J)XPt.
(li)lMLUJl tl
Office 11 102
C sir. re
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VOL V1T.
3I1LF01H), PIKE COUNTY, PA., FRIDAY, JULY 4, 1902.
NO.
( i ' V a
THE WASHINGTON LETTER.
Rapid progress was made lust
week in congress and today t tin only
mutter which stands in I ho way of
ml join iimenr, is tho Philippine hill,
which is still in conference. When
the Philippine bill came to a vote,
on Thursday evening, it passed the
house by a strict, party vote, only
one republican voting with tin; dem
ocrats. Friday and Saturday con
ferences were In-Ill between ths! rep
resentatives of the senate hiuI th
house nnil several of tlio provisions
ot the hill were so filtered as to meet
tin) approval of both parties. The
two provisions of the bill which
present the greatest iliflicnlties are
thoso dealing with this currency
question nnd the local government
of the islands. The house conferees
have go far insisted on n gold stand
nid for tlio islands and tlio senate
conferees insist, upon tlio silver pro
vision, which passed the senate
without, division Tho" represent
tivesof tlio house also believe that
their course in establishing a Phil
ippine legislature, is to he preferred
to the senate's more tentative pro
vision that a census sh.ill he taken
with a view to the establishment,
nt. sonio Biilweqner.t date, of such
legislature There is. hoivever, a
general disposition on tlio part of
the conferrees to meet each other
half way and the more sanguine
lead era predict that all differences
will be met in time to permit, of ad
journment tomorrow noun, while
otb.ers set the date of adjournment
03 the 3d of July.
The earnest effort of Senator Quay
to secure action on the omnibus ter
ritorial bill has met with partial suc
cess inasmuch as the 10th of De
cember has been set for the consid
eration ( f the bill in the senate and
tlio senate committee on territories
lias been authorized to moot to con
sider the bi'.l during the summer re
cess.
The conferees on the isthmian
canal bill did not take long to come
to an agreement and now the Spoon
er bill requires only the signature
of the president to become a law.
Senator Morgan tells me that he
considers the prospects of a canal
better than they have ever been be
fore in the history of the agitation,
notwithstanding the fact that the
Panama route has been chosen.
One day last week the senate
passed the bill providing for the es
tabliubinont of the Appalachian for
est reserve and the measure has
been Hpproved by the house com
mittee on agriculture and will be
reported, for action next session
The bill carries a total appropriation
of tin,ooo,ooo.
The senate has passed the general
deficiency bill, including appropria
tions of $."00 000 towards meeting
the deficit of the Buffalo exposition,
and $160,000 towards the deficit of
the Charleston exposition. The bill
also appropriates $45,000 to pay the
expenses ottendidg the last illness
of President McKinley.
Representative Woods of Califor
nia recently expressed to me his ex
treme satisfaction at the outcome of
the Cuban reciprocity agitation,
saying that the refusal of congress
to sacrifice, tho Iveet sugar prod Dears
to a sentimental regard for tho
Cubans would go f ir to insure the
success of the republican party in
bis state. Mr. Woods believes that
the full complement of republican
Congressmen will be returned from
California, whereas, he asserts, such
Would not have been the c.i.se had
the Cub:In bill passed. Speaking of
reciprocity iu general, Mr. Woods
said that many leading republicans
had been sadly milled on the sub
ject ; that the reciprocity udvocuted
by Blaine contemplated only the ex
tension of the trade of the United
Suites with the countries of South
America nnd t ho reciprocity advo
cated by McKinley expressly pro
vided Ihut concessions were to be
made only on products which were
not produced at home.
I have jast received news from
Koine, Alaska, which reveals an
other chapter in the story of cor
Miptlon that bus already made a
tr.ivcMy of justice iu that judicial
district and adds another link to the
chain of evidence of un organized
C ne piracy to debauch the United
r-fat-s i---rts. Tim tad 4--ry of
,iu 1 -.i :;. s is si.:i 1,,-sh in the
Ii i..'.s ,,' lie jciMif, the u:i A'u! f ilit
t i c !. v u ) l-v the Ut.;'.i d S-.(at.-
court ot appeals of the ninth dis- I
trict, and the subsequent pardoning j
by the president, of young Claude
A S. Frost, are but matters of yes
terday. The strenuous efforts made '
by certain interested parties to se- I
cure the permanent appointment of
Jud;o Wiekorsham to the Nome
federal bench have hardly ceased
and now corner the news that Unit
ed St ites Mirshul Richards, who
doubtlessly refused, as did young
Frost, to he p irty to the malevolent
schemes of the Pacific coast conspir
ators, his been arreste 1 on the
charge of contempt of court, ccn
victol of "packing a ji'ry" on the
evidence of detectives said to bo in
league with the ring, and is now
awaiting the sentence of the court.
It. is hardly necessary to add that i
Wickersham is the judge who con
victed Richards n or to emphasize
the fact that by bringing tlio charge
of "contempt of court" the judge
found a nDaus of cinvicting with
out giving to the m irh il the bene
fit of a trial by jury.
Fortunately, however, the men
who have sought, to pervert jjstico
to their own ends have overreached
themselves, and the president, has
grasped tho situation- nnd taken
steps to remedy it. Despite tlio
pressure brought to bear on him to
make Wicket-sham's nomination
permanent, Mr. Roosevelt, has ap
pointed his sueeo-Hor in the person
of Mr. J. S. Moore of Pennsylvania,.
who is now en route for Nome.
Judge Moore is a inin of nnnnes-
tioned probity and had the tndorse-
muut of Attorney Genera) Knox
and of Senator Qny. Mr. It vise.
velt, has also appointed as United
States attorney for the Nome dis
trict Colonel Gngsby, formerly of
the Rough Riders, and it is safe to
anticipate that the presence of these
two men of unquestioned honor anil
unlimited courage will remedy a
condition ot affairs in the Nome dis
trict. which has been a blot on the
judicial system of the nation, and it
is not too much to hnpo that they
will succeed in disrupting the in
famous ting which has done so
much to m ike Nome justice a cari
cature and a by-word.
Real Estate Transfers.
Philip F. Counterman to Egypt
Mills club, fishing rights on Toms
creek, Lehman.
Harry J. Atkinson to John S.
O'Connor, 3 acres, Palmyra, $100.
Martin Hat ton to George Retallic
58 acres, Delaware, $320.
Commonwealth to David McKean,
patents, 65 acres and 79 acres,
Shohola.
David McKean to' Warren Mc
Kean, 79 acres, Shohola, part of
Samuel Insco, No. 149, $2.
O. Frank Rowland, treasurer, to
James Conwell, 208 acres, Dingman,
taxes.
"Iho Hound of the Baskervillee."
Sherlock Homes greatest piece of
detective work is done in the new
story by Dr. A. Oman Doyle, "The
Mound of the Baskervillos." Holmes
himself says to Watson, his co
worker. "Here at last is A foetnan
worthy of our Bteel." The result
is a story which, for thrilling inter
est, stands by itself. From the first
discovery of the hound's trail, when
the dried up young doctor brings to
Sherlock Holmes the ancient manu
script, to the final scene where the
great detective is brought face to
face with the monster of the moor
land, there is not a sentence that
does not carry the reader breath
lessly forward. It is a great novel,
with a great subject, by a master of
tho craft. This thrilling story be
gins in "The Philadelphia Press"
Sunday, July 6. lie sura not to
miss it. 8-1-02
Teacher Employed.
Tho directors Monday evening en-ga-ed
teachers as follows for thu
e-uning year :
Principal, John C. WdUou, salary
t'iO.
Intermediate, D. II. llornbeck,
$10.
1st primary, Louise Klaer, $oh1.
2,1 primary, Lizzie Rochotte, $30.
S.diocopee, Jennie Struthers, $30.
Janitor, U. K. Steele.
A Poor Millionaire.
Lately starve 1 in London because
ne coin, 1 not ilig.-st lit to.nl. t-irly !
.
use of Dr. King's New Life Pills
would have saved him. They
strengthen the htotmlch, aid ilies-
". .n, piniic te Hs-iiiiilatiou, improve
! ; lite Price 2.V. Money hack
if not but flic J. S .11 by alt drug-'
i;'-rs.
PERSONALS
Capt. C II. Cooke of New York
vas in town recently on his way to
Dingumn's Ferrv.
j Mrs. Qninn of New York, former
ily Miss Nellie McNicholl, is visiting
in town this week.
Mrs. Thomas Rodman 'of Now
Hampton, N. Y., is spending a few
days with friends in town.
Miss Mary Wells is In very ill
health and her condition hardly
warrants expectation of recovery.
A. V. McCurty of Dingnnin town
ship suffered a stroke paralysis lust
w eek nnd is now entirely helpless.
Milts ('. Rowland of Klinbles was
in town Monday. He was accom
panied by Mr. Ilea, a land agent for
the Krie.
The boys of Camp Yupeeehu under
the care of Prof. (!cu. Wilson are
again located on the farm of J. C.
Hull in the tow iiship.
Mrs. John I). Biddis and daugh
ters, Helen and Putty of Washing
ton, 1). C, arrived in town this week
for llieir summer vacation.
Mrs. Anna B. Nichols spent n
couple of days tl is week visiting
Mrs. Dr. J. C. Price in Branchville.
She returned yesterday in company
with Miss Beitha Williamson and
Miss Susan Nichols, who drove over
for her.
Over fifty boys under Major;
Hyde of New York are cainping up
on the turnpike. They inarched
through the street Tuesday in
martial style full uniformed nnd
accoutred and looked like a lot of
healthy chaps who will have a good
time.
Mr. Rutherford, an architect from
Scranton, was in town last week
looking over the property recently
bought by Dr. C. W. Roberts with a
view to milking plans for such im
provements and changes as may be
requisite for the business of giving
chemical baths.
Charles D. Loreitux, formerly a
resident here but now engaged with
tho Keystone watch company in
Philadelphia, is visiting friends in
town, his first return iu twenty-two
years. Time has not dealt unkind
ly with him and beyond a little
more frost on his head he appears
the same as of yore. It is a pleas
ure to have those whom we knew
years ago return and give the hearty
band shake.
Congress has provided for a com
mission to secure plans alid designs
for a monument or memorial to be
erected to the memory of Abraham
Lincoln, which is to be a magnificent
affair, worthy of that great man.
The commission Is to consist of the
chairman of the senate library com
mittee, the chairman of the house
library committee, the secretary of
state, the secretary of war, Senator
Vest and Represenative Richardson.
It is an open question whether Mr.
Bryan's or Mr. Watterson's arraign
ment of Mr. Cleveland's "harmony"
speech was the most severe. Each
of these gifted editors, without going
beyond the bounds of parliamentary
language, called the sage of Prince
ton everything bud from a party
standpoint, which could jiossibly
have been thought of by a dozen
ordinary orators. Mr. Cleveland's
political offenses, they state, have
placed him outside of the bounds of
any possible claim to true Democracy.
When Representative Cham) Clark
was making a speech in congress the
other day a republican representative
innocently inquired whether ho hud
read Mr. Bryan's remarks on Kx
Presiucnt Cleveland's "harmony"
talk at the Tilden Club. Mr. Clark
replied that lie would not answer any
such impertinent questions, which
was followed by loud roars of repub
lican laughter, the democrats mean
while appearing us glum as clams.
Seiiiih.r Quay has obtained unani
mous consent that on the 10th of De
cember next the omnibus btutchood
bill, including Oklahoma, New Mex
ico nnd Arizona, shall be made the
unfinished business of the senate and
continued as such until disposed of.
This means statehood for those terri
tories. You assume no risk when you buy
Chamberlain's Colic, Cholera and
Diarrhoea Remedy. A. W. Baleh
A Son. Mat.imoras. all drm; and
general stores in Pike countv will
i
. refund your money if you are not
j satisfied after using it. It is every,
j where admitted to he the most sue
Cesstul remedy iu usj for bowel
'complaints nnd the only one that
never tail.--. It is pleasant, safe a;id
'n-liuUo. 10-31
TRUSTEES ELECT FACTJLTT.
Prof. E. L Kemp Made Principal
of Normal School A Man
of Great Ability.
At tho meeting Thursday after
noon of the trustees of the state
normal school, In Kust Stroudsburg,
Prof. Kllwood L. Kemp, A. M., was
elected principal of the school.
Prof. Kllwood L. Kemp, the newly
elected principal of the state normal
school, was born at Hamburg, Berks
county, Pennsylvania, in 157. He
attended the public school of his
native town until nearly sevnteen
years of nge. Then he followed a
varied program for about five' years,
part of that time being a silk butter's
apprentice and the balance of the
time he worked in a steel rolling
mill and on a truck farm.
Prof. Kemp's first attempt at
school teaching was in 1S"8, when he
secured a position as teacher In (he
schools at Orwlgsburg, Schuylkill
county, not far from his native
home. -He taught there for two
years and privately prepared for col
lege In that time, entered tho junior
class of Franklin and Marshall Col
lege and graduated at the head of.
his class in 1881.
lie was elected professor of Latin
and Greek in the Keystone state norm
al school at Kutztown, the vehr of
his gradation 'from college. After
holding that position for two years
he was elected to teach psychology,
pedagogy and literature iu the same
institution. After serving five years
In that professorship he left, thp
Keystone state normal school to take
charge of Wichita University, at
Wichita, Kansas.
Ho was at the head of that uni
versity for throe years. Then he
was elected principal of tho Palatin
ate college at Meyerstown and after
remaining there two years be was
elected vioe principal of the state
normal sohobl at East Stroudsburg
when it was opened and has pecu
bied that chair ever since.
Professor Kemp has done much
good work in lecturing and instruct
ing at institutes in Pennsylvania,
New Jersey and Kansfls.
In 1886 he was ordained a minister
in the Reformed church and served
two mission churches in Kansas in
connection with bis duties in the
University at Wichita.
Professor Kemp is the author of a
volume of poems and of a history of
education. Tho history of education
was published by J. B. Lippincott &
Company. The company is now pre
paring to publish a second edition of
the work. The book has been
adopted by a number of large nor
mal schools on the Pacific coast as
well as iu the east and for the train
ing schools of a number of large
cities.
The trustees made no mistake in
electing Professor Kemp to succeed
Prof. Geo. P. Bible as the head of
the state normal school of East
Stroudsburg. He is a mau of broad
and liberal views and there is not
the least doubt that the school mil
prosper under his administration as
it never has before.
Todays Races.
The entries for the races at the
driving park today are as follows:
FltKK-KOH-AI.t..
Kgdale, llornbeck, Port Jervis.
Major ('., Carr, Goshen.
Anita T., Donahue, Port Jervis.
Jozeba, Bundle, Montague.
1 Olia, Demurest, Goshen.
2.35 class.
Friday, Heath, Goshen.
Topsy ()., Kyle, Milford.
Dewey, Stearns, Poit Jervis.
STfK'KIIOI.DKllS.
Prince R., Armstrong, Milford.
Jaybird, Thornton, Milford.
Lizzie McCoy, Bourmque, Millord.
Frank W., Rundlc, Montague.
Duo., Kenworthey, Milford.
Should todiy, - Friday, prove
stormy the races will be postponed
until tomorrow.
It Dazzles the World.
No diacovery in inedieino has ever
created one quarter of the excite
ment that has been caused by Dr.
King's New Discovery for Consump
tion. It's severest tests have been
on hopeless victims of consumption,
pneumonia, hemorrhage, pleurisy,
bronchitis, thousands of whom it
has restored to perfect health. For
coughs, colds, asthma, liny fever,
croup, hoarseness and whooping
cough it is the quickest, surest cure
in the world. It is sold by all drug
gists who guarantee (satisfaction or
refund money. Laryo bottles 50o
nnd $1. Trial bottles free.
BRIEF MENTION.
John M Aldricu is about, com
pleting a substantial and cosy resi
dence on his farm near town.
Dogs killed two sheep nnd badly
wounded a third In the flock of John
C Heck at Schoeopoe rnst Suniley.
A party of eight young men passed
through town Tuesday to their camp
ing grounds near L. W. Quick's in
Delaware.
The Union party will hold a con
vention iu Philadelphia Sept. 3 to
give an opportunity for expressing
views on the question of nominating
a ticket for slate officers
Those VYnltons who indulge in
trout fishing have not been, with
some few exceptions, very lucky
tecently. The catches have been
small and so have the fish.
Tho town council with very com
mendable judgment improved the
streets this week by mending cul
verts arjd gutters so as to carry off
the water. Street Commissioner
Steele had the work in charge.
Grether has been returned to the
Monroe county jail and argument
on bis motion for a new trial was
had Monday. Aiollo, the Italian,
waived the motion for a new trial.
Both enses will bo disposed of by
Judge Heydt July 12.
Some of the local horseymen are
betting largely on the races today
and are lavishly putting up what
they have the most of, hot. air.
Several thousand dollars worth of
that substantial commodity was re
cently slaked here in one evening.
Quail are reported quite pl'iitiful
In some sections hereabouts. The
past winter, especially some of the
Inter snows, were destructive to the
birds but a goodly number survived
and the cheerful whistle bob white
can be heard in almost every direc
tion. It is reported that 150 guests re
cently arrived at the Forest Park
Hotel in Lehman and that the house
will be filled this summer to its ut
most capacity. The D. V. li. R. no
doubt Is one of the prominent factors
in the renewed prosperity of that sec
tion of the county.
Charles B. MoCarty, proprietor,
will givo the opening dance of this
season at the popufur R lymondskill
Falls Wednesday evening, July 9.
The music be furnished bv
Bauer's Port Jervis orohestra.
There will be an opportunity to en
joy a very pleasant time.
At the republican primaries tor
Monroe county held last Saturday
the following ticket was nominated :
Associate judge, T. Y. Huffman ;
prothonotary, Robert Sebring : reg.
ister, etc, C. W. Tidd ; treasurer,
J. C. Kennedy : commissioner. J.
U. Fellencer ; auditor, Stewart Bit-
teubeudor.
King Edward, though not beyond
danger from his recent illness, i&
improving and appears now to bo
reasonably sure of recovering.
There is general rejoicing in Eng.
land at the favorable turn and the
sympathy of this country so olosely
allied to that over which he is king
goes out in full measure of gratitude
for his favorable condition.
Prof. (ieo. P. Bible, who bus been
piincipal of the Fast Stroudsburg
state normal school since its opening.
has been retired by the trustees and
is succeeded by Prof. E. L. Kemp.
Prof. Bible has been painstaking and
perserving and the school under his
management has attained remarkable
success. It is hoped that his success
or will be equally tortunate in the
conduct of its affairs.
At the recent annual election of a
faculty for the state normal school
at Fast Stroudsburg, Pa., Prof. K. L.
Kemp, for thu past nine years the ef
ficie it vice principal of that progres
sive institution, was chosen principal
to supersede (ieo. P. Bible. Prof.
Kemp has a wide reputation aa a
brilliant scholar, excellent teacher
and popular author. All communi
cations to the school should be ad
dressed to E. L. Kemp, A. M.,
Principal.
Th Best Liniment for Strains.
Mr. F. H. Wells, the merchant at
Deer Park, Long Island, N. Y.,
says: "I always recommend Cham
berlain's Pain Balm as the best lini
ment for strains. I used it lust win
ter ior a severe lameness in the side
resulting from a strain and was
gra!y pleased with the quick relief
and cure it effected." For sale by
A. W. Baleh & Sou, Matamoras, all
drug and general stoics in Piko
county,
The Weather Lat Year and Now.
There was a striking contmst be
tween the weather last year nnd this
around the latter part of June and
the first few days In July. Lust year
people were sweltering with heat
with the thermometer standing far
up in the nineties while this year
overcoats and heavy wraps were not
uncomfortable. Lust year the hot
spell broke nil records nnd caused
hundreds of deaths. As marking
more distinctly the contrast, In June
1!02, their was a deficiency of 43
degrees while lust year their was an
xccess of 27. The excessive ruins of
the past few days have been general
and very damaging to crops. In
some places in this stale crops were
washed out of the ground. It may
be of interest to recall that the weath
er of 1810 was phenomenal. In Muy
of that year the medium temperature
was 07. Cold, frosty weather pre
vailed, ice frequently formed, corn
was replanted two or three times and
little came to perfection. In June
the medium temperature was 64.
One morning vegetables were
frozen, snow fell from 0 to 10 inches
In Vermont and 3 in central New
York. Fruit was wholly destroyed.
In July the medium temperature
was only lis. One frosty night was
succeeded by another and July 6th
their was Ice ns thick ns a window
glass in this state. The medium
temperature for the whole year was
III. Ice formed every month in the
year mid it was the year iu which
there was no summer nnd is known
as eighteen huiKlied-nnd-freeze-me-to-deaih.
OBITUARY
I.'li HARD W. HOFFMAN.
Probably the oldest man in this
county and one who in his day and
generation was a prominent factor
in its nffuirs passed away Sunday in
Dingniiui township when Mr. Hoff
man after f he years given to but
few entered into his rest.
He was born at Mt. Salem, New
Jersey, April rt, 1814, and was a son
of Z icliariah W. and Hannah Dennis
Hoffman, both members of old and
respected families. In 1840 he re
moved to this county and located
near Sa wkill pond, in which vicin
ity he has since resided engaged in
farming. His good judgment and
practical common sense were recog
nized by the people of his township
who elected him to noarly every
local office in their gift and ho was
for fifteen years a justice of the
pence. He also served as oounty
commissioner for three years from
18fi9 to 1872 and was active in build
ing the new court house. He was
twice married but both his wives
are long since dead. Two children,
John M., ex-sheriff of the county,
with whom he lived, and Sarah J.,
wife of G. W. Chamberlain of Leh
man, (survive. The funeral was
held Tuesday nnd interment in the
upper cemetery near Milford.
Frank P. Sargent took the onth of
office, June 25, as Commissioner Gen
eral of Immigration, to succeed T. V.
Powderly.
The house and senate conferees are
agreed Uxin the Isthmian canal bill.
Senator Morgan, who has been al
ways the champion ot the Nicaragua
route, has advised the acceptance of
the Spooner substitute, which pro
vides for the Panama route if a satis
factory title can lie secured. This
will insure the digging of a canal.
Senator Morgan, however, believes
that the negotiations for the title of
the Panama route will fail, so that
ultimately the Nicaragua route will
have to be selected under the act.
The Republicans are more than
willing that the Democrats should
make an issue on the tariff. They
conclude that il will be hardly neces
sary to do more than to "stand pat"
on this proposition und let the oppo
sition convince the country, If it can,
that the calamitous limes of 180:1 and
the Wilson tariff were preferable to
the present prosperity.
White Tan Turned Yellow.
Great consternation was felt by
the friends of M A. Hogarty of
Lexington, Ky.. when they saw he
was turning yellow. Hif skin slow
ly changed color, also his eyes, and
he suffered terribly. His malady
was yellow jaundice. He was treat
ed by the best doctors, but without
benefit. Then he was advised to
try Electric Bitters, the wonderful
stomach and liver remedy, and he
writes: ' After taking two bottles I
was wholly cured." A trial proves
its matchless merit for all stomach,
liver and kidney troubles. Only 5ce.
THE RAMBLER'S PICKINGS.
The should be a borough ordinance
against the everlasting firing of rocket-,
crackers, etc. It Is a wonder
there are not more runaways caused
by careless boys.
We are not to have a celebration,
but there will lie enough doing to
keep alive on the Fourth. You can
have the pleasure of attending a pro
hibition basket picnic in the glen,
the races at the driving park, nnd in
the evening a dunce in Brown's hall.
Mrs. Edward Everitt of Fast
Orange visited friends here the past
week.
Mrs. Robt. Oliver, a former resi
dent of Milford but now of Montclnir,
N. J., visited friends here last Week.
Miss Mary Quick is now behind
the counter of the general store of T.
Armstrong A Co.
There is no occassion to grumble
about dry weather. It rains of late
about every other day and sure on
Sunday.
Delays are always dangerous.
Our postmaster now wears a broad
er smile than ever. He has a right
to feel proud.
The vicinity of Milford Is becoming
noted as a camping ground.
Where are the sons of sunny Italy?
Not one of them has made his ap
pearance so far this season.
A horse turned out on the road to
pasture near Dingmnns was thecause
of a smashed carriage, a young mnn
breaking an arm and a young lady
getting bruised? Question? Who is
responsible?
No doubt next Saturday there will
be a good deal of that tired feeling
also the usual number of burnt fingers
etc. But they belong to the ever
glorious Fourth.
JOHNNIE'S CELEBRATION.
I s'pose you've awl herd of tyin'
tin cans and firecrackers too dogs'
tails on the Forth but ile toll you
somethin' a great deal funnyer.
Last Forth i planned two have a
good time with the boys but 1 want
ed a solebrashnn awl tew myself
and pritty soon i thot of a good
wun. Forth of July mornin' i wuz
np long before brekfast shootin' off
crackers and rockets with the other
boys. Pritty soon ma colled me in
two breakfast and then i remember
ed my surprise; i run op in my
room to get it. It wuz a big Red
rocket thet i baut the nite bofour
the biggest wnn i oood fin 1. Wen 1
cum down i sean the old cat, Tab,
nsleep under the stove, while the
dog, Spot, her mortal inimy, wuz
laying down by the door. Ma wuz
in the pantry and pa wuz jest set tin'
down two the tabel when i got down
behind the stove and tied that big
rocket fast to that cat's tail. Wen
i tuohed a match too the fuse i ex
peck ted she'd move and spoil awl
my plans bat she only winked wun
i at me. "Brekfast is reddv. John.
nie," sez ma. "Yeaaum," sez i, and
and got up and set down too the
tabel. Then pa put on a long faoe
like Dekun Skinner's at prayer
meotin', to say grace. "Oh, Lord,
we thank the for the menny bless-
in's that thou dust bos too upon us,"
he begun, when a loud izploshun
nwlmost took the roof off the house
and with a blud-kurdlin' yell Tab
sprung on Spot's back. With a
snarl Spot jumped back and Tab
jumped agen and this time landed
square on pa's head. She clawed,
and pa swore and knock her off on
the tabel, tippin' over ma's new
china sugar bowl. Ma fainted just
as Tab made her last jump, goin'
thru the open winder, breakin' down
sum wunderful shrub thet Unkel
Bob braut back from the West In
dies, finally landin' iu the flower
bed. Then she disappeared and
wuz sean no more far a weak. As
fur ma, she cum too in time to dress
pa's woonds. He had 4 big scratches
on his face. The furst thing he sed
after ma dressed his woouds wuz,
"John Henry, ile settel with yew
fur this. Come out in the wood
shed fur a wile." I won't say wot
happened then but if the Forth wuz
n't selabrated durin' the next ten
minits, it wuzn't pa's fault.
Shi Didn't Wear a Mask.
But her beauty was completely
hidden by sores, blotches and pim
ples till she used Bucklou'a Arnica
Salve. Then they vanished as will
all Eruptions, fever sores, boils, ul
cers, carbuucles and felons from its
use. Infallible for cuts, oorns,
burns, scalds and piles. Cure guar
nnteed. 25c at all druggists.