G
BY MEDI( L. BAKER.
D R. ROOFLAW D'S
GERMAN BITTERS,
Prepared by Dr. C. M. Jai.kson,
Philadelphia, Pa.
IS NOT A BAR-ItuuM DitINIC, OR A
SUBSTITUTE FOR RUM,
Or an Intoxicating Beverage, but a highly con
centrated Vegetable Rxtract, a Pure Tonic,
het from alcoholic stimuleut or injurious drugs,
and Will effectually cure
Liver Complaint,
Dyspepsia, and •
HGOPLANO'S GERDIAN BITTIIRS
WILL, CURE EVERY CASE OF
Chronic or Nervous Debility, Disease of the
Kidneys, and Disease, arising from a
Disordered Stomach.
0119EIRVE THE FOLLOWING SYDIPTOIAS
resulting from disorders of the digestive organs:
I.;uustipation, In ward Piles, Fuaress or stood
to the Head, Acidity of the Stomach, Nausea,
Hes:lbw - li ' Disgust for Food, Fullness or
weight lit the Stomach', sour eructations, sink
.lnt7 or fluttering of the Pit of the Stomach,
zwiturning of the Head, hurried and difficult
steaming, fluttering at tht heart, choking . or
suffocating sensations when in a lying postirre,
, fia.ness of vission, dots or webs before the
sight, fevet and dull pain in the head, defici
ceo of perspiration, yellowness of the skin
sod eyes, pain in the side, back, chest, limbs,
tc., sulklon flushes of heat, burning in the flesh,
obstant immiteinings of evil, and great do
ves:duo of spirits.
HOOFLANP'S GEFIMAN BITTERS.
I=
A Good .4 rpefiu e ,
Strong Aims,
11,aithy
.teaffy Nerves,
Finals Peding3,
.k.rierget ie. Feelings,
tioany Feelings,
A GOOli Constitution,
A strong Constitution,
A Healthy Constitution,
A Sound Constitution
I~tlt. MAKE TILE NVE.S.W. 5T1054,
Will Make the
Delicate lies' ty,
Will make the
IV'IL make Coe
Depressed Lively,
Will make the
Sallow Complexion Clear, •
Will make the Dull eye
Clear and Wight.
1Y 6~lill proves blearing iu evciy
..i - Can be timid with perfect satciy iiy male
or Female, Old, or Young.
P.l. ILT ICI JI4Alt NOTICE.
Tr me are many preparations soil tinder the
of put up in quart bottles, coin
ot the cheapest Whiskey or eutamou
huts, coating from 20 to 40 cents per gallon,
to l4sie disguised by ARM: or Culiander seed.
Ti's eitollof Bitters has caused and will con
dlit.e to cringe, as long as they can be sold,
.14reateds 10 .iie Ike death of a drunkard. Ily
their tae the system is kept continually under
tile influenCe of alCohullC atitou a..ts of the
worst limit, the desire for liquor is create•t and
kept up, and the result is nit the horrors at-
V.:dant upon a drunkard's life and death. lle
u,..te of them.
For those who desire and will have a liquor
bitters, we publish the following receipt:
Get one bottle flop land's German Bitters and
tuts. with three quarts* of good Whiskey or
Brandy, and the result will be a preparation
that will far excel in medicinal virtues and
true excellence any of the numerous liquor
bitters in the market, and will c,t much leas.
You will have all.the virtues of Havfland's .tht-
Ins in connectirin with a good article of liquOr
and at a Truth less price then these inferior
preparations will cost you.
DELICATE CH ILD
These suffering from mura.4ins, wasting
away, with scarcely any flesh on their bones
are cured in a very short time; one bottl.•
irr
such cases, have moat surprising effect.
DERILaY,
Resulting from levers of any kind—these bit
tin will renew your strength in a short time.
i'xv.ex AND *QUE.—The chills will not re
turn if these ilittets are used. No person in a
frier and ague district should be without them
Erem Rtv. J. Newton Brown, D. D.. Editor
f
the Encyclopedia of Beteg - was Knowledge.
Mt hough not disposed to favorer reecimmend
Psient Medicines in general; through distrust
1 their ingredients and effects; 1 yet know
of
no static% int reason why a ruart ma) not tee
toy to the benefits be believes himself to have
reveived from any simple 'preparation, in the
that lie may thus cuutribute to the bone-
Et ut other,.
I do this tiore'readily in regard to Ifooflaird's
'German Bitters, prepared bIlDr. C. M. Jackson
because I Wad prejudiced against them for a
ntonber of years, under the Impression that
they were Overfly au alcohelic.mixture. lam
indebted to thy friend Rolet Shoemaker, esq.,
fur the rethoval of this prejudice' by proper
tests, and fqr encouragement to try them', when
suffering from great and long debility. The
tlat‘ of three bottles of these bitters, at the be
ginning of, the present year, was followed by
eV•detit relief, and restoration to a degree of
h° oll l* and 'mental vigor which 1 lied nut felt
for six montio *Ore, and had almost &sparr
ed of regaining. I therefore thank Ged and
my friend fot directing me to the use of them.
NZWTON BROWN..
Philadelphia, June 23, 1362.
A 1".IIIINTI ON, .50L E I IS_
AND THS FRIENDS . OF SOLDIERS.
We call the attention of all having relations
or friends in the army to the fact that a Hoof
land's German Bitters" will cure nine-tenths
of the disease S induced by privation ,and ex
p mines incident to cainp life. In the lists
published'almost duily in the newspapers, on
the arrii al of the sick, it will be noticed that
a„v.rrY large proportion are suffering from 'cle
,",tr. Eveiy case of that kind can be readi
iY cure by Iloodand's German 'litters. We
have no hesitation in stating that, if these bit
ters are freely used among our soldiers, hund
reds of- lives might be saved that otherwise
would be lost.
The proprietors ire daily e
receiVin
ny and g thaspnkfui
-1
letters from auftrers in th ari bo
tals,who hare been restored to healt h tiy the use
of these Bitter's. dent to them by their friends.
Beware of counterfeits See that the sig
nature of "C. Al. Jackson; is on the wrapper
of each bottle. to
ZR IS.
Larze Size, $1:ou per bottle, or dozen for $5.
Medium size, ,76c per bottle, or g dozen for $4.
The larger size, on account of the quantity
the bottles hold, are much the cheaper.
Should your nearest druggist not have the
article, do not be put ditty any of the intosti-
Ming prepartitt tarot ` my: be, °geoid in Ito
Place, but tort to us, and we will forward,
securely packed . by.express.
PrinfJpatffla ankiklanufaelmy..
NOl A actt
JONES tir, EVANS,
(SugctelliWrato 0., 2.1. Jaokson Sr, C 0.,)
Proprietors.
Vats and , dealers ip ever,
'aeltee. „MP* 17
EI=IMI
/F:J. #t .A;'''''n ar.i..-tt:iait
altikptnknt Vennstribaula Purnal: gtbattb to ok r aYiteraturt, ggricutture, fetus of Oc Yarat
ipubtiztuir tbtrp Zaturbap sliorning
OFFICE: CRITICS Row, Frnnt Street, five
S doors below .Flurv's Hotel.
Trams, One Dollar a year, payable in ad
vance, acd if subscriptiors he not paid within
six months $1.25 will be charged, but if de
layed until the expiration of the year, $1.50
will be charged.
ADVERT Ist MG RAZES; Otte square (12
litter!, Or lass) 50 centslor the lirst insertion and
25 cents for each subsequent insertion. Pro
fessional and Ili:witless caids,'of six lines or less
at $3 per annum. Notices in the residing col
umns, fire cents a-line. Marriages and Deaths,
the simple announcement, FREE; but for any
additional lines, Live cents a line.
A liberal deduction made to yearly and half
yearly adVertisers.
Jaundice
Having recentled added a large lot of new
Job and Lard type, Cuts, Borders; &c., to the
Job Office of "The Mariettian," which will
insure the fine execution of all kinds of JOB SZ
CARD PRINTINO, from the smallest
Card to thelargist Poster, at prides to suit the
War 'times.
, .
..,
REFLECTIONS,
i
._,......_.
Ah I here it Is, Pro famous no w-r-
Aii author and a poet I
It really is in print ! Ye Gods I
How proud I'll be to show' it I
And gentle tiessy, what a thrill
Will animate her breast,
To read those ardent lines, and know
To whom they are addrlssed !
"They look so"—What? I red:Mea—
n:was "sweet," and then twas "kind,"
And now to think—the stupid fool I
Fur "blend" has printed '•blind."
Was ever such provoking work ?
'Tis curious by the by,
How Anything is rendered blind
1:y giving it uu eye !
"The color of the rose" is "nose,"
"Affection" is "affliction"—
.1 wonder if the likeness holds•
In fact as well as fiction.
"Thou Arta friend"—the r is gone
- Whoever would hiive dreamed.
That such a trilling thio4 could change
A "friend" Lao a " fiend."
Thin Stout,
"Thou art the same," is rendered "lame,"
It really is too bad;
And here. because an i is out,
My lovely maid is "mad."
They made her blind by poking in
An eye—a process new—
And now they've gouged it out again,
And made her crazy too.
"Where are muses fled that thou
Shoultt'st live so long unsung,"
Thus read my version ; here it
"Stinted live so long unhung."
"The fate of woman's live is thine,"
An it commences ''fate;"
How small a circumstance will turn
. A woman's love to "hate !"
I'll read TIO more—what shall I do
I'll never dare to send it!
Till paper's scattered far and widc , —.
vris now lon late to mead it.
0 fate! thou cheat of human bliss!
Why (IW I ever write I
I wish my poem had been burnt
Before it sew the light.
I do dislike the married fife—
Its comforts 1 detest;
Saturday nights end washing days,
Sundays end all the rest.
An men have their antipathies,
And mine are centred here,
I'll never be a married man,
A husband—it is clear.
But then -I have a loving heart,
A. gentle, yielding." mind,
And bear a vast alli•ctiou fur
Ina 'whole el womankind;
And lately I've had ea.ase to fear
l\ly dreaded iMoin is cast;
A pair of eyes will iiiake.of me
A married man at last I
I do dislike Miss Fanny Wright,
And think her s)stein wrung;
'Without at least a book and priest,
'Twere bard to get along.
But then, you ,iee 1 would. be free,
And range the w cad around.
0; 1' cannot cansent to be
With tipuen's fetters bound.
I never loved a business life,
As married men must do,
I never could support a wife,
.A,duzen children too;
Though I have heard a poet sing,
In numbers most divine,
The beauties of the "cotton trade,"
And of the ."sugar line I"
Bur new. alas, with love I burn,
Alaek, what skull I do?
I'd:ire not seek a fond retire,
For wedlock must ensue.
Oh ! Cupid, 'twas u wicked deed
On me your Npvils to Cast—
Two lovely eyes will make of me
A married mall at tot
I have en a,h-silk quaker-dress;
My foot is very small,
I Imes a plain drab frock, also
A spotless biond lace shawl;
I have withal a dark s ft eye,
W.th hisoes uvet,
Such as might thaw the heart almost
Of any trusty lover.
I have a pair ut ruby lips,
A forehead like the snow ;
And cheeks, such richly colored ones,
As lovers iii.e, you snow.
I have a pious, modest Wm:,
A waveless calm within ;
Like Eden's, at the moutlit when
The serpent entered in.
My bonnet weighs but half an ounce;
Yet nearly !Oats from hie
The very youth, to speak the truth,
I Walk the streets to see.
1 dare nut gaze around at ull,
The elder 4 would rebuke,
And I should be at once by all
My steady 'vends forsook.
Iti hat can 1 du, dear editor l
Thou wightst know what I mean
I Want a mutual friend—} ou see—
A bo.V. Lit "go betwkeu
I want to marry out of church,
How graceful I shall be
waneto be a "w:irld's Woman,"
,6 World's man's"' the man for me.
Our devil nays Mist gectiog in love
in somewhat li
more a•. 11aat di
MAA'ED LIFE,
THE QUAKERESS,
MARIETTA, PA., SATURDAY, JUNE 4, 1864.
A Romance
The traveller who has been fortunate
enough to sit beside an unknown beauty
in .a railway carriage, and had his con
versational powers brought into play by
her spirit of sociability, can comprehend
the , bliss of a good-looking bachelor,
whose car adventure we are about tore
late.
This worthy gentleman was a passen
ger on the Central Railroad, last week,
and . happened to be in the car that was
pretty well stocked with humanity, lie
had managed to retain a seat at the com
mencement of the journey, until the train
reached a stopping-.place, where a fresh
supply of passengers entered it, when
he gallantly suritutiered•it to-an old la
dy, and made up his mind to stand a
while. Now it happened that a young
and stylish looking lady noticed the act,
and so pleased was she to see au old
woman treated politely, that she at once
removed her carpet-bag from the end of
the seat she occuitied, and invited "the
gentletnau to take its place. Nuthiag
loth, our here accepted the modest in
vitation, and was soon engaged iu a-frien
dly conversation With the belle of the
train. They chatted in lively style un
til the "shades of night were falling fast,"
when the lady's utterance grew slower,
then iudistinct,*and then altogether ceas
ed, for she was asleep.
Not being disposed to follow her ex
ample, the gentleman amused himself by
watching his fellow passengers. and was
retniuded of his compauion's presence
by her head touching Lis shoulder.
Morpheus had her completely in his folds,
and by a series of graceful nods she mi.
cunsciously sought the support of her
guiltmid acquaintance.
The bAchelor was delighted at the first
gentle touch, but hi, pleasure, when, in
the abandunnieut of sleep, her form nes
tled do .en until its whole weight bore
down entirely upon him, baffles descrip
tion. The better to support his lovely
burden, he placed his arm urouud her
waist, and then gave himself up to the
delirium of the moment. After passing
the next station, a gentleman eutered
the cur containing the persona above re
ferred to, end comineuced examining
the faces of each occupant, as though he
was in smirch of seine friend. In the"
dirkuess of the hour he passed the.sleep
er and her supporter without noticing
them, and it was only when he turned to
retrace his steps that the scene attract
ed his atteution. In a moment the shade
of anxiety uu his features was succeed
ed by IL frown, as he stepped quickly to
the side of the fair sleeper. As his
hand descended heavily upon her , should
er, she started, opened her eyes, sprang
to her feet, "blushing celestial rosy red."
—Before the bachelor could speak. the
new comer politely informed him that
he could take care of his own wife, if he
had nu Objectiuns; and straight-way led
the lady to another seat.
The explatottibu that ensued unfolded
the fact that the lady had been absent
on a visit for sonic time, and was then
returning to the faithful husband, whose
impatience led him to meet her half way.
Eager to meet her, tie had entered the
ear only to bud her in the ut:fus at, a stran
ger 1 , Of course the stranger told how
it happened ; .but the trowe did not pass
away from the brow of the husband nu
til they left the car. Letites should be
careful how they lid, alee•p 0..1 the wrung
vest pattern.
"(Jo ahead" is America, it is writ
ten on everything, from a plow Le a tele
gram. We are not- always sure we're
right, but nevertheless we go. A little
taster, a little fiirther. a little stronger,
a little longer, hut all wrapped up in the
word go." - It wont.: be well for us to
oar a little ilil.ernian wit on the pro
gress. Our rrader, all recolivet the
ready ant; w, , e or the Irish huckm4o.
"Obey my orders," said his haiwdity
muster, "if i under on to drive to
11-1." "du' sure 31) . 1 will,yer honor,'
answered Pat : "but ye'z IMlzt excuse me
if I back )e'z in."
t o- "flurry, did you ask Hicks for
that money?" "Yes," "11 hat did he
say ?" "Nothing ; he just, kicked me
into the road. That's ati he said."
611, - It is !ittra tiotibles that wear the
heart out ; it is easier to throw a bomb
shell a mite time a feather--eveh with
ai ti le ry
to - ' lle lovelteA facer, are to tie
seen
by loounlight, whrn wee sees half with
the eye and hall with the [awry..
Anecdote of the Duke of Bacclough.
The Duke of Banclaugh, in one of his
walks, purchased a COW from a person
in the neighborhood of Dalkeith, and
left orders to send it to his place the
following morning. According to agree
ment, the cow was sent, and the Duke,
happening to be in a dishabille, and
walking in the avenue, spied a little
fellow ineffectually attempting to drive
the animal forward to its destination.—
The boy not knowing the Duke, bawled
out to him
'l-leh, 03111:1, come here and give's a
han' wi' the beast."
The Duke saw the mistake and deter
mined on having a joke with the little
fellow. Pretending, therefore, not to
understand him, the Duke walked on
slowly, the boy still craving his assist
ance ; at last he cries in tones of appa
rent distress :
"Come here, mun, and help us, and as
sure's buything, I'll give you the half
o' wht'l get."
This last salutation had the desired
effect; the Duke went and lent a help
ing hand.
"And now," said tha Duke, as they
trudged along, "how much do you think
you'll get for this job ?"
"Ou, I dinna ken," said the boy, "but
the folk up by at the house are good to
a bodies."
As they approached the house, the
Duke darted from the boy, and entered
by another way. He .called a servant,
pot a sovereign into his hand, saying:
"Give that to the boy that h.is just
brought the cow."
The Duke returned to the avenue, and
was soon rejoined by the boy.
••Well, how much' did you get?' in
quirer! the Duke.
"A. shilling," said the boy ; "and
there's the bull o't t' ye."
"But surely you 'got more than a shit.
ling?" said the Duke.
"No," said the boy with the utmost
earnestness ; "as sure as death that's a'
1 got ; and d'ye no think its plenty?"
"I do not," said the Duke, 'there
must be some mistake ; and as I am ac
quainted with the Duke, if you'll return
with me, I think get you more."
The boy consented; back they went
—the Duke rang the bell, and ordered
all the servants to be assembled.
"Now," said the Duke to the boy,.
"point out the person that gave you . the
shilling."
'lt was that chap there wi' the *bite
apron," pointing to the butler. ,
The delinquent confessed; or hi
knees, and attempted to apologize; but
the Duke interrupted him, and indig
nantly ordered him to, give the boy the
sovereign forthwith and quit his service
instantly.
"Yoh' have lost," said the Thike, "your
shtlling, k your situatiod, and your charac
ter, by your covetousness'; learn, hence
fort 15, that:honesty is the bebt policy."
The boy by this time recognized his
assistant in the. person of the Doke, and
the Duke was so delighted with the
sterling worth and honesty of the boy
t \ .liat he ordered him to be sent to school,
kept there, and provided for at his own
expense.
LADIES vs. GENTLEMEN : Three tlings
that a latly cannot do
Ist. She ciinuot pass a millinery shop
without stopping..
2d. She cannot see a pieee of lace
without askini the price.
31. She cannot see a baby without
kissing it.
A lady of our acquaintance turns the
tables on the gentlemen as follows :
Three things a gentleman cannot do :
let, Ile cannot go through the house
awl shut the door after him:
2d. Ile cannot have a shirt made to
suit`hon.
3d. He can never be satisfied with
the ladies' fashions.
tkir A few days ago Mr. George Rohr
baugh Wit I found dead one mile from
Llanover, N. It seems that Mr. R. bad
been to town the evening previous on
some business, and while on his way
home he was thrown from his horse and
fell into a pond of mud and water, where
be was found by some of the neighbors
perfectly lifeless. It is supposed that
he was suffocated, as his face was com
pletely covered with mud.
01-45 - Tkitttuyvesaut Pear Tree, in
New York, is in bloom. abie tree was
I
brought from ;Tolland; db . runs the stor
by Governor Petrol; Stuyvesaut, in 164
and is, therefore, 217 years oldl—by far
oldest object, placed by man on
York, island that can cash .bet re
piked._
From Eight to Sixteen
Lord Shaftesbury recently stated, in
a public meeting in London, that,, from
personal observation, he had ascertained
that of adult male criminals of that city,
nearly alt had fallen into a course of
crime between the ages of eight and six
teen years; and that, if a young man
lived an honest life up to twenty years
of age there were forty-nine chances in
favour, and only one against him, as to
honorable life thereafter.
This is a fact of alligator importance
to fathers and mothers, and shows a fear
ful responsibility. Certainly, a parent
should secure and exercise absolute con
trol over the, child under sixteen. It
cannot be a difficult matter to do this,
except in very rare cases ; and if that
control is not very wisely and efficiently
exercised, it must be the parents' fault;
it is owing to the parental neglect or re
missness. Hence the real scource of
ninety-eight per cent of the real crime
in a country such as England or the
United States lies at the door of the pa
rent. It is a fearful reflection! ,We
throw it before the minds of the fathers
and mothers of our land, and there leave
it to be thought on wisdom, remarking
only as to the early seeds of bodily dis
ease, that they are, in nearly every case
sown between sundown and bedtime, is
absence from the family circle; in the
supply of spending money never earned,
by the spender—opening -the doors of
confectionaries and soda fountains, of
beer tobacco and wine shop; of the cir
cus, the restaurant and dance—then fol
lows the Sunday excurtion, to the com
pany of those whose ways lead to the
gates, of social, physical and moral ruin.
From eight to sixteen—in these few
years—are the destinies of children fixed
in forty.n me cases out of fifty- 2 -fixed by
the parents! Let every father and motri-:
er solemnly vow, "By God's help, I'll
fix my darling's destiny for good,- by
making home more attractive than the
streets!"
REI3M, GENE:RAI, PORREST.-4.
ter received from Major General L.
Stanley, and which appears in the Cin
cinnati GetainerCial, gifts the following
statement in regard to the rebel Gener
al Forrest.- I.t.says that to those in front
of our army who know Forrest. hit' .qpn
duct at Fort Pillow is not in theleast as :
tonishing. Aboni, the middle.of the sum
mer of 1862 Forrest surprised the part,
of Murfreesboro' commanded by Bi iga
dier General Crittenden, of lodi
ana ; the garrison . being composed mostly
of the , 9th Michigan Minnesota
iofautr'y add the ith PennsYlvania catz
airy. After some fighting the troops
surrendered. A mulatto Man, who was
a servant - to one of the, officers of the
Union forces, was brought out to For
rest on.horiseback. The latter inquired
of him, with niany•oaths, "What he' was
doing there 1" The mulatto replied
that be was a free man, and came out as
a servant to an•officer—uaming the offi
cer. Forrest, who was on horsebaek,:
deliberately put bis hand to his holster,
drew his pistol, and blew, the man's brains
out. This 'revelation was made to Ma
jor General Steely last summer by a citi
zen of Middle Tennessee, who was a man
of high standing in the cetetnueity, and
who had it from his nephew, an officer
under Forre.t. The statement adds
that the mulatto came from Pennsylva
nia, and the officer who furnishes it de
clares he would never again serve under
Forrest.
BUGS.—As the season of bogs ap
proaches it will be well to bear in,mind
the advice of the Country Gentleman.
Housekeepers not desirous of being
carried out of the world by bugs, will he
glad to learn that they cannot stand hot
alum water. Take two pounds of alum,
bruise it, and reduce it to powder, die
solve it in three quarts of water; let it
remain in a warm place till the alum is
dissolved. The alum water is to be ap
plied, by means of a brush, to every
joint and crevice. Brush the crevices
in the fluor, whitewash the ceiling, put
ting in plenty of alum, and there will
be an end to their dropping thence.
lIEW A little boy, on coming hgrne
from a certain church where he had seen
a person perform on an organ, said to
his mother--Oh, mamma, I wish you
had been
.to church to-day to see the
fun—a man pumping music on an
old „ a : hoard !"
"Nla, why is a postage stamp like a
Lad scholar?"
"I can't-tell,- my son, why is it?"
"Because' it gets lidltell and put
. •
corner;" ,
"Susan put that, bhg to bed."
VOL. 10.--NO. 44.
THE MAJESTIC MARCH OF TRUTH. The
old fogy nations of Greece and Rome
were much given to making demigode of
their favorites. They even deified their
physicians. It would have been quite
.as reasonable to have made gods of their
butchers, imagine the stupidity of pay
ing divin.e honors to such know-nothings
as Galen and Hippocrates. dud yet,
after all, the "profession" at the present
day has not advanced so very far ahead
of its founders. True, great discoveries
have been made ip physiology, and vast
improvements in surgery ; but the re
sources of the materia medico have not
been correspondingly augmented. The
present century, however, has witnessed
one grand medieal triumph—the com
plete and universal success of Holloway's
Pills and Ointment' as remedies fcr in
ternal and external diseases. They
would seem to have triumphed everr
where over liver and powel complaints,
scrofula, and many other fearful maladies
and in no part of the world where they
have been introduced has their success
been more signal than in the United
States. The onward march of these
preparations for a period of twenty-five
years has been a phenomenon. Starting
from the central point of London, they
have reached remotest India, penetrated
Africa, pervaded Europe, and become
(within a few years) household medicines
in all parts of North and South Ameri
ca, whilst in Australasia the demand
for them is immense. With their prog
ress has expanded into its present gi
gantic proportions the most prodigious
system of advertising that the world has'
ever seen. One man—Professor Hollo
way—individually controls all this grand
medicaland commercial ectime, with its
almost unlimited correspondence, agen
cies, shipments, &c. None other than
a great mind could have accomplished
so great a worh.—"Nat. Police Gazette."
Da. FRANKLIN'S TOMM—Long after
the victories of Washington over the
French and English had made his name
familiar to all Europe, Dr. Franklin
chanced to dine with the English and
French Ambassadors, when as nearlyas
the precise words can be recollected,
the following toasts were drank;
England—The Sun whose bright
beams enlighten and fructify the remo
test corners of the earth.
The French Ambassador filled with
national pride, but being'too polite to
dispute the previous toast, drank the
following,
France—The Moon whose mild, steady
and cheering rays are the delight of all
nations, consoling them in darkness, and
making their dreariness beautiful,
Dr. Franklin then. rose, and, with hie
usual.dignided simplicity, said :
GEORGE WASHINGTON— The Joshua
who commanded the Sun and Moon to
stand still; and they obeyed him.
CONJUGATION AND AGREEN4NT.-111
lesson . in parsing. the sentence, "man,
courting capacity of bliss," etc, the word
courting comes to a pert young miss of
fourteen to parse. She commenced,
hesitatingly, but got along well enough
until she was to tell what it agreed with.
Here she stopped short- But as the
teacher, said, Very ,well, what does
courting agree , with,?' Ellen blushed
and hung down her head. "Ellen, don't
you know what it agrees ..,with'?! Ye—
ye—yes, air!" "Well, Ellen; why don't
you parse the word ? What does it agree
with? Blushing still more and stammer
ing, Ellen says "It a—a agrees with ell
the girls, sir 1"
SETTLED.—John Dandera' s, country
black.smith, the husband of ajoung wife,
bad labored long and become wealthy,
having the custom,of all the farmers a.
round. W hen he was on his death,hed,,
he called his wife Janet, to 4114
"Janet," said be. "I am not long for
this world; I am wearing away very fast,
Now, concerning the business, Janet,
Andrew, the foreman, he knows
all about the shop, and the customers all
like him. You will just let a decent
time elapse and then make up together."
"Oh, my dear John !" said Janet,
bursting into a flood of tears, "don't let
that trouble you ; Andrew sad I have
settled that already."
ter "My son,:' said the elder Sprig
gles to Spriggles junior, thinking to en
lighten the boy on the propagation of
the hen species—"my soo, do' you know
that chickens come out of eggs 2" "Do
they 2" said Spriggles junior, as he
licked his plate ; "I thought eggs came
'out ot chickene." Thas ended the first
lesson.
"How sharp your toe- mils are," at
Paddy raid when be.oaright-the hornet.