lloetrn attb pfecelUng.
UNDER THE BRIDGE.
My fnco was whiter than the dend;
My teeth were clinched; my staring eyes,
My ringing ears, my swimming head,
Were held by horrid sights and cries,
As o'er the bridge we swiftly sped,
As o'or that awful bridge we sped.
Below, a gulf where wuters raced;
Where waters poured, and somber death
Rode side by side the deathly faced,
With howling wrath and lurid breath;
Where pity was a thing misplaced,
And hope to mockery debused.
I looked, as awful horrors passed,
And saw a little child in prayer
Upon a raft that drifted fast.
She was alone, nnd yellow hair
Streamed 'round her on the whirling blast,
Streamed out to kiss the cruel blast.
As bj' some loving mother's knee,
Her tiny hands were raised to God:
Her face was raised in gentle plea
Beneath the heavenly Father's rod-
A cruel fate for such as she:
''Oil, set her free, and chasten me!''
In vain! for os her golden locks
Flashed here and there I saw the sign,
She vanished where the whirlpool mocks—
She vanished with n brow divine.
Witli nimbus formed of golden locks
She passed from sight beneath the rocks.
'Twas but a second that she gleamed
Upon me as the truin flew by;
'Twos but one ray of glory streamed
Whore glorious thousands came to die.
But ah, so young, so sweet she seemed—
I've thought of her unci drcuined, and
dreamed!
—[William W. Cook, Chicago News.
A KINDRED SPIRIT.
BY SUSAN A. WEISS.
N a private parlor of the
f B " os Ketclium's select
I boarding- house were
0 seated two ladies, the
ft personal resemblance l>e
jtprl tween whom marked
tl ,e,n aa sisters, though
J one was a matronly lady
/ of thirty, and the other
somo ten years younger.
"You don't mean to tell me, Jose
phine," said the elder, rather tartly,
"that you've discarded .Jack Rogers:"
"Why, notoxactly," the other replied,
hesitatingly. "I merely told him tliut
I thought we were not suited to each
other—that we would not be liappv to
gether."
"Not happy together! And why, j
pray# What is there to pre\ent any I
reasonable woman being happy with
Jack;' Where can j'ou find a more gen
erous, good humored, open-hearted fel
low, or one who will make a better bus
band' Why"—in a tone as of trium
phant argument—"he's the counterpart
of my own husband, although they're
only cousins; and 1 am sure no couplo !
was ever happier than Charlie and I. '
"Because you and Charlie suit each |
other. I don't deny that Mr. Rogers is
all you describe, and I like him well j
enough so far; but in some rospects we
are not at all suited to each other. We
are not congenial natures—not kindred
spirits."
"Kindred spirits?" repeated Mrs. :
Chubbuck, somewhat contemptuously. !
"What do you call a kindred spirit?" * i
"You may not understand me, Char
lotte," replied Josephine, a little loftily, •
"because you and I, though sisters, are
not cast in the tamo mould. That is
my misfortune—that I am not under
stood by even my nearest and dearest
relatives."
She said this very pathetically, and j
with a tear in her eye. Mrs. Chubbuck
looked at her half pityingly.
"I know, Josie, that you were always
excess voly sentimental and romantic,
which lam not, thank goodness! Still, !
I was in hopes that you would appro \
ciato Jack, with his good heart and good j
sense."
Josie shook her head with a little fas- !
tidious air.
"He's good enough in his way, but
not the man I ought to marry, lie's!
too realistic—too matter-of-fact, with
nothing aesthetic, or poetic, or spiritu
ally exalted about him. Why, he told !
me himself that he prefers prose to poe- ,
try, that ho don't care much for sculp- ;
ture or painting, that Too and Tenny- j
son wrote nonsense, and that he prefers
Dickens to Byron. How can I feel any
congeniality with such a nature? Then
to see how lie enjoys eating, especially i
oysters!"
"Jack does like good living, and so ;
do Charlie and I, though we are none |
of us gluttons. We all go for the raj
tional creature comforts of life, in which j
so much of its happiness consists," said
Mrs. ( hubbuek, composedly.
Miss Josephine lleyden gave a depre
catory shrug.
"llis very name is distasteful to me. j
Jack—Jack Rogers! Ho undignified and
prosaic! And he always has such a jolly |
sort of look, and—and I think he s i
growing fat."
"Josephine, you're too absurd. You j
have read poetry and romanco until '
Ah, that's Miss Ketchuui'a knock! j
Como in!"
Miss Ketch urn entered, smiling and !
simpering, followed by a tall, pale, j
cavaderous young man, bearing a coal |
scuttle.
"Ah, ladies, don't let me disturb you! |
Here, Junk in, put ou the coal here, if j
you please."
The young man obeyed. Daintily, |
dreamily, ami with a far-away and ab
sent-minded look, he placed the lumps
of anthracite in symmetrical order
within the grate. Then, erecting him
self, and looking loftily down upon
Miss Ketchum, lie said, in a hollow
voice:
"Ifnnything helse, mum?"
Miss Ketchum started.
"Nothing else, Junkiu you can go."
Junkin stalked with solemn dignity
to the door, threw back a ghostlike, un
conscious gaze, stumbled over a hassock,
shut the door noiselessly behind him,
let the scuttle fall in the ha'l with a
fenent clatter, and so finally disappeared
ffrom s : ght and sound.
"What nn ex tin ordinary creature!"
said Mrs. Chubbuck.
•'Quite ghoul like !" said Josephine.
Realiy > I never felt such nn antipathy to
any person as to that waiter. lie some
times quite makes my blood run cold,
with his srectral looks."
"Indeed I don't wonder at it, I assure
you," Miss Ketchum responded, with
nervous energy. "I nn\ sure 1 don't
know what to make of him, and never
did. He goes about the hfuse as quietly
as a cat, walks like a somnambulist, ap
parently seeing nothing, and vet evid
ently knows everything that goes on,
even when I prefer that he shouldn't.
Sometimes, I think he goes to sleep
while waiting at the table; and I have
heard him in the china closet talking to
himself.'
"Talking to himself ?"
"Talking to himself, actually ! And
rook complains that he treats her with
the haughtiest contempt, and calls the
other servants minion*. '
"Dear me! But he's from London,
isn't he? and perhaps that is the Eng
lish way."
"Cook believes him to be a nobleman
in disguise; but old Major Banks says
he is either knave or fool, he can't tell
which. But we won't be troubled with
him much longer. To-morrow his month
is up, and I've given him warning."
So Miss Ketcnum tripped away, and
as just then a visitor called to s"G Mrs.
C hubbuck, Miss Josephine Hoyden left
the room, and went to call upon her
friend, Miss Royster. Hero at least she
was sure of finding some sympathy.
Miss Royster, a willowy and some
what faded blonde, with very small waist
and rather thin hair, which contrived to
make a wonderful show by being frizzed
all over her hnud, was deep in the pages
of a new novel—"The Forsaken Bride"
—when her friend entered.
"Oh, Josie, I'm so glad that you've
come! I want you to read this lovely
description of the parting between
Eleotra and her lover, when— But, my
dear, what's the matter ?"
Josephine sank into a rocking-chair l
ami put her handkerchief to her cj-es.
"I feel so wretched, Louise—so lonely, !
ami misunderstood and unappreciated
by those around me. Why are some
persons gifted with finer and more ex
alted sensibilities than others, merely to
bo isolated and unhappy/"
AK'CT.IL'
"Ah, my dear," said Louise, with a
sympathetic sigh, 1 can feci for you ! I
am not as gifted as you, who write j
poetry, and nave such lofty aspirations i
after the beautiful and spiritual; but I i
can imagine how you feel, dwelling I
spiritually apart from the common herd,
as it were. Ele.-trn, in this lovely story, j
felt just like you do."
(In fact, Miss Louise, in this speech, ;
lmd been quoting from the book which
she held.)
Josephine wiped her eyes and looked i
up.
"Louise, dear," sbc said, pensively,
"I have Mime thing particular to toll i
vou. You read my last piece in the
Weekly Cornucopia ?"
"That lovolv piece, commencing:
Willi i(M eve upon tin? sun,
Di inking in I lie glorious dawning.
Km Hi and curl lily creatines scorning—'"
"No, no—that was in the first March
number, I mean the lines ending:
'".Seeking what may not be found.
Hearing still what iuitli no sound,
Seeing what none else may see-
Lonely e'er my soul must be.' "
"All, yes! that was indeed an ex
quisite and touching poem. How 1
wish I could write like you!"
"And would you believe it, dear, \
Charlotte called it nonsense i But there ;
was one who saw and appreciated it."
"Really! A man, I suppose? What's
his name.'" said Miss itoyster, with
sudden interest.
"Adrian," responded Josephine,
dreamily. "At least, so ho signed him
self. liere is his letter, Louise, written i
on rending those lines. You see, it is
directed to Tolnnlhe,' my uom de plume. I
The editor wouldn't give my real al- J
dress, but sent the note tome, enclosed, j
You see, ho (Adrian) claims to be a kin- j
died spirit, nnd thanks me for the plea- |
sure he experienced in finding his own j
thoughts and feelings so exactly ex- i
pressed."
"Dear—how romantic!" exclaimed
Louise, rapidly running her eye over,
the epistle, written on delicate, per- |
fumed paper. "And lie wants your ad- j
dress, or to meet you somewhere? What;
will you do?"
"1 really don't know. And that is ;
one reason why 1 told you of this. You •
must advise mc, Louise."
"But suppose he should turn out to i
bo not a gentleman?"
"That thought occurred to mo. I
must first find out who ho is—must see I
him without being myself seen. And so !
1 thought of appointing some time and
place—public, of course —and some j
token by which we might know each
other."
"But that seems too bold, don't it?—
and perhaps imprudent, if lie should
turn out to be not a perfect gentleman?"
"A man who professes to be above the
common herd, with refined and exalted
instincts, must ho a gentleman!" said j
Josephine, confidently. "But to satisfy i
you, how will it do to propose that ho ,
should wear a heliotrope button-bouquet,
and watch for the lady who drops her
purse in passing him? I won't drop it,
really, unless in appearance he conies
up to my expectations; and then I shall
be safe, for lie will never know that I
am lolanthc. And, on the other hand,
the purse will afford him a natural and
graceful way of presenting himself, by
picking it up and restoring it to me."
And so, after some discussion, this
plan was agreed upon, Miss Royster
promising to accompany her friend, and
support her through the somewhat try
ing, though delightfully romantic ad
venture.
It was five o'clock when the two ladies
entered the art gallery—the time and
place appointed for the meeting with
Adrian. Miss Royster was agitated,
and Josephine's heart beat violently as,
walking slowly down the long ball, they
nervously glanced amid the crowd in
search of a gentleman with heliotrope in
his button In le.
It was indee l an agitating moment for
Miss Heyden; for was s e not about to
meet, for the first time in her life, a per
son—and one of the other sex—in whom
she would recognize a kindred spirit?
One who could appreciate the poetry
nnd spirituality of her nature, and with
whom nhecMii'd walk—here, for instance,
amid these lovely art creations of genius
—in the delicious, mutual consciousness
of their being lifted above the common
place throng around them.
"I don't see him anywhere," said
Miss Royster, when they had nearly
reached the end of the gallery. "Sup
pose he don't come?"
"Oh, but he will—l'm sure lie. will,"
responded Josephine, tremulously.
"Ah!" with a start, "there's Jack!
What brought him here, I wonder? He
asked mc last evening to come, and I
refused. Let us get out of his sight, or
he'll spoil everything."
"Ho can't join us. Don't you see
that he's with that pretty Miss Maddox?
And how pleased she looks!"
Josephine g'anced slinrnly toward
Jack and the handsome, smiling girl on
his arm. For an install' even, she al
lowed her attention to be absorl>ed in
watching them, until aroused by
Louise's subdued exclamation:
" There he is! See the heliotrope in
his buttonhole!"
Miss Heyden thought she would have
fainted ! She could not summon courage
to raise her eyes, but mechanically and
tremblingly drew forth her purse.
" Ho's looking for us ! He's coming this
way !" whispered Miss Royster, seeming
very much inclined to run away.
But her friend nervously grasped her
wrist.
"Don't desert me, Louise—not now, as
such a trying moment. Wh-whore is
he ?"
" Coming ! There, I dont see him now!
He's behind that fat woman."
" Wh-what is he like ?" grasped Jose
phine.
" Tall, palo—but, ah ! here he is, close
to us ! —this under her breath.
It was from no intention of her own,
but simply the result of her nervous ag
itation, that at this moment the purse
slipped from Josephine's trembling fin
gers. And beforo she eould collect her
thoughts, or knew what to do, a tall fig
ure stepped quicklv forward, picked up
the purse, and with a low bow extended
it towards her.
She raised her eyes slowly from a pair
of highly-polished boots, gradually up
ward to a coat adorned with heliotrope
blossom, above which appeared a rather
striking satin necktie and a face. Then
she gave a start and an irrepressible lit
tle cry of ft.stoirshnient and horror, for
in that pale, haughty and cadaverous
visage she had recognised the unmistak
able lineaments of—Junkiii.
Mr. Jack Rogers, who happened to be
not far off, heard the cry, and turning
quickly, beheld Miss Josephine Hoyden
in the act of fainting in the arms of her
friend.
In an instant he had pushed his way
through the group gathered about the
young lady, and taken lier into his own
strong arms.
" It is the hoat," said the fat lady, fan
ning liesvelf.
"No 1 think it was a strange man who
frightened her. He picked up her purse,
which I saw her accidentally drop
and—"
"Wherein lie?" "Stop him !" "Close
the doors! ""Call the police" were
the cries which now arose ; in the midst
of which Miss Hoyden slowly recovered
and opened her eyes.
On finding herself in the arms of a man,
she gave a shiver of fear and loathing,
until .lack's voice whispered :
"Calm yourself, Josie. Don'tyonknow
me? "
" Oil Jack, is it you ? I'm so glad! Oh,
dear Jack, take mo home, please—won't
your"
As they passed down the gallery, they
heard some one say ;
" It must have lieen the tall, slim fel
low who pushed past us at the head of
the stairs. I've seen him before."
And then came broken sentences —"as-
pired to bo an actor"—"comic-song
writer"—" scene painter at the Ar
cade " —saw him last—restauraut wait
er—"
And with these words echoing in her
ears, and dyeing them and her cheeks
crimson, Miss Josephine Heyden was
assisted into a hack and driven homo
with Louise and Mr. Jack Rogers.
She nover afterward saw J unkin—nei
ther her purse.
But she does not regret the latter, for,
as she recently remarked so Miss Roy
ster :
"It was a small price to pay for such
a husband as I have ; for Louise, dear
if it had not have been for that horrid
affair I should never have appreciated
Jack.
A Chiropodist Has His Say
"Year before last Iliad two women
patrons to one man," said a chiropodist.
"But last year, and so far this year,
the falling off in the former patronage
has been more than one half. But
there has been no decrease in the num
ber of my male customers. How do I
account for all this.' Easily. Fashion
in shoes is responsible for it. A year
and a half ago the high, narrow French
heels were the fashion in woman's shoes,
and they are one ol' the best friends a
chiropodist can have. They are regu
lar and rapid breeders of corns. No
woman can wear a pair of such shoes
long without looking up a corn doctor.
But the low fiat heel is now the
fashion. If the rest of the shoo fits the
foot, the heels are the natural enemy of
corns and the chiroprdist has to suffer.
It is generally believed that woman arc
more vain of their feet than men are of
theirs, but my experience lias showu
me that quite the contrary is the fact.
Men will insist in making their foot
look small, and any shoe that will do
that is the fashion for them. The nar
row-toed or "toothpick" stylo of men's
shoes, worn nmv as much as ever, will
always insure the corn doctor a living,
especially if the shoos are patent leather.
A patent leather shoe, for some reason,
will call a corn into being much quicker
than an ordinary shoo:
The fellows who don't have corns are
those who wear roomy-toed shoes.
But they musn't be too large, a 81100
too largo is as bad as one too small. An
oversized shoo makes corns on the bot
tom of the feet, and they are the worst
kind. The late war was the greatest
corn-curor over known. I never knew
of a single easo of a soldier in that war
who suffered from corns, and I was all
through it. Jf a law should be passed
that no shoe should bo worn in this
country but the pattern army shoo of
the rebellion, the corn doctor's occupa
tion would begone. "
Women Jugglers of India.
I saw two women jugglers at Jeypore,
writes Frank (1. Carpenter. They were
bright, intelligent-looking girls, one of
whom appeared almost old enough to be
the mother of the other. They did many
| wonderful things, one of which wasniix
} itig up sand in water and then putting
| the hand into the discolored fluid, they
| brought a handful of sand, which they
filtered hrough their fingers as dry
as before it went in. The youngest
fo these girls was perhaps fifteen.
She was tall, well-formed and fine-look
ing. She had bracelets on arms and on
feet, and her eyes were as beautiful as
those of a gazelle. One of her tricks was
the lifting of a heavy chair by her eye
lids, the thought of which almost makes
my eyes sore. The chair was a heavy
mahogany one, which belonged to the
room in which I was staying. She tied
two strong strings to the t< p of this and
affixed the ends of those strings to her
eyes by little round cups, each about
the size of a nickel. These fitted over the
eyeballs and under the lids, and she
bent over while they were so fastened.
Raising herself, she pulled up the chair
with these strings with the muscles of
her eyelids and carried it from one side
of the room to the other. It was a hor
rible sight, and as she took the metal
cups from her eyes they filled with water
and she almost sank to the floor. I told
her the trick]was disgusting, and that she
ought never to try it again. Still for all
this and the rest of the show tlie<-c girls
were well satisfied with two rupees or
about 70 cents.
THE JOKERS' BUDGET.
JESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY
MEN OF THE FRESS.
The Summer Girl—A Lone: Felt
Want Supplied—An Awful Request.
TWINS HORN APART.
The mother of iv family showed the
ticket-collector on the mil way a couple
of lialf-fave tickets for her two children.
The latter, after looking at them, doubt
fully, said:
•'How old are they."
"They are only six, and they arc j
twins."
"Ah "
Then, after a moment's pause, the
man inquired:
"And where were they horn?"
The mother (unthinkingly) : This one '
was born in New York, and the other in ■
Paris.—[Feuille d'Avit.
CERTAIN TO (JO UIOIIER.
"How much are blackberries?" she
asked a Woodward avenue grocer.
"Ten cents, ma'am." "Isn't that high?" j
"Well, yes; but they are certain to go j
higher." "Do you think so?" "Why, j
certainly. If Australia and II us si a go j
to war, as now seems probable, black
berries will jump lo 50 cents a quart in !
no time." "Yes, I 'spose so, and 1 >
'spose Charles will agree that I ought to j
buy now. You can gi\e me a pint." ■
—[Detroit Free Press.
THE FOND UNOIiE's REPLY.
A young man known as a "gilded
youth" sent the following note to a rich
uncle the other night: "Not one word—
if you do not send mo §2,000 before mid
night I shall cease to live." A similiar
demand had been received earlier in the
day, so the fond undo replied: "in re
spouse to a former favor I have already
forwarded you my revolver. It is in
good condition and loaded."
A NECESSARY EVIL,
Dev. Mr. Russia—l've succeeded in
converting every man in this camp ex
ceping one. Can't we together influence
J look-Nose Sam to turn over a now
leaf ?
Gnawed Riley (the scout) —"Twouldn't
nowise do, parson. Why, we wouldn't
have a soul left to swear at th' mules. —
[Judge.
THE SUMMER GIRL.
She dresM's now in linen or pique,
Or muslin light or lawn ;
Witli ribbons bright, Ihechnrniiugfiprito,
.She's fairer than the dawn.
1 sometimes meet her in the lons,
Where lilacs emit. the breeze—
Her lovely face, her sprightly grace,
And other witcheries
Entrance, bewitch ine—nay, set all
My senses in a whirl
As she goes by, with inaiiner sly—
The beauteous summer girl.
—[Courier.
A HEALTnY CLIMATE.
Easterner—ls Nebraska a healthy
State?
Nebraska Mail—Hoalty! Well sir,
there's an old man in Omaha named
William Shakespeare, and hang me if I
don't believe he's the original.—[New
York Weekly.
DISTRUSTED THE FISHERMAN'S SCALES.
"Have you got vour scales with you?"
rnid the trout to the sucker.
"I have," answered the sinker.
"Why?"
"Well," said the trout, "I'm goihg to
take that fly, and I'd like, to L>e weighed
before I leave the brook, just for my own
satisfaction."
NO WEDDING TOUR.
Miss Gusher- I have just heard from
our mutual friend, Miss .Jorihanks.
She has married the Duke d'Bellcorde.
Miss Crusher—Foitunato girl! Did
they take a wedding tour?
Miss Gusher—The duke's employers
could not spare him. Ho drives a horse
car on Tenth avenue—[Drake's Maga
zine.
ACCUSING PUSS.
Little Margery, playing witli her kit I
ton, got a rather severe scratch from her |
pet. Her lips trembled for an instant, j
and then she assumed the commanding
Attitude that her mother had assumed
toward her under somewhat similar eir- ;
cumstancos, and, extending her hand,
said sternly: "Titty, dive me that pin?" j
KEEPING 11 Elt DOWN.
Mrs. Struckitt (who recently enter- i
tained a Count) —Have you ever had '
any foreign noblemen ns guests?
Mrs. Mnnorboni (quietly)—No; only i
ns servants.—[PucK.
Miss Gotham Why do you cut Mr.
Self made?
Miss Hubbcrre—He wrote mo that ho
would ne\er do anything to disturb my
peace of mind.
Miss Gotham—Well?
Miss Hubberro—Ho spelt it "piece."
—[Town Topics.
A LONG FELT WANT SUPPLIED.
First Omalinn- I've been told that
you have made nil invention that will
bring you great wealth. What is it?
Second Omahnn —A pocket circular
saw, designed to cut restaurant and hotel
beefsteak. Omaha World.
INCONTROVERTIBLE.
She—l'm surprised at you, sir, to
come home at this hour, "ion ought to
bo ashamed to look at the clock.
He—No'sh, denish ; other waysh
about—cloeksh 'shamed to look at. me,
'cause ho'sh holding both hissli hands
before liissh face.— |Fiank Leslie.
A ROUNDABOUT ROUTE.
Mrs. G*bb—Where are you going
this summer'?
Mrs. Gadd (lightly)—Oh, to New
port, Haintogft, and I don't know where
all. We will make the rounds, 1 sup
pose. Haven't decided yet. just when
we will start, but I'll lot you know, my
dear,
Mrs. Gnbb (meaningly)- Oh, I'll
be sure to hear of it when you leave, be
cause my Cousin John is the railroad
ticket agent here.
Mrs. Gndd (hastily)— Our first jour
ney, however, will he to my dear aunt's
farm, near Squnshville, and I do hope
she won't insist on keening us all sum
mer, as she did last year.—[New York
Weekly.
whAT THE JUSTICE TOOK.
The Justice—Drunk and disorderly.
What have you to say?
The Prisoner—Hie—take something.
Tiie Justice—Thanks; I'll take $lO.
—[Troy Press.
"TWO-FOBS."
"Did you get that box of cigars I sent
you?" inuuired his fiancee.
"Yes, dear."
"Ami how did yon like them?"
"The box was very nice indeed," ho
.'aid softly.—[Judge.
A QUIET AFFAIR.
Hloodgood—l understand thatßrowno
was married yesterday?
Poteyboy- Yes, I was there.
Hloodgood—Rather a quiet wedding,
wasn't it?
Poseybov—Pe i-h illy. Roth the bride
and groom were so scared that they
could bar lly speak above a whisper.—
[Burlington Free Press.
ECONOMY.
Boy—Oh, Mamma, our cat has caught
a rat.
Mamma —Take it. away from Puss and
give it to the Chinese laundryman when
lie calls. 11(3 11 allow a deduetiou on
the wash. —[Epoch.
WHAT DID HE MEAN?
Reginald do Binks (in a theatre) —
Good evening, Mr. l aser, will you allow
me to take a seat by you?
Mr. laser— Ah, with pleasure. How
is it that you arc here? Don't you play
to-night ?
Reginald do Binks—No, 1 don't ap
pear this evening.
Mr. Faser—Oh, lam very glad.—[San
Francisco Wasp.
SHE SUCCEEDED TOO WELL.
" Nellie," said the mother to her four
year-old little one, who was sittting
quietly in a distant corner of the room,
" what are you doing?"
"Drawing a picture on my slato," re
plied Nebie.
"A picture?" rejoined the mother
glancing over her shoulder. " Yes, and
a pretty one. What is it?"
"It's my kitty," said Nellie.
" But it looks more like a tree."
"Yes, I made it so that my left hand
wouldn't know what my right hand had
done. And I guess it don't, do you?"
A TERRIBLE STRAIN.
First Bohemian—l never knew what
fear was except once.
Second B.—When was that?
First B.— I was seated penniless in
a beer saloon, a friend entered, and I
was afraid lie wouldn't treat.—[Epoch.
A SAFE HIDING-PLACE.
Wife—Where shall we hide the silver
while wo are away?
Husband—Put it in the pockets of
your drcs-es in the closet.
A CHANGE OF INSTRUMENT.
"I've just written a waltz. Got a pi
ano? 11l tiy to run over it for you."
"No, I liuven t a piano; but I have a
dog. You might try it on him."
WHY SHE JUMPED THE OTHER WAY.
Bessie—You refused Mr. do Temps?
Why, any other girl would jump at an
offer from him.
Maud (just graduated)—Oh, I know
lie's handsome, but J never could marry
such an ignorant man. Why, I asked
him a few questions about the ditferen
titation in plotoplasinic molecular bi
valves, and do you know, a'l he said
was, "I suppose so!"—[Lawrence Amer
ican.
THE WAY TO GF.T LEFT.
Old Fossil got upon a stile.
And said. I'll just sit hrre and smile,
And Fortune will embrace me."
But when the damn pussvd by she said,
"Old fellow, go and hag your head;
I don't like issues that are dead;
Jump down from there and chase me.*'
-[Pbiludeluhia Press.
THE BALL-PLAYER OF THE FUTURE.
Catcher McMieklin —Better unload
'in right here, fellers, where dey'll bo
handy t' dor plate.—[Judge.
AN AWFUL REQUEST.
Do Smythe—There was only one
thing I ever u&lud of De Jones that ho
refused.
Merritt I'm surprised to hear that,
for he's very generous. It must have
been something unreasonable.
Do Smy the I asked liini for some
money he hud borrowed.
A Home for Method st Deaconesses.
The dedication of the home for
I Methodist deaconesses, at No. 241 West
Fourteenth st., marked a new departure)
for Methodism in thisoi y. It was only
last year that the general conference es
tablished the order of deaconesses.
Since then the movement lias taken
shape rapidly, and there are now dea
conesses' homes in Chicago, Cincinnati,
Boston, Phladolphiu, Omaha and De
troit, Jt is an effort, ns Dr. Crawford
pointed out in his speech at the dedica
tion, to give the Methodist Church the
aid of woman thoroughly organized for
works of mercy and charity, a tremen
mous force wlrch has for centuries been
monopolized by the Roman Church.
For admission to the order of deacon
esses two years' probation and instruc
tion are noc( s- ary, and the present aim
of the New York home is to train these
candidates. They are expected to find
their chief field in ministering to tho
suffering women and children of the
tenement-house districts, and to carry
the practical work of Christianity into
those tio'ds whero men are nearly or
quilo useles. No vow ß are required but
candidates will only be accepted who
are over twenty-three years old, and who
may reasonably bo expected to dovoto
their lives to the work.
The home is a largo twenty-foot house.
The rent is $2,000 a year, and the run
ning expenses will Vie. from $2,500 to
$3,500, but the managers have no doubt
that the funds will be found. Two sub
scriptions of SSOO each were received on
tho opening night and many of froms2s
to #IOO each. Each Methodist church
in the city has furnished one room in the
home, and the experiment is under the
management of the City Church Exten
sion and Missionary Society.—[New
York Tribune.
AN OSTRICH FARM.
RAISING THE GREAT BIRD ON
CALIFORNIA RANCHES.
How the Rapidly Growing 1 and In
teresting Industry is Conducted.—
General Utility of the Ostrich.
It is not generally known that the in
dustry of ostrich farming promises to
become a great one in the United
States. But the last annual report of
the Secretary of Agriculture gives some
valuable ana very interesting informa
tion 011 the subject. Several great os
trich farms are now located in Southern
California, near Los Angelos end San
Diego, and visitors to that region are
surprised to see large troops, of native
and acclimated ostriches. America has
for many years imported half of the
millions of ostricli feathers raised in
South Africa, and some years ago it o •
curred to Dr. Charles J. Sketchly, who
was, before the Boer wars, one of the
largo t ostricli farmers in Africa, that if
ostrichs could lie successfully exported
and naturalized in America the profit
would be immense. The duty 011
leathers would be avoided, thereby ad
ding at least 25 per cent, to the income.
In 1882 he started from Capo Town with
a troop of 200 picked ostriches 011 their
way to America, and after a long and
tedious voyage via Buenos Ayres arrived
at New York in December, and there
shipped these delicate tropical birds,
overland via Chicago and Omalia
to the coast, a total distance of
23,000 miles. The ordeal was a
most trying one, but twenty-two ar
rived in California in fair condition
and were at once taken to Ana
heim. A company was soon formed,
the California Ostrich Company, repre
senting s3o,ooocapital, with Dr. Sketch
ly as superintendent. The farm upon
which they were placed was of about
GOO acres. The birds w*ro chiefly con
fined in small pens forming nn L, with
twelve compartments. These inclosures
were walled around with planks stand
ing about four feet high. These planks
were twelve inches wide by three indies
thick. All ordinary fence would not re
sist them, as they sometimes, especially
when frightened by dogs, ran against it
with great force. Ostriches are mortally
afraid of dogs, and lionce. this animal is
prohibited from the vicinity of the
ostrich ranch. The first year these birds
resided in America they presented the
company from April 12 to October of
the same year, with 270 eggs. The first
chick was hatched July 28, 1883. The
pioneer American ostrich chick began
its career by feasting 011 broken sea
shells; but it finally in a few days took
to chopped clover and corn meal. The
arrival of so large a troop of ostriches in
Now York naturally created wide spread
interest. About this time, or while
these ostriches were 011 their way to
America, another company, the Ameri
can Ostrich Company, was set on foot
in Maine, with Mr. E. J. Johnson ns
manager. He went to Africa and spent
a year in studying the habits and man
agement of these "birds" as they are
called. Ho started with twenty-three
birds and landed at New Orleans De
cember, 1883, after a voyage of fifty
three days. The birds were confined
in the vessel sixty-three days, owing to
delays at the cape. None died 011 the
voyage. This is remarkable, and is the
only mstaiico, except when four birds
were sent by steamer to Australia. They
made the trip in twenty-four days.
Eight miles from Fall Brook, Cal., is ;
a bit of Africa dropped down between
the hills. A little valley encircled by j
barren hills, a herd of ostriches feeding, I
the old adobe where the incubators are j
kept, pomegranate trees, and passion i
vines climbing over the low house, all |
make up a picture very unlike the con .
veutional type of Ameriban landscape'*. I
The birds seem to take kindly to their j
adopted home. Thoro are about forty |
kept, at the ranch at present. The old |
birds are placed in pairs in their several j
pens, and only the young are allowed j
to wander over the grounds. This is the j
ostrich ranch established by Mr. John- I
son and tho second in the United \
States.
The pioneers of ostrich farming liatl (
many difficulties to contend with. The (
long journey from Africa affected the ]
x italitv ami fertility of the first importa- j
tions. Both Skctclily and Johnsii had ,
long, hard pill's and just bogan to see f
daylight in 1887. To add to their many ,
discouragements the price of ostrich
plumes fell to a small amount. The j ,
feathers of little birds became fashion (
able ; so the sale of ostrich plumes, the |
chief source of income in ostrich farm- j ,
ing was meager; but the fashion is now | j
setting the other way, and choice' ,
plumes will bo in good demand at fancy
prices. The Capo Colony Government (
also took measures to injure the Amori j j
can formers by the imposition of an ex- |
port duty. The South American ostrich i f
farmers became alarmed at this large • j
exportation. They now have, it is esti- j ,
mated, about #50,000,000 inxested in j \
this industry, and they feared if they all i .
used large troops of birds to he freely ■
sent to the very land that took every j (
year one-half or more of their feathers, ,
this immense industry would he crip
pled, and so the colonial authorities,
were induced to impose a duty of #SOO
on each bird taken out of the country.
But American enterprise was far from
discouraged by this "beneficent tarifi'." j
The high export tax of #SOO on each
bird will practh ally prevent any fur- ■
tlier shipments from Cape Colony, as |
that will make the e< st of the birds not: '
far from #I,OOO each when they reach
this country, especially when we con
sider the losses that are apt to occur, but
the farms are prospering and the indus- j
try promises to become a great one. j
There are now six breeding farms in
California. One of the groat difficul- !
t'os mot in this now enterprise was in j
obtaining reliable artificial incubators. '
If tlio old bird is allowed to sit she will
stop laying when about sixteen eggs are 1
deposited in the hollow nest they scoop
out for a resting place for the eggs, :
Then these lords are very sensitive and
take fright and offense very easily, and 1
if the eggs are handle 1 even, or the nest |
but slighlly disturbed, she will forsake
the next. Sometimes they will leave it
when the chicks a e nearly ready to
break through the shell. The risk in
getting chicks hatched is quite as great,
especially with young birds, ns it lias
proved with the incubators. Various
experiments were made and many eggs
spoiled before an incubator was found
( tliat was at all reliable.
The ostrich lays an egg every third
; day. The eggs are large, many of thciu
five or six inches through the long dia
! meter and they weigh from three to five
j pounds each. The shell is usually von i
' thick, sometimes one-sixteenth of an
inch. The contents rosemh'e that of a j
hen's egg, and amount to forty iluid |
ouuees. The period of incubation is 1
variously given at from thirty-eight, to
forty-two days, and doubtless depends j
upon the vitality and development of
the chick. The average in California
is thirtv-nino days; The young chick
can be heard in lis s' ell days before it
appears. It. is sometimes necessary to j
assist the chick in breaking the shell. |
In tho wihls of Africa the crows have
learned to crush the ostrich eggs by let
ting stones fall on them from a height.
In Africa tho empty shells are used to
carry water; a network of grass is made,
so that several may be carried at once.
In California there is a ready sale lor
the empty shell, in some instances as
high as #5 being paid for them as a
curiosity.
The ostrich industry began in Capo
Colony in 18G5, with' eighty-five birds,
but when a de ado had rolled around
the number had increased to 22,247 os
triches. Then the industry began to at
tract general attention. The demand
for birds for fanning purposes was so
great, especially for the next few years,
that fabulous prices wore realized by
those who had birds to sell. There are
now more than 100,000 ostriches in
►South Africa. The value of the expor
tation of feathers from Africa was, at
Inst accounts, the enormous sum of
#1,000,000 at least. The New York im
porters have long enjoyed a monopoly
in this business, and many large for
tunes have been made by them.
Dr. Duncan, who prepared tho paper
on ostrich farming for the department,
is an enthusiast 011 the general utility of
the ostrich. Ostriches can be utilized
as food, and may come to rank high as
an a tide of diet when so numerous as
to he profitoble in flint direction. The
egg has been regarded ns a rare delicacy
in Africa. When an ostrich in South
Africa is killed, from accident or other
causes, every part of the bird is utilized.
The first step is to remove tho skin so
as to preserve the feathers uninjured.
The next is to melt the fat, which is
poured into bags made of the skin of the
t highs tied in the lower cud. The grease
or fat of the bird in good condition will
till tho skin of both legs, which hold
about four gallons; not only is it eaten
with bread and used in the preparation
of "kookoosoo" and other foods, but the
Arabs regard it as a useful application
in certain maladies. 111 all cases of
rheumatism or acute pains it is used by
being well rubbed in, and then the af
fected parts are covered with heated
saiul.
Those who have tasted ostrich meat
state that it is both wholesome and pal
atable, although, as might bo expected
in tho wild bird, it is somewhat lean
and tough. When the birds have been
domesticated,however, and fed on clover
and grain, the meat becomes juicy and
tender.
Experiments have been made from
time to time with a view to test the.cap
ability of tho ostrich in drawing and
carrying burdens. Dr. Sparru an, a
century ago (1775), saw mounted os
triches at tho Capo; and before him
Moore had recorded his having seen an
Englishman at Joar traveling lung
distances upon a bridled ostrich.
When domesticated in Texas, as they
doubtless will be, says Dr. Duncan, wo
expect to hear that the cowboys utilize
ystriches in hording < attic. Their fleet
ness should make them excellent mounts
for scouts and couriers.
Even tho skeleton of an ostrich com
mands a good price for public museums.
Prof. Ward, of Rochester, asks $125 for
a full mounted ostrich skeleton.—(De
troit Prco Press.
The Prince Imperial of Japan.
Compared to his imperial father, even
at the present day, Prince Hani is much
more emancipated, and none of the old
traditions seem to have any weight in
regulating his conduct. There was no
precedent to follow in the education of
a Japanese prince in the modern way,
and Prince Hum lias made many laws
for himself. He is a wonderfully bright
and precocious little fellow, and his
small, twinkling black eves are full ot
mischief and sco everything. He is
hardly taller than an American boy of
six years of age, but he has at times tho
dignity, tho pride of birth, and con
sciousness of station and power, of a
man of sixty. His eyes are not slant
ing, nor indeed docs one often see in u
Japanese face the wonderful oblique
eyes beloved of the caricaturists. The
peculiarity in tho expression of their
eye is given by the eyelids being fast
ened in cither corner, as if a few stiches
had been taken there. This makes it
impossible for them to lift tho eyelids
as high as wo do, and gives the narrower
slils, through which they gaze, the pec
uliar Oriental look. One often sees
Japanese with as round, wide-open eyes
as those of our race, and it gives an
especial beauty to their countenances.
Prince Haru lias the exquisitely
smooth, tine yellow skin that is one of
tho points of greatest beauty in Japanese
children, and a bright color sometimes
shows in the pale yellow of his little
cheeks. Ho has the rank of a colonel in
the Japanese army, and wears his mili
tary uniform and his cup with tho gold
star all the time, his clothes being dark
blue cloth' in winter and white duck in
summer. He is fond of riding, and, when
mounted, tho miniature colonel trots
along at a lino gait, giving and return
ing the military salute as lie passes an
officer or a sentry, like a young marti
net.—(St. Nicholas.
Mind-Destroying Drugs.
An insanity specialist, in a recent con
versation as to the number of young men
and women at present in asylums l'rom
the use of opium, morphine, eoacine and
kindred narcotics, stated that the subject
had given him more trouble than all
other forms of insanity c mibined. Ho
said, that among his patients were those
; whose minds had become unbalanced
; through dr'uk, family afflictions, lnisi
i Hess losses and from other causes, but
I tho worst cases were those whose minds
I were destroyed through the use of nur
i cities. Tho number of patients from
this cause is rapidly increasing, and it
; is said that there have been more men
j and women committed during tho last
i six months for dementia occasioned by
1 drugs, than there wore for tho same
• reason during the ten previous years.
It is beyond question that narcotics are
a more prolific source of insanity tluin
j all other causes combined.
The Realm of the Popf y King.
I Life in a" opium joint lias many
1 queer features and patrons as well. A
gentleman who visited the realm of the
poppy king was surpriced to see several
well known men there. They all occu
pied a lower bunk and all were or had
been smoking. The first familiar face
was that of a middle-weight pugilist, his
nearest neighbor being the author of
oousiderftb'o renown. (Joseby was one
i of the swiftest telegraph operators in
earnest conversation with a very fast
j compositor, who rested near a young
I woman once prominent ns an amateur
! actress. Each one was under the in
fluence of the drug and one member of
j lho party, it was learned, had been in
! the vile-smelling den thirty six hours,
! smoking almost incessantly. Tho police
i afford the four horrible looking ( iiina
men who run the place ample protection,
but they don't do it for nothing.—(New
j York Graphic.