The Mariettian. (Marietta [Pa.]) 1861-18??, September 19, 1863, Image 1
BY FRED'K L. BAKER. Not Illtmbolft. I Highly Concentrated Vegetable Extract. A PURE TONIC. DR. HOOFLAND'S GERMAN BITTERS PREPARED BY DR, C. M. JACKSON, PIIIL'A, PA. WI L L effectually cure Liver Complaint, Dyspepsia, Jaundice, chronic or nervous Debility, diseases of the Kidneys, and bad dis eases arising from a disordered Liver or Stom ach. Such as Constipation, inward Piles, fel ness or blood to the bead, acidity of the Stom ach, Nausea, Heartburn, disgust for food, ful- ness or weight in the stomach, sour Eructations, sinking or fluttering at the pit of tne Stomach, swimming of the Head, hurried and difficult Breathing, fluttering at the Heart. choking or suffocating sensations when in a lying posture, dimness of Vision, dots or webs before the Sight, fever and dull pain in the Head, defi ciency of Perspiration, yellowness of the Skin and Eyes pain in the Side, Back, Chest, Limbs, &c., sudden flushes of Heat, burning in the Flesh, constant imaginings of Evil, and grief, depression of Spirits. And will positively prevent Yellow Fever, Billions Fever Sm.— They contain no Alchohol or bad Wnisky.— They wxLL CURE the above diseases in ninety nine cases out of a hundred. The proprietors have thousands of letters from the most;eminent Clergymen. Lawyers, Physicians, and Citizens, testifying of their own pers..nal' knowledge, to the beneficial ef fects and medical virtues of these Bitters. Do you want something to strengthen you ? Do you want a good appeCte ? Do you want to build up your constitution? Do you want to feel well? Do you want to get rid of Ner voutineas Do you want energy? Do you want to sleep well Do you want a brisk and vigorous feeling? If you do, use HOOFLAND'S German Bitters. PARTICULAR NOTICE.—There are many preparations sold under the name of Bitters, put up in quart bottles, compounded of the cheapest whisky or cenunon iutn, costing from 20 to 90 cents per gallon, the taste disguised by Anise or Coriander Seed. . This class of Bitters has caused and will con tinue to cause, as long as they can be sold, hundreds to die the death of the drunkard.— By their use the system is kept continually under the influence of alchoholic stimulants of the worst kind, the desire for liquor is created and kept up, and the result is all the horrors attendant upon a drunkard's life and death. For those who desire and will-have a Liquor. Bitters, we publish the following receipt Get one bottle of iloofland's Bitters and miX with three quarts of good brandy or whisky, and the result will be a preparation that will far excel in medicinal virtues and true excellence any of the numerous Liquor Bitters in the Market, and will cost much less. You: will have all the virtues of Hoodand's Bitters in connection with a good article of liquor, at a much less price than these inferior prepara tions will cost you. ATTENTION SOLDIERS I We call the atten tion of all having relations or friends in the army to the fact that illloolland's German Bitters" will cure nine-tenths of the diseases induced by exposures and privations incident to camp life. In the lists, published utmost daily in the newspapers, on the arrival of the sick, it will be noticed that a very large pro portion are suffering from debility. Every case of that kind can no readily cured by Hoofland's German Bitters. Diseases result ing from disorders of the digestive organs are speedily removed. We have no hesitation in stating that, if these Bitters were freely used among our soldiers, hundreds of lives might be saved that otherwise will be lost. We tall the particular attention to the fol lowing remarkable and well authenticate, cure of one of the nation's heroes, whose life to use his language, "has been saved by the Bitters :" PHILADELPHIA, August 23d, 1862 Messrs. Jones rf Eveans.— Well, gentleman, your Hoofland's German Bitters have saved my life. There is no mistake in this. his vouch ed for by nein hers of my comrades some of whose names are appended, and whoi are fully cognizant of all the circumstances army case. I am, and have been fur the last four years, a member of Sheanun's celebrated buttery, and under the immediate command of Cap tain R. B. Ayres. Through the exposure at dant upon my arduous duties, I was attack ed in November last with influmation of the lungs, and was fur seventy-two days in the hospital. This was followed by great debility, heightened by an attack of dyseirtary. I was then removed from the White Blouse, and sent to this city on board the Steamer "State of Maine," from which . I landed on the 2Sth, of June. Since that time 1 have been about us low as any one could and still retain a spark of vitality. For a wtek or more I was scarcely able to swallow anything, and if I did force a iIIOYSSI down, it was immediately thrown up again. I could not even keep a glass of water on my stomach. Life could not lust under these circumstances: and, accordingly, tile physi cians who had been working faithfully, though unsuccessfully to rescue me from the grasp of the dread Archer, frankly told me they could do no more for me; and advised me to see a clergyman, and to make such disposi tion of my limitei funds as best suited me.— An acquaintance who visited me at the hospi tal, Mr. Frederick SteinDron, of Sixth below Arch street, advised me, as a forlorn hope, to try y our Bitters, and kindly pretured a bottle. From the time commenced takinonem the gloomy shado 0 of deathreceded, and I am how, thank Gad for it, getting bettor. Tho' I have taken but two bottles, I have gained ten pounds, and I feel sanguine of being per mitted to rejoin my wife and daughter, from whom j have heard nothing for ei.,qhteell months: for, gentlemen, I am a loyal Virgin ian, from the vicinity of Front Royal. To your invaluable Bitters I owe the certainty of life which has taken the plueo of 'vague fears —to your Bitters owe the glourious pri vilege of again claiping to my bosom those who are dearest to me in life. Very truly yours, ISAAC MALONE. We fully concur in the truth of the above statement, as we had despaired of seeing our comrade, Mr. Malone, restored to health. Cuddlebackc, Ist New York Battery. GeorBe A. Ackley, Co. C., 11th Maine. Lewis Chevalier, 9241 New York. I. E. spencer, Ist Artillery, Battery F. J. B. Fasewell, Co. B, 3d Vermont. Henry B. Serome, Co. B. do. Henry T. Macdonald, Co. C. 6th Maine. John F. Ward, Co. E. sth Maine. Nathaniel - B. Thomas, Co. F., 95th Penn . . John Jenkins, Co. B. 106th Penn. Beware of counterfeits ! See that the sig-. nature of Jackson," is on the wrapper of each bottle. Price per bottle 75 cents, or half dozen for e 4.00. Should your nearest druggist not have the article, do not beilut olt by any of the intoxi cating preparations that may be offered in its place, but send , to us, and we will forward, securely packed, by express. P rincipal Office and Manufactory, No. 631 ARCH STREET. JONES ~& EVANS, (Successors to C. M. Jackson & Proprzetors. , opsale by,.Druggista and Dealers in evyty town in the United States. 4/it VI ar t to-A tube to vtunsibuia gournal : gam to volitits, Yittraturt, a g riculturt, Ettus tie ging, linal 4nttilignct, alarittlian IS PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY, AT u: ttc 3111allat it—vax ; Vaaatit in Obi= o pp reE: CRULL'S Row. Front Street, five 5 doors below Flury's Hotel. TERMS, One Dollar a rear, payable in ad vance, aed if subscriptiovs he not paid within six months $1.2.5 will be .charged, but if de layed until the expiration of the year, $1.50 will be charged. ADVERTISING RATES: One square (12 lines, or less) 50 cents for the first insertion and 25 cents for each subsequent insertion. Pro fessional and Business cal ds; of sixiines or less at $3 per aanum. Notic..s tu the reading col umns, five cents a-line. Marriages and Deaths, the simple announcement, FREE; but for any additional lines, five cents a line. A liberal deduction made to yearly and half yearly advertisers. Having recentled added a large lot of new Job and Card type; Cuts, Borders, tkc., to the Job Office of " The Alariettian," which will insure the fine execution of all kinds of Jon & CARD PRINTING, from the smallest Card to the largest Poster, at prices to suit the War times. Are they truly dying, All the summer leaves? Will the blasts of autumn Strip the happy trees ? Bright the glowing foliage Paints the misty air— Crimson, purple, golden— Must they die—so fair? Where has down the snnshine Wooed them to their birth, Tempting them to flutter Far above the earth Ruthless did it leave them In their hour of bioem, Let the chill blasts whisper Tales of death and doom ! Rapidly they robed them, In each varied hue, Hoping thus the sunshine To attract annw ; But the tickle glitter Looked in anger down, Freezing up the life pulse With an icy frown. Thar the happy radiance Sinks to rise no more; Leave;s of gold and crimson Strew earth's gloomy floor. Gone their summer glory, Lifeless, lost, they He ; Wilted, withered, drifting As winds will, they fly. Thus in woman's bosom Love wakes bud and bloom, 'heath his glowing sunshine, Thinking not of doom ; Covering soft life's desert Spread the branches green, Hope's bright birds sing thro' them -Close the leafy screen. Through the quivering foliage Valls a sudden fear! Leaves are rustling, trembling— Feel change drawing near! Brighter then they robe them, Call on every hue, Color every fibre— Love to win anew. Summon gold and crimson, Bright as dyed In blood ; Hectic fever flushes Pour in anguished flood ! Gone the heathful quiet Of the summer green ; Hope-birds turn to ravens, Sighs the leafy screen. Love looks down in anger On the wildering show; Freezing follows ehange-frolt— Love heaps ice and snow ! Then the fevered radiance ••„, Fade's from life's doomed trek; Wilted, withered, drifting, Dud, bloom, leaves we, see. Love loeks down upon them, Wanders how it coma— Thinks through all his &zinging i They should bloom the atrial' Did not know his change-froatt Had the power to kill _ Did not dream his frowning Life's guidk pulse could still! Gone the fickle sunshine! Gone the rosy hours; Gone love's early wooing! Gone the, healthful powers Come and cool the hectic, Chill the fevered glow, Pale the crimson flushing, Death, beneath thy snow WIFE AND HUSBAND ALPHABETICALLY. —A wife should be amiable, benevolent, charitable, domestic, economical, for giving, geoerous, honest, industrious, judicious, kind, loving, modest, pleasant, quiet, reflecting, sober, tender, urbaug) virtuous; wise, sensplary, yielding and zealous. A husband should be likewise ; but, says an old maid contribittor, a good mall of thein, alphabetically and uni formly, are absurd., base; captious, de praved, exasperating, false, gloomy, hea thebish, ignorant, jealous;' knappisli, lazy, mean,- nagligent,obdurate, pr i gate, quarrelsome, rash, selfish, taotal\ izing, ugly,. vexing, whimsical, xerba, ting, yawning, and so forth. AUTUNIii LEAVES. MARIETTA, PA., SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 1863. For The Mariettian. BEFORE AND AFTER; or, Five Phases of Married Life, By Grantellus CHAPTER [A ROMANTIC PHASE—Before:l She stood beside the alter, • wreath of orange buds Upon her hair—upon her back "The richest kind of duds." Her lover stood beside her Witli "kidi and dickey" clean, The last was aged twenty-one, The first was seventeen. Many people in this world—perhaps thoughtless people—take only a sort of holiday view of life and its attendant duties ; in fact, they think very, little at all, of its duties and its realities ; for, they seem to imagine all things were made ready to their hand by a species of spontaneous production and repro duction, and that consequently, all they have to do is to appropriate and enjoy its bounties and its blessings, without regard to their intentions, their ability, .or their willirigness;to contribute their share to the general stock of mental and material comforts that are in storeor and that may be obtained by a cheerful exercise of the proper energies, by every member of the human family. These kind of people seem to have no idea of the fact that all things, both in nature and art, are •the results of incessant la bors and tireless effort; and although they may hare had the examples of in dustrious projenitors before them, and may' themselves have labored from ne cessity just sufficiently to have furnished themselves with a superficial education, and to have provided themselves with a scanty yet tawdry wardrobe, and per haps through these means have been enabled to obtain temporarily a situa tion of comparative ease and indolence ; yet, forgetting, or never having knoWn, that true-prosperity depends upon per petual production and - reproduction, connected with judicious systems of barter or eichange, they set themselves up as mere consumers; and as if they had never occupied any other position in society, they manifest an ill-disguised contempt for those who prefer to lead an honest life of industry and usefulness, and who have a just regard for the wel fare of the community at large. It would be well, perhaps, if we could al ways look at the bright side of things, and reflect that God has made this world of ours for us to enjoy and be happy in ; bat it would be also well, and perhaps better, if we could reflect, and look beneath the surface of things, and observe some of the processes, the modes, and the means employed in the transformation of substances from one condition to that of another, and of the labor necessary to accomplish such re sults in nature. But without enumera ting any of the general process of na ture, in perfecting her various substan ces and productions, there is a fast amount of labor required in the field of art, before the crude ores of the earth,, the raw hides of animals, and the "full grown corn in the ear," can be convert ed into substantial and beautiful imple ments of ornament and use ; or the shoes and gloves we wear ; or the bread and its modifications and compounds, we eat. Among all the thoughtless beings on. this score, perhaps there could not have been any two selected, that are better calculated to illustrate this phase of our primary subject, than the two here in troduced. Mister Augustus Leander Pliancy and Miss Laura Amanda Spasm, were a pair of individuals who in an eminent degree took this romantic and impractical view of life— a life of no "every-days" or working days, but on the contrary, all "holidays" and sunny•days. Neither of these worthy individuals seemed to dream that life had any du- ties or realities, other than those imme diately present and connected with their personal , gratifications, and therefore they, never for a single moment permit ted any other than these to enter their minds, or to form an integral part of their-- catalogue of sensuous delights ; nor did they entertain a thought about making the least possible- provision, mentally or materitlly, for any , of, the contingencies, which the stubborn faces of life, are sure in time to develop,— They actually knew but little, and having no appreciation of the proverb, that, "A little learning is a dangerous thing," they therefore contrived to ob tain just enough of that essential ingre dient to a life of.usefulness and proficien cy, as was necessary in giving them the thinnest- - possible external polish, in or der that they might effectually deceive . each other. They were doubtless both °nest and well-meaning in a worldly sense; and may hive thought it perfect, ly in accordance with the principles of "right of justice and of humanity," to practice those little coquettish arts and ruses that are so common in even what is termed the "best society," and from whence they are reflected in diverging radii, in various forms. permeating thro' all the veins and arteries of the different intermediate grades, until they reach the very worst, below. Neither Angus .. tus nor Laura were the offspring of an opulent parentage, nor yet did they be long to the sans culottes, but on the contrary they were of that middling class—or a peculiar grade of it—usually denominated the "well-to-do" in the world. That they had been spoiled in "bringing up," by over-indulgent and il litterate parents, will be strikingly mani fest in the sequel of their histories, and also from the characteristic shiftless, aim less, and indolent life which they had re spectively fallen into, and seemed unable to shake off. "Gnss, '7as he was familiarly called by his special cronies, was an adept in one or two things, and so far did he transcend others in these respects that he became a.remarkable Character . He could "fix up" and wear a "dickey" and cravat, with any other man in the village of Catgut ; and if the cravat is the great fundamental centre of the man—as is so ably claimed for it—and if all else, both mental and material, that inures to him as a living organization, is but subsidiary to that centre, then Mr. Augustus Leander Phancy was the ne plus ultra of a finished gentleman.-- But as if to still farther enhance his ex traordinary qualities, he possessed an other peculiar ability—an ability which many envied himand that was the exquisite and graceful manner in which he could—with a superbly gloved hand —select, hold, fight, puff, remove from between his lips, knock off the ashes, and then return it again, a cigar, no matter as to its quality, from a dime Habanero down to an insignificant "penny-a grab er," It may well be imagined that such an individuality would naturally be the admired of all the ladies of the village, (especially the superficial and the flip pant), as well as the envy of all the gentlemen, (particularly the eeriness and the brainless) ; and that Catgut wag distingushed by such au august presence. If it be alleged as a contradiction in terms, and the essence of terms, that such romantic people could, from choice, be the inhabitants of a village of such a commonplace name as Catgut, we will request the reader to reflect but a single moment, and if the inevitable conclusion is not, that Catgut is not only an un common name—although perhaps in some measure destitute of that euphon eous,jingle so pleasing to cultivated ears —but that all its associations are of the most romantic and poetic character, then he or she is no judge of romance or poetry. Are not the chordS of the violin and violincello, the guitar, the lute and the banjo, as well as the snares of "Le petit tambour," made of .catgut! Are not these the romantic instruments, which more romantic swains employ in serenading still more romantic maidens, on most romantic evenings, in the utmost romantic seasons of the year ? And then the caterwaulings of the animal it self,—from whose dried and twisted in testinal canals, the name is derived,—do they not take place at the romantic hours of the night, and under the shad dows of romantic trees, towers, and chilnneys, on the lawns or the house tops? Undoubtedly so—incontroverta bly so. Miss "Lolly,"—as her friends most affectionately, and most effeminently styled her—when the intercourse be tween them was of the most harmonious - nature—had also her peculiar virtues as well as Mr. Guss, and these were chiefly a pretty foot and ankle, and a most magnificent wasp-like waist; when she was properly stayed, laced and "rigged ;' and these combined, were instrumental in captivating the too suscePtable heart of Mr. Augustus, although , they never could hide her aqualine nose, from more penetrating and less interested observes. Now there was something exceedingly incongruous and contradictory in the form and' contour of Miss Laura, and the harmony of its most striking parts. Her nose *and hands seemed to belong to somebody else, but her waist was de cidedly,neat ; and her feet and ankles exquisitely turned , and trim, and she well knew this, and "Guas" knew it, and they jointly and severally by fulsome praise and sundry , Manipulations on their parts, contrived to let , all the village of, Catgut and die surrounding country also know it. Notwithstanding the great diversity between the leading traits of , chikracierfko--this worthy but luckleSe pair, a sort of affection grew up between them—an affection, however, grounded no deeper than in a transient personal admiration—for if they had been the greatest enemies on earth, they could have adopted no more effective plan for the development of that enmity, than the very -course they were, seemingly, so unconsciously pursuing. Each had an exceedingly vulnerable spot in their mental gourds, and each assailed that weak spot until it was fairly battered through, and then amidst the smoke and din of a double victory and capitulation, they incontinently, yoked themselves to gether in an uncongenial bond that never should have been consummated under Such circudiatances at all. Guss liked above all things in this world, a pretty foot and ankle and a neat waist, without for a-moment thinking about his likes for the individual to whom they belong ed ; and Lolly admired in a supreme sense, a tidy eickey and cravat, npon a graceful puffer of -the noxious weed, without thinking of the nauseous quali ties that might lay -concealed beneath them, and therefore in enhancing and admiring these respective superficial and questionable qualities, all of the real and substantial virtues that may and ought to enter into the composition of the human heart, were entirely over looked, or unceremoniously set aside..., On the one hand was presented the lu dicrous, but by no means rare, spectacle of a man,—or at least a being bearing the material form of a man—coquetting and offering homage to a woman's foot and waist ; and on the other hand a we man—or one who manifested the physi cal outline of a woman—ogling, sighing for, and blindly paying court to a Wunch of muslin and a weeds, manufactured in to a dickey and a cigar. Mistaken mor tals—blind and infatuated Mr. Augustus Leander Phancy—silly and peurile Miss Laura Amanda Spasm—you are not alone in this world, and if your- course has not been all "sugar and honey" in this life, you have the consolation-4f such knowledge be a consolation—of knowing that you are traveling is a large caravan, over the deserts of time. It is not to be implied that all roman tic thoughts and ideas in any of the re lations of life are to be abjured, and that mankind are to come down to the, reali zation of plain, cold and stubborn facts only. These fatigue and oppress, and convert human beings into mere dull moving machines, when there is no re lief from their exercise and control.— Every cultivated human mind ,has an appreciation of the poetry and romance of life, and delights in romantic scenes and reflections ; and even amid the sterner duties of tlni day, will revert to them as a seasoning and a relief to the monotonous routine of other occu pations. Indeed the highest exempli6- cation of romance and poetry will doubt less be found in those Elysian fields be yond the shores of time, "where pleasure never dies ;"-and therefore as a prepa ration for the enjoyment of that elysiutn, it may be proper to cultivate the true romantic and poetic sentiment here.— Therefore, in reciting the history of the "wooing and winning" of Mr. Phancy and Miss Spasm, we do not intend to speak disparagingly of the romantic phase of marriage and married life, but only to hold up to disapproval and dis couragement a romantic phase—a phase which we consider borders very strongly on the ridiculous, if not on the insane. Indeed a distinguished authority has as serted that, "there is only o ne step from the sublime to the ridiculous,". and we are not sure that the worthy pair whose peculiar history we are discussing,. have not taken that step. At all events; instead of cultivating a love . for the uses and duties of life as their substantial meat and drink, and- seasoning tltese with the romantic and the poetic, 'they abjured ,the former nearly altogether, or made only so much use of them as ne cessity-compelled them, in order to ren der their romantic and poetic.pabulum digestable. In this, as we have before hinted, they were not alone, bpt on, the, contrary were traveling along with a large company of impracticals, which may be found at any period and place along the path of time. These are probably not so much the objects of censure or contempt, as they are of pity, for these thing's are-as often the -result of - false systems of education -and of moral training, as they are of the perver sity of the human -heart. False tastes, false readings; false meiles of thought arrd of-dress ; among the high boil--:or those .whiyclalin to be ect--idescena fatal mantles, and tvi4,, more or, less, , cover all below them, no matter bow much., thew . may, e Tea.- to resipt + VOL. 10.--NO. 7. There are ages, and other circumstances too, at which, and under which, it may be more proper to indulge in the romantic and poetic sentiment, than at other ages and under other circumstances. A merely romantic octogenerian, is an object that is more apt to excite' the ridicule of their fellow beings, than one whose suit mers have not yet reached a score ; and yet, a legitimate exercise and indulgence of the true romantic sentiment, in eau the aged and infirm, is not foxbidden, and may conduce to a useful erid. But it must be evident to the reader that it was a perverted or morbid condition of the romantic arid poetic `sentiment that governed thiminds andthe salons, of Mr. Augustus Leander Phaney: iiiid Miss Laura Amanda Spasm ; for, in stead of looking forwarclto the realities Of life as potent and inevitable—dentin gencies that must be encountered:int provided for, these realities were regard ed as myths, or were entirely ignored, or if at all contemplated; they. were dis cussed and viewed - from 'an impractical standpoint. If this phase 'of reliance bad no counterpart in the crinduct of the young and the thoughtless, anterior to marriage, in the present state of so ciety, then it would be altogether un worthy to indulge in a criticism that only desired to create a phantom, in order that it might gratify the morbid delight of dissipating it; but it has a fearful counterpart, in a multitude of cases, differing only in intensity, in de gree, and in modes of manifestation and development. If individual welfare— present and future—was dependentlor anything that is of value to either the body or the soul, upon the cultivation of a small waist'or a neat foot and ankle, in a woman, or a 'starched collar, a dick ey and a cravat, in a inan, then it would become a bounden duty in the sexei to cultivate and acquire , these, as valuable . accessories and accomplishments, before marriage, in order to insure that weed of happiness, which it is universally claimed, pertains to - that relation, after wards. It may seem astoniehing that any human being could, or would, in dulge in a romantic passion for mere "shreds and patches," bat we haveseen men go crazy after an apron or a bonnet, and women , after a whisker or a pair of boots ; and these worthy individuals whose history we have been noting, may have a personification even in our own experience, to a greater or lesser extent, without our being, at first sight, at all conscious that such is, or had ever been, the case with us, or any of those by whom we are surrounded. It is not to be supposed that Mr. Augustus Leander Pliancy, and Miss Laura Amanda Spasm had no other thoughts or- ideas of life, than thoae heretofore named—not at all ; Miss Laura bid pictured in her imagination a romantic little cottage in a rural little valley, with its "Mlles and rosies and sweet blooming posies"—and poetic lit tle chambers, adorned with little boxes and caskets, containing "ever-so-many" tidy little slippers, and gaitets, and booties, and stockings, and corsets, and lacers, and all the "toggery" necessary, in the production of a neat waist and a neat foot. As to Mr. Augustus be had also a fey additional ideas than those concentrated in cravats and cigars ; for; be had pictured to himself a suburban village residence, with a romantic yard and palings in front, and also a comfor table little smoking chamber, with sun dry boxes of cigars, cravats, collars, and dickies, and a large =looking glass to as sist in putting ,them on properly,"l.6--- gather-with a number of other-et ceteras, - so necessary in making up the wardrobe • of a gentleman. But as to a frying-pan, or a wash-tub, or a cradle,—neither par ty, had for a moment entertained a sin gle idea in reference to such represen tative realities:: of every-day life. To them henceforth, was to be opened up a." perpetual Eden ; and all they had to do was to appropriate its unbought pleas ures and its unapproachable tiappinett, without thinking upon the fiat that had -gone forth many centuries' 'qgo,. that" -man should "eat bread by'the sweat of his brow." It -really seemed a pity that • such a romantic spell should be ruth lessly broken by the sterner facts of life ; but such is the experience of all the aimless and objectless beings ) who form the great majority of mankind—at least such was the experience of this hero and- of this.,:essay. .They wooed. and won each . other—made a ro mantic- wedding , arty incited their nhmerons friends-:=Made merry and were" ,married. ` '• " The parson's "jock" was over Each one had kisied the bride, And wished the Yiiiing folks "happiness," And danced and laughed and cried, The last kiss had been , given, The lait woid had been said; This haPpy pair then "simmered down" - And sonchtAtie bridal bed.