The Patton courier. (Patton, Cambria Co., Pa.) 1893-1936, April 24, 1903, Image 6

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    mother, wore an exprossion at 1 once
| scared and pleading. ]
Hut he remembered that father had
{told him to bn his solid litte man,
and not let all the children think he
was a baby. 5) he bravely awaliowsd
{that funny lump in his throat, which
aned Boy.
¥ shells!
; Be 1s Just ae fell of tus
Ass kiiten in ths sus!
Dn is bead & ribbonsd earl
Makes him book ‘trost ike 8 girl
What a blessing anil » jo
Is my tar, oid-lashions i boy!
et Reginter,
Lion is a big black dog whose mas-
| tor sends him to the postoffice for his |
| letters, When the clerk sees the shag-
no head at the window he puta the
| letters and paper in Lion's mouth, and
| away he trots, never losing a bi of it
n- | One day, when coming home from the
office, he saw a piece of cake on the
sidewalk. Now Lion is very fond of
eake, and he was hungry; but, if he
put the Istters down some ons might
run off with them, for it was on a
s | Busy street. The shaggy head was still
for a minute, as if thinking. when,
. | dropping the letters carefully on the
or ‘upon a copy of the
Argue 8 ring on a table before
won, “Tom, dearest” sald the wolce
| i which was so wonderful and so differ
{ ent from all olher voices in the world,
i really began to think you never
were coming to see me again.”
There was a curious mixture of joy
: irreprossibie
» laughter in her tone. Bhrridan turned
; away from the dreary reality of brown
stone houses frowning grimly in the
fajiing snow, back to the enchanting
asd pain and bubbling.
1 but forbidden delight of the room so
andl soothing. He dared
not Ht his ayes to hers, but he sald
He | quite firmly In view of the mad biat-
F Ing of his heart:
1 "1 bare been sent up by the Daily
| Argus to interview you about your en-
El gagemen t. Mise ‘Winterton.
Bi "Oh, indeed,” said the girl, smiling
: hapotly, “you may tell them it's quite
“Oh, Mariot!" burst
iq AR Arie : forth poor
Sheridan, helplessly
in spite of his
sat | fixed determination to mere his iden
. { Uty in that of his paper.
_ {It can’t be true?”
“It lan’t,
“Yes, It is, dourest,” she sald, going
straight up to hm and putting her
hands on his broad shoulders. “You
ought to know i's been true for nearly
three months, Tom."
i But} gave you back your freedom.
you know,” gaspied the young man in
3 3 know you tried to” she whisper-
ed to his coat! “but, you foolish Tom,
didnt you Botice that 1 didn’t take 117”
The editorial rooms of the Daily Ar-
| Bus were unenriched by the presence of
young Sheridan on the day of bis un.
successful attempt to merge his (dent!
ty in that of the paper. The city edi-
f | tor was in a very bad humor on accoust
| of this extraordinary fact, as all the of-
fice boys could lear testimony. An en-
‘tire column had been reserved confl-
"| dently for Sheridan's story, and as a
1 result of his default a column of el
B { derly tid-bits had disgraced the even-
: ing edition, :
~The temperature was far below zero
fon the following morning when the
young reporter came nn
“Sheridan” bogan the city editor,
| sternly, “where is your story?"
“Well,” confessed the young man,
flushing with the consciousness of
B1 guilt, “she admitted she's engaged, but
tO | it's not to be announced yet. And it is
© | not the English duke, after all.”
i "Who is it, then? Did you get Mis
| name?” asked the editor, professionally
| on the alert.
1 got his name and address, * sald
Bheridan, still smi pri guiltily, “but
6, a3 a special favor, not to}
1 give | it 0 the press just yet. However,
| she ® Promises the Argus exclusive news
» grow the “ty editor.
- But at last the hour arrived,
} ralk, he placed one big black paw
{on them. and then ate the cake as if
" rite ia —— Fine alee be enjoyed it.—Light of Truth,
x Hant face, 40 dear, 80 aif
“Diogenes the Wise.”
With all his faults the old philosos
1 pher of Athens was often called “Di-
ogenes the Wise"
Whether his wis
dom was really wo great an to deserve
that title may be doubted. But his
| worst faults seem to have been good
qualities carried to excess,
{log too much luxury, he cit himself
{off from the comforts of life! in his
In oppos-
enapernens to make life simple, ho lost
| ent of its gentilities; he was saving
{st the expense of neatness, truthful
at the cost of courtesy, and pinsin spok-
{en even fo rudeness. Ona would say
j that he was coarse grained by nature,
but he showed signs of tenderness and
even refinement, which proved that
the grain was not entirely conrse, and
{ which made us wonder al an age that |
i could produce two men so wise and yet
{ so different as Diogenes
the rude,
“walking philosopher” of his time, and
{ Pilato, the polished and aristocratic
gentietnan —8t. Nicholas .
Which Are You?
Two boys went to gather prapes
cause the grapes had sends in them.
Two men, being convalescent, wore
asked how they were. One sald, “1
um better today.” The other said, “J
Whi worse yesterday.” :
When it rains one man says, “This
will make mud:” another, “This will
lay the dust.” : :
Two boys examined a bush. One ob
served that it had a thorn; the other
that it had a rose
Two children Jooking through enol
ored glasses, one sald, “The world is
blue:” and the other wmald, “It
Two boys having a bee, one got |
honey, the other got stung The first
called it a Boney bee, the other a sting
ing bee.
man. "l am sorry | must die” says
“I am glad ,” says one, “that it Ix no
says another,
worse.” “1 sm sorry”
“that it ts no better”
One ways, “Our good is mized with
evil” Another gays, “Our
mixed with good." Christian Register,
What is the difference bitwoeen Joan
of Are and Noah's ark? One was made |
of gopher wood and the other Maid of
What 4s the difference between a
chicken with one wing and one with
two? A difference of (u) o-pinfoun.
What is the greatest thing to take
before singing? Breath.
Why do most girls like ribbons?
They thick the beaux becoming.
Why is & blackamith's apron like an
unpopular girl? It keeps the sparks
Why are girls good postofice clerks?
Because they understand managing the
What animals are admitted to the
wera? White kids
Ae {5 a good looking (g) lass.
When is a schoolmaster like a man
¥ith one eye? When he has a va
wney for a pupil
Why is a sheet of postage stamps
Hike distant relatives? DBocause they
are only slightly connected.
Why can the world never come to an
end? Because it is round,
First Impressions.
“Hurry up. mother! Ther close the
doors when it is 9 o'clock, you know.”
Jt was his first day at school, and
the little lad could scarcely await the
moment for departure. His constant
chatter showed his fear of being late
and he
was shown into a large room where
there were many children. His eyes
opened wider and wider, but he did
. not have a word to say; his time was
+ all taken up with just looking. Pres-
1b ently he found that his mother was
| kissing him, and telling Him to be a
| good bey. Then a strange young indy
swim unlecs thoy are water fowl
fot swim, or. rather,
P they canpol swim they will “ent thelr
One was Happy because they found | throats” with their front hoofs fo the
grapes. The other was unhappy he
evil is
i fish that she could seize
| became customary for the fishermen
| to anchor thelr boats in front of the
i camp and wade ashore fo prevent the
In what key should a declaration of
Yove be made? Be mine ah! (B minor). |
| somehow made his voice sound so odd |
and queer as he said to his mother,
for me at noon.”
Thus began his first shoo] day. Hea
was placed on a hard little seat be
bind a tiny desk, and for a time he
felt that If he moved a finger some
thing awful would happen: but soon
be saw that things were taking place
around him, and he raised his head.
Ha looked at the other boys, front,
back and all around.
ho saw one bisy stand up and say,
“(a-t.” Then another boy stood up
and sald, "Boy
learned at schoni? Why he kaow
how to spell those words long ago!
He thought he waz going to learn
something new. His Jeart swelled
i with all the imporiance of hia seven
years, and he could seurcely mit stifl
until he was given a chance to show
them how easily
count all that (hey wers spelling and
Then when 12 o'clock came and he
marched with the others like little sol
diers to the street, this little Ind looked
eagerly for a face that he was sure
would be waiting. With one Iittle
scream he fairly flew to her, and clasp.
ing his arms round her neck, said:
“Mother, this is such & funny school!
Ther didn't teach us anything new at
all. The tescher just told the boys
how to spell eal asd pig sed hen. But
1 showed har | could dn much ‘better
than that.
“Well, what did my littls bor say {
when the teacher asked him to spell?”
“Why. sha wasted ma lo spell row,
(but 1 just got up and sald, Meade
sbpepel | “Youth's Companion.
Animals That Swim,
Theres is hardly an snimal knoe
that cannot swim. Most animals ars
perfectly ready to swin when neces.
gary. and will cross deep water hy
swimming rather than to go aroun? iL
Bome animals swim ohly when the
greatest necessity drives them to it
Birds, on the other hand, cannot
ery one knows how miserably chickens
perish In water Song birds are equal
iy helpless. Even the widers drown in
det) wWaler.
It ia a common belis! that ples can-
ihat, although
As a matter of fact the domestic pig
Is not a willing swimmer, and will
take to the water only in the most se
rivius emergency. But the wild boar
swims madily, and taken to the water
invariably if hunted in a direction that
jets to It.
The domestic cat is & very good and
| swift swimmer, despite her objection
| to water,
the writer, & cat beat & water spaniel
In an experiment made by
Both were thrown overboard a meas
ured quarter of a mile from shore, and
the cat got In frst
The cat's superior speed was not
due to her fear of the water, for she
wan one of those rare cats that go in
voluntarily. The dog was fully a» anx- {ical
! foun to reach shore as the cal, for he
“1 am glad that I live’ says one
was frantic with eagerness to get
his master who stoGd on the and.
The at in question belonged (o me
when | opened a fishing camp on 8
marsh island fn the middie of one of |
| the big salt witer oars on the south
i shore of Long Inland, She was a great,
ugly black cat, and as she had been
i born on the marsh she
{ tomed to the water from the beginning.
When she was still a tiny Kitten, ahs
need to amuse ns and cur visitors by
: lying close to the water and making
swift dabs with her claws at he lit-
| tle minnows that flashed past
Finally, one day, we were surprised
to find her standing in the water. She
had waded oul so far that only her
shoulders and head were above the
| surface and there she stood fishing
Why is Cupid a poor marksman? He |
ts always making Mrs. (misses).
For a long tine she did not move a
muscle. Then suddenly she made a
quick motion with her jeft fore claws
and backed out of the water with a
little biackfiah,
From that day on it became unnec.
essary to feed the cat. Hhe nunted for
her own food regularly and for sey-
era] years she ats absolutely nothing
i but fish, except In winter,
She became ho greedy for 8ah that
she would leap into boats as soon as
When is a girl like a mirror? When |
they came alongside and steal the first
Finally It
thie! from getting any of their catch
As the beach was shelving, the boats
often were anchored 200 feet out from
shore. One day | saw something move
in one of the boats and then | saw our |
black eat climb fartively out of tha
bow with a fish in her mouth She
slipped gently into the water and swam
ashore with her spoil
After that she made a regular prae~
tice of swimming out to boats until
she hecame a nuisance. Her sins wers
made worse by the fact that, aithough
she would stand in the water patient-
ly for hours waiting for a fish. ashe re-
fused absolutely io catch the white
rats with which the crevk was infest
So there was no grief among us
when a stranger ld the cat swim
across the creek one day imagined that
she was some curious sea creature and
shot her desd.--San Francisco Chron.
tole, oe
Was that all they
he could spell and
and presently |
old farm and Hts associations, and
whose progressiveness takes form in |
limitations in his own craft. He
knows that the underlying principles
In agriculture are governed by the |
{same laws on the equator as st the
poles. Haring mastered those
| however industrious snd smargetic.
for many years to come—exoupt by his
here in our geoeration, and tie simple
{snd that profound knowledge of this
that tells him that notwithstanding the
| advantages that histriining and experi.
j ence would give him, the ruccessinl
practice of tropical sgriculiurs would
may round out and perfect the initial
training they Bave had in agricaitural
schools or upon the
with which they would saanter into a
dinlog room or through an open gate
| there 1s » Bghiing chance of success,
thousand dollars that they now seek
read to say, the easiest channels In
facurring the almost certain disaster
he plunge in medias res and flounder
Training Attempts 16 Farm in Our
Island Archipelago is Taking Des
perats Chances—Where to Study. +
_ The farming community in the older |
“Good by, mother! Bs ware and come |
United States constitutes, it | may be
pardoned the usa of a seeming para |
a conservativeprogresiive Ble
tism finds exp m in clinging to the
adopting with alacrity every scientific
or practical device that facilitates
He bas, and perhaps truly, been |
charged ax of laggard intuitions, and
of slow, sven dense, perceptions: tut
none galnsay that he is very sure and |
apt to arrive at very correct conclu.
sions whether his mental processes be
of the hare ar tortoise order. sus
are emphasized by the fact that he,
better than any one else knows hisown
ples, ke siso knows that in & fale fleld,
and without fear or favor, his pros
pects of success in 8 new and untried
Beeld of tropioal agriculture would be
far brighter than those of any layman
But this American farmer has pot
yer arrived in the Philippines. and,
wores luck for as, there is little dan
gor _- he will be conapictious here
No: ho is not here, nor will he be
explanation may be found in that earl
Line tribute to his average good sense
Hmitations: to the knowledge
impose upon him the acquisition of a
pew and almost distinct profession.
In time and as he earns opon credi.
bie sources of Information of the pros
scution of large and successful farm-
ing snterprises in these parts, he will
cautiously send out his sons, not a
farmers, but as apprentices or labor
ors, upon lhese estates where they
old homestead.
Meanwhile, whilsa we lack, and will
continna to lack, the American farmer,
wo bave § very considerable number
of Americans, who proposes “Io enter”
tropical agricultnre with the same in-
souciani unconcerns and easy aplomb
sometimes distinctly ny
asked why they do not “ester” the | __
ministry, or, equally untrained, do not |
“enter” as special counsel in tigen
of panded
tion involving milllons, or into & hos
pital to perform an opersiion a>
tomy or obstetrics.
Inquiry develops the fact that a few,
A very few of these candidates for
graduation In and ths practice of trop:
of our people, whose tonserve
fad eo of mprohensive rasp of © with this
facet so generally known to wiry By
who have not outlived the old-time re
jromch “When & man hasn't brains
enongh to make a living, make & farm.
many untrained recruits in the Philp.
pines standing ready to famp Into the
realities of a calling whose technical
demnnds are far more exacting than
those in the highest lines of industrial
art, and In some respect more thas In
the professions.
; This man 1s suf generly, und for pare
poses of identification must Aeraaher
be cinesed as the “American Farmer
fu the Philippines.” W. 8, Lyow, mi
| ippine Buroau of Agriculture, Mur
oils Times.
Read What the “Learned Grocer Mas
to Say About Jt.
A package of starch?’ asked the
fatatiigent and learned grocer: and as |
be wrapped the package up he talked.
“Starch originated” he said. "in
| Manders. It was introduced foto Eog-
Ind, with the big ruff, in the tHme of
Queen Elizabeth It was lke our
starch of today. except that it was
{ tande In colors—red, yellow, green,
Vue The affect of this was to tint dell
cately the white linen to which the
starch might be applied.
“Bitore (Queen Eltiabeth's time ruf-
{ fies and roffs were made of fine Hole
lund, which required no stiffening
Then the riffs of cambric came sod
these of necessity be starched” 5
The grocer, consulting his memor
sudum book, resumed:
"It is recorded that ‘when the Queen
had ruffs made of lawn and cambdriec
for her own princely wearing there
wits toss in England could tell bow
starch them: but the Queen made spe
cial soeans for some womnen that could
starch, and Mrs. Guilbam, wife of Oh
royal CORCHIBAD, Was the first starch.
"In 1384 a Flanders woman, Vrs
Vian der Plasse, came to London and
mtablished there a school for the
tonching of starching. This school sue
The Flanders frau got rien.
} $he charged £5 a Ioweon. and an extrs
0 shillings for a recipe for the making
of starch out of wheat flour, bran and
i Toots,
*Yollow was the most fushionable
olor among the mobility. ie aut,
racing set went in for green. The Puri- "
agriculture have been born upon | BX
8 farm, and perbaps dove farm chores
ti] 12 or 15 years of age. Por thease flow phils
as they realize that they ame coping
with & man's task and a oniid's equip
ment for the undertaking.
But what can be maid of the chances
of the large remainder? of ths 5G per.
cent, made up of discharged soldiers,
disappointed miners, adventurers,
whatnots, or anybody except farmers
who could with equal hope of success
undertake the construction of & twin.
screw battleship as the equally com-
plex problems of tropical agriculture?
The truly pitiable feature of this
phase of the case is that many of this
class are nol only sincerely in earnest
but by frugality and indostry have sc. |
cumulated a few hundred or a few
to Invest in tropical agriculture, and
seek either information or advice as
to ths best cultivations io undertage
which, between the lines sdould be
which to Jose thelr hardearned sav
Where advice alone is asked, and
the adviser knows his business and is |
conscientious, he can bave bit one un
deviating reply to make:
“Go to Java, the Federated Malay
States, or Coyion, and hire out As an
apprentice or farm hand for two or
three years on some of the very many
large and well-managed farm estates,
supplement your day labor with very
night study, and then you may return
fairly well equipped to undertake trop.
fecal farming in the Philippines without
that must otherwise overtake you"
Nothing will suit the victim but that
at once in the complexities of abacs,
copra. cacan, coffee, indigo, or vanills.
Infamed with the tales of untold
wealth that sometimes are broadly ex.
posed in pewspaper columns, but not
unfrequently weil entrenched and con
cealed from view upon the farm; he
hastens to do the little he hears and
reads and this is all sufficient to win
the day.
He needs only to drop a cocoanut in
the sand or dibhle in an abaca sucker
and Mother Nature wiil do the rest
It must be conceded that at the pres
ent momont, stimulated by enormous
demand and abnormal prices, Mother |
ingston. Mont,
i horns of the elk—more properiy caied
Nature, 80 far as these two products
The biggest wheat field in the world
in in the Argentine ;
ver 100 square miles
In lynn. ass. 24,000,000 pairs of
shoes were made las year: in Broeke
tom, 17000.000 palrs and In Haverhill
12.00.0000 pairs These three cities,
- thiersfore, turned out enough shoes to
supply one pair for two-thirds of the
. popuistion of the country,
The most widely separated points be-
tween which a telegram can be
are British Columbia acd New
land. A telegram sent from one
the other would male nearly a
cuit of the globe and would traverse
over 20,000 miles in doing so.
Joseph Powell a 13-year-old boy
who lives in New Albany, Ind. has
literally outgrown his skin. During ss
12 inches and his skin became as tight
aa a drumbead. finally bursting in sev.
eral places. The breaks are now heal
six months iiiness his beight Mmcrensed
By a law recently enacted in Rusels,
wiko creates ur causes disorder shall
be drafted into the army for a period of
from one to ihree years. ihis Is to
Peurb the rashness and fondaess for
mischief of college students, who tm
_ agine they have the privilege to ansoy
t all creation.
A fence nearly 200 feet long at Live
is made eatirely of
wiipiti. These animals like the others
of the deer family. shed their horns
once B ysar and grow new ones. The
oid horns are found in large numbers
in the forests, and are used for vari
! oss commercial purposes,
Fiery Sarcasm.
“The house is on fire'” cried the
tenor. “The audience must be dis
missed as quickly as possible”
Al right.” replied the manager.
‘Say nothing about the fire. Go out
and sing” —T-Bits,
any university or high school student