SOMEWHAT STRANGE.
ACCIDENTS AND INCIDENTS OP
EVERYDAY LIFE.
Queer Episodes and Thrilling Adven
tures Which Show that Truth is
Stranger than Fiction.
TIIREF. years ago a family named Dell
came to Morristown, Penn., from Ger
many. They were to tell their friends
and neighbors, named Wagner, shortly
after their arrival, whether it would be
advisable for them to come also. Shortly
afterward, and for a long time, the Wag
ners received glowing descriptions of
America and urging them strongly to
come. These letters were ostensiblv
written by the Dells. Finally, they con
cluded to send their daughter Margaret
to verify these reports and help them to
join her. Wheu she arrived at Morris
town she discovered that the Dells—
whom she could not find—had not writ
ten to her family, but that the letters
urging them to come were written by a
rejected lover named Thomas Smith, who
took this means to be revenged on his
obdurate sweetheart. Nothing daunted
the plucky Margaret sought and obtained
employment at a low salary in a family as
servant. Thinking she could earn more by
so doingshe afterward donned male attire,
purchased an outfit and secured work in
Dartzcll's limestone quarry. There she
was known as Nick Deibcrt. No one
suspected her sex. Hut as she would not
join the men in their orgies on pay day
she was eventually suspected of being a
spy and the cause of the discharge of two
men. Fiually, at the end of five mouths,
the men demanded her peremptory dis
missal on that ground.
Margaret, taking in the situation, told ;
her story to Superintendent Ellsworth
and revealed her sex. She resumed her
feminine attire while the men were sent
for and told of their mistake and of the
girl's vicissitudes. Their wrath forth
with changed to sympathy and a purse of
SIOO was presented to her right there and
then. With this and $l5O she had saved
she intends to send for her parents.
A STRANGE account of the travels of a
diamond recently came to light in the
South African diamond fields, says the
Jewellers' Weekly. The authorities,
although they have a record of nearly all
the valuable gems ever found in the
fields, know nothing of the one that is
the subject of this inquiry, except what
has been revenled by the etTorts of the
alleged owner to establish his claim. The
claimant is a seaman ou the Drummond
Custle, one of the fleet of steamships ply
ing between England and the Cape of
Good Hope, lie asserts that in 18811.
while in St. Paul de Loando, he found
* the stone, which he kept as an attractive
Eebblc. lie often showed the stone to
is messmates, but one day missed it un
der circumstances that caused him to
believe that a fellow sailor had stolen it.
Subsequently lie saw an account of a
large diamond alleged to have reached
the Loudon market by indirection. It
was described as chipped and having a
Haw in it, which reminded him of some
of tho peculiarities of his lost pebble.
He was afterward favored with a view of
the diamond, and at once pronounced it
the pebble that had mysteriously been
taken from his possession. The claimant
alleges that the stone was sold by the
thief at Port Elizabeth to a merchant,
who is reported to have realized a fabu
lous sum upon it. The seaman has taken
the necessary steps to establish his title
to the gem, and if his proofs are as con
vincing as his story is remarkable he will
probably recover it. It is unfortunate,
however, that the authorities are in
clined to disbelieve the story of the tar.
THE Manhattan Elevated Railway of
New York City, has just avoided a cur
ious suit for damages by paying a small
sum to the aggrieved person. Not many
weeks ago an old gentleman, with bundles
in- both hands and ticket between his lips,
toiled up the stairs on an elevated rail
way station, and hurrying aloug toward
his train attempted to deposit his ticket
by simply opening his mouth over the
ticket chopper's box and trusting the
rest to gravity. But gravity did its work \
too well, for not only did the ticket fall
in, but along with it fell his false teeth.
The old gentleman, amid the unsym
pathetic grins of the assembled crowd,
set down his bundles and vainly endeav
ored to fish out the teeth. Then an officer
of the station came to his aid with about
wire, but the teeth refused to bite, and
while the old gentleman was looking
around for some bait with which to tempt
his lost property, the impatient ticket
chopper pumped the teeth and sundry
accumulated tickets into the hidden
bowels of his box, and the old gentleman
went on his way in an unpleasant state
of mind. In due timo his complaint in
writing reached headquarters, and now
by the advice of counsel the company has
paid for one set of false teeth.
THERE was recently an 18-year-old
girl visiting in Keokuk, lowa, who is
seven feet and eight and one-half inches
tall and weighs 2112 pounds. Her name
is Ella Ewing, and she is known as tho
Missouri Giantess. She was accompanied
by her father and mother, Mr. and Mrs.
Benjamin Ewing. She was born in
Scotland county, Mo., iu 1872, aud she is
the only child of her parents. Up to the
age of I) Miss Ella was an ordinary child,
but after that she began developing
rapidly and has not yet attained her full
growth.
She has an aversion to publicity,and ab
solutely refuses to be exhibited as a curi
osity. Large sums have been offered her
parents by showmen, but all have been
declined. Some idea of her immcusity
can be obtained from the fact that it
takes twenty yards of cloth, double
width, to make her a dress, while her
mother only requires nine. Her father is
0 feet 1 inch in height, and her mother
only 5 feet 3 inches, and none of her rel
atives on either side has been noted for
unusual size.
THE retirement of the eccentric Coun
tess Sarolta Yay to the quiet of a home
at Pesth recalls the remarkable vagaries
of this titled Hungarian woman. As a
psychological and physiological study
she has few equals. At the age of 21,
brilliant, beautiful and very wealthy, she
donned men's garb and started out on a
career of unexampled deception and
criminal adventure. She devoted much
of her time to making love to women and
during her career married nine different
girls, some of thera belonging to families
pf distinction. Prof. Krafft-Ebing, who
knew her well, furnishes this description
of this very strange woman: "She is a
woman of imposing appearance. She is
of medium height,nud has limbs of mascu
line development. Her shoulders are
heavy, her chest is broad. Iler hair is short,
curly and almost black. Her nose turns
up slight ly and her mouth lias the curves
of Cupid's bow. Although her years of
dissipatiou have cut deep lines in her
face, she is still handsome and looks like
u boy of 21."
THIS story comes all the way from Rus
sia: A lady of Warsaw desiring to marry
advertised the fact in the daily papers
and enumerated the qualifications she re
quired in her suitor. Among them she
mentioned that he must be the owner of
real estate. She received many letters in
reply, but one of them was strikingly
original. The writer said that he pos
sessed all that which the lady desirea in
her future husband. Ife was good-look
ing, he held a respectable position, he
had many friends and was received in
good society, and could support a family
comfortably. As to real estate, ho had
that, too; he was the owner of a plot of
ground in a cemetery which was large
enough to accommodate him, a wife aud
six children. The lady selected the writer
of this letter from the whole number of
suitors. She opined that a young man of
his position who had thought of acquir
ing graves for himself and a large family
before he was married was surely worthy
of the endowment of her heart and
hand.
JonN R. MILLER, a veteran of the
Union Army, took to the National Trib
une office, Washington, recently, a live
land turtle which lie had found in the
woods near Fairfax Seminary, Va., and
which had carved upon its shell the fol
lowing inscription: "1803. H. A. H.
Co. A3. P. R. V. C." After a search
of the records it was found that the only
member of the company and regiment
named huviiig the initials H. A. H. was
Henry A. Harncr, of Reading, Penn. A.
S. Tahar, the chief clerk of Mr. Lemon's
office, wrote Mr. Harncr aud received
a reply showing that he undoubtedly
carved his initials on that turtle's back
twenty-seven years ago. Mr. Harner said
he was a private in Company A, Third
P. R. V. C., Captain Lenhard; that he
marked several turtles while in service in
different parts of Yirgiuia, and that his
company lay at Fairfax Semiuary for a
time and also at Fairfax Court House.
He asked to have the turtle sent on to
him.
A CURIO that has excited considerable
of a sensation iu the fashionable New
York cafes and theatre lobbies is tho
tvatch that is owned by Fred Rullmau,
a well known ticket broker. He has
simply to draw his watch from his pocket
to attract the attention of anyone who
chances to be near. The watch is the
only one of its kind in the city, lie says.
It looks exactly like a round black rub
ber snuffbox. The cases open like any
ordinary watch, but it requires a careful
examination to discover the fact that a
watch with a solid gold case is really en
closed in the snuffbox. Ex
actly why the watch is rigged
up in this singular fashion Sir.
Pullman never clearly explains. He says
it is a protection against being struck by
lightning or stray electricity from the
subways. The watch was a present by a
gentleman who told liim that he needed
such protection.
A NOVEL foot-race came off a few days
ago in Chattanooga, Tenu., the prize be
ing nothing less than the hand of a
mountain maid, Polly Andrews, the belle
of Walden's Ridge. Tom Mitchell aud
John Vanlcet sued for her favor and she
was unable to decide between them.
They being in earnest, proposed a duel,
to which the girl demurred, realizing
that if one were killed and the other a
fugitive, she would lose both. As the
crucial test she decided upon a foot-race
from the Tennessee River to Fairmount,
on the summit of Walden's Ridge, a mat
ter of ten miles, much of it a steep
climb. The men started at 2p. m., and
at 5.10 Vanleet reached the goal, a coun
try post-office. His rival came in a had
second, fifteen minutes later. The
beaten man accepted the situation and
Miss Polly accepted the winner.
A WESTERN journal relates the follow
ing: A few mornings ago Thomas Trees
went down the creek from his father's
house to examine some traps he had set.
While inspecting the traps, he heard his
dogs making an unusual noise some dis
tance below him. On going to the dog he
found hiinlying on the ground and part
ridges sticking out all around his body.
The dog had foundallock, and alighting
in the midst, had pinioned ten; hut when
lie rose up, eight of them escaped, lie
still holding two witli his paws. Thomas
secured the two partridges—tlic others
all escaping. This is an extraordinary
feat for a (log, and only needed a word
from the young man to have secured the
whole of the birds originally captured
by the dog.
TIIE death of Sirs. Susan F. Merrifield,
at Americus, Ga., revives interest iu one
of the most peculiar cases ever known of
a vow of silence made and kept for
thirty years. In 18G0 Mrs. Merrifield
was telling her husband of some occur
rence, when he,iu a testy mood, requested
her to be sileut, as the souud of her voice
was hateful to him. She replied that if
her voice annoyed him he should never
hear it again, and this vow, in spite of
the entreaties of husband, children and
friends, she faithfully kept for thirty
years. Her husband died some years ago
appealing in vain to her to speak to him,
and on her own death-bed she bade adieu
to her children by means of the sigus she
had employed through her long years of
silence.
LAST May a sixty-six pound meteor fell
on the farm of John Goddovel, in Win
nebago County, lowa. Peter Hugland
found it, and sold it to Professor Win
ched. When John heard of this he got
mad and sued Peter for "maliciously and
feloniously abstracting one certain stone
which fell on plaintiff's farm some time
last May, through an act of God, said
stone having probably been hurled from
some other planet in a state of eruption,
and being therefore of great value to the
plaintiff, who wishes by means of it to
acquaint himself with the works of the
Creator." The court couldn't resist this
plea, and the stone was awarded to John.
But Peter has taken the case to the Su
preme Court of lowa, and the end is not
yet.
AN interesting spectacle has recently
been seen in the Orkneys. It is probably
the lirst of its kind ever authenticated in
living memory. A correspondent writes
to a contemporary: "What is said to be a
mermaid has been seen for some weeks,
at stated times, at Southside, Deerncss.
It is about six to seven feet in length,
with a little black head, white neck and
a snow white body and two arms. In
swimming it appears just like a human
being. At times it will come very close
in shore and appear to be sitting on a
sunken rock, and will wave and work its
hands. It has never been seen entirely
out of water. Many persons who doubted
its genuineness now suppose it to be a
deformed seal.
A CASE of extraordinary longevity is
reported by a Mouastir newspaper.
In a village near Elbassan lives a
man named Ismail, who is alleged to be
one hundred and forty years of age. He
has two sons, respectively aged seventy
five and twenty years.
J. IIENNIKERIIEATON, M. P., lias been
traveling in this country to collect in
formation which will assist him in carry
ing into effect a scheme for ocelli penny
i postage, which lie declares he is confi
dent will be established.
The average earnings per year of wage
orkers in Massachusetts is $419.
Untoh Courtship.
In certain parts of Holland, when a
young man thinks he has found his
affinity, it is customary for him to ask
for a match to light his oigar at the door
of the loved one's houao. This little
subterfuge is intended to arouso the
parents of the girl to the fact that some
thing is in the wind. If a second call
with a similar object is madosoon after,
no doubt is loft of the young man's in
tentions, ard the parents proceed to in
vestigate the young man's character aud
antecedents, with a view of ascertaining
his eligibility as a member of the family.
When he calls the third time, always
for a match to light his cigar, they are
prepared to give him au answer.
If his suit is regarded with favor he is
politely requested to stop inside for the
lirst timo, and is served with a light. If
ho is not accepted he is rofnsed a light,
and the door is shut in his faco without
further ceremony. But having prepared
for this contingency, the downcast
suitor will, in all probability, light his
weed with a match from his own box,'
and walk away musing on the transitory
nature of all earthly things. When the
accepted suitor is invited to enter the
house he, as a matter of course, informs
tho parents which of their daughters
has oaptivated his fancy.
When this is settled the young man
steps forward and they join hands.
While tho engagement is by no means
considered a settled foot, evou at this
important stage, yet it is stated as a
truth that wheu ou the occasion of the
young man's third visit his inamorata
Los offered him a second cigar, whioh
be had Biuoked in the house, the en
gagement has never been canceled,
Oklahoma Guide Hook aud Man sent any wiiera
on receipt of 60 oto.Tyler <fr Co., Kansas City, Mo.
Urtlnff a Uin as a uorge,
A fow days siuce some ladies and
gentlemen walking in tho cemetor]
glanced at an adjacent lot and saw i!
young girl hitched to a cultivator, likt
a horse, and driven by an apology of i
man, who, when the poor girl faltered
in the work, would urge her on bj
threats and curses. The facts in thi4
case are in the possession of a certain
gentleman who will make it warm foi
the old scoundrel who uses his helil
like animals. It is enough to make
one's blood curdle to see such people
allowed to do this, and it will bo oui
ploasuro to help protoot any one wh<!
will give tho villain a sound threshing
the next time lie is caught doing any
tliiuar of this kind.— Hudson Joui^na 1 *
If afflicted with sore eyes use Dr. Isoao Thomp
sen's Eve-water. Druuuiots t-oU at26c.per bottla
Senator Hnwioy practices on the violin
very day._
J. C. Simpson. Marquess, W. Va., says:
'Hall's Catarrh Cure cured inc of a very bad
cose of catarrh." DruKfijists soil it, 76c.
Senato Watlo Hninpton, in spite of his cork
leg, is an expert horseman.
Timber, Mineral, Farm Lauds and Ranches
In Missouri, Kansus, Texas and Arkansas,
bought aud sold. Tylor & Co., Kansas City, Mo.
Furmer Camp employs 250 Piute Indians
in picking hops near Foisom, Cal.
FITS stopped free by Da. KLINB'S ORBAT
NERVE RESTORER. NO fits after first day's use.
Marvelous cures. Treatise and 82 trial bjttie
free. Dr. Kline, 931 Arch St., Phila., Pa.
Queen Victoria's family circle now numbers
fifty living descendants.
Woman, har diseases and their treatment.
72 pages, illustrated; price 50c. Sent upon re
coipt of 10c., cost of mailing,etc. Address Pror.
IL 11. Kline, M.D., 931 Arch St.. Phila., Pa.
Pasteur is small and pale, and limps when
ho walks.
Leo Wa's Chinese Headache Cure. Harm
less in effect, quick and positive in action.
Heut pronaid on receipt of $1 per hottle.
Adeler & Co.,s£i Wyandotte Bt., Kansas City,Mo
Russell Sage keeps the firßt dollar ho ever
earned in a glass case.
Tlip saying m clothing where Dobbins's
El.cc tric S<Mip is used, is twenty times the soap
out. it Is no new experiment, but has been
tonrn. Y° AR S. 10-day just AS pur© JUS in
lb(V>. Try it. Your grocer has it or will order it
A reunion of the delegates who nominated
Lincoln is talked of.
Do You Ever Speculate#
Any person sending us their name and ad
dress will reccivo information that will lead
to a fortuno. Ilonl. Lewis Co., Security
Building, Kansas City, Mo.
Fruit crops have been almost a total fail
ure this y< ar.
Guaranteed Ave year eight per oont. First
Mortgages on Kansas City property, interest
payable every six months; principal and inter
est collected when due and remitted without
expense to lender. For sale by J. li. Bauer lei n
& Co.. Kansas City, Mo. Write for particulars
Plymouth, Mich., has three factories turn
ing out toy guns.
Money invosted in choice one hundred dol
lar building lots in suburbsof Kansas City will
pay from five hundred to one thousand per
Cent, tho next few years under our plan. $25
cash and $5 per mouth without interest con
trols a desirable lot. Particulars on application.
J. H. Buuurlein & Co., Kausus City, Mo.
It is likely that Russia will prohibit Chi
nese immigration over her eastern borders.
Its Excellent Qualities
Commend to public approval tho California
liquid fruit remedy Syrup of Figs. It is plow
ing to tho eye, and to tho tasto and by gently
acting on tho kidneys, liver and bowols, It
cleanses the system effectually, thereby pro
moting the health and comfort of all who
uso it.
A Fair Trial
Q# Hood'a Sarfuparina for scrofula, salt rheum or
any affection caused bjr impuro bioo<V la ufiW?U*nt
tp oouvlocu any ooa. of tin suiter lor and peoular
curative powers of this modU. oe. Tho following
statamout Is right to the point:
"My daughter Mary was afflicted with sc* >fulone
ooro nook from the time sho was 23 months old till
aba became 6 years of ago. Lamps formed In her
neck, ami 000 of thorn, aftor growing to tho slzo of
a pigeon's ogg, booamo a running soro for OV<T
tinoo years. Wo gavo her Hood's Horsipartita, when
the lump and all lndlcitims of nenfulu ontlrely
disappairel.' •—J. a Cxauut, Naurlght, N. J.
Hood's Sarsaparilla
SoU by all ilraggUU. .1, rti for Jj. Prnparal only
by 0.1. HOOD & CO., Lowell, MOM.
IOO Doses One Dollar
Nothing On Earth Will
HENS
£
LIKE
Sheridan's Condition Powder!
It Is absolutely pure. Highly concentrated. In
quantity it costs loss than a tenth of a cent n day.
Strictly a medicine. Prevents and cures all diseases.
Sh?.'„ Worth more than gold
vnn hens Moult. 'One large can saved mo fto
send six for $6 to prevent roup," says a customer
If you can't got It sond us fio dents for two packs
five 91. At 1-4 pound can #1.20 post-naid ; cans It
express pnld. "TIIE BEST POULTRY PAPER," sam
ple copy froo. Poultry Raising Guide free with 81
orders or mora L ti. JOHNSON & Co., boston, Uu£t
POWERFUL GUNS. #
How the New War Shipo of Our
Navy are Armed.
From an article on the above by Com
mander C. F. Goodrich, in the Century,
we Quote as follows: "llow very few
persons, by the way, appreciate the la
tent power of a modern projectile when
in motion. Those who have visited the
Atlanta and have seen her smaller guns,
of six inches caliber, whisked about by
one man, will be even the less likely to
realize that their shot can pierce an iron
plate over eight inches thick at the dis
tance of a thousand yards. Try to im
agine for a moment the number of men
who would have to pull on a line that,
arranged in any conceivable way, could
be made to throw the hundred-pound
6hot with force enough to make such a
hole. Yet all of this power is stored up
in a cartridge weighing leas than fifty
pounds. To contain and restrain such a
power, we must, it is evident, use the
best material obtainable; the best at the
beginning, best in the midst of the fir
ing, and best at the close. It must stand
the sudden and heavy first shock; must
yield a little, without rupture or per
manent distortion, when the pressure is
at its greatest; must return to its origi
nal shape when all is over; and it must
offer, at all times, the greatest possible
resistance to fracture. Technically our
metal must be tough, clastic and of
great tensile strength. These qualities
find their highest development in forged
steel. As in guns, so in what they
throw, the tendency is towards larger
masses, more perfect material, greater
destructivcncss. The cannon-ball of our j
grandfathers gave place to the eight
inch and nine-inch shell of our fathers.
To-day we are using elongated steel pro
jectiles—weighing in some cases a ton
each—that will pierce iron armor meas
ured in thickness by the foot, or even
the yard; we arc charging some with
melinite or other frightful explosives
that will create untold havoc, or with
noxious chemicals to suffocate a whole
ship's company.
"Other weapons are experiencing the
lame development. Hotchkiss—an Amer
ican, of course—brought out his revolver
caunon, then his rapid-fire guns. The
largest of these was a six-pounder.
Mounted on a swivel it could be fired
from the shoulder like an old wall piece,
delivering about twelve shots a minute.
Presto! we now hear of 80-pounders, 70-
pounders and 100-poundcrs of this type.
Imagine shoulder practice with a six
inch gun weighing five tons and three
quarters, at the rate of ten rounds in a
minute, each round capable of piercing
fifteen inches of wrought iron! Such
guns exist, and will constitute a large
part of the armament of the most modern
ships of war. Every one is inventing
some new form of mounting to hold the
gun that deals such rapid and powerful
blows, or of brcecli mechanism to lessen
the time taken up in loading. Electrici
ty, steam, hydraulic and pneumatic
power are used in our new ships to load
and handle guns. Maxim—American
again—utilizes the recoil of the piece to
do all the loading and firing.
"The improvements in guns within the
last few years have been so great as to
amount to a revolution, and their con
stant end has been increase in the power
of the gun and in the rapidity of its fire.
In the first direction wo appear to have
reached a limit in the 110-ton gun, and
there is a tcudency to recede, for it is
generally admitted that a smaller gun
will do the work required for naval ser
vice. The largest gun contemplated for
our new battle-ships is the thirtcen-inch
00-ton gun, firing a 1,200-pound shell
with a velocity of 2,100 feet per second.
In tlio second direction we are making
constant progress, but it is mainly by
improvements in gun mountings and in
the service of ammunition. The limit of
the rapid-fire principle is reached when
the ammunition becomes too heavy to be
easily handled by one man, and it is be
lieved that this limi has even been
passed in the English six-inch rapid-fire
gun. For the present, at least, we arc
content with a four-inch gun firing a 30-
pound shell; and a large part of the arma
ment of the ships now building will con
sist of these guns."
A Chalk Mountain.
Last winter the discovery of a huge
mountain of pure chalk in Union county,
Missouri, one mile from the Alexander
county line, three miles from the line of
the Grand Tower and Carbondalc rail
road, and within three miles of the Miss
issippi river, was announced; but until
the past few weeks the magnitude of the
find was not appreciated, inasmuch as the
work of development had not proceeded
to any extent. The mountain isabout 150
feet high, and from borings* thus far
made there does not appear to be any
limit to the chalky substance. The
mountain is the property of Jonathan
I'ecry, whose residence is at Mount
Vcron, 111., and who is just now putting
the chalk on the cars at $5 per ton. The
chalk is found by scratching away about
a foot of the soil, when the pure white
substance is exposed in asolid mass, un
alloyed by any foreign elements, appar
ently as pure as the driven snow. The
discovery is the more imporaut from the
fact that it is said to be the only chalk
bank known in the United States, and
as it is convenient to the railroad and
to the Mississippi river, where it may be
handled in barges, its value is not likely
to be over-estimated. A compnny of
capitalists in this city are investigating
the mine with a view to purchasing the
entire property. —[Commercial Adver
tiser.
Coal Washing.
A coal washing plant has been erected
at a colliery in Yorkshire, Eng. The
plant has a capacity of 400 tons per day,
but lias dealt with 500 tons by the wet
process. The system adopted is carefully
sizing the smudge and automatically
washing and rewasliing after crushing
the various sizes. The plant is driven by
a 100-liorse power steam engine, and the
water used in the process of washing is
circulated by means of a powerful cen
trifugal pump, which, when in full work,
circulates nearly five tons of water per
minute. The object in erecting this
plant was to produce a high-class coke
out of a mixture of very dirty hard and
soft smudge. The coke produced is of
uniform quality, and the ash in the coke
is steadily kept below four per cent.
Besides the preparation of the smudge
for the coke ovens, a quantity of small
peat, suitable for fuel, is produced by
the washer.
The Vitality of the Snail.
The snail is blessed with a very great
power of vitality. A case is recorded of
an Egyptian desert snail, which came to
life on being immersed in warm water,
after it had passed four years glued to a
card in the British Museum. Some spec
imens in the collection of a naturalist re
vived after they had apparently been
dead for fifteen years, and snails frozen
for weeks together in solid blocks of ice
have recovered on being thawed out.
The eggs of this creature are as hard to
destroy as himself. They are perfectly
indifferent to freezing, and have been
known to prove productive after having
been shriveled up in an oven to the sci
bianco of grains of sand.
AN ADVERTISING TRADE.
Perhaps it may have Happened in
Blissville County, Fairyland.
"I would like to have an advertise
ment inserted."
This is a slogan that would resurrect
a dead man behind a newspaper couuter,
and the clerk turned as if moved by an
electric current, and ejaculated:
"\es, sir; want the top of the column,
I s'posc?"
4 'No, I am not particular," said the ad
vertiser.
4 'Want it inside next leading editor
ials?" b
4 'Either page will answer," replied the
other.
4 'Want a cut of a death's-head and
marrow-bones or a sore leg to make it
attractive, or a portrait of the advertiser
with long hair and turned-down shirt
collar?"
"Clear type, black ink and white paper
are good enough for me," was the re
spouse.
4 J All right; want ahead line in type
an inch longer than Jenkins' ad, in next
column, or will you have it put in upside
down or your name in crooked letters like j
forked lightning all over it?"
"No; a plain, straightforward advertise
ment in a space of four inches will answer
my purpose."
4 'Good enough. Want about ten
inches of notice free, don't you? Family
history, how your grandfather blacked
Washington's boots once; mention of
yourself as a member of a circulating li
brary, church, iire company, co-opera
ative store, baseball club and other im
portant public positions?"
The customer said he did not care for
any notice.
"Of course," said the clerk, "you want
a paper sent to each member of the firm;
one for yourself and the privilege of tak
ing half a dozen oil the counter every
week for the next year or two because
you advertise?"
The gentleman expected to pay for his
paper, and asked the price of the adver
tisement.
The delighted clerk figured it up, and
then asked :
4 'lf we send the bill around in about a
year, you can tell the boy when to call
again, can't you?"
"No, I will pay you now," said the
other, taking out a roll of bills.
The newspaper man's eyes bulged as
he said:
"Ah! you want to ask for 75 percent,
discount and 25 per cent. ofT for cash?"
"I am ready to pay a fair price for
value received. Tell me your regular
rates and here is the money."
A beatific expression spread over the !
wan face of the worn clerk, and lie mur
mured :
"Stranger, when did you come down,
and when do you expect the apostles
along?"—[Boston Commercial Bulletin.
Measurements of Criminals.
Experience confirms the belief that M.
Bertillon's system of measuring parts of
the human frame, referred to iu our col
umns some mouths ago, affords a far
more trustworthy means of identifying
criminals than photographic portraiture.
According to Mr. Spearman's article on
"Criminals in France," iu the English
Illustrated Magazine, the French author
ities, with an experience in the measure
ment of nearly one hundred and fifty
thousand subjects, have never yet found
two cases in which all the measurements
were alike. The size and position of
marks and scars, when measured with
the same extreme accuracy, afford a sort
of check upon the bodily measurements.
It is said that exact duplicates of two or
more marks have never been found on i
two individuals. If, therefore, they get
a suspected person whose measurements
and marks prove to be absolutely identi
cal with a record, it becomes certain that
the record refers to him. So convinced ;
are the French officials of this that we
are told that they now trust entirely to '
the figures and never even look at a 1
photograph till they have satisfied them- j
selves of the absolute tallying of the I
anthropometrical description.—[ London
Hews.
Turning the Tables on Vanderbilt.
There is a story of a young man em
ployed on one of the Vanderbilt roads
who, after fruitless endeavors to get his
salary raised, finally went to William 11.
Vanderbilt himself.
lie was kindly received, but when it
came to the question of an increase in i
salary, Mr. Vanderbilt said "Young j
man, the trouble in these days is not that !
men do not get salaries enough, but that |
| they are extravagant and do not keep [
what they get."
With admirable composure the young i
man took a note book and pencil from
his pocket, and, after a little figuring,
said: "Mr. Vanderbilt, as 1 figure it, if
God had given Adam a salary of $25,000
a year, and he had lived till the present
day and hoarded every cent of it during
these 0,000 years, he would still be $50,-
000,000 poorer than you are. Are there
not possibly other ways of getting ahead
besides saving one's salary?"
Mr. Vanderbilt quickly closed the in
terview, but is said to have ordered the
young man's salary raised in recognition
of his cooluess and keeuness.—[Boston i
Globe.
Corn Husk Paper.
It is stated that one of the best util
ized waste products in Australia is that
of corn husks for the production of cloth
and paper. The husks are boiled with
an alkali in tubular boilers, the glutinous
matter being pressed out from the fibre
by hydraulic apparatus, leaving the fibres
in the shape of a mass or chain of longi
tudinal threads, interspersed with a dense
mass of short fibres. The fibre is easily
worked, either alone or in combination
with rags, into the finest writing or
printing papers, and it also very readily
takes any tint or color. If the gluten is
left in the pulp, in the process of manu
facture, the paper can be made extreme
ly transparent.
Tirrc San Francisco Chronicle estimates
that the fruit shipments from California
to the East this year will reach 10,000
carloads, or 200,000,000 pounds. It says:
"At an average price of 5 cents a pound
—which may be considered low, as the
above embraces a vast quantity of dried
fruit, which sells at from 8 to 20 cents a
pound—our surplus for export will bring
the State at least $10,000,000. This is a
pretty good showing for a section in
which apples and pears sold freely at
$1.50 to s:i a pound forty years ago, aud
which at that time was deemed by most
persons unfit for any other purpose than
to dig gold and raise cattle for their hides
aud tallow."
7t? Your .Moulting Ileus.
I Many people get only from five to six
dozen eggs in a year from a hen and lose
money when they ought to get three times
that many and make money rapidly. How?
There are about GOO eggs in the ovaries of a
I hen; get all you can of them in two years,
then kill the hen. You thus save two or
three years' feeding of the hen which is no
small item if you buy all the food.
When a hen is in "condition," says a high
poultry authority "she will lav plenty of
eggs." Therefore help her through the
moulting season that she may !HJ i n condition
to lay during the winter. Thousands of
people have proven Sheridan's Condition
Powder to be worth its weight in gold when
hens ore moulting. It keeps them in health,
, helps form the new plumage, and gets them
in condition to lay early. If you give
them during the moulting Sheridan's Condi
tion Powder daily in extra doses, they will |
get to laving much sooner and will lay all
winter, larger, better, and more vigorous
eggs for hatching than pullets. But don't
keep them a third year; get all the eggs in
two. Remember Sheridan's Powder is not
an egg-food; you can raise or make food as
cheaidy as anyone. To any person interested
I. S. Johnson & Co.,Boston,Mass., on receipt
of name and stamp for reply will send a recipe
for making a good egg-food at small cost.
They are also the only makers of Sheri
dan's Condition Powder. For 50 eta. they
will send two twenty-flve cent packs, live
packs for $1: or for $1.20 pound
can of Powder postpaid; six cans for $5, ex
press prepaid. Sample copy of the best i
poultry magazine sent free. The paper one
vear and a large can of Powder for $1.50.
Children are certain cares and careful com
orta,
Wliat Every llorNcman aud Cattle Owner
Wants.
A Good Reliable Liniment and Condition
Powder.
Such are to bo found In DR. TOBIAS'S VENE
TIAN HORSE LINIMENT, In pint bottles,
aud his DERUY CONDITION POWDERS.
No pay if the LINIMENT and POWDERS aro
not superior to any others. Certificates lmvo
been received from tho late Con. D. MCDAN
IBL and ovor 1000 other horeomea.
If you once give them a trial you will never
i he without tho above mentioned invaluable
articlca Sold by all druggists and saddlers.
Depot 40 Murray st M N. Y.
Breaking down the top of sweet corn as soon
as the ear is formed, but leaving it sufficiently
erect to allow the pollen of the tassel to dust
the silk, has been fonnd by repeated trial to
hasten the growth of tho corn to the eating
point a full week. | 41
SWacobsOil
(pacicAcV^
•"/■"ACHES
FROM PTLY ——
SCOTT'S
Fmulsion
Of Pure Cod Liver Oil with i
Hypophosphites
Of Lime and Soda. 1
l There are emulsions and emulsions, j
l and there is still much sklmmvd milk |
; which masquerades as cream. Try as J
I they ivill many manufacturers cannot j
so disguise their cod liver oil as to make j
it palatable to sensitive stomachs. Seott's l
Emulsion of PURR NORWEGIAN COD j I
LIl ER OIL, combined with Ilypophos- J ;
I phltes is almost as palatable as milk. )
j Par this reason as well as for the fact |
I <>f the stimulating qualities of the Hypo- t
! phosphites, Physicians frequently pre- |
] ( scribe it in cases of
CONSUMPTION, I
SCROFULA, BRONCHITIS and !
CHRONIC COUQUor SEVERE COLD. 1 '
All Druggists sell it, but be sure you get j '
i tho genuine, as there arc poor imitations. ( j
4fl /£& CENTS in stonij* will buy a beautiful
■ large (22x16 1-2 iii<*ln colored picture of
' ■■■ the famous CATSKILL MOUNTAINS,
■HI nnd a handsome catalogue of one liuu
■ll dred picture*.
kg V& J. REDDING,
27 West 22d St., New York.
f
f TON SCALES \ / OF \
S6O BIHSHAMTON
\ Beam Box Tare Beam / v£-. N. Y. k^\
\x. ALL sura , / \/0 Joy
the
p^rciae^for the certalnoare
f el U O. n. INGIIAH AM. M. Oj,
c>tt>o Amsterdam, N. Y.
vri o*l/ by lbs We bavo sold Dig G foi
*of''I
Ohio. P- R. DYCnE k CO..
e> -= >4 h 3b i C * , r! l &
P ™MBM ELY UUOTUEKS, 60 Warren St., New Yort. Price CO -- BHT line]
PILLS
< iW WORTH A GUINEA A BOX. "*® I
For BILIOUS & NERVOUS DISORDERS SH
} Sick Headache, Weak Stomach, Impaired ?
S Digestion, Constipation, Disordered Liver, etc., >
\ ACTING LIKE MAGIC on the vital organs, strengthening the (
c muscular system, and arousing with ihe rosebud of health l
C The Whole Physical Energy of the Human Frame. v
< Beocham's Pills, iaken as directed, will quickly RESTORE (
( FEMALES to complete health. \
S SOLD BY ALLDRUCCISTS. S
S Price, 25 cents per Box. S
/ Prepared only by TEOS. BEECHAM, St. Helene, Lancashire, England. /
) n. F. AI.r.EX CO., Sole Af/rnt* for Fallot Sfnfra, SOS at ,107 Cntml St., lfe )
Torh. who Of ;/"<>
Sbr&nge indeed bft&b
m Obke>eyeryVh injg sob rij&hb, bub
'A needle clothes obhers,&nd isfbselj:
naked' Try ibin yournexbhouse-cleasriin^
What folly it would be to cut grass with a pair of scissors! Yet peo
ple do equally silly things every day. Modern progress has grown up
from the hooked sickle to the swinging scythe and thence to the lawn
mower. So don't use scissors!
But do you use SAPOLIO ? If you don't you are ns much behind the
j age as if you cut grass with a dinner knife. Once there wore no soaps.
Then one soap served all purposes. Now the sensible folks use one soap
j in the toilet, another in the tub, one soap in the stables, and SAI'OLIO
i for all scouring and house-cleaning.
Brimful
of confidence in it—the manu
facturers of Dr. Sage's Ca
tarrh Remedy. It's a faith
that means business, too —it's
backed up by money. This
is what they offer: SSOO re
ward for a case of Catarrh
which they cannot cure. They
mean it. They're willing to
i take the risk—they know their
medicine. By its mild, sooth
ing, cleansing and healing
properties, it produces per
fect and permanent cures of
the worst cases of chronic Ca
tarrh in the Head. It's doing
it every day, where everything
else has failed. No matter
how bad your case, or of how
long standing, you can be
cured. You're sure of that—
or of SSOO. You can't have
both, but you'll have one or
the other,
flENSiONwSh'nilonVS.'a
"Successfully Prosecutes Claims.
Late Principal Ex&miner U.S. Pension Bureau.
3 Train last war. 15 adludicatiuir claims, ottralnofr
ACF.NTN, send for circulars, etc., of new book.
None other like it. Rare opportunity. Address,
Geo.W.France, 7 New Chambers St., New York.
HniiC STUDY. Book-keeping, Business Fornaa
URIC Penmanship, Arithmetic, Short-hand, eta,
thoroughly taught by MAIL. Circular* ft-ea.
rant's College, 457 Main 9L, Buffalo, N. *•
MOTHERS. iaii|
per pacWajce. sent full luMnutlous. Ch>
UU. SNYDER. Lock Box 431. CMcuiro. 111.
Fl nmnfl FARM for sale. .410 per acre, 130
LUniUft acres, 3D cleared and fenced. House,
Stable, Sugar Mill, Evaporator. Fruit Trees. P.O.
and Depot. 11^nillm. w. R. Grant. Snn l'nblo.Fla.
PENSIONSI—H
I plication. Employ the old reliable iirm,
J. 11. CIIALL.K & CO., Washington, D. C.
II I
j Iby wll toatrererV^Pr > n. SCUmMAN,Bt.raol,lßa: |
PENSIONS
I L.II Ul V/11U Foldlers, Widows, Parents, sand
for blank applications and information. PATOICK
I CFABBKLL, Pension Agent. Washington, D. C.
FAT FOLKSHsM
lng, no Inconvenience. Confldeuilal. Oe. for
circulars and testimonials. Address
DR. O. W. F. SNYDER, 2UI State St, Chicago, lib
FRAZER e f?M
BEST IN THE WORLD U lIbMOC
I Oct tho Genuine. Bold Everrwhsre.
BfyTA combihingsAHTlCl.Csi2. K
luid .hipFREE
paid for on dolivory. lU-i j F® I, ' M
loguo. .Vain goods desired. nnmn?*''
Lb RL UU MFG. CO.. 146 sThth aa"pSaua^TM.
BFor Coughs 0 Colds
There Is no Medicine liko
DR. SCHENCK'S
PULMONIC
■SYRUP.
It is pleasant to the taste and
does not contain a particle of
is the Best Cough MMi. ineinthe
I World. For Sale by all Druggists,
Prico, SI .OO per bottle. l)r. Bchenck's Book on
Consumption and its Cure, mailed free. Address
Dr. J. H. Bchenck & Bon, Philadelphia*