Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, December 05, 1889, Image 2

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    A LITERARY SCHEME.
BY DWIGHT BALDWIN.
fWO men w'ero seated
together in a Parisian
It was past mid-dav,
yet the remnants of
dishes upon the table
before them attested
that the meal they had
been discussing was ,
their breakfast.
One, a handsome man j
with a decidedly intellectual face, was
engrossed in the columns of a literary
journal.
The other was rolling a cigarette and
watching his companion with ill-con
cealed impatience.
"What do you see in the stuff you
call literature, Tremaine?" asked the j
latter, at length, yawning wearily.
"Everything, friend Ste. Marie. It
pleases the fancy, refines the taste, j
broadens the understanding."
"But fills neither the pocket nor the
stomach! Look you. now : For the six
months and more that we've been pals
—I beg your pardon, friends—l alone
have contributed to the exchequer."
"That's true."
"I've picked pockets, broken into
houses, robbed shop-keepers, forged
checks, cheated at cards, done every
thing Bhort of murder, in fact; while
you "
"While I've been planning something
respectable. I could never bring my
self to engage in anything so low and
vulgar as stealing."
"But you profit by it," growled Ste.
Marie.
"Yes, to my shame. This wine,
though of a pood old vintage, tastes
like vinegar, when I remember that it's
to be paid for from the hard earnings
of the old concierge you garroted last
night 1"
Tremaine shrugged his shoulders and
pursed up his lips, but at the same
time refilled his glass.
"I have two thousand francs," the
other snapped out. "One of the great
fortunes of which you talk so much
must materialize by the time it's spent
or we dissolve partnership!"
"Agreed! I've just struck the right
scheme!"
"No?"
"It's good for a million, only "
"Only what?"
"It's literary and "
"I don't care if it's religious, so that
it brings money I Out with it!"
"It's right here—that is, the germ is.
Listen!" And in a well-modulated,
cultivated voice, Tremaine read the fol
lowing paragraph:
" 'M. Fortunat, the ex-banker, lias
turned Socialist. Instead of distribut
ing his vast fortune among his fellows,
however, he has written a book ex
pounding the subject. It will soon be
issued from the press of Barreau &
Say. M. Fortunat is a writer of no
mean ability and a treat may be an
ticipated.' "
"How will you accomplish it?" asked
Ste. Marie.
"What?"
"Secure one of the millions he ought
by rights to give away ?"
"Not at all."
"Nonsense! Your literary scheme is
too deep for me."
"I know that, and won't trouble you
with the details. Follow my instruc
tions, intrust me with, the spending oi
your hundred napoleons, and we'll
both he rich before the racing season
opens."
That evening Jean Ste. Marie, dis
guised as a porter, was drinking wine
in a little shop opposite the tall build
ing occupied by Messrs. Barreau & Say
as a publishing house.
Just at dusk lie saw the numerous
employes of the vast establishment
pour into the street.
Soon the wiue-slioj) was thronged
with them.
The disguised Ste. Marie listened to
their conversation, and, selecting one
whom he understood to be employed
in the bindery, called him aside.
Fair speech and a bottle of good
wine set the artisan talking, and the
false porter soon learned that the book
'I'VE JUST STRUCK THK RIGHT BGHLMK"
of M. Fortunat had been printed, but
would not be issued for two weeks or
more.
"The sheets came to the bindery this
evening." said the man in conclusion.
"Couldn't you procure me a set of 1
them?" asked Ste. Marie.
"For what?"
"For a Napoleon—no, I'll make it a
louis d'or."
"Good!" responded the workman.
"The shop isn't closed yet. I'll bring
them now."
That eveniug and half the night was
spent by Tremaine in reading the
work of Si. Jules Fortunat.
But first he wrote, and Ste. Marie
posted, a letter to Henry Diamond, a
wealthy banker of London.
This letter, to which he boldly signed
the name of Jules Fortunat, asked Mr.
Diamond to kindly furnish him with
the amounts deposited in the various
savings banks of London during the
decade just past.
"By an oversight, I omitted it from
the main body of the work," the latter
went on, "and must insert it in the
form of a note. I will be pleased to
give you full credit for the same."
Three days later Tremaine received
the reply at a club, where he hud
asked to have it addressed.
Mr. Diamond not only furnished the
desired information but expressed de
light at having been afforded the op
portunity, and, what pleased the
schemer still more, invited the author
to call upon him when again in Lon
don.
In the meantime Tremaine had sat
for a photograph, after mukiiig himself
up so that even Jean Ste. Mario did
tot recognize lain. i
'Tins the latter took to a skillful en-
I graver, who produced it on steel in the
highest style of art, with the name of
the author, iu the handwriting of the
literary schemer, below it.
Next lie employed a printer to set
up in type a foot-note written from the
points furnished by Mr. Diamond, and
mentioning that gentleman by name.
From Ibis an impression was skill
fully made at the bottom of a half
blank page, upon which a chapter deal- |
ing largely in savings banks con- j
eluded.
Ten days after Tremaine had ob
tained the idea of his "literary scheme"
in the Parisian cafe, he held in his
hands his special copy of the wealthy
socialist's great work.
It contained byway of frontispiece
a handsome portrait of the disguised ;
schemer, and the foot-note upon page ,
430 corresponded in every respect with
the others in the elegantly bound vol
ume.
This was at once forwarded to Mr.
Diamond by express.
It was accompanied by a letter, I
thanking the banker for his kinduess,
and announcing that M. Fortunat
would be in the English capital within
a few days.
On the third day thereafter, Tre
maine, disguised as when he sat for
the photograph, sent in to the office oi
the London banker a card bearing the
name, "M. Jules Fortunat."
That gentleman received his caller
cordially, almost gushingly, and they
were soon lunching together like old
friends.
"I suppose that you now hold your
fortune in trust for your fellow-men ?" i
laughed the hanker when the meal was ■
over.
"Not altogether," responded the
false Fortunat, "but I shall soon ex- j
fufi
ftssr
"GOOD P RESPONDED THE WORKMAN.
pend the bulk of it for the benefit ol
the poor."
"Look out, lest your liberality bring
you to want."
"That's exactly what I came here to
provide against. 1 design to invest o
million francs or more—say fifty thou
sand pounds—in your reliable English
consols."
"An excellent idea. Can I bo oi
any service to you ?"
"Thanks, I think not; a broker has
already secured them on change.
Stay. You may cash my check for
that amount, if you please."
" With pleasure. I might have saved
you, or the poor of Paris, rather, the
commision you will buve to pay your
broker, but it will not amount to a
largo sum."
"Thanks," said Tremaine, as he re
ceived the money in exchange for a
check a few minutes later.
"Circumstantial evidence, the law
yers say, is the very strongest kind,
aud I believe them, else I would not
have cashed so largo a check without a
personal identification."
The banker and swindler laughed
together, shook hands and parted.
Noon of the following day found
Tremaine and Ste. Marie discussing an
excellent breakfast and the "literary
scheme" in the cafe where we found
them, while Henry Diamond was read
ing a telegram from his Paris corre
spondent, and cursing circumstantial
evidence and his own vanity at seeing
his name in a great man's book.
Cornfield Philosophy.
HERE is no
who so
I doctrine
f/Mjwfe.. that hones-
WtM\ JA* 20 is the
Ww&V / V//' k°st policy
V n 1 e s 0
there is a
• proper
amount of pruning done a tree will not
produce much fruit.
It takes rain as well as sunshine to
make corn grow.
If a man is strictly honest there is
little danger of his being swindled by
the misrepresentations of the man
who wants to sell him some countei
feit money.
The hungry man seldom finds fault
witli the dinner.
The deeper the plow goes into tho
soil the harder it will be on the team
that pulls it.
Tho harder it is to go up a hill,
the easier will be the descent. It is
not all up or all down hill in this life.
The fat hog is the one that is turned
into bacon, while the poor ono lias a
perpetual lease of life.
It is harder to pay a debt six months
after it is due, and then it always
seems larger, than when it was con
tracted.
When the hoy wishes lie was old he
is wasting time, as he will but have to
wait to attain what he desires. But
the old man who wishes ho was young
is doubly careless, as the time spent in
wishing makes him still older.
It is not natural that the cat and
dog should live together in peace, and
when they do it is safe to bet that tho
dog is an awful poor one.
The man who lias failed in business
is the same one who put in his spare
time telling his neighbors how to be
successful in theirs.— Chicago Ledger.
THE battle of life has to be fought,
and is unavoidable; but the weaponsii
has to be fought with, the spirit which
is to guide the combatant, the object tc
to bo fought for, and tho kind of vie
tory to be won, these are all to a larg€
extent within the discretion of every
individual soldier.
"I PET ve lief a gutn cupper. I
Bchmells SOUK- ding nice, Johann ; gook
in cabbage?" "No; I lief dropped a
match in my combings basket; dot's vat
yon nohmell."
[CHIEF SITTING BULL.
ACCORDING TO GENERAL C ROOK HE
WAS AN ARRANT COWARD.
Only II Medicine Man. lie Run Away trom
(lie Cutler Eight and Viewed It from 11
Hill—Queer Kxperieuees of the .Sioux
Commissioners.
INC E their ro
■ f xfcurn from the land
of the red man, Gen.
a Crook, Major War
fuA jner and Mr. Fos
tifF-i Jtor, the gentlemen
Vcom posing the
Sioux commission,
lmve had many in
■ ter eating experi-
VA v ' ences to tell of
/W their visit among
\ IAV the Sioux. Asked
about tho prom
inent people among
r -irY* the Indians, espe-
V' ia Hy concerning
JjjL k Sitting Bull, Ma-
"A groat chief
*Ti among the whites,
but a mere medicine man among the In- j
diatis."
"Of course he would not sign the ratifi- 1
cation," said Gen. Crook. "He knew it
would injure his reputation with the old
maids around Boston, who have given him
his fame, to have it go abroad that he had
consented to tho surrender of tho Indian
lands to the government. We made an
etl'ort to bring him over. He is without
influeuce among his own people, and they
knew his stubbornness sprang not from
patriotism. It is odd—the name Sitting
Bull has throughout the world. It arose
from a false account, originated by him
self, of the Custer massacre. He was the
first Indian to bring a report of the affair
to a telegraph sta-
tion, and tbe picture mA
he drew of the mas- MjO J
sacre, with himself JJ , j
; in tho thick of the ! i
; light, scalping ofti
; cers and soldiers j
right and left, made
j sion on tho aforesaid
| old maids. They
: sent him presents,
[ bought his auto- f
graph at stiff prices- UW\l// / I
J for ho had learned at fflj \{ J*/ J
an agency school to
dubbed hsin tho last
groat chief of the BED CLOUD.
Sioux. They had tho entree to enough
magazines and boys' periodicals to spread
Aeir adulation of his character. Ho went
ast and his journey was a triumph. The
truth is that Sitting Bull, wh was only a
medicine man, ran away from the fight
and viowod it from n hill. When the
massacre was complete he descended to the
! battlefield and filled his belt with scalps
torn from tho dead. The real loaders at
tho Custer massacre wore Pod Cloud, who
headed tho Western Indians, and Gall,
who charged at the front of tho Eastern.
Though all Indian fighters know that Sit
ting Bull is a coward, nothing seems to
dislodge him from the esteem of tho old
maids of Boston, and they were still writ
ing for his autograph when we wore at
Standing Rock."
"From what Indians did you encounter
tho strongest opposition?"
"From the rich squaw men among the
Cheyonnos, " said Mr. Foster. "Tho squaw
men are whites who lmve married Indian
women and been adopted into tho tribes.
Under the treaty of 181)3 they are re
garded as Indians, niul their signatures
were as necessary us those of the real
reds.''
"Rich, did you say?"
"Yes, some of them are worth hundreds
of thousands of dollars in cuU'.e, which
range along the Cheyenne river. That is
why they declined to sign. They did not
want their pastures abridgod by the ces
sion of lund t > tho government. The
wealthier squaw men ore old Frenchmen
who went out West as boys with the
American Fur company. Depre, Narcisse
Narcelles, and Claymore on tho Cheyenne
are worth at least SIOO,OOO each.
I "Depro has tho only herd of buffalo
| left in the country. Ho has only twelve,
1 but ho is trying to preserve them as if hi?
hope of returning to Paris when dead de
pended oil it. And he lins n daughter,
half-blooded, of course, who is one of the
most beautiful women I have over seen.
Her form is perfect, possessing tho lithe
ness of her mother's race idealized, her
cheeks are tinted bronze, and her eyes are
deep brown. 1 did not see her mother,
j but was told she was a veritable Poca
| hontns. The daughter is married to
Douglas Carlin, a son of ('en. C'nrlin, and
they live at tho Cheyenne agency.
"Wo had many funny experiences,"
continued Mr. Foster. "We always had
difficulty in getting ourselves understood
in our sot speeches to the Indian councils.
Wo relied on local interpreters—in most
cases Indians who hud been taught our
language nt the agencies—and tho way
they bungled our speeches would have
made a man, proud of his oratory, sick. J
was making a speech at Standing Rock.
'White man lias but little land,' I said in
tho course of an argument to show thai
it was better for each man to own a piert
_ °f land, as among
the whites, than to
n* ' TmA have Bio land held
'W among tho Indiana
Ift. tWx Judge of my feel
ini;s when Mrs. Mc
V W H° WAS FN
mmWt* A I m *''ar with the In
wsAx C^aU * on^ue ' m€
S * ,nt * been rendered
% \ 1 by the interpreter
M 'White man has o
jjCX"** J? Ibudding little lamb.
yV$) /hV / /' r ~ , r But I think tlie diffi
c.ilties experienced
MB. NO FLESH. by the Indians in
mastering our language may bo best illus
trated by a letter, of which I had an exact
copy made, written by the 11-year-old
granddaughter of Rod Cloud to her cousin,
the granddaughter of old No Flesh. It is
tho result o seven years of boarding school
culture, aided by u volume of Crabbe'i
Synonyms, on a promising feminine sav
ugo mind."
This is the letter:
"OGALLA BOARDING SCHOOL, PINK
RIDOK AGENCY, Dakota, June 4, 188!'.
SITTING BIILI,
My Dear Cousin: l am going to drop them
few Hues to let you know I am goiug to
interlineation to you, but I am not going
to informant you many words, we all go
iug to have vacation next three weeks.. I
did not accept your acceptable letter for
long ago but you must excuse mo my
cousin you must intellectually what I says
I am in a hurry to interlineation so I must
interlineation incoinpassionate words so
you must ask your teacher their help
them interrogation and dear cousin two
interrupt mo 1 interlineation this
letter but their do so this 1 inado
black all over that one [a blot] I in
strumentality ask your iustructor I am
going to tell you who I stay with in this
bearding School Miss Julia Hemp &
Florence Hawk them 2 girls I stay with
them in hero. Next time if you send me
one of your picture I will send you one ac
curate ribbon or one of my picture is not
so compassionate to take their picture so
if you accept my indigent letter 1 will ac
cept your letter before the instrument
make us have vacation. Now this all. I
am going to work now bell rang so I must
going go to work I work in lauudry wliis
ask your abodarian, this one meant
teacher that is me Miss Kmily R. Cloud to
her cousin Mabel No Flesh good by & by
write soon I am astonished hurrah.*'
"O d No Flesh, Mabel's grandfather,"
said Major Warner,
"was a big, bony
Indian of iron con- Ml/* A V\
stltution, the stanch-
est courage, and ij/j I . uffl
great influence at
Pine llidge. So re
markably free was
he of any surplus
flesh that the In- lrV fit
dians, whoaronever \ •'
fat, accentuated his V *
peculiarity by the
name they gave OLD MAN AFRAID OF
him. He was in HIS HORSES.
favor of the ratification and gave us
powerful aid. Rut after putting his own
signature to the papers which yielded up
his laud he died."
4 'Are any of the chiefs who wore the
war paint in the bloody forties still
alive?"
j "Scarcely one," said Gen, Crook. 4 'The
Indians have few veterans in the sense of
j old warriors. If they had a pension bureau
; the pensions woull have to be drawn by
their young and middle-aged lighting meu
or left undrawn. The oldest chief of any
note we met was Old Man Afraid of His
Horses, whoso reputation is as much due to
the prowess of his son, Young Mun Afraid
of His Horses, as to his own deeds. Yet
he is but 70 years oid. He makes a ven
erable figure, however, among his people,
and in a council of the chiefs passes for
one who draws his wbdom not alone from
this life. His face, strangely enough for
an Indian's, wears a sorene smile which
seems to bear out the character."
"Did you meet any Indians whose intel
ligence really im
pressed you!'"
"At the Standing
Rock agency," an- Jtt *1
swered Mr. Foster, r^H
I "wo mot a man rflnfit. *V J
whose strong sense
would IMJ conceded
struck us an intel
lectual giant in coin-
parison with other vi rik
Indians. Ho is >i 'ft
known to Iho whites W I
as John Gross and
to the Indians as JOHN GRASS.
Charging Rear, and by reason of his su
perior mind is the most prominent chief
on the reservation. He could not be the
leader he is, however, were ho not known,
to be also brave. His speech in
answer to the proposition wo submitted
his tribe for accession of part of their ter
ritory was by far the ablest wo hoard, and
every chief of any following at all ad
dressed us. I have preserved a shorthand
report ot iho l'nterperter's version of his
speech. It will show that ho understood
the treaty of IbtiH and the recent act of
RED CLOUD'S GRANDDAUGHTER.
Congress until a regard to detail beyond
the giasp of most Indians. His questions
wore pertinent, and his illustration of tho
impression produced on him by the gov
ernment's propo-al to pay $1.55 an acre
for surrendered land which might be set
tled by whites the first year, 75 cents the
second year, and 50 cents thereafter was
particularly good."
She Knew Wlmt Good Victuals Was.
A sclioolma'am tells the following
rich incident. She was teaching a small
school in an adjoining town and "board
ing around." On visiting a " new
place" one Monday noon she seated
herself with the family around a small
pine table and made a meal of brown
bread, fat fried pork and roasted po
tatoes. Just before pushing back from
the table a youngster of ten years ex
claimed :
u l know what good victuals is. Yes,
ma'am—l knows what 'tis."
"Do you, indeed?" exclaimed the
embarrassed schoolma'm, not knowing
what to say and ashamed to say notli
ing.
"Yes, ma'am, I knows what good vic
tuals is. I'se been away from homo
several times, and eaten lots on 'em."
Too Smart for the Place.
"Do you know of a boy who wants a
situation?" asked one dairyman of
another.
"Why, I thought you had a good
hoy."
"Well, he got along pretty well; but
when I told him to go out and feed the
best cow and lie dumped a lot of bran
into the pump I thought it was about
time to lot him go."— Washington
Capital.
Due 14ood Turn Deserves Another.
Fond Wife—lt's so kind of you,
George, to go to the intelligence office
and get a cook for me. You know how
I dread that ordonl.
Husband (thinking of buttonless
shirts and holey stockings)— Well, my
dear, now how are you going to
pay me ?
"Let mo see. % Oh! When you need
a typewriter I'll select one for vou."
THE now artificial silk made of cot
ton or tho sulphited pulp of young
wool treated with nitric acid and then
dissolved in a mixture of other and
alcohol is said to have a density,
breaking strength ana elasticity that
compares very favorably with natural
silk, while surpassing it iu luster.
A SCHOOL OF COOKERY.
TEACHING PUBLIC SCHOOL PUPILS
THE GRACES OF CIVILIZATION.
Prominent Society Ladle* I'liNhlng the
Gow*l Work iu Connection with the
Public School System ~ A Visit to the
School-Room.
§§ HE importance of
good cookery as a
factor in our daily
overo b t i m at e d.
cannot live wUh
alas! how often he
is ob'iged lo sub
sist on food pre.
pared by cooks of
very inferior capa
bilities. The vex.
od "servant girl
question" has
much to do with
this d ep 1 orublo
state of affairs;
still iu many homes
where the wife
herself prepares
;tlie food, much
good material hut
partly fulfills its purpose, owing to ig
norance of preparing certain loods in
such manner as to extract the nutritive
properties. In Boston, cooking is now
included iu tho public school curriculum.
Intelligent ladies, having recognized llie
THE WORK-TABLE.
great need of introducing this branch of
study in the public schools of Chica o,
have organized a public school kitchen,
which, with the exception of the use of
the rooms, is maintained wholly by pri
vate effort. Chicago is one of the first
cities to try the experiment, and
the results will be watched with inter
est. The ladies who are making the ex
periment represent various parts of the
city, and notwithstanding multifarious
social and other duties, they have devoted
timo and money to the inception of this
undertaking, trusting that the public
would perceive its great advantages, and
lliat its adoption in tho schools would
follow as a part of the regular system. A
visit to the Public School Kitchen is a
revelation to those inclined to doubt tho
wisdom of adding further expense to that
already borno by the over-burdened tax
pavers. 'J hat taxes are already too high
for the prosperity of many Western cities
is not to he gainsaid; but cannot cookery,
with its tangible, practical benefit, be
NOTE-BOOKS AND PENCILS.
substitute I for studies only theoretical,
if demonstrated by actual experiment to
bo more beneficial to tho greater clasß of
children who aro students in the public
schools? Two rooms aro occupied by the
scholars. They ore divided by an arch
way, and tho larger room is used for the
kitchen proper, in tho center of the room
is a narrow tablo of pine wood, in the
shape of a hoiseshoe. At regular inter
vals gas jets ore inserted, the wood being
protected by a small piece of zinc around
o ch pipe; oho by u wire screen. The
table oceupos tho greater part of tho
room, nnd, while siniplo and inexpensive,
from its shape is admirably adapted to
the purpose designed, us scholars may
readily pass in and out from the opening.
At tho loft of the room is a Cottage
range; near ly is a di'esser, containing
cups, saucers, plates, etc. There is a
medium-sized pantry off tho kitchen,
FOR CAPS AND APRONS.
where stores are kept. Tho shelves ap
pear so bare in this respect that one is
instinctively reminded of the cupboard
famed in nursery rhyme. It is astonish
ing that demonstration lectures oan be
given with so little material, but is n
great argument in favor of the introduc
tion of the system. Only 15.) HchQlars can
receive tho advantages, fifteen- from
eachdis'rict being allowed one half day.
Applications for membership are constant
ly refused, owing to lack of accommoda
tion.
Tho scholars are neatly attired, their
wool dresses being covered by aorons
and sleeves of white muslin, and they
wear caps adorned with bows of bright
A TEXT-BOOK.
ribbon. From the belt a holder is sus
pended by a tape, and a hand towel is
fastened at tho side. Fersonal clennli
o< bbs insisted upon, l'upils nre not al
lowed to work with so led or lloured
fingers, to tasto with the mixing spoon
without washing it before again used (an
examp'e which might be imitated by many
who pride themselves upon being neat
housekeepers), or to use a baud towel as
a dish towel. In each class of fifteen
there aro three housekeepers, and tho
cooking is done by tho others, in groups
of two or three. Tho kitcheu work is
divided alternately between the house
keepers and the pupils. The kitchen is
ideal in eleauliuess, nnd in marked con
trast to tho room used for that purpose
in many homos, where slatternly servants
roign supreme The horseshoe table is
scoured to perfection, also the meat and
broad boards. Underneath the table are
compartments, where tho outfit of utou-
Bils used by each scholar is kept, consist
ing of a vegetable knife, case knife, two
teaspoons, rolling Ptn, strainer, eto.,
limited lo articles absolutely necessary.
On the occasion of a recent visit to tho
school, the menu consisted of beof tea.
oatmenl mush served with baked apples,
and steamed rice, with boiled custard as
sauce. A small piece of beef, three ap
ples, one-half cup rice, one-half cup oat
meal. one egg. one tablosooon sugar, one
half teaspoon flavoring."and one cup of
milk, sufliced us ingredients iu imparling
to the class a thorough knowledge of
preparing these simple dishes iu a whole
some and appetizing manner. Pupils
are also taught how to build and regulate
a fire.
A diagram of an ox on the blackboard on
the wall was dravm during tho progress
of tho lesson, to illustrate what portion
of the animal fo purchase for various
purposes, in order to derive the greatest
benefit at least cost. The lad.es who
maintain this kitchen are desirous that
tho public Bhall become interested in its
workings, and they extend an invitation
lo all ladies and gentlemen to visit tho
school and see the children at their les
sons.— Chicago Ledger.
Adventure witn t nioroimm.
Writers of stories of adventure who
have been casting about for novelties
iu this line have somehow overlooked
the possibilities which lurk in the do
main of drugs. With proper treatment
rhubarb may be found more effective
than train-robbers, and ipecac may fur
nish a substitute for tho cyclone.
Mr. Tromholt relates an adventure
which he met with at the Norwegian
town of Bossekop, and which may
prove suggestive:
The doctor had, on parting, present
ed me with a bottle of chloroform as a
preventive against Rea-sickuess, which
I had in the pocket of my coat, hut
forgot all about. When leaving the
residence of the magistrate, I jumped
into the trap, and at tho same moment
heard something crash beneath me,
and, driving along the road, felt a pe
culiar, cooling sensation by my side,
which seemed to proceed from the cush
ion on which I was sitting.
In an instant the situation flashed
upon me. I was sitting On a quantity
of chloroform large enough to kill an
army.
Not a moment was to be lost, and re
alizing the danger of taking my coat
off and exposing myself to the whole
fori* of the narcotic, I gave the horse
the reins and began to belabor him
with the whip, in order, if possible, to
reach the station before I became in
sensiblo.
Whack! whack! whack! Faster and
faster gallops the horse; a siekly odor
ascends to my nostrils; a kind of mist
seenis to gather before my eyes. At
that moment, the Elation conivo into
view. A strong effort on my part, and
more exertions of the horse. In the
next minute we fly into the yard of
the station as if pursued by a host of
savages.
The people, on hearing the terrific
rattle of wheels, have come outside,
and to them the writer presents the
spectacle of an apparently semi-intoxi
eatod man flinging himself out of a
trap, tearing off his great-coat, and
throwing it as far away as his strength
would permit. No wonder they thought
T had gone raving mad.
Itriiiily iu Tears.
Men are weak, sometimes—especially
if so unfortunate as to have viragos for
wives. They dread the storm, and
agree to almost anything to avoid it.
Then, too, a man dislikes to see a
woman's tears—especially if he be in
any way concerned in calling them
forth. They appeal most strongly to
the softer feelings of his nature; they
are a tacit acknowledgment of his
power, by which he is both flattered
and grieved, and, unless his heart be
harder than adamant, or he has be
come indifferent to such scenes from
their frequency, he will make any sac
rifice, yield any point, even though
his conscience whispers that he is do
ing wrong. Having entered upon this
snbject, let me breathe a few words in
the oars of those ladies who are iu the
habit of a constant resort to this
timely weapon of self-offense and de
fense. I would warn them that toe
frequent use will blunt its edge. Men
grow weary of sameness, and even
beauty in tears will, after a time,
cease to be interesting.— St. Louit
Magazine. _____
It Netted Him Fire Dollars.
The boys of the fire department are
laughing over a break made by one of
their number during a recent fire about
a West End saloon. The proprietor
was, of course, almost frautio at tho
threatened loss of his property, and
rushed about as though ho was on al
hot stove. While the engines were
playing upon the fire, he suddenly re
membered the slate which contained
the accounts, and yelled for the hoys
to stop while he went for the article.
Tho young man who was manipulating
the hose happened to he a customer of
the saioonist. When the man and his
slate appeared in the doorway, the fire
man took in the sitnntion at" a glance.
A well-directed stream of water hit
that slate squarely between the eyes,
so to speak, and nothing was left but
the frame in the proprietor's hand to
tell the story of many a good dollar
squandered for booze. The fireman
who did the act looked around with a
grin as he observed: "Bovs, I'm about
$5 better off than I was this morning."
—Cincinnati Times.
THE frigate bird of Africa is the swift
est of winged creatures—so rapid that
sailors believe it can start from
home in the morning and alight in
America on the evening of the same
day, thus crossing the Atlantic iu about
eleven hours. Enlightened observers,
however, place the speed at one hun
dred miles an hour.
IT is asserted that no flowering plant
w as ever found growing within the Ant
arctic Circle. But there are 732 differ
ent kinds in the Arctic Circle, fifty of
which are confined to that region. The
colors are chiefly white and yellow.
IT has been satisfactorily demon
strated that the arsenates are effective
against the codling moth; that in their
use there is no danger to the fruit of
the tree upon which they are used. |
THE SCARF-PIN.
It llus Always Boon a SuftVror Owing: to
Alan's Ignorance of Its duo.
r - 1 HE scarf-pin has al-
p —l ways been a suf-
L_J I fever owing to man's
ignorance of its use.
VgJJ In the first place,
the pin is not for
/ v T)£\ ornament; it has a
L l ifiOp >\ specific and inipor
flf&v/ taut duty to per
\' y JT "T form, and that is tho
\] | 1 holding together of
'iiuLLq I Now in flats, puffs
"f . I and scarfs which are
* * made in imitation of
a tied-by-wearer scarf the pin should
always be in the place that it would
occupy in the original, says the Haber
dasher; for that reason the pin in a puff
or flat should be where it would be iu
an Ascott or a J)e .Toinville.
Placing the pin in a corner is a new
fad and a senseless
one, while the plac
ing of a pin in tho
center of tho scarf x aXwA
is an old abuse of vh I
such long standing \ \ J
that it is too late to \ I /
take hold of the A Y
matter with much / \ I
hope of success. / \ \
Nevertheless, for / \ \
the benefit of our / \ \
readers, we give A \
three illustrations; rVrrTc K
one shows the new ® E In
fad, the other shows the wrong way,
and the third the correct way. Now,
it is not and never lias been looked
upon as good taste to see a man with a
pin in a Teck.
Tho Teck lias absolutely no use for
a pin, unless, of course, it was bought
-v by tho wearer for
(/■y 1 the express pur-
P ose serving the
/ ends of an exliibit-
I f J or of jewelry and
\ / f bud taste at the
\J / same time. As re
/ A gards wearing a pin
/ / \ in a four-in-hand,
/ / \ there is some ex
/ / \ ouse for it. This
/ / \ knot lias a bad hab-
sEppping, and
Tur ftin w7* a small, neat pinto
WW hold it in place is
not in bad taste, but sensible action.
Young men have for the last season
worn small gold or silver pins to keep
the full-dress tie in /tf r— — —iiiilTV
place; now this is /fljjh!"
actuated by princi- /
pies of the right /T \ j V
sort, but many have ( V,. \] ""*** y
taken this means to \ J
display pearl and \ /
even jeweled gold \ / /
pins. The latter is \/ /
not in form. V /
These pins, if / J\
used at all, should / / \
be small as possiblo / / \
and hidden as much
from sight as prao- THE CORRECT W
ticable.
This winter will call for larger pins
than heretofore; this is owing to the
growth of the big puffs and fiats, but
we would not be surprised to see some
of these gigantic puff-pins cosily nest
ling among tho snowy-wliite folds of
the full-dress bow, put there by one of
our much too many bad dressers and
morbid jewelry exhibitors.
BANGS STILL IN FASHION.
Thy Havo Boon Here Kiglitoen Years
—The Lutoat Fa<l in the Style.
f./|HERE is prob-
Sf~lable no fashion
-1 or fancy that has
> taken so firm a
$ hold on tho fem
| L inine portion of
"\t he population
yas tho bang,
which is now
celebrating tho
eighteenth year
of its reign. In
the face of ridi
cule and criti
"l\ \\ /A eism it has held
K \\ y \ its own since
\ \ Ayb 1871, when in
I |\"j yv, some inexplica
-1 'V/ manner it
I hrade hs appear
-1 anoe u P°n cer-
I 1 f y W* tain fashionable
— EST brows. In a
short time all classes had adopted tho
white fringe, as it was then styled by
tho newspapers. Tho general adapta
bility to almost any type of face ac
counts for its popularity, and although
decried and caricatured, it has never
lost its hold upon tho feminine heart.
First came the severely straight fringe
across the forehead, becoming to so 1
few maidens. Then the curled hang
was introduced, not to take its place,
hut to share its popularity. Montague
hangs came next with their sugges
tion of soap, water, and bando
line. Then tho "Langtry,"introduced
by the Jersey Lily, necessitated a sac
rifice of all the long locks on tho crown
of the head, whereas heretofore only a
short fringe had been worn on the
forehead. Tho Russian bangs, short
and sharp-pointed, vied with the sau
cer-shaped, until Mrs. Cleveland
changed the entire complexion of
events by wearing the pompadour
bang, made so popular by tho first of
her photographs which were sent
broadcast over the land. Girls with
broad, clear foreheads at once brushed
hack their hair, retaining only the soft
rings of hair on the side, a la Cleve
land. Now that the fair young mistress
of the White House has been deposed,
something new in the hair-dressing
line has been brought into fashion. It
is here and evidently here to stay. If
you should happen to meet a girl on
tho fashionable thoroughfare with a
circular patch on her forehead, think
not she has been wounded in a pugilis
tic encounter, or, if she bo a brunette,
that she is carrying a small stove-lid
directly over the bridge of her nose, but
remember that this is the very latest
fad in bangs.
Not Utility.
"Well, Dennis," said a gentloman to
his gardener, "I'm told you havo fallen
into bad habits."
"How is that, sor?"
"I hear that you have gotten to be|
a hard drinker."
"Harrud dlirinker, is it?"
"Yes."
"Begorra, it's few people as dhrinks
aisier than meself."
The results of recent experiments iu
the Mediterranean showing how far
daylight will penetrate the water were
found with gelatino-bromide plates. The
greatest depth was 1,518 feet, or 327
feet short of the. limit assigned some
years ago,