The Mariettian. (Marietta [Pa.]) 1861-18??, September 19, 1863, Image 1

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    BY FRED'K L. BAKER.
Not Illtmbolft.
I Highly Concentrated Vegetable Extract.
A PURE TONIC.
DR. HOOFLAND'S GERMAN BITTERS
PREPARED BY DR, C. M. JACKSON, PIIIL'A, PA.
WI L L effectually cure Liver Complaint,
Dyspepsia, Jaundice, chronic or nervous
Debility, diseases of the Kidneys, and bad dis
eases arising from a disordered Liver or Stom
ach. Such as Constipation, inward Piles, fel
ness or blood to the bead, acidity of the Stom
ach, Nausea, Heartburn, disgust for food, ful-
ness or weight in the stomach, sour Eructations,
sinking or fluttering at the pit of tne Stomach,
swimming of the Head, hurried and difficult
Breathing, fluttering at the Heart. choking or
suffocating sensations when in a lying posture,
dimness of Vision, dots or webs before the
Sight, fever and dull pain in the Head, defi
ciency of Perspiration, yellowness of the Skin
and Eyes pain in the Side, Back, Chest, Limbs,
&c., sudden flushes of Heat,
burning in the
Flesh, constant imaginings of Evil, and grief,
depression of Spirits. And will positively
prevent Yellow Fever, Billions Fever Sm.—
They contain no Alchohol or bad Wnisky.—
They wxLL CURE the above diseases in ninety
nine cases out of a hundred.
The proprietors have thousands of letters
from the most;eminent Clergymen. Lawyers,
Physicians, and Citizens, testifying of their
own pers..nal' knowledge, to the beneficial ef
fects and medical virtues of these Bitters.
Do you want something to strengthen you ?
Do you want a good appeCte ? Do you want
to build up your constitution? Do you want
to feel well? Do you want to get rid of Ner
voutineas Do you want energy? Do you
want to sleep well Do you want a brisk and
vigorous feeling? If you do, use HOOFLAND'S
German Bitters.
PARTICULAR NOTICE.—There are many
preparations sold under the name of Bitters,
put up in quart bottles, compounded of the
cheapest whisky or cenunon iutn, costing from
20 to 90 cents per gallon, the taste disguised by
Anise or Coriander Seed.
. This class of Bitters has caused and will con
tinue to cause, as long as they can be sold,
hundreds to die the death of the drunkard.—
By their use the system is kept continually
under the influence of alchoholic stimulants of
the worst kind, the desire for liquor is created
and kept up, and the result is all the horrors
attendant upon a drunkard's life and death.
For those who desire and will-have a Liquor.
Bitters, we publish the following receipt Get
one bottle of iloofland's Bitters and miX with
three quarts of good brandy or whisky, and
the result will be a preparation that will far
excel in medicinal virtues and true excellence
any of the numerous Liquor Bitters in the
Market, and will cost much less. You: will
have all the virtues of Hoodand's Bitters in
connection with a good article of liquor, at a
much less price than these inferior prepara
tions will cost you.
ATTENTION SOLDIERS I We call the atten
tion of all having relations or friends in the
army to the fact that illloolland's German
Bitters" will cure nine-tenths of the diseases
induced by exposures and privations incident
to camp life. In the lists, published utmost
daily in the newspapers, on the arrival of the
sick, it will be noticed that a very large pro
portion are suffering from debility. Every
case of that kind can no readily cured by
Hoofland's German Bitters. Diseases result
ing from disorders of the digestive organs are
speedily removed. We have no hesitation in
stating that, if these Bitters were freely used
among our soldiers, hundreds of lives might
be saved that otherwise will be lost.
We tall the particular attention to the fol
lowing remarkable and well authenticate,
cure of one of the nation's heroes, whose life
to use his language, "has been saved by the
Bitters :"
PHILADELPHIA, August 23d, 1862
Messrs. Jones rf Eveans.— Well, gentleman,
your Hoofland's German Bitters have saved my
life. There is no mistake in this. his vouch
ed for by nein hers of my comrades some of
whose names are appended, and whoi are fully
cognizant of all the circumstances army case.
I am, and have been fur the last four years,
a member of Sheanun's celebrated buttery,
and under the immediate command of Cap
tain R. B. Ayres. Through the exposure at
dant upon my arduous duties, I was attack
ed in November last with influmation of the
lungs, and was fur seventy-two days in the
hospital. This was followed by great debility,
heightened by an attack of dyseirtary. I was
then removed from the White Blouse, and
sent to this city on board the Steamer "State
of Maine," from which . I landed on the 2Sth,
of June. Since that time 1 have been about
us low as any one could and still retain a
spark of vitality. For a wtek or more I was
scarcely able to swallow anything, and if I did
force a iIIOYSSI down, it was immediately
thrown up again.
I could not even keep a glass of water on
my stomach. Life could not lust under these
circumstances: and, accordingly, tile physi
cians who had been working faithfully, though
unsuccessfully to rescue me from the grasp
of the dread Archer, frankly told me they
could do no more for me; and advised me to
see a clergyman, and to make such disposi
tion of my limitei funds as best suited me.—
An acquaintance who visited me at the hospi
tal, Mr. Frederick SteinDron, of Sixth below
Arch street, advised me, as a forlorn hope, to
try y our Bitters, and kindly pretured a bottle.
From the time commenced takinonem the
gloomy shado 0 of deathreceded, and I am
how, thank Gad for it, getting bettor. Tho'
I have taken but two bottles, I have gained
ten pounds, and I feel sanguine of being per
mitted to rejoin my wife and daughter, from
whom j have heard nothing for ei.,qhteell
months: for, gentlemen, I am a loyal Virgin
ian, from the vicinity of Front Royal. To
your invaluable Bitters I owe the certainty of
life which has taken the plueo of 'vague fears
—to your Bitters owe the glourious pri
vilege
of again claiping to my bosom those
who are dearest to me in life.
Very truly yours, ISAAC MALONE.
We fully concur in the truth of the above
statement, as we had despaired of seeing our
comrade, Mr. Malone, restored to health.
Cuddlebackc, Ist New York Battery.
GeorBe A. Ackley, Co. C., 11th Maine.
Lewis Chevalier, 9241 New York.
I. E. spencer, Ist Artillery, Battery F.
J. B. Fasewell, Co. B, 3d Vermont.
Henry B. Serome, Co. B. do.
Henry T. Macdonald, Co. C. 6th Maine.
John F. Ward, Co. E. sth Maine.
Nathaniel - B. Thomas, Co. F., 95th Penn
. .
John Jenkins, Co. B. 106th Penn.
Beware of counterfeits ! See that the sig-.
nature of Jackson," is on the wrapper
of each bottle. Price per bottle 75 cents, or
half dozen for e 4.00.
Should your nearest druggist not have the
article, do not beilut olt by any of the intoxi
cating preparations that may be offered in its
place, but send , to us, and we will forward,
securely packed, by express.
P rincipal Office and Manufactory,
No. 631 ARCH STREET.
JONES
~& EVANS,
(Successors to C. M. Jackson &
Proprzetors.
, opsale by,.Druggista and Dealers in
evyty town in the United States.
4/it VI ar t to-A
tube to vtunsibuia gournal : gam to volitits, Yittraturt, a g riculturt, Ettus tie ging, linal 4nttilignct,
alarittlian
IS PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY, AT
u: ttc 3111allat it—vax ; Vaaatit in Obi=
o pp reE: CRULL'S Row. Front Street, five
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A liberal deduction made to yearly and half
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Having recentled added a large lot of new
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CARD PRINTING, from the smallest
Card to the largest Poster, at prices to suit the
War times.
Are they truly dying,
All the summer leaves?
Will the blasts of autumn
Strip the happy trees ?
Bright the glowing foliage
Paints the misty air—
Crimson, purple, golden—
Must they die—so fair?
Where has down the snnshine
Wooed them to their birth,
Tempting them to flutter
Far above the earth
Ruthless did it leave them
In their hour of bioem,
Let the chill blasts whisper
Tales of death and doom !
Rapidly they robed them,
In each varied hue,
Hoping thus the sunshine
To attract annw ;
But the tickle glitter
Looked in anger down,
Freezing up the life pulse
With an icy frown.
Thar the happy radiance
Sinks to rise no more;
Leave;s of gold and crimson
Strew earth's gloomy floor.
Gone their summer glory,
Lifeless, lost, they He ;
Wilted, withered, drifting
As winds will, they fly.
Thus in woman's bosom
Love wakes bud and bloom,
'heath his glowing sunshine,
Thinking not of doom ;
Covering soft life's desert
Spread the branches green,
Hope's bright birds sing thro' them
-Close the leafy screen.
Through the quivering foliage
Valls a sudden fear!
Leaves are rustling, trembling—
Feel change drawing near!
Brighter then they robe them,
Call on every hue,
Color every fibre—
Love to win anew.
Summon gold and crimson,
Bright as dyed In blood ;
Hectic fever flushes
Pour in anguished flood !
Gone the heathful quiet
Of the summer green ;
Hope-birds turn to ravens,
Sighs the leafy screen.
Love looks down in anger
On the wildering show;
Freezing follows ehange-frolt—
Love heaps ice and snow !
Then the fevered radiance ••„,
Fade's from life's doomed trek;
Wilted, withered, drifting,
Dud, bloom, leaves we, see.
Love loeks down upon them,
Wanders how it coma—
Thinks through all his &zinging i
They should bloom the atrial'
Did not know his change-froatt
Had the power to kill _
Did not dream his frowning
Life's guidk pulse could still!
Gone the fickle sunshine!
Gone the rosy hours;
Gone love's early wooing!
Gone the, healthful powers
Come and cool the hectic,
Chill the fevered glow,
Pale the crimson flushing,
Death, beneath thy snow
WIFE AND HUSBAND ALPHABETICALLY.
—A wife should be amiable, benevolent,
charitable, domestic, economical, for
giving, geoerous, honest, industrious,
judicious, kind, loving, modest, pleasant,
quiet, reflecting, sober, tender, urbaug)
virtuous; wise, sensplary, yielding and
zealous.
A husband should be likewise ; but,
says an old maid contribittor, a good
mall of thein, alphabetically and uni
formly, are absurd., base; captious, de
praved, exasperating, false, gloomy, hea
thebish, ignorant, jealous;' knappisli,
lazy, mean,- nagligent,obdurate,
pr i
gate, quarrelsome, rash, selfish, taotal\
izing, ugly,. vexing, whimsical, xerba,
ting, yawning, and so forth.
AUTUNIii LEAVES.
MARIETTA, PA., SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 1863.
For The Mariettian.
BEFORE AND AFTER; or, Five Phases of
Married Life,
By Grantellus
CHAPTER
[A ROMANTIC PHASE—Before:l
She stood beside the alter, •
wreath of orange buds
Upon her hair—upon her back
"The richest kind of duds."
Her lover stood beside her
Witli "kidi and dickey" clean,
The last was aged twenty-one,
The first was seventeen.
Many people in this world—perhaps
thoughtless people—take only a sort of
holiday view of life and its attendant
duties ; in fact, they think very, little at
all, of its duties and its realities ; for,
they seem to imagine all things were
made ready to their hand by a species
of spontaneous production and repro
duction, and that consequently, all they
have to do is to appropriate and enjoy
its bounties and its blessings, without
regard to their intentions, their ability,
.or their willirigness;to contribute their
share to the general stock of mental and
material comforts that are in storeor
and that may be obtained by a cheerful
exercise of the proper energies, by every
member of the human family. These
kind of people seem to have no idea of
the fact that all things, both in nature
and art, are •the results of incessant la
bors and tireless effort; and although
they may hare had the examples of in
dustrious projenitors before them, and
may' themselves have labored from ne
cessity just sufficiently to have furnished
themselves with a superficial education,
and to have provided themselves with a
scanty yet tawdry wardrobe, and per
haps through these means have been
enabled to obtain temporarily a situa
tion of comparative ease and indolence ;
yet, forgetting, or never having knoWn,
that true-prosperity depends upon per
petual production and - reproduction,
connected with judicious systems of
barter or eichange, they set themselves
up as mere consumers; and as if they
had never occupied any other position
in society, they manifest an ill-disguised
contempt for those who prefer to lead
an honest life of industry and usefulness,
and who have a just regard for the wel
fare of the community at large. It
would be well, perhaps, if we could al
ways look at the bright side of things,
and reflect that God has made this
world of ours for us to enjoy and be
happy in ; bat it would be also well, and
perhaps better, if we could reflect, and
look beneath the surface of things, and
observe some of the processes, the
modes, and the means employed in the
transformation of substances from one
condition to that of another, and of the
labor necessary to accomplish such re
sults in nature. But without enumera
ting any of the general process of na
ture, in perfecting her various substan
ces and productions, there is a fast
amount of labor required in the field of
art, before the crude ores of the earth,,
the raw hides of animals, and the "full
grown corn in the ear," can be convert
ed into substantial and beautiful imple
ments of ornament and use ; or the
shoes and gloves we wear ; or the bread
and its modifications and compounds,
we eat.
Among all the thoughtless beings on.
this score, perhaps there could not have
been any two selected, that are better
calculated to illustrate this phase of our
primary subject, than the two here in
troduced. Mister Augustus Leander
Pliancy and Miss Laura Amanda Spasm,
were a pair of individuals who in an
eminent degree took this romantic and
impractical view of life— a life of no
"every-days" or working days, but on the
contrary, all "holidays" and sunny•days.
Neither of these worthy individuals
seemed to dream that life had any du-
ties or realities, other than those imme
diately present and connected with their
personal , gratifications, and therefore
they, never for a single moment permit
ted any other than these to enter their
minds, or to form an integral part of
their-- catalogue of sensuous delights ;
nor did they entertain a thought about
making the least possible- provision,
mentally or materitlly, for any , of, the
contingencies, which the stubborn faces
of life, are sure in time to develop,—
They actually knew but little, and
having no appreciation of the proverb,
that, "A little learning is a dangerous
thing," they therefore contrived to ob
tain just enough of that essential ingre
dient to a life of.usefulness and proficien
cy, as was necessary in giving them the
thinnest- - possible external polish, in or
der that they might effectually deceive .
each other. They were doubtless both
°nest and well-meaning in a worldly
sense; and may hive thought it perfect,
ly in accordance with the principles of
"right of justice and of humanity," to
practice those little coquettish arts and
ruses that are so common in even what
is termed the "best society," and from
whence they are reflected in diverging
radii, in various forms. permeating thro'
all the veins and arteries of the different
intermediate grades, until they reach
the very worst, below. Neither Angus
..
tus nor Laura were the offspring of an
opulent parentage, nor yet did they be
long to the sans culottes, but on the
contrary they were of that middling
class—or a peculiar grade of it—usually
denominated the "well-to-do" in the
world. That they had been spoiled in
"bringing up," by over-indulgent and il
litterate parents, will be strikingly mani
fest in the sequel of their histories, and
also from the characteristic shiftless, aim
less, and indolent life which they had re
spectively fallen into, and seemed unable
to shake off. "Gnss, '7as he was familiarly
called by his special cronies, was an
adept in one or two things, and so far
did he transcend others in these respects
that he became a.remarkable Character .
He could "fix up" and wear a "dickey"
and cravat, with any other man in the
village of Catgut ; and if the cravat is
the great fundamental centre of the
man—as is so ably claimed for it—and
if all else, both mental and material, that
inures to him as a living organization,
is but subsidiary to that centre, then
Mr. Augustus Leander Phancy was the
ne plus ultra of a finished gentleman.--
But as if to still farther enhance his ex
traordinary qualities, he possessed an
other peculiar ability—an ability which
many envied himand that was the
exquisite and graceful manner in which
he could—with a superbly gloved hand
—select, hold, fight, puff, remove from
between his lips, knock off the ashes, and
then return it again, a cigar, no matter
as to its quality, from a dime Habanero
down to an insignificant "penny-a grab
er," It may well be imagined that such
an individuality would naturally be the
admired of all the ladies of the village,
(especially the superficial and the flip
pant), as well as the envy of all the
gentlemen, (particularly the eeriness and
the brainless) ; and that Catgut wag
distingushed by such au august presence.
If it be alleged as a contradiction in
terms, and the essence of terms, that
such romantic people could, from choice,
be the inhabitants of a village of such a
commonplace name as Catgut, we will
request the reader to reflect but a single
moment, and if the inevitable conclusion
is not, that Catgut is not only an un
common name—although perhaps in
some measure destitute of that euphon
eous,jingle so pleasing to cultivated ears
—but that all its associations are of the
most romantic and poetic character,
then he or she is no judge of romance
or poetry. Are not the chordS of the
violin and violincello, the guitar, the
lute and the banjo, as well as the snares
of "Le petit tambour," made of .catgut!
Are not these the romantic instruments,
which more romantic swains employ in
serenading still more romantic maidens,
on most romantic evenings, in the utmost
romantic seasons of the year ? And
then the caterwaulings of the animal it
self,—from whose dried and twisted in
testinal canals, the name is derived,—do
they not take place at the romantic
hours of the night, and under the shad
dows of romantic trees, towers, and
chilnneys, on the lawns or the house
tops? Undoubtedly so—incontroverta
bly so.
Miss "Lolly,"—as her friends most
affectionately, and most effeminently
styled her—when the intercourse be
tween them was of the most harmonious -
nature—had also her peculiar virtues as
well as Mr. Guss, and these were chiefly
a pretty foot and ankle, and a most
magnificent wasp-like waist; when she
was properly stayed, laced and "rigged ;'
and these combined, were instrumental
in captivating the too suscePtable heart
of Mr. Augustus, although , they never
could hide her aqualine nose, from more
penetrating and less interested observes.
Now there was something exceedingly
incongruous and contradictory in the
form and' contour of Miss Laura, and
the harmony of its most striking parts.
Her nose *and hands seemed to belong
to somebody else, but her waist was de
cidedly,neat ; and her feet and ankles
exquisitely turned , and trim, and she
well knew this, and "Guas" knew it, and
they jointly and severally by fulsome
praise and sundry , Manipulations on their
parts, contrived to let , all the village of,
Catgut and die surrounding country also
know it. Notwithstanding the great
diversity between the leading traits of ,
chikracierfko--this worthy but luckleSe
pair, a sort of affection grew up between
them—an affection, however, grounded
no deeper than in a transient personal
admiration—for if they had been the
greatest enemies on earth, they could
have adopted no more effective plan for
the development of that enmity, than
the very -course they were, seemingly,
so unconsciously pursuing. Each had
an exceedingly vulnerable spot in their
mental gourds, and each assailed that
weak spot until it was fairly battered
through, and then amidst the smoke and
din of a double victory and capitulation,
they incontinently, yoked themselves to
gether in an uncongenial bond that never
should have been consummated under
Such circudiatances at all. Guss liked
above all things in this world, a pretty
foot and ankle and a neat waist, without
for a-moment thinking about his likes
for the individual to whom they belong
ed ; and Lolly admired in a supreme
sense, a tidy eickey and cravat, npon a
graceful puffer of -the noxious weed,
without thinking of the nauseous quali
ties that might lay -concealed beneath
them, and therefore in enhancing and
admiring these respective superficial and
questionable qualities, all of the real
and substantial virtues that may and
ought to enter into the composition of
the human heart, were entirely over
looked, or unceremoniously set aside...,
On the one hand was presented the lu
dicrous, but by no means rare, spectacle
of a man,—or at least a being bearing
the material form of a man—coquetting
and offering homage to a woman's foot
and waist ; and on the other hand a we
man—or one who manifested the physi
cal outline of a woman—ogling, sighing
for, and blindly paying court to a Wunch
of muslin and a weeds, manufactured in
to a dickey and a cigar. Mistaken mor
tals—blind and infatuated Mr. Augustus
Leander Phancy—silly and peurile Miss
Laura Amanda Spasm—you are not
alone in this world, and if your- course
has not been all "sugar and honey" in
this life, you have the consolation-4f
such knowledge be a consolation—of
knowing that you are traveling is a
large caravan, over the deserts of time.
It is not to be implied that all roman
tic thoughts and ideas in any of the re
lations of life are to be abjured, and that
mankind are to come down to the, reali
zation of plain, cold and stubborn facts
only. These fatigue and oppress, and
convert human beings into mere dull
moving machines, when there is no re
lief from their exercise and control.—
Every cultivated human mind ,has an
appreciation of the poetry and romance
of life, and delights in romantic scenes
and reflections ; and even amid the
sterner duties of tlni day, will revert
to them as a seasoning and a relief to
the monotonous routine of other occu
pations. Indeed the highest exempli6-
cation of romance and poetry will doubt
less be found in those Elysian fields be
yond the shores of time, "where pleasure
never dies ;"-and therefore as a prepa
ration for the enjoyment of that elysiutn,
it may be proper to cultivate the true
romantic and poetic sentiment here.—
Therefore, in reciting the history of the
"wooing and winning" of Mr. Phancy
and Miss Spasm, we do not intend to
speak disparagingly of the romantic
phase of marriage and married life, but
only to hold up to disapproval and dis
couragement a romantic phase—a phase
which we consider borders very strongly
on the ridiculous, if not on the insane.
Indeed a distinguished authority has as
serted that, "there is only o ne step
from the sublime to the ridiculous,". and
we are not sure that the worthy pair
whose peculiar history we are discussing,.
have not taken that step. At all events;
instead of cultivating a love . for the uses
and duties of life as their substantial
meat and drink, and- seasoning tltese
with the romantic and the poetic, 'they
abjured ,the former nearly altogether, or
made only so much use of them as ne
cessity-compelled them, in order to ren
der their romantic and poetic.pabulum
digestable. In this, as we have before
hinted, they were not alone, bpt on, the,
contrary were traveling along with a
large company of impracticals, which
may be found at any period and place
along the path of time. These are
probably not so much the objects of
censure or contempt, as they are of pity,
for these thing's are-as often the -result
of - false systems of education -and of
moral training, as they are of the perver
sity of the human -heart. False tastes,
false readings; false meiles of thought
arrd of-dress ; among the high boil--:or
those .whiyclalin to be ect--idescena
fatal mantles, and tvi4,, more or, less, ,
cover all below them, no matter bow
much., thew
. may, e Tea.- to resipt
+
VOL. 10.--NO. 7.
There are ages, and other circumstances
too, at which, and under which, it may be
more proper to indulge in the romantic and
poetic sentiment, than at other ages and
under other circumstances. A merely
romantic octogenerian, is an object that
is more apt to excite' the ridicule of
their fellow beings, than one whose suit
mers have not yet reached a score ; and
yet, a legitimate exercise and indulgence
of the true romantic sentiment, in eau
the aged and infirm, is not foxbidden,
and may conduce to a useful erid. But
it must be evident to the reader that it
was a perverted or morbid condition of
the romantic arid poetic `sentiment that
governed thiminds andthe salons, of
Mr. Augustus Leander Phaney: iiiid
Miss Laura Amanda Spasm ; for, in
stead of looking forwarclto the realities
Of life as potent and inevitable—dentin
gencies that must be encountered:int
provided for, these realities were regard
ed as myths, or were entirely ignored,
or if at all contemplated; they. were dis
cussed and viewed - from 'an impractical
standpoint. If this phase 'of reliance
bad no counterpart in the crinduct of
the young and the thoughtless, anterior
to marriage, in the present state of so
ciety, then it would be altogether un
worthy to indulge in a criticism that
only desired to create a phantom, in
order that it might gratify the morbid
delight of dissipating it; but it has a
fearful counterpart, in a multitude of
cases, differing only in intensity, in de
gree, and in modes of manifestation and
development. If individual welfare—
present and future—was dependentlor
anything that is of value to either the
body or the soul, upon the cultivation of
a small waist'or a neat foot and ankle,
in a woman, or a 'starched collar, a dick
ey and a cravat, in a inan, then it would
become a bounden duty in the sexei to
cultivate and acquire , these, as valuable .
accessories and accomplishments, before
marriage, in order to insure that weed
of happiness, which it is universally
claimed, pertains to - that relation, after
wards. It may seem astoniehing that
any human being could, or would, in
dulge in a romantic passion for mere
"shreds and patches," bat we haveseen
men go crazy after an apron or a bonnet,
and women , after a whisker or a pair of
boots ; and these worthy individuals
whose history we have been noting, may
have a personification even in our own
experience, to a greater or lesser extent,
without our being, at first sight, at all
conscious that such is, or had ever been,
the case with us, or any of those by
whom we are surrounded.
It is not to be supposed that Mr.
Augustus Leander Pliancy, and Miss
Laura Amanda Spasm had no other
thoughts or- ideas of life, than thoae
heretofore named—not at all ; Miss
Laura bid pictured in her imagination
a romantic little cottage in a rural little
valley, with its "Mlles and rosies and
sweet blooming posies"—and poetic lit
tle chambers, adorned with little boxes
and caskets, containing "ever-so-many"
tidy little slippers, and gaitets, and
booties, and stockings, and corsets, and
lacers, and all the "toggery" necessary,
in the production of a neat waist and a
neat foot. As to Mr. Augustus be had
also a fey additional ideas than those
concentrated in cravats and cigars ; for;
be had pictured to himself a suburban
village residence, with a romantic yard
and palings in front, and also a comfor
table little smoking chamber, with sun
dry boxes of cigars, cravats, collars, and
dickies, and a large =looking glass to as
sist in putting ,them on properly,"l.6---
gather-with a number of other-et ceteras, -
so necessary in making up the wardrobe •
of a gentleman. But as to a frying-pan,
or a wash-tub, or a cradle,—neither par
ty, had for a moment entertained a sin
gle idea in reference to such represen
tative realities:: of every-day life. To
them henceforth, was to be opened up a."
perpetual Eden ; and all they had to do
was to appropriate its unbought pleas
ures and its unapproachable tiappinett,
without thinking upon the fiat that had
-gone forth many centuries' 'qgo,. that"
-man should "eat bread by'the sweat of
his brow." It -really seemed a pity that •
such a romantic spell should be ruth
lessly broken by the sterner facts of
life ; but such is the experience of all
the aimless and objectless beings ) who
form the great majority of mankind—at
least such was the experience of this
hero and- of this.,:essay. .They
wooed. and won each . other—made a ro
mantic- wedding , arty incited their
nhmerons friends-:=Made merry and were"
,married. ` '•
" The parson's "jock" was over
Each one had kisied the bride,
And wished the Yiiiing folks "happiness,"
And danced and laughed and cried,
The last kiss had been , given,
The lait woid had been said;
This haPpy pair then "simmered down"
- And sonchtAtie bridal bed.