12/A Very Special Wedding | List (Continued from page 10) But preparing the guest list and order- ing invitations is a manageable task if the bride approaches it in an organized manner. According to wedding stationery sup- pliers, the best way for the bride to begin is to request guest lists - typewritten if possible - from both sides of the family. 3-by-5-inch index cards, which makes it "easier to eliminate duplicates. Then, to - reach the desired number of guests, the lists should be purged as fairly as possi- ble. : The wise bride - one who doesn’t want to to be left standing at the altar - will ‘not attempt to eliminate all of her fiance’s fraternity brothers’ names from the list so she invite all her cousins. ~ Once the final list has been completed, names and order invitations. According to etiquette, one invitation is sent to a couple. Attendants and clergy or other officials get invitations even though it is assumed they’ll be there. Single adults over the age of 18 living with their parents also should get their own invita- tions. And a few extra invitations should be ordered for mementos and so that alternate guests can be invited if some guests promptly decline to attend. When selecting a style of invitation, remember that the style should fit the more formal look. An invitation on heavy white or ivory paper using classic black ink is one of the most formal looks, according to the stationers. Less-formal choices range from pastel, verse- inscribed parchment to invitations incor- porating a color photo of the couple and using colored ink. Lettering styles range from Old English script to modern block print. The most common invitations first list the names of whomever is sponsoring the wedding, followed by the bride’s name, her fiance, the date, time and place. Some couples want to include all parents on the invitation, even if only the bride’s parents cover expenses or if the couple itself is covering expenses. Again, the formality of the occasion can determine the wording, everything from ‘request the honour of your presence” to “share in the celebration.” The basic wedding invitation includes the invitation itself enclosed in an inner envelope and mailed in a second enve- lope, stationers say. But many brides consider additional enclosures essential - guests simply check if they are attending or not and mail back the card in a self- addressed, stamped envelope. Some brides also include a separate card with reception information, a map to the reception or at-home cards that tell guests where the couple will live after the wedding and when they will receive mail at that address. It’s a good idea to order thank you notes when ordering invitatins, stationers say. Notes can be ordered to match February 26, 1986 names and initials or left blank. If imprinted with names, the bride may want to order some with her name only to use for shower gifts and gifts received before the wedding. She also should order some that both she and her husband can use after the wedding, for example, printed with ‘John and Susan Jones” or “Mr. and Mrs. John Jones.” When it comes to ordering, a bride should contact several stationers to com- pare paper quality and get the best price. Stationers recommend ordering invita- tions three months before the wedding. The bride should ask for envelopes in advance, if possible, so she can begin addressing them. And she should ask to see a sample of the invitation to check for errors before the final order is printed. For addressing invitations, rules of etiquette dictate the use of full names of people, streets and states - no abbrevia- tions. Address inner envelopes “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” instead of ‘John and Mary” no matter how well you know the couple. Place the invitation in the inner enve- lope with the printed side facing the flap. The front of the unsealed inner envelope should face the back of the outer enve- lope, as should any enclosures. 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