JHIE LOWER VIEW rOINT.
I would not hare trusted the bee with a
i Bting,
Kor the frnnfc with fntA fni- vnnf
I would not have hidden in brake and ling
nuuer mm imtimn my levi,
"I woo Id not have bristled the hedge with
momt,
nTm nniannml th Viai-tim ra
I would not have fashioned the bullock's
, horns.
Kor riddled the night with dread.
I would not have burdened tlie sun with
t spots,
Kor ltut out the moon so nnipfclv?
, I would not set snails in the garden plots,
' Nor scatter the weeds so thickly;
Bat knowing the world is God's, not mine,
i nnry me gnui ana tne nee,
Tke adder, the buah, and the horrid kine
Jlnat wonder why God made me.
London Daily Chronicle.
1 poa-M
"Say, I got a chanct to gtt some
Way money," said Jakle Appell.
The seven Appell brothers were
eated in the office of Caesar, the fight
promoter. He was the eldest of all
the fighting Appells, while Jakle was
tie youngest.
"I'm going on the stage," Jakle
added, pompously.
"Aw, gwan. youse talk like a fish!"
touted Abie, the crack feather
weight. "They ain't none of us but
"me kin be on the stage, see? When I
eat young Bob Fltzsominons I'll be
lavin' a million offers, .'cause cham
.peens gits 'em. But you ain't 110
'bampeen."
"He's foolish," said Mlah, con
temptuously. "They been kiddin'
kin."
Jakie took on an offendpd air. He
cowled at his larger relatives, who
yed him scornfully. .
"Let him tell what It Is he's tryln'
to do," suggested Caesar, with tol
erance. "I s'pose nobody but youse guys
Snows nothin'?" bitterly demanded
Jakie. "I got a regular job at Shin
e's Eowery Theatre, beginnin' Mon
day mat'nee, an' meetin' all comers."
"He's lose his nut complete," de
clared Morris, the middleweight.
The other Appellb gazed at Jakie
tncreulously.
"Are you tryln' to kid us?" Monte
ppell inquired, " 'cause your stuff
wouldn't get a laugh In forty years.
It's punk. Where'd you get that at,
anyway?"
Jakie sullenly observed the sneer
ing taces of his relatives. He had not
removed his hat and overcoat upon
entering the office, therefore hasty
departure was easy. He got up.
"All the know-it-all Appells kin go
chase 'emselves fur all o' me!" he ex
claimed. , "Good night!"
The door noisily closed after him.
"That kid's sick, I'm afraid," said
Hiah anxiously. "You don't 'spose,
ww, that read in' about lunatics and
that has got him-bug? 'Cause that
talk he was shootln' ain't good sense."
The family, after earnest discus
sion of Jakie, decided that, angered
at not having his name in the fight
columns like his more famed broth
en, Jakie had merely endeavored to
Impress them with his own im
portance. They separated, those Indi
viduals who lived by physical combat
going to their training quarters, while
Caesar went off to sign a couple of
Men for a preliminary at his next
fistic entertainment.
It was on the next Monday night
that Maw Appell asked Paw Appell
Where Jakle had gone. With sons so
plenteous paw had not missed Jakie.
"Where, indeed, is it he has gone?"
said he. "I do not see the boy again
yet."
"He blows out wit' some guy wear
In' a big bunk of ice this afternoon."
Monte, who was not in active train
ing at the time, furnished this news.
Paw Appell remarked that if the
Kan wore diamonds it was all right.
"But no lead ones, you bet," said
the proud parent.
Jakie Appell, gloom in his young
leart, was in an unventilated dress
ing room at Shiner's Bowery Theatre,
attended by a smashed nose, little
eyed youth named Micked McGoogle.
Messrs. Appell and McGoogle were
slightly nervous, but they did not con
Jess it. Outside the theatre two red
lettered signs announced that Jakie
Appall, "champion featherweight" (of
what locality was prudently omitted),
was meeting all comers twice daily
lor three rounds.
"It s finding it," said the burlesque
show's manager enthusiastically.
"Stand these dubs off twice a day.
Well put a hurdle up for any j;uy
who looks tough game."
"And I get a hundert bucks an'
fifty per cent, of everything after
$2000 business is did on the week."
"My boy," said the manager, "I see
they can't trim you Exactly. Our
contract says if you're knocked out,
nly S25 altogether. But we don't
let you get knocked' out. So you're
safe."
Mr. McGoogle, aged seventeen, and
Jakie, who was then sixteen, consid
ered it an excellent financial deal. In
pink trunks, an American flag belt
and fighting shoes, Jakie bowed to
Sis second audience at 9.45 p. m.
The champion, of the Bronx Brick
layers' Union was his. opponent.
"Why, he ain't no feather he's a
welter," protested Kid McGoogle.
"Are you runnln' my stage or am I,
young fellar?" coldly asked the man
ager. . ,
Mr. McGoogle quieted. The brick
laying person obviously 'was not
aware that in most sets of articles the
La Blanche swing is barred. He used
ft effectively in the first round. In
the second, well sponged and fanned
t7 Mr. McGoogle, Jakie chased the
A.
amateur around the ring, punetmQna.
the trip with frequent wallops.
"Aw, mix 1t up! He's stoIHnV1
howled the gallery. "Make 'em fight t
Go git him, kid!"
They clinched.
"Can't hold'n' hit," (.rgued a voice.
"Put your head on his chin, Jakle!
Lock hold that's the boy! Good
kid!"
The bricklayer cravenly quit. It
was Jakie's fight. ,
Fifty dollars was offered to "the
man who stays three rounds." It
will be seen that Jakle had taken on
a large contract. At each show the
contestants grew huskier in size.
Kid McGoogle labored over his charge
and Jakle panted cut after the enemy
each time, putting them out one by
one. Protest was vain. The man
ager said that if no light men came
then Jakle must meet what material
was at hand.
Or no pay," he finished.
What size they'll be by Sattlday,"
moaned McGoogle tearfully.
Jakle sighed. He had not been
home since Monday, therefore he
lacked the sage advice of his six
shrewd brothers.
Saturday matinee a tall, thick box
er appeared. He was a bouncer in
a concsrt hall on the Bowery.
Gimme a ladder so's I kin reach
up to his map," cried Jakie angrily.
Well, if you lay down that let's
us out," announced the manager
coolly.
The big man couldn't find Jakle,
who ran batween his long legs, skil
fully harrying him, under Kid Me
Google's coaching. Jakie Introduced
a Graceo-Roman hold, which caused
the other to bend down to see what
he was doing, whereat Jakle hooked
him with a hard jab to the stomach.
The roars from the admiring audi
ence would have prevented the man
agement from giving a decision to the
big man in any case, but as evil living
had Induced indigestion in the boun
cer, the body blow settled him.
One show remained and Jakle could
only wait and pray. It was clear that
the treacherous manager was provid-
ng these enormous men in an effort
to save paying the Industrious Jakie.
That night a hefty two hundred
pounder climbed on the stage, to
emerge from the wings in red tights
five minutes later.
Mike O'Brien!" yelled the stage
manager.
O'Brien had a large hook nose.
Kid McGoogle, seeing him, stared in
wonder. It was Caesar Appell, who
would do anything for money. The
offer outside had tempted him.
Caesar's surprise equaled Jakie's,
but he made no sign. At the first
clinch Jakle agitatedly whispered his
story. "Knock me out in the next,"
said Caesar; "don't worry."
With a vicious right swing to the
aw Jakie sent "Mike O'Brien" to the
canvas. Unwilling and slow as the
referee's count was, he did not rise,
for Caesar would have stayed there
all night. Wild bellows applauded
Jakie, the marvelous young tiger.
At ten-thirty Jakie and Mr. Mc
Google, keeping close to Caesar's
large bulk, heard the latter demand
his little brother's money. It was
given and the percentage also, for
Caesar would not be denied. Then
he took the exhausted juvenile away.
"ext time never hold out to the
family," he gently rebuked, ""cause
them's your best friends." New
York Telegraph.
"OBLITERATIVE COLOR."
The Part It Plays in Animal Life and
Defense.
Whales, lions, wolves, deer, hares,
mice; partridges, quails, sandpipers.
larks, sparrows; frogs, snakes, fishes,
lizards, crabs; grasshoppers, slugs,
caterpillars all these animals, and
many thousand more, crawl and
crouch and swim about their business,
bunting and eluding, under cover of
this strange obliterative mask, the
smooth and perfect balance between
shades of color and degrees of illum
ination. Nature, having thus visually un
substantiated the bodies of animals,
so that if seen at all they look flat and
ghostly, does not stop there. From
solid, shaded bodies they have been
converted, as it were, into flat cards
or canvases, and, to complete the illu
sion of obliteration, pictures of the
background veritable pictures of the
more or less distant landscape have
been painted on tbesecanvases. Such,
in effect, are the elaborate markings
of field and forest birds. This is the
consummation of obliterative colora
tion; full obliterative shading in con
junction with a true picturing of such
scenes, nearer or farther, as would
appear straight beyond the animal
were it transparent, or as would ap
pear if there were no creature there
at all. The animal has vanished and
in his place stands a picture of the
distance, v.-ith Its numberless details!
The term "obliterative coloration"
truly fits the case, since these animals
prove to be colored to disappear from
view and not, as has hitherto been
supposed, to look lifeless solid ob
jects. Some writers. Indeed, have
mentioned the fact that animals bln4
into the varied ground behind them,
but all have failed to see that this
phenomenon could not exist without
the aid of some profound principle In
addition to the general resemblance
of color and pattern. From Gerald
H. Thayer's "The Concealing Colora
tion of Animals," in the Century,
Several million dollars' worth of
machinery for large modern sugar
mills has lately been purchased In
Formosa.
The average length of life of the
Icelander is a little over sixty-one
years.
Americans to Do Justice
to the Memory of the
' Author of "The Raven"
Although Admittedly the Ration's Greates
Writer, Either In Prose or Poetry. Ha Is Con
ceded to Heve Exerted a Greater Influence en
Foreign Literature Than Any Other ol Our
Writers to This Day-It Is Only on the Hun
dredth Anniversary ol His Birth In Bastoo,
January 19, That Edgar Allan Poe Is to Be
Properly Honored by His Countrymen-Exer
cises Are Now Being Planned In Boston, Phila
delphia, Baltimore and New York, Four Cities
in Which He Did Most ol His Wrltlng-The
University of Virginia, That Had the Glory ol
Graduating the Author of "The Raven." Will
Also Fittingly Observe the Natal Day ol the
Poet Who Led the Saddest Life ol Any ol the
Many Pllllul Cases Where Klsery Has Been
Wedded to Genius,
On the occasion of his centenary,
January 19- of next year, Americans
will do tardy justice to the memory of
the loftiest and most poetical, genius
the new world has yet produced
Edgar Allan Poe.
Misunderstood during all hist un
happy life, slandered after his death
by a Jealous contemporary, the
matchless poet, author of "The
Raven," is to be treated one hundred
years after his birth to spontaneous
honor at the hands of the countrymen
Whose letters he glorified.
The celebration of the hundredth
anniversary of Poe's birth has been a
favorite project of the literary for
several years. It was not without re
search that the actual date was de
termined. Poe's own statements,
which in matters of this kind were
prone to be Inexact, are responsible
for the confusion. When he entered
West Point he gave his birth inac
curately, so bb to come under the age
limit. But the researches of Profes
sor Woodberry have shown to a cer
tainty that the date is January 19,
190$, a paragraph in a Boston paper
of one month later proving it beyond
a question.
Commemorative Exercises Planned.
Boston, Philadelphia, Baltimore
and New York, the four cities in
which Poe did most of his literary
work, will all sea commomorative ex
ercises held, and in the University of
Virginia, whose most famed student
Poe is, noted giants of literature will
sound the praises of the greatest
American poet.
In all the injustice done to men of
genius the case of Poe is perhaps
without a parallel. His gifts were
undoubtedly his curse, for he never
realized anything from them but woe.
The frightful imagination that en
abled him to write stories of horror
that have never been equaled was
trouble enough for any one man, but
ordinarily they would have brought
consolation in the admiration of his
fellowmen, and financial rewards that
would have enabled the writer and
his wife to live in comfort.
'Passing Rich" on $10 Per.
When at the very summit of his
glory, as editor of the leading Amer
ican magazine, his salary was only
$10 a week, a stipend at which many
a stenographer would to-day scorn
fully turn up the nose, "The Raven,"
one of the most celebrated of all
poems, brought only S10 to the au
thor, yet to-day the original manu
script is valued at 110,000.
For a quarter of a century after the
death of this master worker in letters
the enemies of Poe had the ear of the
world. The poet was scarcely cold
In his grave before R. W. Griswold
had published bis slanderous biogra
phy, which reeked In every line with
the hatred the biographer bore the
critic who had so ruthlessly exposed
the literary weakness of, "His Poets
and Poetry of America."
Poe and Griswold were friends, but
the poet, as one of the most noted
critics in the world, could not stifle
his sense of honesty in commenting
on his (Griswold's) work. He told
what he thought about it.
Griswold had his revenge richly
after the death of the author of "The
Raven," for the close relations of the
two men, having been known to the
world, led all to believe that what
Griswold said of Foe must of neces
sity be correct. '
Great Injustice Done Him.
It was not until many friends of
Poe in life, many of those who knew
his trua life in many of the places
mentioned by Griswold as scenes of
incredible debauchery, began their
campaign to clear his memory that
the world saw the possibility that it
had done the greatest of American
literary geniuses tragic injustice.
Enemies said that be starved and
beat his wife in order to hasten her
death, so that by studying her pangs
he might get material for exact de
scription. Yet her mother, Mrs.
Clemm, who lived with the pair dur
ing their married life and who knew
how deeply the poet loved her, bore
Indignant witness to the slander of
these stories, and responded with a
hundred others in rebuttal, showing
the man's affection, the care he had
for his wife, of how be cooked her
meals in her illness, when poverty
had brought them near actual starva
tion. Mrs. Clemm showed that It was the
death of his wife that overthrew Poe's
reason and became the direct cause
of the fits of drunkenness that finally
resulted in his death..
Women who knew him spoke of
the peculiarly chlvalrlc manner in
which he treated the gentler sex, and
his man friends told of his reserve
and modesty and the unaffected hu
mility as to his own deserts as a
writer.
Poe lived and died a mystery to
himself, to bis friends and to the
world. Hts life was a romance, his
death a tragedy and his fame immor
tal. Never before has so much gen
ius been allied to such mlBery. The
most interesting and picturesque fig
ure In American literature, his
strange and romantic life possessing
an Incredible fascination- for those
who have sought to follow it from the
time the poet began bis wanderings
as a writer, it Is no wonder that the
approaching centenary has been the
occasion for reviving a renewed life
for the Poe cult.
Those w"io go back to Investigate
find that, after leaving Boston, Poe
was adopted by Mr. John Allan, of
Richmond, Va., which accounts for
the fact that, though a Northerner
born, he always had such cIobb un
derstanding of the South and sym
pathy for it.
How He Left West Point.
In 1S29, when he was twenty, Is
found his name tor the first time on
the flyleaf of a volume of poems, "Al
Aaraaf," "Tamerlane," etc. The Uni
versity of Virginia had been his alma
mater; then be went to West Point,
but the move was a mistake, and
after spending a few months there
he asked his guardian to permit him
to resign. The later peremptorily re
fusing, Poe took his own-means of
ending a regime that had become
painful to him, and by neglecting all
his studies finally got himself into
such disgrace that he was cashiered.
Thrown on his own resources, he
took up literature as a means of live
lihood, and wrote In rapid succession
his wonderful stories of mystery, of
which "Marie Roget," the "Murders
of the Rue Morgue," "The Gold Bug,"
"Black Cat,'J"Pit and the Pendulum,"
especially astonished the world. In
New York he contributed to the New
York Quarterly Review a series of
searching criticisms, then he went to
Philadelphia to assume charge of the
Gentleman'B Magazine.
His romance with Sarah Helen
Whitman is one of the most famed
chapters of his life.' He worshiped
this brilliant woman, and her loyalty
to him is proved by the vigor with
which, after his death, she hastened
to reply to every one of the Blanders
directed against his memory. Almost
alone for a long time she bore the
burden of battle against the detrac
tors of Poe, and her work 1b noT
bearing fruit in the changed attitude
of the public mind to him. .
Baltimore, in whose streets Poe
was found insensible in October,
1849, was first to publicly honor his
memory, and a statue erected there
in 1875 wa3 the first memorial to his
memory.
Other honors are certain to be the
outgrowth of the centenary, for the
United States, having finally found
Its great poet, will now proceed to
make atonement. Washington Star.
STRUCTURE OF THE BRALX.
Enormous Number of Cells and Fi-
. bres Connecting Them..
According to Dr. Edward A. Ayres
(in Harper's Monthly) the human
brain is composed of microscopic di
mensions. Each has a diameter of
from 1-1400 to 1-3000 of an inch.
Their number is variously estimated
at from 612,000,000 to 9,200,000,-
000! Even 1,000,000 is a quantity
almost beyond comprehension. Con
necting with many of the cells are
delicate fibres which extend to other
cells. Besides, there are telegraph
wires, the nerves, which run down to
or come from other parts of the body.
One set of nerves proceeds from
the skin. These are so close together
that there Is no point on the surface
of the body which can he touched
with the finest needle without send
ing a report to headquarters. To
every square foot of skin there are
about 10,000 of these "tactile" nerves,
and It is estimated that the body has
sixteen square feet of surface. Thern
are nerves also from the special sense
organs the eyes, nose and ears.
These convey their messages much
more quickly than do the nerves of
the skin. Still a third set of nerves
extends to the tips of the various
muscles and conveys the orders need
ed for the various voluntary move
ments. These are called the motor
nerves. Many of the duties per
formed by such organs as the heart
and stomach are regulated by other
nerve centres than the brain. The
subordinate centres, oalled ganglia,
work Independently of the brain. Or
dinarily a person is unconscious of
their operations and he cannot con
trol them by his will.
In the lowermost and back part of
the skull is the cerebullum or small
brain. Among its duties is making
other parts of the body co-operate
for given purpose, like keeping one's
balance. Something also has been
learned about the localities in the
larger and upper brain in which dif
ferent classes of work are performed.
Phrenologists have made rather ex
travagant and inaccurate statements
about "bumps," but, after all, there
is some truth In the later stories of
such discoveries. One way in which
the truth can be learned is to com
pare the human brain with those of
animals. It a catfish, for instance,
about half the brain is devoted to the
sense of taste. Another method is
noticing the effects of an Injury to a
brain by accident, and a third em
ploys experiments on animals while
they are chloroformed. If one part
of the brain is exposed and touched
with a delicate electric Instrument, a
certain muscle will contract. If an
other is touched another responds.
With the knowledge thus secured the
surgical profession is sometimes en
abled to perform operations on man
which would otherwise be impossible,
Penknives are tempered at 470 degrees.
Midges
' Solfatara, a semi-extinct volcano
near Fcfezuolt, has opened a new cra
ter 250 feet from the .ancient one. It
is emitting a voluminous column of
sulphurous gases. . The activity of
Solfatara always is supposed to coin
cide with the inactivity of Vesuvius,
The International Committee on
atomic weights has recently an
nounced the changes In the list of
elements for 1908. These are, with
one exception, practically the same as
those announced for 1907. The only
notable change is the addition to the
list of a new element, dysprosium,
whose atomic weight is given as
162.5.
It Is reported that a Btudent of the
Electro-Technical Institute of St. Pet
ersburg, named Freudlnberg, haB in
vented an apparatus for exploding
mines by wireless telegraphy. Nu
merous experiments already made
are said to have proved remarkably
successful. The apparatus Is also
claimed to be suited for directing
Whitehead torpedoes at long ranges.
In Denmark only the Inter-provln-clal,
the inter-communal and the in
ternational telephones are worked by
the State, while the local telephones
are worked by private limited com
panies, under concessions.
The staff of Greenwich Observatory
announce that they have discovered
an eighth satellite of Jupiter. Dur
ing an examination of photographio
plates of Jupiter, Mr. Melotte, one of
the assistant astronomers, discovered
a faint marking occupying slightly
different positions on the different
plates. The satellite has a retrograde
motion.
Remarkable expansion has taken
place. In the Indian manganese indus
try, statistics showing that while the
total quantity of manganese ore
shipped through the Kldderpore
Docks during the whole of the year
1906 was 14,587 tons, the shipments
up to the end of October last year
Amounted to 40,349 tons.- The Car
negie Steel Company, of Pittsburg,
has acquired large manganese prop
erties in India, and it is expected
that these figures will be yet further
increased.
Training a liengle.
With regard to the training of 'a
beagle, he has to be treated on quite
a different plan from the setter and
pointer. In their cases a great deal
of work of training Is to conquer nat
ural propensities, whereas with the
beagle you encourage him to go on
and do all he can in seeking and
chasing when found. Young dogs are
usually put down with an older one,
and a very few lessons suffice, It
comes as natural to a beagle to run
scent as for a terrier to kill ratB, and
if there is no apparent inclination one
lesson usually provokes It. The less
one interferes with a beagle running
a line the better for the dog, so long
as he is not pottering in one well
tested place, but casting all about
when he has lost the trail. Field
and Stream.
Olives in Carolina.
It has been the generally accepted
belief that olives were first grown in
America by the Mission Fathers, of
California, but the first olives in
America were planted on the coast of
South Carolina long before colonial
times. During the American Revolu
tion there was a ten-acre bearing
olive grove on the south Bhore of
Port Royal entrance. When the Civil
War commenced some of these trees
were living. At its close only the
stumps remained. It is supposed that
soldiers had encamped there and cut
the trees down for firewood. The
surrounding woods is said to be full
of wild olive trees, the birds having
carried the seeds from the ancient
trees. The old olive grove was on
the "Foot Point" plantation. Phila
delphia Grit.
A Cave of Nature's Jewel.
' By proclamation of the President
the Jewel Cave National Monument
has been established in the Black
Hills National Forest in South Da
kota. This formation is, in some re
spects, unique. It was explored in
1900. and consists of a series of
chambers, connected by passages and
galleries, the walls of which are en
crusted with beautiful calcite crystals.
It is situated in a canon, on a lime
stone l-lateau, 6000 feet above sea
level. It is believed to have been the
channel for the waters of a now ei
tinct geyser. Youth's Companion.
Never Bankrupt.
Have you ever been bankrupt?"
asked the counsel,
"I have not."
"Now, be careful." admonished the
lawyer. "Did you ever stop pay
ment?" "Yes."
"Ah, I thought we should get at the
truth," observed counsel, with an un
pleasant smile. "When did this sus
pension of payment occur?"
"When I had paid all I owed."
London Opinion.
In a cemetery at Middlebury, Vt.,
Is a stone erected by a widow to her
loving husband, bearing this inscrip
tion: Rest in peace until we meet
again.
The tropical seas contain a greater
percentage of salt than those of the
mors northern latitudes.
The diamond, so long the hardest
known substance, now has two rivals,
the slllclde and the deoride of titan
ium products of Herl Molssan's
electric furnace being claimed to be
as hard. , .'
- i
An incandescent lamp in Its green
shade will, when turned upward to
ward the celling, spread a soft and
pleasantly diffused light, plenty,
strong enough for a room where no
one is reading. When the lamp Is
so used no shadows are cast.
Science so far has failed to furnish
any explanation of the mystery .of
seedless fruits. They are not the out" '
come of the work of man. Man pet
petuates them; he does no more. The
seedless orange was found in a state
of seedlessness.
A Belgian engineer has been com
missioned by the committee for the
International exhibition at Brussels
in 1910 to erect a tower at Ixelles,
which will be much higher than the ,
Eiffel tower. The cost is estimated
at $240,000.
A movement has been started In
the scientific world favoring the
adoption of the word Kelvin to des
ignate the commercial unit of elec
trical energy at present known as the
kilowatt-hour, as a recognition of the
services of the, late Lord Kelvin to
electrical science.
Milking by machinery, Introduced
last year on a large diary farm near
Notlngham, Eng., has proved highly
successful. The machine is a Scotch
Invention and Is operated by a gas
engine. The entire plant is worked
by a man and a boy, who milk seven
ty cows within one and a half hours.
The proprietor says the saving in
cost of labor will pay for the ma
chine in less than two years, to say
nothing of the gain in cleanliness
compared with handwork.
Rabies is a far more common dis
ease than is generally admitted; so
that Dr. E. C. Shroeder, of the Bu
reau of Animal Industry, urges con
stant observation of dogs and their
muzzling in public places. Recent
progress has greatly lessened its ef
fects, for, since Negri's discovery in
1903 of the distinguishing mlcro-oN
ganisms in the nerve cells, the dis
ease is early recognizable, and the
Pasteur treatment is effective in cur
ing it. The mortality of sixty and
eighty per cent, in untreated bites on
hands and head has been reduced to
0.75 and 1.25 per cent.
THE DECEITFUL FARMER. 1
His Outrageous Traffic in Watered
Stock.
We might well cease our railing
at Rockefeller; the farmer is the real
monopolist. We might as well quit
hammering Harriman and cussing
Carnegie until we can squeeze tho
water out of the farm produce. For
the farmer is caught with the goods,
and science tells us the exact propor
tion of the water in his "truck."
For example, beef is 76.5 per cent,
water, mutton 75, lamb 63.9, and
pork 60.9. Such a watering of stock
Is enough to make a traction monop
olist look like a drougth in the desert.
.Milk is 77 to 88 per cent, water,
and cream 32.2 to 48, and this Is even
before it has come In contact with the
pump. Potatoes, our old reliable
spuds, are 76.7 per cent, water, yams
79.6, carrots, 85.7, cabbage 89.6, tur
nips 90, spinach 90.6, muchrooms
93.7, and cucumbers 98. What com
fort is there for a vegetarian in such
figures as these?
And even the stalwart onion, the
Goliath of the grocery, is 89.1 per
cent, water! Only a smell more than
10 per cent, of real onion!
Fruits are 85 to 90 per cent, water,
and early spring strawberries are
nearly all water, and sour water at
that! Even the great Americas hen
has seemingly been corrupted by our
modern methods, and eggs are S5.7
per cent, water.
And is this water capitalized?. Tt
It? Look at your grocery bills and
behold! At the sight of them we are
almost ready to sing a new "Marseiy
laise, to cry, "Conspuez le farmer!
A bas his watered stock!" But wd
refrain. Secretary Wilson tells Udj
that the farmer's boy insists on com
ing to the city. Let the deluded vie
tim come. Let him hasten to his un
doing. Let us send our boy out tc
run the farm, and the next genera
tion shall see our revenge! Mil wau
kee Journal.
The Real Reason.
That midsummer days are the long
est in the year is because heat ex-
panda;
that criminals weigh less than1
moral men, is because they're lighter!
fingered;
that a man swears at a dull razor,
is because the pesky thing lost its
temper first;
that roses are referred to as
"blushing," is because they are prop-l
erly ashamed of the prices they
bring;
that a wave is called a swell, is'
because it arrives at the shore in1
great style and goes away broke;
that the army of unemployed Is
not decreasing is because its members
want too many afternoons oft a week;
that the present-day aero clubs
aro considered so exclusive, is be
cause the members necessarily all
move in the upper circles. Warwick
James Price, in The Bohemian. ,