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I OLUMII, XXII.
Y CV U
BOOFLAND'S GERMAN BITTERS,
HOORAH'S GERMAN THIC,
Prepared by Dr. 0. M. Jackson, PMladelphtst -
Their Introduction Into ads country from Germany
Occurred in
IsQ'
THEY CURED YOUR.
FATHERS AND MOTHErS,
And will cure yon and your children. They ere
3E siI I
entirely different from the many
preparations now in the country
called Bitters or Tonics. They are
no tavern prepa re' ion. or anything
tike one; but good, honest, reliable medicines. They
ere
The greatest known r etried * for
Liver Complaint.
DY.SPEPSIk
Nervone Debility,
J'A.UN ppm,
Diseases of the Kidneys.
ERUPTIONS OF 114 E SKIN,
and all Dlf4efuteg arlalnx from a Moor.
dered Liver, Stomach, or
IMPURITY OF TIIB BLOOD.
Constipation, Flatulence, Inward Fibs.
Fullness of Blood to the Head, Acidity
of the Stomach, Nausea, Heart.
burn, Die-cast for Food. T'ifiness
or Weight in the Stomach.
Sour Eructations. Sink
ing or Flattering at the,
• t_of_the_Stomactf,Swint.
ming of te'e Head, Harried or
Difficult Breathing., Fluttering
Co
... n ._, at the Heart, Choking or
•"113itifooat-i-ag Sensations
when in a Ly- I. n , f Posture.
Dimness of Vision, Dots
or Webs before the Sight, Dull
Pain• in fife Head, Deficiency
of Perspiration, Yellowness
of the Skin and Eyes.
Pain in the Side.
• Back, Chest, Limbs; e tc..
Sudden Flushes of Heat, Burn
ing in the Flesh, Conet int Imaginings_ -
of Evil and Great Depression of Spirita,
All these indicate disease of the Liver or Digestive
Organs, combined with impure blood.
Hoofland's German Bitters
is entirely vegetable, and contains no
liquor. It Is a compound. of Fluid Et.
• • tra.-ts. The Roots, Herbs, and Barks
from which these extracts are made
C)
are gathered i n Germany.'
All the ra ted
from virtues --
- are extracted from them b
a_sc_l_e_nllll-c._ ---ellemi . me 1
extracts are then forwarded to this
country to be used expressly for the
manufacture of these Bitters. There is
no alcohol lc substance of any kind.used
_ha compounding the Bitters,hence it is
the only Bitters that can be used 3.a
- _ - _ -- -cases where-alcoholic -stimulants - aro - •
-not-advisable. _
goofland's_German -Tonic
ID a combination of all the ingredients of the Bitters,
with pons Santa Crass Ruin, Orange, etc. It is used
for the same diseases as the Bitters, in cases whore same
pure alcoholic. stimulus is required. You will boar in
;wand that these remedies are entirely different from
any others advertised for the cure of the diseases named,
o those being scientific preparations of medicinal extracts,
white the others are mere decoctions of rum in some
form. The TONIC is decidedly one of the most plea.
Sant and agreeable remedies ever offered to the
_public.
Its taste it exquisite It is a pleasure to take it, whits its
life-giving, exhilarating, and medicinal qualities have
Wind it to be known as the great eat tonics.
DEBLLITY. .
. Pere h MO nieniefne canal In Meng ir s igrerMeak
Enters or Tonic -in•iser of Debility,
Fli
.tad impart a tone e - ad vigor 1 o the whore
system, strengthen the appetite, cause
an enjoyment gf the fond, enahre the s'o
Mach to digest it, purl] y the Maud, give a goad. so u nd,
healthy complexion, eradicate the yellow tinge from the
eye, impart a bloom to the cheeks, aml clutage the patient
from a shirri•breathrel, emaciated, asbak, and neresur
inratid. to a full-Jared, emu, and vitrvotes persmt.
Weak and Delicate Children are
made strong', by using; the illitters or
Tonic. In tact, they are Family Medi-.
clues. They can be administered whit
perfect attrety to a child three months
old, the most delicate temale, or a man
of ninety. •
These Remedies are the best
Blood Purifiers -
ever knoumv, mid will erne, all diseage.s resulting from
L a
bad blood Keep you, blood pure; le , ep your
Liver in order : keep ymir digestive organs
in a sound, healthy eoncittinn. by Ihe use
Of these rented wo and no disease wilt
erer area if port. The bes , men v n ate country recommend
them. If -years of honest reputation g o far anytloay
you must try those preparations.
MOM. lIOS. GEO. W. WOODWARD,
ChiefJustico of the Supreme Court of Pronßylvanta.
Pin LADULPIIIA, March 113. 1867.
!Snit " Hoofland's German Ili 'zees'' ,s not an nalox•
tenting berry', ge, but is a good tonic, u• Jul in disnrders
clt the digesizre mgana, and of great In•nefil in cases of
ekbiliele and want of nervous action, in the system
Yours truly.
• .
FROM HON. JAMES TMOMPSON,
Judge of the Supreme Court of Pennstlvanh.
Pm LADIMPIII•, Arrh 28. 18118.
.A ...
I con Rider 6 , ifitooliantro
Gorman flit tent 99 a ratuable
medionc In ease of attacks of
In digestion or Dyspep , in.
I can certify thistrom my experience 01
It. 'Yount. with respect,
JAMES 'IIII.I6IIIPSON.
PROM REV. JOSEPfI 7). KENNARD, D. D.,
Pastor of the Tenth Baptist Church, Philadelphia.
Da. JACKSON—DEAR 13111.1-1 hoer been frequently
requested to connect my name milh reearnmendattons of
((if/trent kinds of medicines, but regarding the practice
as out of my appropriate rph , rea have in all cases de
dined; but with a clear proof in various instances, and
particularly in my own family, of the usefulness of Ur.
Holland's German Bitters, I depart for mice from say
usual course, to express my full conviction Mat for gile.
eral debility of the system and 4.llmi:illy for Liver ,
114 T
Complaint, it la a safe and valua , le
-preparation. —TO sante eases it may
fail; but loreany„ I doubt not, ii will
Ite wry beneficial to those who surfer
from the shave causes. Yours, very respect/Win,
J. H. ICES.V AUG,
Eighth, Lana CaLtes serest.
. .
CAUTION
.froofTaturs German Remedies are counterfeited. Tho
genuine &nue the signature of C. NI. Jackson on
the front of the outside %Dropper of each _bottle, anti the
name of the article blown in each bottle. AU Wien ars
counterfeit.
Price of the Intteen, $1 00 per bottle;
Or, a halt - dozen fur risii -00.
Pelee h a l f o Tonle, $5O por bottle;
Or, a dozen for $ 1 50.
The tonic le put up In quart bottles,
Beesi/ece that it is pr. ffoojland's German ReineNes
Mat are so universally usoll and so highly reams.
31D
emended; and do not allow the Druggists
to induce you to lake , inything else that he
way say sujust as goo d, . because A.
wakes a tarprprojit on th These Revue ,
uses will be sent by cypress to any locality upon apptint.
ton to the
PRINCIPAL OFFICE,
ALT`THE GERMAN MEDICINE STORE,
No. 631 ARCH STREET, Philadelphia.
WAS M. EV All 3, .
... . .
- . •
. Proprietor r
Formerly C. N. JACKSON & CO.
These -Remedies - are for sale by Drags
sists,Storekeepers, and Medlelneldeale
-ra everywhere.
. Do not-forget 81 , examine wit 1768 article yea boa ail
enter 88 pd the grauitas. •
soil 25-'6B.
ALL
dEO. W. WOODWARD.
WA)YES,BORQ';,_ fig, A,N,p4lN:gou,NT_LigNiviiiy,
=M:=MEI
rwcs3Erwra.,elLxJ..
7DV, GIRL WITH THE CALICO DRESS.
A fig for your upper-ten girls,
With their velvets and satins and laces,
Their diamonds and' rubies and pearls,
And their milliner figure and faces;„
They 'may shine at a party or ball,
Embl vineil,with half they pissens;
But give me, in place of them all, •
My girl with 'the calico ilres9.
She is plump as a partrilge, and fair
As the rose.in ifs earliest bloom; ,
Her beth will with ivory compare,
And her breath with the clover perfume;
Her step is as free and as
As the fawns whom the, hunters hard press
And h-r eye is as soft and as bright—,
My girl with the mien ?mos.
S'ie is eheerful, warm hearted and true,
And is kind to her fattril arid mother;
She studies how much she can do
For her sweet little sister and brother;
If you want a companion (or lire, '
To comrort. enliven and bless.
She is just the right tern as wife—
My gill with the chlien tivss.
% oualiwtt.
By MARY DELL
Our own ! What can we call our own,
The flower we cull to
The bird, whose song we love so well,
Pass soon from us away.
The heart whose friendship most we prise,
We cannot call our own--
Change o'er the heart doth quickly pass,
--Andiriondship all is flown.
Our youth be longeth hut to time,
Who stea s it soon away,'
And leaves instead the wrinkled brow,
An oc. e o sr yer gray
What is our own? Ah, naught of earth,
-Our-life,-our_yout h, ourjoy—
Tir! flowers that bloom around our path,
Earth's care and blight destroy.
But there is something naught can steal,
lf welcomed to our heart—
No ch .nging Ones, and shifting scenes,
Can cause it to depart.
Immortal Truth. we here with us '
May if we but try,
And make it ours to•sh..re our time,
And immortality.
JOSH BILLINGS PAPERS .
LODS'I ER ISLAND
A slavdor iz like a hornet o if yu kant kill
it dead the rust blo, yu better not strike at
it.
Politeness iz a shrewd way folks baz ov
Elm ter i pg.; thernselfs
I wake this •thstinkshun between char
aktrr and rrpulashun—reputaqhun iz what
the work: thinks' 4,v us, ehatakter iz what
the world Avows no US
What a ruilk,lus farce it iz to be continual.
ly on the hunt f r peace and quiet
Diu wan ever yet increased hiz reputaßhun
hi c‘intvakiiitting
Anxiety alwus sieps•ou itself.
Silence, like darkness, iz genczally safe
There'iz only two things that i kno ov
that a nan'wont brag ov, one iz lieiog and
tuther tz jealousy.
It takes 6ranes to wake a smart man, but
good luck often makes a /among one:
°pi/ivies are like other vegetables, worth
just what they will retell •
I think most men had rather be charged
with malice than making a blunder.
Love cuts up all sorts of monkey •sbines,
it makes a fool sober and a wize wan frisky.
I don't believe in total depravity,. every
man haz sututbing in him to show that God
made him.
I suppose that one rearm whi the 'road
to ruin' iz broad, iz tew aceorust.tdate the
grate amount try travel in that direck, , hun.
I think i had rather hear .a man brag air, ni
himself, than tew near him brag all the tune
ov sum one else—for i think i like vaulty a
leotle better than i do siektotausy.
A humbug iziike a bladder, good for noth
ing till it is blotted ap, and then ain't good
for nothing after it iz pricked.
A bigg nose is sed tew he a sign of genius
-if a Luau's genius lays in biz nose, i would
say the sign wuz a good one.
Vanity iz seldom rualishous.
A womau (like an echo) will have the last
word.
Put an Englisliman into the garden of
.I \4,
Eden, and, he wou find . fault • with the
whole biassted coma o—put a Yankee ia,
and he will see.whare e could alter it to
advantage— put an Irishman io, and he would
want tew boss the thing—put a Duehman
in, and he would proceed at once to plant
cabbage.
When a man is squandering his estate,
even those who are getting it,. call him. a
ghoul.: ,
Neu mourn for what they hay lost—wim
• :• ;. :.
men for what they hain't got.
I jUdge ov a man'aslrte:w entirely ?hi: his
phasionif-: - it' is a grate deal easier tew be a
goad dove than a decent serpent. . .
There aremenny ways to find• out how
honest a - man' may be, but there aint no way.
to find out ' the Went ov i his vanity.
•,. •• • • ;,• • •; 1 - • ',l' \ :‘
Xxxcioz?,rsericl-e•lat we•wospekiaori, to
,
• A lie la like . a oat, it Etexere9,lpeit,4l-yu in
a itr'ai r tihtlitie: - •,-
Natarc iz :
,k,itid inn ghe . '" couldn't
'well I , fford to make ne--:perfekt T and so- ebe
•made„ua.blind, to our failiega. ; , •
,±„.. Smut dy.i6 . f.leart yu,wantotu.:3-fakn _ha
7 2 6a - tart thete:ain'toc-hrtitin , natuf in -a
niiee " ' ' •
Friendshipl2 -piesply 'the 'gallantry of telt •
_ .
interest.,. ,
Boyare Ov the,. ` man ; ; with, the half stilt
eyit4 7—he ailA!d reaming:- .
.Exp0enc.e..m.a.14449 tiloft) timid Dieu th'ao it
duz - -- •
- „
Advice &lir:4 , " "aup
ply alwps e,stipg . 4o thq depaauFl.: , ,
. . .
.Oue ov the safest.and most successful tal
leots i kno ov , iz to.be u, gond
Fools are the whet-staties ov society '
Better Make rt . weak man jimir ciaetny than
your friend.
Curiosit-y . iz the instinct of wisdom.
Those who boeumdisgusled , and withdraw'
from the niu-tn't forgit nne thing,
that the world will tit them, a lung time
before they will tiiruitthe world.
Put man down (Cir we) az a vain and sel
fish critter, all his talk and .ackshuns re • the
contrary ;notwithstanding, nevelikelesa,' to
wit, verily. amen
Vs'ize men Idff every , good chance they
ken suit. Lang is only a weakness in
phools.
I giv the world ere - lilt for a grate deal
more honesty than it can show. •
henever Gd a r3al handaum woman
engaged i v th e 'wimmins' rtf., , hts bizzi
neBB,' then i am going to iak - e my bat under
my arm and jine the procession.
Gratitude is a dikt,_ arTd
debts, iz paid bekauze we are obliged to, not
bekauqe we love to
Praise that ain't deserved iz no better
than slander.
Cheap Pleasures.
• Pid you ever study-the cheapness of some
pleasure ? Do yoe know hew little it takes
to make' a multitude -happy Such trill •s
as a nod, a word or a smile does the work.
A widow lives in the neighborhoed who is
the mother of hall a dozen children, Send
them a peck of sweet apples and they will be
happy. A ohild.bas lost bis arrow—all the
world to him—and he .mourns sadly ; help
-him to find - it or - make - him soother,
quickly will the sunshine play over hiskober
tace. A boy has:done as mueb_as_he_can_do
-to pile up a load of wood; assist him for a
few amateurs, or speak a pleasant word to
him, and be forgets his toil, and works away
without minding it Your apprentice has
broken a mug, or slightly_ injured a piece of
work. Say syou seoundrel4.and be feels tali
citable , Oar remark, •I'ln , r•orry, - . and he will
try to do better. You employ a wan; pay
him eheet I ully,.and speak a pleasant word to
him, and be learies your house with. a con
tented heart. to light...up his . own hearth with
smiles an - dladness. PreaAhre is cheap.
.Who will not hestew libeially f It there
are smiles, sunshine acid flowers, all about
us, let us not grasp them with a miser's fist,
and lock.them up in our hearts. No; rath•
er let us' take them about us, in the tot of
the widow, among the groups of children, iu
the crowded marts where .men. of business
congregate, in our familles,•and ev,erywhere.
We make the wretched happy, the discon.
tented cheerful, the afleted resigned, at an
exceedingly cheap rate. Who will refuse
to do so'?
A TRUE CuitisTlAN.--This story— good
to read in these days of hu , :iness avarice— is
told of Nantucket a generation ago:
It was a very' severe winter,•and the hat%
bar had been frozen tour weeks. The coal
in store had long been exhausted, and there
was'much suffertng from want of fbel Eieb
the fences had been toru•down,and burnt to
keep up the scanty supply .of wood :Co the
great delight of the townspeople the- ice
broke up one fine morning. and a schooner
laden with . coal was seen approaching There
was much excitement, and before the vessel
was moored4 . coal dealer boarded . her and
eagerly addressed the honest Quaker shipper,
Captain Grlfurd, 'Well, Uap'eo,' said ha,
'you've about -hit it this et also: I guess I'll
have to take y'ur hul9.cargo. S'pose you'll
want tnore'n the usual $7 a ton. \Val, I like
to du the squat thing by au old friend, and
I'll give you $l2 a ton for it? 'Friend,'
said Captain Gifford. 'thee can have one ton
at my coal if thee likes at $B, but only one
ton, all must have a chance.' Just then one
of the richest men in the place joined them,
saying 1. Want ten tot's •of your Coal ar
your own price—came it. I have. buffo:A
etiou ,, lt tor :once Ile received the EatUO
answer, and so did all-11121.3 ton fur each fam
ily, and $8 as On price of each ton. .No
love of gain, Da solicitation', •nu regard for
individuals could move honest Captain Git
ford.
A persistent young man r of Hartford, who
was opposed in his inclination to marry the
girl of bis choice by her parents, at last suc
ceeded in winning a reluctant consent, and
tire date of the marriage ceremony was fixed.
After the arrival of the company upon the
happy day appointed, the youngster gratiely
proceeded to addrais the astonished assembly
thusly `We. are much obliged .for this gath•
eriug on our account, butietine suggest that
there is Do necessity for any further busi
ness, as we Were married tbriie weeks ngo
A lady, while out berryingott North Gran
ville, New York, came-upon a corpse with
.the. throat cut , from ear to ear She drop :
, ped her pail.of fruit--cud rushed. for the vi 1.406,,
.406,, who at one repalied• to the seeee to
fiud that the corpse had come to life
and itin 6ff' will thebellies.. Tbe elevei
rogue hakutained•his, neck
,nini . hinatit wit 4
berry juice. •
Goctl ,words fo r the young- 4 dinner's
ready! "
ANIA, - ,_ - 0111DAY
SKIPTEMB
,„ ; • ••
Jur: ir: i r mit;
A Beautiful Incident •
• Soma . .three ur.. four., yeare'- ,ego a,
-young
mattple,namedi Fisk came tuOis pith, (In
cliretrapoTis)-and the' kiiisbrind embarked in
the grileety: trade: hatiing sercirel thilasitid
dollars capital-at-hie-moo mend,'' 'fie hael=sett
13anadit some time ; previously with a,amall
fortune, hat disastrous speculations in the oil
regionis LA diminished • his stook of ready
money, and his business here , proviiie , ,aleo
unprofitable he was forced th Sell out at a
sacrifice,• and found himself left almost pent
lees:
.
At this juncture hin noble.bearted, wife
minis l'orwara, putit - er oven fair shiniaer "to
the wheel, and the twain began the bktelbr
life again with unimpaired eheerfulnesa, and
zealous 'determination Mrs' Fisk .. a'ssutned
much •of the responsibility, and -nondtieted
the business in her own home. • She tented
a store in Miller's Block, bought and sold all
kinds of miscellaneous , goods, pertodienls,
toys in their seaso'n, and'whatever noUld 'be
hontritt low and sold at a good profit. he
made long journeys Ea,t, visited the manic.
facturera, bought. goods 'away down,' and by
• , ell . ing, them, bel qv what was asked by other
dealeis, hiiolt. 'up 'a floulishina"Vacie. as mani
-I.f on readers can testify of thjir.onru knowl ,
edge•
Thus matters wearon until one day about
a week ago during business hoars, and whle
the shop was full of eustomere,_a dove flew
lightly into 'the store 'through the door I r,i7 7
ery one present was astonished and the mire
so because the dove appeared to be rather in
the pursuit of some purpose ,than frightened
and lost. It did not flutter . wildly shoal.;
bet-moved "•enti over the heads of the cus
_ .
touters and the shop people:- till-it- tram- to
Mis lef.-k, when it .perebeci:eonfidingly on
her shoulder, rested for a few moments; turn
log its
,rnild beaming eyes full upon,her_fa . ce,
and then flattered 'out d away as quietly
as it came
Of course many retharks were made eon.;
earning the ineident,.but it had almost been'
forgotten when, next daya letter came : to Mr
and Mrs. from Canada, announcing
that, they had been left a legacy of $15,000
in gold ! _ .
Felling, out. their business here, for which
they received nearly 68,000 'cash,' the light
hearted couple left tat night fur Canada,
followed by the hearty:goo& Will of their
- many friends to this city. To some minds
this little incident may appeai of od Odle
quenee, but others will have pleasdre-inlbe
lieving that the gentle dove indeed brought
a message to the faithful and' true-hearted
wife, although she was not privileged to uo•
derstand it.—Saturday Eucning Mirror.
An Omaha. Goose Elite
,
The Omaha Republicait. tiatiOhe' following
aceount of a 'goose race' that came 'Off! in
this city : .
Over two thousand people gathertid on the
banks above the pond, and along the lower
end of Farnham street, yesterday, to witness
Bob Hart and Sully in their great - Wash-tub
goose feat.. Promptly av-the advertised time,
flirt made •his appearance, followed by his
competitor, for the golden peanut -offered, : by
Colonel "Hanford Each sat in an ordinary
wash 'tub,' to which was attached six pairs of
geeso, driven and guided by an ordinary ear
riagowbip.
The most deafening applause,- shouts and
yells greeted the contestants as they were
Owed into the pond. Striking the Faiiihabi
street bank, both started side by side, talking
and urging on the feathered racers the same
as a jockey would do in a trial ofspeed among
horses. Half way across the pond Sully's
team switched off and bolted for the weeds,
giving Bab the, lead by three , and -a. half
lengths. Recovering his course Sully made
splendid headway, gaining rapidly on
~the
Hart outfit. One of his geetse:hostever, av:
tempting to dive,•kicked a rear goose in 'the
eye. - -
The kicked bird at once cackled, his de
fiance and soon demoralized the entire team
to such an eztent that victory was impossi
ble. Flan would have come in, 0. K. poly
for his' `wheel geese'balki ug badly and ,up ,
setting the tub. Sully began laughing at his
opponent's disaster. when- his- team made. a
sudden right,flink movetnentwwhieh left the
driver in the mud. The.assembled multitude
yellyi the louder at•the accident/4. Righting
their
_crafts,
,both parties made for shore,
leaciing tfieir seams. 13uth took the prize.
While Thad Stevens was a young lawyer,
he - once - bad a - . Cage before 'n biti-teinpersil
judge of au °bionic Pennsylvania Court
Under what he considered a very erroneous
it' was decided aXainst him ; where
upon-Ito - threw dowb his; bdoks and plaited
up his hat in a high state of indig,nation,'Und
was about to leave the court -roots, roMttering,
imprecations all' around him The jaitge
• aigtitened himself to full height; -as
sumed •an air 'of offended majesty; and asked
Thad if he , meant •to express his • contempt
or this Court ?! Thad turned- to him very.
deferentially; medna respectful bow, nod re
plied, in feigned ernizemerit-o.E.cp.rees xpy
contempt for this Court I. No, ror 1 Lam try.
lag to concen/ it, your Hoon;,addiag, as-ho
turned to leave,'hut I find it trashed hard to
du it.'
-A lawyer is a eertaideity;uot remarkable
for •his cleanliness of persou, appeared at
party a while ago with a rose in his button
hole, . .'W.here do you suppose it•eame trom ?'
said he to a brother lawyer who was admir
log it The latter looked up and down the
entire length of the questioner,' and With
great deliberation responded, 'Why, I sup
pose itreir there.' •
Lost —Somewhere between sunrise:and
swage., two golden hours, each-set with. sizes
ty diamond minutes. lio_te;sterd
_isAffered
for they are lost forever.
Ao exchapge_oalle the Grechurbood beak
44M1/1011.
An Adroit'gfAr:
One daY4lg(TlNtuan;9oeCit a6:•theitoro
Rtkio„Utkr,d, , Pan ,
tinder - his tirM,, *He . puriliased a neokq9,,, for
- arid,ittliti"iol4d
-perinissiOn- tOti leave - 1114 Vet ttririlelnkifidit
few errands down town. Old Hardman—it
• dealer , . . ifew- 'and) sebbart'hafid. 41Othing
tuutPP•objeotiort
ie. a 'violin, paid Op!,, gontle9;ja,e,
tpriie - iery thi) t hy j nn
old Italian; who died, at my father's itiiuicr.
I beg go* to be.oareful'of
- Mr. Hardmaopronised,
aed l tto fk
ireer of
the prehion4 ViOldepate
Tewerl noii;'wile th d old'etithined'eafer
was very deeply engaited in SellIni!; - isuiif lbf
shoddy_ for-bang•nr Prusian - Tricot ) ketran
ger !ehteretl =the' Atore-l-a 'ten:tartishly well
dressed man, .with t distingueated looktniEhe
Fiß4p 11 P9°.:4 sh O. if i*P 4 - as
no one was near to prevent , trteng.,w. comer
- lAltriped smiled and :openeci the box, and Oak
oat the instfuritetit— verfdaik itad
ancient lookin4 one. I
, cried flafdrr.an, when be heard
the sowod of th'e' viol; 'Whit fOr
,Yótt "tbuela
•dat, eh ' •••, o'lo
The,atranger explained that he wain, pro:
fessor.—that he was a leader of an orchestra
—and that he could never see a,vielie
out trying it And then he drew the bow
aeress the strings, paying a few' passages of
a fine Rid German waltz. ' ,z
_y_silutiLhe_okiit4_afier he barl_ru ;011:
fingers over thelostriunOot "avihiie; 'that is
the best violin ever esti! •uTtieni's not 'a
beater one in the city—a ,perfeetly gentiine
( lid Cremona I Lwil ._ire:_ •ott_a—kanti
. - .
'
dollars fair it ' . .
Hardman said it was, net his.
.
'l'll give you'albundred:and• fifty I'; Two
hundred!', ~., . . , ,
Hardrpan was forced to explain how
else vtolia cable to he lett in the store. •
Tne stratuer had taken out his pocket
book,• drawn forth .two one hundred dollar
bank notes. He put them back,. remarking:
must have that.violin if money will buy
it. When the owner roams will pit ask
him to wait .for we?. If he eantiot.wait ask
him to meet me,here at six ,o'clock. If., he
Cannot do that, ask him to call at the office
of the Treasurdr of the Academy of Music,
nut inquire tor the- Director-of-the-Orches
tra. Will you do it-?'
Hardman said 'be would.
'But;_suggested_tbe stranger, 'you need
not tell the man what I said about his viol,
nor what I've offered; because he may lave
an idea of what treasure ho possesses.. You
will be careful and circumspect.
The stranger went away, end Halph,ilerd-
Man reflected. In theVourse of an
.hour the
n wnet. of-the violin 'returned, and' a'sked Ter
his ;Ilut the shoddy man baa been esp.
tivated by the goldewbair, t ‘.l.
~117 hat w,ould the gentleman sell his .violin
for?' ,
At firat theigeolein'au would not listen 14 . )
the proposition, but after a deaf Of talk lie
confessed that he.himself was not a Iprofesi•
sot, and could not well afford to keep amb l e
valuable instrument, He would sell . if for
one hundred and seventy-five dollars and
not a penny less, 1
Ralph Hardman paid the money, and be ;
came the legal possessor of the violin, ready
to receive anywhere from throe to five hun
dred dollars , from the director of the orelics
tea, as he might-be able.
Rut ths director did.not come. At the end
of a, week' flardnian carried the violin to a
professional friend, -and inquired of him its ,
real value. His friend examined it, and said
'Two dollars and a — half, without the box.'
Ttalph Ilardwan Was strongly of the opin.
ion that_thi gentleman'who left the violin in
hie Aare was a swindler, awl that the director
was a partner in the butlinese,•an4! that, Or :
Esther; they htid made him .their
That night shoddy'
_was marked up too per
cent..
r A jrAP!D _STnRy I -7,1.1eTS is a California
story" which is almost incredible: A hired
marl an ti:Napti farm was detailed to keep' a
watch on the cortifivid; and not let the black
,marauders invade the premises, butliketnany
other men in a similar sitdation, tried to
plan a method whereby so none)] dabor would
not have to he performed; so he hit upon
- the plan of so a king some corn io whisky and
placing it in the field so that the crow's would
surely get drunk, and then ho though he
would have a sure thiogn,on them, and could
kill them easily. ,Ile had tried to shoot them.
with astiot'gno, - but crows can 'smell powder
a - long' way'" , Aftei - Soaking sortie corn over
night,'he putra bountiful supply iu the field
early nest'. morning; and iu ~ a bout ;two 'or
three, bourn .he went out,.to,see : how, • firings.
were progressing, and
,mark you what
. 101 7
lows. Übe or the' crows, a little larger thao
the rest; latigithCred up acid taken posses
sion of almost all the
,porn, and had built
himself,,,R, bar out of cleds , of earth,,and was
retpil'liig the whisiyaoake'd corn to the oth
er 'erowi4,"•Vhargirtr- ihetii three grains of
sprouted intim 't.,i -ene"eollted grain. Our
hires mae A 00,484.010. heart. to kill.nny. . of
the creat) . tres that seemed. in their actions
liltsinanicind:
A. TOUGH Mxar.--0A citizen of Chicago
used_ to,go home late slightly inebriated, and
take a lunch usually set aside Pr ,hina by,
hie eaniideiiito Wife, One eight; Wilde the
usual' dish of cabbage arid' 'pork, she set a'
wash bearl'fllled with caps in - starch. They
lamp had long been: extinguished when the
staggering sot returned home, and by mis
take, when procceding-to satisfy his hunger,
he stuck his fork into the wrong dish. Ile
_svorke4 away at his• mouthful of caps
patiently for Tr time,, but, , being o this, maitteste.them, he said to hts wile,
' I you get rim. cabtage?
Theiare so' darned stringy that I caret'ohotir .
them' .143 , gracipus ! if the stupid feller ain't
eating . up alt my caps that I put starch in
over eight
tv,Clfl:;
C • , j;';'r,l
SIILOO .1 0 431" Itizoisek
• " A _Gentle Sint. .
tild'beit'con - HoPkies *as a worthy soul
it fnitferY-' k'enerilly 'res ptio fed' f his on rwtird
eborklbillietyiand religidtbrecak aridiThave
no doubt , Xhat,dtc.felt at heart tuosklofwhat
-he - prefeised - In zetirtirin direction he-fete---
areAtid ,desira, to steal. ;Hip ehlek
,meat,waii the making. of ,soap,, from „ashes
ihia - he 'gathered in the .oeighborti'Ocio);
aiid iii akin his`lioaip, !id' coats "obliged to
keep two or three big kettles , crf -IYe•
to which end an abUtidonce,of 410 was neees•
~.:! -.t % '.• '•• ^
1 Now. it, Aid happened thirt7the edettoon's
nearest npig,hher was Eaptain.Jaok, Patanes;
whose calling kept him open the..say..pater
the greater part of the time. stain Jack
' we t s asrpat, hand at keepipg, his family,zsup
pliedwith seasoued wood. /4,sitanweed
eitepaitre Wend tit, he often 'hid' vast
ded babied to his- hbfisii;
shore worked-up and etticked. :It , farther.
more chanced that the rear door of ita_ good
deacon's-soap hoube, opened directly upon
the,retix,of,Vaptaio Jaelr's • huge, 'Wood-,pile.
The temptation, was str/og.„ Surely, there
oe'nl4) hello harm in taking . a - few of,t, Cho
sekrering stiCia the Captain-Would' never
, miss-them'.' '
.Bbt the disease grew With the
nece , sity of feeding the fires p andAe:faneipi
—kind old soul--,that the captain would
never Miss, the Abstracted fuel. But he was
destined,taratiter au unloOkerkfor enlighten
meo t, as we, shall see. _ ,
• - firLcitiestiona.s:befofettle-cnrcit-ofiro--
tmlbeingliaritrumental mitaia into-the 'choir.
One .of, the singers had a bass violimbieh. he
was williog telday, if the blegirens , Would
• , .fith_heh .4 . l .__ 4 l t oriscr de
(dared that" - it'4sOlsi help the "sitioping won
derfull,y. , Bat, thip'sias before thecleys ty . hen
1011es' 'Were et:Aerated in stnired Places,
,sod
-several-ntAhet• 'brethren 'objeiitod. -- - .Deacon --
.Hopkins stile etirphatic,and bitter in' oppo
aition...4,t,nyeryitulltneeting of the allure&
he e*pressed , himself decidedly. Captain'
Jack,' Who chanCed to be on shore, was.pres
ent, and faVoreil - tbe intrOddction of the viol.
'(Bring it itr,roriedcthe denten; • 'and 'lid
go out ! I won't be sten_ where:hatvbig_ftd
-dle. 4 , i - tolerated • •
sWitiiyeai atiak'-to• that pltalgey -deacon 7'
asked * 0 caP!alc.
'Yes, replied,the irate functionary.
'mut CAp_tain_artelt,_with—ar—eitriens—
ttaink `e of the eye, 'you shan't be troubled
with tha acidic iu the church: DI 'buy it _
and hang it on wy wood pile I'
The poor deleon shrank away behind his
eaompus.ehirt 03 . 11ar ' the friends of
the `big,fiLldhe carried their paint.
, .
WATER IN FEVERS.—As is wet, known,
The tise'ol Witter in fevers was formerly pro
thibited,:,,Among thiPearly settlers of north•
pr G ,N e w. York was a Ili 3tl sneering from • •
violot fever. flis physician had given up
all hopes of 'his recovery, and had given the
information on his last visit. During the
night following, the sick man told his watch
er, as ho must die,
it could certainly do no
harm for him to have what water be wanted,
and begged the 'watcher to• go to a spring
near by' and get a pitcher full. So earnest
were ,his entr eaties , the man went and got it,
and the sfek'Man drank a.quart pitcher • full
orthe'ivater; tank until he was satisfied.--
He'soon• fell into a quiot 4 sleep, and after
some hours woke up . in• k profuse perspire
tion,,and, b:4 better.:, Ms medical attendant
Was astonished,in the miming to find him
convalescent, 'and h e soon reooyered his
a~yw J ,—~~~M
A FAIR, 71.001,—rti un d e rstand, Mr. 'Tones,
that you can turn any thing neater than auy
other man in town. •• •
4 Yes, Mr. Smith, I think so.'
'Ahem!. 41Ir..Iones, I don't liko to brag,
but ttei,o is nobody on earth oan turn a thing
cao `whittle'
4:Podh nonsense, Mr. Smith. Talk about
whittling-I...What:eau: you whittle as nice' as
I, can
4nythip e ,o..--everythiag, Mr. Jones. Yon
lu i St naine; The article' that I can't whittle
that'Yotietin- tuin, and I will jive this dollar
if I do not do:it' to the satisfaction of these
iuentlenten present.' (Ilere Mr. Smith tables
ho dollar.) • . ,
'Ahem! well, then,,, Mr. Smith, suppose
we take ttiO giiriii4onds,.itiit for a trial, you
knowyou' Whittle the hue while I turn tbo
otlier. l o . :. •
A: ' • Mr. Smith 4tered a moment
aod.vatne?, "I'lm! forfeited d ollar was quick
ly iliet> o.ed 'of ' by those present with groat
glee 'attcl
_Too P. D ": 4 ", .t y Pearl is 'fair, fat
and forty,"sud„uomarrip,d.,: She assuages to
obtaiti ati'honest and OomfOriable living by
keeping n'Auirll 9Tiiip or‘iiiitlies' in the lower
part of , the-city.i , She is , a'spruce old dame,
and ; a3npog ogticr artiolos; vends- spruce beer.
One evening u customer, called for a glass of
the bevcrdge inqUiliug at the same time if it
was. sew, made beer.
exelaipa - ell a bystander, just as the
vtorthy'darne 'lris about to reply in the al.
ydu it is 'Old maid
beer!. , •
The wpg•wal Been amideely to leave - , the
liidy's premises with a gla# lying after hire.
Sixty times was'lttjor - Gedisrat W. -
Geary under ace, and never defeated
" In of the
was
battles of'th'e *a^ bis first:Lora son was shot
douta.rmitt bits, bat be never faltered Ilia
field service Was of the hardest,kiud from the
opening of the war to its close.
' 11auna,'.Said tureoooiouslittle boy, who;'
against his will, was wade to root the cradle
otchis 'baby .113fro1her, , 'if the Lord hit any
41{ 43 1babie,s to'gtve attly, don't you take
!oto.!:
A boy in one of tags the Gei.
wan Diet is eomposed r4Ont,-ksOut,Screitzer
kaa3 . antl lager beer. I
}- g;3':
'NM*4 8
;ik!~ rt