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NI i t
There was e
That I rem
And thor
• Bright
And
, • .
W .,
V
INTER GOODS
•
which they feel confident thnt they will prr
cheap compared to former prices and quali'
We ask the ladies to call and look ow
/
Silks,
Poplins, .
Merinos,
Dclains,
Plaid goods,
Coburgs,
Twills,
/.. Cashmeres
The gentleme
Cactimeres Fancy.
Cassimores Plain,
Cl'
_..' .
Satinets,
Cords.
_ ' _ Fustains,
Tweeds
--Witlra-completelne of _ j_ j_
Boots,
Shoos,
Gaiters,
G'urn Shoos,
Fancy Blankets,
ITors e Blankets
6
MOND ARRIVAL)
AT THE C HEAP CORNER OF
Pain 8b HOEPLI 11,
in the way of a large and handsome stock of New
Winter Goods just received from the East
The firm tender their thanks to the community
for their very liberal patronage, and now ask them
to call and see their present assortment of desirable
'WINTER GOODS,
which they feel content thnt they will pronounce
cheap compared to foriner prices and quality
We ask the ladies to call and look over the array of
urn Sandals and Buskins •
Ladies Buffalo Over Shoes,
L'adies will pleasn"‘-rir-fintraszortment-of--
13raciloys Hoop Skirts,
Balmoraln,
Skirts for Misses kr, Children
'a'hali.:er and Ballardrale Flannels,
Opera, Army and Grey Flannels,
Wool and Cotton Yarns, all colors,
Oolored and Wbite Cotten Flannels,
Men's Undershirts and Drawers,
' Men's gonndnbonts,
Ladies Breakfast Shawls,
Long and square Shawls
Blankets,
Courlias, .
Rugs,
Gum Cloth,
road Rags,
Raskets,
Packets,
Butter Prints,
Brooms;
Coffee,
Spices, &e.
Grain Bags,
Bagging, &e.
The subscribers kindly ask the community to call
and see their handsome stock of goods now oven
and will vouch that persqns will he convinced ifita
/trims have fallen," and greatly too, and to con
vince yourselves of the ftcts just drop in and make
aninspection of goods and prices.
PRICE & ROEFLICH.
Nov 23, ]866.
186 74
JUST RETURNED.
3.1 r. Metcalfe, Senior Partner of the firm of
3IETCALFE & HITESIREW
gPaiLDIBERSEUEL% 2
3RAS just returned (coin the East where he he s
boon since last week buyirig all such goods as
sf hey are ant of, and also buying all,barga ins offored.
Tho new goods will be opened to morrow, tsatur-
Jay January sth. Those who want bargains in the
Ery Goods airil Notion line go to No. 15 Main St.
vbere you will be sure to find them.
Goods of every description Wholesaled, at city
jobbers prices. M. & H.
chamberslieirg, Jan. 4, 1867.
OHEAP, Eliga
Vcents.
gay
Alpacas,
Moliair.Peps
_ A Itwool Delains
n use directed to the beautiful line of
thsA
Vcstings.
.1 cans,
Flannels
Children's Shoes
Whips
Bawls,
Spoops,
Ladles,
Sagar,
Teas,
;t, and item utiful 'Winona fur 12i
Jf 10 cents at
• ItlRD,4l4n; & ThiEsltEtted.
"PCIOEITICIALM.B.
r;," • • • _re.'
•.' • ^- "1" .. " *. .' 'C•IIP' ‘:;‘.
4
z • ,
• - •
G • . .
There was a place in childhood,
That I remember well;
And there a voice of sweetest tone
Bright fairy tales did tell;
And gentle words and fond embrace,
Were given with joy to me,
When I was in that happy place, _
Upon my mother's knee.
'My mother dear, my -mother dear!
My gentle, gentle mother.
When fairy tales were ended,
Good night she softly said,
And kissed and laid mo down to sleep,
Within my tiny bed;
And holy words she taught me there,
Methinks I yet tin see,
Her Angel eye, as dose I knelt
Beside my mother's knee.
My mother dear, &c. -
In sickness of my childhood,
•
The perils of my prime,
The sorrows of my riper years,
The cares of every time;
When doubt of danger weighed me down,
Then pleading all for me,
It aas a fervent prayer to Heaven,
That bent my mother's knees
My mother dear, &c.
One day a limner's lazy boy
Was hoeing out the corn,
And moodily had listened ng
To heal the dinner horn,
The welcome blast was heard at last,
And down he dropped his hoe;
But the old inanshouted in his ear—
g'ol- _
y boy_ ROO out your_rowt"
Although a "hard one" was the row,
To use a plowman's phrase,
The asTTCairoirS - h - a - v - e - it,
—Beginning well to "haze,"—
"I can" said he, and manfully
He seized again his hoe,
And the old-man smiled to see
The boy hoe out his row.
The lad this text remembered,
And proved the moral well
That perseverance to the end
lAtlast_willnobly tell.
Take courage then! resolve you can,
And strike a vigorous blow;
In life's great field of varied toil
Always hoe out your 'row.
WCZSICI3MI&X.JA.N"I".
Burritt on Abraham Lincoln.
gland,__hasjust-1
published a characteristic treatise on "The
Mission of Great Sufferings," which is rep.
resented in English papers as a work. of sin
gular interest. One says: "Its discourses of ,
suffering, its mission and its power,. with
wonderful profundity, intelligence and pa
thos." In the last chapter, Mr. Burritt
comes naturally to the tragic events of the
present day, among which an appropriate
place is given to Use like and death of
Lin
coin:
Elililt .Burritt, no
.. . .
' "We now come to another event which
moved powerfully the whole of Christendom,
and produced an effect upon the foremost
nations which no occurrence of that or other
order have ever accomplished. It was an
event that came in a moment with no pre
monition. It was the sudden extinction of
one human life except its light. There was
an honest hearted man who came up out of
the commonest walks of flu; people, and was
raised to the Presidential chair of the Amer
ican reptiblic - to - represent and execute its
will. The lifting up of that man to fill this
high place split the nation in sunder. The
chasm was dark and wide. The struggle to
close it on one side and widen it on the oth
er was long and terrible. Half a million of
precious lives were thrown into the breach,
and it ran red and deep with the best blood
of the severed nation. The tall, gaunt man
of furrowed face and 'plaintive eyes, wit)
stood in his place with steady faith and pur
pose, being in the stature of his elevation
what Saul was to the Israelites 'from his
shoulders upwards,' was from beginning to
end the butt of satire and denunciation,
much at home and more abroad. In a cer
tain sense the people of the North sight
have said, he bore the iniquities of us all
For all who hated the northern cause hi t
him and bruised his spirit with their hard
and cruel sayings.
"In addition to all ibis harden of reproach
piled upoti his shoulders, because they were
higher than the peoples" whose he was a.nd
whom he served, hip personal antecedents
end associations were thrown in his face in
all the epithets that ridicule could invent.
Foreign satirists lampooned him with their
witicisms and caricatured him with their
pencils. Friends fell away and foal fell on
him, as the sanguinary conflict went on from
year to year. The furrows' of his face deep.
ened; the sallow ridges of his brow strewed
the mole-walks of care were ploughing night
and day his inner sonl. But as those sad,
deep and solemn eyes withdrew furtbei in•
ward, they beamed with the old steady light
of faith and hope. dud according to his
faith was it given to see that for which, his
spirit prayed with longing most intense, lie
w the long and bloody struggle concluded.
Heawahe wide rent in the nation closing
\
Witha foot on either side, ho stretched out
hie long, gamut arms. and essayed to press
the two sections, like estranged sisters, to
Yarn,
- Keg ,
Chocola to,
WAYNESBORO', FRANKLIN COUNTY, PENNSYLVANIA, FRIDAY HORNING, MARCH I, 1867.
NT MOTHER DEAR.
ROE OUT YOUR ROW.
hie• broad and tender breast.
"His was a great life, but his .death was
greater still—the greatest, perhaps, that .has
moved:the world for. a thousand yeare.—
When he stood with his tender arms around
the North and Sou - th, holding them to his
heart that-both might soften theirs at its
spirit, his life's work was done. Then began
the sublime mission of his death. While
those sunken eyes were shining with the
gladness of his soul at the glimpse given him
as to Noses on Pisgah's top, of the Canaan
aide of his country's future, in a moment
their light was quenched forever on earth.—
An assassin pierced his brain as with a bolt
of lightning; and he fell, and great was the
fall of that single man. With Lim fell a mil
/ion enemies of his cause and country at home
and abroad. If the last act of-his life was
to close the rift in a continent, the first act
of his death was to close the chasm between
two hemispheres. Never before was Eng
land brought so near "to his country. In the
great overflow ostler sympathy thp mother
country was flooded and tided toward her
first barn daughter, weeping at the bier of
the great departed; and she bent over the
mourner with words of tender condolence.-'-
Blood is thicker than water; and the latent
instincts of nature came forth in generous
speech and sentiment toward a sorrowing
nation. In that overflow of fellow ; feelinm,
the sympathy with the South and its unright
eous cause was drowned, or burnt up by a
spirit of indignation at the takine ° off, which
seemed to consume at a breath the animus
that had aided with secession- There was
light as well as heat in that fire; and in the
light thousands of southern sympathizers
saw in a different aspect the cause they had
upheld,"
Gen• Washington at Home.
Gen. Washington stood six feet three in
his slippers, and in the pritnn___of_Llife—was-1
- r - a - th - er — s en er t an otherwise, but as straight
as an arrow. his form was well proportion- 1
ed and evenly balanced, so that he carried his
tallness gracefully, and 'appeared strikingly
-well-on-horse - back. There - has never
. been
__.a-more-active.-sinewy-figure than - his when
he was a young man, it was only in later
life that his movements became low and
dignified. His wife was a plump, pretty lit
tle woman, very sprightly and gay _in her__
young days, and quite as fond of having her
own way as ladies usually are. She settled
down into a good, plain domestic wife, who
looked sharply aftt - nlier servants; and was
seldom seen without her needles in full play.
She was far from being what we should now
call an educated woman. Scarcely any of
the ladies of that day know nfuch more than
to read their prayer book and,almantto, and
keep simple accounts.—Washington
probably never read a book Through in her
life, and as to her spelling—the less the bet
ter. Washington himself before he became
a public man, was a bad speller. People
were not so particular then, in such matters
as they are now; and besides, there really
was no settled system of spelling a hundred
years ago. When the General wrote for a
rhea& of paper, a beaver ' hatt, a suit of
- ‘'eloatlies,' and a pair — o ‘rnatin' shoes, there
was no Webster unabridged to keep people's
spelltug within bounds. Nor was he much
of a reader of books. He read a little of the
History of England now.and then, and a pa.
per from the Spectator on rainy days, but
he had but little literary taste. He was es
sentially an out of door man, and few things
were more disagreeable to him thert_confina
men at the desk, There was nothing in the
house which could be called a library; he had
a few old-fashioned books, which he seldom
disturbed and never road long at a time.—
The General and his wife - lived happily to
gether, but it is evident that, like most heir.
Cases, she was a little exacting, and it is high•
ly probable that the great Washington was
sometimes favored with a eurtaia lecture.—
The celebrated authoress Miss Bremer, is au•
thority for this surmise. She relates, that a
gentleman once slept at Mount Vernon in
the room next to that occupied by the mas
ter and the mistress of the mansion; and
when all the inmates were in bed, and the
house was still he overheard through the
thin partition, the voice of Mrs. Washington.
He could not bet listen, and it was a curtain
lecture which she was giving her lord, fie
had done something during the day which
she thought ought to have been done differ
ently, and she was giving her opinion in
somewhat animated tones. The great...man
listened in silence till she had dome, and then
without a remark upon the subject in Laud,
said. -
"Now, good sleep to yon, my dear."
What an example to husbands I
When Washington was appointed to com
mand the- revolutionary armies, it is plain
from his letters home that one of his great
est objections to accepting the appointment
was the `•uneasiness," as he termed it, that
it would cause his wife to have hire absent
from home.—James Parkin.
EFFICACY or ONIONS.—A writer .says:
"We are troubled often with severe coughs,
the result of colds of standing, which may
turn to consumption or premature• death
[lard toughs cause sleepless nights by con
stant irritation in the throat, and a strong
effort to . throw off offensive matter from the
lungs.. The remedy I propose has been tried
by me, and recommended by me with good
resulr, which is simply to take into the s tom
ach before retiring for the night a piece of
raw onion, after chewing. This esetalent in
an uncooked state_ is 'very heating, and col
feats the waters from the lungs and throat,
causing immediate relief to the patient."
If two men, riot being relatives, slion:43
each marry the daughter of the other, in what
relationship will the off:Tring of said two
marriages stand to each other?
Our fire engines--play they be like old
maids, ever ready, but never vvantodi
Brigham Young. ,
The census of his IVives—llis First, Last,
an d several Intermediates—Mary , Angell
Young' is the first living and legal wife of
the prophet. She is a native of New York,-
and is a fine-ldokingintelligent woman. She
is large, portly and dignified. tier hair is
well sprinkled with the frosts of age; her
clear hazel eyes and melancholy countenance
indicate a soul where sorrow reigns supreme.
She has bean much attached to her husband,
and his infidelity has made deep inroads up
on her mind„ Her deep seated , melancholy
often produces flights of insanity, which in
crease with her declining years.
Lucy Decke ee y the first wife in
"plurality," o the second 'woman."
Lucy Decker was marrie to hue Seely,
ankhad two children. Sb afterward be
came a Mormon, and went to Nauvoo to re
side. Her husband (Seely) was somewhat
dissipated, but treated her well. She, how
ever, saw Brother Brigham; and loved him.
Ho visited her, told her that Seely could
never give her an "exaltation" in the eter
nal world; that he. being "high in_the priest
hood," could make her a queen in the first
resurrection. - She yielded to these induce.
meats and the promptings of her inclination,
left her husband, and was "sealed" to Brig
ham Young.
Lucy Decker has brown hair, dark eyes,
small features, a fair skin and short of stat
ure, but quite enmbompoint. She would
seongly remind you of a New England wife,
"fat, fair and forty." In common with near
ly all the inmates of the harem, she is of ve
ry ordinary intellect and limited education.
Clara Decker, sister of Lucy Decker, is a
short thick set person, very much like Lucy
in appearance. She is much more intelli
gent and agreeabla,than her sister, and in
every way her supior. She is 'also. quite a
favorite with the prophet, has three or four
ch-ildrerr - and a ac to ser "hus-
band.'
Harriet Cook, was in early plurity, having
been sealed to Brigham at vilVinter Quar
ters,"_ou-the Missouri riveri - whilt, die "Won
mons were on their way to Utah.--This was
five years before polygamy was publicly pro
claimed in Utah as a divine institution.—
Harriet is very tall, has light hair, blue eyes,
a fair complexion and short nose. She is
rather_slender, but has much power of endu
rance and a !ook of determination.
• YOUNG'S LAST WIPE.
Dr- Adonis, after various wanderings, has
turned up in Utah. In a letter from the
promised land he writes, under date of No
vember 22, a e follows abo u t Brigham
Young's last wife at the tabernacle o n Sun
day last. The lady's name before marriage
waer,Maria—Folsom.- -ller - former residence
was Council Bluffs, lowa. She is an im
perious looking young beauty, of the Grecian
rather than the Roman order, and is very
imperious and jealous. Like all passionate
and jealous women, she — isnoble-heartell—
Miss Folsom is I3righam's last wife and pet.
Two of the President's daughters play at the
theatre, and are great favorites with the Gen
tile portion of the comtnunity. One is mar-
rigid,, (lire.Clawson) and the other (Miss
Jane) is single, but is being waited on by a
distinguished editor."—Allhoctukee Macon.
sin.
The Mormon Girls
Richard Williams, who delifered alecture
at Buffalo, recently, on the Mormons, allu
destas_follows-to-one-of -t-ho--disturbing ele
ments among the Saints:
Tliere is one element among themselves
that is troublesome. The general testimony
of the Gentiles who have lived in intimate
social relations with them is that the young
gills (to their honor be it said) aro mostly
disaffected. Growing up with it, they have
seen the institution with all its oboannations,
and opposed as it is to all their holier feel.
inns and better ineincts, no amount of spiri.
tual thunder can entirel y control them.
Here, as everywhere, they are a privileged
class, and cannot very well be whipped or
imprisoned. Like most of the descendants
of Eve, they will talk, and are ever ready to
elope with a Gentile who has the courage
and can get away with them. They cannot
marry a Gentile and remain peacefully at
home. Very naturally they prefer a whole
Gentile to one-tenth of a r ,Mormon. The
most effectual way of breaking up the whole
system would be to send.an army of 10,000
unmarried men there, and protect every man
who married a Mormon woman and brought
her to camp. 'We might in this way get rid
of the nuisance without bloodshed or incur
ling the odium of religions persecution.
REMEMBER. TrIE SAIIIDATIL-At a respect
able boarding-house in New York, a number
of years ago, were fifteen young men. Six
of them uniformily appeared-at the break
fast table on sabbath morning, shaved, dress
ed, and prepared for public worship, which
they attended both forenoon arid afternoon
All become highly respected and useful citi
zene. The other nine were ordinarily ab
sent from the breakfast-table on Sabbath
morning. At noon they appeared at the
dinner table shaved and dressed in a decent
manner. In the afternoon they went out,
but net ordinarily to church; nor were they
usually en in the place of worship. One
of-thynbs is now living, and in a reputable
employment; the other eight became openly
vicious. All these failed in business, and
are now dead. Some of them came to an
untimely and awfully tragic end.
wealthy a
Luau may Fay as did a worthy and wealthy
citizen, "The keeping of the Sabbath saved
me:" It will, if duly observed, save all.
In the language of its Anther, "They shall
ride upon the high places of the earth,"
"Jake, tell me the biggest lie you over
old, and will give you a g.laEs of beer."
"A lie! I never told a lie ininy life."
"thaw the beer, key."
F 0 .11 SAREN.
By J boo
The diamond likedew drops were pearly and pure: -
And many bright objects invite and allure,
All beam with a smile in the breeze of mom,
But the love-tie is broken, all scatterci and torn.
When etra nge birds are warding their heartlovin g
And roses were blooming till round to my gaze,
'Twos then that:my hopes in the future were cast,
But her pre . tended love was too fervent to last.
She came with devotion, I thought with true love'
Of all youthful fairies I esteemed her above;
But ah! soon the sun of affection had set, _
She turned with a frown that I ne'ct shall forget.
She map smile at her deeds with intrinsical glee,
Still her image I cherish as a rose from the lea,
The breath of the twilight with mystical lore.
Seems to say in a whisper, she loves me no more
Death in Doors•
Multitudes of persons have a great horror
of going out of doors for fear. of taking cold.
If it is a little damp, or a little windy, or a
little cold, they wait, wait, and wait. Mean•
while weeks and even months pass away,
and they never, durinff 4e the whole time,
breathe a single breath of pure air. The re•
suit is, they become so enfeebled that-their
constitutions have no power of resistance;
the least thing in the world gives them a cold
all the time, and this is nothing more or less
than consumption. Whereas, if an opposite
practice had been followed of going out for
an hour or two every day, regardless of the
weather, so it is not actually falling rain, a
very different result would have taken place.
The tuthis,the---more-a-persan - is --- ry
doors, the less easily does he take cold. it
is a widely known fact that persons who
camp ourevery night, or sleep under a tree
Tor weekstomether,_seldnuLtake cold at-all.
— The truth rs,_many_faf-eur---ailments-, : •
those of a most fatal form, are taken in the
house, and not out of doors, taken by re
moving parts of clothing too soon after
coming into the house; or lying down on 'a
bed or sofa; when in a tired or esausted con
dition from having engaged too vigorously
in domestic employments. Many a pio has
cosrat industrous man a' hundred dollars.
A human MO many a time has paid for an
apple dumpling.
IVhen our wives get to work they become
so interested in it that they find themselves
in an utterly masted condition. Their am
bition to complete a thing, to do some work
well, sustains them until its completion,
and
the moment it is completed the mental and
physical condition is one of exhaustion,when
a breath of air will give a cold, to settle in
the joints, to wake up next morning with
inflammatory rheumatism; or with a feeling
of stiffness or soreness, us if they had been
pounded in a bag; or a sore throat to worry
and trouble them for. months; or lung fever
to put them in the grave in less than a week.
— (furwives - sh - OURI work by the day, if they
must work at all, and not by the" job, it is
more economical in the end to see how little
' work they can do in an hour instead of how
much. It is slow, steady, continuous labor,
which brings health,'strength, and a good
digestion. Fitful labor is ruinous to all.'
The Farmer that would not Sell.
Ikln — Coffin;ln - his "Four Years of
iitg„" tells the following incident, which oc
curred as our troops were moving to Gettys
burg:
When the sth Corps passed through the
town of Liberty, a farmer rode into the vil
lage mounted on his farm wagon. Bin load
was covered with white table cloths.
"What have you got to sell, old fellow?
Bread, eh?' said a soldier, raising a ••corner
of the cloth, and revealing loaves of sweet,
soft, plain bread, of the finest wheat, with
several bushels of ginger-cakes.
"What do yoa ask fora loaf?"
-"Haven't - any to self," said thefarmer. •
"Ilaven'toany to sell? What are ye here
for!"
The fariner-made no reply.
"See here, old fellow, won't poi sell me a
bunk of your gingerbread!" said the soldier,
producing an old wallet.
"No."
"Well; you're a mean old cuss. If. would
be setving you rigl.t to tip you out of you
old bread cart. Here we aro marching a
night and ail day to protect your propel4l
and fight the rebs:—We haven't had any
breakfast, and may not have any dinner
You are a act of mean cusses round here, I
reckon, 'said the soldier.
crowd of soldiers had gathered, and oth
ers expresvd their indignation. The old
farmer stood -up on his wacon seat, and took
off the table-cloths, and replied: .
"I didn't bring my bread here to sell.- My
wife and daughters sat up all night to tazike
it for you, and you're welcome to all I've g9t
and I wish I had tea times as much. Help
yourselves, boys."
"Hurrah! hurrah! hurrah! Bully for you!"
"You're a brick!" Three cheers for the old
man!" "Three more for the girls!"
They threw up their caps, and fairly
danced with joy. The bread and cakes
were gone in a twinkling.
•'See here, my friend, I take back all the
hard words I said about you," said the sol
dier, shaking hands with the farmer, who
sat on -his wagon overcome with emotion.
GOOD I'OR. MANY,--A gentleman (Hain
at a hotel in Chestnut street, a• fewo d ; .s
skim s asked one of the waiters, an
just from the Emerald Isle, and as green as
grass, for a napkin. She, not knowing what
was meant, replied, "Not one left, sir; •all
gone. The redheaded gentleman ate the
last." "The deuce he did," said the other,
, "thee ask him if he won't have It fried towl, j 1
iu addition,"
[For'the Record
Clasp thy band meekly over the still
breast—they've:no more work• to do; close
the weary eyes—they've no more tears to
, the
shed; part an p locks—there's.no more
pain to bear. CI sod alike to dove's kind
voice, and ealum y's stinging whisper.
0, if in that illed heart you have ruth
lessly planted thorn; if from that pleading'
eye you ha carelessly turned away; if your
loving glance, nod kindly word and clasping
band, have come—all too late—Then God
forgive you! No frown gathers on that mar
ble brow as you gaze—no SCO CI curls the
Chiseled lip—no flush or V 01. 1 .0 cl feelings
mounts to the blue veined temples. •
God forgive you! - fur yourfeet, t must
shrink appalled from death's cold rt r—
'your faltering tongue asks: Can this
death? Your fading eye lingers lovingly on .
the sunny earth, your clammy bands feel its
last feeble flutter.
0, rapacious grave! yet another victim for
thy voiceless keeping! What! no Words of
greeting from the Tiousehold sleepers? No
warm welcome from a sister's loving lips?—
No throb of pleasure from the dear mater
nal bosom?
&met all! -•
0, if those broken limbs were never gath -
ered up! If beyond death's swelling flood
there were no eternal shore! If for the strug
gling bark there were no port of peace! 11
athwart that lowering cloud sprang no bright
bow of promise.
The following story is told of a Yankee
captain and his mate. Whenever there was
a plum pudding made, by the captain's or- •
dors all thc plums were put into one place
next to the cagtain„wiw-after-hel-ping—frinP—
se , passed it to the mate who never found
any plums in this part of it. Well, after
this game had been played for - some time,
the mate prevailed on the steward to place
the end which had ne_ plums in next to the
am. •The captain no sooner saw the
pudding than he discovered ho had the
wrong end.,"of it. Picking up the dish., and
turning it in his bands as if merely for ex
.arnining the china, he said, "this dish cost
me two shillings Liverpool," and put it
down again as th withoinkt design, with
the plums ne to iruse "Is it possible"'
said the mate taking up the dish; "I shou n't
suppose it was worth more than a shilling,"
acid, as if in perfect innocence, ho put down
the dish' with the plum end next to himsolf_
The captain laughed, the mate laughed.--
The captain looked at the mete, the mato
looked 'at the captain. "I tell you what,
young one," said the captain, "you've found
me out, so we'll just cut tho pudding length.
wise thietTine, and have theplums fairly din.
tributed hereafter."
PINE LANOUAOE.-A Southern corres
pondent in one of his letters informs us of
novel and economical mode of courtship in
Florida. "As you have never seen the lan
guage of pine I will give it you here. A
gentleman wishing to court a lady, and not
wishing to 'face the music' i person, sends
his lady-love a piece of pine, signifying,
pine for thee;' and the, wishing to give a
favorable answer, scuds him in return a
pine knor, meaning, 'pine not; or if she
wishes t o say NO, she sends a burned
pine knot, thereby signifiinr, make light
of .our •itie."
M AHINCi A EWE ADOPT A LAME —No
find the following in ono of out exchanges.
It is worth a trial;
"When you find a ewo with a dead lard,
tileatiar , b *piteou3ly and mourning over it, if
you wish to make her adopt another, catch,
the ewe, milk her own milk upon the lamb,
then remove the dead one out of her sight,
step back out of the way and witness i the
joy of the mother at the supposed restoration
of her offspring.".
• A gentleman traveling—in—lreland, over
took a peasant and asked. ',Who lives in
that house on the hill, Pal?"
One Mr. Cassidy, sir; but he is dead—rest
his sowU"
"flow long big" he been dead?" asked the
gentleman, '
"Well, yer honor, if he lived till next
month he'd been dead just twelve months."
'•Of What did he die?"`•
"Troth, str,.he died of a Tuesday."
NEVER.—When Cel. A— was in com
mand at a post, just as the soldiers were cal•
led mat for drill on a certais - rnorning, it was
noticed that one of them had only blacked
the fore parts of his shoes, leaving the back
parts unblocked and of a dirty red color.—
The Col. noticed it, and said, "Meson, you
have not blacked the back parts of your.
shoes." "Colonel," replied Hinson, "a good
soldier never looks behind hina.".
J. B. was a stingy old creature, eager for
money; but he 'was a zealous member of a
church,.and ostentatious in his religious ex
ercises. "John." said Catharine to her broth
er, "what could have made that stingy old
wretch a Christian?" "I can toll you," said
John; "he has read that the streets of the
New Jerusalem are paved with gold, and ha
is determined to ge ere."
Why is a
fire ? Bee
better. A
Some wires are so jealous that they don't
like their spouses to embrace a fair opportu.
atty.
"Facts are very stubborn things,' said a
husband to his wife. •
"Are they?" she answered. "Then what
a fact you must be"
When is a greyhound not a. greyhound"
When it turns a hare.
err "St cet 2-
NUNER 36-
A Beautiful Sentiment.
Alas, for love if thig'be all,
And naught beyond.
a parlor like a boo
se the sooner it is pat o