Alerted $listtlbro. (reM-l.vnun.) No, no,' f ui t Kly returned the young man. ' I did not think ihal, though I know that tlio other two partners would willingly have me ter an associate' 1 ut it fcetns to 1110, Osgood holds his share in the 'concern at a high price.' Oh no. It i n very low ono. Thero ia a clear capital of 0110 hundred and fifty thousand dollars in the busi ness at this moment ; and then think of all the standing and rood will which goes for nothing.' ' lla ! ha ! ha ! ' laughed the old man ngnm. Then Walter hashed ; and then Agnes "laughed ; and then they fniL-hed their supper. On the nest evening Walter Adams rnino in mui emit rluV n UnOll file SOiS without ppeakin agitated, and his wandering look. Ha was rale and eye? had a vacant, Walter ! 'cried A; lie?, in 'error. 1 what has happenc-.! IIo's (.-ck muttered Noau iJrouian without loukit.s; monol. 'No. r.o not sick,' n-turned the vounrnir.n darting up ; ' hut I am the victim of a miserable trifling.' ' Kit 'i l.-ow o 1 ' arked old Noal now turning h's chair. I'll tell v-.'i.' said Walter, with Frnsmodic I'ffoit. I had .-ome long en tries to rest thi- eroning, a? I remained in the counting room attar the rest had pone. Iwasstiil at work when Mr Osgood come in and putced some pa pers on niy ucsk, saying as ho J;u so ' Here. Waiter tlTcso are yours.' And then he went out Whui 1 had tin: :li cd my work, 1 ormcd the ptpcis. J fivst was a sort of inventory ot what Op'ood had owned in tho bu-iness: nnd footed un. in snuare numbers for ty-ninc thousand tight hundred and sevcuty-five doila:s. The next paper was a deed convoying ihe va.-t proper ty to me, and making mo a partner in the concern upon an equal looting with the other two ! ' 'Well,' .'aid thee!! mm, thumping his foot upon tho eavret, and keeping time with his hands, ' T. don't see any thing verv bad in thai.' ' 5ut I do,' replied Walter. ' It is cruel to triflo with tnc thus.' There was toir.ethir.g in Noah's eye again, hut he managed to get it out, and then he spoke thus : Walter Adams, when young men need to hover around my child, I be lieved they were only after my gold; aud I knew that in most casus) I was correct. I believed ko samu ot you. 1 knew nothing I "t tbo luvo of money hut emihl imd' rli'.' 1 uniim action. My heart had heeotue haid.-.ied l y it, and in v foul d.nkv :;vd. lint it wa.s for my sweet child to pour light into my htwom. to keen hoi Ho mo t thu v?ainila It wui for to imi'.o of and her the trcntL wii'? n-hom I ha loved and lo.t , pl-iio iii that It v.a.i fir but alas ! vL i occupied a Jove sre. tid to n'.y g.'ld ! my child '." njion cradim v, h- 'had the fotii.t nf a lifetime c! t ! r-y lor i "l ' that-Mie I love !: : let !, i- V palo : rd d.ine "u she pr.r.o her what I wa. ki!i .I to :d to '.ri.v fad Ai.d - hob. thor'! suiilo I i a.rt..r I h:: l i!, . i t.y.v 1 I i O'l'd ll'O ! I or, "l1 i' r.I t fl i;:,.l; ( vuv. upju n:e. bo h in CO! i hild ch'i. 1 hear! vou .1 ,n i . i ii.e Oi. i ,ut. My i to lier duly in d. And yed that Ston : i.,i.-iiy Jatlier r.tlier i ia union with f 1. o uttered a r v i tl-at f.l'..' -: You pt i.riliv."..-- 1 tuiglit o- u;,i;.c J Hear ue :; i. i., h. show vov.r ili. : ; 1 1 i-t.-L tv.-mid Uicn ilkod that ,1 , I vr; -Id v. lo nwav ai'd r'md :iv.l. ( I had i'.nnd a iiii.ii v,h- w..u).l luvo u til.l wrick l.l.o. i.i", ;t-ii wiih no liioniy. If it was so t!:t::i thai would break the last livi-ri.i Li-i.-t from my soul. 1 deloriiiiiio 1 io.-t y0 1. 1 ha I gained a :;lim;:.tiir" of li:r!:t my li.'ait h:ul licguii to ;;ij,f wiivo, -and 1 pr.iy :1 that 1 iiiiL'ht r.o' b-j i.:.' ' J. v.Tl.t to tho I -a l. fifty thousand iIo Lm night uiy mi.-.;. h!o oh! o r a 1 1 .. ' . e . 'P'.iliteiJ. on! :r. I. i: !:ot w; I .'ha . That i :-ct on always tho o'ld think my cjL'-io did It. uholl wa.-; hn: i-.t. doivu. and room was u.adc 1'ir n hi. !.'! l.ni' linrr. I came out with ihe v. iv-1: uu' :r trunk, .a, L,".i.(;l , aud the oth up. Utit tho money va. a I ta it. ,to. hifi.lv hlullt-.l in' 0 lav l.!.--'iin 1 had U in d,e ockcts, and all Vcti'vacd up ; a next day I eauied il ail lack r ,d the the hank, and ha it pui. Wi'.h a l..w ni'iio wdlicll 1 had nut disi-UiLed. Ai.d :io my ey j.ei iii.cnt ceiiimi.'ufid ; and 1 foiiml tlio lull nih. I. i. to at l:-.-t. A ve, Waller, I Ii.ivo loi.nd y.ui tho ar,ilo, tiuo man, t l.aii j.iayijil i.r. ion tool; me to yojr lioj.ie, and loved lay when yon thought mo pennilti'-s, and you took my child to your bo.v.iiii t j ;i:,t what Clod laid laa.'.u her. Ami now, my hoy, I've be;.n lining a hit of wm k ill tho dark, l'vo paid Mr. Osgood ft ty thousand clnll.irs in c ih for hi.s share in the hu.-"iio:-s, and it i.; all youis. And lotiiiu tell yon o;io thin.; more, lny boy II your two paiinis can rainc titly tho;i;;i'.d mo:o to invest, ju.-;t tell 'em you can put in five aud twenty thousand n.orc at twclvo houis' jiotico. Tell 'em oil Noah ain't juito ashoro yet. Tell 'cm ho has found a Heart a Heaut, my biy! Come here, Anes cotae herj, Walter. a: ft. ,J 011X0'. HALL, Proprietor. aims ir. r arret t, ruituhcr. Oodhlesyou both bless you as you have blessed me ' ' . . Nobodv preteuded that they had motes in the eye now, for tho occasion of the weeping was too palpable. Josh Killings says of owls : Bur 3s is God's choristers. Tew tho lion he gave majesty ; tew the elephant, strength ; tew the tox, cunning ; and tew tho tiger, deceit. P.ut tow tho lurds his pots, he gave hufy and song. And none so bleat as tnc owi. The onl is a game burd ; ho can whip anything that wears leathers after dark. lie is a wise burd, and hoots at most thiugs. -Ho is a solium burd, a cross between a justice of tho peace and a county su ncrvisor. lTo is a stiff burd. aud sits up as stiff as an exclamation mint. lie is a luxurious burd, and feeds on spring chickens. Ho is a lornr lived burd, and never was known to take death, natrally. He is a hardy burd, and grozo tousl; by bileiug. lie is an honest burd, aud shows au oneii countenance. alwuj lie is a prompt burd, and satifizo at once his outstanding bills. fie is a com fort able burd, aud aUus sleeps in leathers. Hois an attentive burd, and dur intr' the dav can alwus bo found in. lie is a festive burd, tud don't coruo home till raornin. Tho last' gal ' story that has reach. cd our cars cnn.es iioui tuo best au thority, and ia as follows : 1 Catharine,' said the lady of th house coinin!' iutc tho kitchen with an arnitul of white clothes fresh from the ironins? board " why are tho shirts and fine white skirts done up in flour utarch, all in luaiP3. too ( " There wasn't enough of tho silver- eloss.' replied the cirl. ' I gavtyou plenty, but you have not used anv : all the wh to tiarbaiaw arc done up in flour, said tho lady. i X 1 .11 .1... A usevi uy ii iuu uiuui, ' J5ut how ? there is none in any thing ? ' ' Well, if you vaa.it know, I had two lawn di cases and three whito skirts in the wash.' A humane lady in ihe western part f.fOhi", during the rit:ho contvahands tli'ther, to.;k pity on a poor, ragged boy. of a decidedly dark complexion, aud cave him a home iu her family. Afier ben:!' Ueeeintv e t.i'l.dl .Isiek ffi'.s happy, and Mon as slieli as a p. is:'! pig. IiiO gi.'O't wiili her s-usci??, woman was r r.l.,...- .,t ;nd all went on swim- inn '';-; utitii one v; the Lord's nainoin unythmst but a re verent .nantirr. Calling Jack to her, j UIIlll '!. . the proceeded to lecture liirn vpnn the enormity of tho deed, telling liin ho must certainly go to Tophct, unless ho stopped swearirg. " What kind of a place am dat ?' asked the r.ogro. " It is a lake of fire and brimstone," rcplo d tho lady. " Fiah and primstono, missus ? " " Yes, and you vill be put into it and burned forever and ever." ' I.ut poor .Tack burn ull up." " No, jou won't, you'll keep burning and never be consumed." " Hut I r;eher could kbnJ it." " You will have to feiand it," replied the woman., something at a los.; for words to inako hitu under taud hrr meatiing. Well," replied tho juvenile contra band, ' cf I can stand it 1 don't care for hell Hah nor giim-loiio uuddcr." Too Tiutrr Makks Loose. Visa went the beer throtigh tho holo from which it had driven tho peg 1 Tho matter hauimcred tho peg in tight. riz4 fi5! fizz went tho brer Ihroitgh a scam in the cask ! The master plastered the ccatu with pitch. Hang wont the beer thiough tho bang-hole all over the cellnr ! " Jt's n pity !" said the old Tlarri l, standing nearly empty, " but, if ho had hut left it a In t!o liberty ami breaming room, it wouldn't ltavo taken tho law into its own hands." Tho richer a man makes hid food, the pooer he makes his appctito. Our lives are truly nt au end when wo are beloved no lonner ; the chilli- ness of th c grave has been passed throiioh " Ah ! Pat," said a discontented hud-carrier, " don't take up this modo of life. It has too aiany ups aud dowus iu it. Virtues, liko cssoueos, loso their fragrance when exposed. They are sen. i-iiivo plants, and will not bear too fumiiiur approaches. IIow wc dicks twiiu. P IP lift ..v.n n! M US' .lltl, J,V, RID G WAY, PEXXA., SEPTEMBER CO, 1S07. CVirrespun'leni'O Rochester Democrat. Will-to-lo Vlcrpifmcn- The contrast between wealth and pov crty, exhibited so frequently in New lork, reaches even the acrtd precincts of the church. While on the one hand there are nearly 30 ward missionaries, laboring hard ou salaries of 8S00 per annum, and Cudiug it no easy matter to keep boi'y and soul together, tiiero is on tho other hand a mouicd aristocracy in the pulpit which holds its own even in tho circle ot capital. iJr. Spring oi mo brick church, is said lo bo worth $200, ytiO. lie began I ho world with nothing, but being of an economical turn he laid by a portion cf his salary and made some good investments. Tho doctor enjoyed tho friendship and patronage ot bhep. herd Knapp, President ot tho Mechan ics.' IJank, who is one of fliej shrewdest men in New ork. Mr, lvnapp vas a member of his flock, and gave good bus iness a lvico in ruturn for the solid ser tnonsofthe divino. As a result, Dr. Spring, iu his latter days, enjoys a for tune whose annual dividend would ex ceed the highest dreams of the clergy generally. Tho Kpiscopal cf.ergy arc well provided for, and the Lte Dr. Hcr rian left a property valued ot ?30C'U0. Drs. Highie aud Hig are both well-to-do in the world, and Dr. Taylor, of Grace Church, is fully able to keep the wolf from the door. Among the Dutch body old lr. Dewit may be referred to as pay ing a tax on an income of S? 12,000. lie owes the house he occupies, and he got rich out of the peaceful accumulation of his forty years pastorate. Another one of the rich divine3 is Dr. Vermilyc. al so of tho Dutch order. Tho Vermilycs arc a wealthy family, whose history is thus given : Many years ago there was a sestoa or that name who attended s little Dutch church in Vandewatcr St Ho had several bright sons, ono of whom ho contrived to educate for the ministry The others became business men. One of them got to he a wealthy cashier of a bank, and another succeeded as a bioker and made a half million. The. clerical member of the houso waa put in on op, ulcnt pulpit, and with tho aid and ad vice of his brothers, has so improved his opportunities that ho isnow reckoned the r'udiest clergyman iu the city. All of these men are D. D.'s, a title which iu this caso scons very appropriate, since it may stand fur " tiollais," " dollars." Other clcrgvmon arc jetting rich. Ik'cchcr is now better off than most of his wealthy congregation, and Chapiu is jnal:ing uKtiry l,y lecturing at ii b per night, in aoihtioa to fci,!.'''0 per amum :or ins juot service-', l'r. xeilovra ).: iinoti.tr v ealtliy ilivmo, c i ti:o l.jittanan order, while Dr. t'yn g and Dr. Adams arc alio rich. Job Bodgo-O'iiio Sto.njy Vij. Jtwis a haii-(!iii'..,ii! '. hait-stormv day in tho middle rf N-.ivemhcr just such a day as puts nervous people in a bad humor with themselves aud every body olso. Joh Dodge sat broodingover the lio imiuodiatt-ly after breakfast. His wife addressed hiiu as follows: 'Job, cau't you mend that front door lulch to day ? ' ' No,' was the answer. Well, can't you mend tho handle the watcr pr.il?' 'No.' Well, can't vou fix o handle to the mop i1 ' NoV 4 Well can't you put up some pins for tho ciothos in our chamber ? ' ' No.' ' Well, can't you fix that north window, so that tho rain and snow won't drive ia ? ' ' No no no ! ' answered tho husband .sharply. Ho then took his hat, and was on the point ot leaving the bouse, when his wife knowing chat he was go. in? to tl o tavern, ..here lie would meet ;ohio ol his wot ay opipaainns. c.ked loin kindly lo stop a moment, faiic -.! then got her bonnet and clouk, and said to hot husband. ' You nru going to tho tavern; with your leave I v. iil go with you.' 'J'ho hii.-Land stared. ' Yes,' said tlw wife ; ' 1 u,r.y as well go aj you ; if vou tiOMid wa-lethe day, and tipple at ihe tavern, why shall not I do thu same?' Job felt thu reproof. Ho shut the door, hiiu"- on its hat I'ofr. o i t nails: did all Ins L'tic too nainuier anu wile had reouostcd, and sat down by his tire at night, a bet ter aud Ii.ippier man. A (icrmau, ntuncd Win. Kaseinan, recently died in r;ohamokin township, Northumberland county, age 1 107 years I month and 22 days. Daniel Steokct, of Hath, Lehigh county, is 100 years old, iu good hoalth, (hough blind, liar nard liiscnhtith, who died in this eoau. ty last year, was 1 1 1 years old. Mrs. Kiehtirds, near Tueker'on Station, on the I'hilaloiphia and Head ing roud, iittemptod to kiudlo a tire iu ihe bal.e ovoii by poining coul oil from a can ou some coals' when tho can cx p'oded, setting her clothes ou Sre, aud she was burned to death. The Washington Chronicle remarks that, " from the Atlantic to the Pacific, ivo hear but ono voico from tho loyal people, nud that is, that tho hero of Yi.kslurg and Appomattox shall bo su'tainod against Presidential usurpa tions." A r P s i e n r t p i z v. e 1 . ! mmw ft . Cofl mrd (irmuhltr. The following will bear re publishing occasionally :-- Some time ago there lived in lldin burir.li a well known grumbler, named Sandv Dlaek, whoso often recurring fits of spfecn or indigestion produced some aniu.-iieg scenes of senseless irritability, wlucu were highly relished by all ex. cept the brute 'b good, patient little wife. One morning Sandy roso bout on a quancl. Tho baddies and eggs were cxcclk-i t.. aouo to a turn, ana iia.t Docn ordered by himself the previous even- mg j aud breakfast pafsc-d without the looked for eauro of compliant.- " hat will you uavo for dinner, faudy ?" said Mrs. Clack. " A cluckcn, madam, said lilacli. " Koast or boiled ? ' asked the wife. " Confound it, madam, if you had Icon a good and considerate wife, you would have kuowu before this what 1 l.kcd," growled Sundv, and, slamming the door behind Lim, left tho house. It was iu the spring, and a friend who was present hoard tho little wife say. " bandy s bent on a disturbance to day I shall not please him, do what I can." The dinner-time came, and Sandy and his friend sat down to dinner ; the fish was eaten iu silence, and, on raising tho cover ot tho msh before nun, in a towenii" passion he called out, " Boiled chicken ! I hate it, madam. A chicken boiled is a chicken spoiled." Immediately the cover was raised from another chicken, roasted to a turn. " Madam, I won t eat roast chicken, roared Bandy : " vou kuow how it should have been cooked 1 " At that instaut a broiled chicken, with mushrooms, was placed ou the table. " Without erecn peas ! " roared the grumbler. " Here they are, dear," said Mrs.U " How dare you spcud my money in that way I " " Thev were a present," said the wife, interrupting him. Itiaiua: from his chair Led rushing from the room, amid a roar of laughter from his friend, ho clenched his fist and shouted " IIow daro you receive present without my leave '( " Exciting Scono ia a Kew York Court While the examination of Dan Nobl tho prisoner io the Royal Insurance bond robbery caso, was proceeding at tho tombs on Monday before Judgo Ilogan, a bCeuo occurred which for several nun utcs created the greatest sensation. A M13. Gilchrist '.va-; oa tho witue-,.? stand and was undergoing a cross examination with regard to her former husband John Kecr.e, who Ihe witness testifavl was dead. She ai 1 he was her second husband, and had jn.-t. t'mit'iod roluliu tl:c cireum.Vuiucei of their marriage, and tho subsc'iuciit Jcalli cf hrr husband when the counsel, :;!aueintr towards the door of aa ante. room, called 'John Keeno !' aud tho man (or the "host, tho wUnssi told the truth) walked forth The epinode caused tho w itness to shrink back aud aimcst faint. As Eoon as the cxeitetiiunt was over tho examination went oa, tho witness to.tlftin;: she had not seen hor hn.band for twelvo yeais and Lappet! Iiim to bo doud. A'. Y. Worl I. A Trench reputation impede author tin ling his i by tho hostility of the critics, rc iolvod to adopt a littla wraiegj to as-ist, torn in gaming lame and money in spito ofhis encmits. lie drc-Eed him'elf i:i a workmanship a! lire, and r . tired to a di-tant part of th province whera l.c took loadings at larrmr's she;-., in which he did a ht l work every day at the forgo aud anvil, lint the greater part of his timo was S'.:e:'':t'y d -v'ed to tli3 composition of three lai gc volumes of poetry and essays which ho published as the works of a journryriati blacksmith. Tho trick succeeded all Franco was iu amaze ment. The poems of this " child of nature," this " untutored genius," as he was row called, were "immediatedly praised by the ciitic?, and were soon purchased by everybody. Tho harmless deceit filled the poc!;et of tho poor poet, who laughed to sec critics writing in. cessant pruiso cn nn author whoso every former cfl'ott they inado a poiut of nbus ing. An old miser, who wn3 noted for sclf deniiil, was ono day nsked why he was so thin. " T do not know," said the miser, " I have tried various means cf Retting fat, but wilhont success." "Have you triud vituals t" inquired the friend. A boy's idea of pulling a tooth ; The doctor hucbed on to tnc, pulled his best, and ju.it before ho kiliuil nio tho tooth came out. Philosophers say that shutting tho eyes makes hearing nioro complete. This may account for tho numerous eloaod eves at churoh on Sundays. Tho largest room in tLa w;i'd thg rcoia for improvement. km v j r4 i.. A P-i1 VOLUME SEYEX-XUMBER 20. TERMS lbO PER A XX CM. Josh JtUlinzti ; iiotigs. Josh TJillinos relates his first expe. rience with tho gong tluisly : I never can eradicate huh Irom mi memory t he souud ov the furst gong I ever hoard. I was bitting ou the front step ov a tav ern in tho oiiy ov IJnfLiio, pensively niokiu. The sun was goin to bed, aud the hcvins for an hour was blushiu at tho performance. The Ery Kanal with its golden waters, was ou its way to Al bany, nnd I was pcruin the lino botes a flotiu by, and tlnukin ov Italy (where I use lo liv) and her gondolers and gal. lu.s wiiutuing. My entire solo was as if were, in a swet. I wanted to kiime, I felt grate, I astiu-:y grew, there arc IhiDgs in this life tu big tu be trifled with : thcro are times wheu a man brakes luco for hisself, when he sees sperret3, when he kin almost tuch the uiunc, aud feels as tuo he kud nil both hands with tho stars ov heviu, and al- mos swurc l.c was a o ins president. That's what ailed nio. But the korso ov tru luvo never did run smooth, (this is chakspcr s opiuyon too.) Just as I was duin my best dumincr, dunimer pat, bang, teller, crash, roar, ram duni mer, dutunier, whang, rip, rare, rally, dtitniucr, duunner, dum with a trente'i- iusiunip I struck the center ov the sidewalk with auuthcr I kleared the gutter aud with auuthcr I stood in the middle ov the street snottiu like an In dian pony at a band of music. I gazed in wild despair at the tavern stand, mi hart swell up big as a out door oven, mi teech was as luce as a string of bodes. I thought all ov the crockery in the tav. em bad fell down, I thought ov Gabriel and his horn. I was iist on the pint of thingin ov somethin olso when the land lord kuni out of the front stupo ov the tavern, holden by a string the bottom ov an old brass kittle. He kawlcd me gently with his hand. I went slola ond slola up to him, ho kanimed my feres, he said it was a gong. 1 saw the cus sed thinjr, ho said supper was reddy, he told me ef I wud have black or gri tee, and I axed him I wud. PkettT Good. We heard of a pret ty good -joke which occurred recently uot a thousand miles lrom this city. A wag of the incoirigiblo school a regu lar cus in fact was sitting in a compa ny of gentlemen, one of whom was a lawyer of no moan reputation. The wag, talking to auother individual, but talking for the ear of tho lawyer afore said, stated that ho desired the service of a good lawyer, that he had an impor tant case, out of which, if successful, as ho could uot fail to be, if the caso was properly managed, a goad thing could be lealized for himself and a good fee made to the lawyer. At this point the legal gentleman iu q':estii.ii put in : ' What's that you say in need cf a lawyer good case paying foe ? The law is my profession-state your case.' Wag--' My case is undoubtedly an ex. cclletit one, and I aai wiiiing to pay a mo.-.t liberal contingent f'co-I can't aiLrd any fee certain. I will give you one half of the amount if you succeed-which is five hundred dollars. Do you under take?' Lawyer ' I do ; state your case.' Wag ' I want you to borrow five hundred dollars for me and wc will di vida it.' Exit wag, with a ponderous boot in Jangeious proximity to his coat tail. When Dr. Johnson as!:d the wid ow Porter to l.c his wife, he told her candidly that he was of mean extrac tion, that he had no money, and that he had an unc'o hanged. The widow ro .I..., . ... .. piieu mat suo carta notiung P)r Ms pa rentage, that sho had no money herself, and though sho hr.d not a relative, hang ed she IiaJT.it j who deserved hanging. So they made a match of it. Nothing liko love and hunger to drive a man mad cr make him happy. Next to a feast i:pon a soventcen year old pair of sweet lips under grape vines by mooiili;:ht, is a foray upou a platter of cold beans after fishing for suckers all day. Tho ono the poetic heait and the other an empty 6tomuo.ii. A mother admonishing her pon, a hd cf some eleven years of age, told him that she should nnvr d ..for until to morrow what ho could d i to day. The child replied : ' Then moth.T !oti c ;t all tho plum pudding to.u'ght,.' ' My dear,' said a husband to his nffootionato belter half, after a little squbble, ' you'll certainly Dfiver be per mitted tu go to heaven.' ' Why not '( ' ' Pceauso you will bo wanted as a tor mentor below' ' A Scotchman asked tn Irishman ' Why are f'arthiugs coined in England' Pat's answer was, ' Togivo Scotch men tin opportunity to suhsciil e to eharitab! institutions. -Queen Victoria " popped the fjUes- tlOU 10 l lljtl) do likcviit. Albci .aJicS aud f I'Vf fi a ( ou! Sewn. In order to load the coal boats on tho Lehigh Canal a short but steep inclined piano of about ono hundred and fii'ly feet in length is made at the chute w hioii 111113 from a station house on tho side of the mountain to a large circular invol ving screen ; to the loaded car is attach ed a ropo which draws up nn, empty far, and, arriving at the screen, the hrnr end of the car is suddenly unbolted, and the coal is shot with great velocity into a hopper ; this conveys it directly i ito a screen, which has three long oliriaber", throiu-h which coal of as many size- h riddled cut, r.ud shot by scuppers into jx-l as luat-y boats, waiting for d.'ii'wvnt descriptions of the article. A few weeks since a Yankee of tho genuine breed, quite impiisitivo but more verdant than a Yankee should I o, giinod tho station house and gazed w'.iii wonder at the contrivances. Ho pn :'! ularly admired the swiftness with whiol. loaded car descended aud en its load, and tho vclojity with which ir. returned to give place to another. Shortly his cttonttoa was attract : 1 ' y spoil. o- n l:.li-irrr Inrnmf rmn r.f lli. -' ' cars about to make the descent. 'loitig to slide" in'rpiircd ho. ' Yes going to chute ; won't yo-i ? ' ' Waal, I guess I'll stop a bit and t-eo yon do it. The car swiltiy descended, nnd ci ? it reached t lie hopper tuo laborer jumot.U off safth'. ' Do you do that often ? ' inquired ho of one of the laborers iu ihe shed. Oh, ye.-,' continued tho man with a waggish answer; 'you know all of tho boatmen arc single men, and as they of ten have orders tor Jamily ron', wc al ways send down, a married man with every car or that kind to let tnciii know. ' Waal, now, du tell.' uttered tlo Eastern man. The more the Yankee looked at tho apparatus the more uid he become con vinced that it would bo a great tiling to go down the steep in that way some thing that he could toll to hum. Plucking up courage ho approached the superintendent. ' That beats slcddiug down hill, don't it 1 Y'oa couldu't let a feller down, could you ? ' ' Oh, yes, I'm rcconed considerable of a jumper. I once jumped off a hay mow thirty feet high, and it made tuo so supple that I'm give in to bo tho best dancer in the whole township.' ' Well, get on and take caro of your self. Suddenly the car moved off, and our friend found tho speed so fearful nud the declivity so great that ho was forced to stoop down and grasp the Bide of tho vehicle for support. Tho place where tho laborer leaped off was reached, but the Yaukec was not in a position to jump ; ho had to hold on, aud running down a descent three times as steep as that which ho hid come, with a sudden click out shot the bolt, and with a vio lent force out went tho contents, Yran kee included, into the hopper. ' Murder ! got me out ! stop tho con. earn !' shouted ou;- hero as he felt him self sliding down the hopper into tho cylinder. ' Murder ! stop the conearn I'll be killed:' Dut the motive of ' tho conearn ' w is water, which has no sym pathy with thnt'o v.-ho pursue knowledge undei diiaeuitus, ami those who saw him were too distant and too much co'ivuls. ed with laughter to render any assistance. Into the screen he siiu, landing on the top ; and as he felt himself revolving with the coal he grarmad the wires in desperation to prevent himself from be ing tolled to the bottom. Around tho wheel ho went, and our friend's sensi. bilities were touched up by a pleutiful shower of line coal dust riddled through from all the chambers. lie managed lo get ono eye onencd. end saw with delight, that tho cylinder was ou'y about leu fjot in length, and he lorced his way forward with desper ation, but it was not altogether success ful , another icvolulion of the wheel had yet to bo home, and tho next time ho reached tho bottom ho was shot out of ihe scupper into the bout beneath. To tho screams ol la htcr with v.h'eh hi t advent was hailc word, but gettiog chief robbed the and .survey h:g hi.; our hero said not a uot a:i old haudker. Just out of bis eyes, tern apparel and bruis. i'.t. h.ifrnr.i.l (.-pr.tr.l iad and cut ihtib?!, ho 1 raised his vein to know as. to what quality of .' ..(.v'.v he had been de livered, when, smashing his remnant of a hat over his eyes, ho stamped off, mut. tering, ' o;-o.'"j ,m.' srm-nrj, by thun der A patent has been taken out in Dosfon for cleaning ii-h, by giving thcin snuff wheu they sueczo their scales come off. Why is a pfUerpillarlika a buck wheat cake!1 Pecans it's tho gruli thai makes tho butter fly. Tho lladicals offered Calil.irnia it O n ham, and t he did gor'cin without mercy. Our troubles arise from tho fact hat ihe country is so deeply iu debt that it can't ' scitV As a mini drinks, ho generally grows rook less, in this case tho inoro drums the fewer surunles. 1 It is no.ioeablo that the lladi cals II light to !.,); r about the Califor nia election. Candidate.-! f.-.r " Unconsf ruction " (.'oiinrotloa: mid California. Our cuuntiy ij ter.iuing nil about Li'ju'jrii td-b-iwo-w wtit of fieri Candles days. arc ti.e iiglt ul OthcV
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers