ENVIRONMENT. This earth, where HO mysteriously we camo Girds ns with kinship; i robust oaks dwell Our fortitudes; the willows and ferns too well Our foolitdi frailty or pliancy proclaim; The dawns nre our pure deeds; the erratic ! flame Of lightning: Hares our passions; the grave spell Of moonlight speaks our sorrow—and scarce we tell Our pictured lives from their terrestrial frame. Wherefore the closelier that we lean to look, On thoso material and yet airy ties Which bind us to this orb through fated years, W'e almost feel as if great Nature took Our joys to weave her sunshine with, our sighs To make her winds, and for her rains our tears. —[Edgar Fuwcett, in tie Cosmopolitan. THAT PRLIIT LITTLE SIMPLETON. BY VIRUIB F. HARRIS. What a silly littlo thing she was, hut J how pretty! All smiles and dimples, j rosy checks and fluffy brown hair, shad ing laughing blue eyes! 1 thought, as 1 sat opposite her that day in the street ear, and heard her girlish prattle, that I had never seen such a combination of j silliness and prcttincss. Her silly chat ter provoked me desperately, for I was intensely interested in an article in the > last Medical Journal, which had direct \ bearing on a complicated case I was going that morning to treat. An aeei- j dent that morning to one of my horses and a stupid blunder of my coachman I had forced mo to take the car, and I felt us cross as a bear, and looked so,I know, for when 1 caught her eye she tossed her silly little head and turned away with a pout. 1 heard enough about papa,balls, | the opera, etc., to guess ihat she was au idolized, only child and something of a belle. As I was too old to ignore the , vacuum in her head, for the sake of the pretty face, I was much relieved when i Dora Copperfield—as I mentally styled '■ her—ami her friend left the ear. It was strange, but after the first chance meet ing, 1 was constantly meeting Dora. 1 caught glimpses of her nestling down in the cushions, as her carriage dashed with a Hash and a glitter by my office. At the ! opera the fates threw ine in her neigh borhood. She was with a fat, pompous looking middle-aged man, whom I took to bo "papa." I mentally dubbed him "old money-bags," and hated liiin as heartily as I did his daughter—ho looked so com- i plaecnt and listened with such evident I relish to her ceaseless, silly prattle. | One day I was summoned in great | haste to the bedside of a patient whom 1 had attended a few times before. She | and her daughter lived in a quarter of the city to which my practice seldom 1 called me, and among people 1 only I served for sweet charity's sake. Though these two were as poor us many I at- 1 tended free 1 could not dare refuse the foe they promptly tendered after each visit. Of them 1 knew nothing further than that they wcro Indies. There was a proud independence, a dignified reticence that commanded my respect. I was much attracted by them both; the mother was refined und gentle, and bore with forti tude her sufferings; tho daughter was beautiful, proud, dignified, and bravely independent. I was anxious to help them, but the opportunity for doing so delicately and without risk of offending had never yet presented itself, and not for my right hand would I have offended their brave, proud, reticent? poverty. But on this visit the evidences of poverty were even greater. The room was very bare; evidently they had been forced to j Sawn many necessary articles. The aughter was pale and thin, aud some thing like despair shone in the beautiful dark eyes. 1 found Mrs. Trevor vory weak and low. After I had prescribed for her I sat like "Micawber," hoping "something would turn up"—that there would be some opening in tho conversa tion where 1 might safely offer.aid. I could not leave them in such destitution. 1 must help them—this wus not their place and sphere, and they must be lifted out by some means. The mother was too weak to talk, and Miss Trovor was too absorbed in her own sad thoughts for conversation, so I must tuko the dilemma by the horns. "Have you been taking wine as I pre scribed, Mrs. Trevor? You are much weaker than when I saw you last, and 1 had hoped the wine would have built up your strength." Miss Trevor seemed to struggle with herself. A burning blush suffused her face and nock. At last she raised her head proudly, and with a defiant air looked mo full and steadily in the eye, as sho said in a low voice, without a quiver: 44 N0, Dr. Ileathcotc. We were not able to follow your prescription fully. 1 The wine you sent mother was of great 1 benefit to her, and I was ablo to supply it, also, until last week, when she was j taken much worse, requiring my unre mitting attention, which forced mo to stop sewing, my only means of support. | But I had just finished some work for a young lady, and us she owed me S2O, I j trusted to that to tide me over, until I i could resume work. But I have been | unable to collect the money, and we arc penniless." Bravely said, mv beautiful Spartan! I thought, as 1 looked at the fine, pale face with its troubled eyes. The Spar tan youth, with the wolf gnawing at his vitals, suffered less than you did in making this confession. Behind that marble calmness, my beautiful Galatea, what a Vesuvius must be throbbing and seething in your heart and brain! In juries and injustice that you can't for get—neglect and coldness from those who should have befriended! 44 Ye8, doctor," said Mrs. Trevor, 44 Helen kept her troubles from mo as long as she could, and has allowed me to want for nothing, but failing to collect the money due her has been a great hardship. The poor child has not tasted food since yesterday." She covered her face with her hands, and the tears trickled down through the thin fingers. i turned like one shot and stared at that beautiful girl, standing so quiet and coin posed. Starving! starving! She, fit to be a queen, and suffering for bread! I stalked like a caged lion up and down the narrow room. 44 Oh, the heartless rich! The cold, heartless rich!" 44 More thoughtless than heartless, I think, Dr. Ileathcotc." I stopped short as the cool, even tones fell on my ear, and marching up to her took both her hands in mine. 1 was old enough to be her father. 44 Helen, why didn't you come to me? Why didn't you come?" The tears came to her eye? —Hie first I had seen there. "Wo are such strangers to you. I would not have presumed " "Strangers bo hanged! Excuse me, Helen. Hut, my child, you arc too proud! There comes u time in the life of most, when we must accept help— when pride must be laid aside and we must stoop! Independence is a very tine thing, my dear, but the proudly inde pendent man is not the huppy man. lie who can find pleasure in receiving as well as giving is the one who gets most good out of life, because closer drawn to his fellow man. Now, my dear, I'm going to get wine for your mother and nourishing food for you." She put out her hand protestingly, and again that blush of humbled pride mounted to her face. "Your mother's life depends upon timely aid. You and I can have our j reckoning by and by. 1 will look in again this afternoon." Soon 1 had sent up wine, fruits and . well prepared food to Helen and her mother. I could not dismiss them from 1 my mind for a moment during my round j of visits. I could understand the ugony , of humiliation that poor girl wus suffer- j ing—as well as the fear and sorrow hang- j ing over her from her mother's illness, j Poverty had not been long with them; it was apparent that their bettor days had | been recent. Then us I thought how : that rich girl's thoughtless, heartless in ! difference and neglect to pay her had 1 aggravated Helen's shame and grief, my : indignation knew no bounds, and when 1 reached Mrs. Trevor's humble room that afternoon I bad worked myself into a furor of anger against that unknown transgressor, Helen's lato employer. 1 was boiling over with rage, which in creased, if possible, when 1 found Mrs. j Trevor worse and noted Helen's troubled, ' anxious face. After doing all I could j for my patient, who soon fell into a doze, ' 1 called Helen out into the hall. | " Helen, give ine the name and address of the person who owes you." | She looked at me inquiringly as I took out my notebook and pencil, but said: j " Miss Floy Garrison,2olo L avenue." I I wrote it down hurriedly and without another word was on my way to find this 1 girl. I had but one thought—to bring her to see the sorrows she had caused. It might teach her a lesson and cause her to feel a little of the sliuine and mortifi cation Helen had to endure. When 1 drew up before2olo L avenue a carriage stood before tlie door and a party of four stood ready to enter. A slender, middle-aged lady, a fine-looking ' young man, " old money bags " and Dora i (Jopperfield! Ribbons flying, curls blow ing, draperies fluttering and merry laughter. So Miss Empty Head was the culprit. I was not surprised at all. If 1 had been a knight of the middle ages 1 would have I snatched her in my arms and rushed ! away with her, and after showing her the j trouble and sorrow she had caused, im ' mured her in a dungeon deep and dark, • but as it wus the practical nineteenth ! century I must observe the convention alities. So, whilo thirsting for ven i geance, 1 bud to smirk and bow and in troduce myself. Yes, "old moneybags" knew Dr. Heuthcote quite well by reputation. Glad to meet him. "This," pointing to the middle-aged lady," was his wife; the young lady was his daughter Floy, and this his nephew, Mr. Philip Everett, from the south." I then politely requested Miss Garrison to accompany 1110 to see a patient who was very low, who knew her, und in whom she would bo interested. Floy looked inquiringly ut pupa, who suid: " Yes, go." Not a word was spoken during the drive, but when wo stood in Helen's room I pointed to Mrs. Trevor's wustcd form and suid: II Behold your work." " Oh, what do you mean?" Tho blue eyes wero round and fright ened and the roses had faded from the pretty cheeks. 1 turned sternly upon her and suid: 44 1 mean that a girl as young and beautiful as yourself, as well-born and as well-bred, has been reduced to a dread ful poverty —a poverty such as you have never seen, but have cried over in novels; she has been struggling bravely to keep back want and trouble from an invalid mother, while you were going to parties and halls; but out of your plenty you couldn't spare the pitiful S:?U she had earned by hard work, it would have been a small fortune to her and saved her heartaches and humiliation terrible to her proud nature!" 44 Forgive me, oh, forgive me, Miss Trevor, for my cruel, thoughtless care lessness! " Sho was crying and clinging to Helen who stood away. 44 1 have been so wickedly thoughtless! I did not know there was so much suffer ing and want in the world! Can you over forgive me? " | But before Helen could speak, there i was a loud knock at the door, and when | I opened it, Col. Garrison and Mr. Philip j Everett stood before me. Col. Garrison explained that after I had left them with I Floy, ho grew uneasy, thinking he had I been too precipitate in giving his con sent for her to accompany me, fearing ! iny patient might be suffering from some contagious disease. Hero Floy threw wide open the door, and coming info the hall, threw herself into her father's arms and sobbed out the whole sad story. But what was the matter with Helen? Was she about to faint? She steadied herself with one hand against a chair, while the other was pressed to her heart; her face was deadly pale, and her wide stretched eyes were riveted upon Mr. Everett, who when lie caught sight of her through the open door, stepped forward with a glad cry of 44 Helen!" His manly, handsome luce was radiant with happi ness, and 1 heard him say: 44 Found at lust! I have searched ev erywhere for you, Helen!" 44 Can you still " 44 D0 1 still love you? Oh, Helen, how can you ask!" And unmindful of us all she fell into bis arms and wept out her sorrows and griefs upon his heart. I closed the door, and Col. Garrison, Floy and I discreetly withdrew farther into the hull. After a few moments Mr. Everett and Helen came out. At lust my beautiful ; Galatea was endowed with life. A look of happiness such as 1 had never seen there before shone in the dark eyes. Then Mr. Everett, in a manly, struigh forward way, told their story. He and Miss Trevor had boon children together in a far distant Southern city, and he came engaged soon after both had left school, but after tho death of Helen's father, nearly a year before, an unfor tunate misunderstanding arose, which separated them, and Helen and her mother quietly left the city, leaving no truce behind them, and all these months iho had been searching for them. Then ! that pretty little simpleton, Floy, proved ' her head was not quite empty by saying: 44 Papa, Mrs. Trevor and Helen must 1 go home with us, where we may rcpuir, ; if possible, the wrong I did them." i And it was done just as Miss Kattle brain proposed, and she proved herself the most faithful, untiring and devoted 'of nurses—the most unselfish and loving of friends and cousins; and before the wedding day came around, she and Helen were as devoted as sisters, and when that day did come old Money-bags wus the most generous of uncles. And when Helen kissed me good-bye that day, she said with happy teurs in her pretty dark "Dr. lleathcote, I will never cease to love and bless you! The brightest day of my life, except this, is that on which you rushed Floy in upon her avenging Nemesis!" Before Philip left with his wife he told ; me, at Helen's request, what he told no I one else—tho story of their poverty and separation. Helen's father had boon Philip's guardian, and after his death it j was found that ho had appropriated and ! squandered the whole of Philip's fine for tune. Philip tried to keep this from Helen, but in some way she learned it, and her grief, mortification and despair were terrible to see. She thought that Philip would scorn to marry the daughter of a dishonest man. So after she and her mother had settled all of that small fortune upon Philip— for both felt keenly the disgrace, and wished to make what reparation they could—they quietly left tho city, giving Philip no hint of their destination. "1 knew she was a heroine?" I said, as I slapped Philip on the back. Mrs. Trevor remained with tho Gar risons until Philip and Helen returned from their brief trip, then she went with them to the cosy little home that Col. Garrison gave Philip on his wedding day. My gift to my beautiful girl was a com plete silver service and a horse and phaeton; so I see the bright, happy face every day or so as she drives by und nods and smiles at me. Well, it is always the unexpected that happens. When that boy of mine, Walter lleathcote, came homo from college, ready for a partnership with his old father, what should ho eto but fall in love with that pretty little simpleton, Floy Garrison, and make her Mrs. lleath cote before I could say Jack Robinson!— [Detroit Free Press. An Agent for Pneumonia. The fun answers many purposes other than for the cooling of its wicldcr, but few appreciate the fact that it can bo made an effective agent for pneumonia. "Talk about the early martyrs," said a lady in the hearing of a Boston Herald , man, as she came out of a crowded con cert room the other evening. "They are absolutely nothing to me. Hero 1 am, just up from un attack of influenza, and I'll warrant myself to have another at tack, and all tor the selfish stupidity of one old woman with a fan. I wish peo ple had more consideration, or sense, or something," and the speaker stopped to sneeze and pull her wraps closer about her throat. "And she sat there by your side, and waved one of those strong, gusty funs, creating a breeze like a young whirlwind, until you are all of a chill, I suppose," said her friend. "In deed, yes, and the more I pulled up my scarf the harder she fanned. There wasn't a vacant seat in the house, or I i would have taken it. 1 didn't like to ask her to stop, for she hadn't a specially inviting countenance. And I have taken a severe cold, for every bone in my body aches. I think there should be a rule against fans in crowds, just us there is against canes and umbrellas in art gal leries. You can mend statues or build more, but there isn't a remedy that I know of when wo once are dead from somebody's carelessness or indifference." What Chaff is For. Tho chaff which surrounds all kinds of grain bus very important economic uses. In its wild state this chaff saves the seed from exposure to weather, sometimes in severe seasons only one or two grains escaping damage by winter's exposure. When first cultivated most kinds of grain lmd doubtless much more abundant chaff than now. The original wild Indian corn, in which each grain has a husk of its own, is an illustration of this. But chuff' even now serves a very important purpose. It allows tho grain to dry out in stacks and mows, without hcuting so as to injure the seed. Grain threshed before this drying out is accomplished heats much more injuriously in the granary. Sometimes in threshing outs that have been drawn in wet, we have seen the straw blackened by heating around the bands, while the heaps kept separate by the chaff' showed each grain bright and uninjured. Wheat that has a strong bearded cluiff is usually a strong grower, as its generating power is less apt to ho destroyed by heating in the mow. This fact secures tho continued popularity of these sorts, despite the unpleasantness of working among bearded grain, ltcnpiug machines that bind grain with twine |as soon as cut, make tho chuff even ! more necessary. It is not any more difficult to work among, and it does help j to keep grain from being injured through j imperfect drying before mowing awuy.— [American Cultivator. The Horse-Power of Whales. Sir William Turner, the present emi nent professor '>f anatomy in tho Uni versity of Edinhurg, Scotland, has given much attention to the study of whales, their structure, habits, etc. 110 es ! timutes that the great Greenland whale (average length 60 feet) attains a maxi mum speed while swimming of ten miles an hour; the 44 Finer" whale (maximum length 85 feet) often making twelve to fourteen miles an hour. Mr. Turner, in ono of his lectures, said that he and .John Henderson, of Glasgow, tho well known builder of the Anchor Line steam ships, hud spent much time in trying to arrive at a satisfactory conclusion as to the horse-power exerted by large species of the whale in making a speed of twelve miles an hour. As a base for their conclusions they took the size and dimensions of the great "Finncr," which was stranded on the shore at Longuiddry some years ago. it was 80 feet long, weighed 74 tons and had a tail which was 20 feet across at the extreme end of its flanges. With these data, Messrs. Turner and Henderson calculated that a whale of the dimensions mentioned, in order to attain a speed of twelve miles an hour, must exercise a propelling force of 145 horse-power! Not Lovers of Display. The utmost simplicity is said to char acterize the daily life of the President of Hie French Kejmblie, although on State occasions both M. and Mine. Garnot or ganize their entertainments in far more regal style than any of their predeces sors. But when the President and his wife are alone they like dining off tho homely national dish of a pot au feu, or I it" a few intimate friends are present they l enlarge the menu to include eggs, fish, I lamb or mutton cutlets or broiled chicken. 'THE JOKER'S BUDGET. JESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. Not ({noted Correctly—Before and After —No Leisure —No Money to Lend —More Likely, Etc., Etc. NOT QUOTED CORRECTLY. Tom Noddy—Uncle Ainos, I hear you suid I was a fool the other day. Uncle Amos—l never said you were a fool the other day. J said you had been a fool all the days of your life.—[De troit Free Press. BEFORE AND AFTER. Heforo the maiden married him, And got him in her power, To sew a button on his coat Would take her just one hour. Hut things are very different now; For when her aid he seeks To sew that button on his coat, It takes her several weeks. —[Clothier and Furnisher. NO LEISURE. "I'll wait until you are at leisure," said a culler to the editor. "I'm afraid I'll he no use to you when I'm dead," replied the editor.—[Epoch. NO MONEY TO LEND. "Hello, old chappie! Been makiu' money lately?" "1 should smile; got m' pockets full." "Lend me a V, will yer?" "Oh, I can't yer know; it's all in $1 bills." —[Texas Siftings. MALICE AFORETHOUGHT. Witness—He came towards ine and wanted ter kick me on de leg six times. .Judge—How do you know he had the intention of kicking you six times? Witness—Hekase dat's jess de number ob bluek and blue spots I've got on my leg.—[Texas Siftings. ANOTHER LIB NAILED. F. Parmonter Pvne, '9l—This talk about college graduates not being able to cope with the stern realities of life is all bosh. Why, two of our men uro street car conductors, one is a waiter in a res taurant and one is a letter-carrier, and 1 could mime lots of other cases, too. — [Life. DIFFERENT KINDS OF POPULARITY. Indignant Customer—Look here, you advertise popular prices, and yet you charge me 25 cents for a cup of coffee und a ham sandwich. Proprietor —You'll find those prices very popular with caterers, sir. MORE LIKELY. Mrs. Snooper (reading)— The longest word in the Winnebago language is Shonkhaterahizunhonikoukcinena. It means "1 will give you a horse." Snooper—lt is more likely to give one the lockjaw. INADEQUATE. "No," she snapped, "I won't go to ride with Col. Jones!" "Why not, my dear? He is a perfect gentleman, und" "No liidii can manage a horse," broke in the lass, "and a girl, too, with one urin."—[Atlanta Constitution. A MORAL MAXIM. Whatever our purpose in lifo may be— Whatever our earthly station, We ought to try, thermometer-like, To rise to the situation. —[Philadelphia Times. HALF RATIONS. Tommy—l didn't eat half enough sup per. Bessie—What did you have for sup per? Tommy—Company.—[Puck. RUINED HIS BUSINESS. Mrs. Dogood—Even if you are just out of prison, that does not prevent you from going to work. Dusty it bodes—lt do, mum; they cut my hair, and my business is ruined. Mrs. Dogoou—What business were you in? Dusty lihodes —The Circassian beauty line, mum. JACK PAID FOR IT. Tom —Harry looks as if his supper didn't agree with him. Jack—Well, it ought to have agreed with him; he didn't have to pay for it.— [Yankee Blade. TIIEIR SON JACK. Mr. Breezcy—Our son Jack is getting altogether too large for a youngster. Mrs. Breozey—Oh, well, the child is father to the man, you know! Mr. Breezcy—Very true, lmt Jack seems to consider himself father to the whole family,—[New York Herald. GOOD LUCK UNAPPRECIATED. M iss do Swell (angrily)— You told mo this horseshoe lace pin would bring mo good luck, and now Count de Moneyhunt has proposed to another girl, and my poodle is dead. Jeweler—Madame, what more could heart desire?—[Jeweler's Weekly. FATE. In her brown eyes her woman's soul Shines radiant as the dawn, If we but meet, my self-control Is gone. Her low, sweet brow, her soft, brown hair, Her beauty make complete; When she comes near the very uir Seems sweet. She has a gentle, tender voico That pleases every ear; Whene'er she speaks, men's hearts rejoice To hear. Ami yet, her road to happiness Is barred with iron doors, Because her little brother says She snores. —[Somerville Journal. BLACK BIIEEP DWELL IX EVERY FOLD. She—Oh, yes! I quite believe there's u simpleton in every family. Don't you? He—Well—er—iny opinion is rather biased. You see I'm tin; only member of our family.—[Boston Budget. THEY DIDN'T SING IT. "Let's go up to the Dime Museum and see the picnic party." "What picnic party?" "Why, don't you know? the picnic party that came home on a barge the other night and didn't sing 011 their way 'Home Again from a Foreign Shore.' They are on exhibition.—[Boston Courier. A LOGICAL INFERENCE. "Papa," said Willie, as they sailed down to Stat en Island, "do sea-horses come from the sea?" "Yes, my son." "And do the bay horses all come from the bay?" SILENCING lirnni. Young Father (in the future) — Snakes! Can't you do something to quiet that baby? Its eternal squalling just drives ino wild. Young Mother (calmly to servant) — Marie, bring in my husband's mother's phonograph and put in the cylinder marked "At Ten Months." I want him to hear how his voice sounded when he was young.—[Xew York Weekly. A FOHC.KTFUL SPOUSE. Mrs. Hilkins—l never saw such a for getful man in my life as you are. The clock has stopped again. Mr. Hi I kins—That's because you for got to wind it. Mrs. Hilkins—Huh! You knew very well, Mr. Hilkins, that I told you to re mind me to wind it and you forgot übout it.—[New York Weekly. A CHURL SON. "I understand Juk Jimson struck his mother." "Yes." "The cruel scoundrel. What did h* strike her for?" "Ten dollars." GOT WHAT SHE WANTED. She—An unfortunate alliance, that of Miss Quickly's, wasn't it? lie—Maybe, but he was just her kind. You said, you know, that she wanted u husband, and she certainly got it.— [Yonkers Gazette. A BTVONO GUARANTEE. Miss Flora Wall (to dealer) —You guarantee this cement to be good, do you? Dealer—Yes, ma'am. You could mend a broken heart with that cement. Miss Flora Wall—l'll take three bot tles.—[Fuck. A SURE THING. Daddy—lf you are a good boy I'll tuko you to the circus. Sonnv—Suppose 1 ain't a good boy? Daddy—Then you'll have a circus with me.—[Puck. A SECRET. She —How softly the breezes whisper over this tield. He—Yes, dear—but the corn is all eurs, you know!—[Life. NOTHING MEAN ABOUT HIM. Father (reading it) —Ah, yes, the biy 1 lor you, and the girl's hats. Twen£~ dollurp and ninety-live cents. Nearly ' s2l. No use being mean. 11l buy fivs j cents' worth of black varnish to color my last year's straw and make the bill the full figure.—[Fliegendo Hlaetter. IN A BAD FIX. A—How is Brown coming out? H—Very poorly. He can't eat. "What's the matter witli him?" "There is nothing the matter with him, except lack of food. He is stopping at a fashionable boarding house."— [Texas Siftings. DIDN'T UNDERSTAND IT. "Didn't they sing beautifully in uni son?" he whispered at the opera. "In unison?" re-echoed the Hoston girl; "why I thought they were going to sing in Italian. No wonder I don't un derstand it."—[Philadelphia Times. A BLUSHING SIMILE. She tripped going down to the beach and blushed prettily. "You arc like the leaves of the forest," whispered her escort. "llow so?" she asked. "You turn red with the fall," was the reply. HIS GREETING. She waits each night till I get home, And greets me at the door; But it is not for my sake alone— She wants to know the score. —[Judge. VERY TRUE. Wife—l'm afraid I scolded the chil dren rather severely while making pre serves to-day. Husband —You should have preserved your temper, too. Wife —How could I when I lost it? TUB CHOICEST MORSEL. Mrs. Pert —We had an elegant supper at the sewing society. Mr. Pert—What did you relish most? "Oh, we dissected a watermelon!" "Is that all? 1 thought probably you bad dissected at least a half dozen of the neighbors!" "You're just too hateful!"—[Harris burg Telegram. WHICH ONE? " Yes, the ceremony has been per formed, and John and Mary are one." "Indeed? Which one?" " Well," answered the father of tho bride, "from what I know of Mary's mother, 1 should say—but, ah! here s comes."—[Detroit Free Press. A WORSE PREDICAMENT. First Boy—Did you get squeezed k the crowd at the navy drill yesterday? Second Hoy—No, but I got caught in the jam at home, and that was worse. SHE LEARNED SOMETHING. "Travel is a great educator," remarked Amy. "That's so," replied Sue. "Why, I could not tlirt a bit before 1 made a tour of the watering places." ENCOURAGEMENT. Kidlets—Do you suppose your sister would marry me? Dick Hicks—l guess so; she isn't very bright. Cure for Sunburn. You will get sunburned, of course You may try to just brown slowly, but some early and prolonged exposure will cook you suddenly, and you will b burned. There is just one thing to do. Bathe your face in milk, sour milk, if possible; better still, for twenty minutcf or so, dabbing the face softly. If by that time the soreness is gone, rub the faco dry with your hands. The oil of the milk rubs in and the rest of the milk rubs off dry. If the skin is too sore, let the milk all dry on. It leaves an uncom fortable, shiny crust on tin* face and vou smell of sour milk, but after a couple of hours you will, unless you are burned horribly, find you can wet the faco again with milk, wash off the crust and then rub softly until the skin iw dry. Now powder carefully to make you look a little less like a boiled lobster. By tho next day you should bo all right.—[St. Louis Republic. Remember If. Economy is the parent of integrity, of liberty and of ease, and tho sister of tem perance, of cheerfuUcss and of health; and profuseness is a cruel and crafty demon, that generally involves her fol lowers in dependence and debts, that is, fetters them with "irons into their souls." YOU ARE INVITED To call and inspect our im mense stock of DET GOODS, Groceries, Provisions, FURNITURE, Etc. Our store is full of the new est assortment. The prices are the lowest. All are invited to see our goods and all will be pleased. J. P. McDonald, 8. W. Corner Centre and South Sts., Freeland. FERRY & CHRISTY, deulcrs in Stationary, School Books, Periodicals, Sonar Books, Musical Instruments, CIGARS and TOBACCO, OrOOIDS Window Fixtures and Shades, Mirrors, Pictures and Frames made to order. Pictures enlarged and Framed. Crayon Work a Specialty. 41 Centre Street, Quinn's Building IEWSPAPER PSSSIS the name of every newspaper published, hav ing a circulation rating in the American News paper Directory of more than & r ,000 copies each issue, witli the cost per line lor advertising in them. A list of the best papers of local circula tion, in every city and town of more than 5,000 population with prices by the inch for one month. Special lists of daily, country, village and class papers. Bargain offers or value to small advertisers or those wishing to experi ment Judiciously with a small amount of mono}'. Shows conclusively "how to get the most ser vice for the money," etc., etc. Sent post paid to any address for HO cents. Address, GEO. I'. HOWELL & Co.. Publishers and General Adver tising Agents, 10 Spruce Street, New York City. fa C. D. ROHRBACH, Dealer in Hardware, Paints, Varnish, Oil, Wall Paper, Mining Tools and mining Sup plies of all kinds, Lamps, Globes, Tinware, Etc. Having purchased the stock of Wm. J. Eckert and added a considerable amount to the present stock I am prepared to sell at prices that defy compe tition. Don't forget to try my special brand of MINING OIL. Centre Street, Freeland Pa. E. M. GERITZ, 2fl years in Germany and America, opposite tile Cent in I Hotel, Centre Street, Freelaeu. The Cheapest Repairing Store in town. Watches. Clocks and Jewelry. New Watches, Clocks and Jewelry on hand for the Holi. days; the lowest cash price in town. Jewelry repaired in short notice. All Watch Re pairing guaranteed for one year. Eight Day Clocks from 83.00 to 813.00; New Watches from 81.00 up. E. M. GERITZ, Opposite Central Hotel, Centre St., Freeland. GO TO Fisher Bros. Livery Stable FOR FIRST-CLASS TURNOUTS At Short Notice, for Weddings* Parties and Funerals. Front Street, two £ _ ELM WOOD, 111., NOV. 2U. LTSBS. DR. B.J. KENDALL Co. • ' ar 8 ,r: 1 h av ® always purchased your Ken dall's Spavin Cure by the half dozen Ix.ttles, I would like prices in larger qunnUty. I think It Is one of the nest liniments on earth. I have used It cn my stables for three years. Yours truly, CHAS. A. SNYDER. KENDALL'S SPAVIN CURL DB. b. J. R™ B rs T "' 3-ieBB - Sirs : I desire to give you testimonial of my good opinion of your Kendall s Spavin Cure. I have used It for LainenesM, Stiff Joints and Hon vins, and 1 have found it a sure cure, I cordi ally recommend it to all horsemen. Your, truly, A. H. Giuntn-r, Manager Troy Laundry Stables. KENDALL'S SPAVIN CURE. ~ R. WniTOK COUSTT, OHIO, Deo. 19, less. DR. B. J. KENDALL CO. Ueuts: I feel it my dnty to say what I have done with your Kendall's Bpav(n Cure. I have cured twenty five horses thut had HpaYlna, ten of King B?ne, nine afflicted with Big Head and seven of HIB J aw. Since I have had one of your books and followed the directions, I have never lost a case of any kind. Yours truly, ANDREW TURNER, Horse Doctor. KENDALL'S SPAVIN CURE. ftice $1 per bottle, or six bottles for |5. All Drug gists havejt or can get It for you, or it will be sent to any address on receipt of price by the proprie tors. DR. B. J. KENDAI I. CO., Enosburgh Falls, VL SOLD BY ALL DKUGGIBTS. A. RUDEWICK, GENERAL STORE. SOUTH HEBERTON, PA. Clothing, Groceries, Etc., Etc. Agent for the sale of PASSAGE TICKETS From all the principal points in Europe to all points in the United States. Agent for the transmission of MONEY To all parts of Europe. Checks, Drafts, and Letters of Exchange on Foreign Banks cashed at reasonable ratsß. S. RUDEWICK, Wholesale Dealer In Imported Brandy, Wine And All Kinds Of LIQUORS. THE BEST Beer, Bcrter, -<£>-le -A_n.d. Brown Stont- Foreign and Domestic. Cigars Kept on Hand. S. RUDEWICK, SOUTH HEBERTON. the laws, Showing Patents, Caveats, Tra