Freeland Tribune
Established 1888.
PUBLISHED EVERY
MONDAY AND THURSDAY,
BV THE
TRIEUNE PRINTING COMPANY. LimM
OFFICE: MAI> STREET ABOVE CENTRE.
FREELAND, PA.
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port promptly to this office whenever paper
is not received. Arrearages must be paid
when subscription is discontinued.
Ma' e all monty orders, cheeks, eto,,payable
to the Tribune Printing Company, Limited.
The new Hessian special taxes on >
bachelors anil bicycles looks like wan- ,
ton discrimination against two of the j
principal amusements of young worn- ;
en.
The United States can furnish ex
cellent counsel 011 the disarmament
question and also excellent battleships
if Europe insists on more war mate- |
rial.
French Canadian papers and men |
are still lamenting the exodus of mem
bers of their race from the Province
c* Quebec, and they say that unless I
checked it means death to French- j
Canadian influence in the Dominion. (
The automobile, with its big pneu
matic tires, is a road builder, and not I
a road destroyer, like the heavy, nar
row steel tired vehicle. The more ;
automobiles there are the better will
it be for our roads. From every point !
of view they should be encouraged.
The story of the heroism of Mme
Dreyfus i.s oue of the brightest pages i
in the history of the century, and the
age may well rejoice in the belief that
hers is not an exceptional case, hut
that the world is rich in hai ingmillions
of wives as faithful, as devoted and as
heroic as she.
A Daltimorean who has been n close
student of household economics has
recntly made a comparison of the
weight of paper with the weight of
food supplies purchased. In one day's
purchase it is said that the paper
wrapping amounted to about ten per
cent, of the total. In a list of sup
plies costing about $1.90, he found
that the paper which was weighed
with the provisions cost 11 3-4 cents.
He claimed that this was altogether
out of proportion.
The growth of the Christian En
deavor societies, whose eighteenth in
ternational convention has been held
in Detroit, is without precedent in the
history of church work. Iu 1832 the
few societies then iu existcn • • had 481
members, and in lstfj the u ruber en
rolled had advanced to '2*7 . Then
the member-blip iu -reuse i f 1 8905
in 1884 t< 11, 0 in 1887, to . \ )Q0 in
1880, to 1 H),O 1 ) in 1887, ;o >. ),)!) in
1888, to 500,00 j in 133'\ to V, ) >,OOO in
1890, until now it has 55,819 societies
and a total membership of more than
3,500,000. These figures prove con
clusively that this movement has been
directed by masters of organization j
and leadership, that its purposes have
appealed to the poj ular heart with ir- !
resistible force, and that it is destined i
to a still greater growth and larger I
usefulness.
Original measures have been taken
in Charleston, S. C., to protect lire- j
men from the danger of contact with
live electric-wire-. By the terms of
an ordinance on the subject each com
pany buying the right to string elec
tric wires must connect its station
with the lire-alarm system, and ou the
occasion of each lire-alarm must send
an emergency wagon and one or more
competent men, with necessary ap
paratus and tools, to the locality of
the fire, where they must act under
the direction of the officers of the lire
department. In addition, a special
signal has been arranged, in obedi
ence to which the electric c unpanies
must turn off the electric-current iu
the district of the lire. Heavy pen
alties are provided for neglect to coin
ply with the ordinance, and they are
cumulative for each day of neglect
Luteal in Lift: Belts.
.U. Janet, a Frenchman of Bauvals,
.finds that four toy india rubber bal
loons attached to a yard of whipcord
make a swimming belt or life buoy.
The balloons should only he half full
In order to resist the waves better.
This life belt can easily be carried in
the pocket and inflated nr. need.
Kepi Iliisy Digging Cellars.
"I ain't only got hut one objection
to bein' moved about, house an' all, by
these 'ere cyclones," remarked the-vet
cran farmer. "What Is that?" asked
the eastern tourist. "Why, I've got t'
dig a new cellar under my house about
ever' two months."—Ohio State Jour
nal.
ThfE LADDIE WHO WAS ALWAYS
J, COINC TO DO!' 1
Thoro lived long ago, in a town I once
know,
A laddie who nhvavs was "going to do"—
Koine act of grout valor, some deed of re
nown.
Some glorious foat that would wia him
Fame's crown.
His hopes,they were many, his doubts were j
but few,
This bravo little lad who was "going to
do."
Dut nlas! While ho dreamed, while he
fusliioned with care
Tho wonderful castles he built in the air,
Ills tasks were neglected, his lessons un
learned.
Life's homelier duties and pleasures were
spurned.
From childhood to youth and to mnnhood
ho grow,
Still boasting of till he was "going to do."
The wealth he had hoped would be his to
corn in and,
Was granted to others, who worked while
he planned.
The honors for which in his funoy he
schemed,
Wore showered on others, who dared while
he dreamed.
So many bright chances had passed him,
that few
Were left for tho lad who was "going to
do."
At last ho awoke from Ids visions so bold,
To find himself friendless end cheerless
and old!
No mighty achievement had blazoned his
name,
Ha never had mounted tho ladder of Fame.
Not one of tho wonderful dreams had
come true
That were dreamed by the lad who was
"going to do."
—lda Goldsmith Morris.
03300000CQ3000000G00000000
I THE BOY THAT DARED. 8
Q By Warren McVelgli. Q j
000000300000003C0030000000
,i|i| .IT - VERY street ur-
A|| ■ chin knows that
I/ ' - n/n ' 81 u P ° n New
\! ] ! 1 {Hi 1 York ' B * reat
1 I East Side, at
I' 1 a'l the foot of
H Eighty-sixth
II w Street, is a va
'"vX\yß*Pfa cant sand lot.
■jipkf'l The lot is trian
-Bu|ni in Bha P e '
7)7 q sod one end of
.tew>£3w\ f| f, \t\) it juts, noselike,
t '■!'/ /-"A' Jl l,: f \ ' out into the East
ky Kiror ' This
i I little nose of the
sand lot is called "The Beach" on the
upper East Side,and every afternoon in
the summer time there gather here hun
dreds of boys, who, clothed only in
short trunks, spend hour alter hour
in the water, drying themselves after
the swim in the hot sun, or in front of
an improvised tire.
tt was here that The Boy That Dared
was to be found ou a certain very hot
afternoon not so long ago. James
Jaekson was his name, but January
was what they all called him; why, no
body—not even January—knew.
If January were to be pitied, he cer
tainly did not know of it. His life
was comparatively comfortable. In j
the summer ho loafed and slept iu the |
open air. Iu the winter ho did about
the same thing, ouly he slept in stables
aud hall doors. Twonightmareshehad:
the police and the Children's Society. |
Brass buttons were the emblem of j
both nightmares, aud January hated j
brass buttons.
January was the leader of a "gang."
That is the proud emineuoe to which
every little wharf-rat aspires. To be
a leader of a gaug one has to swim
better, figbt better and excel one's fel
lows in all other blanches of athletics
and art, and January so excelled. Aud
above all things, January never "took
a dare." Lots of boys will tell yon
tbey never took one, but there are
mighty few who cau say so truthfully.
January was the one boy who never j
had backed out of any task set for him
by his comrades, aud so they looked
up to him and thought him the finest
leader a gang had ever had. A gang,
it should be said, is not the horrible
thing the world makes it out to be. It
is simply a little clan of boys who
stand by each other when there's a
snowball battle going on, and who
treat each other when there are any
pennies in the exchequer.
It was a hot afternoon, then, and
January and his friends were dress
ing themselves—or undressing them
selves, rather for a swim. There were
about twenty boys in the party, and n
great overgrown mongrel our to watch
the clothes while the hoys were iu
swimming.
Pedro was very warm himself, aud
would have liked nothing better than
a dip in the water, but a heavy fog lay
down over the river and the beach,
and Pedro knew that if he but left the
clothes for one instant somebody might
creep up in the fog aud steal them.
So at the word of command from
i January, he threw himself down on
; the hot sand and put oue great paw ou
i top of the little pile of old trousers
and shirts tlint did duty as clothing for
his two-legged friends.
All undressed, the boys Wore about
to make a dash for tho water, when off
iu the fog they heard the tooting of a
steamboat. A few seconds later the
strains of a brass baud came over the
water. The boys stopped and listened.
Tbey could plainly hear the churuing
of tho steamboat's paddle-wheels, aud
tho strains of tho I ud, and the
laughter of those on board. Pedro,
who didn't like music, howled.
"SVhat's dat?" asked a very young
member of the party.
"Picnic," said oue of his elders, and
then, whooping aud howling, they ran
down tli 1 beach. Suddenly a pierc
ing shriek catne through the fog. The
boys stopped short agaiu nnd looked
at each other. Again the shriek came
over tho water to them.
By this time tho excursion boot was
very near to them. Tho shrieks of a
woman plainly told all they wanted to
know.
"It's a kid," cried January.
"You dnssn't," exclaimed a boy near
him, and January and all the rest of
the orowd looked at him.
"Don't do it, January," said half a
dozen of his friends, but the leader of
the gang was on his mettle now.
"I dassn't, eh?" he chuckled, and
then with one leap he was in deep
water and going with the side-3troke
like a youg seal in the direction of the
excursion boat. All this had taken
but a second, and the next moment
the half-hearted crowd ou the beach
saw Pedro dart by them and go head
first into the water after his friend and
master, for tho dog had scented the
danger.
January swam with all his strength,
and pretty soon he made out on the
tap of the water a little bundle of
clothes bobbing arouud. The boy
knew then that the child had, by some
miracle, taken kindly to the water and
escaped so far with its little lungs
empty. Two or three strokes brought
liiui to its side, and he grabbed it with
one hand and turned over on his back
and began to float. He plaoed the lit
tle one on his breast, and looking into
its pretty blue eyes began to pet it
with the few homely words his untu
tored soul suggested to him. A moment
later somothing cold touohed the side
of his face, and turning his head he
saw his dog.
"Hello, Pedro,"he chuckled; "look
at the kid. Ain't it pretty?"
Pedro snorted and then swam around,
ready to render any assistance thai
might be needed. Then the boy heard
the dipping of oars, and he knew that
the steamer had lowered a small boat,
so he held on to the baby firmly, aid
called out to the men in the boat with
all his might. A few minutes later
the small boat came alongside of him,
and he and the child were hauled into
i it. ■ ■
January reached the deck of the
steamboat, and a woman threw herself
upon him and began to cry. Another
woman, evidently the child's mother,
had the little baby in her arms, hug
ging it to her heart to warm it a lit
tle. Men flocked about January, and
one of them handed him a dollar bill.
"T'anks," said January, and he
thrust the dollar bill underneath his
trunks. '
"My brave lad " began another
man. January scented a speeoh.
"What you giving us?" he snorted,
aud then he went over and patted the
baby's wet cheek. The little one
looked up at him and smiled from ear
to ear.
"3o long," cried January, and be
fore any one could stop him, lie quickly
mounted the railing and plunged into
the river. When he caine to the sur
face again he was quite a distance
from tho steamboat, and Pedro was
there waiting for him.
"Come ou, old Pedro," cried
January, and so they swam back to
the beach.
"Well," said January, as he pro
duced the dodav bill and showod it to
the admiring gaug, "I dassn't, didn't
I?"
Through the fog came three shrill
whistles from the steamboat. It was
j saluting January, and the leader of
i the gaug and all the rest of tho gang
gave three cheers in answer. Then
| January and his friends finished their
i swim, and that night they spent
j January's riches at the outdoor circus.
; —Saturday Evening Post,
Kxnmple* <>f Old-Fashioned Dentistry.
Deutistry, like other usefel arts,has
progressed with the times. There was
a time when aching teeth were be
lieved to be inhabited by devils in
durance vile, nnd all sorts of charms
were used to drive out the trouble
some domous. Even to this day those
who suffer the tortures of toothache
wonder if the old theory is not cor
rect. A certain Thomas Lupton in
1C27 gave the following directions for
tooth extracting:
"To draw out a tooth, fill an
earthen pot with emets or ants and
their eggs, nnd set the same pot in
hot embers so long until all be burned
into aslios; and when any doth nice,
which you would draw forth without
pain, then take of the same powder,
and touch tho tooth therewith, aud it
will fall out."
It is told that Dr. Tushmake, of
Boston, invented an instrument for
pulling teeth that lost him all his
friends. It was "a combination of the
lever, pulley, wheel and axle, inclines!
plane, wedge and screw. A child of
three years could, by a single turn of
the screw, raise a stone weighing
tweuly-tkree tons," says ;Johu
Phconix. That was in tho days when
IUOU wore cumbersome metal plates
supporting falso teeth in their mouths,
tieuernl George Washington was noted
for a gold toothplate of this sort,
which was rather large and puffed out
his lips nnd cheeks notioeably.—Chi
cago Record.
riiotoKruiilts Lightning Flashed.
".Scientists," says the Philadelphia
Record, "are much interested in a fad
which \V. N. Jenuings, of Philadel
phia, has been indulging in for tho last
eighteen years, and which, they say,
has proven of much value to them. No
thunderstorm of any moment passes
over the city, 110 matter whether it is
dny or night, that does not find Mr.
Jennings, arrayed in a specially con
| structed rubber suit, 011 top of his
house, photographing tho lightning
Hashes. When the enthusiastic pho
tographer lirst started this amuse
ment with his highly sensitized plates
110 spoiled huudreds of them before
110 could obti-in any satisfactory re
sults. Finall r, after two years of fu
-1 tile effort, he discovered the right
J plan, and now his success is wonder
i ful. This work is considered so im
• portant that Kelvin, the world re
j nowned scientist, has placed himself
j in communication with Mr. Jenuings
i in order to secure the earliest news of
any discovery which the Philadelphia
scientist may make."
In Norway the average length of life
1 is greater than in any other country
I on the globe.
Simplicity of THgal Women.
The natives of the Philippine
islands —that is the pure bred natives
or aborigines—are called Tagals. They
are of the Malay race and are about as
wild aud unsophisticated as any of tho
savage peoples of the world.
They are not an ill-favored race, and
some of the women are very pretty.
TAGAL PEASANT GIRL.
The illustration is made from a photo
graph of a native Tagal peasant girl.
Her family evidently has had the bene
fit of contact with civilization, as her
dress indicates. Some of the Tagal
women dress elaborately, but in the
country places, it is said, they are
wholly uueouscious of the feeling of
modesty as applied to dress so com
mon with womeji of Europe.
Fight lletween Camels.
Two camels were brought into the
grounds at the back of the palace and
made to face each other. They were
male animals, whose vicious tenden
cies had made it necessary for them
to be kept from the rest of the cattle
and who had been carefully fed in the
chieftain's fighting stock as being
especially powerful animals.
At a signal from the prince the
creatures were let loose and shambled
toward each other. At first they mere
ly feinted aud skirmished about in
clumsy fashion, their long, awkward
legs an irresistibly ludicrous sight.
Presently they began to foam at the
mouth, their faces became contorted
with fury, and a sort of fencing match
took place.
Their heads darted from side to
side, and they strove to seize each
other with their teeth. They groaned
and roared furiously, and tlie specta
tors were soon worked up to a high
pitch of excitement.
At length one camel seized his enemy
by tho leg, while the other, a large,
long-haired animal, retaliated by laying
hold of his opponent's ear. Blood
flowed freely, and opinion was divided
as to which camel would be tho vic
tor.
At last the long-haired came!, whose
grip 011 his adversary's ear was not
very firm, suddenly let go, but the
other continued to hold ou to his an
tagonist's leg aud even to drag him
about, roaring with pain.
The prince eventually gave the or
der to separate the combatants, but it
required tho efforts of nearly a dozen
men with ropes, chains and cudgels to
put an end to the affray. Even then
tho wound on the leg of the van
quished camel was so serious that 1
believe tho poor creature was crippled
for months.-—London Globe.
Goethe'* Misnon Found.
The Goethe Society, of Vienna, has
just discovered the real story that lies
back of Goethe's beautiful creation of
"Mignon," which has passed into so
many songs and even into an opera.
This story runs that in 1764 au Ital
iau equilibrist, named Caratta, went
to Goettingen with his troupe. Iu his
company was a child, evidently of good
family, who took her part with marked
reluctance. The report soon spread
that the child had been kidnapped by
Caratta, but he fled, aud escaped all
inquiry.
The fate of the eleven-year-old Pe
trouella, as she was called, caused a
great sensation iu Goettingen. Young
poets of the town wrote on tho theme, j
and Daniel Scliiobler, one of the uni- !
versity students, collected these poeuis !
into a volume. Soon after Sohiobler !
went to Leipsic, whore he was thrown
much with Goethe, aud told him the
sad talo of little Potrouella. A decade j
later this Petronella became oue of I
the most charming of poetic creations, j
—Goethe's "Miguou."
A Slrunjro Spring.
Ferkaps the most extraordinary
apring iu tlio world is that which
guskeH up from Ihe truuk of au oak
tree at Ouchy, Switzerland. The tree
is au old oue aud of immeuso size,
and it is a mystery just how the water
ever forced its way up through the
truuk from a hole through which the
little stream of clear, cool water,
babbles out as from a fauoet. The
villagors regard this tree as endowed
with miraeulous properties aud many
visitors come to Ouchy to see the
strange sight.
SBSBiaOBiBBim
| NEW YORK FASHIONS. I
j| Designs For Costumes That Have Be- f|
come Popular in the Metropolis.
NEW YORK CITY (Special).
Checked tweed iu brown aud beige
made this stylish skirt, which may
form part of a cycling or golf suit, or
be used for general outing or rainy
day wear. The skirt comprises four
gores and displays the sUeath effeot
at the top with a pretty flare from the
knees to the lower edge.
The front gore is of narrow width
at the top and joins to wide circular
side gores shaped with underlaps,
over which the front gore closes with
double buttons aud loops, as shown,
or with buttons and buttonholes, if so
FOTTR GORED BICYCLE SKIRT.
preferred. The centre back gore is
gathered closely at the top, the ful
ness being invisible under the deeply
laid plaits that meet closely in back. I
This arrangement gives necessary j
saddle room when mounted aud a be
coming flare when off the wheel. i
A deep underfacing of the material :
held in place with rows of stitching I
about an inch apart finishes the lower
edge of skirt. A smooth interlining of
hniroloth is recommonded to insure
both safety and style.
To mako this skirt will require
three and one-fourth yards of material
forty-four inches wide or two and one- |
MISSES' \VAIBT!
lialf yards of fifty-four-inch material
for short length, and two and throe
fourth yards of forty-four or two and
one-eighth yards of fifty-four-inoh
material for full length.
A Charming WuUt.
Mauve drap d'ete, velvetof a darker
shade, white corded taffeta and irregu
lar insertion are stylishly united in
the charming waist illustrated in the
large engraving. The pretty bodice j
decoration of velvet iB finished separ- 1
ately and applied over the completed
waist. It may be used as an acces
sory, for other waists may be worn '
with low pompadour neck and short
sleeves for evening dress. The full
fronts are supported by fitted linings
that close in center back, the square
yoke of corded or tucked taffeta being
applied over the lining. The collar is
of taffeta to match the yoke facing.
The two-seamed sleeves have becom
•ng fulness at the top and are ar
rauged over fitted linings, the wrists
being decorated with bands of velvet
and insertion to match the bretelles.
The mode presents opportunity for the
introduction of three contrasting ma
terials, which is ofttiuies desirable
when remodeling misses' waists. The
bretelles may be of some material dec
orated with braid, ribbon or passemen
terie, the yoke and oollar facing being
all-over lace underlaid with satin in
white or some becoming color.
To make this waist for a miss four
teen years of age will require one and
one-half yards of material forty-four
inches wide.
The Correct Thing to Wear.
Shepherds' plaid woolen materials
in black and white, petunia and white
and gendarme blue and white are the
very height of fashion just now for
making up into skirts, and the correct
thing is to wear a short jacket or coat
made of saiin-face amazone cloth to
match the color of the check material
of whioh the skirt is made. The fancy
shape revers and collar are faced with
I the shephe-ds' plaid. White crystal
| buttons nre used to d-corato doable-
breasted and open-fronted coats, and
certainly look more stylish than or
dinary bone buttons.
Lisle Thread Gloves.
Thread gloves, having for years
been the joy of the simple and sen
sible, have recently been taken up
with a rush by the fashionable and
rather freakish element. This is
chiefly because with their capital
suede lisle gloves the manufacturers
have achieved a cotton hand covering
that fits exuctly aud smartly. Thread
gloves in a variety of soft tones are
very preferable to silk, and women
with pretty, plump hands and arms
wear elbow Bleeved muslins in the
afternoon with flesh, pink or lilao
suede lisle gloves reaching to the
crook of the arm aud end of the
sleeve. One potent argument in
favor of these hand covering is that
not only are they cool, perfect protec
tors against sunburn, but they wash
just like lisle thread stockings.
Foulard HH Populur an Ever.
The craze for foulards has by 110
means abated. In fact, as the season
advances so are more patterns sprung
upon the market. They are all of the
very softest, satiny order, very differ
ent from the hard combination of silk
and surah of yore. The most popular
colors are a mixture of blues and
white, but pink and black, and eveu
mauves, have been in great demand.
A Rage in Jewelry.
The butterfly is becoming the rage
for everything, just as the bowknot
was a while ago. When enamelled in
natural colors it makes a pretty pin
for stocks and the hair. As brooches
Bet with preoious gems they are be
| wilderingly lovely, aud add to the
' fineness aud daintiness of lace,
!A Novolty in Comba.
Pompadour combs, iu real or oven
, imitation shell, are considered the
; best taste by many. If set with semi
precious stones or genuine jewels they
are prettier in dark hair than the plain
shell.
Suslte* ot Chilton and Silk.
Wide sashes of crepe de Chine,
chiffon, hemstitched taffeta aud soft
i
Liberty silks in evening shades or in
bright Roman stripes are telling items |
of dress. They fasten with a rosette j
and a second rosette catches the ends !
together a few inches below tho waist. !
On tho Wearing of Veils.
White veils are becoming only to
brunettes, to women with very large
eyes or a brilliant complexion. Black
veils with big dots should be worn by
; women with large features. A plain
l mesh is the most genteel in appear
ance.
Child's Frock.
White dimity is here daintily as
sociated with fine tucking and lace in
sertion which is sold all ready for yok
ing. The fashionable square yoke
forms the upper portion from which
depends the full front and back, that
hangs in graceful folds from gathers
at the top. A deep frill of Valenciennes
lace edging outlines the yoke, stand
ing out stylishly at the shoulders
over the moderately full sleeves. The
CHILD'S FROCK.
sleeves are gathered on the upper and
lower edges and oompleted at the
wrists with bands of insertion and
frills of narrow lace edging. A nar
row frill to match finishes the neck;
It is a verv popular stylo.
A-&RINGIN' HOME THs COWS#
It ain't no fun a-lioi-iug corn—
Th© sou it's b'illn' hot,
And pa he keeps n feller just
A-goin' at a trot.
You bet I'm glad to sre the sun
A-shinln' through the boughs,
'Cos then it's time for rne to b©
A-bringin' home the cows.
Sometimes I finish out my row.
But mostly, Unci© Bill
He says, "Just drop your hoe, my son,
I guess you've got your 111 I;
I'll takoyour row on out from here,
You whistle for old Tows©
And go and hav© n little fun
A-briniu' homo the cows."
And when the cows is 'cross the erica
I strip and swim across
And drive 'em in the swimin' hole
Aud then I ket*h old Boss
Bight by her tail and hang on tight—
Gee! how the old girl plows
Right through the water—lots of tunl
A-brlugin' home the cows.
Then when I got up to the barn
J?a he picks up a stick
And says, "Young man, I've told you 'noagk
To keep out of the crick!"
And then I say, "Why, ra, they went
Across the crick to browse.
And I jest had to stfim across
A-briugln' homo the cows."
It ain't no fun in winter time—
You git k etc Lied iu the dark
And hear the big owls hootiu' and
Them big red foxes bark;
The snow's a-fallln' and the wind's
A-bowlin' through the bough'—
It's lots of fun iu summer, though—
A-bringln' homo the cows!
—Harry Douglas Robins, iu Puok.
PITH AND POINT.
"She doesn't seem to know her own
mind." "That's because she can't
locate it."
"Golightly boasts that he never
changed his mind." "Ho can't; no
one will swap with him."
"What does the forecast bulle
tin sav?" "Threatening weather.''
"Threatening what—sunstrokes or
chilblains?" —Chicago Record.
"The first writing was done on
stone," remarked the wise man, at
dinner. "Great gracious! Think of
the postage!" involuntarily exclaimed
the rising poet.
"My daughter," said the father,
"has always been accustomed to all
the luxuries of wealth." "Yees," re
plied the count, bristling up. "Zat
ees what I am."
Depositor (breathles ly)—"Is the
cashier in?" Bank Examiner—"No,
he's out. Are you a depositor?"
"Yes." "Well, you're out, too."—
New York Weekly.
Her Father—"No, young man, my
daughter can never be yours." Her
Adorer—"My dear sir, 1 don't want
her to be my daughter—l waut her to
be my wife."—Tit-Bits.
Doctor (to tho ruffian) —"Your eye
is hopelessly smashed. I shall have
to insert a glass eye." "No glass eye
for me. It would be broken to-mor
row. " —Fliegende Blnetter.
Mae—"Both George and Harry are
very attentive to Bess. I wonder
which of the two she will accept."
Ethel—"lf I knew which would pro
pose first I could tell you."
"I'd like to look over some of your
collars," said the young man in the
haberdasher's. "Oh! then you want
to see some of tho low styles," re
plied the dealer. —Youkers Statesman.
"When I rejected Dick he didn't
seem a bit put out. I can't under
stand it." "Well, I can. Dick is
used to it. He used to write poetry,
and get u dozen rejections every
week."
"Excuse me, but it seems to me
that I must have met you before.
Are you not a brother or a near rela
tive of Major Gibbs?" "No; lam
Major Gibbs myself." "Ah, indeed!
That explains the remarkable resem
blance."
"Mr. Spoouamore, will you please
tell me what you came to see me for?"
"I will, Miss McCurdy. I came to
ask you to marry lue." "Well, I cer
tainly won't. Let us now enjoy tho
evening. Do you play chess, Mr.
Spoouamore?"—Roxbury Gazette.
<'hinHe Tcb'Knipliv.
In nil interesting article published
iu the Electrical World and Engineer,
Professor Francis B. Crocker tells of
the curious methods of the Chinese iu
sending telegraphic messages and of
the serious opposition of the natives
iu many parts of the Empire to the
modern convenience.
So opposed to innovations are the
natives in some districts that they
cut the wires and chopped down the
poles. As they have discovered,how
ever, that the poles can be used for
fuel aud the copper wire is valuable,
their active antagonism may not be
wholly due to fanaticism.
But tho most curious part of the
Chinaman's connection with telegraphy
is his method of sending messages. As
the Chinese language has no alpha
bet, but iu its written form is com
posed of an infinite number of sym
bols, each of which represent a word,
it can be seen that an extensive code
is necessary. This difficulty was en
compassed by means of numbers, as
Professor Crocker explains.
Shooting at a Halloou.
At Meudon, near Paris, a captive
balloon was recently allowed to rise
to a height of 150 metres and then
shot at with a Lebel rifle. Most of
the shots passed through tho lower
hall of the balloon, and some pierced
the upper halt The effect on the
balloon was hardly peroeptible, as
six hours elapsed before, in a very
gentle descent, it renohed the earth.
It is evident that the light gas did
not escape through the holes made in
the lower part of the balloon, and to
make holes effectively in the upper
half would require a gun of greater
calibre aud firing perhaps shrapnel.
It would not, however, be an easy
matter to hit with shot from a large
gun, a balloon traveling at a consider
able distance from the ground.—Lon
don Times.