j KING OF COUNTERFEITERS.
His Wonderful Ability in "Raising"
Bills and Numerous Escapes.
In tho annuls of Treasury crime there
is no more noted counterfeiter than Pete
McCartney, and his wife has been his
chief assistant. His last arrest was for
raising $1 bills to 50's. He took the "50"
figures from a tobacco stamp, and by
pasting these over the "l's" was able to
make them look for all the world like SSO
\ bills. He passed a number of these, uud
he also raised bills to 20 , 5.' He has
been a counterfeiter all his life, and he
has had a career which would make a
dozen dime novels. He has reformed a
number of times, and his wife, who was
engaged with him in counterfeiting for
a long time, pleaded with him to give
up the business. lie would not do
so, however, and she went in with
him. It was through her that he
often escaped from prison. In 1866,
, when he was in jail at Springfield,
111., she appeared on the scene with
$2,000 in her pocket. A week later
McCartney's cell door was found open
and both he and his wife had disap
peared. It was supposed that the sheriff
had been bribed. After this McCartney
became a photographer, and later on
opened a livery stable at Mattoon, 111.
One day a secret-service agent came to
hire a team and McCartney recognized
him. He made some excuse, and taking
all the money from the cash drawer
skipped out of the back door of the
livery stable aud escaped. At another
time he was running a counterfeit work
shop in an old log cabin in the little town
of Osgood, Ind., and Mrs. McCartney
was helping him. There were two other
women connected with the gang, and
among its members wore Fred Biebusch.
a German capitalist of St. Louis, and
an old man named Levi and his son.
These two latter were determined coun
terfeiters, and the whole Levi fam
ily engaged in counterfeiting. When
the old man died one of the
girls presided over the establishment.
She was robust and handsome, and a
daring manipulator of bogus money.
She was very ladylike, I am told, and her
bright blue ayes gave no evidence of
the secrets which she carried. With
this gang Pete McCartney and his wife
staid for some time, and in 1870 he was
arrested with a lot of bogus mouey on his
person, lie escaped again, and shortly
after this he was again arrested und taken
into the same Spriifglield jail from which
he had escaped. While he was here one
of the chief dectctives of the secret ser
vice called upon him and had an interview
with him. During the interview
McCartney said:
"You don't intend to leave me here, do 1
you?"
"Yes, I do," said the detective.
"Well," replied McCartney, "leanget
out of here easy enough. I have done it
before and can do it again."
At this the detective laughed, but Mc-
Cartney inquired his hotel and room aud
said he would return the call that even
ing. At 10 o'clock that night the de
tective, it is said, heard a quiet rap at
the door. "Come in," he called, and j
McCartney entered. The detective sprang
to his feet and covered his visitor with |
his revolver, but McCartney quietly said:
"I merely called to pay my respects, and
lam going back. You do not need to
shoot me." The greatest caution had to
be exercised in the care of McCartney at
this time, and he was usually searched
after his wife had paid him a visit. At
one timo, after she left, a small bar of
lead was found upon liim, and he would ;
probably have escaped had this not j
been discovered. One of his former es- j
capes he had made by moans of the tin- j
foil which was wrapped around his chew
ing tobacco. He had pressed it into i
shape, and in some way had managed to !
get out by means of it. At another time \
he disguised himself as nu old man. and
a third time he escaped while in the keep-1
ing of two United States marshals.
He was captured in Indiana some years ;
ago and put into the penitentiary, and it
was here that lie had to serve out his sen
tence. His term was fifteen years, but
he got something oIT for good behavior.
During his imprisonment he offered the
marshal $1,700 for a steel saw, but the
official was honest and would not give it
to him. McCartney at one time lectured
on counterfeiting and he acted the part
of tho reformed counterfeiter. He an
nounced that he had abandoned his trade
and was going to be a good boy for the
rest of his lifo. He passed out counter
feit bills to the people who bought his
tickets, however, and lie supplied other
counterfeiters with plates which he en
graved on the sly. lie was a man of
wonderful parts and during his life acted
as an artist, a miner, a livery-stable
keeper, practiced medicine, and acted as
a commercial traveler.
Bismarck's Candid Doctor.
Professor Schwenninger owes his post
as the permanent doctor of Prince Bis
marck to his extremely frank fidelity. He
is n second Abernotliy in the brusqueness
with which he treats his patients. The
great statesman was plagued for years by
is incurable nervous excitement and his
ever-recurriug gout, though it permitted
him to cat well, drink well, work prodi
giously smoke amazingly. No cioctor
could help him until he had the good
fortune to get into the hands of the Ba
varian Proft ssor, the only man, it is said,
who has ever had power enough over
Bismarck to compel nim to obey. At his
first visit Dr. Schwenninger found tho
patient in his gloomiest and most hope
less mood. The physician began to cat
echise the Chansellor about his past life.
"That is no matter of yours," said Bis
marck, "I want you to deal with my
present condition." "If that is the case,"
said the bold Bavarian, "you had better
send for a cattle doctor; he would not be
in the habit of putting questions to his
patients." He took up his hat and made
for the door, but Bismarck, suddenly
laughing in the mids of his groanings,
laid hold of the independent doctor and
said. "I believe, after all, you are my
man." lie has never lost faith in that
doctor from that day till now. —[New
York Telegram.
Feeding a Big Snake.
Three corpulent rabbits of Belgian
breed were cagcd in a soap box quietly
awaiting their fate. They were the meal
r f 4 which the snake was anxiously await
ing, says a writer in the Chicago Inter-
Occtin. He had not tasted meat in four
months and his voracious maw yawned
like a bottomless pit for the unfortunate
trio in the soap box. Manager Bell ap
y peared and drew forth one of the rabbits.
\ After stroking "bunny" on the back for
I a moment he opened the door to the
snake's den and thrust him in. The huge
' |>°a had coiled himself up in a corner, but
p once roused himself for action, lie
1 was fully twelve feet long, and having
recently shed his winter coat, his skin
glistened and shone like satin. He raised
"I* head a foot or so from the floor and
viewed i] ie first course of his quadri-annual
meal. ph e rabbit showed no signs of
fear, but rather seemed to enjoy his new
quarters. The snake slowly lowered his
head and cautiously began to stretch him
self along the side of the den. He never
once took his eyes off the rabbit, which
was still uncousciaus of his danger.
Suddenly the rabbit began to act strange
ly and to cut all sorts of ridiculous ca
pers. lie would leap back and forth
over the snake, and rub up against it.
and appeared to be fascinated. Slowly
and stealthily the snake turned his head
about until it was within a foot of the
rabbit's haunches. Then, quick us a
flash, he darted forward, seized the rab
bit in his mouth, aud in another instant
there was nothing to be seen of the little
animal save the tips of his ears, which
protruded from between the folds of the
snake.
The huge serpent then raised his head
full two feet from the floor, darted out
his forked tongue and hissed horribly at
the motley group watching him. If there
was any struggle on the part of the rab
bit it was not visible. The snake had
him in his awful coils. Then the coils
slowly, but with a strength which was
terrible to look at, began to tighten till
every bone in the poor rabbit's body
must have been broken. This done the
coils relaxed, and the limp, lifeless body
of the sportive rabbit of a few moments
before lay ready to be swallowed. First
the serpent nosed his victim all over.
The eyeballs of the dead rabbit were j
protruding from their sockets, and by '
way of beginning the boa licked them
with his tongue. Once more he coiled
about his victim, leaving its head and
shoulders free. Then he opened his mon
strous jaws and, taking "bunny's" head
therein, began to swallow. Soon the
head and shoulders were out of sight,
and in less than fifteen minutes the hind
legs followed.
Dodges of London Beggars.
The barefoot dodge is a favorite one with
beggars in Loudon. During the Christmas
season I saw one lusty knave take off
his shoes and stockings, leaving them iu
a barroom, aud then pick his way over
the cold cobblestones of the street, sing
ing a melancholy ditty and holding out
his cap pleadingly for pence. Every
English beggar that accosts you reminds
you that he is a "poor" fellow. "Oh,
please give a penny to a poor devil,"
"Please help a poor old man," "Please
remember a poor lad," "Please buy a box
of matches of a poor old woman"—these
are the entreaties which come to you
from every side. The alleged poverty of
these people is their stock in trade.
Then, again, the most hideous monstros
ities are to be met with upon the street
corners—maimed, scarred, and deformed
creatures who seek to profit by their
hideousuess. Many of these creatures
are well-to-do. At the corner of Totten
ham Court road aud Oxford street
sits a woman as fat as butter, com
fortably clad, and wearing a cheerful
expression. A placard suspended from
her neck infhrms the passer-by that
"this poor woman is blind," that
she "is afflicted with fits," and that
she is trying to earn money enough to
pay for being "tapped for the dropsy."
This professional rides to and from her
place of business in a cab. Oxford street
is patrolled by several blind men who
affect dogs and lugubrious songs and
dismal countenances. These fellows
have entered into a sort of business part
nership, and they are rich. Suggest to a
London beggar that he apply for admis
sion to one of the numerous homes or
asylums for the indigent and afflicted,
and see how quick he is to resent the
idea. The street-sweepers are a prosper
ous class, aud an impertinent. A young
lady of my acquaintance (she is now in
Chicago) handed one of these
fellows a penny with the apologetic
explanation that is was all the small
change she had. Seizing the coin the
fellow retorted, insolently: 44 You ought
to be ashamed of yourself for uot haviug
more."
The real cunning beggars are the
gamins who ply their trade in Holborn
and in the city proper. These are the
little chaps who accost you with: "Please
buy a paper, me lord," and, "Let me
help you to a cab, your ladyship." This
shrewd flattery seldom fails of its purpose;
it is particularly effective with Ameri
cans.—[Chicago News.
Hot Summers Long Ago.
A German writer, dealing with certain
prognostications (usually heard at this
time of the year) of great summer heat,
goes back for precedents. In 627, lie
says, the springs were dried up and men
fainted with the heat. In 879 it was im
possible to work in the open fields. In
the year 993 the nuts ou the trees were
"roasted" as if in a baker's oven. In
1000 the rivers in France dried up, and
the stench from the dead fish and other
matter brought a pestilence into the land.
The heat in the year 1014 dried up the
rivers and the brooks in Alsace-Lorraine.
The Rhine was dried up in the year 1132.
In the year 1152 the heat was so great
that eggs could be cooked in the sand.
In 1227 it is recorded that many men and
animals came by their death through the
intense heat. In the year 1303 the waters
of the Rhine and the Danube were par
tially dried up, and people passed over
on foot. The crops were burned up in
the year 1324, and in 1538 the Seine and
the Loire were as dry land. In 1556 a
great drought swept through Europe.
In 1694 iu France and even in Switzer
land the brooks and the ditches were
dried up. Not less hot were the years
1646, 1679 and 1701. In the year 1715,
from the month of March till October, not
a drop of rain fell; the temperature rose
to 38 degrees Reaumur, and in favored
places the fruit trees blossomed a second
time. Extraordinarily hot were the years
1724, 1846, 1756 and 1810, The summer
of 1815 was so hot (the thermometer
standing at 40 degrees Reaumur) that the
places of amusement had to be closed.—
[Loudon News.
Cure for Sea Sickness.
CharlesW. Hamilton, a naval surgeon,
publishes this plan for curing sea sick
ness : The successful treatment of sea sick
ness, which surgeons atioat have so much
to do with, and which generully they are
unable effectively to alleviate, must prove
my eqcuse for bringing before the pro
fession the curative effect of kola. In
the few cases which I have lately had to
deal with I have found the internal ad
ministration of the seed of the kola a
most successful remedy. Half to one
drachm of the seed chewed slowly was
followed, in about forty minutes, by
complete cessation of the various
symptoms of mal de mer; the de
pression, vomiting and giddiness disap
peared; the heart's action was regulated
and strengthened, and a confidence was
felt in heavy weather that my cases never
before experienced during the many
years that they served in the Royal Navy,
and had tried the usual remedies pre
scribed by their advisers. At present no
means ef preventing seasickness in those
susceptible of it is known; aud I venture
to believe that in the kola, or its alkaloid,
we have one, and that a larger trial of
this drug{wil! tend to support my opin
ion. From its well known sustaining
and invigorating properties during
fatigue, for which it is doily used by tho
natiyes ou west coast of Africa and
the Soudan, its action in sea-sickness
seems to be the giving tone to the nervous
system, proving a stimulant—acting gen
erally and locally."—[Detroit Free Press.
Old Advice for New Writers.
Take for your motto: "Whoever can
think and speak well can also write
well."
Make crisp, concise sentences. " Sim
plicity is the first charm of good style."
Iu rewriting cut out all the "fine" or
"flowery" passages.
Use short, every-day words, if they
will clearly express your meaning. Do
not say : "She.attempted to attract the
attention of an assembly of juveniles by
the recital of a small collection of anec
dotes," when you mean that " She tried
to amuse the children by telling them
stories."
Be careful of the arrangement of youi
sentences and the words in them, and
thus avoid ridiculous, and often serious,
mistakes. Do not say, for instance,
"Wanted, an experienced nurse to take
care of a child thirty or forty years of
age."
Cultivate the habit of writing as you
would talk. Call red 44 red," not' 4 ruby;"
speak of "the green fields," not "tho
emerald fields."
Avoid tautology. Do not write: "The
traveler, tired and weary with his jour
ney, lay down to rest."
Avoid redundancy. Do not say: "An
other old veteran has departed."
Avoid the unnecessary use of connect
ives. Only a bad writer would say: "I
went to see her and spend the aftoruoon,
and stay to tea and spend the evening,
and have her go home with me and stay
all night."
In regard to subjects, write of some
thing with which you are familiar, or
with which you cau become familiar by
careful study. For instance, you may
tell of your success with pansies, or read
up the subject "Sponges," to make uu
interesting account for children. It is
said: "A man's best things lie nearest
him." You arc apt to imagine that
nothing less than a trip to the Pacific
coast will furnish suitable material for a
good article. Tho four-leaved clover
grows at your doorstep. Make the most
of your small opportunities while you are
ou the lookout for larger openings.
After selection, plunge at once into
your subject; be sure you strike a keynote
at the outset to which you may return at
the close, and thus secure a complete,
harmonious whole.
Be interested in your topic if you ex
pect to interest others. Become thorough
ly saturated with your subject before put
ting pen to paper. Fully half of the work
may be doue iu the mind before produc
ing visible results. With the subject held
iu mind even desultory reading will dis
close similar ideas that would otherwise
bo unnoted.
Throughout your article show a reserve
strengtji indicating that you could say
more if you would. A study of good
literature will show how this can be done.
An earnest writer anxious to succeed
cannot afford to read trashy literature,
even for recreation. Spend all surplus
moments in the study of noted authors,
and not alone to cultivate style. The so
ciety of cultivated people will also prove
beneficial.
To enlarge your vocabulary look up the
definition of every unfamiliar word you
may chance upon in your reading.
Avoid exuberance in writing. Reinem
ber to be natural.
Have au object iu your essay. Give
the reader fun or information or help in
some way; especially something that is
alive.
Do not attempt too much in one article.
Never appear to preach. Be practical,
even commonplace. There is very little
demand for abstract or flowery literature.
Finally, be brief. Condense, cut out
every superfluous word or sentence.—
Mona Farghar Purdy, in The Writer.
He Owns an Island.
The Colonies and India says: "J, J,
Francis, Q. C., of Hong Kong, can be,
like Defoe's immortal creation, monarch
of all he surveys when he lauds upon the
island of Bulambangan, off the coast of
North Borneo, The island was conceded
to Mr. Francis during a holiday visit
which that gentleman paid to Borneo
last year, and is described .-is being close
upon fifty miles in circumference and ly
ing about ten or eleven miles off the
extreme northern point of Borneo. It is
150 miles from the port of Sandukan,
and has no inhabitants nor any trace of
any. The northern half of the island is a
sandy plain, well suited for pasturing
cattle, or forcocoannt planting. The other
side consists of a dcnsejungleof large trees,
something after the style of the dark
forest which so impeded Mr. Stauley in
his last journey across Africa. The
shore, as is common in the tropics, is
fringed with mangroves. There is an
abundance of fine limestone on the hills,
the highest of which reaches over 400
feet, and in the valleys is soil evidently
very suitable for coffee-planting. There
arc two good harbors. Wild cattle are
apparently abundant, and there are three
species of deer, and plenty of wild pigs,
but no crockedilos. So far Mr. Francis
has formed no definite idea as to what he
shall do with Bulambangan, but he in
tends to send a competent man down to
examine and report upon tho place."
Dudes Who Darken Their Eyebrows.
A strange fad of the young men of the
present day is darkening the eyebrows
and eyelashes. They imagine this pro
cess gives an expression of strength tc
the face which is otherwise lacking, says
the Globe-Democrat. The stuff used foi
the purpose comes iu a tiny box, aud is u
black powder.
In the box is a little kid pencil, simi
lar in form to the stump of a blendei
used by a crayon orpastelle artist. This
tiny kid instrument is dipped iu the
black powder and applied in a dexterous
manner, first to trace the eyebrows
darker and into the desired shape. Aftei
this the eyelashes are touched, and then
a slight line is drawn under the eyes on
the lower lid. At each corner is put the
final touch, a little dash of the dark
powder, which gives a languid look pre
sumed to be captivating
The Royal Palace at Toffa.
The kingdom of Porto Novo on the
West African coast, which has lately been
placed under French protection, will in
time prove to be an important Colonial
possession for the French people. Toffa,
the capital of the kingdom, a city ol
about 20,000 inhabitants, is the com
mercial centre of the surrounding coun
try, and already there are established o
number of French commission houses.
Tho royal palaco is one of the note
worthy buildings, a stone structure, pro
vided with glass windows, which arc
considered a great luxury in these parts.
The inner courtyard is triangular in
shape. It contains the throne of the
king, and serves as the reception-room.—
[Frank Leslie's.
! NOTES AND COMMENTS.
| SAYS an American lady: "V'HL'i in
i Canada recently, I went into a candy,
i store to make a purchase, and, as I had.
always done at home, sampled one of the
varieties piled on the counter. And what
do y®u think I found? Cayenne pepper!
At first I supposed it was some candy
made for April fool's day, hut when I j
sampled two other piles that looked
tempting and from which, had they
pleased me, I should have purchased, I
found that cayenne pepper was in each
piece. 'ln order to stop customers eat
ing candy they don't pay for,' said my
companion. I tell you 1 was mad; and
when I thought of the way in this
country, where one is asked to sample
i everything unknown before buying, I
i told the clerk I didn't want the cara
! mels. I understand some one is trying
i to annex Canada to the United States.
Wall, my unole is a United States Sena
tor, and I shall toll him that unless he
prevents 9uoh a thing I shall go to Europe
and marry a French prinoe. I under
stand that they are cheap now."
ALL New York has nothing mere for
eign than the toa wharves of South street.
Tea oomes in &t these wharves in great
full-rigged ships, and is unloaded for
days by dozens of active men. It comes
out of the holds in the familiar cubical
tea boxes, covered with coarse matting,
and wound about with strips of tough
cane. The matting is lettered iu English,
but evory tenth box is damaged, and the
teamsters refuse to tuke it until it has
been repaired. Two or throe carpenters
are on hand to make repairs, snd to them
the damaged boxes are turned over.
When the English-lettered matting is
stripped off one sfes the queer figures
and gay colors of Oliina or Japan. The
repairing means merely a deft nailing up
of the broken boxes. Each box with its
1 contents weighs about sixty pounds. Of
j this from forty-eight to fifty pounds is
I tea and the remainder packing, which
I includos matting, box and tea load. The
j whole wharf is redolent of tea, and stand
; ing about among the workmen are the
tea importers, their black worsted con
coaled by lo*g, cool, cleau linen dusters,
j THE Siberian Cossack, Dmotree Pjesh
koff, who started November ?th to ride
j from Blagovjechensk, iu Eastern Siberia
i to St. Petersburg, a distance of 5,400
j miles, on the same horse, has successfully
l accomplished his remarkable feat. Cap
j tain Pjeshkoff belongs to a Cossack
; regiment, and his horse is of the rough
I Cossack breed, thirteen years old, light
I gray in color and rather under-sized,
j Neither horse nor rider seems to have
| suffered seriously from the long trip,
| which was attended by no very unusual
i adventures, considering the wild section
|of country traversed. The horse sub
j sisted on oats and hay, and quenched liis
I thirst with snow. It was noted that the
| animal's appetite increased with the
journey, and that he ate nearly three
times as much toward the close of the
trip as he did at the start.
ELECTRICITY is now used to reduce
the dangers of professional target shoot
ing. lu such sport the man who remains
out in the fiold, and with a "brush"
daubed with white paint indicates how
far each shooter has missed the bull's
eye, occupies a post of danger. He has
often been bored through the body with
a shot as accurate as a cowboy's by some
excited amateur who couldn't ordinarily
come within a rod of the target. The
electric target dispenses with his services.
It is so arrangod with batteries and elec
tric wires that the position of each bul
let as it strikes the target is registered
on a similar board at the firing end of
the range. Electricity is invading every
line of human activity.
TIIE law, making it a misdemeanor
for a person to attempt to take his or her
own life, went into effect in Now York
September, 1881. Prior to that time the
average number of suicides in New York
city was 100. It is now at the rate of
215 per year, but the number of unsuc
cessful attempts has fallen off. The law
was not, it should be explained, directed
against those who commit suicide, but
rather against those who attempt suicide
and fail in the endeavor. The average
rate of suicide is higher in Berlin, St.
Petersburg, Psris, and Stockholm than
it is in New York city. It is smaller in
New York than in London, Home, Dub
lin, Madrid, Liverpool, and Naples.
THERE has been a strike of children
employed in the sugar beet fields of Sax
ony. The children near Brachwitz quit
work because their employers refused to
raise their wages from twelve to twenty
five cents per day. In Langenbogen the
children demanded an advance from five
to ten cents per day. All the children
were accustomed to attending school
from 8 o'clock in the morning till noon,
and to working without cessation from 1
to 7 o'clock in the afternoon. They were
compelled to be in the fields, rain or
shine, throughout the six hours.
TiiEcamp-mcetiug seems to flourish in
India. At a recent one held in Chan
dousi, northern India, it is said there
were 2,200 people in camp on the
ground, beside the people who came and
went. On the last day, in the afternoon,
the congregation numbered from 3,000
to 4,000 people, who remained for two
hours while four preachers spoke, beside
the singing. These religious meetings
surpassed anything ever seen in this part
of India beforo. In one day 230 differ
ent persons were forward for prayers.
ILLUSTRATIVE of the growth of the co
operative idea, the Carpenters' Brother
hood of Philadelphia have projected an
extensive co-operation scheme. Theii
plan is said to be an arraugeinent by
which the building trades, including
everything from stone-masons to fres
coers, shall form one grand organization
employing thirty thousand men. This
organization will make contracts, erect
buildings, employ workmen and divide
the profits among themselves.
THE largest railway system in th(
world is in England. The London and
Northwestern Railway Company is cap
italized at $528,000,000, and has an an
nual income of $51,500,000, with ex
penses of $20,500,000 in running and
other expenses. The road employs GO
-000 men on the 2,500 miles of track ope
rated by this system. They have 16,00 C
locomotives, carry annually 57,000,00 C
of passengers and about 30,000,000 tons
of freight.
EDWARD ATKINSON, the famous rnanu
facturer, food-reformer and political
economist, of Boston, is working a new
lead. llis latest idea is the production
of new, cheap and wholesome food from
such cereals as oat and corn-meal, raw
wheat, barley and rye. The material ii
cleaned, steam-cooked and pressed intc
blocks. Out of these he proposes tc
make dishes that will enable a man tc
live well at a cost of a dime a day.
MR. STANLEY snid at the meeting ol j
the London Chamber of Commerce re |
cently, that the director of a Dutch firrr i
called on him, and told him that they
now have thirty steamers on the Uppei
| Congo, in Africa, and that their hous<
j alone had bought $1,500,000 worth 0' I
I ivory in the last two years.
LIGHT AND BRIGHT.
ON the fence—sneak thieves.
NEVER place so much confidence in
your minister as to sleep during the
sermon.
IT must have been a wheelwright
who was first put in as spokesman by
his felloes.
Booos—Stanlev reminds one of a
poker. Fogg—lndeed? Boggs—Yes; a
grate explorer, you know.
"I HAVE never read Shakspeare's
works," said a pretentious woman, "but
I always entertained the highest opin
ion of him as a man."
IN a street car just before 6 o'clock:
He—l am very sorry to crowd you, Miss
DeWitt, but—— Miss DeWitt—Don't
speak of it. There is really no room j
for apology.
"WHAT a nice portmanteau you have, 1
Henry." "Yes t my wife gave it to mo
on my birthday." "Oh! Was there
anything iu it? "Why, yes, the bill for
the portmanteau."
THREE THOUSAND Austrian bakers
aro on the strike for an increase of i
wages. They knead bread, but are
willing to loaf rather than work for
their present pay.
PROFESSOR in psychology—Can't we
conceive of anything as being out of
time, and still occupying space ? Musi- j
cal student (thoughtfully)— Yes, sir; a
bad singer in a ohorus.
How TO elevate the masses is still '
the burden of a good deal of speculation. '
We thought the introduction of ele- j
v a tor a a number of years since had solv- ,
ed that problem for all time.
THREW him in again: Rescuer (who j
has pulled a man out of the water)
—Gracious! Your head is bleeding.
How did you cut it ? Rescued man— |
On the water's edge, I guess.
SHE would like to: He (at midnight) j
—Funny custom the Chinese have.
The hostess is expected to notify the
caller when it is time to go. She (with
a sigh)— Rut we are in America, you
know.
"YOUR papa and mamma know what
is best for you, Tommy," said his
mother. Tommy rolled about a good
deal on the rug and then said: "Ma, do
you know sometimes 1 feel like beiug
an orphan."
"HOLD on, my friend, don't shoot; I
I'm a judge." "Wall, s'posing ye are;
judges ain't no move count dan de law
is nowadays. Ye can't bang a feller,
ye can't 'lectrify liim, and my lawyer
kin appeal's fast as you kin sentence.
Shell out."
AN old negro who had some business
in a lawyer's office was asked if lie
could sign his name. "How is dat,
sail?" "I ask," the lawyer answered,
"if yon can write your name ?" "Well,
no, sail. I never write my name—jes'
dictates it, sail."
MANAGING editor—What's this, Mr.
Scooper? Ten dollars for a magnifying
glass ? I sent you to tho beach to write
up the ladies' bathing dresses —not to
study natural history: Reporter—l
know it, sir; but I had to get tho mag
nifying glass to see the bathing dresses
Early Rising.
Early rising is synonymous in long
life histories with short sleeping, which
means rapid recovery from fatigue, a
sign of bodily strength. These scien- i
titie facts iu no wise contradict the al- j
leged value of early rising as a prac
tice to be cultivated by all persons in
good health. It is excellent as moral
discipline, and eminently healthy as a
matter of fact. Most persons will eat
three meals daily. When a man gets
up late those meals will probably fol- :
low each other at too short intervals to
be wholesome. When he is an early
riser it will probably be otherwise. Ho
can enjoy a good breakfast, and by the
time for his lunch or mid-dav dinner
he will have an honest appetite again.
—British Medical Journal.
A irieu turo tor insomnia.
Every night, at an early bed-time,
take a live-grain pill of asafetida; be
careful to take no strong medicine
after three o'clock in the afternoon;
half an hour before getting into bed
take a hot foot bath. Lot the water bo
as hot as can be borne at first, and add
a little very hot water as it cools. Be
suro to keep well covered up, and to
have the feet in the water for a full
half-hour. A month of this treatment
under tho most adverse ciroumstances
completely cured the insomnia of a
friend, who had run tho entire gamut
of narcotics, stimulants, eating before
retiring, and tiring himself out.—
T.fulinsr TTnm.p. Jru.rrmL
Beeohnm's Tills euro Bilious and Nervous Ills
Tho total Indian population is estimated
to bo loss than 250,000. Of these, 21,282
livo in houses and 9,012 aro engaged in
agriculture. There are 28,008 church mem
bers among them.
.T. S. Parker, Fredonin, N. Y., says: "Shall
not call on you for the SIOO reward, for 1 be
lieve Hull's Catarrh Cure will cure any case of
catarrh. Was very bad." Write him for par.
ticulars. Sold by Druggists, 75c.
A big English manufacturing firm has of
fered a reward to its firemen who save the
most fuel. The firm is convinced improper
tiring is responsible for great waste.
FITS stopped free by Da. KI.INK'S Gnr.Al
NERVE RESTORES. NO Fits after first day'i
use. Marvelous euros. Treatise and trial
bottle free. Dr. Kline, 931 Arch St., ThUa., Ta
In four years the Lutherms have erected
1,582 churches iu this country. Oftheso 880
were Gorman, 847 English, 178 Swedish, 189
Norwegian, 83 Danish. 8 Finnish, 2 Slavo
nian, 3 Icelandic.
Six NnveU Free, will bo sent by Cragin A Co.,
Phlla.. Pa., to any one in U. S. or (.'anada, post
ago paid, ui>on reeelpt Of 25 Dobbins' Electric
Soap wrappers. See list of novels ou circulars
around each bar. Soap for sale by all grocers.
The oldest Baptist church in the South is
the First Baptist Church in Charleston. South
Carolina, tho bicentennial of which was ob
served Nov. 21-25, 1888.
An Only Daughter Cured of Consumption*
When death was hourly expected from ,
CoHHiimi'tl'iii, all remedies having failed and
Dr. Il.James wasexperiraenting, he accidental
ly made a preparation of Indian Hemp, which
cured his only child, and now gives this recipe ,
free on receipt of two stamps to pay expense*.
Hemp also cures night sweats, nausea at the 1
Stomach, and will break a fresh cold in twen
ty-four hours. Address Crnddock V Co., 10ti
ltuco St., Philadelphia, Tu„ naming this paper.
In cases where there has he n excessive vi
bration noticed with engines bolted to beams
or girders of the upper stories of buildings,
hanging heavy weights from the bottom of
the engines has overcome the vibration nl
most entirely. 1- - (i
Oil
" (M fessa^
BALL W'* HURTS,
S SPRAINS,
2 JR BRUISES,
*
A Boston Episode.
This time, Miss Reader, we will not
try a spinner; there are no in
front of the Vendome. Let us take
the more decorous and slower horse
ear. And will you tell me, Miss
Reader, how the ladies behave whom
yon meet in horse-ears in Fort Wron
i gel ? There is rather a curious ob
| nervation made as to the breeding of
Boston women. Just read those lines,
which I received yesterday from one of
the most charming women whom I
have the pleasure of knowing . "My ex
' periences with Boston women to whom j
I have been introduced have been very i
I charming in most oases; but my expe
; rience in shops, cars and streets have
been otherwise, and would till a vol
ume. I have been a stranger in New
| York, San Francisco and Boston, and
j have lived in the three cities. In the j
1 first two I have asked for information, I
and offered small courtesies to total
strangers—women—with the pleasant
est results, in no case meeting with
discourtesy. But in Boston my ex
perience lias taught me never to ask
a question, or try to help a well-:
dressed woman, even when I know her
to belong to 'ono of the best fam- j
; ilies!'"
I have these lines in my pocket, as
you see, and I read them to you be
cause the last time I was on this line
!an interesting thing happened. A \
! young woman, a little over-dressed, if
! you please, stopped the car that she j
| might leave it. She dropped the par
cel that she had been down town to
| buy. I saw it fall and touched her
I and told her that she had dropped
! her parcel. But, unfortunately, I had j
| never been presented to her; we had
i not danced together at Papanti's, nor |
were we members of the same club.
She, therefore, looked at me with the
vigorous manner to which our friend
alludes in the letter, a good deal as it'
i I had struck her in the face, and in
this way expressed her indignation
that any man should have addressed
her who had aot the honor of her ac
i quaintance, I am, however, sixtv
] eight years old. and I stand such
things better than a boy does. So I
I said, very pleasantly, "You have
dropped your parcel, and it is under
your feet." Again she resented the
insult with a look—not with a word,
i observe—and swung out of the car,
1 dragging the parcel after her by lier
dress, so that it fell in the mud in the
street. There the uext horse that
came along trod upon it, I suppose,
and I suppose what is left of it is
there now. lam free to say I think it
| was good enough for her.— Rev. E. F t
i Hale, in the New England Magazine.
Before Marengo.
Boujrienne tell us how the First
Consul, in his Cabinet in Paris, traced
the march to Marengo and laid his
finger on the spot in the map where ho
would fight and defeat the Austrian
army—a prodigy of calculation, if we
recollect the circumstances:
"When he had stationed the enemy's
corps and drawn up the pins with red
heads on the points where ho hoped to
bring his own- troops, he said to me,
•Where do you think I shall beat
Melas ?' 'How the devil do I know ?'
'Why, look here, you fool! Melas is i
at Alessandria with his headquarters. 1
There he will remain until Genoa sur
: renders. He has in Alessandria his
magazines, his hospitals, his artillery,
! and his reserves. Crossing the Alps
here' (pointing to the Great Mont St.
Bernard), T shall fall upon Melas, cut
off his communication with Austria,
and meet him here on the jjlains of
Bolivia'."— Temple Bar.
Health and Strength
Soon replace weakness and languor If that reliable
medicine, Hood's S&rsnpnrllla, is fairly and faithfully
tried. It Ih the best medfeiue to keep the blood pure
and to cxi>el the germs of scrofula, salt rheum aud
other poluoDß which cause so much sulTering, and
sooner or later undermlno tho general health. By
Its peculiar curative power Hood's Sarsaparllla
strengthens the system while it eradicates disease,
i "I think Hood's Sarsaparllla is Just the medicine
for women or anyone who has bad bIood."— JKNNIK
, E. SMITH, East Broad Top, Pa. , (
Hood's Sarsaoarilla
Bold by all druggists. £1; six for $5. Prepared only
by C. I. HOOD & CO., Lowell, Mass.
I OO Doses One Dollar
SOUTHERN IMMIGRATION BUREAU,
Itnleiuh. N. C., furnishes Information about the
South. Maps and pamphlets furnished free of charge.
PENsioNsr;
I are entitled to IS | JI month. Fee gin when vou
RI.£VK,.? 10, L e J\ free. JOSEPH 11.
IIUNTEIt, All y, Washington. 11. C.
. Nfir j EWIS' 98 S LYE
£& L Powdered and Perfumed.
Tho stronnest and purest Lye
. j Will make the beat per
•fumed Hnrcl Soap in 20 min
utes without boiling. It is tin;
vwmi best for disinfecting sinks,
■ fIV closets, drains, washing bottles,
Wig? barrels, paints, otc.
PENNA.SALT M'FO CO.
: ©irt
fliWhe king-
JRjH M"the old proverb be true*
itflOCyftlOKTf SAPOLIO is greyer bhan
royal ly ihsel/*: Try it- i n you r riex h
house-cle&nirtg: Grocers keep ih
DO YOU LIVE IN GREASE?
As a true patriot and citizen you should naturalize yourself
by using the best inventions of the day for removing such a charge
To live in Grease is utterly unnecessary when SAPOLIO is sold
in all the stores, and abolishes grease and dirt.
COLLAR OR CUFF
—————l THAT CAN BE RELIED ON
BE UP -fco emxit; 2
TO '•*!
THE MARK 3>3"Ot tO DlSCOlOg!
BEARS THIS MARK.
NEEDB NO LAUNDERINC. CAN BE WIPED CLEAN IN A MOMENT.
THE ONLY LINEN-LINED WATERPROOF
COLLAR IN THE MARKET.
ONK BJVJOY®
Both the method and results ■when
Syrup of Pigs is taken; it is pleasant
and refilling to the taste, and acts
gently yet promptly on the Kidneys,
Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys
tem effectually, dispels colds, head
aches and fevers and cures habitual
constipation. Syrup of Figs is the
only remedy of its kind ever pro
duced, pleasing to the taste and ac
ceptable to the stomach, prompt In ,
its action and truly beneficial in its
(effects, prepared only from the most
healthy and agreeable substances,
its many excellent qualities com
mend it to all and have made it
the most popular remedy known.
Syrup of Figs is for sale in 500
and $1 bottles by all leading drug
gists. Any reliable druggist who
may not have it on hand will pro
cure it promptly for any one who
wishes to try it- Do not accept
any substitute.
CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO.
SAN FRANCISCO, CAL
teUISVIUF FY NEW YORK, NY.
HOIiBKMKN, I guarantee tostopauy cribbing horsa
Write M, L. ARNOLD, Worcester, Mas*. Box la
f*nillM) HA HIT. Only Certain en#
OPIUM TIWW&SSXLM
PATENTS—PENSIOKStKuM,!^
digest of Pension aud Bounty laws. Send for Itto
Teuton' Guide or How to Get a l'ntent. PATHIOm
O'FAitßßtx. Attorney at Law, Washington, D. C.
FRAZERn^fM
BEST IN TUB WOULD H2 61 E E
C2 y Get tho Geuulno. Sold Everywhere.
DETECTIVES
Urauntn Detective nuren.iCc. ii lrcad(,Clsimtl,£
Be m s i o ssi
Successfully Prosecutes Claims.
,atd Principal KxanPiior U. S Pension Bureau.
fPlso's Remedy for Catarrh 1b the |H
Best, EosleHt to Use, and Cheapest. EH
The Old and Reliable
! DR. TOBIAS'
VENETIAN LINIMENT
IS WHAT YOU NEED,
Because it ACTS LlKl! JIAGIC for PAINS and ACHES
OF ALL DESCRIPTIONS.
"Johu Gill, of the Methodist Home, New York
City, says: \'II my opiiiiou there is notlilug equal to
Dlt. TOBIAS' VENETIAN LINIMENT for pains aud
i aches of every sort; ills the KING. I consider uq
I family or stublo safe without . bottle of your invaK
: uoble remedies.' "
J All Druggists sell it. Price 25 aud 50 ecu is.
DEPOT 40 ItlUllllAY ST. NEW YORK.
WALL PAPER
BARGAINS!
We will guarantee nil these clcuu new goods Just
made, and full length—3 yards to the roll.
An 8-yd. roll White buck Paper, 3 (06;.
An 8-yd. roll (Hit Paper. 5 to 10c.
\n 8-yd. roll Embossed fJllt Paper, Bto I.lc.
(Hit llorder*, 4 to 18 inches wide, 'J and
3c. per yard.
Ilorderff without (.Jit, '4 to 0 Inches lc. per
yn rd.
Send 4c. In stampß for sample® of the best and
great, Bt bargains in the couutry.
F. XX. CADY,
301 II Mill STREET,
Mention this paper. Providence, It. I.
CH ICHESTER'SI ENGLISH
PENNYROYAL PILLS
RED CROSS DIAMOND BRAND
fv'isbje.^Ladlea,
r| Vr dangerous counterfeits. Send 4c.
j& letdles," in Utter, by r<lnra
-T VU*k'uUr~ChJl P C4„ OadUoo Sc..
pSH Mf®*nly Vy iha We have sold Big G for
t/uie*'be" "'of' sat"
Ohio. "S Sl DYCTTF A- CO..
Bold