LONG-.) \WED JOE.
BY OHARLEK S. HLACKBrRN.
<)E was lazy. There
was no denying the
some one else should 1
do the mowing.
Nothing was prettier
in its way, he admit
ted, than green corn
waving in the morn
ing breeze; but the
work necessary to
produce the corn
was not congenial to
his taste. His brother
sped the plow with
out intermission, but
his own team often
stood idle at the end
of a row while lie sat 011 the fence, his
chin in his hands, wishing it were
dinner-time. They called him "Long
jawed Joe" on account of tli© unusual
length of his face. It was also pain
fully thin, but this was relieved by a
clear, wholesome color aud light-blue,
placid eyes. He was good-natured,
and was never known to he angry.
"I tell you now, Joe," said his broth
er, as they were unhitching at noon,
"I'm not goin' ter stan' it 110 longer."
"That's what I've been thinkin'.
Bill," replied Joe; "this work's awful
hard."
"You know what I mean, an' you
can't turn it off that er way."
"What do you mean, Bill?"
"I mean I won't work myself to death
while you loaf half the time."
"Do I loaf half the time?"
"Yes; you know you do."
"That's argument why I should loaf,
Joe."
"How?"
"Well, if I didn't loaf half the time
you'd work yourself to death."
"You're er fool," said Bill, pettishly
lashing his mule witli the plow-lines.
"Maybe I am, Bill, hut I never hit
my mule when I git the worst of an
argument."
"You're too lazy to do anything."
"O, 110 1 ain't. I fixed old man
Braytou's silver bull's-eye last night
when you was asleep, and set it runniu'
right straight along."
"Thar you go ergiu! Because you're
disposed to tinker, pap bought you a
lot of tools that only lio'ps keep your
mind offen your plowin'. He never
bought me nothin' in my life, but he
humors you—because you're lazy, I
reckon."
"I never had my mind on plowin',
Bill, so them watch-makin' tools can't
keep my mind off it. If pap never
bought you notliin', p'rhaps it's because
you never asked him. But if you want
anything five dollars can buy, here's
the money. I made it last week, tink
erin'."
"I don't want your money," said Bill,
knocking his brother's hand away and
scattering the coin over the ground.
"But if you ain't too lazy you can let
down the bars."
Joe picked up the money and let
down the bars; Bill passed through,
down the lane, to the liorse-lot.
"Bill's a good boy," he mused, slowly
putting up the bars, "but he's awful
nigh-tempered. I wonder how a man
feels when he's l ight mad ?" His mule,
kicking at ally, struck his shin. "Look
out, Rliodom, that's my leg you're hit
tin'. There aint much meat on it, hut
what it wants in flesh it makes up in
bone."
When Joe went to his "tinkerin'
room," as Bill called it, that night, his
tools were gone. He said nothing.
Next morning Joe was gone. He left
a lettor, which read :
DEAR BILL: The crop is about laid by. I
leave you live dollars, to pay somobody to
do the rest of my wo k. I wasn't cut out
for a fatmer, but I think I can make a llvin'
tinkerin* watches. Your brother, JOE.
His father looked solemn, hut said
nothing. His mother went into their
bed-room, smoothed down Joe's pillow,
and cried. Bill said :
"He'll come hack when he gets hun
gry ; which won't be more'n a week, at
furthest."
Weeks, months, years passed. The
bluebird built its nest in the hollow
stump; the crow, with one eye on
Bill's gun, helped himself to the early
planting. The June-bug "dodged" the
woodpecker among the tall corn. The
quail made its "mallow" under the
cow-pea vines, and filled its crop with
the ripened grain the coon had thrown
down. The 'possum, grown fat on per
simmons, fell easy prey to hunters
'when frost glistened iu the star-light,
and might have been proud of his ap
pearanco when, garnished with sweet
potatoes, 110 graced the farmer's table.
But Joe came not, nor any tidings of
him.
On a bright spring morning when
the bees wore busy among the honey
suckle blossoms around the door and
Bill was busy in the field, a letter came
to Joe's mother. It said:
DEAR MOTHER: Five yoats seems a lon#
time to mo, and I know it seems a longtime
to you. because you haven't heard from mo
When I loft homo I made up my mind tc
do something for myself buforo I wrote
back. I worn't 110 good in the Held, and as
1 had a knack for watch-tinkorin*. I though!
I'd try it. I uomo to the city, and worked
at it. To make a long story short, for ]
ain't much with the pen, I have done some
thin' for myself. I've got a good business
of my own, and am cumin' to seo you all
But. I ain't comin' alone. I found" in my
travols a littio woman, with brown hair and
black eyes, who says she loves mo if I an;
that rny loan face and long legs don'!
•make no difference to her. She is my wife.
Don't think, now. she can't 000k or keen
house. You mayn't bolievo it, but she can
make almost as good corn-bread as you
can; and, us to cookin' greens down to the
proper seosoniu', you will be surprised
Hhe proposes to prove this by cookin' the
first dinner after we come, 80, if you see
a gawky young man In bad-flttin' city
clothes and a short littio woman in calico
that fits her to a "T" get out of a hack before
the gate, don't think they are strangers;
they will be us. Toll Bill lam yet too lazy
to plow, but knowin' he's not. I've bought
him a splendid mule. Did ho ever find my
tinkerin'tools? Your son, JOE.
When Joo and his wife retired at
night after their first day at the old
home, they found the "tinkerin'
tools" lying 011 the tabic. They were
in a neat box which Bill had bought
for the purpose, and with them was
this note:
Horo they arc, Joo. I'd nsk you to for
give mo if I didn't know you never thought
I did vou wrong when I took 'em. But I
( never thought they'd bring mo a mule in
llvo years. Your brother, BILL.
—Chicago Ledger.
Old Legends Proved True.
It has not infrequently been discov
ered of late that some of the state
ments of anciout writers, which we
have regarded in our fancied wisdom
as too marvellous to he believed, are
nevertheless true. The geographer
Ptolemy; for instance, wrote that the
source of the Nile was in a mountain
range, known as the Mountains of the
Moon, because of the snow upon them.
Modern geographers scoffed at the
idea that" there could Re such lofty
mountains under the equator, but
Stanley, in his now famous "march to
the sea," skirted the foot of a range of
snow-clad mountains, called by him
Ruwenzori, from whose streams is
formed the newly discovered Lake Al
bert Edward, the extremest source of
the Nile.
So Herodotus, the Father of History,
repeatedly asserted that the Ph i-ni
cians thought that they originally came
from tli© Erythraean Sea or Persian
Gulf. This statement modern schol
ars have found very difficult to believe
-—the writers of the article Phoenicia
in the last edition of the Encyclopu dia
Britannica style it "a mere blunder."
An English traveler, however, has very
recently made discoveries in the Hah
rein Islands in the Persian Gulf which
render it almost certain that the great
historian was right,
These islands are a small group ly
ing al)Out twenty miles off the Arabian
coast, aud were formerly of great com
mercial importance. The inhabitants,
besides possessing a pearl fishery
which was noted in the days of Alex
auder the Great, and now produces
the finest pearls in the world, carried
011 an important trade with Arabia and
Persia. This they have almost entirely
lost, but with the construction of the
Euphrates Railway it will doubtlesf
spring up again,
One of the two principal towns lias
a singular water-supply in a spring
which at high water is six feet below
the surface of the sea. "Water if
brought up either by divers who gc
down with skins, or by pushing a hoi
low bamboo down into it. At low tide
there is very little water over it, and
women with large amphoric and goat
skins, which look very real and life
like, though headless, wade out anc
fetch what water they require." Tin
Arabs believe that this and severa
other similar springs on the coast conn
from the Euphrates, which they thin!
flows beneath the Persian Gulf in ar
underground channel, a legend as old
as the days of Pliny.
In the northern part of the largest
island, which is twenty-seven milei
long by ten broad, there is a very re
markalde collection of sepulchra
mounds, covering an area of many
miles. Some of these are elevated
only a few foet above the level of tin
desert. Others are more than forty
feet high, and about four hundred fee!
in circumference. Several of thes
have recently been excavated by Mr
J. Theodore Rent, a well-known Eng
lisli traveler, who has given an account
of his discoveries to the Royal Geo
graphical Society.
Ho says that they consist of tw<
chambers, the one above the other, af
is the case with some Phoenician tombf
just uncovered in ancient Cartharge
In the upper chamber of one which li<
examined were the bones of an animal
presumably a horse, and innumerable
fragments of ivory-boxes, ornaments
bits of small statues. Many of these
fragments were ornamented with pat
terns which bear a close and unmis
takable resemblance to ivories found
in Phoenician tombs on the Mediter
raneau. Our readers will doubtles*
remember that King Solomon got ivory
by means of the ships of Hiram, tin
Phoenician king of Tyre.
The lower chamber was more care
fully constructed than the upper, and
contained human bones together with
the remains of drapery which had been
hung around the walls, another Pine
nician custom. The ivory fragment}
have been deposited in the Eritish
Museum, and one of the officials has
recently publicly said that "as far as
the evidence went at present, he
thought the Museum authorities were
prepared to admit that the Bahrein Isl
ands probably represented a primitive
site of the Phoenician race."
This probable confirmation of the
statement of Herodotus is certainly
more satisfactory than the favorite oc
cupation of some modern writers, the
proving the falsity of stories whicl:
have always boon confidently believec
—such stories, for instance, as that o
the Swiss hero, William Tell.
The Guileless Peddler.
Peddler (respectfully)— Madam, J
have not called for the purpose of try
ing to sell you anything, but to inquire
if there is a man named Jones living ir
this vicinity.
Lady of the house—Mr. Jones livei
next door.
"Thanks. He has a boy about 12
has he not?"
"He has."
"1 think lie is the man I'm looking
for. I was directed a lew moments age
by a friend of his to call upon him. 1
am making my last trip as a traveling
vender of merchandise, and have closed
out all mv juvenile wares except thif
brass-tipped drum with ebony sticks,
which I shall offer to Mr. Jones at such
a figure that—but pardon me. I had
no intention of detaining you. Thaukf
for your kindness, madam. Good day."
"Hold on! What is that drum
worth?"
"It is really worth $5, but I had de
cided to offer it to Mr. Jones for hie
boy at the nominal figure of seventy
fivo cents."
"I'll take it."— Chicago Tribune.
Where the Harm Was.
Mamma Jule- Lookv lieali, Linkum,
doan't ye' nebbah ag in lem me see yo
shinniu' up one ob dem telegram pole?
—mind dat!
Linkum (aged ten) —Why, mammy,
wliar's de ha'm?
Mammy Jule —Ha'm, boy! You
climb up dar en tech one ob dem wiahs
'when hits full ob' 'lectrisitism en yo'4l
Icome walkin' home daid—dars w har d<
dia'in is, my son 1
Hardly a Recommendation.
Tangle—l want a set of false teeth,
Dr. Stumps.
Dr. Stumps (the dentist) —Well, sir,
this is the place to get them. I'm mak
ing the best teeth in the city.
Tangle—Will you guarantee that
they will look natural V
Dr. Stumps—Certainly I will. My
false teeth are so natural that they
fairly ache.— Light.
The Question Is Unanswered.
"You are an authority 011 feats of
strength, I believe," remarked a
stranger to the sporting editor.
The latter bowed and replied:
"What can I do for you?"
"I wish you would tell me which is
the stronger, the female shoplifter or
the vomau who holds up a train?"
MEN often go up to a temptation,
from which they should fly, in a self
confident way; and they often fly when
they should stand and fight.
QUATUEFAOES reckons up at least 1712
races of men, all, however, reducible
to tli© three fundamental black, yellow
and white stems
A LEPER ISLAND.
FACTS ABOUT THE AFFLICTED
OF MOLOKAI.
They Dwell in a Pretty Village
Where Perpetual Summer Reigns
—Origin and Symptoms of the
Disease.
" Such an astonishingly inaccurate im
pression has been spread abroad regard
ing the condition of the lepers on the
island of Molokai," said a gentleman
yesterday who has spent fourteen years
of official life in the Hawaiian group to a
Washington Star reporter, "that it is high
time popular misinformation concerning
them was corrected. The civilized world
at large seems to entertain a notion that
this afflicted colony, lodged upon a bleak
and solitary rock in the midst of the
South Sea, is stretching out its hands
with a despairing appeal to the charity
of other lands for help in its lonely and
uncared-for misery. Within the last few
months advertisement has been made all
over two continents of the intention of
an English nun called Sister Rose-Ger
trude to go out and devote her life to
these hapless outcasts of the far Pacific.
She did go, but is employed at the re
ceiving station for lepers on Hawaii. She
has not been sent to Molokai, and in all
probability will never go there, simply
for the reason that there is no necessity
whatever for her doing so, inasmuch as
there are already at the leper settlement
six Sisters of the Order of St. Francis,
from Syracuse, N. Y., who have been
taking care of the people for half a dozen
years past.
"How do the lepers live?"
"They dwell iu one of the most beauti
ful and fertile valleys of the world, where
the entire year is one perpetual summer,
the temperature varying not perceptibly j
from one season to the other. Their vil
lage is of pretty houses built expressly
for them by the government, and the
meanest pauper leper is provided there
with a comfortable home, good food,
medicines, medical attendance and all
necessaries. Resident in the colony arc
a physician, a member of the Hawaiian !
board of health, and a superintendent to
see that the settlement is as well taken ,
care of as any hospital. Few of the
lepers are without relatives and friends
outside, who send them whatever they
like best, and vessels are constantly'
making trips to Molokai with whole car
goes of all sorts of delicacies and luxu
ries. The village of the stricken is on
the shore of the sea, encircled at the back
by a cliff 3,000 feet in height and so pre
cipitous as to be only passable in one nar
row gorge, which is always guarded Ijy
soldiers. Save for the mortal illness of
the inhabitants one might almost com
pare the place to the happy valley of Ras
selas, out of which there was no escape,
save by one hidden path reserved for
Imlac to discover. The lepers cannot get
away from Molokai, the sea hemming
them in on one side and the mountain 011
the other. Of liberty they are deprived,
but you can perceive that their condition
is very much otherwise than has been
represented, in so far as the material
comforts of life are concerned. The
civilized world at large need not be con
cerned in their behalf; they have all the
care that is necessary or useful."
"Do the lepers suffer pain very
greatly?"
"Hardly at all. At the beginning of
their disease they have severe aches in
their arms and legs, similar to rheumatic
paius, but these disappear after awhile,
and from that point on until death, they
suffer not at all. In many cases this
physical insensibility is the first symptom
of the complaint that shows itself. One
instance I remember of a Honolulu boy
who discovered one day, to his surprise,
that he could approach his wrist so close
to the flame of a candle that his flesh was
scorched, and yet without feeling the
heat a particle. Curious to know the
reason he kept 011 with the experiment
until a frightful burn had been made,
ami yet there was 110 sensation. His
mother took him to a doctor, who at ,
once perceived that leprosy was indi
cated, and the boy was soon after sent to
Molokai, where he now is. The sickness
exhibits itself first ordinarily in a swell
ing of the face, the lines of which be
come drawn and hard; the expression 1
becomes fixed aud the eyes watery, the !
eyelashes and eyebrows dropping out.
Swellings appear 011 various parts of the
body, turning into sores; it is death by
inches, in fact, but painless to the last.
Seven years is the average time from the
first appearance of the disease to the
burial of the patient; there is no such
thing as cure. This is tubercular lep- ,
rosy, and not to be confounded with the
leprosy of the Scriptures."
"How'did it originate on the islands?"
"As to that there is much dispute.
The natives say that it was imported with
the Chinese, but it seems quite certain
that before the coolies were brought to
the Hawaiian group for laborers in 1851
leprosy hud been known there for some
time as the 'chiefs' disease,' because
many of the great men were afflicted with
it. Good authorities are of the opinion
that it was actually introduced by Cap
tain Cook's crew, when that distinguished
explorer visited the island in 175)3. The
primitive conditions under which the
natives lived were singularly favorable to
the propagation of disease. Living aud
sleeping together in one room for a fam
ily, eating their food with tlieir fingers
out of common dishes, and passing
around the same pipe from hand to hand,
contagion had the best possible chance to
operate. In 1793 Captain Cook found
200,000 people on the islands; when the
missionaries went there in 1820 there
were 120,000. Now there are only 45,000
natives left, including half-castes. The
balance of the 85,000 population is com
posed of Chinese, Japanese, Portuguese,
Americans and Europeans. No white
man need be afraid to go to the Hawaiian
Islands on account of the leprosy; there
have not been as many as a dozen white
lepers there in the history of the
country.
Crabs of Chesapeake Bay.
Crisficld, Md., furnishes most of the
crabs all the year around for the markets
of the leading cities of this country. The
crabs are caught in Chesapeake Bay, and
are pueked in crates or barrels for ship
ment. Over half the inhabitants of the
town make their living out of crabbing.
There is a secret about the success of
Crisficld crabbing. The crabber here
never ships a female crab. When one of
the female sex is scooped up in the crab
ber's net it is always thrown back into
the bay. Crabs are caught during evcrv
month in the year and in all stages of de
velopment.
The crabs are dormant from fall until
spring, even in the Gulf of Mexico,
where they are more abundant than any
where else on this country's coast, in
the spring, when they conic out of the
mud and masses of seaweed, they go
right into the business of shedding.
Really, it seems as if the crab had little
else to do in summer but shed his shell
and get a new one of larger caliber. The
hard crab first puts on a leathery under
garment, and while it is growing he Is
known as a "corner." In a day or two,
when this under skin is completed, he is
j a " shed tier," and then he is best fitted
[ for bait, because his hard shell can then
i be stripped off, leaving the leathery in
l tegument entire.
j In a single day the "sliedder" parts
; his shell and becomes a " blister," and in
| a few hours he will throw off his shell,
j crawl out of it entirely and commence to
| swell and stretch out his elastic covering.
Then he is a soft crab par-excellence.
On the night of the day the crab divests
himself of his misfit shell he is in the best
condition for frying. In another day, if
he is not taken from the water, his new
covering becomes like parchment, and in
twelve hours more the parchment hardens
so that it just yields to pressure. Then
he is known as a "buckler," and is of
little use except as a broiler.
The crab fishing business is put down
at half a million dollars per year by the
j Fish Commission, and probably the esti
j mate is by no means complete.
The crabs are caught in summer by
' baiting set lines with tripe or fish and the
I catch per man will average sixty dozen
a day. All the soft crabs taken during
the summer are sent to market and in
May and early June the only soft crabs
to be found in New York come from
Maryland, Virginia and North Carolina.
In the latter part of June soft crabs begin
to be caught in Jersey waters, and the
price then declines. Taking'a crab out
of water arrests the process of develop
ment and packed in sea weed in a cool
place the shedder or soft crab will re
main alive for several weeks without un
dergoing any change.—[New York Mail
and Express.
THE ROOF OF THE WORLD.
Experiences of French Prisoners in
Central Asia.
At a recent meeting of the Paris Geo
graphical Society, Dr. William Capus,
who has been the fellow-traveler of M M. j
Bouvulot and Pepin in their Central Asian |
tours, gave an interesting account of the ;
Pamir, or "the roof of the world." In 1
the course of the lecture he described an
incident which occurred to the French
travelers in Chitral. He said:
"After the Afghans at Barliad had en
deavored in vain to detain us, partly by
persuasion and partly by force, we crossed
the Hindoo Koosh by the Baroghii Pass,
which is only 10,800 feet high. Without
guides, pack-horses, and almost without
food, we reached the Fort of Mastuj,
where the Cliitralis opposed our going
further in the direction of India. While
Bonvalot remained at Mastu j I went with
Pepin to Chitral, the capital of the coun- j
try, situated three or lour days' march to j
the southwest. The King of Mchtar,
named Amman ul Mulk, made us prison
ers the very moment we entered his town,
and he thus explained his action: ' You
wear Russian boots, Russian money, you
speak Russian with your servant and you
come from Russian territory—you must
be Russian spies.' And he caused us to ,
be closely watched, stopped our corres
pondence and sent for instructions to ,
Lord Dufferin, for the English make use
of this chief as a sentinel in the direction
of the Pamir.
"During the long days of our incarcer
ation, when we could only walk 011 the
grass in front of our tent under the eyes
of our guard, we saw the king pass daily
to take part in the much-loved game of
polo, accompanied by a grotesque caval
cade, and placed in the midst of his
courtiers, who surrounded his horse, and
whose heads he made use of to support
himself, us we do a cane. The king has
thirty wives and sixty children, lie is
sixty-five years old. I acquired a great
medical reputation by extracting a wasp
from a boy's ear, and the king sent to
consult me about his favorite wife. She
had broken her leg, but the king would
not let me see it, asserting that the
European tahib, or doctor, had powders
that cured everything. To give him
pleasure, if not his wife, I gave him some
quinine and mercurial ointment."
Range of Modern Rifled Guns.
The distance that modern rifled guns
can cover is approximately one mile for
each inch of calibre. It is generally as
sumed, owing to the navy mounts not
being arranged so as to attain the extreme
ranges, that even the sixty-seven ton
guns of 13.5 inch calibre could not lie
depended upon for a range above ten
miles, and that the range of smaller guns
would be proportionately reduced. It is
said rot only that the deck beams of
ships carrying guns of ten-inch calibre
and upward would not stand the strain
of tiring at extreme elevations, but also
that the guns could not be normally ele
vated more than fifteen degrees, while at
least thirty degrees would be necessary
for the farthest effect. Commander
Folger shows that neither of these objec
tions is well taken. The sixty-seven ton
gun throws a shell weighing 1,250 pounds
and containing a bursting charge of fifty
pounds of powder, enough to destroy
two-thirds of the largest building in the
city if exploded therein. Few people
realize what such a missile is. It is
about as large as the largest hot water
boiler usually attached to the range in a
private house. It is more than a foot in
diameter, and when standing on end it
would come up as high as the average
man's chin. The powder for this class of
guns comes in blocks. The cartridge is
not dissimilar in shape to a bed bolster
and is about as large.—[New York
Herald,
The World's Favorite Food.
Rice is, no doubt, the most extensively
used article of food the world over.
Hundrcns of millions of people subsist
on it, and its consumption is increasing.
It is the principal diet of at least one
third of the human race, forming the
chief food of the native population of
India, China, Japan, Madagascar, many
parts of Africa, and, in fact, of almost
all Eastern nations. The Burmese aud
Siamese are the greatest consumers of it.
A Malay laborer gets through fifty-six
pounds a month; a Burmese and Siamese
forty-six pounds in the same period.
The Eastern nations chiefly obtain their
beverages from rice, which is the prin
cipal grain disiiiied in Si air., Japan and
China. Saki, or rice beer, is produced
in Japan to the extent of 150,000,000
gallons annually. Although rice is such
a universal article of food, it is not as
nourishing as wheat and some other
grains. More than nine-tenths of its
substance consists of starch and water.
Cousequantly it forms more fat than
muscle.—[New York Dispatch.
Lieutenant John P. Finley of the Sic;-
nal Service lias compiled a statement of
the number of tornadoes in this country
for the last 17 vcars. While in 1870
there were only nine, the number has in
creased annually, the year 1886 having
been credited with 280. But since that
time there lias been a gradual decrease in
the number,only 42 having been recorded
in 1889.
MORE OR LESS AMUSING.
KNIGHT of the bath Saturday
night.
HE —I like seats with arms. She-
Bo do I.
t IE love is blind there is no use wast
mg gas 011 it in the parlor.
'DOCTOR, what will remove super
fluous hair?" (Gruffly)—"A razor, sir.'
THE difference between a liar and 0
hypocrite is that the liar is not alwavs
incurable.
TURKEYS are the most innocent ol
birds. The most silly woman in the
world can stuff one.
MCGOGGINS calls his room on the
tenth floor a princely apartment, 011 ac
count of its royal highness.
"HE never had but one genuine case
in his life," said a lawyer of a rival, "and
that was when he prosecuted his
studies."
MR. GRIBBS —So you reject my suit?
Miss Tailor—l do, though pa probably
would not if you sent it to him, as he
said you have not settled for it yet.
SHE —But why is Miss C. wearing
black? He—She is mourning for her
husband. She—Why, she never had a
husband. He—No; that is why she
mourns.
ANGRY Customer—Mr. Cash, I want
you to reprimand that clerk of yours.
He insulted me. Merchant—Sh! Mr.
Credit, I can't. I owe him a month's
salary now.
W EEPING relative (of very sick states
man) —Doctor, is there no hope ? Ex
perienced physician—Only one. We
must induce the newspapers to put liis
obituary in type.
REV. STRAIGHTCUT —Roger, did you
have anything to do with that disrepu
table grab-bag business last evening?
Roger Straightcut—Yes, father; I must
confess that I had a hand in it.
TOMMY (bustling iuto the parlor)—
Say, Mr. Threadbare, what rate ol
interest do pawnbrokers charge ? I
asked father, but he couldn't tell, and
advised mo to come to you.
FIRST Girl—Working now? Second
girl—Yes, I work at Mrs. Lean's board
ing-house, washing dishes. "Do you
have to work hard V" "No, indeed; the
boarders cleau the dishes pretty well at
the table."
OP COURSE SHE IS.
As Peter pat at heaven's gate,
A maiden Bought perinisHion.
And begged of lilm, If not too late,
To give hor free admission.
"What claims liath you to outer hero?"
Ho cried with earnost mien:
"Please, sir," she said, 'twlxt hope and
fear,
"I'm only just sixteen."
"Enough," the hoary guardian said.
And the gato wide open threw ;
"That is the age when every maid
Is girl and angel, too."
Free Prena.
Diamonds in Her Teeth.
About two years ago an article ap
peared in a jewelers' magazine stating
that a New York belle had hired a den- j
tist to sot a diamond tilling in a sound
tooth in order to add a seeming luster i
to her already dazzling teeth. Many
other newspapers took the matter up,
and for a while "diamonds in the
teeth" was a subject of much consider
ation.
The truth of the matter has just
come to light. It appears that hall j
a dozen members of a prominent den- f
tal association had congregated in their
New York club-house, and were dis- I
cussing methods, means, and ways ol
filling teeth. One of the men present ,
was something of a go si in in his pro ; !
fession, and one of the older men do- j
cided to give him a sage stuffing. As i
matters went on and discussions aross
and dropped, the elder man remarked,
with a sly wink to his companions, that
lie had received an extraordinary order
the previous day. In fact, he had filled
a beautiful woman's front teeth with
small diamonds.
Of course his companions expressed
the greatest surprise at this now pro- •
ceeding in dentistry, and the goslin in :
question seemed much impressed with 1
this novel idea.
Shortly afterward the company
broke up, but another question had j
been asked and answered, so the mat*
ter was forgotten long before they lefi
the club. A few days later the perpe J
•trator of the joke was surprised to sod j
an article in one of the
relative to the new fad young women
were adopting, that was "having tiny
diamonds sot in their front teeth
whether the teeth wore perfect or im
perfect."
This was the origin of the "fake,"
and in a short while the new fad was
talked of all over the United States.
The truth has at last leaked out, and
it is now known that no such thing
ever existed. The goslin discussed the
subject with a friend, who in turn re
peated it to a reporter. The lattei
wrote an article on the subject, and
then every one else discussed the mat>
ter and believed it. So much for tin
credulity of the world.— New Yorh
Press,
A 10c. smoko for sc. "Tansill's Punch."
The gas workers went 011 strike at Hamburg,
Germany.
BEEGHAM'B PILLS net like magic on a Weak
Stomach.
An industrial school is to bo started at New
port, It. I.
FITS stopped free by Da. K LINK'S GRKAI
NKRVK RESTORE it. No Fits uftcr lirst day'*
use. Marvelous euros. Treatise and trio]
bottle fioe. Dr. Kline, WU Arch Bt., I'hiTa., Pa
In the old countrio-i cigars are made, by fe
male lain r
Hall's Catarrh Cure is a liquid and is taken
internally, and acts directly upon tlio blood
and mucous surfaces of the system. Send for
testimonials, free. Sold by Druggists, 75c.
F. J. CUENEVAC Co.. Proprs..Toledo. O.
• The railmakors all over tlio count y are
crowded with work.
Six Novel* Free , will bo sent by Cragin & Co.,
Phila., Pa., to anyone in U.S. or Canada, post
age paid, upon receipt of £> Dobbins' Electric
Soap wrappers. See list of novels on circulars
around each bar. Soap for sale by all grocers
The iron and steel makers are comp'aiuing
of low prices. U 22.
What It Costs
Must be carefully considered by tlio great majority
of people before buyiug even what may seem abso
lutely necessary. Hood's SarsaparlUa commends
Itself with special force to the great middle classes,
because It combines positive economy with great
medicinal powor. It is the only medicine of which
can truly bo said
100 Doses One Dollar
Aud a bottle of Hood's narsaparllla taken according
to directions will average to last a month, while
other medicines last but half or quarter as long.
This Is prnctic.il aud conclusive evidence as to Its
Btrcugth and economy. Try Hood's SarsaparlUa and
see for yourself.
Hood's
Sarsaparilla
Sold by all druggists. $1; BIX for $5. Prepared only
by C. I. HOOD A CO., Apothecaries, Lowell, Mass.
100 Doses One Dollar
Shaving the Widows.
Shall the widows be shaved? That
is the great question that is at present
causing agitation among the barbers of
Bombay. To Western ears the subject
pounds a trifle comic, but in the land
bf the Orient it has a very different
and a very serious meaning. In India
it has always been customary to shave
the heads of widows immediately upon
the death of their husbands. Of late
murmurs and protests have been
heard, and the native journals have
been calling for reform. The barbers
have commenced to coincide with these
more enlightened \iews, and it is ex
pected will refuse to perform the re
quired ton so rial operation. '
The Brahmins have threatened that
they will use the scissors themselves,
but this is believed to be impossible,
as it would result in their losing caste !
very important consideration with j
a religious self-respecting Brahmin, j
Up country, says an Indian contempo- i
rary, the practice of shaving the wid
ow's head is not so persistently enforced
as in Bombay. The hair is allowed to \
grow again, and the widow has only to i
submit to a renewal of the unwelcome j
operation when she visits a shrine o!
special sanctity.
In Bombay widows are shaved regu
larly once a week, and this causes them
deep distress. It would really appear
as if the widow in India was regarded
with the same touching affection and
reverential regard as the mother-in-law
in lands that lie more in the direction
of the setting sun,
Fresh strikes are reported from Austria.
ONO ENJOYS
Both the method and results when
Syrup of Figs is taken; it is pleasant '
and refreshing to the taste, and acta
fentlyyet promptly on the Kidneys,
.iver and Bowels, cleanses the sys
tem effectually, dispels colds, head
aches and fevers and cures habitual
constipation. Syrup of Figs is ihe
only remedy of its kind ever pro
duced, pleasing to the taste and ao
ceptable to the stomach, prompt in
Its action and truly beneficial in ita
effects, prepared only from the most
healthy and agreeable
its many excellent qualities com
mend it to all and have made it
the most popular remedy known.
Syrup ot Figs is for sale in 600
and $1 bottles hy all leading drug*
gist*. Any reliable druggist who
may not have it on hand will pro
cure it promptly for any one who
wishes to try it Do not accept
any substitute.
CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO.
SAN FRANCISCO. CAL.
UmULLt. KY IIFW YORK. 11. t.
lly'sCreaißali||§®||
WII.T. CIJUIS J
BKlLDfiENt™"?isj
OF (ATA Kit 11
\p ply Balm into each nostril
-.1.Y 111108.. 5B Warren St., N.Y, v ' r Jq
FRAZERg^fM
BEST iti TUG WOULD UflCHOt
Oet tlio Genuine. Sold Everywhere.
Star Printing, Outfit, 25c.
found not only n source of pecuniary advantage, but
also of great amusement and instruction to the |
i young. Ihe outfit contains three alphabets of rub.
I) r type, one bottle of lest black indelible ink, pullet
for holding type, ink pad. and one pair of type
tweezers. The entire out lit neatly and securely
I packed in a substantial box. with full instructions
for use, will be mailed postpaid to any address.
i Star Printing Outfit by mail, postpaid, '<?."•. 3
forOOr.; O for J* I ; 20 by express S3. Addles
all orders. I'M ON ST.\II WOKKS, .
! I .* Viir.lrw nln-'sirfi-t. New \tu b. 1
W" olei proverb be true*
SAPOLIO is greyer l*hdn
royalty
house-cle&ning: Grocers keep ih
DO YOU LIVE IN GREASE?
As a true patriot and citizen you should naturalize yourself
by using the best inventions of the day for removing such a charge
To live in Grease is utterly unnecessary when SAPOLIO is sold
| in all the stores, and abolishes grease and dirt.
I EVERY WATERPROOF COLLAR OR CUFF
THAT CAN BE RELIED ON
BE UP KTot to Q-ollt 2
THEMARK NQt to>
L— BEARS THIS MARK.
# TRADE
MARK.
NEEDS NO LAUNDERING. CAN BE WIPED CLEAN IN A MOMENT.
THE ONLY LINEN-LINED WATERPROOF
COLLAR IN THE MARKET.
CURES PROMITI.Y AND PI RMANENTLY
I- TT 31 1 i V <r O ,
Rheumatism, Headache, Toothache,
SPRAINS,
Xeuralgia, Sw<■ 11 i 11 K s, Frost-I>ite,
13 ii r r s ks .
THE CHARLES A. VOGELER CO., Baltimore. Hd.
For Fifty Years
the
Standard
Blood-purifier
and
Tonic,
Ayer'sSarsaparilla
has no equal
as a
Spring
Medicine.
, Prepared by
Dr. J. C. Ayer & Co.,
| _ Lowell. Mass.
Anillll HABIT. Only Certain and
llrlllM eHHV CI It Fln the World. Dr.
( VI I Will J. L. STEPHENS. Lebanon,o
DETECTIVES
Qraunan Detective Bureau C'o. it £rcm,CincimU,o
-! o k^S,r?o a r
digest of Pension nud Bounty laws. Send for In
ventors' Guide or How to Get a Patent. PATRICK
O'FARRRLL. Attorney at Law, Washington, D. C.
■ Piso's Remedy for Catarrh Is the H[
Best, Easiest to Use, and Cheapest. ■■
■ Sold by druggists or sent by mall.
30c. E. T. lluzeltine, Wurreu, Pa.
What Every Horseman £ Cattle Owner
A GOOD lIEI.IAHI.r. I.INIIIENT AND
CONDITION I'OVVDEIC.
T>R. TOBIAS'
Venetian Horse Liniment,
In pint bottles, and bis
Derby Condition Powders,
from Iho lace Ooltmol D M. lim.i. l ami ii7,iiim
JfC > "•lI you wIU
Uo\or uo wlthout the RbtiAe-mtMithiiied |ti\'ilii'ilili,
articles. If your druggist or f to, ekeeper dJS nof
keep our goods send to us and we will forward
promptly. Depot, 10 Murray St.. Now York,
ARB THE OLDEST FAMILY BTANDARD*
A Purely Vegetable Compound, without
mercury or other injurious mineral. Safe
and sure always. For sale by all Druggist*.
Full printed directions for using with each
package. Dr. Schenck's new book on Ths
Lungs, Liver and Stomach SENT FREE. Ad
dress Dr. J. H. Schenck & Son. Philadelphia
doree Big ti Ihe onfy
I toTJ^thu'duJaße. 0 ' rta ' DCOr#
not q. U.XNGKAII AM.M. D.,
■ Amsterdam. N. Y.
E9 UTS enlT by th We have sold P.ig G for
01i,.,. flvawi*.! rjt many yearn, and it haa
given the bast of ■atla
vtSk Cincinnati,factloa.
WpA D. K DY('H E A PO.^
81.00. Sold Ly Druggist*.
CHICHESTER'S ENGLISH
PENNYROYAL PILLS
| RED f IA MO D,K W
1/ 'rouV^u n torfelta.^SeD4
I jA "Keller foe Lmdli*," in Ittfr, by return
(*.•?'£'.. BadUoa