CAVE UP BU8INES8.
So Weak He Could Not Work.
Philip Huber, 351 Cummunlpaw St.,
Jersey City, N. J., nays: "Three years
ago I was compelled to Bell my busi
ness. Kidney trouble had made me so
sick that for eight
months I was too
weak to work and al
most too miserable to
live. I began using
Doan's Kidney Pills
, at that critical pe
riod and the results
were beyond my ex
pectations. I have
bought back my business and occa
sionally work 18 hours a day without
HI effect. Doan's Kidney Pills have
made this possible and I cannot rec
ommend them too highly."
Remember the name Doan's.
For sale by all dealers. 60 cents a
box. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
Severe Punishment.
Belle And did you make her eat
her own words?
Beulah Eat 'em? I made her
Fletcherlze 'em. '
DR. MARTEL'S FEMALE PILLS.
Seventeen Year the 8tandard.
Prescribed and recommended for
Women's Ailments. A scientifically pre
pared remeC,' of proven worth. The
, result from their use Is quick and per
manent. For sale at all Drug; Stores.
May Be Wooden-Headed.
Caller -I didn't know your son was
at college. Is this bis freshman
year?
Mrs. Bunderby Oh, no, Indeed;
he's a sycamore.
SPOHN'B DISTEMPER CURE will
cure -any possible case of DI8TEMPER,
PINK EYE, and the like among homet
of all apes, and prevents all others in the
same stable from having the disease. Also
cures chicken cholera, and dog distemper.
Any good druggist can supply you, or send
to infra. 80 cents and $1.00 a bottle. Agents
wanted. Free book. Bpolm Medical Co.,
Spec. Contagious Diseases, Goshen, Ind.
Wanted a Change,
Milkman I see by the papers that
a Frenchman has Invented a new way
of transforming water Into nlllk.
Customer Well, I hope you'll adopt
It I'm getting awfully tired of the
old way.
Ancient City Modernized.
Tarsus, the ancient city in Asia Mi
nor, where the apostle Paul was born,
Is now illuminated by electricity. The
power Is taken from the Cydnus river.
There are now In Tarsus 450 electric,
street lightB and about 600 Incandes
cent lights for private use.
Old Pete's Little Joke.
Foolish questions and funny an
swers Were under discussion in the
Trenton avenue and Dauphin street
police station the other day, and after
- listening for a while to some amusing
Instances, Sergeant McCay told the
following:
"Old Pete Flood was the attendant
In the Franklin cemetery some years
ago, and it became the custom to ask
him how business was, Just to hear
his reply. It came in a heavy bass
voice:
" 'Ain't burled a living soul today.' "
Philadelphia Times.
Putting in the Time.
A gentleman was engaging gen
eral man and telling him what he
wanted him to do. "You will have to
clean the windows and the boots and
the knives and go messages, chop
wood, cut short grass, mind the horse
and pony, look after the garden and
keep the house supplied with vege
tables and do any odd job that is re
quired and if suitable you will get
ten shillings a week."
"Is there any clay In the garden?"
asked the man.
"What makes you ask that?" asked
the gentleman.
"I was thinking I could make bricks
In my spare time," said the man.
THEY GROW '
Good Humor and Cheerfulness From
Right Food and Drink.
Anything that Interferes with good
health Is apt to keep cheerfulness and
good humor In the background. . A
Washington lady found that letting
coffee alone made things bright for
her. She writes:
"Four years ago I was practically
given un by my doctor and was not ex
pected to live long. My nervous sys
tem was in a bad condition.
"But I was young and did not want
to die so I began to look about tor the
cause of my chronic trouble. I used to
have nervous spells which would ex
haust me and after each spell It would
take me days before I could sit up in a
chair.
. "I 'jecame convinced my trouble was
caused by coffee. I decided to stop it
and bought some Postum.
"The first cup, which I made accord
ing to directions, had a soothing ef
fect on my nerves and I liked the taste.
For a time I nearly lived on Postum
and ate little food besides. I am today
a healthy woman.
'"My family and relatives wonder if
I am the same person I was four years
ago, when I could do no work on ac
count of nervousness. Now I am do
ing my own housework, take care of
two babies one twenty the other two
months old. I am so busy that I hard
ly get time to write a letter, yet I do
it all with the cheerfulness and good
humor that comes from enjoying good
health.
'1 tell my friends it is to Postum I
owe my life today."
Read The Road to WeUviUe," In
pkgs. "There's a Reason."
Brer rca4 the aaava tetterf A bK
appear fraai tlM ta ! Ta
ara ireaalaa, tna, mmi tall m haaaaa
tataraat. T
A TRUE STORY of the
SECRET SERVICE
By COL. H. C. WHITLEY, Former.Chief U. S. Secret Service
URINO and
for
over ;
ten years following
our great civil war
there was an era of
counterf eltlng un
paralleled In the his
tory of our country.
The colossal crimes
perpetrated and the
reckless plunging of
criminals in those
days of demoralization appear quite
impossible at this time. A large per
centage of the bonds and currency Is
sued and put afloat by the government
were counterfeits. (
Even the United States sub-treasury
at New York accepted nearly a hun
dred thousand dollars of 7-30 counter
felt bonds from Jay Cook & Company
that could not, from their appearance,
be distinguished from the genuine.
After holding the bonds for some
time they were discovered to be dupli
cates of others that were in the treas
ury. The bonds were turned back to
Jay Cook & Co., who were compelled
to suffer the loss.
The discovery of this spurious Issue
of bonds and many finely executed
counterfeit green backs gave rise to
the rumor that the plates upon which
the genuine issues were printed had,
through the connivance of certain
government officials, been stolen out
of the printing bureau at Washington.
This story, heralded throughout the
country, caused a ripple of excitement
and was made use of by the counter
felters and sawdust, swindlers for the
purpose of Increasing their illicit traf
fic. Many people really believed that
genuine plates for printing govern
ment money were in the bands of
counterfeiters and sawdust swindlers.
Many of these were referred to me.
Through the medium, of the newspa
pers I frequently explained that the
fellows Issuing the circulars were
swindlers, but that they were not en
gaged In handling counterfeit money.
Almost every day there was brought
to my attention the news of some new
plot concocted for the purpose of rob
bing the government. One of the many
remarkable exposures of prodigious
plots for undermining our nation's
credit came to the front from Louls
vlllo. Ky. It was an affair of great
seeming importance brought to the
attention of President Grant by no
less a personage than General BenJ.
H. Hrlstow, who was at that time
United States attorney for the district
of Kentucky.
General Brlstow was a man with a
large head in which there was room
tor a great mind; but in this case, as
in many others, he seemed to lack
penetration and the deep reasoning
faculty necessary for solving mys
teries of magnitude.
General Brlstow had been ap
proached in his office at Louisville by
a tall, raw-boned Kentucklan, who in
troduced himself as Colonel Houston
King, clerk of the circuit court of El:
liott county, Ky. King made the most
astounding revelations concerning the
existence of a plot that was expected
to ruin the credit of the government
and force repudiation and general
bankruptcy. The design of the con
spirators was to flood the country
with counterfeit greenbacks and na
tional bank notes. Colonel King was
taken before Judge Blackburn, to
whom he made an affidavit setting
forth In detail the particulars of the
plot and giving the names of some of
the leaders. Among them was the
name of Frank P. Blair, a noted poli
tician. Having subscribed in a law
ful manner to the astounding state
ment made, King was permitted to go
at large, but was under the sur
veillance of Col. Alexander Hoagland,
then a special agent of the revenue
bureau and afterwards known as "The
Newsboys' Friend." ' General Brlstow
forwarded to the president documents
setting forth in full all the circum
stances attending and surrounding the
inception of the plot and the progress
It had made up to that time as related
to him ky Colonel KJng. , These docu
ments were turned over to me and I
was instructed to read everything set
forth carefully. The conclusion that I
came to and so reported was that the
man who gave this information was
seeking notoriety or making an effort
to Induce the government to pay him
a sum of money. It was quite impos
sible for me to give credence to the
unreasonable confession made by
Colonel King. I did not, therefore,
grasp the case as one affording me an
opportunity for making a reputation.
While somewhat anxious about the af
fair, the president and secretary of
the treasury were, after receiving my
report, quite willing to await further
developments. Some months later,
when Mr. Boutwell had resigned the
secretaryship and William A. Richard
son had been appointed to take his
place, I one day received a telegram
from the solicitor of the treasury re
questing me to meet him at the Fifth
Avenue hotel. New York City. In
obedience to his request I met the
solicitor at the appointed time and
place.
I was now informed that CoL Hous
ton King, accompanied by Alexander
Hoagland and a lawyer named U J.
H
A PIPE DREAM
Flllston of Greenupberg, Ky., naa re
cently arrived in Washington and
visited the secretary of the treasury
for the purpose of calling his atten
tion to the revelation previously re
ported by General Brlstow.
While Secretary Richardson was not
very much upset by King's Story, he
thought it was a case that ought to be
Investigated. Consequently Mr. Ban
field, the solicitor of the treasury, was
called into the conference and It was
determined to take the trio of Ken
tucklans to New York City, where the
work necessary for unraveling the
plot was expected to take place. This
city was then, as now, the headquar
ters for frenzied finance. King, his
lawyer and Colonel Hoagland, for the
purpose of better maintaining secrecy,
separated from the company of the
solicitor and quartered themselves at
the Metropolitan hotel. It had been
previously arranged that King should
come to meet me at the Fifth Avenue
hotel. At the appointed time he sent
up his card, upon which was written
"Col. Houston King, Elliot county, Ky."
I put the card in my pocket and told
the porter to show the gentleman up.
As the Kentucklan strode into the
room with a soldierly step and bear
ing he faced about and saluted me In
a military fashion. He seated himself
with an air of dignified Importance
and looked as though he thought him
self In the presence of a man of con
sequence. As he unfolded his won
derful tale he went ballooning way up
Into the murky sky of finance. There
was nothing small about bis talk. He
spoke of millions as though they were
but trifles and of a colossal scheme
that was a stunner In a financial way.
"What amount do you expect the
government to pay you?" I Inquired.
He said he did not want to be unrea
sonable and the payment of a million
dollars would be satisfactory to htm.
Now came my turn to assume an air
of Importance. With a voice and face
that betokened sincerity, I assured
him that the amount asked was less
than I had expected and quite little
enough for the risk he was taking, and
that I would have no hesitation In
recommending the payment of the
sum demanded. I suppose he thought
my promised recommendation equiva
lent to a million In his hands, as he
expressed himself as being well satis
fled. It was agreed that he should
again come to the solicitor's room at
the Fifth Avenue hotel at nine o'clock
on the following morning and that he
was to go out into the city and make
arrangements with certain of his fel-
low conspirators for a purchase of
$10,000 of the spurious greenbacks
which were to be paid tor in gold coin
furnished by the government. ' The
persons appearing to deliver the bogus
Btuff were to be arrested and finally
the conspirators were all to fall into
the hands of the government detec
tives. After this arrangement was
made and King had taken his de
parture from the hotel. The next
morning at the appointed hour King
put in an appearance. . I suggested
in a friendly way that he might
as well take a carriage when he
went out to meet the conspirators.
This - seemed to please him. I
called a porter and Instructed htm
to secure a carriage for the col
onel. King left with a promise to
return and meet me at four o'clock In
the afternoon at the solicitor's room.
I bad previously arranged the car
riage business and King entered a
hack and was driven away by a trusty
government detective. After the drive
King .came to meet me as agreed and
was now laboring under considerable
excitement. He declared that be
feared the conspirators had somehow
discovered that he had sold out to the
government. He thought he was ta
king a great risk, but said he was not
going to weaken. He said he had met
five of the men he wanted to see and
had planned a deal for $10,000 of the
bogus stuff. ' Matters began to look a
little serious at thin time, as It was
necessary for me, in order to carry
out the arrangements with King, to
furnish $5,000 in gold coin on the fol
lowing morning In order that the deal
might come off as planned by King. I
told him I would furnish the $5,000,
but that on account of the short no
tice I would be compelled to borrow it
temporarily from the sub-treasury.
The bag of coin, I told him, would be
under the government seal and It
would be. unnecessary to break It
open, especially as we expected to
capture It back at the moment when
we arrested the counterfeiters bring
ing their bogus stuff. When I saw
the detective who had been King's
hack driver, I learned that as he
started away from the hotel King
stuck his bead out and told htm to
drive up to High Bridge. From this
point he was driven to many other
public places. His only purpose
seemed to be to get a look at the
sightly places about the city. During
the trip King had only got out of the
carriage once, and only for the pur
pose of taking a drink. He had apoken
to no one; of this the detective was
sure. The case was now more of a
poser than ever. What on , earth waa
the Kentucky colonel up to? Was he
trying to do the government out of the
$5,000 In gold, a feat that would ap
pear Impossible to a man of sense?
Or was he trying to play a Joke on
the detectives?
The affair had now narrowed down
to a pretty close margin, but the de
nouement was not yet. Just bow It
was to end was a mystery. On the
next morning while I was waiting in
the solicitor's room at the Fifth Avenue
botel for King to show up according
to promise, who should bolt Into the
room but L. J. Flllston, King's lawyer.
He was quite out of breath and much
excited.
"There's bell to pay. They are try
ing to kill King! Here," said he,
"look at these!"
He handed me a handful of cards
with death's heads and cross bones,
words of warning and threats of death
to a traitor marked upon them.
"These," said the lawyer, "were
thrust under King's door during the
night and he is pretty nearly scared
to death."
I still had the card In my pocket
sent up by King on the occasion of
his first visit to the solicitor's room.
I pulled It out and compared the wri
ting with that upon the threatening
cards. It was plain that all had been
written by the same hand. "I will
give King government protection at
once," I informed the lawyer. Calling
a couple of officers that I had sta
tioned near, I started with them and
the lawyer to the Metropolitan hotel.
Upon ascending to the third story
and reaching Colonel King's door, we
found It locked. After some hesita
tion and parleying King opened It and
sprang back and took his seat on the
side of the bed, where be sat bolt up-
r?Ysc rocAi kmc
right with hrs hands clinched around
the back of his neck and his eyes
rolled up and staring at the celling
as though it were frescoed with
bloody daggers. Great drops of per- -spiration
were standing upon his fore
head. "I am gone up," he muttered.
"The devils are after me."
"What's this scar upon your head,
colonel?" I Inquired,
"Oh, that's where a Yankee bullet
raked me," he said.
"Look here, King, don't yon know
you are crazy?" I asked.
"Certainly I am, and one of the
most guilty men alive," he replied.
"I must take you to a safe place.
Colonel King, so come along with us."
We took him before United States
Commissioner Shields, where he made
an affidavit against himself for the
purpose of securing his entry into
Ludlow street Jail for safe keeping. I
sent for William A. Hammond, then a
noted professor of diseases of the
mind. He came, examined the colonel
and pronounced him a lunatic. It was
a lamentable affair, but nevertheless
a huge Joke upon Colonel Hoagland
and the lawyer, who bad been all this
time gallivanting a crazy man about
the country. Colonel Hoagland waa
no doubt in the affair for the sole pur
pose of rendering service to the gov
ernment, but Lawyer Flllston was un
questionably expecting a large share
of the million dollars.
(Copyright, 1S10, by W. O. Chapman)
To Put It Mildly.
"They say he has a swelled head."
"1 must admit that he seems to ap
preciate himself very much."
Constipation causes many serious die
enses. It is thoroughly cured by Dr.
Pierce's Pleasant Pellets. One a laxative,
three for cathartic.
The man who thinks more of his
pigs than he does of his wife and,
babies Is the devil's Idea of what a'
husband and father should be.
Thousands of country people know that
In time of sudden mishap or accident
Hamlins Wizard Oil is the best substi
tute for the family doctor. That ' U why
it is so often found upon the shelf.
None In 8tock.
A well-dressed woman paused la
front of the chestnut vender's stand.
"Are they wormy?" she asked.
"No, ma'am," he answered blandly.
"Did you want them with worms?"
Important to Mom era
Examine carefully every bottle of
CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
Infants and children, and see that 11
Bears the
Signature of(
In Use For Over 80 Years.
The Kind You Have Always Bought
Skied.
"How does Dobber rank as a paint
er, anyhow?" asked Wllbrab'am.
"Pretty well, I guess," said Lollerby,
"At the last exhibition they hung his
picture higher than any other In the
place." Harper' Weekly.
16 YEARS OF SKIN DISEASE
"For sixteen long years I have been
suffering with a bad case of skin dis
ease. While a child there broke out
red sore on the legs Just In baok of
my knees. It waxed from bad to worse,
and at last I saw I had a bad skin
disease. I tried many widely known
doctors In different cities but to no
satisfactory result. The plague both
ered me more In warm weather than
:n winter and being on my leg Joints
It made It Impossible for me to walk,
and I was forced to stay Indoors In the
warmest weather. My hopes of recov
ery were by this time spent. Sleepless
nights and restless days made life an
unbearable burden. At last I was
advised to try the Cutlcura remedies
Cutlcura Soap, Ointment and Pills
and I did not need more than a trial
to convince me that I was on the read
of success this time. I bought two
sets of the Cutlcura Remedies and
after these were gone I was a differ
ent man entirely. I am now the hap
piest man that there Is at least one)
true care for skin diseases. Leonard.
A. Hawtof, 11 Nostrand Ave., Brook
lyn, N .Y., July 80 and Aug. S, '09."
VERY DECEIVING".
The Preacher We tried a phono
graph choir.
The Sexton What success?
The Preacher Fine. Nobody knew
the difference till a deacon went tt
the loft to take up the collection.
MIX THIS FOR RHEUMATISM
Easily Prepared and Inexpensive an1
Really Does the Work, Says
Noted Authority.
Thousands of men and women whs
have felt the sting and torture of thai
dread disease. Rheumatism, which is
no respecter of age, persons, sex,
color or rank, will be Interested to
know that it Is one of the easiest at
fllctlons of the human body to con
quer. Medical science has proven It
not a distinct disease In Itself, but s
symptom caused by inactive kidneys.
Rheumatism Is uric acid in the blood
and other waste products of the sys
tem which should be filtered and
strained out In the form of urine. The
function of the kidneys is to sift these
poisons and acids out and keep the
blood clean and pure. The. kidneys
however, are of sponge-like substance,
the holes or pores of which will some
times, either from overwork, cold of
exposure become clogged, and falling
In their function of eliminating these
poisons from the blood, they remain
In the veins, decompose and settling
about the Joints and muscles, cause '
the untold suffering and pain of rheu
matism and backache, often producing
complications of bladder and urinary
llsease, and general weakness.
The following simple prescription la
aid to relieve the worst cases of
rheumatism because of Its direct ao
tlon upon the blood and kidneys, re
lieving, too, the most severe forms ot
bladder and urinary troubles: Fluid
Extract Dandelion, one-half ounce;
Compound Kargon, one ounce; Com
pound Syrup Sarsaparllla, three
ounces. Mix by shaking well la a bot
tle and take In teaspoonful doses after
each meal and at bedtime. The ln
gredieats can be had from any pre
scription pharmacy, and are absolutely
harmless and safe te use at any tin a.