ESTABLISHED 1889 Soil ‘ Published by ‘THE DALLAS POST, INC. Publication Office } 2 Lehman Avenue, Dallas, Pennsylvania “Member Pennsylvania Newspaper Publishers Association Member Circulation Audit Bureau. A .,/ Member American Press Association. \ THe DALLAS POST is a youthful weekly rural-suburban newspaper, waed, edited and operated by young men interested in the development of the = at rural-suburban region of ‘Luzerne County and in the attainment of the ‘highest ideals of journalism. Thirty- one surrounding communities contribute eekly articles to THE POST and have an interest in its editorial policies. D POST is truly “more ‘than a newspaper, it is a community institution.” ; 1 Congress shall make no law * * * abridging the freedom of speech, or of Subscription, $2.00 Per Year (Payable in Advance) & \ Nol Vth DAN It was a great idea former residents of Stull, deserted “MM yoming county lumbering town, had a few weeks ago when more than’ 175 persons gathered to RELIVE OLD hold a reunion and Old Timers’ Day. Noxen aud many other communities throughout Hi this section of the State are holding annual on iui ompany. Why not a that event with some kind of [Qos Day for Shavertown and all of the adjacent year when old residents’ return, when acquaintances are newed, and everybody in this section takes a day off to enter whole-heartedly into the spirit of the occasion? . Since the days of the old Dallas Fair there has never been a similar community project where residents of all of these communities could gather and renew acquaintances. ‘he all-day program sponsored by Shavertown firemen Ye offers this opportunity. Many of us live the year around in Dallas, Shavertown, Trucksville or, Fernbrook and never meet our fellow townsmen. After all we are not above the! : ' communities in which we live. We have failed to join to- gether as one great community and show that we have any community loyalty. Potentially the communities of this region are strong enough, pretty enough and worthy of some show of community loyalty. Let’s all get back of ! Kingston Township’s All-Day Cel#bration and invite old friends and residents to come back for the day. The committee in clrarge of the program is working Bf (make the = affair a success, but however hard they i A se lt: Baseball teams in the Rural League complain oh they get little support from their communities. The Dallas & team is unable to find suitable grounds for E | NINE CEME- a diamond and there isn’t enough public - TERIES— spirit here to stir up interest enough to help = No LIBRARY the boys get one. ; Whether in the baseball team, the schools, ; the churches or any other community project, the continual hue and cry is, “we get no support and no co- operation.” ~~ Taken all in all there is hardly a citizen in the whole territory who hasn’t voiced this opinion oncé or a dozen times during the past year. ~~ Of pure selfishness, the community has plenty. And when we say community we mean the back mountain re- gion. We fail to see that through working together we can accomplish more individually than we can by taking a pure- ly selfish and personal view of the community. Any per- son, whether he be a newcomer to the community or an old citizen, soon finds himself crucified, if with a little more daring than the usual run of citizen, he attempts to voice a different opinion than the group holds or attempts to lead ‘any community project. The simple truth is that most of “us haven’t the good old American “guts” to say our soul is our own or the brains to be real leaders. If there are any “real leaders in the back mountain region, they are so effec- tively hiding their light under a bushel that neither they or the community is benefitting by their ability. is Here we are, potentially a great community. Our ‘population is large—large enough to support the very best . schools, excellent churches a good library, a community club, baseball teams and every community project any per- son could reasonably expect to find here. Plain unadulte- rated cussedness prevents us from having these things. Our existence is more that of a hermit crab than that of an ‘up and coming community. Instead of working together we continually work at loggerheads. It would all be very nice to write sugar coated editori- _ als telling what a wonderful community we are. It would look better in print, especially in the ‘hands of persons liv- | ing outside this area, but what's the use of kidding our- selves. There are many things to be done before we can do much honest boasting. There will be lots of persons who will agree with this “editorial and there will be many more who won't. Maybe somebody will tear the paper up and send it back to us as somebody did a few weeks ago with the remark that POST editorials are written by a young upstart. Be that as it may, we don’t expect anybody to have enough courage to say whether he thinks this editorial is right or wrong or to send us a note over his own signature saying that we are right or wrong. No, that would be too much to expect from a community « of nine cemeteries and no public library. * uly [Fes | \ Her parents di played no great emo- tion at the wedding, but I imagine her father shed a few cheers: —Boston Transcript. ff —0— \ . Wives should remember that the average man is like an egg. If you keep him in hot water, he soon be- comes hardboiled.—Canton Repository. ] f 07> Things are reported to be bad in Hollywood, and many of the lesser lights of the film-world are out of work. Indeed some of them are mak- ing this year’s divorce do till things are better.—~Punch (London). | t Rei Most of these love triangles turn in- to wrecktangles.—Boston Transcript. —0— ' Maud has made some swell marri- ages but divorced all her husbands. Having outgrown select circles, she now moves, so to speak, in the best triangles.—Boston Transcript. 0— : / MODERN YOUTH Mother: You know, Geoffrey, Norma. is mearly 17 years old, so today I had a frank discussion with her about the facts of life. ¢ Father: Ah Did you learn anything new ?—Everybody’ S. Zilia) Young girls of ‘today holdly reach: their teens before they are at their nicoteens.—Boston Transcript. Lo ——— Familiarity breeds nell Widow. attempt.—Cor- Lot She doesr’t kiss or neck or any- thing—she is nobody's fuel.—Colgate. Banter. —_—— ‘You are burning the candle at both ends,” said a parent, admonishing his spendthrift son. “But, dad,” the youth Feturned, ‘you always told me I should try to make both ends meet.”—Boston Transcript. hs ‘ WOMEN y The Scotchman said he loved blondes because of the lighter over- head.—Baptist. J TE iy 8 She is always complaining that sine has so little to wear—and last night at the ball she seemed to be wearing it.—~Pathfinder. Akal That girl must be 25. She's stuck to the same story all the years I've known her.—Pathfinder. : f —0— . She’s the kind of woman that talks on and cn about the things that leave her speechless.—Pathfinder. : / myles Wr She is a rarely beautiful girl—very rarely, indeed.—Boston Transcript. re (re Dubioys., compliment: She is as pretty as can be.—Pathfinder. —O— CHILDREN Little girl: “My, what a pretty baby. How old is it?” Mother: “Two months.” L. G.: “Is it your youngest?’—Car- negie Tech Puppet. : ro “Sam, Ah jes’ seen a alligator eatin’ our younges’ chile” : : “Umm-uh Sho’ nuff? You know Ah thought sump’n been gittin’ our chil- lun”—Life. | Postscripts’ Among the modern American poets none is better known than Dorothy Parker, writer of sentimental poems. Recently W. W. Scott in “Life” took occasion to write in her style. He took Mother Goose rhymes and revamped them in the style Dorothy Parker likes to use so well. Here they are: If Dorothy Parker Had Written 7 “Mother Goose” ' Tears for a Pillow Rub-a-dub-dub T= YOU CAN BUST THT NINETY Tor DAY ! LEAVE ORE TLL — START RINGING | —r" MINUTE YOU'RE out THAT DOOR = IMMEDIATE, Sion) ® 1928 Bomwner- Brown And who do you think they be? ¥ The- butcher, the baker, The candlestick maker, And none in love with me. To oe Reward of Inconstancy Mistress Mary, quite contrary, How does your garden grow? With. cockle-shells and silver bells And broken hearts all in a row: Verse for a Tombstone Foto Jack Spratt would eat no fat, His wife would eat no lean. And that my dear's the silly way Our love has always been. Tat Introspection Sing a song of sixpence, i A pocket full of rye, {= Four-and-twenty blackbirds Baked in a pie. When the pie was opened The birds began to sing; ! A I wonder why I stick around And write this sort of thing. 11 Frustration Little Tommy Tucker Sings for his supper. What shall he eat? White bread and butter. How shall he cut it Without any knife? You said it, Tommy, It's a bum deal—life. 4 TT. FF Lines to a Passion Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet Eating of curds and whey, Along came a spider And sat down beside her. All men are funny that way. x feet 4 ' To a Forsaken Lady’ Little Bo-Peep has lost her sheep, And can’t tell where to find him. Leave him alone and he'll come home And many lads behind him. ¥ Subject Matter Humpty-Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty-Dumpty had a great fall. All the king’s horses and all the king's men keep my Can't heart from breaking Three lads ift a tub, again. om A garage is a place where a man keeps his oil can, wrench and SO, Mapy of the wife’s contraptions that he has to keep his car parked in the drive- way, says Charles Howe. I—i—F A woman can sit in the living room all dressed up the entire afternoon and nobody comes. But let her start to take a bath! fi—t (George Still tells us that his kids found the stone he had taken out of his bladder over in mamma's rock garden. St Jim 'Oims says loving in ‘a sport coupe is so much more comfortable, folks have about given up sleighride parties. ; —i— Quitting time in a bank doesn't means a thing to the teller who's a couple bucks short in ‘his ¢ash, says Freddy Eck. fmt—f Ma says it ‘was six months after Dad lost his front teeth before he got over the habit of covering his mouth with his hand every time he laughed at a funny story. F—i—% Maybe they say a candidate con- ducts a promising campaign because it is nothing else but. f—i—F As summer wears on, one becomes more and more undecided whether he really prefers mowing the lawn and ; X \ \ bh RE ara SEEN AND HEARD By WILL WIMBLE trimming the hedges to shoveling coal and checking on the alcohol in the radiator. ; f= The' fact that fish can’t close their eves is the only think that keeps them from winking at some ' of the local fishermen. \ f—f—% Which reminds us that some one once described the oyster as a fish that was built like a nut. Who was that? f—i—1 y A health expert advises keeping baked goods in the ice box in hot weather. And if it’s huckleberry. pie, the missus also advises locking the ice box, $—f—% It is because the fish in the streams are so unfriendly that thé canned salmon season succeeds. Ask Al Lasher. 11 A bridge player about town was playing at a very nice club, when his partner for reasons we shall not at- tempt to go into, threw all his 13 cards at him. This insulted Mr. Blank, as we shall call him, and he left the room. Flushed and nervous, hé paced about, and in so doing came upon one of the board of governors. Mr. Blank told him what had hap- pentd and demanded that some sort of action be taken. “My good fellow,” said the gover- nor, who was not one of the more (Continued on page 7) @ LETTERS.... TOTHE ....EDITOR | Mehoopeny, Pa., August 2, 1931. Neighbor Risley: My Post arrived this wou right on the minute. Thanks for your courtesy and business enterprise—but, however, I wish you ‘would appologize to your readers for publishing my kind of rail- ing stuff. 1 wrote you upon the im- pulse of the moment not thinking that my. request would ever be known in print. sk wish in this to congratulate you upon your editorial effort and to com- mend ‘you for presenting the matter of house numbering, road hogs and woman school directors. The last has been tried out in some districts, how- ever, and not been found a perfect suc- cess. I would not dare to express an opinion upon this matter for fear it would lead to conflict with those near- er home. Ly There is another home ynafter that should receive your attention and that is the audit of the Dallas borough. Over four years and not a statement by thosegin official charge to show whether Dallas borough is in exist- ence financially or not. = There is suspicion of insolvency, when unusual financing is offered by calling a bank note against the school district as an asset, and pass ~ Fit up that way by some members of the board. When the audit does come I am anxious to see how far my prediction of a borough school indebtedness of $65,000 at the close of the past year was out of the way, and I am con- scious that the auditors - will have trouble in gathering in all the numerous debts that are now out- standing. ‘Turning to agriculture I might add that all crops here are bountiful. Oats are equal to last year; corn is rank, good color and luxuriant; stand clover unusual yield and all put in the barns in fine: condition; buckwheat jumping with perfect weather conditions; Tim- othy is the weakest crop, and potatoes, barring bugs ana wlight, will be a bumper crop. 4 Milk is the money resources for . these farmers, but the price is discouraging. They received last month $1.84 per hundred for their milk. They pay 22% cents per cwt for cartage to station leaving them $1.11% a hundred pounds or 2.23 cents a quart. Now think of that, when you in Dal- las pay 12c a quart for milk. What puzzles me is that some wide- awake farmer with a nice herd of cows in that district does not start in with a clean outfit and good milk and offer to the consumers in that town and vicinity milk at something near a reasonable price. Coal, milk and baker's bread are the ‘only three things that seem to be controlled by monop« oly or syndicate. Drugs and medi- cines and spirits of fermenti are, of course, in a class by themselves. Now the mosquito annoyance that I' spoke of in my last, ‘we have in a measure overcome—by simply spread- ing a sheet of Tangle-foot over the ‘top of our heads. This | prevention might not be the most delightful in a ! pillow case point of view, and we ex- | pect to hear the echo of this novelty on wash day when we get home. There is still another menace to solid contentment which has over taken us, and that is we are unable to remove our inner garments without pain and! blasphemy, owing to.the in- numerable fishbones protuding through the epidermis over the entire surface of the body. To make this thought more inelegant I might explain that we can’t get our shorts off on account of fishbones sticking through the skin. This condition, we are satisfied, is due 0 excessive indulgence in the “Menu” provided for the regular members of the tribe. The prospects for game this fall are flattering. Plenty of rabbits and ring necks, a few of native grouse, while deer are the pest of the farmer's life. They are now barding the buckwheat fields on every hillside. + I expect to be located in some se- (Continued on page 7) A MAD WORLD “Ha! Ha! A mad world, a mad world.” —Lord Mayor of London & Atlantic City are both bidding for the Republican Na- tional Convention. Bidding is liter- ally true. Cities usually pay for the privilege of acting as host to the 15,~ 000 delegates more or: less who at- tend the conventions of the two great political parties. The sums paid inte the party's campaign fund range Philadelphia and from $100,000 to $150,0000 If the convention = lasts several days the city soon makes ‘this amount up through the spendings of delegates. Philadelphia in all likelihood will not get the Republican National conven- tion, because Pennsylvania is a strong Republican State. Conven- tions * are usually held in doubtful states where their presence will stimulate votes for the party they represent. For the same Treason Presidential candidates are frequent- ly selected from doubtful regions to help bolster up the vote. ' Strongly Republican, only one United States President has come from Pennsyl- vania. The State’s staunch Repub- licanism has helped to bring this abouts i= The Pennsylvania Game Commission sends the following: On the track ahead of his engine, Engineer John Stapleton, of the Philadelphia & Read- ing R. R., saw something fluttering. flopping. He stopped the train, cli ed out, preceived it was a hen 00d cock broken-winging to szve her chicks, who were betweer the rails. f—t—3/ United States railrfads in the first six months of 1931 placed 6,951 new freigat cars in service as against 49,- 208 for the same period last year and 82,794 two years ago. On July 14 there were 571,410 surplus freight cars in good repair and immediately avail- able for service. —t—t Recently an alligator was shot in the Lehigh River. Usually alligators are not found in the Lehigh. Inter- esting as it was there was nothing funy about finding the alligator in the river for it had escaped from its keepers and sought shelter in the river. But out in Sandusky, Ohio, re- cently something really funny did hap- pen. For many months there have been rumors of a giant sea serpent in Lake Erie, Two traveling salesmen fishing from a row boat suddenly saw a hugh heavy coil, grey on top and white underneath break the water be- side their craft a yellow, black-crowii- ed head, six inches across the fore- « head, rose up and cold glittering eyes stared at them unblinkingly. Moke timid souls than the il wold have started rowing for Shore right then. But not so thes Siro mon. They unshipned their oars struck the head, stunned #i¢ Credit ®, fished its 18-foot lénetr out of the WRAET: wad- dedi the boat and brought it to shite; crated it and locked it if their +utomobile. As soon as it was grated it came to life. Crowds numbfring thousands came to see it. Dirpctor Henry L. Madison, of Cleveland's! Mu- seum of Natural History, came to ave a look and declared it to be apython, a snake of Bast Indian variety 2nd strong. enough to crush a horse. ‘No one could decide how a python ever got in Lake Erie, prevailing A &