JOY THAT BRINGS WOE Chock cf S'.iuMcn Glad Tidings at Tiiiies Turns the Brain. IT HAS DRIVEN PEOPLE MAD. Some of the 8addest Caaei of Lunaoy I Are Those Where .'he Mind la Un able to 8tand the Strain of Newa of Unexpected Good Fortune. , It Is no eiiKKi'iiilion to HHneit, mild CD nsylum doctor of long and varied experience, tliat there nro Rcores of men nnd women In Insane nsyluniH Who have literally heeii Rent .there turoii!;li excess of Joy. Jinny of these cases which nre, In my oilnion, tlio saddest of nil have uomo under my own observation. I rptnemher In the very first nsylum .Willi which I wax connected one of the patients was n ntrlklnnly liand BOine and very well educated man, ,tvlm wa: as sane as you or I except oil one point, llu was really a man of considerable wealth, lint his delusion was iluit he was a pauper, and lie (TV(!Uld tell t.'ie most pitiful tales of Ids destitution, IipxrIiik, with tears In his eyes, for a few coppers Willi which to Iniy liread. According to the story told me, ho was the only son of n wenltliy uier pcb.int. In his youth lie had fallen Among evil companions and had led purh a dissoluto life that Ids father Dot only threatened to disinherit hliu, hut forlmdo him ever to enter his lioir'e a'aln. After that he seems to have sunk Into the lowest depllw of poverty until he was Kltul to earn a few coppers hy Relllns papers or tnalches In the streets. It was at this last ntid lowest slao that news came to htm that his fa ther had died Intestate nnd that he was heir to all his vast fortune. The sudden news completely turned the Mian's brain nnd brought on bucIi a condition of excitement that bo bad to be Kent to nil asylum, nnd when he calmed down again be had lost all recollection of his good fortune, nnd toothing could shako bis delusion that !he was ou tho verge of starvntlon. Another patient lu the same nsylum was a young nnd In his lucid moments a most Intelligent fellow, whose "bruin Was turned," as the saying Is, on learn ing that be bad passed an examina tion, lie had sat for the matriculation examination at lho VulvecsitF of Lou- Mail Trains are - and ready to carry your deposit to the Pittsburgh Bank for Saving. Many depositor never visit the bank. We are heartily glad to seo all who come, and glad to receive ' by mail the business of those who can not come in person. We have depot itora in all part of the world who get FOUR PER CENT on their saving and are relieved of all worry. PITTSBURGH BANK5AVINGS 4th.AVE and 3MITHFIELD ST. PimBUKGH PA. ASSETS OVER. 16 MILLION DOLLARS Write for Booklet CM. Ths Star's Want Column ATLANTIC CITY mm SCJAPE MAY. Anglesoa, WUdwood, Holly Beach, OccanJCity, Sea'Isle City, PENNSYLVANIA RAILROAD EASTER 16-DAY EXCURSION Thursday, March 24th, 1910 Special train of Parlor Cars, Dining'Car and Coaches leaves Pittsburgh at 8.55 a. ni. and runs through to Atlantic City. $10.00 , Tickets good only M,,Wl TtekotH tioori In parlor or Sleep- t P-i-vTerSlt Mrffir inn Cars in connection with J KCynOlOSVlliC. ""Ili'il .nroner Pullinun tickets. . . VtM VWlm'SSS' " lU i XM V:Tr- ' ?T SJWfTy'wy - i EASTER SUNDAY ON THE! BOARDWALK For leaving time of trains, stop-over privileges, and full In-yjJ 3 j formation consult nearest Ticket Agent, or Tbos. K. Watt, D. y V. A toi Fourth Ave., Cor. Smlthfleld St., Pittsburgh, Poan'a. J. K. WOOD Pasers;r Ttii (Be Manager clou, ou passing which lie hau set ins heart nnd had nsked n friend In Lon don to wire the result as soon as I lie tin lues were screened at I iurl burton House. About three weeks later came a fa tal telegram, "I'.iiled sorry," which sent the young man Into the lowest depths of despair, for he was too old to sit ngaln. Not many hours later, however, enme another telegram, "I'nssed honors very sorry crush so Brent did not seo name this morning." The revulsion of feeling was so great that the student's reason gave way, and he became so violent In his ex citement that he bad to be contlned. Fortunately he was not with us long and Is now, I am glad to know, doing very well as a solicitor. Disappointed love sends many people to asylums, but It Is very seldom that success In wooing drives n man mad. It bad this strange effect, however, on ono of my Into patients. The girl ho loved bud gone out to India to keep house for her brother before ho bad screwed up bis courage to the point of proposing to her, but an offer followed by mull very quickly 'after her. Weeks ami months passed and no answer came to the Impatient lover until, after waiting two years In de spair, be became engaged to a girl who had nothing but her money bags to rei omiiiend her and for whom bo had not a particle of love. Hcarcely, how ever, was his fate sealed than he re ceived the long despaired of letter from India, accepting his offer and ex plaining that the girl's brother had re ceived and mislaid the letter, which had only just been found and had come Into her bands. Within an hour of the receipt of this letter the man was a raving maniac, nnd, although his condition is Improv ed, I doubt whether he will ever re cover his reason. In nnother remarkable case It Was the Joy at seeing her husband ngnlii that robbed a lady patient of her rea son. I lor husband was tho captain of a merchant shin which was renorted to have gone down with all hands. The widow had deeply mourned her husband for nearly a year when one day on returning from a walk she found him sitting In the drawing room as hale and robust as ever. With a shriek she fell unconscious on tho floor, nnd when she recovered her reason was gone. It seems that her husband, after floating for somo time, had been picked up by n passing "tramp" and had been landed on the west const of Africa, from which be had returned home by tho first avail able vessel. Loudon Spectator. Always Running never fails to bring results', ':; ': inmadhos I r? ' - Sr3 - : r od lu connection or - CH ' oa train teavtaa Pitta- GEO. W BOYD General Passenger Agent his 'tho.-cv:-:::;:d. A Deal the Morstmnn f,t Through oti the Ceasi C .i t. A limn knmvii i'oiiiiiImIiiiiiI hs :i lorer niJ'l iMiMswsiir I tin- i.i.r wn lately drlrlnr one of his favorite Stl'L'ds ulllllH 0 Klllllll'llllll 'VmhI Wllt'll lie enme upon anollier lioive lover, ill IIKiHt US Well UlltlWll, Willi WlIM (lllV Ill Ill the opposite dlivcMnii .''l eiiilii; !', pleased to meet each oilier. I101I1 drew up ulougslde. "I heiird only yesterday thai .VuiiM gone mvay mid hrounlit l,:n-l a nev, thoroiiBhbred." greeted the second horseman. "Yep." gleefully returned (he lirst horseman; 'I'm Just after leaving her back home while 1 give this horse 11 little spin for Ills liver." "Think she'll stilt i" asked the n Slid mail, squinting good liiimoredl.y. "Well, you know my style, old num. She fan step along lu the heat clnsa. and she's got a pedigree eclipsing any round hero."' "How long have you had her'" "Just four days," answered the' H:-iI horseman In the same gleeful time, "but I've had my eyes on her for sonic lime back." "Carried this deal through a little on lho quiet, didn't you 7" "Yp," laughed the llrat man. with a head shake of satisfaction. "Is she a record breaker V" "Sure thing; wouldn't have any other. Wall. I 111 you fellows get a glimpse or tier, ami ir you iion t aglee that I've still got my eyes for winners I'll eat the tail olT Unit horse there." Suddenly the second horseman lean ed over toward his friend and thrust out his hand In palpable earnestness. "Accept my congratulations," said he, "and also give 'em to your your thoroughbred!" ' - "I will!" heartily returned the oilier man, gripping the proffered list, "lie sure to come In nnd see us." he inMcd as Ids friend prepared to drive on. "1 know she'll be tickled to meet a friend of mine; she Isn't too high hitched for that, old inn 11. That's her Wlnnlug quality. She's a wife fit for a horse Judge!" Detroit Free I'ress. THE QUICKEST WAY. How One Might Travel 190 Miles In About Ten Minutes. It Is estimated that If all mechanical difficulties could be removed nnd sulll clent power developed the minimum time Id which passengers could be transported over the eighty-Ore miles from New York to riilladelphla would be six minutes nud forty-four seconds nnd for the 1110 miles from I'.ostoti to New Y'ork ten minutes and four sec onds. A correspondent of the Scien tific American who has been working on the problem says that the trains would have to bo run in a vacuum to prevent their being heated to Incan descence by the resistance of the air. They would have to be held In sus pension In the vacuum tube throu.'h which they traveled, for the slightest contact with the sides of the tube would result In enormous friction. The cars might be 'held In suspension by the propulsion of opposing magnets on the cars nnd on the tubes respec tively. When thus Isolated they could be propelled only by the power of magnetism. The energy consumed la propelling the cars would be compara tively low. To avoid shock or Jar the trains would travel faster and faster until one-half of the distance should be cov ered and then slow down until the destination should be reached. When the rate of acceleration Is just such as can be borne with comfort the limit Is attained. The effect on the passen gers would be a continuous pressure il;;alnst the back of the sent, as wlft'ii a car Is started suddenly, for the llrst half of the Journey, and then in order to prevent them from pitching out of tlicir seats the chairs would be turned In the opposite direction for the roi of I he journey, during which the same sensation would lie relt. At the speed nani;d the passeugers would be traveling for each half of the distance one-third as fast as they could fall through the same space un der the attraction of gravity. The Two Angel. Tho following allegory Is told among the Turks: Every man has two guardian angels, one on his right shoulder and one on bis left. lu doing good the angel on tho right shoulder notes it down -nnd sets a seal upon It, for what Is done is done forever. When evil Is com mitted the angel ou the left shoulder rr!tes It down, but he waits until mid night' before he seals It. If by that time the mnn bows bis head and says. "Gracious Allah.'I have sinned; for give me!" the angel blots out the fault, but if not be seals It at midnight, and then the nngcl on the right shoulder weeps. A Canine Feat. A blind man, guided by a large and athletic dog, went down the street the other day. Just as they turned a cor ner the blind man's dog saw a dog It knew and darted forward In a way that, threw the sightless mendicant, to the ground. He was speedily assisted to his feet, however, by a waggish passerby, who remarked that he bad heard some remarkable stories of the feats performed by dogs, but this was the first time he had ever known one to pull down the blind. 1 , Forgetful. ' ' Mistress Did you have company lasi night Mary? , Mary Only my Annt Maria, mum. Mlitress When you see her again Trill you tell her she left her tobneco pouch on the piano? Illus trated Bits. The Pip and the Clip. Too much mini e : h d dona tlm trie!:. l.iUle :hi:ui! jv.-l a l v.!:i In her sns!i and ii.'il N g.i to ,- . "I V fs !!;. '.!.v:... ! 1 aid hU top li.. 1 , ami 1 t. .' 1 (1 a v'.'.l. Ma;, tide's unifier said ii'.j nil, but the faiuil., ili., :;cau (1UI im I !;i.ov Malinle, mi: 1 :'.) v ;m qui! j s ire V.il ::.lo woubl m t l i;.!) ;':p jI!I. V!:;- fir. ill phyi l- (Ian r.n!d he vould niake It a sweel pill, but MnluiieV. 1:11 I htr rei llcd Unit so long as II was a pill It would b" 110 use. Then the fat. illy pliysl lau - was si ruck with u brilliant Idea. The pill should be craftily concealed In the cetiler of a preserved peer and sent up lo little .Maiinio to eat. An hour later .M.ilmle's mother went to see how her sweele:;t dear was going on. fi'ie appeared to be going oil excellently. "And did my pet eat all her pear?' inquired the fond mother. "Yes, uiumsle," "replied the little dar ling, "all but the nasty seed." There's many a clip 'wl::t the pear nnd the pip.-London Answers. Bituminous Coal. The lirst bituminous t.(m mined In the Uniled Slates, states the United Slates geological survey, was taken from what Is usually termed the liich ini.ud basin, 11 small nren In the south eastern purl Ion of Virginia, near the cily of lik hmond. This basin Is situ ntcd on the custom margin of the Piedmont plateau, thirteen miles above tldewaler, ou the .lames river. It lies lu (iobchland. Henrico, Powhalau and Chesterlleld counties. The coal beds tiro much dlilorlcd, and the coal Is of ralher low grade when compared with that from other districts with which It lias to come Into competition. The occurrence of ei.nl was known In the IMchmond basin as early as 1700, nnd lu I7W) shipments were made to hoiiii of the northern slate.'.. At present what Hi tic coal Is produced In this Held is for local consumption only. Scientific American. Movement cf Iccborqi. Iu the iinesligatloii of the currents round the const of Newfoundland it has been observed that there Is ut times a wide difference In the direction of the drift of Icebergs and that of the flat or pan ice, which, having no great depth, is governed In Its motions by the surface currents mid the winds, whereas the Icebergs, the larger parts of which are submerged to a great depth, follow only the movement of the ocean water as a whole and nre uninfluenced by tho winds. In conse quence a huge berg may often be seen majestically maintaining its slow advance lu opposition to the wind and across the general motion of the fields of flat lee surrounding it. The sealers often take advantage of this fact by mooring their vessels to an Iceberg In order to prevent a drift to leeward. Philadelphia Record. Hunting the Kangaroo. When brought to bay the kangaroo jumps like a flash for the hunter's chest and tries to crush it In with his fore feet. To prevent this each man wears across his breast a two or three inch thick matting. Armed with n spear, with a club attachment at the other end, they ride upon swift horses Into a herd. With the agility and equi poise of circus riders they stand erect upon their horses and use their spears and clubs. The kangaroo is able to jump clear over a horse. As tho game is bagged it Is skinned, and the skin Is stretched on the ground and pegged down to prer vent shrinkage. The flesh furnishes meat for the camp. Each man places his private mark upon his booty, and when they have 100 apiece they return back to civilization. Why He Searched. The old man had evidently dropped something lu the muddy road, and he began searching for It. In three mlu utes about thirty strangers had jolnea in the search, nnd every additional minute brought additional searchers, till at last one, bolder than the rest, plucked iij) heart and spoke: "What nre you looking for?" he In quired. ' "My friend," mumbled the old man, "I have dropped n piece of taffy can dy.". "But, great Scott," cried another of the crowd angrily, "why do you go looking for It when it will be covered with dirt?" "Because, uiy Inquisitive friend," re plied the old man, "my false teeth are sticking to that taffy." Strange Hiding Place. False teeth are occasionally used for secretive purposes. . An eecentric old lady boasts of a roof plate which con sists of two thin sheets of gold be tween which a miniature copy of her will Is inserted. In a similar munuei a dyer preserves a prescription which be declares he would not disclose for a large sum. London Mall. Envious. "Just think of It!" said the student of Immigration. "Many men who come to this country cannot write their own nuines."' VY'es," answered Mr. Piucbpenny, "and when 1 get down my check book on the first of the month 1 am Inclined to envy them." Washington Star. Fixing the Break. "They were both broken up by their separation." . . "But I understand they've effected a rcconclllat'on and nr now re-paired. " Sr. Louis 'Star. TUere is no teacher like necessity; It has been tht making of man; It wakes np'hls dormant faculties and stlmu bites to actlou his latent talents. .., HIS THAQi: DM. , A' Grim G icit Z'.oiy Hi it Come , F1...1 the Ntthclsrtcs. I lie Inb.willK ler :i:..)li:e ghost sl..., 1.; h ;; ol two l.ioili.-.s. aieniliers of 11 (lislliiKiilslict! family i 1 I'rieslaiid. a province of the cthci lauds: The young men were oHii-ors in the same regiment, urd llieir only fnint-M 1 or lain rash valor, so different from Un quiet prudence so 1 haracierlstlc ot their millou niaile iheir comi'iidcs al most Idolize them. These young ollicers were exceed ingly anxious to see a ghost and took a great deal of pains to plunge Into ull sorts of gloomy places In the hope of finding tlieui tenanted by beings from the other world. Al Inst they seemed to Hud the orthodox old castle with Its haunted room Everybody bore witness to the horrible sights and sounds nightly to be seen and heard therein, and these young gentlemen determined to puss the night there. It was Christmas eve. nnd they pro vlded themselves with a good supper nud a bottle of wlue each, a lire, lights and loaded pistols. The hours wore on. No ghost was seen: no ghostly sounds were heard. The younger brother, wrapped closely In Ids warm cloak, laid Ids head 011 the table and deliberately resigned himself lo 11 com fortable sleep. The elder brother, though exceedingly weary, determined to remain awake and await the issue of events. After awhile a noise roused him from 11 reverie Into which be bad fall en, lie raised his eyes and beheld Ha waii opening In front of his seat. Through the opening glided u tall !!; urn lu white, who signed to him to follow. The rose nnd followed the llgure through long, damp, dark pnssages till they reached a large, brilliantly light ed room where a ball was going on. Above the strains of music nnd the din of voices pierced a strange, sharp, clicking sound, like the notes of casta nets. Bewildered and duzled by this sudden- transition from darkness and si lence to this gay festive Beene, It was some moments before be could col lect his senses, but be was shocked by perceiving that these gnyly dressed la dles nnd their richly uniformed cava liers were skeletons, and the curious sound that Impressed him so strangely was the clicking of fleshless jaws! The figure at his side ordered him to take a partner from this hideous throng, which he refused to do. Irri tated ot this refusal, the figure raised his arm to strike, but the officer In stnntly leveled .at him the pistol be had continued to grasp and discharged it full In his face. With the shock and report he started to his feet. The white figure, the ball room, the fearful, ghastly dancers, all bad vanished, and he was in the room where be bad supped, but bis brother lay dying at his side. lie hod shot him In his dream and awakened only to receive his last ut terance. From that awful Christmas night be was an altered man. All the gayety had gone out of his life, all the sunshine bad faded from his days, and after a few years of una vailing anguish of remorse he found himself unable to bear the burden of bis regrets and put an end to his life. O'Connsll't Big Head. Thackeray was six feet two inches In height, and Sir II. W. Lucy says the great novelist wore a seven and five eighth inch lint, beating Dickens and John Bright by a full half inch. Mr. Gladstone's bat was of seven and three-eighth inch measurement the same as Macsulay's while Beacons field needed a full seven inch. The hat of Daniel O'Connell, however, would have beaten them all, measuring eight and one-half Inches by ten inches. Unreasonable. She I don't see why you should hes itate to marry 011 S-T.000 a year. Papa says my gowns uever cost more than that. He But, my dear, we must have something to eat. She (petulantly) Isn't that just like a man? Always thinking of his stomach. Boston Transcript. WINDSOR HOTEL W. T. Krutmker. Mrr. Midway between Broad St. ft ntlon and Reading Terminal on Kllhertst. European $1.00 per day and up. American f !.n0 ptr day and tip. Tbeonly moderate priced hotel of rep utation and consequence In' PHILADELPHIA ! 'J Picture Ha 4 fat Free If It Fails J Your Money Back if You are Not Satisfied with the Medicine We Recommend Wo nre so positive that our rem fidtf will nrrmn.nflnf.lv rcdievn con. cf mat inn ri r m fir for hnn, nhrnnin lf- . . 1 . 1 1 . rr e 1 I'.L.r iv. , viictu vuvi lu I ui 111011 u... ,.!:: 1. 1 u bllU IllUWlUUltt Ub UUI eAUKILW BHUUlfl it fail to produce satisfactory re suits. 1 It H worse than useless to at tempt to cure constipation with CJ1LIIZ1I LIO (II IIL'M. I.HXHr.IVf'H fir cathartics do much harm. They cause a reaction, irritate and weaken - the bowels and tend to make otinstipation more chrofti besides, their use becomes a habit that is dangerous. Constipation is caused by a weakness of the nerves and mus cles of tho large intestine or de scending colon. To expect per manent relief you must therefore tone up and strengthen these or gans and restore them to healthier activity. The discovery of the active prin ciple of our remedy involved tho lubor of tho world's greatest re search chemists. As an active agent it possesses the valuable qualities of the best known intes tinal tonics as well ns being par ticularly pleasant and prompt in its results. Wo want you to try Rcxall Or derlies on our recommendation. They are exceedingly pleasant to take, being eaten like candy, and are ideal for children, delicate per sons and old folks, as well as for the robust. They act directly on the nerves and muscles of the bowels. They apparently .have a neutral action on other associate organs or glands. They do not purge, cause excessive looseness nor create any inconvenience what ever. They may be taken at any time, day or night. They will positively relieve chronic or habitual constipation, if not of surgical variety, and the myriads of associate or dependent chronic ailments, if taken with regularity for a reasonable length of time. They come in two sizes of packages, 12 tablets, 10 cents; 36 tablets, 25 cents. The Rexall Store. Stoke & Felcht Drug Company. HERMAN J. HCELSCHE Eyesight Specialist. ' Glasses Scientifically Fitted. Difficult Cases Solicited. Office In Matson Block. Brookvllle, Pa. JUGHES & FLEMING. FUNERAL DIRECTORS. Main Street. Reynoldsville, Pa No Danger tf vou us the riffht araaoKne. More auto troubles can be traced to inferior Msoltne than from all other cause. Whv not enlov your machine, confident that the cower im tbere just when you need it most, Wavcrly Gasolines ' are manufactured eprealy for nutomo bile use. Try the "Wverlr brands. 76 Motor 5tove Yon may he assured of instantaneous, pow erful clean explosion, freedom Irrnn carbon deposit on sparK pities or in cylinders. Uuirx lgmuon. jism your oeaier. Waverly OU WerHs Co. Indrpcndoat Reflates t fitubtrt, r. . of President Taft FREE . If you will send two cents in stamps, we will mail you Jar?e reproduction in colors of a painting of President: Taft (two thirds of life siz s-jirable for fram ing a- f'.ttrr.ctiv- for home cr efficc. We pay 4 Compound Interest cn Savings Acrwnts cf any size, and - yog can bank by mail. Interesting booklet free upon request. Tt(oLAi(ALKV3T0MPAW (SAVINGS BANK)