause I do, papa."
•"Bat he might have been a carpenter,
blacksmith or shoemaker." ,
"Oh r no, papa, he was a= printer. for
he • Wad' gnawing a=tone, he had no
stockings on, the crown was out of his
..Wat; andlis'coat wai - allLtorni. I'm cer
tain -he was a printer."
!Melaka ta:sufipose a mac
to beialnu r airbiliatuse he Wears a brick
iB bit bet
Communicated for The3fariettian.
In Memoriam.
'" Friend after friend departs.
Who bath' not lost. a *lend t "
Gentle, lovely Annie Marks. 'Who
did 'not love her? To whoin that knew
her was she not dear.? - What would
Locust Seminary have been without her:?
When she was absent the circle was not
complete. 'We needed . her sparkling
black eyes; her cheerful, smiling face,
her merry , laugh,: her• gayety and fun.
Who could read, as she could, the beau
tiful passages in our reading lessons I
Who could edit so'well the Crystal Gem.
To her all loVed to listen. When the
Gem was to be read in public, who but
Annie 011'i:tad be the'Editiese l-
On that last pleasant evening, when
parents and friends assembled to cele
brate with us the close of our winter's
work, and to spend 'with us a happy hour
ere we should separate;' Annie was with
us, the chosen of her mates to read the
last farewell. It was hbr last exercise
in Locust Hall. Do you remember,
scholars, how she spoke of the western
home to which she expected soon to go.
and how she asked you to think some
times of her as she would think- of you!
-Joyful and buoyant with 'hope she
rooked forward to that strange land,
which her 3 outhful imagination 'bad pic
tured all beautiful and bright. It anis
on a sunny. Saturday morning that she
bid adieu to her childhood's home on the
banks of the noble Susquehanna' for
another by thetide of the ." lordly Mis
sissippi," carrying with her prayers and
kind wishes from many
, hearts of those
that loved her. '
Often since did we think of her and
wish for tidings of the absent one. Only
a day or two ago, tidings came ; but ab,
they were, sad, and mournful. "Dear
Annie is no more. In her western home
on the 10th of October, she died."
How many hearts were. made sad ;
how many eyes were filled with tears at
those tidings ! Annie Marks is dead I
She whom_ we loved so fondly ; the
gentle, cheerful, happy Annie, is no
longer among the circle of loved ones
upon earth. Like, a flower nipped by
the early frost she has faded, drooped,
and died. While the leaves of early au
tumn were falling silently to the ground,
she too passed away into the silent
grave. '
..Oh, it is hard to realize that this can
be. Truly, "it seems like a dream,
when we think hon , full of , life and , joy
Annie was when she left us so short a
time since." As I look at her picture
now, I can fancy her only as she need
to appear among us, her black eyes
sparkling, and her voice ringing ont in
merry, laughter, one of the gayest of the
gay.. But ah, she has gone and we shall
see her here no more. She went to the
west to find a home but instead she
found a grave, the common home of all.
Yet, dear Annie we will not forget
thee. Long as we remember' Locuet
Hall, the Crystal Gem, and school days,
will we remember thee, for thou art- in
separably linked with them all. No,no,
we never can forget thee. Though we
cannot visit, thy grave in the far distant
west, in our hearts will we plant flowers
to thy memory and will often think of
thee. Farewell, dearly loved pupil,
schoolmate, friend, sweet be . thy` sleep
beneath lake_ western _tiod. _FRANK.
ARTIFICIALWANTp.—BaIwersays that
poverty is only an idea, ie nine cases
out of ten. Some men with ten thous
and dollars a year suffer more for want,
of means than others with three hund
red. The reason is the richer man =has
artificial wants. His income is ten
thousand, and he suffers enough from
being dunned - Air unpaid debts to kill a
sensitive man. .A man who earns a dol
lar a day, and doeeTnot run in:deOt is
the,happier of two. Very few people
who, have never been rich,, will believe
this„ bat it id as true as God's woyd.
There are thensands and thousands with
princely incomes who never know a mo
ment's peace because :they live Above
their means. There is really more lap
plum in the ,world wing the working,
people than itmooir. those who are called
rich.
is saidAthata small quantity of
sassafras bark mixed .wip dried fruit
will keep, it free i frop Ar . orms for years.
The remedy is easily obtained in many
legalities, and ht-well worth -an experi-
Meet; as it will injure tlie - fruit in
'any manner, if it ifois not . the
nuisance
lEll
sr Do not live in hope with your
orms'folded. - - •FortuinEsmiles*nt !those
who roll up their sleeves and — Pet
shoulders to the wheel.
Philosophy of aL'oting.
The young eat for three reasons,: Ist,.
To grow ; 2d. to keep warm ; 3d. to
repair waste. Adults eat for the list
two purposes ; hence all food contains
one of two elements, and some "kinds
both, called , nitrom and carbon." The
nitrogen makes flesh, sometimes called
Muscle, and is the same as lean meat.
Carbon makes the fat, and is that which
keeps us_warm. Sugar, starch,_ arrow
root, oil, butter, suet, and lard-, have no
nitrogen ; ih - ere is nothing in them 'to
make flesh , out of ; all the nutriment
they afford is carbon, the material for
warmth. Infants and young childyen
would soon die, would get so 'chilly as
to freeze, as it were, unless they had
something sweet in their food ; hence
nature has implanted in them an unap
peasable taste for sweet things. The
thing the new horn infant needs first
and always is warmth, Butter, oils, and
starches abound also,-in the heatlrod,n
-cing elements, but they require , strong
powers of digestion, are applicable ,to
grown up persons and to the old ; hence
as we grow, old we like fat , meate, pile
and butter more.
::It: is in obedience, to these laws that
Almighty beneficence has imparted a
relish for oils andjat meats ,in winter,
because extra heat is needed. Green
landers, whose-country is always cover
ed with ice -and snow, consider:butter
and lard and tallow candles and the
rankest oils the greatest luxuries con
ceivable. But rice, on which many of
the inhabitants of warm countries chief
ly live, is said to contain scarce one
per cent. of - the fat or heat producing
element; while oils have ninety-six , per
cent. of it.
All know how buckwheat cake(' are
relished in winter ; but when spring
comes on; we begin to lose our appetite
for them. The cakee theMselves con
taM fifty-four per cent. bf the fat or heat
producing element, add 'their' are- made
more palatable by spreading butter on
them, and adding to this molasses, each
being almost entirely ( ninety-six per
cent.) heat producing.
But out door workers eat' th'iiat - and
bread the year round. and never- weary
of it, because twenty-two per cent. , of
them are flesh forming, give that mach
power and strength to work.—Hall's
Journal of Health.
LOGIC ; OR. Tae WAGER WON,—Two
gentlemen, who4ied been born „on the
same day, were once. celebrating, the
event by a dinner to their mutual friends.
After the cloth was removed, and the
social glass had circulated pretty brisk
ly, one of the hosts Said to the other :
" What'll you lay, Johnson, that I Ido
not prove-myself considerably.older than
you ?" "Why, that's downright non
sense," returned the other, "and as 1
am sure of-winning,-I'll bet-you .a rump
and a dozen yoneannot do it." "Done 1"
"Done l" "Well, then," said the first
speaker, "whaVis , , your age to day ?"
" Forty,", said J4nson. "Why, then,"
cried the other tritimphautly, "as we
were both born on the same day, 'I must
Of course be forty too A hearty Inugh
. „
followed this lolieal `deduction, and' it
was allowed on all hands that the wager
• ,
was fairly : won, although.at •the,expense
of adding two years - to the age ,of the
di4r *se FiTeetip the Eaglish &Ore' se
was one evening dressing for a part ,
when a boy attached to the theatre
knocked ; at the door. " Please, Miss,
the're's it the back who says
she wants two - orders to •see the play."
"What is her; nem@ ? Go and ask . her.
I proMised no orders." " I did aek her
name, but she s aid ft,was,ne use telling
it„becanse yolk didn't know her." "Net
know her, and she expects orders! Has
the woman her faculties about her?"
I tiliek.o4q,hitve,*e'eut, for:I see her
have a handle tied up in a pocket hand
:kerchief under-her arm." '
sir The : " peven Wise 'Women of
Persia," who by royal edict ,prepared
a code of bre governing domestic mat
ters in that realM r lay,it down as a feet
that, "rhere are three tihds of min.:: 1.
A . proper man ; 2. - Half • a Man ; 3.' A
bripul hupla. A proper man always
gives his wife "whatevei'she Wants; your
half man is a poor, sniveling wretch who
given jwin Wife but little ; and your, hn
-01 kulliaj.Bl:.;%',.soBl4.lll:lle. -jealons.'„Otea.
Ore who gives his wife nothing, but
illtiV B 2 l ex - d t t ha ': 9 P ll 3‘ 9r
tha If she slays away alt 'day,
he in swot° ask her.where,shulas teen."
MEI
The Japan's.) say, " The oitgne
of women is 'her sword, and she never
lets It grow rusty for- want closing.
VOL. XII.-NO. 16.
Rather Rough Honeymoon
On last Friday morning an athletic
young farmer, in the town of Waynes
burg, took a fair girl " all bathed in
blushes," from her parents, and started
for the Bret town across the Pennsylva
nia line, 'to be married, where the cere
mony could be performed without a
license. The Happy pair were accompa
nied by a sister of the girl, a tall, gaunt
'harped featured female of some thirty
sesen summers. The pair crossed the
line; were married, and returned to
Wellsville to pass the night. People
at the hotel where the wedding party
stopped, observed that they conducted
themselvesin a rather singular manner.
The husband would - take his sister-in
law, the tall female aforesaid, into one
corner of the parlor, and talk earnestly
to-her, gesticulating wildly all the time.
Thini the ,
tall female would "put her
foot down" and talk to him in an angry
and excited manner. Then the husband
would take his fair, young bride into a
corner; but he would no sooner com
mence talking to her than the gaunt
sitter would rush in between them and
angrily join in the conversation. The
people at the hotel ascertained what
this meant about nine o'clock that eve
ning. There was an uproar in the
room which had been assigned to the
newly married couple. Female shrieks
and masculine "swears" 'startled the
people in the hotel, - and they rushed to
die spot. The gaunt female was press
iog against the door of the room, and
the newly married man, mostly undress
ed, was barring her out with all his:
might. Occasionally she would kick
the door far enough open to disclose
the stalwart husband, in his Gentleman
Greek-Slave apparel.
It appeared that the tall female ineis-
ted upon occupying the same bed with
the newly wedded pair; that her sister
was favorably disposed to the arrange
roWnt, and that the husband had agreed
to it before the wedding took plaCe, and
now indignantly repudiated the contract.
Won't you go away now, Susan ?"
said the newly married man, softening
his voice.
"No," said she, "1 won't—so there;!'
" Don't you budge an inch 1" cried
the married sister, within the room.
"Now—now, Maria," said the young
man to his • wife, in a piteousLtone,
"don't go to cuttin' up in this way ; now
don't."
" cut up's much as I waster
she sharply replied.
"Well," roared the desperate man,
throwing the door wide open an& stalk.
ing out among the crowd, "jest you
two wiminiu' put on your duds and go
right straight home and bring back the
old man and woman, and your grandfath
er, who is nigh on to a hundred ; bring
'em all here, and marry the whole
d--d caboodle of 'em, and-we'll all sleep
together I"
The.difficulty was finally adjusted by
the tall . female taking a roam. Wells
villeis
enjoying itself overthe.sensation.
—Cleveland Plaindealer.
MAN AND WOMAN.—Man is strong—
woman is beautiful. Man is daring. and
,
confident—woman is diffident and unas
suming. Mania great in aotion—woman
in "
suffering. Man shines abroad— wom
an at home. Man talks to convince—
woman to persuade and please. Man
has a rugged heart—iviiman a soft and
tender anis. Man prevents misery—wo
man relieves it. Man has science—
woman taste. Man has judgement—
woman
sensibility. Man is a being of
justicn—woman of mercy.
WESTERN ELOQUENC%—"Where is
Europe compared to America ? Now.
liar. They call England the mistress of
the sea,' buewhat makes the sea ? The
Mississippi mates it, and all we've got
to,do is to turn the Mississippi into the
Mammoth Cave, and the English navy
will be floundering in the mud."
or A distinguished California divine
was asked after a trip to silver land,
"'What, he thought of the country ?'
He replied, "There are but three things
in Washoe, sir, big mines, little mines,
and whiskey
,ohoPii; in other words
ophir holes, tophir holes, and loafer
:holes."
•
or "What flower of beauty shall I
*dry r •aaisfit handsome young Spend
%MN* lib Miserly governor. To which
the governor replied. with a grim smile,
",Mari "
Ez-Presidebt - PierSe is very low
with ohmic_ dicnt owl, tending to ul
°oration., with little precpeet DI reetivevy.
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