THE BEETLE.
The shrilling locnst slowly sbenthes
His dagger voice, and creeps away
Ben at h the brooding leaves where breathes
TBe zephyr of the dying daj.
One naked star has waded through
The purple shallows of the night,
And faltering as falls the dew-
It drips its misty light.
O'er garden b'ooms,
On tides of musk,
The beetle booms adown the glooms
And bumps along the dusk.
The katydid is rasping at I
The silence from the tangled broom:
On drunken wings the flitting bat
Goes Btaggering athwart the gloom,
Ibe toadstool bugles through the weeds,
And lavishly to left and right
The flre-flies like golden seeds,
Are sown about the night.
O'er slumbrous blooms,
On floods of musk,
The beetle booms adown the glooms
And bumps along the dusk.
The primrose flares its baby-liands,
Wide open is the empty moon,
Slow lifted from the underlands,
Drifts up the azure-arched lagoon;
The shadows on the garden walk
Are frayed with rifts of silver light;
And trickling down the poppy-stalk,
The dewdrop streaks the night.
O'er folded blooms,
On swirls of musk, "
The beetle booms adown the glooms
And bumps ulong the dusk.
—[James Whitcomb Riley.
GREEK MET GREEK.
BY EMMA S. ALLEN.
Mrs. Winston's parlors were filled with
young people on the occasion of her third j
party that season. It was a bright May
evening, and the warm air, laden with
rose-breaths from the garden, came i
through the open windows to meet the
sounds of music and laughter that floated
out. Everybody was having a good time
—it would be impossible to have any- j
thing else at Mrs. Winston's. She was :
the acknowledged leader of Springfield
society. Nobody had ever entered the
lists as her rival. :
Mrs. Winston stood between the por- I
tieres dividing the front drawing-room . i
frim the square hall, chatting with
her latest arrived guest, William Norman. 1
4 'You don't mean to tell me that you
have never met Miss Dana?" she ejacul
ated.
4t lt is true. I have never met Miss
Dana, although I have seen her u very
few times. Since the family moved to i
Springfield I have been away n great
deal. She is very beautiful."
4 'Yes-, the men say so, and most of the i
girls are jealous of her. She will suit !
you precisely—she is a born flirt."
He laughed lightly as he threw back
his handsome head.
44 0h, what au insinuation!"
4 'One that you justly deserve," laughed '
his hostess. "Don't waste time in thread- I
bare denials. Come and let me introduce j
you to Myrtle."
They crossed the room to where Miss
Dana stood listlessly carry on a common- \
place conversation with a commonplace
young man of twenty-one summers. She
was by far the headsomest girl in the '
room, and the most exquisitely dressed.
Her beauty was of a singularly rare type.
She was neither a blonde nor a brunette,
having deep, violet-blue eyes, a pure,
apple-blossom complexion, and dark
hair the color of brown sea-weed,
as full of natural ripples as the eddies of |
a stream. Her dress, although no more
elegant than a dozen others, had a pecu- 1
liar effect. It was a soft, lustreless silk of
a pearly whiteness, frosted about her
white arms and throat with cob-web
lace. She wore a large corsage bouquet
of waxen snow-drops, and the cold
whiteness was lighted by the flash of two
diamond solitaires in her cars and a
thread-like necklace of very small bril
liants close about her snowy throat.
"She is the Snow Queen," said Norman
to Mrs. Winston.
"Exactly; but only in appearance.
There is nothing cold about her."
Five minutes later Norman had mon
opolized her society. It was always the i
signal for other men to retire into the
background when William the Conquer
or put in an appearance. Not that he
was in the least degree overbearing and
egotistical. There was nothing in his
maimer to indicate that lie had discov
ered what a remarkably handsome fellow
he was. He stood erect and strong, a few
inches taller than any other man in the i
room. His splendid form alone, and his
air of graceful self-possession, would
have made him a king, socially, without
his fair, captivating face. It was a face
as striking in its contrasts as Miss Dana's,
and its exact opposite. He possessed the
unusual combination of dark-brown eyes
and blonde hair—not astilT, washed-out,
fuzzy growth, cut pompadour—but soft'
and glossy, with a wavy inclination that
the barber never quite subdued.
Nearly all the girls in Springfield had
bpen in love with him, at one time or
another—some of them more or less vio
lently. The majority of them had re
covered with only superficial scars—
others had not. But us yet there had
been no early graves.
"I have heard a great deal about you,
Mr. Norman, '' Miss Dana replied.
"Indeed! I hope it is nothing very
disparaging."
She smiled very doubtfully as she shook
her head.
"That is a vain hope. It's something
disparaging—something very wicked."
lie took up a long-handled Japanese
fan from the table, one of the many that
the hostess had scattered through the
rooms in a promiscuous fashion.
"I wish you would tell me what it is,"
he said, tracing with his finger the hide
ously distorted outlines of Japanese art.
4 'l have never absconded with anybody's
valuables."
"Perhaps not in bank-notes, but I hear
that you have no mercy in stealing away
feminine hearts—that you urea most in
corrigible flirt."
"Oh, ' he laughed, folding his hands
behind him, " that is precisely what I
have heard about you—the 'incorrigible
flirt' part of your sentence." °
"Is it?"—laughing carelessly. "Then
it is Greek met Greek."
"Exactly. Shall we measure swords
and enter into combat, to determine
which of us is most deserving of the title V
J? 01 answer, she extended her white
satin and ivory fun, and he instantly
measured its length with the kindred
gutta-perclm sticks of the Sunrise King
dom.
"Is it war to the knife?" she asked
mirthfully.
"Yes-, and the fork, too. We will go
to supper together."
He scarcely left her side during even
ing. She certainly was not out of his
sight until her carriage had driven away
in the early hours of morning, leavin fr
him standing half bewildered' on the
sidewalk.
The next evening he spent in Judge
Dana's parlor. At first the judge and
his wife and two rosebuds of girls, yet
outside the portals of society, chatted
indifferently on commonplace topics, but
they soon retired discreetly, leaving
Myrtle a clear field and unlimited power
to torture, her latest victim.
If she had been fascinating in the
Snow Queen garb, Norman found her
very much more so in a simply-made
house-dress of dark silk. She played
and sang for him in a manner that indi
cated no superficial knowledge of music.
"Since you are such a lover of music,
you will enjoy the opera to-morrow
night. It will be a treat for Springfield
people to hear 'Martha.' Shall we go?"
He had been thanking her for Abt's
"Good-night, my love," and was tearing
himself away.
"I shall be delighted," said Myrtle.
"Papa intended to take us girls."
He had not waited five minutes in the
easiest cliair in the judge's parlor the fol
lowing evening when she entered the
room, a striking contrast to the Snow
Queen, to be sure, but quite as charming j
in black velvet sparkling with musically- j
clinking jets, with Gold of Ophir roses i
on her bosom, corresponding exactly ■
with the artificial roses on the black-lace \
bonnet. Even the long tan gloves were !
buttoned, and her fan was in her hand. I
Norman's astonishment revealed itself
in his eyes.
"What a remarkable young lady you
are, Miss Dana!" he said, holding her |
hand longer and closer than twenty-four .
hours' separation justified.
"Oh, certainly," she assented, stop
ping back a little. "It is against my j
principles to keep any one waiting.
I Punctuality is one of my best virtues."
I "And their name is Legion."
"Oh, no, indeed ! lam not an angel.
My virtues are sadly overshadowed by
my faults."
He stood looking at her as though he ]
had forgotten all about the match game
at which they were playing with edged {
tools. |
"I have yet to discover in what respect
you are not angelic," he declared.
"Oh," she gasped, with a gesture of j
impatience, "don't say anything to mc j
that you do not mean. Or, is flattery one
of your flirtation weapons ?"
There was a momentary impression of |
seriousness in his splendid eyes, but he
quickly collected his wits.
"I always mean exactly what I say," he 1
said, smiling. "I certainly did just now. j
If you chose to habit yourself in such i
celestial-looking raiment at Mrs. Wins- j
ton's, the other night, I was not to be !
blamed for recognizing the resemblance ,
i you bore to angelic beings. That was not j
| what I called you then, however. You
I looked like a Snow Queen."
"That sounds better. It suits my cold
hcarted selfishness."
After that night the game became very j
interesting, both to the contestants and
to the curious eyes of the spectators in
the arena of Springfield society. Not
that anybody suspected that it was a J
game, entered into by mutual consent. I
The Dana family had no such conception, '
i or the sedate judge and his excellent 1
1 wife would have rested more uneasily in
their shoes. As it was, they only hoped |
I that Myrtle had found her real hero at j
last, and would settle down into a genu-
I iue love alTair.
| A month slipped by, and the .Tune roses '
I were making the air drunken with their
sweetness. Norman declared he had i
never enjoyed a month so much in his '
I Ufe
-44A flirtation is a delightful affair un
' der such circumstances," remarked Myr
, tie. 44 IIave I proved to you that you
are a worse flirt than I am?"
I 44 Not at all. Shall we try for another
mouth?"
| 44 With all my heart," was the careless
i reply.
! The following month was, if possible,
gayer than the first; but toward its close
people began to go to the sea-coast or
| the moumtains or the lakes, and they were
left to the quiet enjoyments they liked
I best. Springfield gossips had satisfied
i themselves that the case had passed its cri- |
1 sis and would culminate in a wedding and
j so left oil their continued vigilance,
j At the end of the second month Nor
. man was in a very serious mood.
I 4 'l am going away with my sisters next
j week to be gone the rest of the summer,"
J Myrtle told him, one evening. 44 1 sup
i pose you will be off for soineof the wat-
I ering-places in search of other worlds to
: conquer?"
1 44 1 have not thought of going anv
; where. Does the second month's end
! count me out ?"
44 Oh, not necessarily."
44 Are you tired of inc ? "
44 N0; certainly not. I think you arc
the only man I ever knew that I have
| really enjoyed."
44 Thank you," said he, gravely—so
gravely that she blushed consciously.
4 4 There is more than that for me to
acknowledge. I have enjoyed you so
much that I do not sec how I can ever
live without you."
Miss Dana started. She had won
dered, now and then, if this would
come, but had tried to convince herself
that it never would. Bhc made a
feeble effort to misconstrue his meaning.
44 You surely do not wish to prolong
this nonsense indefinitely ?"
44 No; I want the nonsense to end and
the reality to begin."
She was sitting listlessly in one of the
rich chairs, idling with the flowers he
brought her. He came from where he
stood by the mantelpiece and rested an
arm on the rolling back of the chair,
bending over her brown head.
44 1 love you, Myrtle."
She turned quickly and looked at him
doubtfully, the burning blush on her
cheeks spreading to the very tips of her
ears.
44 Mr. Norman, you are carrying the
ejst too far,"she exclaimed, still parry
ing. 44 This was not in the agreement."
44 IIang the agreement! I broke my
part of it long ago—as long ago as the third
time I ever saw you—the night we went
to hear 4 Martha. l "
4 'Then you have not been playing
fair."
She was half laughing, half crying.
44 1 have not been playing at all, I have
been in dead earnest. I could not help
it, dear. I simply went on loving you
better and better every day I lived."
She suddenly sprang from the chair,
and the flowers were trampled under her
feet.
<4 ls this the way you end all your flirta
i tions?"
Her words cut him deeply, but he kept
I his temper.
4, 1 deserve some condemnation for my
past offeuses, I admit, but not for that.
As I live, I never told any other woman
that I loved her. We have done wrong,
you and I, in trifling with a sacred mat
ter. I never realized how deeply wrong
until my love for you grew to be so holy
i a thing. Can I wring a like confession
l from your lips?"
I bhc stood with downcast eyes and
. clasped hands, her bosom heaving. l\a
, ; came and put out hs hands to take hers
I but she stepped back from him with are
polling gesture.
! 44 1 will confess the wrong lhave done.
! but not the other." she said.
"You will not confess any love for
me?"
"I am not sure that I have any to con
fess. You have taken an unfair advantage
of me, and you cannot blame me if you
suffer for your own folly."
"I have a great deal at stake. Do not
trifle with me."
"Trifle? It is rather late to hang out
the danger-signal. When unskilled fen
cers trifle with sharp swords in place of
the wooden ones tliey have practiced
with, it is no wonder that they arc
wounded. They deserve to be."
"You mean that you have not escaped
injury any more than I have?"
"No; I do not mean that, in the sense
you do. I am sorry for you, but Ido
not love you. All I can think of now is
my wicked folly."
He stood frowning in silence for a few
moments, watching the tears that shone
on her drooped lids.
"And you send ine away?"
"Yes; and the sooner you forget me
the better."
"And the sooner I go the better?"
4 'Perhaps, since your staying will do
no good."
"Do you flatter yourself that you have
won the prize in tiiis wretched contest?"
44 Hush! You have been as much to
blame as I. You need not taunt me."
44 1 have been, Ido not deny, but lam
not now. You will live to be sorry for
this, I trust."
He was gone before she could stay him
with the unnoticed gesture of her hand,
and, woman like, she would have given
the half of her kingdom to have called
him back.
She went away the next week, into
the mountains with her sisters, and
when she returned to Springfield in the
fall she held herself aloof from all soci
ety for a few weeks, and then went off to
California to spend the winter.
As for Norman, nobody knew where
he was. It was generally understood
that the biter had been bitten at last,
but there was not much sympathy for
him. With human inconsistency, how
ever, everybody heaped maledictions
upon Miss Dana's offending head.
Over n year after the climax of his
woes, Norman found it imperative to at
tend to some business in the hated town.
He went about it as quietly as possible,
and hoped to get away without meeting
any society magnates; but he came face
to face with the brightest star in the
constellation, and one day found himself
keeping an engagement to lunch with
Mr. and Mrs. Winston.
An hour after luncheon, as he sat in the
little lady's sitting-room, the postman
brought around the afternoon mail.
"Three letters for me?" she cried, as
the maid handed them to her. "How
! delightful ! One from old auntie, one
from Sister Tibbie, and one—hum ! one
' from California."
! The word California did not seem to
awaken any emotions in Norman's breast,
if his face was an indication. Mrs.
Winston concluded that he did not know
that the whole Dana family had moved
to the Golden State on account of the
judge's health.
"I have a delightful correspondent out
in that charming State, Mr. Norman.
Would you like to listen to this letter of
hers?"
"Oh, certainly. I have the California
fever very strong, and read everything I
see about it."
Mrs. Winston did not take the precau
tion to read the letter privately at first,
but began, without preliminary explana
tion, a bright newsy letter, in which no
! personal mention was made of anybody
j except 4 'papa," whose health was steadily
improving, and 44 mamma 1 ' and 44 the
j girls. 1 ' Then came the closing part of the
, epistle that performed its mission as its
writer had little dreamed it would do.
44 1f you continue to urge me so pcr
! sistently I may come East next summer
I and stop for a wesk or two at Springfield,
jto visit you. Nobody else will, in all
i probability, care to sec me, as you say
| you are the only one who has ever for
| given me of the double sin of robbing so
j ciety of William the Conqueror, as well
j as ruining my own good fortune in bring
ing him to my feet. (I have looked at
your last letter—that is exactly the way
you worded it.) Well, you have done
better for me, in forgiving me, than I
shall ever do for myself. That I shall
never do, especially the bare falsehood I
told him when I said that I did not love
him. Before he had closed the door af
ter him I realized that I had sent away
the only man on the green earth who
ever could be anything to me. It was
all pride, Margery. lam sure, yet, that
he would always have thought, though
lie might not have said it, that I had
been seriously exerting myself all through
that contemptible game we played, to
win him. Hatlier than marry him under
such an impression, I chose to break my
heart as well as his. Indeed, I think his
stands a much better show of being
patched up and glazed over than mine
ever can. I shall live and die an old
maid, in sedate penance. Forgive this
sentimental confession. In your eyes at
least, I wanted to be understood."
Mrs. Winston did not read the name
that was crowded into the last corner of
the full second sheet. She looked across
at Will blazing eyes.
44 Istliat letter from Miss Daua?"
<4 You know it, I see. She will never
forgive me for reading it to you, but
I could not resist the temptation. If I
had hesitated a moment 1 would not have
read the last part; but 4 he who hesitates
is lost.' It was a golden opportunity. I
think you had better try again, Will."
lie was walking the lloor in his excite
ment.
"If you will please give me that letter
I will take it back to her," he said, at
length. "I am going to start for Cali
fornia to-morrow morning."
A week luter he was viewing the
placid waters of the Pacific from the
wide piazza of a pretty villa on the
mountain side, just above picturesoue
Santa Cruz. The January sua poured a
flood of springtime warmth upon green
lawns ana flowering geraniums, and
upon his own uncovered, golden head.
"Since you insist upon it, and the
notion has been growing upon me, I will
endeavor to transfer iny worldly posses
sions to the golden West," he was say
ing. " But it will not take three
months to make the chnuge."
Myrtle was arrauging a bouquet of
roses, sitting beside him on the steps.
" It is a shockingly short engagement.
I cannot possibly make it a day less.
William the Conqueror cannot have
everything his own way," she said.
" That reminds me, my dear, that this
is emphatically a 'Norman Conquest,'"
remarked the hero, seuteutiously.—
[Frank Leslie's.
THE San Francisco Examiner 6ays that
the fashion of wearing wooden shoes is
growing into favor in this country as 1
in England. By the aid of machinery a i
really neat and comfortable wooden shoe
can be made so stylish that no young
woman need be ashamed to wear it on ;
the street.
The official report of the loss of the Turk- i
ish man-of-war Ertogrul says that 587 per
sons were drowned und s xty-six saved.
SOMEWHAT STRANGE
ACCIDENTS AND INCIDENTS OF
EVERY DAY LIFE.
Queer Episodes and Thrilling Adven
tures Which Show that Truth is
Stranger than Fiction.
KINO JONATHAN CHARLES FREDERICK,
who reign? over the Mosquito reservation,
in the Nicaraguan territory, is one of the
most remarkable "monarchs" outside of
Central Africa. King Frederick has
only been a short time in power, and is a :
man about twenty-eight years of age, of i
small stature, and thickly built. He i
dresses in a navy blue uniform,somewhat i
like that of a New York policeman, J
trimmed with gold lace and ornamented \
with brass buttons, and wears epaulets of :
black velvet, marked with the letter"M," I
and the same letter graces the front of
the small cap which covers his head. The ,
king's enemies say that he is a man of ]
weak character and a heavy drinker. In |
fact, they go so far as to assert that ,
whiskey of the strongest character is too ' i
weak to suit his majesty's taste; so he ;
dilutes his whiskey with Worcestershire
sauce and Chili vinegar. King Frederick
has always lived at Blueficlds or at Corn
Island, where, in his earlier days, he
*'worked cargo" for the different steam
ship lines, shelled cocoanuts, or turned ;
his hand to anything that would produce
his meal. The predecessor of his maj
esty had no family, and after his death
(due to poison administered by a mem
ber of the Council, according to popular
rumor) King Frederick, who is a distant
relative of the late ruler of the reservation,
ascended the throne. The king's salary
is 200 soles a month, "without expenses."
One has heard of a good many extraor
dinary suicides, and of a good many
people who, despising such common helps
out of life as the rope, the river or the
pistol, have taken pains to shuttle off
this mortal coil by means not generally
used. Purely, however, we think, has
anyone adopted the plan of running up
aud down stairs us fast as possible in the
hope of terminating his or her existence.
Such a course was resorted to lately iu
Berlin by a young lady. She wassuffer-
ing, it appears, from heart disease, and I
possibly tliis may have been the origin of
her suicidal ideas. In any case, having
been warned by her medical attendant
that any great emotion or exertion might
prove fatal, and having also been spec
ially forbidden to go up or down stairs,
she profited by the instructions to do
precisely what she was told not to do, in
order to kill herself. Being left alone
one day at home, she began running up
and down three flights of stairs, contin
uing the exercise for an hour, when she
sank down on the floor quite exhausted.
She did not, however, die, as, according
to the doctors, she ought to have done;
and after restoratives had been adminis
tered she was as well as ever, much to her
distress, as she really believed she would j
have accomplished her purpose.
AN interesting romance comes from I
the Crow Creek Reservation. B. F. I
Baleh, a badly crippled veteran of the I
civil war, now a settler on these lauds,
has just received intelligence which;
makes his heart glad. Some fourteen
I years ago, while living in Missouri, Mr.
Batch's little girl, then 5 years old, was
stolen from her home by some unknown
persons, and for many years although
much money and time were spent in the
search, 110 trace of the lost one could be
found. A communication of his to the
authorities at Washington recently in
regard to his pension was published in
the newspapers and caught his daughter's
cyo, who had been residing in Texas.
She at once opened up communication
with Mr. Balch, and with the aid of a
pair of ear-rings on her at the time of
her capture and in other ways convinced
him that she was beyond all doubt his
long-lost daughter, and whom he had
long since given up all hope of ever
seeing again. The unbounded delight
of the father can better be imngiued
than described, and he can hardly con
tain himself until her arrival, she having
left her home in Texas to join her father
in his reservation home.
A MARVELOUS recovery from paralysis
is reported from Eureka, Tex. The pa
tient, Joel Norton, had been unable to
move either of his lower limbs and one
of his arms for three years, and was
hound to an invalid's chair, hopelessly,
it was supposed, by the grim hand of
muscular paralysis, but the sight of his
little daughter Lilian in flames broke
the bones of his living death. The child
ran into the room where her father lay
with her dress on fire, screaming and fly
ing about, when, without thought of his
condition, her parent sprang to his feet
and catching up a rug wrapped her
tightly iu it and succeeded iu extinguish
ing the flames. I lis excitement dying
out, he realized that he was once again
capable of motion, and actually fainted
from joy and the nervous reaction.
Physicians declare it a miraculous restor
ation of vital force, and have visited him
from all parts of the country. Mr. Nor
ton has walked two miles daily since his
recovery, and can scarcely be induced to
go to bed at night for fear lest his
malady attack him while he is asleep.
He has also resumed his occupation,
which is that of a machinist.
A MONTH'S imprisonment for occasion- 1
ing the death of a woman by cutting j
open one of the veins in her arm appears
a light sentence, but probably, altnough
no statement to that effect is made, the
German tribunal, before which a man
named Michael Stankewitz appeared,
charged with the crime, took into con
sideration that he acted under influence
of a superstitious belief in sorcery and
witches. The accused, a mason by trade,
employed at Dantzic, came to the con
clusion a short time ago that
his wife was bewitched, on
what ground docs not appear. He
also came to the conclusion that the per
son who had cast a spell "on her was a
poor old creature named Nixdorf, and to
break the spell he determined to bleed
the alleged sorceress in the arms, his
wife drinking her blood. Unfortunately
the operation was attended with fatal
consequences. The old woman, whose
constitution was already weakened by
age and privation, succumbed to loss of
blood, and the authorities hearing of the
affair, arrested the mason.
A LETTER from Adclaido, Australia, to
tho Pall Mall Gazette, says that while
Capt. Hepworth, of the steamship Port
Adelaide, was taking his sights he
noticed a large sperm whale alongside,
so close that his spouting wet the deck.
Tho creature had evidently lost his
"school" and mistaken the ship for one
of his own species. He remained with
it for four days and nights and traveled
890 nautical or 1,025 statute miles with
out a rest, and, as far as one could gath
er, without food. lie was never more
than seventy yards away, and for the
most part close against the ship under
her quarter, where the draft made the
swimming easier for him. The
length of the animal was about forty
seven feet. The first day he was very
lively, diving frequently beneath the
ship's bottom, on one occasion scratch
ing himself severely. After that ho kept
j close alongside like a tired Newfound
land dog.
A KKMARKAiiLE accident occurred at
the Peuryn quarry, Placer, Cal., recant
ly, by which John E. Owens lost a foot.
Mr. Owens was engaged with others in
hoisting rock from the ouarry with a
! derrick. An immense load was swinging
out of the pit when the derrick cable
broke and tne granite fell back with a
crash. The stone did not hit any one,
but the broken rope went hissing through
the air like a shot, and the flying end
caught Mr. Owens around the left leg at
the ankle joint. The force of the blow
must have been extreme, for the foot was
severed from the leg by the stroke as
completely as if it had been cut off with
a broad ax. Dr. Todd was sent for and
he amputated the leg just above the cut
made by the rope, and Mr. Owens is do
ing well under the circumstances. The
accident is an odd one.
TIIE story related below furnishes
thinking material for superstitious train
men : A newspaper reporter with a fer
tile imagination has discovered that mail
car No. 48, belonging to the Illinois
Central Puilroad, is haunted and en
vironed by a pale of bad luck. Since a
clerk died in the car it has been per
turbed by doors flying open without
cause and bolts falling out in spite of
the strongest efforts from monkey
wrenches to secure them beyond loosen
ing influence of the jar or ghost, and
that even the well known magic power
of an old horseshoe has exercised no
potency over the spirit of unrest. When
that remedy fails the car must be in a
bad way, at least it will appear so to
trainmen who, as a class, are as super
stitious as sailors.
IIENUY BASSFORD, when he was driv
ing home from Suisun, Cal., the other
day, saw a large bull snake stretched
across the road, and lie thought it would
be a good joke to run the wheel of his
cart over the reptile. lie did so and the
next instant the wriggling, squirming
five-foot monster was in his lap, brought
up from the ground by the revolution of
the wheel. Henry kicked aud frisked
about and the snake hissed and struck at
everything in reach. The situation be
came so uncomfortable that he decided
to throw himself from the cart, but in
an endeavor to do so he became entang
led in some manner and the horse be
came frightened and ran a considerable
distance, dragging Mr. Bassford and
bruising him up severely. When he had
stopped the horse his snakeship was
missing.
THERE is a German living in Brooklyn,
N. Y., who follows a peculiar avocation.
This man goes, on request, to the back
yards of his customers who keep hens
but do not know how to kill them skill
fully, or do not like to do so, aud there
catches and slaughters as many fowls as
may be desired, in a thoroughly business
like and expeditious maimer. No flop
ping and headless birds bowl around the
yard to the terror of the children and the
j horror of the women, but they die gen
teelly and quietly, and the hen-butclicr
I pockets his little fee.
A FIRE was caused in a singular way
the other day in Highland Park, oppo
site New Brunswick, N. J. The large
I and handsome country residence of Mr.
I Peter Zimmerman was discovered tp be
lon lire. The flames were first seen in a
bay window at the cast end of the third
story hall, where the sun was shining in.
It is concluded that the fire was started
by a dimple in the window gluss con
tracting the sun's rays. The flames were
quickly extinguished by using water
from the tank 011 the roof.
THERE is a curiosity in Carrollton,
Ala., in the way of an eyeless mule colt.
The colt is three or four months old. It
is very well developed in every other re
spect, but it has no eyes and no place for
them. The face where its eyes should bo
| is as smooth as its jaws, yet has eye mus
cles, for the hide contracts regularly as if
batting its eyes, but has no eyes and no
e}'e shape.
A Los ANGELES paper describes a to
mato tree growing in that city. It i 9 a
native of Guatemala, and the fruit grows
in clusters, the tomatoes being smooth
and perfectly oval in shape. They are
now green, but they will turn first yellow
and theu goto a glowing red, when they
will be ripe. They taste very much like
the ordinary tomato.
THE horrors of "L'Homme qui Hit"
have been repeated in Russia. A band
of professional beggars were caught in
the act of disfiguring a child whom they
had kidnapped, for the purpose of mak
ing her an object of pity when begging.
The band included two children with
out tongues. All the members of the
gang were disfigured.
A HINGUI.AU story is told by the mas
ter of the sailing ship Linnet, recently
at Singapore, India. When the ship was
off the island of St. Paul's, one of tho
sailors fell overboard. Every effort was
mndc to rescue the man, but before the
boat could reach him a number of albat
rosses pounced upon his head and pecked
him to death.
Bears Plentiful in Oregon.
Reports from various mountain sec
tions about this valley iudicate that bears
arc more numerous this season than for
a long time. Up on the ridges betweeu
Ashland and Wagner creek, and over on
Grizzly Peak bears have been sheep
huntiug and berry picking, and up <i
Emigrant ('reck, on the high ridge be
tween the two main forks, two fine
beeves belonging to J. M. Tyler have
been 4 'butchered to make an ursine holi
day." One of them was a cow that would
have dressed 700 pounds, and she had
been killed ovidcutly by a whole party
of bears, as the scene of the killing,
under a sheltering tree where the cow
was sleeping when attacked, showed the
ground to be trampled over by bears' feet
which left tracks as numerous as sheep
tracks in a cainp corral. The stock men
up that way have been out in force hunt
ing for the bears, and Mr. Rush and
otheis killed one last week—a mealy
nosed fellow who won't join in the berry
and beef revels any more.—[Aj9hlund
(Oregon) Tidings.
Antiquity of Gloves.
The antiquity of gloves is very great.
They doubtless antedate history, for the
earliest literature alludes to them. They
have been known and worn from the re
mote ages of the world. Homer, in the
Odyssey, describes Laertes, the farmer
king, the father of Ulysses, in his retire
ment: "While gloves secured his hands
to shield thou from the thorns." Xcno
phon jeers at tho Persians for wearing
gloves as a protection from the cold.
"Not only did they have umbrellas borne
over them iu the summer," he says, "but
in winter it is not sufficient for them to
clothe their heads and their bodies and
their feet, but they have coverings made
of hair for their bands and their fingers."
The Romans scorned such effeminacy at
that time, but wo are told that about
tho time of Christ the amanuensis of i
Pliny, the historian, wore gloves to keep !
his fingers nimble in cold weather.— j
I Commercial Advcitiser.
THE JOKERS BUDGET.
JESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY 1
MEN OF THE PRESS.
Wanted a Couple—Heavy Piea —A
Lesson from Experience—More <
Remarkable, Ktc., Etc.
WANTED A COUPLE.
"I see," said a man, entering a cater
er's establishment, "that you advertise
weddings furnished?"
"Yes, sir," replied the caterer,briskly.
"I wish you'd send a couple to my 1
house right away. I've two daughters
I'd like to get off my hands."- —[Bazar.
10.
Duncan—So you and the handsome
Bramble girl are one?
Titcomb—That's what I thought
when the minister married us, but I have
since concluded that we are ten.
Duncan -What do you mean?
Titcomb—She is one and I'm
naught.-[Epoch.
A VALUABLE FAMILY RELIC.
Billiams—l have taken a fancy to that
cane you sport, Gilliams. Would you
sell it?
Gilliams—Wouldn't dispose of it for
any consideration. It's an old family
heirloom; my great-grandfather used to
belabor my great-grandmother with it.
[Jewelers' Circular.
A FALLACY.
In Washington.
Bagley—Well, I suppose necessity
is the mother of invention.
Patent Office Employe—You wouldn't
thiuk so if you worked in the Patent Of
fice.
HEAVY PIEfS.
Climsonbeak—Burglars got into my
house last night and got away with six of
my wife's pies!
Yeast—How in the world did they
get in?
"That isn't the question. How did
they get out after eating the pies, I won
der?" —[Yonkers Stutesman.
AND THE BAND PLAYED —A QUICKSTEP.
Arabella, alone with her beau,
In the dim light of gas burning leau,
Heard a step on the stair,
Turned the gas up full flare,
And said to her worshiper, "Gcaut
Pupa has his boots on, I kueau 1"
—[New York Herald.
NO CHANGE.
"Mother, I can't stand this," objected
the young wife to her mother, "Harry
keeping me up this way till 2 or ;! o'clock '
almost every night since we've been mur
ricd."
"You might have expected it of him,"
was the reply.
"Why, 1 should like to know?"
"Just because it is his nature. What
i ho did before marriage he is not likely
to change afterwards."—[Philadelphia
| Times.
HOW HE KNEW.
J "Pop," said Billy Blossom, of St.
, Louis, "I seed a dude down street."
"How d'ye know he was a dude,
Billy?"
"Cos he had a collar on."—[Epoch.
A BOLD BEGGAB.
i "Do give me a kiss, my dear—just
• one!"
' 'Don't annoy me, sir. and let me tell
you once for all that if you ask for such a
favor again I'll have you arrested for
begging without a license."—[Flicgende
Blaettcr.
SOLVING THE DIFFICULTY.
She—lsn't it terrible that ice should be
so dear in the summer and coal so dear
in the winter?
1 Chappie—Yaas. Now, if wo could
only have the wintah in the summah
time and summah in the wintah every
' thing would be just right, Bah Jove!—
1 [New York Herald.
I AS THEY STATED IT.
Funnyman—A fine pair of bays you
have there, Mr. Horsey. Raised in Mas
sachusetts, I suppose.
Horsey—Why do you suppose they
were raised in Massachusetts?
"Massachusetts is the Bay State, isn't
it?"
"To see you bcstraddlo a nag, Mr.
Funnyman, one would take you for a
Green Mountin' Boy".—[Texas Sittings.
SWEETLY FEMININE.
Emma—Does my dress hang all right,
dear?
I.ueile—lt certainly deserves to. The
style is positively criminal!
AN IMPOSSIBILITY.
"I understand that Bullion, the rich
banker, used to write poetry."
"Impossible. Bullion prides himself up
on being a self-made man, nnd poets are
born, not mude, y'know."
A LESSON FROM EXPERIENCE.
Young Husband—l want a family
jar.
Crockery Dealer—H'm—bow long have
you been married?
"Three weeks."
"Had a visit from your wife's mother
yet?"
"No —she's coming next week."
Crockery Dealer (in a fatherly tone) —
Then I wouldn't buy one now, my son.
Maybe the old lady will bring on e when
she coincs. My wife's mother has been
visiting us regularly for the last fifteen
years, and she never has failed to bring
, one yet.—[Epoch.
MEASURING BY TnE EVE.
t Young Lady—l want a pair of shoes,
large and comfortable. Two will do.
| New Boy (glancing at her foot)— Mr.
( Leather, the lady wants two shoes, large
and comfortable. Where's that box of
Bixcs?—[Good News.
IT DIDN'T wonK.
Wliiffcrs—See here, Bliffcrsl You
told me the way to win a girl was to de
vote myself to her mother.
Bliffers—Yes, sirree, that will do it
very
Wliiffcrs—Huh! I wanted to win
Miss Beauti, and I took your advice, and
devoted myself to Mrs. Beauti, and now
the old lady, who is a widow, wants to
marry me herself.—[New Y'ork Weekly.
HE SHOULD nAVK DIED YOUNG.
He—l don t believe in the Darwinian
theory, the survival of the fittest and all
that.
She (scanning him carefully)— The
survival of the fittest—neither do I.
POtSONED DARTS.
Great Belle (four seasons) —I presume
| you are going to Miss Tiptop's outing
party ?
| ltival Belle—(first season) —N—o, Y
I wasn't invited.
I Great Belle—(maliciously)—lndeed !
' How very strange! lam going.
Rival Belle—Yes, 1 heard they had
finally secured a Y'ork
| Weekly.
HE PROBABLY DESERVED HIS LUCK.
Cholly—l think I shall sign as catcher
with some base-ball team next Beason,
my deah chappie.
Chappie—Why, what put that into
your head}
Cholly—o, I think I'm splendidly
qualified. Almost everywhere I've called
I've caught the people out. See? Hal
Hal—[Drake's Magazine.
EXCEPTIONS.
Johnny Cumso —I don't like Freddy
Fangle. He talks too much out of his
mouth.
Mrs. Cumso (reprovingly)— Did you
ever know people to talk except with
their mouths?
Johnny Cumso—Yessum. Deaf and
dumb people talk with their hands.—
[Bazar.
THE nonniD BOY.
Musical Lady—Wouldn't you like to
be able to sing and play, my little man ?
Johnny—Naw. I wouldn't like to
have folks say such mean things about
me as they do about you.—[Munscy's
Weekly.
X DIFFERENCE OF OPINION.
Miss Summit—l had a long conversa
tion about art with Miss Dinwiddio the
other evening, and found her so
thoroughly stupid.
Mr. Clevcrton—You surprise me! Wo
talked the other evening for an hour,
and I thought she was remarkably in
telligent.
Miss Summit—What did you talk
about ?
Mr.Clevirton—Baseball. —[The Epoch.
IIAD DONE PRETTY WEIX.
Millionaire—Honesty, my son, is al
ways the best policy.
His son—Well, may be it is, pa, but
still you've done pretty well.
TNE FIRE MADE HIM LIMP.
First Tramp—Hello! What makes you
limp?
Second Tramp—The result of a fire.
F. T.—A fire?
S. T.—Yes; fired out.—[New York
Journal.
THEY DO NOT SPEAK NOW.
"Well," said Chappie, draining his
glass, "the bottle's empty. It doesn't
take me long to make a quart of cham
pagne look silly."
"That's so," returned Binks. "And it
doesn't take the quart long to reciprocate
the attention, either."—[New York Her
ald.
MORE REMARKABLE.
McCorkle—You seem quite struck
with my idea.
McCraekle—No, not so much with
; the idea as with the fact that you had
one.
" SIMILAR LIKE " IT.
1 "A writer in the Other Monthly claims
that woman has entered every field of in
dustry," said (Jucricus; "still we never
; see nor hear of women watchmakers."
r "There are none," replied Cynicus;
, "probably because so many are engaged
in matchmaking which differs from the
other but in one letter, and is far more
I pleasant and interesting to them."—
■ j [Jewelers' Circular,
QUITE WORTHLESS.
Dryson—l have a fearful cold; what do
you think I had better take for it?
Snarleigh—Oh, nothing; just give it
away.—[New Y'ork Mercury.
t
A PECULIARITY IT nAS.
1 "A bad habit is like a person's hair."
i "How so?"
r "It grows on one."
A Business in Snakes.
The number of deaths from snake-bite
in our great Eastern dependency, and the
difficulty of coping with tlie matter,
have often been commented upon. It
has also been pointed out that many un
recorded deaths in out-of-the-way places
must occur, and thus add to the number
of victims. The Indian Government has
for many years done its best to mitigate
the evil by the offer of a reward for every
poisonous serpent killed. Rut it has
recently been discovered that these
money rewards have brought about a
most unexpected result, a result, too,
which would prove that the natives havo
some of the cunning of the heathen
Chinee in their composition. The Chief
Commissioner of the central provinces
points out that the astute natives of those
parts of the country are beginning to
breed venomous snakes, so that they
may secure the usual price for the rep
tiles' heads. This is decidedly a more
immoral practice than that which is said
to havo been in vogue some time back in
two districts of Australia, in one of which
a reward was payable on product ion of
rabbits' heads, nnd in the neighboring
district on the presentation of the ani
mals' feet. In this case heads and feet
became objects of systematic exchange
between the two districts.—[Chambers'
Journal.
Blonde Hair and Other.
It was announced a little time ago on
high authority that blonde liair was going
out of fashion. The right dye seems to
have been a difficulty, and the difficulty
in some cases seems to have been almost
insurmountable. Those whose taste for
blonde beauty is incurably active will
havo their prejudices so far considered
that mahogany color will be interposed
between dirty yellow nnd the dark brown
or darker brown of the future. There
is a blue-black, which is almost as un
satisfactory as the greeny-yellow. Ou
the whole, it is wisest to wear natural
hair. And so the market has become a
little upset. We shall not get our chief
supplies henceforth from Germany and
Switzerland. The blonde maids of
Deutschland will be allowed to consume
their own crops. Dark beauties are to
have their turn. As a result the Chinese
have suddenly developed a new com
merce. At Marseilles they arc now ship
ping bales of woman's hair sent across
the Pacific. Cathay is supplying the
deficiencies of Europe.—[London News.
History of Electric Lighting.
Electric lighting, says M. Fontaine,
did not make its appearance until near
the close of the year 1873. It was in
Paris, in November, 1873, in the work
shop of M. Gramme, that the first install
ation on a really industrial scale of elec
tric lighting took place by means of a
continuous current dynamo and Serrin
regulators. 7t was also in Paris, in 1877,
that the Jablochkoll candle was first em
ployed; sixteen lights, distributed over a
distance of about 1,100 yards, being sup
plied by asingle alternate current Gramme
hnchinc. Paris, therefore, bad the hon
or of possessing the first public nnd pri
vate lighting produced by means of elec
tric currents. M. Fontaine thinks that
in 1890 or 181 the electric lighting in
Paris will require for its production mo
tive force equal, in round numbers, to
32,000 horse-9powcr.—[Scientific Ameri
can.