REEIAID TRIBUNE.
ESTABLISHED 1888.
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Entered at tho I'ostofflce at Freeland. Pa.
as Second-Class Matter.
Make all money orders, checks, cto., payable
to the Tribune Printing Company, Limited.
Denmark utilizes tlie uiillc of 1,733,-
73a cows In her' dairy Industry. Iu
189S she exported 121,418,431 pounds
of butter; in 18! li), 122, 412,.71)3 pounds,
and iu 1000, 124,023,803 pounds. The
steady Increase in exports is the best
testimony to tho inherent value of the
product.
The large number of educated men
who are applicants for positions as
warrant machinists in the navy and
the rigid examinations to which they
arc subjected afford an illustration
both of the growing popularity of
technical education and of the higher
standards demanded in the naval ser
vice, observes the Baltimore Sun.
Guatemala lias just put into force
stringent regulations governing the
cutting of timber iu its mahogany and
cedar forests. Lumbermen will here
after have to pay a big price for the
privilege of carrying on their business.
The object of the new regulations is
to prevent wanton waste in lumbering
and to save the forests from total de
struction.
The Australasian Commonwealth
has introduced a hill iu Parliament
which prohibits admission iuto Aus
tralia of any person "unable to write
u fifty-word tost frofii English dicta
tion."' It is already provided that no
immigrant shall be admitted who Is
likely to become a burden on the pub
lie purse or who within three years
has been convicted of a nonpolitleal
offence. The educational qualification
is designed to effectively exclude Chi
nese and other undesirable immi
grants.
Our own Congressional Record must
look to Its laurels and hurry up if it
is not to be surpassed by the parlia
mentary record of the youngest State
In tho world. In the first live weeks
of the session of the Australian parlia
ment enough speeches were made to
fill SSO closely printed pages, and as
the Australians have not learned the
trick of "leave to print," this menus
that every word in those 580 pages
were spoken during the sessions. YVe
can fancy some enemy of the speaker
saying:
Cod of tho southern winds, call up Thy
gales
And whistle in rude fury 'round his cars.
The Klondike is already feeling tho
evil effects of forest denudation. Since
the discovery of gold there the sparse
ly timbered hills of the district have
been stripped of all tree growth to
fill the extraordinary demands for
fuel in milling operations and other
purposes. The hills for many miles
around nil of the productive creeks are
now bare, and the ground being thus
exposed the snow accumulated during
the winter quickly melts tu the early
summer. Tills year there lias been an
early and prolonged drought in con
sequence and the prospective output
of gold has been reduced from $30,-
000,000, the original estimates, to $20,-
000,000, because of the lack of water
to wusli the auriferous earth.
There is iu Lower California a
strange colony of which the outside
world rarely hears. It Is made up of
outlaws, and some of the most no
torious escaped criminals have taken
refuge in it. Tbey live in a strange,
rugged stretch of country, with the
Gulf of California on one side and a
range of foothills which spread down
toward the Mexican border on the otli
e;\ There are no ports at this point
on the coast of California, and no
railroads reaching in from the other
direction, so the men are completely
isolated. They are practically pris
oners, because they dare not venture
out, but no effort has over been made
to disturb them in their chosen refuge,
though they have been congregating
there for years.
TEACHERS ANQ TOILERS.
If we didn't have this toiling through the Store, the pod.*, nnte the toilers are not
dreary, weary years— ever overkind;
If we didn't have the heartaches, if we For they lift them not when fallen, and
didn't have the tears, they lead them not when blind.
We might reap the rarest flowers that Walk their wise disciples with us? Do
have blossomed in the dew— they tread the barren soil?
We might learn the sweetest lessons that It is one thing to be teaching and another
they teach, who never knew! tiling to toil.
It is one thing in the trouble—in the So, we burn the daylight for you—o tcach
trouble and the strife, ers grave, of men!—
To be striving for the laurel that may You that slumber when the darkness sees
wreathe the brows of life; us toil in town and glen:
To seek in vain that laurel which is ever But you never learn this lesson—which
out of reach: — seems ever out of reach:—
It is one thing to be toiling, and another It 4 is one thing be toiling, and another
thing to teach. thing to teach.
—Frank L. Stanton, in Atlanta Const*ution.
1 THE PARACHUTE DROP. I
8f 8s
83 81
Told by fir. Lane-Stokes, Aeronaut.
THE parachute now is to the
balloon and to the air ship
what tho lifeboat is to the
ocean steamer. No well ap
pointed balloon goes voyaging into
the aerial ocean without one.
Scientific aeronauts, like Professor
Myers, do not approve of them, but
they have become indispensable to
balloonists who do a holiday exhibi
tion business. The public is quite as
fond of the parachute "drop" as of the
balloon itself. People not only like
to see a man go up, hut they wish to
see him come down.
The parachute, like the balloon, is
noAV too well known to require de
scription. When folded, the parachute
and its lines hang down about thirty
live feet from the "basket" of the bal
loon. When expanded, the "umbrel
la" is from twelve to fifteen feet in
diameter. Although light, tho frame
and lines must needs be made very
strong In descending the aeronaut
generally sits ou a species of trapeze
bar, which is supported at each end
by the lines from the umbrella above
It.
When ready to drop from the bal
loon, the aeronaut, who Is necessarily
somewhat of an athlete, descends to
the trapeze bar, then pulls a cord at
tached to the "knife" set In the block
above, through which the supporting
lino is reeved. The knife-edge, when
jerked smartly down on the taut line,
severs it cleanly—and the descent he
gins. For the first hundred feet the
parachute drops like a stone, then un
folds with a flirt, checks the descent,
and thereafter for a thousand feet or
more sinks gradually earthward at a
rate of hardly more than ten feet a
second.
Under favorable conditions, descent
by parachute is not particularly haz
ardous to an active young man who
possesses quick sight and good judg
ment as to distances.
Altogether the narrator has made
about 150 descents by parachute—and
is still alive and well. Beyond doubt,
there are certain dangers from sud
den gusts of wind which may waft
tho parachute over rivers, canals,
small ponds, tree tops or the sleep
roofs of buildings. I once fell into
the top of a rotv of sugar maples in
front of n farmhouse, and was some
what scratched while tumbling
through tho branches to the earth.
On another occasion, some twenty
miles out of .Tackson, Mich., I had the
ill fortune to drop on a row of bee
hives. I upset four of tho hives at
once, and the angry lusoets gave me
clear proof of their resentment before
I could c-lear myself from tho para
chute lines.
And as I was running away as fast
as I could tho equally angry owner of
the bees pursued me with abuse and
peremptory demands for recompense.
In fact I found him rather worse than
the bees.
On Lnbor Day, the following year, I
made an ascent from a New England
factory town, and in descending, acci
dentally dropped into the top of a pear
tree in a farmer's garden. I not only
knocked off a bushel of fine pears, but
broke the top of the tree rather badly.
The man deemed S2O (all the money I
had about me) too slight remuneration
for the damage I had done. He not
only seized my parachute, vi et nrmis,
hut prosecuted me at law. Tho jury,
however, awarded him but sl2, with
out costs of court.
On another occasion I received a
most unmerciful thrashing, hut not, I
am glad to say, at the hands of human
beings. On this occasion I had made
an ascent from a large Canadian town.
It was some sort of a holiday there,
and a great crowd of lumbermen, mill
meu, river drivers and farmers from
the surrounding country had flocked
to the town. I was to go up at 2. hut
before noon there arose a stiff south
wind which portended rain. I there
fore attempted to cancel the engage
ment; It was highly dangerous to
make an ascent In such weather, but
the crowd would not take this view
of the conditions. Tho lumbermen
and river drivers gathered around,
yelling like wild man. They had be
come suspicious that I was trying to
cheat them. They swore that they had
come thirty miles to see me go up, and
go up I should, or they would smash
my balloon and drive me out of town.
It was taking my life in my hand,
but rather than face that angry crowd
I east off, soared upward over houses
and churches, and went flying toward
Hudson Bay.
Hudson Bay, it is true, was 1200
miles distant, but at the rate I was
I was going when the balloon rose
into that strong wind I concluded that
I should get there by sundown.
I was advertised to inako a descent
by parachute in the neighborhood of
the town, where the assembled multi
tude could see mo come doivu, but
that was entirely a fair weather ar
rangement.
I wore my exhibition suit of spangled
tights under my street clothes as
usual, but when I saw how the wind
blew I had no notion of attempting to
use the parachute. In fact, I "was as
cending under compulsion, and had no
clear idea how I should get down. X
wanted to get away from that crowd.
I actually had been afraid they would
kill me If I failed to go up. The howl
ing was something frightful.
"Good-bye, you unfeeling animals!"
I shouted. "Unless tills balloon bursts
you will not see me again very soon!"
An upturned sea of swarthy faces was
watching for me to descend.
However, I had Soon left them all
behind. Now that I was aloft, borne
on tho wings of the mighty air current
I did not feel the wind at all. The bal
loon moved with it. Not a breath
seemed to stir. It was only by look
ing down at the earth that I saw how
rapidly I was traveling onward, over
river, wide spruce forests and scat
tered clearings. I knew the story of
La Mountain and his balloon, and had
a horror of being carried off iuto the
Canadian wilderness. I hoped that In
tho course of an hour or two the wind
might fall, or the direction of the air
current change.
The balloon continued to go steadily
forward, however, in a northerly
course until tlm little clearings and
cabins below grew few and far be
tween.
I must have traveled nearly 150
miles when I saw a large lake, or
rather a group of three or four lakes,
come into view on the horizon. Di
rectly tho black of the spruce woods
had begun to fade into the pale gray
of mossy hogs of tamarack and the
purple hue of caribou barrens. I
could not see a clearing or sign of hu
man habitation anyAvliere. The crowd
which I had left behind was bad
enough, but the unexplored wilderness
of lake and swamp ahead of me be
gan to have an aspect even more grim
and terrifying. Moreover, I desired,
If possible, to save my balloon. To de
scend in a gale is always perilous, but
there seemed no help for it. I dared
not try the parachute, and so finally I
pulled open the gas valve. The bal
loon soon began to approach the gray
swamps that stretched away to the
lakes ahead.
All the time I was flying as fast as
a horse could run; and as I sank lower
I perceived that I was likely to do
some rough "trailing."
When I came within 300 or 400 feet
of the ground I threw out a strong
grapnel and line, which swung clear
for some minutes, then began to brush
the tall tree tops and catch in them.
By good luck—of which I had had
little enough thus far that day—these
slight hitches greatly diminished the
speed of the balloon, and the grapnel
soou catching stronger hold, basket,
balloon and all came down with a sud
den hard flounce in a thicket of low,
shrub-like firs, bordering a small bay
on one of the lakes—and there, hold
ing fast, swayed up and down.
I was pitched out of the basket into
mud and water, but jumped to my feet
and started to run back among tho
thick firs to secure the anchorage when
I became suddenly aware that I was
not alone.
A loud squawking and squalling
arose all about me. I had come down
in a swamp where wild geese were on
their nests. I was actually treading
on them and on their great white eggs
before I saw them. Every fir bush,
with its widespread boughs, appeared
to have a nest under it.
The outcry that all these geese set
up was something deafening. They
rose up, flapping their wings, hissing
and squalling, and at once from ail
s'des, from the thickets and from the
pond, there came rushing, flying, skim
ming over the firs whole flocks of the
biggest and most savage gray ganders
I ever set eyes on. They dashed at me,
at the balloon, at the parachute, and
at the basket, and bit like bulldogs,
and the blows from their long, hard
wings were like blows from a flail.
Before I could make shift to defend
myself with my knife or balloon hook
they had hold of me by my clothing,
by my legs, by my hair even, tug
ging, yelling and thrashing me. One
pinched my cheek so that the blood
flowed. Their wings pounded my
head like clubs. I dodged this way
and that, and laying about me with
the staff of my hook, knocked down
ganders right and left, but still they
came.
I lost a moment In a foolish effort to
got my revolver from the wicker lock
er in the basket, and was well nigh
overborne. If once they had beaten
me down they would have killed me,
oeyond doubt, but I now began jump
ing from side to side among the
dodging and striking with the hook.
These tactics confused the ganders,
for In their mad fury they flow blind
ly against each other. I con
stantly stumbling Into more nesta, but
kept in the fir brush, scudding this
way and that, as tho ganders charged
me.
After this fashion I retreated for
nearly a mile, I think, fighting all tho
way till I got among larger trees when
the attack slackened.
! Rain began falling. I was In about
| as bad a plight as can well be im
agined! Night was at hand, night in
an untrodden wilderness. I saw a
boar looking at me from out on a tam
arack bog, and getting frightened I
started to run. I had not gone far,
however, when I heard the report of a
gun. Thereupon shouting for help I
ran In the direction of the noise, and
In the course of a few minutes met an
Indian coming to find me. lie had
seen the balloon come down, and was
curious to see the man who traveled
In the air. He led me out to the bank
of a river where there was a bark
camp and three other Indians. They
received me kindly. Installed me in a
warm corner of their camp out of the
rain, and gave me all the fried deer
meat I could eat.
But when I talked with them of re
turning to the swamp to recover tho
balloon they shook their heads, and
gave me to understand that it was as
much as a man's life was worth to
venture Into a goose swamp In breed
ing time. The object lesson I had re
ceived led me to believe that their
fears wore well grounded.
The next morning the Indian who
had found me led me through the for
est for fifteen or twenty miles to a
sawmill on a branch of the Gatineau
River, where I hired a Frenchman
with a shaggy little black horse and
buckboard to drive me forty miles to
a French settlement called Maniwaki,
and from this place I got back two
days later to the town from which I
made the ascent.
I had lost my balloon and had come
near losing my life; yet tho celebra
tion committee which had hired mo to
make the ascent refused to pay me
more than half the sum agreed upon,
because I had not made the descent
by parachute. Since that bit of expe
rience I take care to get my pay of
celebration committees in advance,
and also to see to it that an "iron
clad" clause concerning the matter is
inserted In the agreement.—Youth's
Companion.
HINT TO COUNTRY MERCHANTS.
Tho Local Weekly llin Defense Agniiiflt
Mall Order Hounes.
Tho country merchant is making a
(treat talk about the mall order houses
in the his cities who arc getting trade
aivay from him, but with all his out
cry ho is really making 110 serious ef
fort to prevent it, says the Advertising
World. You can't stop people from
buying where they think they can lmy
the cheapest, simply by the use of in
vective. The only way the country
merchant can hope to compete with
(he mall order houses Is by meeting
them on their own ground—by adver
tising.
There is absolutely no hope for tho
business of the couutry merchant un
til he corrects a few of his time worn
views about advertising. Advertising
is simply telling what you have to sell
and the price. It makes no difference
if your ads. are not written hy an ex
pert or illustrated by a high-priced art
ist, you can make them effective and
result producing if you boar in mind
the one point that an ad. should tell
about what you have to sell and not
simply about yourself.
The advertising done by the average
country merchant is usually something
frightful. He docs not consider adver
tising a force by which he is to di
rectly increase his business, but as a
kind of leg-pulling proposition on the
part of 1 lie local newspaper. Any old
tiling will do him in the way of an an
nouncement, and the smaller the space
the editor will let him down with the
better the bargain he Imagines he has
made. Some merchants carry nothing
hut a stereotyped card, year in and
year out, yet if they stopped to think,
they find that they have dozens of
things they eouhl sell at less than reg
ular prices and which, if made known,
would attract many buyers who would
otherwise seud to the big cities for
tlieui. The secret of the success of
the mail order firms is situply because
their advertisements tell something.
Any kind of advertising is of course
better than none. All advertising
pays in some way or another, but the
merchant who does no advertising at
all, because ho is not able to afford
big pages, tnnkes one large mistake.
If you can't do the best advertising,
do the best you can. What the best
Is that you can do may seem very
small, but advertising is something
that pays for Itself and it increases
right along.
A Burning Question At Erjn VlnwT,
"Of course, some of our problems in
mathematics are very puzzling," said
the Eryu Jlawr sophomore, "but there
is a far harder question which is in 110
way connected with our studies. There
is an unwritten law in Bryu Jlawr
that a gill must not walk aione with
a professor, and we are all very care
ful about observing it. There is an
other rule, also unwritten, tlurt a stu
dent must not walk about alone nfter
dark. Now, if a girl is detained un
avoidably ill the evening, and while
walking home meets a professor going
her way, which rule is she to break?
There have been a gTeat many hitter
discussions about that point, and no
body hns ever reached a decision."
"Yes," said her friend, sympatheti
cally, "it must he a very troublesome
quest an. But what does a girl gen
erally do when she is caught in such
an embarrassing situation?"
"Oh, that," replied the young col
legienne, "depends entirely on how
well she likes the professor."—New
York Times.
CHEAT ON "POINTS."
Pfrtl Doc; Whow Natural Traits Amonnfc
od to a Mania.
"Talking about bird dogs," said the
man with the shifty eye, in the rear
seat of the trolley car—and tiobody
had said a word aliout bird dogs or
any other kind of dogs—"l had the
most remarkable bird dog tbat ever
happened, I guess, when I was living
out in Santa Barbara, Cnl„ in 'O3. I
don't s'pose there will ever be the
likes of that dog on this earth again.
I raised Idm from a pup. He was a
pointer from away baek. It was just
as natural for tbat dog to llop on to
bis haunches and point at a bird as
it is for us humans to eat things that
don't agree with us.
"He began to point before be had
shed his milk teeth. I took him out
for a walk one day when he was only
about two months old,, and it took us
nbout four hours to get over two miles
of ground, for that dog would sit down
and point at a bird about every ten
feet of our progress. It didn't make
any sort of difference what' kind of
a bird it was that he pointed at. He'd
point at any old kind of a bird. If
n little bunch of English sparrows
would settle down in the middle of
the street he'd just sit down and
point at them, and it was all I could
do to get him to come along with me.
He'd point at a robin sitting on top
of a Cottonwood tree, and he'd point
at a Brahim rooster clawing up a
flower bed in a front yard. Any old
thing ibat had feathers on it that
dog of mine would point at. Had
him out one afternoon when n bald
headed eagle began to soar around
above Santa Barbara, about three
miles up in the air, and blamed if
tbat dog didn't catch sight of the no
ble bird and point nt it until I had
to bat him witli a club to induce him
to come along with me.
"One day I had an aching tooth,
and 1 decided to go to a dentist and
have the miserable molar yanked out.
I felt so bad that I took that pointer
pup along with me for company on
my way to the tentist's office, and
when he got to the door he slipped
into the office with me. Next thing I
knew that pointer pup of mine was
sitting back on his quarters, a-point
ing at a picture of some rallied grouse
that the dentist had on the wall of
his reception room.
"In the course of time pointing got
to be a regular mania of that dog's,
and I couldn't take him out for exer
cise very often on account of his habit
of lagging behind and point nt feath
ered things. Took him out one
afternoon when he was about a year
old, and a furniture van with a lot of
pillows piled on top of some beds
came along. One of tho pillows was
broken at the side and a lot of feath
ers escaped. That dog of mine saw
the flying feathers, and blame me if
he didn't sit down "and point at that
furniture van. Fact.
"But that wasn't the cutest thing
he ever did. Tho cutest thing he ever
did was one afternoon when I took
him down to the Santa Barbara beach
for a walk on tho sand. I hadn't any
sooner got him down to the beach
than he sat down and began to point
out to sea. I couldn't for the life of
me make out what he was painting
at. There wasn't ary a bird, not even
a seagull, in sight. But he kept right
on squatting there at the verge of the
sea and pointing out over the water
and if ever a man was puzzled, then
I was. At first I calculated that lie
might be mistaking the crests of the
waves for feathers, but no, a little re
flection convinced mo that he wasn't
any such a fool dog as to do a thing
like that. Then I noticed that he
was pointing directly nt a white ship
that lay out in the harbor. I pulled
out my field glasses and took a lock
at the ship, and then the mystery was
made clear. The ship he was point
ing at was the United States mnn
o'-war Petrel," and then the man with
the shifty eye executed a sudden leap
and escaped from the car before his
wrathful listeners could hop on him
and macerate him.—Washington Star.
When Sjiuin Died.
Spain died of empire centuries ago.
She has never crossed our path. It
was only her ghost which walked at
Manila and Santiago. In 1030, tho
Augustlninn friar La Puento thus
wrote of the fate of Spain: "Against
the credit for redeemed souls I set
the cost of armadas and the sacrifice
of soldiers and friars sent to the Phil
ippines. And this I count the chief
loss, for mines give silver, and forests
give timber, but only Spain gives
■Spaniards, and she may give up so
many that she may be left desolate
and constrained to bring up strang
ers' children instead of her own."
"This is Castile," said a Spanish
knight; "she quakes men and wastes
them." "This sublime and terrible
phrase," says Lieutenant Carlos Cll
eum Calkins, from whom I have re
ceived both those quotations, "sums
up Spanish history."
The warlike nation of to-day Is tho
decadent nation of to-morrow. It has
ever been so, and in the nature of
things it must ever be.—Popular Sci
ence Monthly.
Tlio Foot Politician.
Whenever I hear or read of a poli
tician in office giving orders to "keep
reporters out o' here," "don't lot 'em
talk to me," "tell 'em I ain't got noth
ing to say to newspapers," etc., I can
see his finish. The lunatic forgets that
it is the newspapers, through their re
porters, that made him. Jhe suc
cessful politician always talks to re.
porters. He does not necessarily give
them the Information they seek, but
by Implication and suggestion gener
ally puts them on the right trail. Onij
tho pinlieads of polities seclude them
selves.—New York Press.
V£4' ~£ACTS. IHT>
| At Wilkesbarre, Penn., there is a
man who owns a lottery ticket issued
by a Presbyterian church in Pittsburg
as "authorized by law." It Is dated
June 3, 1807.
On the Italian stamps are Italian
towns with Austrian stamps, showing
tho long dominion of Austria over parts
of Italy. On some of the old stamps
arc marked the keys of St. Peter, sur
mounted by the miter of the Bishop of
Uomc.
j Tho reason given for tho substitution
of tho drum for the trumpet in the
! Italian army is that in these days of
short service a young soldier loams to
march to tho drum far sooner than to
the trumpet. Again, it is found tbat
trumpeters are very subject to pulmon
ary affections.
An ear will be banded down, so to
6peak, from father to son for genera
tion after generation, with compara
tively little modification. Some au
thorities on criminology assert tbat
criminals are very apt to possess a pe
culiar kind of ear. which is recogniza
ble by an expert in such matters.
Every robemalcer in London always
keeps some o£ the most expensive
robes of state—those of a registrar,
for instance—ready, and lends them
out when ofiicinls have to use them
nt any great ceremony. Many a peer,
when his portrait is to be added to
the family picture gallery, has ob
tained the crimson and ermine from
his tailor for a small consideration.
John Foe, of Mtlltown, N. J., lost
his arms thirty-two years ago, but be
can do most things that oilier men ac
complish by the aid of those members.
Says be: "Anybody can get along with
out liis arms if lie lias to. Every lime
I row, fish, hunt or plow I find a bet
ter way to do it, and it continually
grows easier to get along." Tiie arm
less wonder is not new. Mon: eigne
described an exhibiting one of the .six
teenth century in words that would fit
a modern press notice.
Among the curious insects of tho
Malay peninsula recently studied by
Mr. Nelson Annandale, of the London
Zoological Society, is one called tiie
lantern-fly, which is remarkable for its
sudden leaps, made without the aid of
its wings. It was only after lie had
carried a specimen hack to London
and carefully exumlned it that Mr.
Annandale discovered that a curious
projection on the front of its head, a
kind of nose with a crease in it, was
the leaping organ. When bent hack
under the abdomen and suddenly re
leased It sent the insect flying.
In China the mortal part of the dead
Is put under the control of a geomau
cer, a man wise In the mysterious in
fluences of Feng Shun. Feng Shun is
a superstition concerning the earth
and air forces, and it operates power
fully in all Chinese matters, but in
none more powerful than in 1 lie burial
of tho dead. That the grave should be
so located as to invite the good influ
ences and avert the evil Influences of
Feng Sliua is the great consideration,
for which tho good offices of the gco
mancer are sought—at a round price.
All graves must be protected on the
north, as from that direction the ma
lign influences usually come. Hence
the grave is placed on tho south slope
of a hill, with protective architecture
built on the hillside or, if on a level, is
supplemented by a walk, half circling
It on the north.
Wan Uncertain.
The pecuniary difficulties in which
aspirants for literary fame become
involved have inspired many an
anecdote.
"Here's a poem on the 'lmerald
Oisle,' sorr," said a frayed-looking in
dividual to the editor of a weekly
newspaper lu a large town, "an' it's
hoping you'll take it, 01 am."
"What is your address?" inquired
the editor.
"That depends entoirely on you,
sorr."
"Depends on me," echoed the edi
tor; "what do you mean?"
"If you take the poem, sorr. mo ad
dthrcss will slitill be siventy-wan
King-sthrate," replied the sanguine
poet; "but if you dou't take it. it's
mesilf that'll be left without any ad
dthress to me name. If mo landlady
lcapes her wurrd, sorr:"—London
Spare Moments.
Ills Scale of Prices.
An Oklahoma editor, who is a deep
thinker, has fixed a table of rates for
publishing things "not as they seem,"
says the Jefferson (Texas) Jiuiplecut,
as follows: "For calling a man a
successful citizen when every one
knows he Is lazier than a government
mule, ,$3.73; referring to a deceased
citizen as one who is sincerely
mourned by the entire community,
when wo know lie will only be missed
by the poker circles, $1.08; referring
to some gallivanting female as au
estimable lady whom It Is a pleasure
to meet, when every business man in
town bad rather see the devil com
ing. hoofs, horns and all, than to see
her coming towards them, if3.ll>;
calling an ordinary pulpit pounder an
eminent divine. 00 cents; sending a
tough sinner to heaven with poetry,
$3.00."
The small German university town
of Jena has no fewer than seven free
reading-rooms, with newspapers and
hooks.