Kreeiand Tribune
Established 1888.
PUBLISHED EYKRY
MONDAY AND THURSDAY#
BY THB
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paper money since 1866 have aoibeeu
less than a million a year.
It costs 82 to take a bath at Capo
Nome, but little complaint comes
from there on that account. Com
paratively few of the people up there
have fouud it out as yet.
—TW
Mrs. Lillie Devereux Blake has
beeu elected President of a woman's
suffrage association which will admit
men to membership. Why this con
sideration for the hereditary enemy?
The English Government, acting on
the experience gained in the war in
South Africa, promises to do certain
things for the Volunteers. Mr. Wynd
ham announced them as follows the
other day: (1) They were sending offi
cers to Switzerland to examine the
Swiss rifle ranges; (2) that they in
tended to help Lord Wemyss's scheme
for a Volunteer Reserve by granting
free ammunition; (3) that they would
encourage every Volunteer regiment
to form a company of mounted in
fantry, but mounted on bicycles and
not on horses, for which purpose there
■would be a capitation grant; (4) thai
there would be a graduated series of
capitation grants for shooting; (5) that
the Voluuteers would have transport
on the same scale as the Militia; (6)
that the Volunteer batteries would be
rearmed with modern artillery. It is
elear that the publio attitude toward
the Volunteers is to bo changed, now
that they have shown how useful and
necessary they aro.
It is not much if any over twenty -
five years sines five cents was the
lowest price for a Chicago paper, be
cause no smaller coin was in circula
tioiA And now it is reported that
bargain counter prices have created a
demand there for half cents. These
aro supplied by private manufacture,
but tho Director of the Mint is dis
posed to think that the demand for
these coins is so general that tho
Government ought to strike them.
Twelve-and-a-half cent prices are
common euough, but in the East, at
whose use of cents the West sneered
very lately, there is not much objec
tion to paying thirteen cents, or ii
that seems unlucky, to giving a quar
ter for two.
An ingenious schotne iu the interost
of charity is being put in practice with
much success iu several cities. Thero
is hardly a home anywhere in which
thero is not moro or less super
annuated furniture, discarded utensils,
outgrown clothing, etc., which is of no
use under the sun to the family. The
methods advocated is to gather in all
euoh "trash" that is worth while,
tako it to a ceutral point, sell it off at
auction, and devote the proceeds to
some charitable purpose. Iu somo
places a local auctioneer volunteers
his services in selling the goods, free
of charge. The plan enables poor
people to buy useful articles at reason
able cost and realizes a nice sum for
any specified object besides.
The number of prisoners in Eng
land and Wales in 1870, according to
tho London Chronicle, was 29,050;
and the number of scholars was 1,
093,059. In 1899 the scholars had in
creased to 5,601,249; and tho prison
ers had decreased to 17,687. Tbe
number of prisoners regularly de
creased iu this period as the number
of scholars increased. In 1870 one in
fifteen was in school, and one in 853
in prison; iu 1899 one in six was in
school, and one in 1775 in prison. Of
the prisoners in 1898, 20.3 per cent,
could not read or write; 77.2 per cent
could read and write imperfectly, and
only 2.6 could read and write well. A
very fow wero unclassified. And yet
some tell us that education does not
affect crime.
Karl ncauchamp is to resign at the
end of the current year from the gov
crnorship of New South Wales.
WE FORGET.
00 many tendor words and trao
We meant to say, dear love, to you;
Bo many things we meant to do,
But we forgot.
The busy days were full of care;
The long night fell all unaware;
You passed beyond love's pleading prayer,
While wo forgot.
Now evermore through heart and brain
There breathes an undertone of pain.
Though what has been should bo again.
We would forgot.
; Wo feel, we know, that there must be
Beyond the veil of mystery
Some place where love can oleurly see
And uot forget.
| —Ada Foster Murray, in Harper's Magazine.
jfl R u n a^a i M ato| ij<
JOHN ASLEi', Jr., was n tall
youug mau about twouty-two,
and as bo gazed wrathfully at
bis father the old mau almost
quailed before him.
Old John Asley was of tbe "old
school," whatever that may meau.
Aud youug Johu Asley was of tbe
"new school," very uew, in fact, went
in heavily for athletics, rau up a big
bill at college for "Dad" to pay, aud
then skipped over to the continent,
and there, being up to 'date, fell in
i love with a very pretty girl, aud, of
course, wanted to marry her.
Now, old John Aslcv not only had
no sympathy with his sou's matri
monial schemes, but ho rather re
garded the youug man aud all his
likes and ambitious as altogether un
heard of, and, therefore, dangerous
and to be frowned on.
i It was natural that he should plan
' for John to enter his office nud learn
! the ways of business. The old man
! felt sure it was rank heresy aud reck
j less foolisliuess to let the boy marry
! till he had grounded himself iu busi
j uess aud its methods. Now the boy
I wanted to marry Miss Bennett at once
aud learn the rudiments of business
'■ afterward.
j This did not suit the old man. He
| admitted that he would not be so
j averse to the marriage if the young
lady had any money. They dismissed
I the matter some time,
j Old Johu Asley knew that hiß son
had his own stubborn aud unresisting
i temperament and he changed his
i tactics. He suggested that Johu have
his aunt ask the girl to a "dinner party.
John's aunt presided at the few euter-
J tainments the old man gave. This
j was arranged nnd the invitation dis
' patched to "Miss Giaco Bennett,
; No. Madisou avenue, New Yolk."
This was the address she had given
Johu aud told him it was a friend's
house where she should spend the
winter. Her acceptance came by re-
I turn post.
The evening of tbo dinner arrived
and the splendid house was decorated
aud ablaze. John's eyes sparkled
when he led Miss Bennett up to intro
duce her to his father.
"Father, this is Miss Bennett," he
said.
He saw his father give the girl a
puzzling look and hoard him stitle an
exclamation of surprise. Then he
noticed that the girl was blushing and
seemed in some way ill at ease.
; "How do you do, Miss Grace," said
his father, with the easy familiarity of
an old man. "We are very glad to
Bee you here." Then some one else
came up aud the girl hurried away.
Several tirnos at dinner John saw
hiß father glance at the girl and then
shake with silent laughter. His hot
blood deoided that his father was
ridiculing the girl of his choice and he
determined to call him to account for it.
He drove Miss Bennett to the sta
tion to catch the late New York train
himself, and when he got back he
found his father still up. The old man
became silent and refused him any ex
planation. All he would say was that
if Miss Bennett ouly had as much
money as Alice Cooper he would with
draw all his objection;, nnd make John
a liberal allowance.
Miss Cooper was a daughter of an
ex-resident, who, dying, had left his
only child, Alice, a large fortune.
John had never seen the girl and
thought then that he never wanted to.
In the middle of September youug
John announced that he was going to
New York and would liko some funds.
The money was forthcoming and the
old mau oven chuckled as he handed
John the notes in away that only
made matters worse.
John went to New York, taking
nlong Midnight with him. Ho was
j too much attached to the horse to
leave him behind, and looked forward
| to some delighted gallops with Miss
Bennett.
For two days he hung about the
hotel, fuming aud trying to make up
his mind to call on Miss Bennett. One
morning he decided to take a ride iu
the park before breakfast.
Midnight was a handful nnd needed
all his attention for some time. After
a good gallop he quieted down and
began tp act like a rational horse
again.
John was walking him along the
bridle path aud came on a little crowd
of persons, including some of the park
workmen and a mounted policeman.
Standing near the group was a hand
some Kentucky saddler, trembling all
over and showing unmistakable signs
of having run away. The aide saddle
on him was hanging on his flank and
his month dripped blood from an in
side cut. There was blood on the po
liceman's arm, His horse was quietly
watching the proceedings with mild,
steady eyes. He had seen so many
similar accidents that it was really
quite a bore to him.
John drew Midnight up and tried
to get a look at the person they
eeemed to be bending over. As he
pushed his way into the crowd he
caught a glimpse of the face and ut
tered an exclamation of surprise and
horror wliea he saw it wa& Miss Ben
nett.
"Do you know this young lady?"
asked the policeman.
"Yes," said John; "she is Miss
Grace Bennett and lives at . Is
she hurt?"
"That we can't tell for sure till the \
ambulance aud the surgeon come, j
But we don't think so. They always j
faiut. She is a loug time coming to, :
though."
Tho rubber-tired ambulance came I
silently up and the surgeon was be- l
side the girl before tbe vehicle stopped. ;
Ho made a superficial examination
with professional dexterity, aud said;
"This is not the ordinary faint from
terror. She must bo takon to her
home at ouce, or the hospital."
Tenderly she was lifted iu aud John
gave the address. He rode on before
to let her aunt kuow of the mishap.
Running up the steps he asked for
Mrs. Peter's, tho girl's aunt.
"Miss Beuuett was thrown from hex
horse and they are bringing her here
in an ambulance. It is nothing ser
ious, I am sure."
"Miss Benuett, Alias Bennett," said
tho lady. "I don't—or, yes, of
course. And are you Mr. Asley?"
Iu the excitement it didn't seem
strange to him that sho knew who he
was at ouce.
They carried tho girl to her room
and inside of half an hour two sur
geons and a trained nurse were by
her side. The surgeons shook their
heads aud looked very grave. All at
tempts to arouse her had failed. She
lay in a stupor and her soft breathing
was the only sign of life.
When tho surgeous said an opera
tion was necessary John's hopes fell.
Soon auother surgeon aud another
nurse and some suggestive-looking
boxes aud cases arrived. Then John
tramped the long drawing-room wait
ing for the doctors to come down and
tell him if she lived or not. The
sickly-sweet smell of ether carno float
ing down stairs as the door of tho
chamber was opeued, and he heard a
sing-song voice that ho knew uttering
meauiuglesH words.
Then the door shut, aud as ouo of ;
the nui sos came down he waylaid her. !
Before he hud a chance to ask she told
him the young lady was coming out of
the ether nicely, aud the doctors had
found a tiny piece of bone pressing on
tho brain. But they felt sure she
would be all right with care.
All that loug afternoon he stayed at
the house aud hoped he might be of
some service. Fiually he fell asleep,
worn out with all the anxiety and
misery. He was awakened by a touch
on his shoulder aud found his father
standing over him. Here was more
mystery.
"How's Grace?" he asked.
"Alice is better aud will be all right
soon. The girl up stairs is Alice
Cooper. She was Miss Benuet in Eu
rope to protect herself against a lot
of fortune-hunters. I knew her when
sho came to the dinner party, und
liavo seen her frequently since her
father moved away from our town.
But I thought I would let you find
out for yourself. I haven't any further
objections, and after the wedding wo
will talk business."
John demanded entrauce to the
sick room at ouce. There was really
no proposal, only, "Oh, John," and
"Oh, Alice." —Hartford Times.
National Ulflerenceßin Locomotive I'owei
American locomotive engineers
deem it advisable to design their en
gines with a large margin of power.
If an express engine is designed to
take a 200-ton load at fifty miles an
hour, aud if that load should happen
to be increased to 3CO tons, the loco
motive is still expected to be able to
take it aud keen time, and usually
does so. Suck, at any rate, is the ex- 1
perieuce of such au impartial and
level-headed observer as W. M. i
Acworth. If an American express bo
late at one point of its journey, the
engine is expected to make up the
lost time, even if the load be larger ,
than usual. And, again, this is gen- >
erally done.
But if an Euglish engine is given a
single coach above its prescribed load, !
the driver at once insists upon having
a "pilot," aud commonly he gets one.
Or should the weather be bad, with
strong side wind or a slippery rail, ho
demands an assisting engine and is
accorded one, as a matter of course, j
Obviously, this applies especially to
the case of single-wheelers, which are
so largely used on some English rail '
ways, because their range of power is
much more sharply limited by adverse
conditions than is the case with
coupled engines. But iu either case
it seems indisputable that a smaller
range of power is given to au English :
locomotive tkau to au American.—En- i
giueering Magazine.
The Clolli or Ceremony.
One of the Tibetans was dressed in !
white, one in black, with square-cut
caps, Tartar physiognomy, very dark !
complexions, and long pigtails, and I
were well known to our people. They
approached us making many polite !
bows, and, taking of! their caps, pre
sented tho cloth of ceremony, as was
beco'miug from in/eriors to superiors. |
This is a form which is universal in
Tibet, and extends into China, I
though I do not remember ev.er to i
have heard an explanation of the cus
tom. The cloth we received was of
cotton, badly woven, but of fine tex
ture. about the sizo of a small band
kerchief, but so dirty as to show that
it had frequently performed similar
offices of civility before. The more
wealthy classes employ silk instead of
cotton cloths, the legend, "Oin mane
padme hum," being commonly woven
iu damask at each cud. Tho sale of
these cloths of ceremony, I was given j
to understand, constitute a Govern- ,
ment monopoly in this part of Tibet.
—Sir Richard Ktrackey, in the Geo- :
graphical Journal.
FEAR THE PEOPLE.
ADMINISTRATION FORCES ARE
ON THE RUN.
| The President In Anxious to Get Con
gress Off His Hands —The Reign of
j Gold and Militarism Shows Signs of
j Collapse.
"Early adjournment" is now the
slogan of the administration Repu'o
j licans. President McKinley has ad
' vised certain members of congress that
he thinks June 1 a good time for ad
journment. In other words, the presi
f dent would feel more at ease if his
| own congress were not continually em
phasizing the blunders which he so
readily makes without any assistance
at all. Mark Hanna is credited with
having given the administration the
j luminous idea that congress would
only continue to pile valuable cam
paign material up for the Democrats
and that it could not be gotten out of
the way too soon. It is estimated that
the appropriation bills can be rushed
through by June 1. and there really
isn't very much else in sight.
As to the insular possessions the
program is imperialism with the ad
ministration as sole director. It is
thought that with the Puerto Rican bill
once out of the way the bill continu
ing military rule in the Philippines can
easily be put through by the Republi
can majority.
The Hawaiian bill has already been
voted on in house and senate and now
goes to conference. It contains plenty
of loopholes for the perpetuation of
contract labor slavery, and that is the
one thing which the sugar planters
want. The bill provides that civil
prosecution shall supersede criminal
action in case a laborer breaks his con
tract. But it has been amply proved
that the civil courts imprison the la
borer until he is ready to return to
servitude, so that is satisfact. ry to
those who find such labor a great
j cource of profit.
Smothering Legislation.
The Republicans have a general pro
gram of smothering in committee ev
erything which might embarrass them.
On this theory the Cour d'Alene inves- |
tigation is being drawn out, in the |
hope that if the military affairs com
mittee reports at all it will be too late
for any extended discussion or definite
action.
The army and navy appropriation
bills are pretty well under way. They
ask altogether an appropriation of
about $200,000,000 for the fiscal year.
The administration is piling up the ex
penses of militarism until they come
very close to the expenditures of the
great continental powers. There has
been some desultory talk of a reduc
tion of war taxes. The Republican
leaders in congress plead want of time
in which to handle such a measure,
but the real reason is that they do not
know where to begin lopping off the
taxes. If they make a reduction which
appeals to the popular mind they will
offend very important special interests
and vice versa. So on the whole it is
likely that the people will be permitted
to pay war taxes until they register
their opinion of that and several other
pieces of administration policy at the
polls next. November.
Gen. Otis' Retnrn.
It is now definitely stated that Gen.
Otis is to return from the Philippines
at an early date. Of course he is not
i "ordered" home. He has merely been
notified that be had better return at
his earliest convenience. He will prob
ably be glad to drop the whole task
and let the new commission potter
around and theorize during the rainy
season. It is suggested at Washington
that the new commission is going to
the Philippines to investigate and ex
plain what the former commission, of
which Admiral Dewey was a member,
managed to accomplish. Nobody ex
pects that any commission will do any- j
| thing of value, but it will furnish Me- j
Kinley with an excuse for making
campaign promises about the rainbow- I
tinted future of American imperialism j
in the Philippines. The administration !
is possessed with a comfortable delu
sion that the voters of the country only
need to have its Philippine policy
j "explained" and all will yet be well.
As a matter of fact, there are indica
tions that Washington is about the
1 only place in the country where the
administration policy is not thorough
ly understood and condemned. And
the lack of understanding here is con
fined to the administration and its fol
lowers in congress,
i The sick list In the Philippines is
\ growing so rapidly that the sick sol
-1 diers are to be huddled like cattle on ;
I board transports and sent home. The |
I hospital room is needed in Manila, and
! it is now discovered that the two ex
-1 pensive hospital ships, Missouri and
1 Relief, are practically unseaworthy, so
| the sick soldiers must take the long j
journey in actual discomfort if not ab- 1
j solute privation.
Admiral Dewey's Candidacy.
j Admiral Dewey's announcement of
j his determination to be a candidate for
, president crystallized the vague fear
| thai had been noted in administration
j circles for some time. McKinley has
made so many blunders that his op
position in his own party is growing
formidable. Dewey's announcement
spread such consternation in the ad
ministration ranks that the Republic
ans hastened to discredit and belittle
even his Manila exploit. They were so
afraid ami anxious that tlrey could not
confine their criticism to the admiral's
lack of political knowledge and his ev
ident Ignorance of the gravity of pend-
I ing political issues. The Democrats
j met his announcement by reiterating
! their intention to nominate Bryan,
j D.'iwey could not possibly be the Dem-
I ocratlc candidate, and the Democrats
could afford to give him full credit for
his great victory.' His action did not
! interfere with their plans. It is true
that Dewey says, "I am a Democrat of
the Cleveland type." That and his re
port on the Philippine commission are
sufficient. In so far as he has any
! political convictions he stands for im
perialism and militarism. It is said
that when he ha 3 made up his mind
on a few other important issues he will
give out a statement of his beliefs.
Outside of the caused in
administration circles by his announce
ment the general feeling In Washing
ton was one of commiseration that so
gallant a gentleman should, in his ig
norance of matters political, have made
so ill-advised an announcement. It can
bring him no honor, and rather de
tracts from the great naval
to which he is so justly entitled.
The House and Puerto Rico.
The house Republicans now have the
opportunity of re-establishing them
selves in the respect of their constit
uents and the entire country by declin
ing to pass the Foraker Puerto Rican
tariff and government bill. The ad
ministration leaders will try to force
a vote on Wednesday (April 18) and
allow only a few hours for debate.
Many members are absent on both
sides, but the Democrats will probably
manage to get back more of their ab
sentees than the Republicans. The out
come is very problematical, but the
Republican leaders believe that noth
ing is to be gained by delay.
All the Republicans who voted
against the original tariff bill still hold
to the same opinion, and there is sharp
protest from others that the govern
ment bill creates an oligarchy of
which the administration is the su
preme head. The Puerto Iticans can
be taxed without representation, val- .
uable franchises can be given to ad- j
ministration favorites the island can j
be managed by "carpetbaggers," and
neither its inhabitants nor the people
of this country have any voice in the
matter. If the house Republicans pass ;
this obnoxious measure they certainly
will have to reckon with an outraged
public sentiment next fall.
JACKSON DAY. j
MILITARISM AND TRUSTS.
"Added to those declarations will be |
an attack upon imperialism and the ;
trusts, both of which owe their exis- J
tence to the fostering care of the Re- i
publican party, and how nearly akin
are these creatures of toryism: im- '
perialism, which would conquer and
tyrannize over foreign peoples, and j
the trust, which represents the impe- 1
rial power in control of industry. '
There is the railroad magnate and the j
monopolistic captain of industry, who '
rule with sovereign power and sneer
at democratic methods and business as j
contemptuously as a czar. I for one :
believe that time will demonstrate that j
the imperialistic policy of this admin- j
istration is deliberately demanded by
the monopolstic forces which control ,
the Republican policy. I believe these
men well understand that military
force is the sole instrumentality i
through which they can continue their
domination of our government, hence
they welcome any foreign policy whict
will involve a large standing army,
and what their purpose is in dealing
with protesting labor receives its per
fect illustration in the military gov
ernment which has prevailed for many 1
months in Shoshone county, Idaho, ■
where, for an offense against property |
committed by a few men, hundreds of
citizens have been imprisoned, held at
the point of the bayonet, deprived of
their civil rights and subjected to civil
wrongs which even the czar of Russia i
would hardly practice with impunity, !
and at this very moment the rights of ;
miners to labor in the Coeur d'Alene ia
and for months has been regulated by :
an officer of the United States army, I
who seems to be as distinctly undei
the command of the mine owners as 11
lie were their private employe."—
George Fred Williams, at Rhode Is
land Democratic convention.
WHERE AIR YOU, M'KINLEY? j
We've been huntin' you, McKinley, but
we don't know where you air;
When we clap our fingers on you, why, '
we iind you're never there. I
When we hunted through the tariff, in j
the place you'd ought to be,
Why, you wasn't 'round there nowhere,
least as far as we could see.
in this Puerto Rico thingumbob we
thought we'd find you sure;
When we got there you'd been trek
king, like the smooth and wily
Boer;
So we asked the gold supporters 11
they thought we'd find you there,
And they said they guessed so, some
place, but they didn't just know
where.
Alger said he hadn't seen you, and he
shed a bitter tear
When he said you'd gone an' left him
like a sinking ship last year.
When we visited Mark Hanna, who
was busy countin' pelf,
Why, he said he couldn't tell us, fer he
didn't know hisself.
So we've just kep' on a-huntin' till
we're nearly petered out,
And, although we thought we had you,
now we find we're still in doubt.
If these lines should ever reach you,
and you'd write us where you be,
You'd confer a good-sized favor oh
your friends, the G. O. P.
Republicans Not Connulteri.
The administration organs are bit
terly denouncing the platform adopted
by the Democracy of Nebraska. It
should be borne in mind, however, that
the Democrats who drew the platform
never once considered the matter of
pleasing the Republican organs.—Oma
ha World-Herald.
OUR BUDGET OF HUMOR.
LAUCHTER-PROVOKINC STORIES FOR
LOVERS OF FUN.
A Trying Moment—lll. GronC Appr.cla
tion—Her Yea™ and Her Desire—His
Apt quotation—Circulation Impeded—
The Fish Story, Etc., Etc.
Her father has a million and
Is twice as big as I!
Last night I held her little hand—
Her father has a million nud
I've promised her to take a stand
Aud make hloi yield, or diol
Her fatiier lias a million uud
Is twice as big us II
I promised her that I would go
And tell him all to-day—
I wish I weighed a ton, for, oh,
I promised her that I would go —,
And make him yield, or die, nnd so
A ton is what I'd like to weigh—
I promised her that I would go
And tell him nil to-dny!
—Chicago News.
His Great Appreciation.
Fersistent Bride—"Will you love
me just as much when I am dead?"
Bridegroom (absently)—" More, my
darliug."—Tit-Bits.
Her Years and Her Desire.
She (dreamily)—"lam twenty-three
years old day after to-morrow."
He (astonished) —"And you would
tell your age for a box of caudy?',
His Apt quotation.
"Now," said the callow dude, "you
may put some brilliuutiuo ou my mus
tache."
"Ah, sir!" quoth the intelligent bar
ber, "first you must catch your hair."
—Philadelphia Press.
Circulation Impeded.
"Dorothy, how do you know you
are in love with that man?"
"Oh, whenever I see him my heart
beats faster and my nose turns cold."
—Detroit Free Press.
The Fish Story.
Bill— "Did you notice his eyes
sparkle when he was telling that lish
story?"
Jill—"Yes, but you know he said
himself that ho couldn't believe his
own eyes."—Yonkcrs Statesman.
Poor Little Chap !
Auutie—"Joey, I've washed your
face four times to-day. I guess you
wish your mother would couio home."
Joey—"No; she's worser. She
washes it I'm morning till night."—
Indianapolis Journal.
What Ho DOOM Willi Hi*.
Politicns—"Tho question is, What
shall we do with our new [losses*
sions?"
Youugkub "I'll tell you what Ido
with mine; I walk the floor nights
with it." —Harper's Bazar.
Could Search Him.
•4f jgij
j[ *x
Oom Chimpanzee—"Where in thun
der is my umbrella? I had it a min
ute ago."
Ostrieh (thickly)—"Dunno you
cau search me." —Judge.
A Long lteacli.
"That British commander iu South
Africa would m ' t a great boxer."
"How's that?
"Why, the paper says that he swung
his left forward about two miles aud
struck a savage blow."—The Harvard
Lampoon.
IhißHtisfled.
Fretful Child—"l want to look at
the moon!"
Weary Father —"Well, why don't
you. It is l ight up there iu the sky.
Look at it as muok as yon please."
Fretful Child —"Aw, I waut to look
at the other side of the inoou now!"—
Harper's Bazar.
Unainlitble.
"I see those friends of yours, the
Rustlers, hnve their names iu the!
paper again," said the lady who is in
terested iu social topics.
"Have they, indeed?" responded
MiBS Cayenne, languidly. "I didn't
know the deliuqueut tax list had been
published again!"— Washington Star.
Hare Family Plate.
Visitor—"l suppose that plate on
the mantel is a very rare piece of
china of priceless value?"
Hostess—"The value is largely sen
timental, but it certainly is a rare
piece. It was in use for two yean,
and uever so much as cracked by any
of our servants."—Philadelphia Press.
Account Current.
Manager—"What are you doing
there: erasing in the books not al
lowed?"
Bookkeeper—"l am only erasing a
blot that I made."
Manager—"Erasing is not per
mitted all; make simply on tho oppo
site sido another blot, and it will theD
balance."
Alter Joyft.
"I don't thiuk Mrs. Betterdays ever
enjoyed her money so much as she
does now."
"Why, she lost her money soma
years ago."
"True, but then, you see, it has sup
plied her with an unfailing topio of
conversation ever since."—Kansas
City ludepeudeut.
HOUSEHOLD MATTERS.
How to Clenii Marble.
Tlio best way to clean marble is
mix tro parts of powdered whiting
r/ilit ouo of powdered bluing and half
e, j)int of soapsuds, and heat it to the
boiling point; while still hot apply
willi a soft cloth to the discolored
marble and allow it to remain there
until quite dry, then wash oft* with hot
water in which a little salts of lemon
has been dissolved. Dry with a piece
of soft flannel.—Ladies' Home Jour
nal.
Tim of Itot-Wntor llasi.
A hint in the use of hot-water bags
is gained from a trained nurse. Very
little water is used, not more than a
roffeeoupful in a three-pint bag, but it
is very hot. Before the stopper is
screwed in, the air is pressed out of
the bag by a quick smoothing of the
hand toward the opening; in this way
the weight is considerably lessened.
Tus particular nurse in attending a
pneumonia patient kept in uso during
the severity of the attack six of the
hags, three of them upon the patient
at one time. During periods of the
critical two or three days, the bags
were changed every fifteeu minutes,
hut so light were they that their weight
did not in the least iucouvenience the
uufforcr.
Tin; Practical I'icturo llnugor.
The practical housekeeper of to-day
who h.'i9 u number of fiuo pictures to
hang saves timo and trouble and se
cures better results by calling iu the
practical picture hanger. This man
has coino to bo a necessary adjunct of
nil well-regulated art establishments.
His ability to sound a wall or drive a
v :ii with precision is but a minor fea
i lire of his calling. The day has passed
v. u-u pictures are hung by rule and
method, just so many feet from the
floor, and each equi-distant from its
neighbor. Picture hanging nowadays
is an art that requires judicious treat*
n." iL in order not to spoil the effect of
wo. l; artistically conceived. As to tlid
Imaging of pictures in general, it it
c i.si.l.m l best nowadays, says an
authority iu picture bunging, to hang
black and white independently, and
s.i with colored pictures. Paintings,
of co tr.se, require the most careful
consideration in the hanging, and even
the professional makes mistakes at
ii lies. The pictures must bo hung
according to the lighting of the room.
Iu some rooms the window arrange
ments are such that it is fiext to im
possible to hang a painting so as to
get an effective lightiug by day, and
in others the artificial lightiug ar
rangements are such that at night the
paintiug ceases to be a pioturo and be-
I comes a blur. To obviato these diffi
j cultias a trained and artistic eye is a
necessity. In general, declares this
PiiMl O man, the old rules about hang
ing certain kinds of pictures iu desig
nated places have died out. For in
stance, the old-time fruit and game
piece, without which no well-regulat
ed dining room was formerly com
plete, has been relegated to compara
tive obscurity. In its place has come
the print suggestive of merriment and
good cheer.
Kecliten.
Molasses Cake—Ono cup of mo
lasses, one-half cup sugar, one-half
cup bntter or lard, one teaspoonful of
soda dissolved in one-third cup of
buttermilk or hot water, two eggsand
ouo teaspoonful of ginger. Flour
enough to make stiff batter; bake in
moderate oven.
Buttered Spaghetti—Boil one-half
pound spaghetti twenty minutes in
salted water, then dip in cold water
to separate it. Place it at once in the
oven, in a hot dish, and pour evenly
over it two tablespoonfuls of hot but
ter, in whioh has been delieately
browned a tablespoonful of fine bread
crumbs.
Creamed "Krout"—Boil one quart
of "krout" in two quarts of water for
one honr; then put it in a colander to
draiu. In a saucepan cream two
tablespoonfuls each of butter nnd
flour, then add one pint of milk or
water, and lustly the drained "krout."
Stir constantly until it oommenceß to
boil; then serve.
Fried Cabbage—Chop cold boiled
cabbage and drain very dry, stirring
in a little melted butter, pepper and
salt with three or four tablespoonfuls
of cream. Heat all in a battered fry
ing pan, stirring until smoking hot,
nnd then let mixture stand just long
enough to brown slightly on the un
der side. This dish is improved by
the addition of a couple of beaten
eggs.
Scalloped Veal—Veal is nice scal
loped with macaroni or spaghetti. To
make the white sauce, melt a table
spoonful of butter in a saucepan, and
cook one tablespoonful of flour in it
for three minutes without browning.
Add one teacup of milk, and oook un
til thickened. A bay leaf may be
cooked with the milk and removed
when it is done. This gives a pleas
ant flavor to some dishes.
Lemon Jelly for Pies—Boat the
Voiles of two eggs and one-half cupful
of sugar to a cream, add the juice and
grated rind of one lemon and a cupful
of water and set on the stove to boil.
Thickeu with one tablespoonful of
cornstarch moistened in a little water.
Use only one crust, and when the pies
are baked oovor with a frosting made
of the beaten whites of tho eggs nnd
two tahlospooufuls of powdered sugar.
Bake iu a quick oven until a light
brown.
Virginia Peanut Soup—Roast, and
shell sutficient ponnuts to measure
tbrco oups, Touud them to a paste,
adding a level teaspoon of salt, Place
this paste in a saucepan and add, very
gradually, two quarts of boiling water.
Season with a dusting each of black
and red pepper nnd simmer until it
lluckcns. Just before serving add a
pint of oysters and a saltspoon of
celery seed and cook until the oysters
rnllle. Crisp crackers nlxeuld accom
pany the soup.