FREELAND TRIBUNE.
Zstablishol 1888.
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FREELAND, PA., JANUARY 14, 11 01.
"THE FULL DINNER PAIL" ; :
"The 'full dinner pull' sloprnn wlilcli
the Republican worked during the .
late campaign was lilt upon b.v more ,
accident," said a New York newspaper J ,
man who was in the city recently.
"The Idea suggested itself one day to !
Grant Hamilton, who is the present art [
editor of Judge, but when he mention
ed It to his associates in the office tliey j
received It coldly. You see, Hamilton
comes from a small town in Ohio
where dinner palls are as plentiful as
blackberries, but in New York no j
workman would think of lugging
around such a machine, and they are |
almost absolutely unknown. None of
the fellows In The Judge office had
ever seen oue. 'What do they look
like, anyhow?' asked a member of the
staff. 'l'll draw you a diagram,' re- j
piled Hamilton, but when he attempted
to do so he found that he had forgotten
how the confounded thing looked, lie
couldn't remember whether the cup at- ;
tachment was 011 the top or the bottom.
"Just then Zimmerman, the carica
turist. came In. 'Hello, Zim!' ex
claimed Hamilton. 'Did you ever see
a dinner pall—an old fashioned tin din
ner pall, with a knife sticking on the ;
outside?' 'Did I!' replied Zim. who
boasts of having painted signs In his
early days. 'Why, I used to carry one
of 'cm myself!' However, when he at
tempted to draw a picture of the con
trivance he fell down almost as hard as
his chief. 'l'll go out and find one of
the real things,' he said, and accord
ingly he and Flohri and Tom Higgius
of The Judge art department organized
themselves Into un exploring expedi
tion and started out. After much 1
prowling they discovered a bona fide
pall at a household supply store and j
bore It baek In triumph. Hamilton
used It as u model for a 'full dinner
pall' which he Introduced Into Ills next
cartoon, und the thing made such a hit
that It was soon afterward adopted as
a campaign emblem by the Republican
national committee." New Orleans 1
Times-Democrat.
t'mbrrllfl, I-'or Savages.
Nearly 20 Englishmen are now at 1
work 011 seven umbrellas for an Ashan- 1
tee chief and Ills faithful staff. There is
nothing under the sun a chief can
wear, not even excepting a east off silk
hat or a red lined cavalry coat, so eal- j
culated to strike aw<> Into the minds of
refractory natives and so imbue tliem j
with a spirit of obedience as a "ging- I
ham." Traders when they want to ob
tain free access to the country of one j
of the hostile tribes make presents of
worn out clothing to the natives or j
even a "gamp" to a particularly obsti
nate and pugnacious chief. A London
syndicate of Gold Coast traders has
given the order and is paying for tlie
nmbrellas in question, which will be
given to bribe the vain dusky warriors.
When finished, the umbrellas will be
gorgeous beyond the dream of the j
most Imaginative negro, l-'or the chief
the present will be nearly 15 feet
across, quite a decent sized tent. In
fact, on state occasions it will be so 1
used. The handle will then be stuck j
In the ground, and six slaves will uet
as tent pegs. Tlio material from which
It Is being made is silk, and the colors
are to be "red, white and blue!" Round
the edge will be u deep, rich fringe and
on the top an elaborately chased cap
surmounted by a llritisli lion, rampant.
For the staff the umbrellas will be
somewhat smaller and less majestic.—
London Express.
C'ontlleat Picture In flic World,
The costliest picture In the world is
owned by the Duke of Marlborough, [
who bus a large and very expensive i
collection of pictures, which has come
down to him from the original Duke of
Marlborough. The rarest of them is
the Blenheim Madonna, painted by
Raphael In 1507 and now valued at
1350,000.
The picture was originally painted
for the Church of the Servi at Perugia.
It Is eight feet high, representing the
Madonna and child seated 011 a throne,
with a figure of St. John the Baptist 011
the left and that of St. Nicholas of Barl
on the right, the last two being life
size. Its high value Is due to the fact
that It Is one of the best preserved of <
the pictures of Raphael which are now
in existence. It has been proposed to
the British government to buy this pic
ture.—St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
Such little pills as DeWltt's Little Early '
Risers are very easily taken, and thoy j
are wonderfully affective in cleansing j '
th ! liver and bowels. Drover's City drug j 1
store. 1 1
"PC- PSpSgSSr
PERSONALITIES.
Hiram Maxim, the well known in
ventor. is at work on a hook on China
ami Chinese military affairs.
I>r. Stanton Colt, the lender of the
ethleul culture movement in England,
Is nn American and a graduate of Am
herst.
Count Cogni. who accompanied the
Duke of Abmzzi on his recent polar ex
pedition. has just been married to his
cousin, Signorlna Nasi.
Hon. Theodore Roosevelt will cease
to be governor of New York on Dec. 31,
and from that date until March 4 he
will play the role of private citizen.
(jueen Victoria's sight is now so had
that she is allowed to do no reading,
and a regular reader is therefore em
ployed to lead to her for an hour or
two every day.
Sidney Grundy is one of the most
productive of dramatic authors. In
one year he has been known to pro
duce live plays. He began to write at
24, and he Is now 32.
Alfred Emerson, who for the past
three years lias been a teacher in the
American School of Classical Studies
at Athens, is collecting a museum of
Grecian antiquities for the University
of California.
It is related of ox-Governor-Robert
Stewart of Missouri that while in of
fice he was asked to pardon a man
whom In- sent for from prison and then
recognized as a river steamboat eap
tain who lkid treated him brutally
while he was a cabin hoy. lie recalled
the fact to the prisoner and then par
doned him.
On Nov. o 30 years had elapsed since
Carl Schurz as a medical student help
ed tlie poet Gottfried Kinkcl. who had
been condemned to life imprisonment
for political reasons, to escape from
Spondau to England. Kinkcl subse
quently became a professor at Zurich,
and after his pardon in the seventies
ho returned and lectured in Germany,
j Sir William Ilugglns, K. C. lb. the
astronomer, lias been elected president
of the Royal society in succession to
Lord Lister. His special work has
; been in stellar photography at his pri
vate observatory at Tulse Hall. For
the last 23 years lie has been engaged
in obtaining photographs of the ultra
: violet portion of the spectra of the
; stars.
The famous blind oculist, Dr. Javal,
a member of the Paris Academy of
Medicine and director of the Sorbonne
ophthaliiialogical laboratory, has just
; been simultaneously promoted to the
highest rank in the French Legion of
I Honor and decorated with the Black
1 Eagle. This double decoration has met
with enthusiastic approbation from all
| quarters.
i The Marquis of Lansdowne, the new
British secretary for foreign affairs, is
, the twelfth statesman to occupy that
, post during Queen Victoria's reign.
( Tlie others are Lord Pulmerston, Lord
! Aberdeen, Earl Granville,Lord Malmcs
bury. Lord John Russell, Lord Claren
don. Lord Derby, Lord Salisbury, Lord
j Hosebery, Lord Iddeslcigh and Lord
Kimberly.
STAGE GLINTS.
! Blanche Walsh wears a $1,200 gown.
| Roland Reed will not attempt to act
I again until next season.
I Queenie Vassal* recently received a
: divorce from her husband, a Mr. Lynch,
j St. Petersburg has decided that the
waits between a is in a theater must
I not last more than 13 minutes.
! More than SIOO,OOO was received for
I the advance sale of tickets for the
! Bei nhardt-Coqiieliu engagement in New
| York.
| Mine. Modjeska first landed in this
country in IS7O. during the Centennial,
and made her American debut in San
Francisco.
The people of Charleston are not sat
isfied unless the manager of the thea
ter puts pictures of plays on the fences
of the town.
"I didn't want to become an actress
at first," said Bernhardt. "1 wanted to
become a great painter, but my parents
wouldn't let me."
"Tlie Worst Woman In London" is
the title of a recent successful English
play which is likely to soon be repro
duced in this country.
Julia Marlowe has fixed a charge of
30 cents apiece for her autographs, the
money to go to the Actors' Fund of
America. A St. Louis man recently
forwarded $3 for one.
Among the prominent stars who are
next season to act plays written by
American authors are Richard Mans
field, Tim Murphy, Ada Rehan, Henry
Miller. Julia Marlowe, William Gillette
and Kntliryn Kidder.
••Robert of Sicily," tlie new play in
which Joseph Iluworth is to star this
season, is a romantic legendary drama
based on Longfellow's poem of that
name. The dramatization has been
made by Grace Livingston Furniss.
ITEMS OF INTEREST.
Seventy years ago it took a day and
a half to go from New York to Phila
delphia.
There is a flavor of Celtic salt in llie
London Telegraph's criticism of a cer
tain new play as "a brilliant specimen
of gloominess."
Professor Young estimates that a
train running from the earth to the
sun at 40 miles an hour would take
about 203 years for the trip.
Prussia does not permit cremation,
but does not forbid the export of
corpses to Bremen, Hamburg, Hesse
or Thurhigift, where they can be burn
ed.
The Colonial Novel,
At this point General Washington
was introduced into the colonial novel
for the purpose of foiling the villain
thereof.
But the villain was not easily to be
daunted.
"Sir," exclaimed this person, address
ing the distinguished patriot, "I am
somewhat acquainted with contempo
rary history, and unless I am mistaken
you are at this moment crossing the
Delaware, consequently j'ou cannot be
here without violating the unities."
Upon looking the matter up in his
diary General Washington found that
this was indeed so and accordingly,
with a low bow to the ladies, withdrew
from the story.—Detroit Journal.
Only I'oshllilc Reason.
Dude (just after his rejection)—H'ml
I wonder if my collar didn't seem to
lier to be of the latest style!—Meggen
dorfer Blatter.
In the slk lit n f Man.
Rachel—You ought to join our Crazy
Quilt Literary club. Some member is
selected to spring a sudden topic, and
then all the rest discuss it.
Elizabeth- What was the subject at
last week's meeting?
Rachel- -Eiinore Eggleston opened
the talk oil'"Men as Close Observers,"
and we bad an almost acrimonious ar
gument on the proper lengths of short
skirts.—Denver News.
Didn't Flay Them.
"No," said young Mrs. Torkins,
"Charley never plays the races."
"Are you sure?" inquired the caller
in a tone of suspicion.
"Quite sure. I went out to the track
with lilin and watched him. That
wasn't play. It was work."—Wash
ington Star. ,
Not Hxtrnvuunnt.
Mrs. Newliwed—The idea! lie says
I'm extravagant!
I Ler Mother—Well, dear, perhaps
you're not as economical as you might
be.
Mrs. Newliwed—Oil, but I am. Why,
I never buy a blessed thiug but bar
gains.—l Miiladelphia Press.
An Accomplice.
Mrs. Bnggins—That little boy next
door is always blowing putty into peo
ple's eyes with a blowpipe. I'm sur
prised that his father doesn't make
him stop it.
Mrs. Muggins—Well, be won't, nis
father is an eye doctor.—Philadelphia
Record.
Lacked an Attribute.
"That politician is as stubborn as a
mule."
"Yes," answered Senator Sorghum,
"the trouble about Dim is that he
hasn't as much pull as a nuile."—Wash
ington Star.
No Courtship Is Lckul Without It.
Every engaged man gives Ids girl a
copy of "I.ueile." and every girl who
is engaged reads it. Otherwise there
are 110 buyers or readers of the book.—
Atchison Globe.
Ill* Idea.
Miss Skyleigli—Are you a married
man?
Mr. Frankleigb—No, but I'm the next
thing to it. I'm in debt.—Smart Set.
I.CHN If It txOCH Down,
"What do you do when meat goes
up?"
"We eat less and enjoy it more."—
Indianapolis Journal.
The Mystery of Koine.
"Rome had the best roads ever
known."
"And no bicycle vote, either."—De
troit Journal.
Distinctly the Thing:.
Tin* soais arc hard, the crowd is ruuKh,
The rain beats down fbr keeps,
The very atmosphere is tough.
I! r heart gives trembling leaps
To see dear brothers Jim and Pick
With other youths full blooded
Punch heads and run, pull huir and kick
In football jeans bemudded.
"It's gnat!" the rootrrs shout ami sing.
She mutters, with a shuddgr, "Yes,"
because it is the thing.
rile air was thiek, the dust was dense,
The crowd surged up and down
llcfore the n<>hj (ranted daubs immense
By artiste "t the town.
'Twas hustle licra and bustle there,
Midst dowagers and lions,
A < opley beau with uncombed hair
Praised one of Kargcnt'f scions.
"What dulcile work! See the swing!"
She gasped for breath, said archly, "Yaas,"
it*'cause it was the thing.
If I his same maid of Boston cult
Had lived some years gone past.
When France's minions in revolt
T1 -e sable fiends of hell surpassed,
She'd been adjudged not tit to live
And to the guillotine be sent,
The thirsty teowd no mercy give
'Tis peasants' way not to relent.
"Make haste," they'd yell. "Your turn to
1 suppose she'd answer sweetly, "Yes,"
Because it was the thing. *
—Bcston Globe.
A FREAK OF NATURE.
1 Dane In Arlsonn Which In Made of
Soda.
Probably few people ever beard df a
: soda (lain, but such a freak of nature
I really exists in au unfrequented part
of tlie great west. A. O. Wright of
; the Indian service, who travels ex-
I tensively through that section of the
; country west of the Missouri river, in
speaking of strange things he has en
countered in his tours alluded to the
soda dam. Asked what he meant by a
soiia (lam, he said:
"In Box canyon, just above the hot
springs of the Jemez river, Arizona, is
.i dam extending from one wall of the
gorge to the other. This dam is noth
j ing more or less than a massive wall
i jf pure soda, rising to a height, of 100
feet, and probably GOO feet from end
to end. Nature's forces, of course,
started their work of construction
away back in the dim and distant
past, when deposits of soda contained
in the water thrown off by the springs
were made at the base of what lias
since developed into one of the natural
wonders of the west. Those deposits
must have been made with remarkable
rapidity.
"Just ten years ago the Jemez river
rose to an unprecedented height, and
under the abnormal pressure of the
torrent a lower section of the dam
gave way, leaving a breach in the wall
of soda about 20 feet high. When the
water subsided, the lake formed by the
dam was, of course, destroyed, leaving
the upper 80 feet of the dam high
and dry.
| "I passed through that section of
Arizona this last summer, and pur
| posely visited the soda dam. I was
: most astonished to see that the 20 foot
| breach had been nearly tilled in. The
soda from the springs bad made fresh
deposits, aud gradually patched up the
hole made In 1800. At the present rate
the breach will be entirely closed in
; another year and the lake will assume
: its former proportions.
I "Previous to the break iu the dam
the lake above was fully GOO feet wide
and extended up the canyon for at
least three-quarters of a mile. Sci
entists who have examined the dam
j are of the opinion that it will never
1 attain a height much above 100 feet,
for the deposits iu the water seem to
sink in that great depth before the
brink is reached. As they fall, how
ever, they will tend to strengthen the
base of tlie dam and will gradually
decrease the depth of tlie lake at its
lower end."—Washington Star.
The font of Heroes.
Now that we are all thinking of he
roes it is interesting to note that heroes
are sometimes very costly luxuries,
though the heroism of the C. I. V. lias
been very cheaply purchased. The
Duke of Marlborough cost the country
! something like a round million of mon
ey in cash and palaces. In 1707 a pen
sion of £4,000 a year was granted to the
! duke and was paid to his successors
i till 17 years ago. when it was com
muted for £107,780. Nelson's heroism
lias been paid for nt about the same
rate. Up to now the hero of Trafalgar
has cost England £580,000 in pensions
and grants, and us there is £S,(KM) a
year waiting for all the Lord Nelsons
forever and ever tlie Nelson bill will
run up to half a million for every cen
i tury the title lasts. Up to now the
Duke of Wellington lias cost the nation
more iu hard cash than Nelson, over
three-quarters of a million having been
paid to him and his descendants, but
as the pension was limited to two gen
erations the present duke is the last of
i his line who will profit by ,his anees
| tor's heroism. —London Chronicle.
FitrklnK Apples For Export.
"The Canadians are far ahead of us
| in the matter of packing fruit for ex
i port," says a business man quoted by
! the Kennebec (Me.) Journal, "and
1 consequently tliey have less trouble
in disposing of the fruit. Look at our
present method of shipping apples. An
old flour barrel, dingy and dirty on the
outside and white with flour on the In
| side, is tlie usual way our apples are
packed for the foreign market. As the
fruit shrinks they become loose In the
I barrel, and the rolling of the sliip or
I jarring of the cars causes them to be
bruised and disfigured. By the time
| they reach the buyer they are badly
damaged, or at least present au un
sightly appearance to the eye. We can
never build up a European trade until
( this matter is remedied."
Jupn I'se Arabic Figures.
There is one tiling which strikes a
foreigner as being particularly strange
in the uniform of the Japanese soldier,
says a writer in North American
Notes and Queries. This is that the
numerals which he wears upon his
shoulder straps, to denote the number
of liis regiment, are European num.
liers, not Chinese or Japanese ideo
graph. For instance, the soldiers of
the Third ffeglment just wore a 3 upon
tlieiis sliouSder straps. I found upon
inquiry that this was because the Eu-
I ropenn numbers were so much more
I quickly and easily distinguished from
I each other than the complicated Chi
nese characters. A truly practical na
| tiou the Japanese!
Makes Them Thin.
! Ncodesbn, Kan., lias a population of
about 1,500, which includes more thin
people than any place twice its size in
America. Many ot the men weigh less
than 1(K) pounds, though in good
health. Physicians say that the petro
leum and paturai gas wells there are
, responsible for making the people look
like whitened refugees from a famine
I district In India.
WANT PALEFACE HUSBANDS.
Inducement* Temporarily Offered by
the Maltmseons Indian*.
An edict has been issued by the Ma*
lungeons Indians, who live in the
mountains of Hancock county, Tenn.,
GO or more miles from Mlddlesboro,
giving the maidens of the tribe the
right to choose their husbands from
the palefaceH. Formerly this was a
violation of one of the sacred laws of
the tribe, and the girl that married a
white man was banished from Indian
society. lut now the chief men have
decided that the daughters of the tribe
should secure paleface husbands, and
as an inducement they are offering to
every white man who will take an In
dian wife from 50 to 100 acres of moun
tain land. The number of acres of
course depends on the quality of the
husband, and the man who comes well
recommended will get a better wife
and a better farm than the man who
does not.
But the Malungeons only want the
best of whites, and hoboes need not
apply. The applicant must be honest
and industrious and of good character.
He must also give a solemn promise
that he will forever eschew the daugh
ters of the paleface nation, which, in
effect, is that he will love and protect
his Indian wife as faithfully as he
would one of his own race.
The Malungeons made this offer be
cause they came to the conclusion that
their race was doomed and that the
only way to save it was by amalgama
tion. Continuous intermarriage among
the Indians is resulting in Inferior
progeny. After a few jpears, it is said,
the Malungeons will return to their
old law of marriages only among their
own race.
The Malungeons number about 150.
They are the last of a once numerous
and powerful race older than Tennes
see itself. A tradition among them is
that they are descendants of a colony
of Portuguese, who amalgamated with
the Cherokee Indians hundreds of years
ago. Another legend is that they are
descendants of the Lost Colony of
Roanoke and the redskins. The Lost
Colony of Roanoke was composed of
English settlers, who made their home
on the eastern shore of Virginia. The
Malungeons are thrifty farmers and
honest and upright as a general rule.
They are brown skinned and black
haired and have regulur features.—Cin
cinnati Enquirer.
Orator* In Congren.
"The most iiulshed orator in the
house of representatives is Cousins of
lowa. He has," says Ainslee's, "been
in congress now for four terms, and In
the eight years of his congressional
career he has made two speeches. Yet
so line were they that his reputation
on account of them is national. One
was half an hour In length. It was
a witty and eloquent criticism of Em
bassador Bayard, at the time Bayard
was making himself unpopular by his
pro-English remarks at London din
ners. The other was less than five
minutes long and was spoken after the
destruction of the Maine. Cousins sat
silent in ids place for one full term be
fore he ever opened his mouth. It is
more than two years now since he last
spoke. When he takes the floor again,
he will have gn attentive audience.
"The most effective orator in the
house up to the time he was transfer
red to the senate a little while ago
was Dolliver of lowa. Llttlefleld of
Maine, Laiulis of Indiana and Bailey
of Texas are three who have the ora
torical gift.
"In order to gain a conspicuous posi
tion either in the house or in the sen
ate, u man must generally be a good
talker, but it does not always follow
that the silent men are without influ
ence."
Wine Tasters at the Fair.
The jury which made the awards In
the wine departments of the I'arls
exposition had iili.ooo brands of wine
to taste. It would seem that such a
task would he enough to paralyze the
nerves of every man's palate and that,
moreover, the wine tasters would have
some dllllculty' in getting home after
their day's work. These useful mem
bers of a reputable profession, how
ever, know their business far too well
to be led Into any mistakes of that
kind. It is estimated that not a quart
of wine was swallowed by the cntlro
committee while engaged In the test
ing. If they drank much, they would
soon lose their sense of taste.
When testing wines, these men take
but a small mouthful of the sample,
let it slip hack to where the taste uerve
is aud'then spit it out. After trying
three or four samples the taster will
chew a mouthful of dry cheese, eject
It and wash out Ills mouth. This fresh
ens up the power of taste, and the
Juror goes nt Ills work ngnln.— Chicago
Record.
A Naval Coincidence.
On the -Ith day of March next two of
ficers well known to the navy will re
tire from the active list. These officers
are Rear Admiral Hlcbborn, U. 8. N.,
chief of the bureau of construction and
repair, aud Pay Inspector Henry G.
Colby, U. S. N„ both of whom will
reach the age of G2 years on the same
date. It has occurred to very few offi
cers to retire for age on the same date
with others, for as numerous as are the
birthdays in the navy similar dates are
rare, and still rarer are ages Identical.
Next Centnr, People.
The American will be taller by from
one to two inches In the next hundred
years. Ills Increase of stature will re
sult from better health due to vast re
forms In medicine, sanitation, food and
athletics. He wllkJlve ,10 years Instead
of 35 as at present, for he will reside In
the suburbs. The city house will prac
. tlcally he no more. Building In blocks
will be Illegal. The trip from subur
ban home to office will require a few
mluutes only. A penny will pay the
fare.— ladies' Home Journal.
TOO LATE!
The Sad Tale of Horatio aad (lw
Hearlleaa Tailor*
"Horatio! Horatio! Horatio!"
It was the voice of a mother caniof
to her only son from the back door, but
there was no answer. When aha had
called again and again, with Ilka're
sult, she ran across the lawn to a vlna
embowered summer house where Ha
ratio sometimes went to read his Vir
gil.
"Ah, yon nre here!" she called as she
looked In at the door and espied him.
No answer.
"Horatio, Horatio, my son, what la
It I Are you aßleep?"
No snores reached her maternal ear*.
"The dear boy Is asleep, and I will
leave him thug. But what Is this letter
In his hands? Surely a mother can
rend her son's letters. Is he In love?
No; It Is not tlint It Is a note front his
tailor saying that he cannot press new
wrinkles Into his trousers before to
morrow. Wake, Horatio, and yonr
own mother will heat the flatlrons and
do the pressing herself. You shall not
be disappointed."
She laid her hand on his forehead. It
was ns cold as an Ice trust Bhe felt
of his heart. It had ceased to tunk.
The note from the tailor had strnek
home, und Horatio Colllngwood was as
dead as a herring. M. QUAD.
Him Further Report.
"I would like to report, sir, that bur
glars entered my house last night" he
said to the segeant at the police sta
tion.
"How much did you lose?"
"Two $lO bills out of my vest pock
et."
"And do you suspect any ono?"
"Yes, sir; I do. I would like to fnr
ther report that I am perfecly certain
that my wife got up In the night and
hawked on to that money and to add
that all the policemen In the United
States can't senre It out of her. That's
all, sir. Good day, sir."—Chicago New*.
A Great Advantage.
Mrs. Snaggs—The position of queen
has Its advantages.
Mr. Snaggs—Well, that's not a new
Idea, strictly speaking. But perhaps
you will tell me what prompted the
remark?
Mrs. Snaggs—l have been reading of
the fact that Queen Victoria never
wears a pair of new shoes until they
have been worn n few times by one of
her dressers whose foot Is of the same
size ns her majesty's.—Pittsburg Chron
icle-Telegraph.
Brother Dlcltey'a rhlleaophr.
De only trouble 'bout de los' sheep la
It takes too many people ter hunt 'em.
Dey any dat hell IB paved wld good
Intentions, but It's my belief dat hell's
too hot fer even good Intentions tar
locate dar.
Dey say dat Providence Is long auf
ferlng, but my speunce Is dat de po'
man Is heap mo' long sufferln dan any
body.—Atlanta Constitution.
An Inadvertent Error.
Front the Bowersvllle Clarion: "By
a mistake In making up the paper last
week we put In an Item stating that HI
Slocunt had moved to Philadelphia un
der the head of 'Obituaries.' Error*
like tills creep In occasionally In the
best regulated offices, and our only ex
cuse Is that our foreman used to live In
Philadelphia."—Baltimore American.
Tun Would S.y "O'wuP
"What nre the cable rates to China 7"
"Eh! What do you want to know
for?"
"I want to secure Prince Tuan for •
.10 night lecture course at SI,OOO •
night."—Cleveland Plain Dealer.
A. Par a. We Knew.
Tcnchf ' . - Adalbert, can yon tell
why King Richard was called of tb*
lion heart?
Adalbert—l s'pose It was because ha
btllered when he was hungry.—Chi
cago News.
L'nrearetttnif.
There eln't no use o' t.lldn 'bout the melinehoty
d.y-
Not to me.
I was Rood an tired o' lummer 'fore the dM
went their ways,
Don't you BP*.
An I like to nee the branches by the norther*
breezes tossed,
An the yellow leaves t huetlln till they're eertete
to get lost,
An to keep the flre a-blazin, never eountln up tfca
coat,
Like 'twas free.
I was weary o' the perfume o' the rosea anyhow
When they died,
An the birds an frogs an inaecka made aa lrritatia
Far an wide.
Here's the apple red an shiny an the cider taatet
immense,
An the turkey, he's a-atruttifi, an the aqulr'l is on
the fence,
So 1 quit thia here rcpinin, fur I reckon Provi
dence
Will provide.
—Wuhlnftwt Stall