Village record. (Waynesboro', Pa.) 1863-1871, June 22, 1866, Image 1

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;
By W. Blair.
VOLUME XX
NEW SPRING.
AND
SANEMBESI
GEORGE STOVER,
HAS RETURNED FROM PHILADEL
PHI& WITH A SUPPLY OF
DRY GOODS,
NOTIONS, ()ITINSWIIE
GROCERIES,
To which he invites the attention of
of his patrons and the public generally.
March, 30,1866.
AMERICAN LIFE INSURANCE AND
•
TRUST C 0.,.
Corner Fourth and Walnut Streets, Philadelphia
Incorporated 1850. Charter Perpetual. Author
ized Capital, $500,000. Paid Up Capital, $250,000
Philadelphia, Feb. 4, 1864.
The Trustees have this day declared a Dividend
of FIFTY PER CENT, on alt premiums received
upon Marvel. POLICIFS during the year ending De
c( tuber 21st, 1863; and in force at that date. the a
bove amount to be credited to said Policies, and
have also ordered the Dividend of 1860 on Policies
issued during that year to he paid, as the annual
prt miums on said Policies are received.
OFFICERS.
Treeident—:A lexonder Whilltlin.
Secretary cod Treasurer—John S. Wilson.
.Aeluary--John C. Sims.
BOARD OF TRITSTEES.—Alexander
din, J. ,Eilgitr Thomson, George Nugent, Hon. Jns.
Pollock. Albert C. linlicrni. P. D. Mingle. Samuel
Work. William .1. Howard, Hon. Joseph Allison,
Samuel 'l' Bodine, John Aikman, Charles F. Hons
hu, Isaac Hazlehurst.
Wit. G. Soso, Chambersburg Pa., is the general
Agent of the American Lite Insurance and Trust
Company for Franklin 'Co.
Jos. Donnas, Agent for Waynesboro' and vicin
ity.
RE FERENCES.—Jona Pampa and Wuzzam
B.
BROM:ELTON.
Call and get a pamphlet. •
JOS. DOUGLAS, Agent.
Oct. 13, 186 5 , ly
EAGLE HOTEL.
Central Square, Hagerstown, Md.
I HE above well-known and established Hotel
i r
has been re-opened and entirely renovated, 'by
t to uneersigried, and now Offers to the public every
comfort and attraction found in the' best hotels.—
TH E TABLE is bountifully supplied with 'every
&hairy' the market will afford; THE 'SALOON
contains 11w choicest liquors,- and is eonstantly and
Skilfully attended. Tfi B -STABLE is thoroughly
repaired, and careful Ostlers alweiya really to ac
commodate easterners. - .
- , : ;LORD. FISHER; .Proprietor.
Thigerstown,,,Tune _2-1f
- •
: , 11r's Horst) St, Cattle:Powden .
Bl'ONEft having' pu'rchnsed 'af
.I.ll.;*Morlzt;,tho'.'reeipe for making th'e above
„fitr-famed liprtniandthittle Powder; forPennsylvi
, .nia ana I.l4:o7titn4tithes: this Mathollitinfoi
~fitrniera, ikOris t :46 7 ,tkai' on' hand' and
good suilValivayp . on
C'Ountri .therehants Aneethati.lc - eni4hgliuth articles
- for seleoyouittdowe - 11 , tirsttpply theMeilvieitirith a
- mentity, AlLsoll •on.coonniasioi ifciicash
tOi4ANOY-be 00040
" AiliuttflY 4:0
-W-lINESBORO, = FRANKLIN COUNTY, PENNSYLV-A-NIAFRIDAYMR-N1%,-Igi
PaET=~7A.L.
ANGRY WORDS,
Angry words are lightly spoken,
Ina rash and thoughtless hour,
Brightest links of life nre bioken
By their deep, insidious power.
Hearts inspired by warmest feeling,
N e'er before by anger stirred,
Ofe_are_rent_past_human_kualing,
By a single angry word.
• oilen-dro s-of care-and—sorrow
Bitter poison drops are they;
Weaving for the coming morrow
Saddest memories of to-day. '
Angiy words—oh, let them never
From the tongue unbridled slip,
Check them ere they soil the lip.;
Love is much too pure and holy,
Friendship is too sacred far
For a moment's reckless folly
Thus to desolate and mar.
Angry• words are lightly spoken,
Bitterest thoughts are rashly stirred;
Brightest links of life are broken
By a single.angry.word
For the Record.
BROTHER, THINK.
BY J• D.O
I3rothe.,r,,thrrc are many vices,
IWiny sins for you to shun,
Which will waft your spirit downward.
When this little life is done.
o-not-louch_ he gambling table,
t 4 in any death are lurking there,
• will bring you down to sorrow,
Listen to a mother's prayer.
Do not drink the bar-room beverage,
It is death's alluring snare,
Sat in trying to deceive you, •
. Listen to a mother's prayer. -
Do not use God's name profanely,
God who rules both sea and air,
For he's . righteous, just and holy,
Listen to a mother's prayer.
Let your ebreeter be spotless,
Spotless pure as unstained snow,
Keep the ten commandments holy,
Evil thoughts you'll never know.
If perchance your life may linger,
Till you reach three score and ten,
Brother, these few things remember,
God •will be a father then•
The Highlander's Prayer
. A Scotch highlander, who served in the
first disastrous war with the American colo
nies, was brought one evening before his
commanaing officer, charged with the capital
offence of being in communication with the
enemy.. The charge could not well be pre
ferred.at a more dagerous time. Only a few
weeks had elapsed since the execution of
Major Andre, and the indignation of the
'British, exasperated almost to madness by
the event, had not yet cooled down.' There
was, however, no direct proof against the
highlander. Ile had been seen iu the gray
of the twilight, stealing out from aclump of
underwood that bordered on one of the huge
forests which, at that period, covered by
much the greater part of the United Provin
ces, and which, in the immediate neighbor
hood of the British, swarmed with the troops
of Washington. All the rest was mere in•
ference and conjecture. The poor man's do
fence was summed up in a few words. Ile
had stolen away from his fellows, he said, to
spend an hour in private prayer. .
''llave you been in the habit of spending
hours in private , prayer?" sternly'askod the
officer, himself a Scotchman and a Presby
terian
The Highlander replied 'in the affirma
tive,
"Then," said the other, drawing out his
watch, —never in all your life had you more
need of prayer than now; kneel down, sir,
and pray aloud, that we may all here you,"
The Highlander, in the expectation of in•
strait death, knelt down. His prayer was
that of ono long ndquainted with the appro
priate language in which the christian ad
dresses his God it breathed of imminent
peril, and earnestly implored the Divine in
terposition in the threatened daoger—the
help of him who, in times of extremity, is
strong to'cleliver. Ir exhibited, in short, a
man who was thoroughly • conversant with
the scheme of redemption, and fully impres
sed with the necessity of a personal interest
in„, the advantages which it secures, had made
tfe •businesit of salvation the work of many
a solitary hour, sad had, in consequence,•ae 7
'quired much fluency in eipressing all his va
rious•wauts as they occurred, and •thoughts
1 . and wishes as they arose.
"You may go, air," said the officer, as be
concluded; yon have; I dare say, not been
in correspondence with the enemy tonight"
- "Ills atatoment," he'ton tin uecl, adclressieg
himself to the other officers, "is, i doubt not,
perfectly:-correct., No one could have,prek
ed so
who haves ver attended drill, always get
lon ill at review." - -H ugh- • •
TrTr integiestive peep% fry
. . • • •••• tho'.apet
eifies for oliolera that are given, in; she pa
pers, they will soon place theinselyetigheyo n d
the reach ofichalera=er any other- disease'.
A. Wetarri.ll3r Neolocrmpat,por d Xxxclepormaecat Azipcna. nll - 1131.11c4cpertei.
Matrimony and Morphine.
On Tuesday night a number of guests as
sembled on Sixteenth street to witness a mar
riage ceremony. The wedding -feast was
spread—the priest came with his cross and
prayer book—the groomsmen assembled with
their white kids and paper shirt collars—the
bridesmaids were present with their satin
flounces and globular waterfalls—the bride,
blushing like Aurora, was arrayed in snowy
robes, orange wreath and glittering jewels—
the wedding ying.was ready, and everything
was prepared to launch the young couple
upon tlie Hymeneal stream, amid rejoicing,
flowers, kisses, tears, tremors and congratu
lations. Only one thing was needed to make
the affair complete, and that was the ples
ence of the bridegroom. Without him the
wedding would be like the play of Hamlet
-
with Hamle I AP'
In , Ispensa
presence the whole affair must fall through
or prove a failure. But, important as was
his presence, the appointed bridegroom came
not-. - Hollis passed. The priest became
disgusted and left--the uncle of the bride
drew - - re looked
6 . re - din — the face-=f- lie groomsmen lookei.
sour—the bridesmaids languished and the
bride grew nervous and pale. Still the lag.
Bard lingered. Midnight approached. The
hoarse clarion of the ancient .Shanghai in
the yard announced the approach of the
"wee sma' hours," and still no bridegroom
appeared—the uncle-was in a towering pas
sion—the bridesmaids wept—the groomsmen
went to bed. A committee was sent to look
'I or the reclusant _ lover.—and i —after - visiting
-- fh - :narble drug store and not finding him
there, they went to his room and found him
fast asleep. Ile was aroused from his slum
ber, and hurried off to the bride's house:—
When he arrived there the guests were gone.
Ile gave as an esmise - .that, feeling unwell,
he had taken a dose
. or morphine and
.had
overslept himself, but was now ready to face
the music ankgo-through - the - tryinvorcleal:
By this time the native pride of the fair
bride had become aroused, and .the sleepy
gentleman was informed that the wedding
was indefinitely postponed. The bridegroom
returned to his pestle 'and mortar, and the
youtiglady remains at home - a - fair ungather
ed flower. It was a near approach to a wed
ding, but "a miss is as good as a mile."
What I Saw
As I was going up street, I saw Mrs—Pe
troleum with two barrels and a half' of oil
made into a cloak, which hung in graceful
folds from her ample figure—on her head
was nearly half a barrel of the same fluid,
and yet she held her head so high that one
would almost itnlgine it was as empty as a
blasted head of wheat.
Behind her I saw a woman with two mow
ing machines in the folds of her dress, and
yet how gracefully it swept the streets. A
young girl was with her who had around her
neck ten barrels of flour. A little further
up the street I saw a lady with four revol
vers, at ten dollars apiece, swinging from her
oars.
Lady number five was enrobed in fifty bales
of shoddy, and she marched into the store as
though she was at the head of a regiment,
and with a voice such as a Colonel might
use, when speaking, to all his men, asked of
the clerk, "be theta the silks you advertise
tier evening. wear ?"
With a solemn look and a profound bow,
ft 4)
he answered, "them they be, am."
It was the last named lad who asked an
acquaintance to write a list f books, with
pretty bindings, that she mi t 'fall our new
hbraty in our new house."
As I turned to go out of the store I met
an old acquaintance who, a fewtyears be
fore, was a schoolmate, and whose last com
position was to nie to correct, and the
word 'but .was spelled 'bee'—but she had on
so many pairs of hoots for a veil, that she
was afraid to bend her hcad,.l suppose, for
fear of some kiad of a downfall.
I went home, pondering in my heart these
words of the preacher--Vanity, vanity, all
is vanity."
The Strength of a Kind. Word.
How strong is a kind word ! It. will do
what the harsh word or even blow cannot do;
it will subdue the stubborn will, relax the
frown, and works wonders. •
Even the dog, the cat, or the horse,though
they do not know what you say,oun tell when
you speak a kind word to them.
A man was one day driving a cart along
the street. The horse was drawing a heavy
load, and did not turn as the man wished
him to.do. The man was in an ill temper,
and beat the horse. The horse reared and
plunged, but be either did not or would not
go the right way. Another man, who was
in a cart, went up to - th•e • horse and patted
him on the neck and called him kindly by
his name. The horse turned his head; and
fixed his large eyes ,on the man, as though
he would say, "I will do anything for you,
because you are kind to ne," and bending
his broad chest against the.lead, be turned
the curt down the narrow, lane, and trotted
on briskly, as though the load were a play
thing.
Oh, how strong is a kind word !
I=ll
It is said that in Now South Wales an old
maid.is a much rarer animal than: a blank
swan. It is asserted that the fair Cmigtants
from England receive offers of marriage titre'
speaking trumpets before they land (rum the
skips; and if she accepts the proposal, she
si , ruides holding up the Anger .. on which
tab; expects the wedding ring to be „placed
A_surgodiw_b_o_was_baltiovits
, .
wil.7.Alter bantering him a considerable
time, tle doctor said : "Yon see how bald
I ,lint '
,' and yet I don't wear a wig?"-•."True,
sir,' leplied theiserwant s -obutarremptylcarn
inquires no thatch ",.
Patent bone - crusbing erictohinos.
road trains.'
Preamble and. Resolutions
Proposed by Rev. L, J. Bell, and discussed
at a General Temperance Meeting held in
Leitersburg, Md., June 7, 1866.
Whereas, by reason of man's fall from
God, there is in human nature a craving af
ter something which mankind of itself does
not possess, and
Whereas, human-nature is a compound of
two parts (animal and spiritual) which-parts
seperately & in their combination, possess and
manifest susceptibilities, inclinations, propel].
sities, iliElßiooB and ap setites which crave
-r - -
gratification, and often, in spite of knowl
edge,. reason, judgment, conscience, waroing,l
advice and resolution, will and must have
gratification, when that gratification is known
to, tend to mischievous results or is at best of
doubtful propriety, -and
iminoper—un--of----articles-of—a
.
Jod and drink lead generally to the most
pernicious consequences, this meeting puts
on record these five following deliberate Res
olutions,
Resolved. That all rational human beings
should seek, or- be pursuaded to seek, tie_.
I==
or. as t e elue goo., w• o on y, throng
his son, our sole mediator, and the Divine
spirit, can satisfy every want.of the sodl, and
bring everything pertaining to body and
mind into happy submission to his will, which
is evermore conformed to gis own attributes
of infinite Wihdom, Goodness and Truth.
Resolved, That subordinate• to the provi
sions of Religion, and for the purpose of ex
cluding lustful thoughts and desires for bod
ily or sensual gratifications, attention is due
to various means calculated to awaken and
foster a sense of honor and self-respect and
an appreciation of the pure, beautiful and
exhilarating. among the products of human
genius and in the universe of God's creation;
and, that chief among these means, stand
iucentives to the formation of habits of in
dustry and beneficence, of . love for home
- pie asuresTwholes e - re - a - dienr, an d - th e stu y
of nature.
Resolved, That the Christian Church, be
ing designed and established for the highest
good 'of all mankind, and having an ever
I __ present _ Divine_ Head;—reasorr-of-th-e
-laws and encouragements which He has giv
en it, the best and the only sufficient organ
ization, when pure in faith and practice, for
securing Temperance, Virtue and Holiness
amongst its meat bership, and that when such_
membership is sufficiently numerous, it can
be:relied upon as a power sufficient for mould
ing, restraining and preserving the mass of
mankind outside of its pale, thug constitu
ting in itself the best society for Temperance
and Beneficial purposes.
Resolved, That the substitution, in the
church's place, of any worldly organization
outside of and independent" of it, for moral
reform or for any purpose, ought to be view
ed as a mere temporary expedient, to be en
couraged only until the Christian Church
can be brought up to an enlarged view of Ju.
ty and the fulfilment of its obligations and
that in no case should it be supplanted by
any outside organization, no matter how hu.
mane and scriptural its rules and inculcations
may be.
Resolved, That it is highly desirable that
the Christian Church, in all its branches and
congregations, should pay. more especial at.
tention to preventing and remedying the e•
vils of gluttony and drunkenness within its
own pale and in the world around, and that
the church is in a position most effectually
to increase its power for good,. by systemati
cally developing, in all its, membership, the
graces of moderation, brotherly kindness and,
universal philanthrophy, derived from Him
"who went about doing good," and which,
by reason of the dereliction of the church,
has been made a• special attraction by,sun
dry temperance and beneficial orders, who:
adherents are banded together to help each
other.
Resolved, That'auxiliaries to the church,
subordinate organizations, noting in concert
with the church, and nut in contempt of it,
ought to be approver] and eneouracr ° ed, espe
cially such associations as •have for their
main (Neat the promotion of Temperance
and general morality; and that the following
are good proofs of the truth of these propo
sitions, viz:—
(a) The sad fact, shown by experience,
that as a rule, the church, or the aggregate
of Christian congregations, has always been
obliged to leave out of its fold a' very large
proportion, say the mass of the community,
because they would sot heartily enter in.
(b) The mournful fact that Christians, as
a mass, lite other people, are slow to under
stand the nature and preventives of the sin
of intemperance,—ate apt to underrate its
heinousness, and to be influenced by early
education in communities in which indul
gence in intoxicating drink, is called iono•
cent gratification and the drink itself a good
creature of God.
(c)• The fact that the numerical strength
and aggressive Circe of Christian conorega
tionshowever proper their morals and
plino, are very seldom sufficient to counter
act the formation of habits which lead to sur
feiting and drunkenness, in the community,
inasmuch 'as nonprofossors may a•d m fire
church rules, without feeling bound by them.
(d) The fact that a portion of the teach
ings of religion may be borrowed and so 'pop
ularized and inculcated as to resell multi
tudes whom the church 'does not directly
ben . cfit.
,
A yonog pan in Newport:Vl", wanted a
wife hadly,And 'took "a young lady Out to
ride. After Oroeeeding.a fow lie'ask
lvCh_e_r, "Will youmarry_inhei , " -
W,Tri—
es`short as ir was swept: ~”No, sir 1"--
Young . gent says "Nell, get out; sod *go
thoine afoot; iheo."%fhe youog lady icoeg•
ted lik.adviook_and reached-home in--safety,
- Nice - yoffig nl4ll ititak i t.„ . - -•
•
, .;
Irishtnai pretest!: against 'the extbn 7
sled 'of` the' suffrage in Dela ad '= 'Be s4BllB
poor eiyintry has suffered toe much already.
Hidden Treasure Brought to Light
The Dyersburg (Tenn.) Gazette of the '
26th ult. says:
A short time before our civil war threw
its lurid light over the land, an unmarried
man moved from Mississippi to this county,
and settled at a place a few miles from Dyers
burg, and commenced the quiet but prosper
ous life of a farmer. When a call was made
for troops he abandoned his occupation and
enlisted as a soldier in the confederate army,
and was killed in one of• the battles in Mis
sissippi. Being almost an entire_strangatin_
the county, nothing was known of his family
sr-affairs. At the close of the war, his place
was cultivated by a Mr. Wilson.
•A short time since durin7 the cold Reath-_
er, a negro of Captain Hall's went on the
place to cut a "back log," which be did.—
hi-placing it on the-fir9-11e-recoarked tliut it
was the heaviest log for its size he ever lif't-
ed. The fire burin mg 11.7,77 mem y,
and in a short time a stream of yellow lava
commenced running on ilia h_ca,rtit,=whielt,
.
proved to be melted gold. We learn' that
the _old all of whiel was not melte_ •%,1-
poun i is and is still in possession
of the fortune finder. It is supposed that
the Mississippian, on entering the army,
stowed his gold away in the log for s..fe keep-
A Bov STRUCK Burin.—The Brighton
(England) Observer relates a ease where the
vengeance of the Almighty was visited on a
youth named Richards. The youth was
thirteen years of age, and bad been playing
for some time with his companions, when a
dispute arose between them as to 'notches'
'or jumps Richard -bad scored. He declared
that be had made more than twenty, and his
opponents protested• that he had not made
so many. High words and bad language
were freely used on both sides. Each boy
accused the other Of falsehood, and at length
Richatds_faiting'-to-eauvince-hiS-companiona
of the truthfulness of his statement, flew in
to a violent rage and emphatically shouted,
"Alay,God strike me blind if 1 hav'nt made
more than twenty." Ile had Scarcely utter
ed,-the-adjuration before be let the "dog"
fall out of his hands, and throwing up his
arms, exclaimed, "Oh, dear, I cannot see."
His companion ran to him, and finding what
he said was true, at his request led him
home; where, on examination, it was found
that a thick film had overspread each of .his
eyes. In this miserable condition the un
happy youth has remained ever since, and
we are informed that there is little prospect
of his sight being restored.
.10 IN,
PERPETUAL Mono:.—Josh tolls us how
he got said': '.When I was down to the
fair, a good many years ago, there was a
prize offered to the one who would come the
nearest to making perpetual motion. Well,
all sorts of machines, of all shapes and ma
terials, were fetched there, and shown, and
the makers of them told bow long they would
run. As I was walking among them, I seen
a sign over a tent : "All who want to see
perpetual motion, and no mistalee, meet here."
. 8o I paid the admission fee, and went in.
Very soon•a queer little man got up on a
box that served for a platform, and address
ed the audience. "Ladies and' gentlemen,"
he said, "I'm a goite to exhibit to you the
most wonderfulest invention you ever seen.
It bas been runnin' for full three years, and,
If nobody stops it, it'll run forever." And
here ho unrolled a long strip of paper.:---
"Phis is a tailor's Lill!" And, as he bold
it up• to the gaze of the people, they admit
ted, that, whether" the bill was ever paid or
not, they had all been sold.
A MELANCHOLY CONFESSION. —Some of
our renders have probably often read Bul
wer's Novels.. In a letter recently to a per.
son in Boston, Mass., Bulwer himself says :
"I have run my cnrreer as a writer of fiction
and lam gloomy and unhappy. I have ex•
haunted the powers of life chasing pleasure
where it is not to be found." If such be
the fruits of his labors upon the author him
self, how, can they be different upon' the rea•
der ? If the writing of such works as flow
ed from his pen has left him gloomy and un•
happy when far advanced in life, and near
ing the grave and . the realities of eternity,
how can it be-expected,that the reading of
his works will produce any better fruits ?
Reader, will you venture to try it ? Oh, is
there not enough of the REAL in time and
eternity to make one seek to avoid the ficti
tious—nod that especially when one of its
very writers says as the end of the whole
matter, "I ant gloomy ani unhappy ?"
'WHY ONE SHOULD NOT SwEAR.—An ar
ticle in the Pittsburg Preacher gives seven
good reasons why a man should not swear.
1. It is mean. A man of high moral
standing would almost as soon steal a sheep
as swear. 2.. It is vulgar—altogether too
low for u decent man. 3 It is cowardly—
implying a fear either of not being
,believed
or obeyed. 4. It is ungentlemanly. A gen
tleman, according to Webster, is a genteel
man-:-.well bred, refined. Such a one will
no more swear than go into the street to
throw mud with a loafer. 5. It -is indecent
-'—offensive to delicacy, and cstremelrurip.i
for human ears.' 6 It is foolish. `'"Want
of decency is want of sense" -7. It is abu-,
bive—to the mind which .concives itd
An Irishman used to come home, often
drunk, and once when :he - was ' :watering-his,
horse, his wife said to him, !'NowcPaddy;
isn't that bilrate:an example to yo? • itcin!:t you
: :e-that-hii-laveseif-when-he-has-had-enin
of the cralturl, --He's the' most sensible baste
of_ the two.":-it's.very well to discourse
like that, Hiddy,"-,oried
was - anotherhorse4644e other side: of f ; tilt
trough ,to say, • illere's your healtlii me,044 .
bps!' • 'would he'stop, till he, drank 4ka whit!fi f ,
trough; think. ye?", • .„, • •
What. le *irsr kave . rd (j,)
r:.i
ismbla Im!Wiar 'Vasty-
4 fashionable But ignorant lady, delirious
of, purchasing a Watch, was ,shown a • very
beautiful one, the shop-keeper , remarking
that it Went'thirty.six hours : " What, in one
day? alikask"od.
'A Story i's"told'Of a very eminent . lawyer
in New York receiving a scvere reprimand
from a witness ob the stand whom iie 'was
attempting to-bio*beat. It was 'necessary
that Mr. A— should impeach the Witness.
He endeavored to do it on the ground of
'age. The following dialogue ensued
r
‘l3eventy.two years., •
'Yottr memory, of course, is not So brilli
ant as it was.twenty years ago , is it ?'
"Ldon't know bit it is,'
'State some circumstances which occur
red, say twelve years ago, and we shall be a
ble to see hew well you remember.' .
appeal to your honor ; if I am to be in
• s t ated in ilijErtirunrm. - it-h3Ausolent4L- -
'Yes, sir; state it,' said the Judge.
will. About twelve years ago you studied
i n t y d • h ' • •
•. . .
'Yes.' -
'Well, "sir, I remeinber your father coming
into my office'and saying to rue : 4 1.51 r:
my son is to bee)miniiied to•morrow, and I
wish you would lend tie fifteen dollars to
buy him a suit of clothing.' I remember
also, sir, that from that day to this, be has
never paid me• that sum. That,:air, I re
member as though it bad been but yester
day.
The lawyer said ;. considerably abashed :
.'That will do, 'sir; to wbicli the witness
replied—
'l presume it will.
CAUGHT THE LITTLE teacher in
one of the primary schools "at Brookfield,
lowa, the other day, foutid among leis list of
juveniles one who was constant! envirz •
time .
some wise to ; and at the same, t was giv
en to swearing. ITaving uttered an oath in
violation of the teacher's rules, be ordered
the aforesaid juvenile to take his place iu
one corner of the old rickety schoul-house,
and, placing a- pair of old-fashioned iron
tongues in his . hand, ordered him to watch
a hole in the floor until he should catch a
mouse, supposing this would be a great pun
ishment. The little - urchin gazed steadily as
the aperture, - iwhile_the-teacher r with-hia-face---
turned from him,, was engaged with the oth
er scholars. At last he heard the tongs go
bang! He turned his eyes quickly the
youth, who, with .a Countenance beaming
with excitement, yelled, "Teacher, ye got
the littM cuss!" and, true „enough, he had
Mister Mouse fast by the head.
THE NEWS.-- , Mjko I say, Pat, have 'ye
heard the, news.from, ould. Ireland ?
Pat—what news; 1%1 - Hie ?
Mike—Ould Habeas Corpus has been sus
pended.
Pat—The_.devil. , :he has—did he die ai
sey •
Alike—Divil a bit—an' ten million bound
Fenian boys is AmrikY resurriet him
Pat—Och !that they will. Hurrah for
ould Ireland 4.lod•bless her,
and 'the Green,'
too. What? we'll suspend ould England
higher tban she ever did poor ould "nab:lash
Corpus !"
A woman being enjoined to try the el leer
of kindness on her husband, and being told
that it would 'heap coals of fire on his head,
replied that she had tried "•bilin' water," and
it didn't do a bit of good. She was rather
doubtful about the.eflicaey of "coals."
A clergyman on orrc occasion reeeived no
fee for marrying a parsimonious couple, and,
meeting them several months after in a so
cial gathering, took up the baby and ex
elaitned:'"l believe I have k mortgage on
this child!" Baby's father, rather than have
an explanation before the company, quietly
banded over a $5 bill.
A countryman Bias charged with ten gat
lone of whiskey which a "grocer pat in an
eight gallon keg, said' he •'didn't mind the
money overcharged's° much as he did the
strata on the keg.'r-
Ml====l
The age of a yontiglady is now expressed
according to the prelont,style of hoop-skirts,
by saying plat,, ,, seighteensprings have pass
ed over her 141.'
=MMI'M
The people of Wist :Virginia have, by a
great tuajorith.voted to disfranchise all rob.
els, tbeirsympatbixers and eiders and abet
tors. No limitatieti has been fixed, so that
it is probable -that th; ettree' that .
upon the torierof the Revoliticse ttillbelaa•
toned upon the traitors through all timeo.,•
..„
. Sir Walter - Scott; . in lending a 'book Ono
day to a friend cautioned him to he'punctu
alin returning it. "This is really peeessa
ry," said the. poet in .apology;_ "f4r, though
many of my friends are b . ad arithmeticians,
I 'observe almost all of them are good book
keepers. - • .
What letters iire'aiost 'impOrtattt•tO our-
Selves t---U '
Calhoun county,, Illinois; must be, a hard
place. A Presboorian.ruinieter from there
stated in"a Tainting of the Prishjrtery t h at
ho nonlittidt fificf ni the Whole conittry &ban
ifit to• bor.inelderfirt the
Neither iitse_oual, lals.OZe
Ye% Jtr! , aft.
_ S v . (qv'
tied il/tditieste 7 itlthitieta
4,0 h neon, $ ekellenivilimet Clhaliiiix,reg—
reeented ,14 cl tikejdheg..gte4tep
robale;!
I.o'o
7 1r) - 1
The infe
mvus high, price - uflseam, -
BER 1
ei nor
qfk iPi3891e!.3.