FREELAND TRIBUNE.
rUBUfUD KVEUT
MOMDAY ASD THURSDAY.
rilOS. A. BUCKLEY,
EDITOR AUD PROPRIETOR.
OFFICII: Main Brnr above Centre.
sunscmFTiON rater.
One Year ~..J1 60
Six MdHtba— 96
Four Months 60
Two Months ...................... 26
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office. For Instance:
(irover Cleveland adjunct©
means that Orover is paid up to June 28,18QK.
Keep the figures In advance of tho present data.
Report promptly to this office when ycrar paves
la not received. All arrearages must bo paid
when paper Is discontinued, or collection wIH
he made In the maaner provided by law.
Tho New York Advertiser maintains
that the frying pan is responsible for
at least 5000 ailments that flesh is heir
to.
It costs $10,000,000 a year to gov
ern New York City. The total ex
penditures of the National Govern
ment in 1850 wero no larger.
Tho century is old ; only bix years
remain to it. But this is quito suffi
cient to work mighty changes iu tho
map of Asia, aud perhaps in that of
Europe, also.
Tho arrival of G, 718,000 hogs in
Chicago during tho past year would
teem to indicate to the Now York Ad
vertiser that that city is gettiug tho
(at of tho laud.
Since the year 1891 more than 11,000
claims, aggregating $10,000,000, have
been made for laud taken from tho In
dians. The sums paid sinco 1709 un
der the act passed that year for what
aro called depredation claims will
amount to moro than one hundred
billion dollnrs.
According to tho Bold Estate Becord,
office buildings which cost upward of
$1.50 a euhio foot ten years ago can
now bg erected for from thirty to forty
cents a cubic foot. This great sav
ing, duo to tho inoreasing uso of
(.team and mechanical devices, must
finally result iu a marked reduction of
cents.
Football playing is not only cs.
teemed an excellent advertisement for
a college, but somo preparatory
schools aro said by tho Now York Sun
to havo gono to the length of enticing
good players from rival schools by tho
offer of frco tuition. This means a
good deal, sinco tuition in a fashion
ablo preparatory school costs a nrotty
mm.
The gypsy moth which is taking
possession of New England is an im
migrant from France. It reached New
England in 1870, nnd has sinco multi
plied in an alarming way. Its cater
pillars are very destructive, and New
England would like to havo a Fodcral
appropriation of $2<00,000 to uso in
preventing it from interfering with in
terstate commerce.
Deputy Sheriff Hall, of North Caro
lina, stood in that Stato and killed
au escaping prisoner who was ucross
the lino in Teunessco. According to
a recent decision of the Supremo
Court of North Carolina ho seems
likely to escape punishment, as ho was
not in Tennessee when ho committed
tho crime, aud the crimowas not com
mitted in North Carolina.
A little less than 2000 miles of rail
road wore built iu tho United States
last year. That is almost tho low
water mark in railway building,
though tho years 1805, 1800 aud 1875
mado likowiso a meagre showing. For
ftvo yenif now the additional annual
mileage ftas shown a steady and rapid
decline. In 1890, 5070 miles were
built; in 1891, 4282, and in tho three
ensuing years, respectively, 4178,
2G33 aud 1919, bringing tho record
down to January 1, 1895. But uil
signs now indieato that the bottom has
has been reached, and that tho busi
ness will again resumo its normal vol
ume and activity. It is of great im
portance to tho prosperity of the coun
try ut largo that this form of industry
ho not impeded or prostrnted by ad
verse and ill-considered legislation, as
it sometimes has been, and it is to be
hoped that all artificial obstacles to
its resumption will ho speedily re
moved. There are in tho United
States 179,072 miles of conplot-cd
road, 54,800 of which has been laid ID
tho last ten years. Between this and
tho yenr 1900, with any luck ut all, we
ought to reach tho 300,000-milo lime,
and aro quite likely to do so. It looki
now as if steel rails would eoou be
turned out at sls per ton, a fact which
in itself will impart a powerful impulse
to railway building and all tho indus
tries allied with it
MY VALENTINE.
Thou art my soul's Bslovcd for ayo,
My heart's perpetual Vulontinoi
Tids little echo gives the sign,
Of lovo that novor shall decay.
So over rings this roundelay
Within my heart that sings to thine;
Thou art my sours Belovod for nye,
My hoart's perpetual Valentine.
My life grows stronger day by day,
Because thy lovo is mixod with mino ;
My soug grows sweeter, moro divine,
Bocausothy faith has shown tho way,
Thou art my soul's Beloved for ayo,
My hoart's perpetual Valentine.
—Lvmau Whitney Allen.
DOCTOR JACK'S VALENTINE.
EY LOUISE CHANDLER SIOULTON.
/ HEBE wcro half a
-AlrJ ft dozen of the girls
* "JO together pretty
vff 'Srayl creatures, in tho
very first season of
their long dresses—
\i:\ " 10 eldest not quite
■? sixteen. They wero
u " braids and puffs
—pL and fluffy curls—
( C all loops and ruffles
and ribbons all
ttnilos and dimples.
It was the Saturday beforo Valentine's
Day, in a certain year of grace, of
which I will not givo you tho pre
cise date, but less than ten years ago
and more than five. Of tho half-dozen
girls two aro busy teachers now, two
ure married, one is playing mother to
her brother's littlo brood of orphan
children, and tho sixth, not less happy
than the rest, has gono on to tho next
country, where they tell us sho will
novor grow old, never he sick or sorry
any more—happy Bertha, whom,
surely, God loved.
But that day in February nono of
them thought much about tho futuro
—the present was enough, with its fun
nnd frolic, its wealth and all tho
pleasures which girlhood holds dear.
Tho six wero passing tho long day to
gether. Two of thorn wcro sisters
and belonged in one house, and the
rest had come there to bo with them,
for they wero all going to make val
entines. They had made funny ones
and foolish ones—tender ones, with
just a little dash of satiro in them—
poetic ones and prosy ones—and at
last it was dinner time, a feast of all
tho things that schoolgirls love.
Boast turkey was there, and cran
berry jelly and sweet potatoes aud
6quasb, and then such pie 3 and pud
dings and nuts and raisins. How
could they hold it all? Ah, thoy wcro
hungry girls. At least they wore all
hungry girls but Nellie Hunt, and sho
6caicely ato any diuuer at nil, sho was
so busy thinking. Sho was Bertha's
sister, and this was her homo and
Bertha's, and it was to tho girl's own
room that tho littlo party went back
again after thoy had eaten and praised
Mrs. Hunt's dinner.
"What uro you thiuking about,
Null?" Bertha asked, sitting on tho
arm of Nelly's chair.
"These valentines," Nelly answered,
siowlv.
"Weil, surely thoy need not make
you sober—they are absurd enough."
"iTes, nnd it's just liccauso they aro
so absurd that they mako mo sober.
I was wondering why wo couldn't just
as well havo said something to help
somebody—so mako somebody think
to do somo good."
"Nolly's horoics!" cried Kate
Green, flippantly. "Miss Hunt as u
moral reformer 1"
Nellie blushed from her pretty cars
to tho roots of her snuuy hair ; but
her eyos shone eloar and thero was a
ring of earnestness iu her voieo as sho
unswered:
"You can laugh if you will, but I
mean what I say, and I'm going to try
an experiment. I will writo one hoy
a Valentino, tueli as I think a girl
ought to write, and send it."
"So you shall," Bertha said, gently
—Bertha always was a peacemaker;
"and we'll all go away and see mamma
and tho baby whilo yon writo it.
When it'sdouo you must call us."
"Yes, and you must show it to us,"
cried Kato Greou, as she went away ;
"that's only fair. Wo promised this
morning to show caeli other all wo
sent, and wo sha'n't let you off."
And then tho five fluttered away
like a flock ol birds, aud Nelly %vus
quite alone.
Her task was harder thau sho had
imagined. It is only the old, perhaps,
who are sago in counsel by naturo. At
any rate, to give good advice did not
como naturally to pretty Nelly. But
sho had au idoa of what sho wantod to
Bay, and at last she got it said.
Sho had written aud rewritton it,
nnd fiuallv concluded that sho eonld
do no better, and thou copied it into
her neatest handwriting before she
called the others. It was a little stiff,
to ho euro, aud preachy and high
flown, but it sounded like a lofty ef
fort aud a completo success to the lis
tening girls. This is what it6aid:
"MY VALESTISR—YOU will havo plonty
of lino spoocho-t anil praises, and, perhaps,
ol laa and fanoy, from others, so that I shall
not give you those—l, who havo but oa-> In
terest In you, namely, that you should bo tho
hi st hoy nnd tiio best man, which it Is possi
ble lor you to hocoiue. 11 you aro Bullish,
II you are laloluut, II you aro moan, you
will never be happy m your own sooloty un
til you hnvosuulc so low that you don't know
the difference betweengoodness uul baduoss.
But II you set out to bo a gentleman, nnd a
man of honor, and a faithful worker, you
will tic good dootls and live a happy lifo,
and bo worthy tho everlasting e-toom ol
"Youn YAI.KNTI \K."
Nelly read it wfth rising color and a
littlo quiver about her mouth, which
Bertha understood; but sho read it
with a firm voieo and a careful, delib
erate acocnt.
"Then," sho said, when sho had fin
ished. "I shall burn up all r-he rest of
my valentines, and send only this ono,
for it is what I mean, in earnest, and
as old Aunty Smoko says, 'Kf ft don't
do no good, it cuu't do no harm."
"To whom shall yon Bond it, dear?"
Bertha asked goutly, a little subdued
by Nelly's epistolary success.
"I hadn't made up my mind," Nelly
answorod, thoughtfully; "they all
neod it."
"Oh, send it to Jack," cried Ivitty
Green. "Ho boards with us, and he
neods it—bad enough. If ever a boy
was full of his pranks, Jack is, and if
ever a boy tormented a girl's life out,
Jack does mine.
A color clear and bright as flamo
glowed on Nelly Hunt's cheeks. Had
she had dark-eyed Jack in her mind
all tho while? She only answered,
very qulotlv:
"I don't mind. I would just as lief
send it to Juclc. That is, I'll send it
to him if you'll promise, on your sa
cred honor, never in any way to let
him know who wroto it."
"Oh, I will—trno as I live and
breutho I'll novcr tell him, and never
lot Mm guess, if I can help it."
"And all you girls?" Nelly asked,
with tho pretty pink glow deepen
ing in her cheeks. "Will you all
promise?"
And they all promised, for there
was a sort of honest earnestness in
Nelly's nature to which they found it
natural to yield.
So tho valoutino was directed in
Nelly's most neat and proper manner
to "Mr. Jack Green," and was dropped
into tho postoflieo with tho rest of
tho valentines tho girls had written
that day.
On tho fifteenth tho six girls wcro
all together at school, comparing
notes and exchanging confidences.
But Kitty Groou drew Nelly aside,
and said, while they walked up anil
down tho hail together, thoir arms
around each other as girls will.
"I saw Jack get it, Nelly."
Nolly's pretty cheoks glowed and
her eyes Bhonu like tho stars, but sho
asked no questions. Indood they wero
scarcely necessary, for Kitty was oagcr
enough to tell her story.
"Ho got it, don't you think, along
with half a dozen othors, and ho read
them all beforo ho came to this one. I
know this, you know, by the shapo of
tho envelope. When ho camo to it I
saw him read it all through, and then
I saw him go back and read it again.
I heard him say to himself:
" 'That's an honest letter from soino
little saint.'
"Then ho came up to me and held
it toward me, whilo I pretended to he
vory busy with my valentines. Then
he spoke:
" 'Do you know that handwriting,
Kit?'
"I felt like an awful little liar, but
I had promised you. I stretched out
my baud for it, and said, carelessly:
" 'Why, ain't it Suo's?"
"Sue is his sister, you know. So ho
thought I did not know who it came
frbm, and ho changed his mind and
put it into hi 3 pocket, and went off.
When I teased him afterward to let mo
see it, ho said:
" 'No; there aro somo things a fol
low would bo a cad to show.'
"So I saw it hit home, aud well it
might. It was a tremendous letter,
Nelly."
And Kitty ended with a hug and a
kiss, and a look of that loyal admira
tion which a girl can give another girl
now aud then.
When tho Bpring came Jack Green
went away from Cheater, aud did not
como back thoro any uioro. No doubt
Nelly lluut would havo forgotten hid
very exi.stcuco but for tho valeutinc,
which she could not forget. Sho lined
to blush, as sho grew older, to think
how "bumptious" it was, as sho used
to call it to horsclf. What was she,
that sho should have undertaken to
proach a sermon to that boy? • What
if he remembered it only to think
hoiv presuming it was, and to laugh
at it? But, luckily, ho did not know
from whom it came j and with that
thought she cooled her blushes.
Nolly was twenty when Jack Green
came buck to Chester again. And
now ho came as a physician, just
through Ilia studios, aud anxious to
build up a practice. Soon his fame
grow. Ifis pationta were among tho
poor at first, and he cured them ; and
thou richer people heard of it, ami
sent for him. But, while ho took all
patients that came, ho uevor gave up
his praotico among those who most
needod him. Ilia praise was in all
their mouths. There had never been
any doctor liko this one.
Nelly was Miss Hunt now—for
Bfrtha had gone away from lior into
tho next country—and Nolly's grief
had mnflo her goutlo heart yet moro
gontle, and her helpful spirit yet more
helpful.
Toward night, ono summer day, she
had gouo to seo uu old woman who
had boon her nurse once, and had
found her very ill—quito too ill to bo
left alono, and certainly in need of a
physician. So Nelly tore a leaf from
her memorandum-book, and wroto on
it a few lines, bogging Dr. Greon to
come at once, and then callod to tko
first passer-by and cntrcatod him to
tuko it to tho doctor.
It was scarcoly half an hour beforo
Dr. Greon came in quietly and gravoly.
Ho tended to his patient with that
careful consideration which made all
those poor souls whom he visited
adoro him. Then ho turned to Nolly.
"Who will stay with her to-nightV"
ho asked j "for indeed, sho, hardly
ought to bo left alono."
"I bhallstay," was tho quiet answer.
"Then come to tho door with mo,
ploaso, and let mo give you your di
rections. "
Nelly followed, and stood there, in
tho soft summer dusk—a pretty pio
turo—with tho wild roso flush dawn
ing in her cheeks, and a new light
kindling her bluo oyes. Sho listened
carclully to all his injunctions, and
then turned as if to go. But ho put
out a hand to detain hor.
"How very much I owe to you," he
said.
"You, how?" And a deop, doop
crimson dyod Nelly's luce uud throat.
In that moment eho thought of her
"bumptious" valentine, which had not
crossed her mind before for a long
time.
Ho looked at her with a smile in his
oyes, hut with a faco that preserved
all its respectful gravity. lie took a
red leathor case out of his pocket, and
from tho caso ho took tho very old
valentine, which Nollio romoinbcred
so well. Then ho produced tho brief
note sho had written that afternoon;
and still thero was light enough loft
in tho day to sco them by, us ho held
them sido by side.
"Your hand has maturod somewhat
sinco this valcutiuc was writton," he
remarked, quietly; "but somo of
these letters I should know unywherc.
No ono could deceive mo."
"I did lot supposo you had kept
that foolish thing," Nollio said, with a
pitiful littlo quiver in her voice, as if
sho wcro just ou tho point of bursting
into tears. "I am so ashamed."
Hr. Jack looked at her a moment,
as sho stood thcro in tho wauinglight,
a lovely, graceful girl, from whom any
man might bo proud to win cyen a
passing interest. So this was tho wo
man, tho thought of whom ho hau car
ried iu his heart for years! If ho had
over done any good thing, ho was paid
for it in the satisfaction of that hour.
"Are you sorry," ho asked, Blowly,
"that you havo helped ono man to bo
his best solf? Thoso words of yours
wcro to mo lilto tho voice of my inmost
soul. Siuco then this paper has never
loft me, nor havo I ever erased to
strive to bo worthy of the esteem of
my uuknewn 'vuloutine.' If over I
boeu gonerous instead of selfish, brave
instead of cowardly, strong instead of
weak, it has been because I havo re
membered tho words writton here, and
meant to livo iu their Bpirit. Aro you
sorry for that? or do you grudge mo
tho dear ploasuro of thanking you?"
"No, I'm not sorry, nor dolgrudgo
you anything; but it was a girl's
freak, aud I urn not worthy of so much
praiso and honor."
"It was a good girl's intention," ho
said, almost solemnly. "Lot us bo
thankful that it succeeded."
Nelly went back to the bedside of
tho old woman with a fluttering heart.
How strango it scorned to think this
sick woman was old enough to havo
outlived all anxieties oxccpt thoso
about her pains aud her supper. Had
not sho been young once? and had no
ono ever looked at her as Dr. Jack
lookod?
Tlio next morning ho camo again.
His medicine, a night's slcop, Nelly's
caro- something seemod to havo given
tho poor old patient a fresh lcaso of
lifo. There was no need that Nelly
should stay with her any more; but
she went to see her daily, and it was
curious how often Dr. Jack's visits
happened at tho same time.
Ouo night tho doctor had left his
horso at home, and ho and Nelly
walked away togotkcr. They walked
about tho lingering sunset, aud tho
soft south wind, aud ovon tho old
women; for Nelly, woman-like, was
struggling desporately to keep Dr.
Jack from saying what sho dosperately
wanted to hear. But at last it came—
a half-blunt, half-awakened speech,
yet with Dr. Jack's honest heart iu
it.
"I'vo lived all thoso years just to
earn your esteem, and now I And I
don't euro a thing about that unless I
can wiu also your love."
I think Nelly's auswor must havo
satisfied him, for sho is Mrs. Jack
Green now; and that valentine
worn aud old, but choicely framed
-always hangs over tho doctor's study
table.
A Loa! Baric J Twenty-Arc Years.
Twonty-fivo years ago Timothy
Mouahan, of Batk, Steubou Uounty,
purchased a farm near Portago Bridge.
Ho has lived on tho farm ever since.
Ou part of tho property was a pioco of
heavy timber, which Monahau cleared
off twenty years ago. In a fiold where
this timber stood Monobau was dig
ging a ditch a few days ago. To do
this ho had to dig through a doposli
of gravel four foot doop. At tliat
depth ho uncovered what ho at first
thought was a big stono nearly rouud,
but ou striking it with his pick to
looscu it ho was surprised to soo tho
pick poss cluar through it without
making any resistauoo. Monahau
thou picked up the supposed stouo
aud his nmazomout was groat to find
it to ho a loaf of bread. Tho loaf was
iu perfect couditiou, even to tho crisp,
brown crust. It was as soft, light
and moist iusido as if it had just corno
from tho oven. Tho loaf broke iu two
as ho was removing it from its bod in
tho gravel. Ho fod Jialf of it to his
dog, who ato it greedily. Tho other
half of tho loaf Monahan carried to
his house, whero it is now, a wonder
to tho neighborhood. Monahan de
clares that tho ground whoro tho loaf
was found had never boon broken dur
ing his quarter of a century on tho
place.—Buffalo (N. Y.) Times.
A Wonderful Mirage.
At Port Huron, Mich., early risers
tho other morning wcro treated to a
wonderful mirage, which showed in
tho clouds even to tho most minute
detail a strip of tho Cauadian bunk of
tho St. Olair River thirteen miles long.
Tho city of Saruia was so plainly do
pietcd that even the principal resi
dences wcro rccognizablo. Thoro, too,
was tho imago of ferryboats plying ou
tho river, tho novel sight of big chim
neys pouring out smoko and appar
ently located far nbovo tho earth. Tho
most wonderful part of tho spectacle
was tho arrival of n train in Sarnia.
This train appeared to break into
tho mirago from tho east, plowed its
way through as if running on the most
solid foundation, and then oomplotely
disappeared at tho westeru end of the
sky picture. The mirago lasted forty
fivo minutes, and was soon by thous
ands of people io tho streets.—Chi
cago Herald.
THE MERRY" SIDE OF LIFE,
STORIES THAT ARE TOED BY THE
FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS.
A Great. Great. Question—A Disap
pointment—A Hopeless Suit—ln
101)3 At a Guess, Etc., TCtc.
It's when tho baby yells nt night, anil tho
lira has Rono out.
An<l zero zephyrs toss your (ragilo garments
all aboat,
When stepping on tho oilcloth dank you
loudly catoh your broatlv
And ere you gain tho kitchen you nro'frozen
near to death,
Whllo thcro you find tho atmosphere hnstßOt
into tho pipes
And burstod them wide open, making bills
as long as snipes',
Aud baby keeps yolllog. In defiaaeo ol tho
wenther.
With lungs of great capacity built out of
bellows leather.
That you ponder on tho your
brain whirls round ker-whiz,
If marriage is a failure—and you rnthor
think It Is.
—W. 0. Fuller, iu Rockland (Mo.) Tribune.
A DISAPPOINTMENT.
Fanny—"What becaino of Harry
after you refused him?"
Clara—"Ho married miserably
well."—Puck.
AT A OIJESS.
Madgo—"Ho you know why they
cull thoso old caricatures raro prints?"
Cholly—"l—er—suppose it's be
cause they are not well done."—Life. '
A HOPELESS "SUIT.
ne—"But you euy yourself your
step-father is anxious to get you off
his hands."
Sho—"That's why I am afraid ho
won't listen to you."—Lifo.
IN 1U95.
Miss nystrnug—"l can't bear that
young Mr. Smitliers."
Tho New Girl—"Why not?"
Miss Hystrung—"Why, ho's pos
itively maseulino in his ways."—Chi
cago Record.
HER SYSTEM OF CHRONOLOGY.
Minnie "How ridiculous! Mrs.
Ferris says sho never really began to
live until sho met her husband."
Asia—"Humph! I suppose that's
how she makes out she's only twenty
two."—Puck.
SATISFIED.
Father—"You must know, sir, that
my daughter will got nothing from
me until my death."
Suitor (pleasnutly)—"Oh, thnt's all
right, sir; that's all right. I havo
enough to livo on for two or thrco
years."—Puck.
AS HE SAW niMSF.LF.
"Gracious," said tho artist to tho
sculptor, "you'vo made that bust of
Swelby outrageously large."
"Yes," was tho reply ; "I had to do
it. He told mo to malto it life-size,
aud I couldn't risk iusultiug him."—
Washington Star.
AN EXACT ANSWER.
"What havo you to say to this bill,
any way?" said tho collector, some
what warmly, as Biuilcy smiled from
tho open door.
"Nothing," returned Bimlcy, sen
tentiously. Aud that was what it
turned out to be.—ltockland (Mo.)
Tribune.
OVERTIME CHARGES.
Gent—"What is tho reason you
chargo twico as much for my cuffs us
you did formerly?"
Washerwoman —"Bccauso you have
begun making pencil notes on thorn."
Gent—"What differouoo docs that
make?"
Washerwoman—"Tho girls wa3to so
much timo in trying to make them
out?"—Amsterdammer.
A SYMPATHETIC , FUELING.
Mr. Jurydodger—"Your Honor, I
feel that I urn not lit to bo a jury
man."
Judgo—"You appear to mo to bo
unusually intelligent, sir."
Mr. Jurydodger—"But, your Hon
or, I can't make head or tale out of
what thoso lawyers say."
Judgo—"Neither can I; takoyour
scat in tho jury-box.
WOES OF THE NODTLITY.
Mrs. King—"Yes, my daughter Tcs
sio married a blacksmith, aud sho has
a nieo homo aud is getting nloug nice
ly. Jnliu married a shoomakor and is
very comfortably provided for. Alico
married a butcher and is happily sit
uated.
Mrs. Frazicr—"And your daughter
Nicolette?"
Mrs. King (sadly)—" Alas I Sho mar
ried u foreign prince. I send her flvo
dollars a week, aud by taking in
washing sho mauagos to support the
family."—Truth.
TOE TEST IN BOSTON.
"I adore you," said he.
"How much do you ndoro me?"
asked Miss Bokoustreot, calmly.
"Enough to join our Browning So
oioty this winter?"
110 struggled within himsolf and ho
whisperod, "Even that!"
Miss Bokonstreet smiled tenderly
upon him and murmured: "Ono
thing moro; will you take mo to the
symphony to-morrow iu my new
bloomers?"
But ho hod flod, and thoy wore no
longer platouio friends Lifo.
A MOnE EOGSIIELLENT WAY.
"Sorry, I'm sure," smilingly chirped
Mr. Bimloy, as tho man put tho bill
grumblingly book into bis pocket.
"But it you will call around In an
other month I think I can arrango it."
"I wish you wcro a chicken,"
growled tho man with tho hill-book
us ho liackod down tho stops.
| "Inasmuch as to wlioreforo?" asked
Mr. Bimley, as a momentary gleam of
interest passed athwart his vision.
" 'Cos then you would shell out in
three weeks," retorted tho man as ho
wearily put ono foot before tho other
and so vanished from sight.—Rock
land (Mo.) Tribune.
AT TIIE INTETiOIGENCE OFFICE.
Mrs. Do Poystor (engaging a sor
vant) —"What nationality aro you,
Norah?"
Norah—"Sure, Oi'm an American,
mum."
Mrs. Do P.—"What kind of Amori
cun?"
Norah- "Faith and Oi guess you'd
call mo an Oirish-Americau."
Mrs. Do P.—"Then you will not
suit mo, ns I want a pure American."
Norah—"Oi didn't know there was
any, mum."
Mrs. Do P. (haughtily)—"l am
one."
Norah—"Oh, it's beggin' your par
don Oi am 1 but Oi never would have
thought it; yez don't look a bit like
an Indian, mum."—Puck.
IVhat a Man Can 110.
Men regard with admiring wonder
tho career of a Napoloon, a Bismarck,
a Gladstone, an Agassiz or an Edison,
but thoy do not sooin to realize what
can bo dono by concentrated and
persistent human will power and
energy.
A rocontly published biography of
Daniel Defoe is tho story of tho life of
n man who mndo his mark as a mor
chaut, manufacturer, traveler, politi
cian, polemic, journalist, poet, satirist
and novelist.
This restlessly activo and enorgotie
mortal left moro than two huudrcd
and fifty printed works, and two of
them, by common consent, are master
pieces of literature that will last as
long as tho English languago is
spoken.
His was a checked career—now, tho
favorite of ono ministry; disgraced
and punished by another liko a com
mon criminul; tho master ono day of
a princely mansion, and hiding from
his creditors tho next.
According to his own statement,
Defoe was in his lifetimo "thirteou
times rioh and poor," a record not ap
proachod by any great speculator of
our day. Sometimes wo hear of a man
who has made threo fortunes, but wo
raroly ever hear of a man who has
gono beyond that limit, und certainly
no mnu of this generation has been
thirteou times rich and poor, fortu
nate and unfortunate in politics, and
tho author of 250 books, besides show
ing ability as a manufacturer, mer
chant, traveler, polemic, journalist,
poet, satirist and novelist.
Talk about versatility—Dofoo beats
them all I The mero outline of suoh a
career should encourage and stimulate
thoso who complain that they aro ham
pered by circumstances. If Defoe
could do what he did, cannot the
avcrago man of pluck, energy and de
termination accomplish at least one
fourth as much.—Atlanta Constitu
tion.
The Value or Mamps.
Tho great increaso in tho prices of
tho stamps of this country, as will be
shown by the now stamp catalogue,
has created a heavy demand for them,
collectors being anxious to got what
stamps thoy lack before the new prices
go into effect. Whilo somo specimens
remain at tho old prices, others have
doublod, tho averago incroaso ou the
adhesives being about twenty-five pel
cent.
It was expected that nino now
stamps would bo issuod iu China on
tho sixtieth anniversary of tho Em
press-Dowager's birthday. It is un
derstood that tho stamps will tako the
pluco of tho previous issue and bo of
two sizes.
Fivo now stamps havo been issued
for uso between Fez and Sepro, iu
Morocco, tho values being fivo, t-(
twenty-live and fifty centimes and <—\c
franc.
Mexico has issuod four now varieties
of envelopes, tho four aud ten con
tavocs on white laid paper and five
und ten on whito wovou paper.
Until recently many collectors in
this country wero iu tho habit of buy
ing United Btatos stumps from Eug
laud, where they could bo purchasod
at much lowor pricos than here. Af
fairs havo changed now, and fine
specimens of tho old issues of this
country, and ospecinlly tho raro de
partment stamps, such as Executive,
Justico, Btuto and Navy, will now
bring higlior prices in London than
can bo obtaiucd iu Now York.
A new sot of adhesive stamps is con
templated for tho Bahamas.
Stamp-collecting has grown so muoh
in fuvor lately that it is now a regular
thing for many of tho largo daily
papors to givo weekly installments of
stamp matter.—Chicago Times.
Advlco About Saws.
A sawmakor has this ndvico to give
to carpenters in tho selection of a saw :
"See that it 'hangs' right. Grasp if
by tho haudlo and hold it in position
for workiug to soo if tho handlo fits
tho hand properly. A handlo should
be symmetrical and tho linos perfect.
Many handles aro mado of grcon
wood; thoy soon shrink and become
loose, tho scrows standing abovo the
wood. An unsoasonod handlo is liable
to warp and throw tho saw out of
shape. Try tho blado by springing it,
seeing that it bonds evonly from point
to butt in proportion as tho width and
gango of tho saw vary. Tho blade
should not bo too heavy in compari
son to tho tcoth, as it will require
moro labor to uso it. Tho thinner you
oon got a Btiff saw the better; it makos
less 'kerf' and tnkes le3B nrasclo to
drivo it. Seo that tho saw is well set
and has a good crowning breast. Placo
it at a distauco from you, get a proper
light on it and you enn soo if there
has boon any imperfeotion in grinding
or hammering."—Chicago Record.
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.
Garbage is cremated in fifty-fivo
English towns.
Chicago's death rate for tho year
1804 was only 15.1 per 1000.
Boap bubbles are rohud because every
part of their surfaeo is equally pressed
by tho atmosphere.
A colony of medusao has been com
pared to a collection of muslin sun
o'onnots floating right sldo up in tho
water.
Over one-half of tho sand of every
ihore is composed of minnto shells,
Bach of which was onoo tho homo of o
living creature. *.
Timbers have been removed from
Imtnenso swamps, whore horses could
aot penetrate, by building an elcvatod
Irolley through the tree tops.
Tho Pasteur Institute will horcoftei
sbiyrin its serum for the treutmont of
liphthoria from horses condemned as
no longer fit for tho French cavalry
tervioe.
Tho action of coffee on tho body is
mainly duo to a certain acid and oily
properties contained in tbo berries,
nd greatly developed in tho roasting
process.
Tho Japanese University has the
most delicate series of instruments in
tho world for moasuriug earthquako
•hocks—and plenty of mnteriul to use
them on.
Tho giant of all tho telescopes of
tho world, the great Yerkes instru
ment for tho University of Chicago,
will soon bo scanning the heavens with
its immense cyclopoau oyo.
Tho scintillation of stars, according
to a now theory suggested by H. E.
Christian, is largolv duo to tbo con
stant passage between tho oarth und
tho stars of small motcorio bodios,
which are now bolievod to bo drifting
in spaoo in tho immonso numbers
necessary to produce this effect.
"Cancer is contagious," doolared
Dr. Guelliot, of Bheims, to tho con
gross of Fronch surgeons held reoontly
at Lyons, France. "Tho transmission
may be direct from tho body, but it is
effootod more frequently through wear
ing apparel or tablo utensils; in two
cases it was through a tobacco pipo."
Tho ling has been found in tho Col
umbia River, which Professor Eigon
manu finds to present no specific dif
ferences from thoso of Lako Michigan.
The fish is found in all three of tho i
great water basins of tho Atlantic Slope
—tho Saskatchewan, St. Lawrence and
Mississippi—and its distribution is
now extended to the Pacific Slope.
It is estimated by Professor Dolbcar
that a lump of coal weighing a pound
has in it energy enough to lift its
weight 1000 miles high. Uo says that
this energy is inherent in matter—that
every partlclo of matter is constantly
exerting its force on ovory other par
ticlo, and that if not prevontcd they
will oomo together no matter how far
apart they may be.
Some curious balls of hair, rolled
up by tbo action of tho waves, hnvo
been colleoted by M. Forel on tho
beach of tho Gulf of Morges, near
some great tanneries. In soino places
they wore numerous enough to form a
continuous stratum under tho ground,
and it is suggested that iu time they
might form very puzzling fossils for
future geologists.
—— *
Signs of a Wet Year.
P. Y. Baker, of Traver, made a trip
to Fanocbo grade last week, and ou his
return told of somo weather signs
pointed out to him by an old Mexican
of that suction. The Moxicau bhowed
him a number of tarantula nests that
were built iu au nnusual manner.
Tho tarantula, digs or appropriates
a hole six or eight iuchos deep and
aoarly an inoh in diameter, lie then
makes a cement wall from bottom to
top of tho hole and about a sixteenth
of au inch thick. Ou tho top ho fits a
(id so nicely that when it is closed tho
nest is impervious to tho elements.
His spidorHhip raises and lowers tho
roof of his mansion by means of a fiber
binge, which ho has deftly placed on
one side.
Tho walls aro always built up an i
inch above tho grouud, lyt tho peou- T
liurity about them this year is that they
are built up four or live iuchos above
tho surface of tho ground on which
thoy aro looatod.
This is one of tho many instances
that havo boon observed iu whioh ani
mals havo been prompted by instinct
to protect themselves agniust inclo
ment wcathor, and it is regarded ns au
unfailiug sign of a very wet season.—
Belma (Gal.) Irrigator.
A Famous Town Fair.
Lnnoastcr, Ponu., is ono of tho
few American towns with tho traditiou
of an auunal local fair. It is a long
time sinco the fair was hold, but it
flourished onoo so that it was tho event
of tho year. Tho priuoipal street of
tho little city was almost hidden iu
booths and tables, and every sort of
merchandise was sold, from ginger
bread to rioh silks. Country lads
saved their pennies tho wholo yoar to
havo money for tho fair, and on fat* f
day every 10l bought somothing
pretty for his loss. Lancaster was
then in many essentials a German
village.—New York Suu.
A Slrcot-Car Piillod by a Thread.
A street-car fittod with ball-bearings
was drawn a distauco of several hun
dred foot by men pulling on threo
strands of ordinary sewing throad in a
rocent experiment iu Canada. A car
riage manufacturer put another stylo
of ball-bearings on tho axles of a
coach ordinarily pullod by four
horses. A trained dog was hitched to
the pole and he drow tho coach around
the yard with little effort. Tho com
bination of pneumutlo tiros and ball
bearings would relieve maoh of the
strain now put on horses. —American
Agriculturist.