T
OLD TlH&IWmTES'
HYMN OP THE VAUDOIS.
1 By Mm. FELECf A DOnOTHEA HCKAX9 (BltOWHf).
The poem printed below yen suggested to the authoress after rending tf tne
Thanke b to God for the mountain," torn Howitt's "Book of the Seasons." The
toem ii sometimes entitled "Tue Hymn o! the Mountain Christians," ni the Vaudnis
inhabit the Swiss cnnton of Vuttd. They ere of the Protestant faith, of the aect
known a "lie Wnlilenses. whoae barbarous treatment by an army of Louie XIV. of
France in 1033 inspired Miiton'e immortal sonnet, "Avonga, U lrd. Thy Slaughtered
Saints."
For the strength of the hilli we bleat Thee,
Our God, our fathers' Uodl
Thou hat made Thy children mighty
By the touch of the mountain sod,
xbon hast fixed our ark of refuge,
Where the spoiler's foot ne'er trod;
For the strength of the lulls we blcas Thee,
Our Uod, our fathers' God I
We ere watchers of a beacon
Whose lights mint never die;
We are guardians of an altar
'Midst the silence of the sky;
The rocks yield founts of courage,
Struck forth as by Thy rod;
For the strength of the bills we bless Theo,
Our God, our fathers' God!
For the dark resounding caverns,
Where Thy still, small voice is heard;
For the strong pines of the forests.
That by Thy breath are stirred ;
For the storms on whose free pinions
Thy spirit walks abroad;
For the strength of the hills we blese The,
, Our God, our fathers' God I
Mr. Tibbets' Meteors,
' JQC it. TIBBETS was seated In
Ssi fr-w- y, bit easy chair reading, the
S JVi 2 evcnInS paper and enjoy
V r k's after-dinner cigar.
TOW Ills dinner bad been a
pood one; It had agreed with him, and
tie felt cozy, comfortable nod disputa
tious. Mr. Tibbets Is cue of those men
who feel most belligerent when we
hould expect them to feel most other
Wise. Mrs. Tibbets sat at the dining table,
'doing over" a hat according to direc
tions contained In the "Uinta for
Housekeepers' Column,"
Mr. Tibbets occasionally glanoetl at
her over the top of his paper and over
the top of his classes, seeking: ma
terial for n controversy.
At length he wriggled Impatiently,
and, removing his cigar from bis lips,
remarked:
"Bet you a dollar you dont know
how a stenm engine -works."
"Place the perforations on the Mas
Of the eighteenth flnp yes. dear, did
you speak?" Inquired Mrs. Tibbets ab
sently, looking up from a tissue paper
pattern and removing a few dozen pins
from her mouth.
"Oh, no, dear," returned Mi. Tlb
hets in tones of oily yet sarcastic
sweetness. "I wasn't speaking, I was
merely talking In my sleep. But I
hould like to remark, Mrs. T, that a
woman's mind Is content to dwell on
mall things. Here you sit fussing
over an old spring bonnet and a lot of
foolery, when you might be Improving
yourself, adding to your knowledge,
lots of ways. Hare yon any Woo what
cakes a trolley car go?"
"Now, dearest, what do you want to
read to roe? the forty-fourth perfora
tion wbat'd I do with the sels-you
know I always did Just dore on those
dear scientific things when you ex
plained them. They always seemed so
clear." .
"It's nothing." replied Mr. Tibbets,
somewhat mollified, "only I see the pa
per speaks of a magnificent shower
of meteors, the grand bl-santennla! dis
play of tbo stars from the constella
tion TJnffcorn, which is positively to oc
cur to-morrow morning at fl o'clock.
It will be n most remarkable exhibi
tion of celestial phenomena, risible
only once In two hundred years, and
. I tell you what, Mrs. T.. we ought to
thank our fortune that we were bovn
In the nick of time to witness tbls
thing. Just suppose we had lived a
hundred years ago; we never would
have bad a chance. And think of the
bulge we've got on those to be born
B hundred years hence 1"
Mr. Tibbets paused. "I should love
to see those beautiful stars, William,"
bservc4 Mrs. Tibbets meekly. "As
you say, we women do neglect our op
portunities. Can we see them from
the house? I should hate to go our. of
floors at that awful hour."
"My dear, there Is a scnttlo tn tho
roof.: Lending from a platform up to
aid scuttle Is a ladder. It will not be
necessary to go out of doors."
"But how shall we wake up that time
Of night?" inquired Mrs. Tibbets ear
nestly, "I'm sure I could never keep
wake until 3 o'clock."
"My dear, did you ever hear of such
a thing as persistent mentality? Are
you aware that the mlud never sleeps?
We will wake up because we will put
our minds on It; we will, ns It were,
set our minds to go off at three
o'clock," declared Mr. Tibbets authori
tatively. Mrs. Tibbets looked admiringly but
fioubtful.
When they had retired for the night
Mr. Tibbets became aware, after he
bad put out the light and turned over
with a sigh of solid comfort, of an
unusual noise proceeding from near the
head of the bed. He shivered, for it
Bounded like the noise made by certain
Insects, prophetic of a death In the
bouse. ....
"Kitty, my dear, do you hear that
curious noise?" he asked.
"Yes." admitted Mrs. Ttbbors, In
muffled tones.
"What can It be? It sounds as If
It was under the bed la the bed
la the pillow in my ear." . ....
, It Is the alarm clock." -I
"Alarm clock? What forr
"Why, I was afraid yon mlgtrt be
leepy and .forget to wake up, so t set
Vm alum dock, It Is xmi big, one,
The royal eng?o dnrteth
On his quarry from the heights.
And the stag that knows no master
Seeks there his wild delightat
But we, for Thy communion,
Have soaght the mountain sod;
For the strength of the hills we bless Thee,
Our God, our fathers' Godl
The banner of the chieftain.
Far, far below us waves;
The war horse of the spearman
Cannot reach our lofty caves;
The dark clouds wrap the threshold
Of freedom's last anode;
For the strength of the hills wo bless Thee,
Our God, our fathers' Godl
For the shadow of Thy prosenee,
Round our camp of rock outspread;
For the stern defiles of battle,
Bearing record of our dead:
For these snows and for the torrents,
For the free hearts' burial sod;
For the strength of the hills we blest Thee,
Our God, our fathers' God 1
with a nice loud gong, almost sure to
wake you up. I got it for a dollar
eighty-nine, and it's warranted to last
a year."
"H'm," commented Mr. Tibbets,
"and where is the delightful bargain
concealed?"
"In the bureau drawer. I thought
We could hoar it go off at three without
hearing it ticU. It's wrapped up In a
stocking."
"If It goes off much loader than It
ticks, we'll wake up, all right," ob
served Mr. Tibbets sarcastically. "I
hope you don't expect me to go to
sleep with that infernal machine play
lng ping-pong on my car drum all
night, do you?"
And Mr. Tibbets crawled wearily out
of bed and made deliberately for the
bureau. But he had iegleeted to allow
leeway lor the steamer trunk that lay
in his path. There was a sound as of
a shin-bone coming Into quick contact
with some resisting anhstnnna hi,tn.
a sharp edge. Mr. Tibbets set suddenly
uonii uu me iruiiu, seized his foot by
the heel, and hugged it to his bosom.
For a space there was no sound heard
save a seething of the breath as it was
sucked in between the teeth, closely
followed by n lone
ing scale. Afterword, in explaining tho
uintii-i- m nig T.ue, iur. Tibbets ac
counted for his temr.orary sllenco on
the ground that so many strong words
came to his mind in a hurry that his
sense of selection was temporarily
paralyzed. But it soon, returned, and
Mrs, Tibbets, who was experienced,
confessed that she bad never before
heard such a variety nnd luWncinn ne
powerful language. It was ornate and
unBiimi, onu greatly augmented Mrs.
Tibbeta topmibn of bet hue band's re
sources when reduced to extremities.
When Me. Tibbets was able to walk
he made his way cautiously to the,
bureau and.proceeded to open and rum
mage each drawer but the right one.
Ho finally secured tho clock, however,
and deposited It in the corner of the
hall furthest from the doon.
Once in tho night Mrs. Tibbets
missed him. She looked about in
alarm. Had te gone alone to see the
meteors? She cot Tin lmRtilv nmi
into the hall. A white-robed figure was
-.'merging stealthily from tho attic
stairway.
"William, you've been without me."
"I 8UDPO80 I didn't need Ton tr nntrv
it."
"Carry what?"
"The clock. What do you tbinlt I
am prowling around at this hour for
if not to get that confounded thing out
of hearing? Do you imagine I am out
here practicing a cake-waft T
Mrs. Tibbets said nothing, but re
tired. In a shont time both were
asleep.
Then titer cam a nonnfl nn -ninwn
hideous nnd clanging, .disturbing the
hallowed culet of th night Mrs.
Tibbets seized her, husband by the
urm.
"There K fcr!" she cried.
"There's what?"
"The clock. It lust went off. rMn
you hear It?"
"fo did It? Come alonn?
woman, or we'll be late." Thrusting
tueir feet Jnto their respective slip
pers, the rmlr nroceeded hnetiiv in
ward the attle stairs.
"Ma, oh, mar
The voice came from th ehnmlm r
William, Junior.
"Say, inn, that wasn't the alarm
clockj ' It was only an autoruoblle. I
think It was JImmv BloadpomTa
Devil."
Mrs. Tibbets erent nulefctv hnntr tn
bed, nnd was shortly feigning slumber.
Mr. Tibbets followed, but whether It
was on account of his sleepy condition
or bis ludlgnutlon, he again neglected
to make the necessary calculations for
the steamer trunk. There was another
collision with that obstruction, and lie
resumed a sudden seat thereon.
"O O Oh!" he moaned, as soon as
he had breath to spare; "if s tho same
one."
"The same what dearest?" tnyolncd
Mrs, Tibbets In. some alarm, ,
"Oh the same shin." ' ,
Mrs. Tibbets said no mom tor she
knew It waa best Inst then not ia ills.
turb ber husband n bis travaO.
.When um TiniMts next awofca It
was due. rto a violent shaking, of the
shoulders.'1..--"
"Hark!" whispered tr husband.
"There's burglars."
They looked at each other In alarm
and listened. Sure enough, there were
footsteps coming down the attic stairs.
But It was apparently a very careless
burglar, for there seemed to be no
attempt at stealth.
"Do hurry. William, nnd Sec what It
Is." urged Mrs. Tibbets In excitement.
Mr. Tibbets thought of pistols, sud
den death, and of the steamer trunk;
but he was valiant. He jumped out of
bed and rushed Into the hall Just ns
the door nt the foot of the attic stairs
burst open, owing to a violent Impetus
being imparted thereto by the cook,
who appeared suddenly with her arms
full of garments, her best bonnet on,
and her purse In her teeth.
"Where's the fire?" she gasped.
"Where Is It? Have we time to git out!
The saints presnrve us."
"What fire? Where's the fire?"
"Sure an didn't yes bear th alar
rum?" "Where? What alarm? The wom
an's mad."
But then a light suddenly dawned
upon him. and he said, in a some
what apologetic tone:
"Oh, Bridget, that wasn't fire
alarm. It was only our alarm clock,
you know. I set 1t for 3 o'clock, and
forgot you were sleeping In that room."
And here Mr. Tibbets, suddenly realiw
lng that bis costume was hardly adapt
ed for a lndy's reception, plunged back
Into the privacy of bis own apartment.
"Th nlnrrum clock. Is It? You fort
got. Is it? And a mighty fine time of
night It Is to be settin' an nlnrrum
clock," shouted Bridget, through the
closed door. "I'll hev ycz understand
yez'll be playin' no Jokes wld mo. An
nlnrrum clock! Bure, an' it's as loud
as a fire bell. It's to-morrow I'll be
nfther lavln', nn' I'll not go to bed In
the plnce again. An nlnrrum clock!
A-a-nh!"
And this was the passing of Bridget.
"Aren't you going to get up, Wil
liam?" Inculrcd Mrs. Tibbets as bet
husband returned to bed and burled
his head in the clothes. "You know I
set the dock on purpose, and it seems
too bad to ruin It all, now we happen
to be awnke at the right time at la8t."
Mr. Tibbets sat up, scratched his
head, nnd, remarking that a woman
never was satisfied until she had a
man miserable, proceeded to get into
his dressing gown.
"I suppose we ought to take Willie
with us," echoed Mr. Tibbets, sweetly.
"Shan't we invite the cook, too, and
make It a family party? She happened
to wake up at the right time, too, you
know."
"You had better bring a candle, too."
said Mrs. Tibbets, Ignoring his thrust.
"Certainly, by all means, a candle.
But why a candle? Let's have an elec
tric light. Let's get a searchlight. You
can see the stars so much better, you
know."
Mrs. Tibbets said nothing, but fol
lowed her husband up the stairs, drag
glng Willlanv Junior, by the hand.
Mr. Tibbets explored his wny cau
tiously up the ladder leading from the
platform under the scuttle.
"I don t see where that confounded
book Is gone to," he exclaimed testily.
"A man never can lay his hand on
anything in this house when ne
'What's tho matter, William? Did
you hurt yourself?" inquired Mrs. Tib-
beta, ns ber .husband's words were
ended in a sudden sharp- crack, fol-
Jowed by a growl. Indicating that thnt
gentleman had found the nook by
means of the crown of his head.
"Hadn't you better put out the candle
if yon want to see the rtarsT' he
hinted, as Mrs. Tibbets cautiously
poked her bend up through the scuttle
and held the candle aloft as if huntiug
for something on the top shelf of a
dark closet.
"Where are the meteors?" she asked.
In a tone of somo disappointment. "I
don't see anything but stars, and they
don't seem to be moving, I'm sure."
"Woman, you wouldn't know a me
teor If you saw one. Just have a little
pntlcnce, will you? In a minute I'll
show you more meteors than you "
But here Mr. Tibbets' remarks were
cut short, for ho had suddenly van
ished. There was a sound ot revelry,
as of ten pins being bowled over by
one large ball, and of that ball striking
the floor from an lndeflnlti dlstnnce.
'Oh. William, dear William." cried
Mrs. Tibbets hysterically, "did you
hurt your poor head? Oh, dear, are
you killed?"
And In her excitement Mrs, Tibbets
loosened her grasp on the hand of Wil
liam, Junior. There was a shriek, a
scrambling sound of a body in sudden
descent, terminated by a sudden thud,
which In turn was followed by a hol
low groan. William, Junior, had alight
ed upon the very pit and marrow of bis
father.
When Mrs. Tibbets reached the foot
of the ladder she was Just In time to
observe her husband slowly and pain
fully gather himself together, as for a
Anal effort.
"Woman." he snld. as he attempted
to straighten out a lump on the back
of bis head, "don't you ever try to drag
ma Into any tpmfoolery like this again,
do you hoar? You Just stick to your
sewing, and don't you go meddling
with things you don't understand."
"But the meteors, dear; aren t you
going to "
But Mr. Tibbets had disappeared Into
his bedroom and slammed the door.
And the rest of that night Mrs. Tib
bets slept with William, Juulor. New
York Times.
Has walked loo.oon MUm.
There Is at present living in retire
ment at Chester-le-Street, near Dur
ham, a septuagenarian workman, WU-
Horn Hewitt, who for close upon sixty
years was employed by the Blrtley Iron
and Coal Company, Mr. Hewitt walked
to and from bis work six miles dally,
or an estimated total of 100.000 mile.-TU-B1U.
,
AVE THE LOWER ANIMALS . O
, OTHER SENSES THAN OURS
Bt 4. CARTER BEARD.
F a person who could see
were to find himself In
region, the Inhabitants of
which had never known or
heard of creatures that
were not, like themselves.
blind, the use of his eyes might enable
blm to perform acts which must be In
comprehensible to them.
Imagine the bewilderment and sur
prise of these unseeing people In their
encounter with one who could describe
objects and recognise Individuals with
out contact, avoid pitfalls without as
certaining their existence by the sense
of feeling, and even announce the pres
ence of objects at a very considerable
distance.
Doubtless such sightless folk. If they
were reasoning beings, would try In
various ways to account for their vis
itor's achievement
In doing this, moved by the impulse
that leads us to measure the faculties
of others by our own limitations, they
might be Inclined to credit blm with a
development of hearing or of smelling
or of some other power exercised by
themselves In apprehending external
things, sufficiently extended to meet Die
case. The simpler and, all things con
sidered, the more probable explanation
that the performer possessed a sense
absent in themselves, might be the Inst
to occur, or, perhaps, prove acceptable
When suggested to them.
In their unwillingness to accept such
an Interpretation of the facts they
would follow many of our scientists,
who, until quite recently, have been
reluctant to admit that a number of the
lower animals possibly possess other
senses than ours. So much new and
undeniably afllrmatory evidence is,
however, now being offered on this
point thnt there enn be no longer any
substantial reason for doubting that
the five senses man Imperfectly exer
cises are by no means all that are pos
sible to sentient creatures. One such
sense not possessed by human beings,
but to a greater or less degree almost
universally present In mammals, birds,
reptiles, fish and Insects, Is what per
haps may be called the sense of locali
sation. It enables its possessor, ap
parently by its sole use, to find a de
sired spot. It Is evidently closely con
nected wltb an lnstlnctlvo and perfect
memory of distance nnd direction. That
the homing pigeon exercises It to some
extent, though undoubtedly aided bjr
the landmarks It recognizes, is indis
putable; that the honey bee bns it In
Its fulness nnd perfection cannot, after
the careful experiments of Albrecht
Betlie in Germany, bo doubted,
Perhaps as striking an Instance of Its
use as any is that related of the ringed
seal (Fhoca fnetldn), which furnishes
the Eskimo of Greenland nnd of the
Arctic archipelago with food and cloth
ing. The female seal, when about to
have young, forms for herself an igloo
or domed cavity in the snow Just above
the breathing hole which she keeps
open in the ice. Here her baby is born,
and rests, sheltered from the fierce
Arctic gales by tho roof of snow over
head, on tho ice near tbo breathing
hole. To supply herself and the little
creature with food, the mother seal has
to swim for miles through water black
as midnight without tho faintest my
of light to guide her on her way; no
light can penetrate tho strata, dozens
of feet thick, of ice and snow above.
Aided by none of the faculties we exer
cise in apprehending external . things,
but by some mysterious power, of
which we can form little or no concep
tion, she follows swift, elusive fish in
all their turnings, secures ber prey
and returns, unerringly, to .her own
particular At-luk, or breathing bole,
however distant, where her young one
awaits her.
I. H. Fabre, the celebrated French
entomologist, tried several experiments
wltb mason bees (Challcodoma pyre
nalca); results which are useful In con
firming those of Bethe on the honey
bee. nnd still further strengthening bis
position, insomuch as the mason bee Is
very different from the former, living
as it does but a short time in the
winged state, and not having opportu
nity to become acquainted with' locali
ties as distant as those to which Fa
bre carried it One of these series of
experiments made with bees, testified
very convincingly to tho fact that the
sense of sight has nothing at an to do
with the recognition of objects or of
localities by the Insects in question. A
bowlder, to which a partially finished
nest of a Challcodoma was attached,
was. during the temporary absence of
its builder, removed a short distance,
but In plain sight of the place formerly
occupied by it The bee returning,
flew quickly to the spot where she had
been carrying on her unfinished dwell
ing. Bbe then flew off, but speedily
returned, and again sought diligently
in the self-same spot for her absent
nest This she did a number of times,
occasionally passing in hor flight within
a very few inches of the object she
was in search of, without once recog
nizing it. When the nest nnd the
bowlder to which It was attached were
moved back again to within a very
short distance of the locality to which
she had always returned, the bee
would at times actually alight upon the
stoue, visit tho nest run about over
the bowlder as if to examine it and
then fly away again.
It Is evidently Its location in space
and not Its appearance that enables tbo
bee to recognize its nest Another nest
put In place of her own was adopted
by Challcodoma, without any question,
although the nests were very different
in appearance, tho ono consisting of a
single incomplete cell and the other of
many cells.
These same powers and the same lim
itations belong to this localizing sense
la yiasna. fctunbex, for iuMancs,
forms ber nest In sandbanks that ara
sometimes acres In extent. Before
leaving her burrow the Insect covers It
over with sand, masking It so complete
ly that It Is entirely Indistinguishable
from the surrounding nest On revisit
Ing the nest however, which she has to
do In storing It with food, she Dies
Without hesitation directly to it.
The little wasp (Cercerls tuberculnta)
possesses this sense In a high degree,
perhaps also another, for In choosing
the beetles with which to store the bur
rows she digs in the soil for her future
larvae, she never gets outside a partic
ular family of those insects, but, re
markable as It may appear, will take
specimens altogether different in ap
pearance, thnpe, size and color, pro
vided they belong to the right family.
The range of selection, so wide in re.
spect to varieties, so limited as to kind,
seems to point to some sense of which
we know nothing, but which supplies
Cereerls with the power of discrimina
tion required.
Fabre captured a dozen female Cer
eerls, dropped a spot of white pnlnt on
the thorax of every on, put each into
a paper roll, put tbo rolls containing
the prisoners into a bos from which
they were liberated one and a quarter
miles from home. Five hours after
ward, when he visited their home, four
had returned, and he bad little, if any,
doubt that the others also found their
way there. He afterward took nine of
the Insects to the town of Cnrpentrns,
a distance of two miles, and released
them in the public street in the centre
of a populous quarter. Each wasp, on
being relenscd, rose vertically high
enough between the houses to clear the
roofs, and flew off In a southerly direc
tion, in a becllne for her nest. On vis
iting the homes of the little wasps next
dny he found thnt at least five out of
tho nine had "put In an appearance."
But perhaps the strangest Instance of
the possession of some sense unknown
to us occurs in the case of the parasitic
wasp Leucopsls (Leucopsls glgas). Leu
copsls lays ber eggs In the cells built
by tho mason bee Challcodma. The cell
of this bee is placed In a mass of solid
masonry, a part only of which is occu
pied by cells. Every cell is built with
bard mortar, making nn uneven sur
face, nnd access is rendered even more
difficult by a layer of sun-baked clay
spread over the whole. Leucopsls has
perhaps to work uninterruptedly for
three hours with the tools nature has
furnished to penetrate the defense pro
vided by the mason boo for the egg and
food stored In the cell. But the cover
ing is uniform over tho whole struct
ure. How Is Leucopsls to know that
after all ber work may not be In vain;
that sho may not pcrietrate masonry
that covers no cell? This problem is
easily solved by the wasp, who walks
slowly and, so to speak, thoughtfully
over the clay, tests ft with her anten
nae, nnd unfailingly selects 'the right
spot to begin her work, which of course
is to obtain access to the larvae of the
mason bee, upon which her young will
feed when the egg she lay there is
batched.
It is, to make the matter piatn, ns If
a person were able to determine by
feeling of tho walls, three or four feeV
thick, of a prison. Just where cells ten
anted by the prisonere were situated.
Examples of Insects that possess an
X-ray sense, not only among European
but our own hymen opt era, can bo mul
tiplied indefinitely. Only one or two of
the senses pecullnrto the lower animals
nro here noticed. Lubbock Buggcstg
that "there may be fifty of them."
I do not know any more interesting
field for loologlcal research and experi
ment than this a field open to any one
who has the requisite patience and love
of nnturo to explore it Scientific. -mer-lean.
An UuprofltabI Trick.
"Yes, there are tricks In all trades,
but it is, Indeed, seldom that one
Is not caught practicing such tricks,"
remarked a local merchant tailor. "I
can vouch for this through personal
experience."
"Some time ago," he continued,
"when I was rushed with work one of
my best customers ordered a 143 suit.
I knew bis exact measurements, and
Instead of making the clothes myself,
sent the order to another tailor to be
made at $30, telling him that when
completed to send It to the purchaser.
I neglected, however; to tell my tailor
fricud to send the bill to me, which
mistake not only caused me to lose
the $13 clear profit but the purchas
er's trade.
"When he finished the suit, the tailor
sent It and tho bill therefor to my
customer. In duo time I sent my col
lector around with a bill of $45 for the
clothing. He wns met by my customer
who informed my emissary thut by my
little trick he had saved $15."-Wash-lugton
Star.
Champion Circulation I.lor.
The cbRmplou clrculnton liar has
hecn discovered. His lair Is In Japan,
where lis is acting as editor-in-chief
of the Thuuilcrlng Dawn, a Buddnlsl
organ Just started In Toklo. Here is
his "greeting to the public:"
"This paper has como from eternity.
It starts its circulation with millions
and millions of numbers. Th? rays of
the sun, the beams of tho stars, the
leaves of the trees, the blades of grass,
tho grains of sand, the hearts of tigers,
elephants, lions, ants, met) and women
are its subscribers. This Journal will
henceforth flow in the universe as the
rivers flow and the oceans surge,"
Any liar who can beat that can get a
small Job with a big salary in New
York. Detroit News,
A count of the unoccupied bouses
In London show 40,000. That Is ons
hous la fifteen of tbo wbols city.
Our. Budget
of Humor.;
Her Winning Smile.
Ehe had s winning smile.
It nearly had me killed,
Till Amy whispered to me,
"Her teeth have Jut bee filled."
New York Bun
Ko Jteed of Protestations.
Tom "Did sho ask you if she were
the only girl you ever loved?"
Jack "No, she took it for granted."
Somorvllle Journal.
What s nuit-pt
"And how about me bump of will
powah, professah?"
"It's a dent." New York Sun.
A Sense of Sntlsfnctlon,
"We nro one of the richest nations
on earth."
"Of courso wo nrc," answered Sen
ator Sorghum. "And I can say without
boasting thnt I have done much to help
along a few of the people who repre
sent its wealth." Washington Star.
Ills Iteason,
Bmlthklns "There's old BIfklns. I
don't care to meet htm. Let's turn this
way. Last summer I requested a loan
of $20."
Tlffkins "Well, he ought to have
obliged you; he's rich enough."
Smlthklns "The trouble Is ho did!"
Smart Set
Fiction on Fiction.
"nave you read Wiishter's new work
of fiction?"
"Not exactly."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I've only read the advance no
tices, but I suppose there is really more
fiction In them thnn there Is in the
book itself." Baltimore Herald.
Distinction Without Difference.
Mr. Jones "It Is useless my arguing
with n woman who says sho Is always
right."
Mrs. Jones "I never made any such
assertion, and it's utterly cruel and
unkind of you to say to. I did not sny
I wns always right; I simply asserted
that I was never wrong" Comfort
Not Cp to tho Predictions.
"Well, is married life all that
It is
Is painted?" asked the girl.
"Not quite," replied the bride, with
what her friend declared later she was
almost sure was a sigh.' "We've been
married three mouths now, and during
that time Jack has spent but four
evenings at tho club." Syracuse Her
ald. Shonld Bmy, But Didn't.
ne "I know your family doesn't like
me, Cut will you be my wife?"
She "Well, I should say not!"
Ho (taken aback) "Whew! that's
rather short."
Sho "I repeat, I should say not but
as a girl In love doesn't always sny
what she should, I'll say 'yes.' " Phil
adelphia Tress.
Removing tbo Causes,
"So you belong to the Don't Worry
Club?"
"I do, and I'm glad of It although
my membership compels me to take a
few chances."
"In what way?"
"I had to quit looking at the gas
meter and weighing my ice." Wash
ington Star. ,
dm no Do itr
Visitor "Sam, 1 shan't kiss you any
more if you dou't wash your face." ,
Sam "There you go again, putting
temptations In a man's path. It's hurd
enough to keep clean as It is." Now
York Sun.
Bis First Pair of Trousers,
Ono cold day, little Tom, in bis first
trousers, was walking out with bis tiny
overcoat turned back to its utmost
limit when bis father said to blm;
"Tom, button your coatl"
Tom hesitated awhile. .v
"Look at mine," added his father. '
"Yes," said Tom, ruefully, "but
everybody knows that you wear
trousers."
mWMl
WUolNESa CAHOS,
ri M. MoDONALD,
1 9
ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, ,
Notary Pnblts. real satsts stent, Pstmij.
secured, collections made promptly. Ows3
In Nolan block, Heynoldarllfe, Pa
gMITH M. MoCRKIOHT, T
ATTORNEY-AT-LAT.
ftotarT Public end Real Estate A (ens, Oats
actions will rj.:ele prompt attention. OfllaO
Ip rroehltrb A Henry block, asar poatofnoe.
Benpldllle Pa,
JR. B. E. HOOVER,
REYNOLDS VILLE, PA.
Resident dentist, tn the Bootm tmnstaa
Best door to postoflce. Main etreet,0eallel
oese in operating.
JJR. L. L, MEANS,
DENTIST,
. Office on second floor of First National kaak
ulldlnc. Main street.
J)R. a DaVERffi KINO,
. DENTIST,
Office oa second floor KeynoldsTtlla Rm4
Estate Bldg. Mala street BejrnoldsTHle. Pa.
JR. A. HENRY, "
DENTIST,
. Office oo second floor of Bears iiiroa. trtak
buildlna, Main street.
5J NEiT. '
JUSTICE 0? THE PEACE
And Real Estate A. (tut, BeyMldsrlUa, Pa.
LA BOB WORLD.
There are 750 trades unions in Iowa
With a total membership of 75,000.
There are nearly 050,000 women
dressmakers In the United Kingdom.
Kansas needs nt least 25,000 men
and 4000 tenms for the wheat harvest
Massachusetts In 1800 was the first
State to establish a bureau of Inbor
statistics.
Union Iron molders nt Dnyton, Ohio,
have received an Increase In wages of
Uve pur cent.
Farm laborers in Montann have
formed a union nnd demand $2.50 a
day of nlno hours.
Telephone linemen nt Alexandria,
Ind., have received an Increase of
twenty-five cents a day.
Quarrymen nt San Frnnelsco, Cnl.,
will receive nn Increase of twenty-five
cents a day on September I.
Carpenters in Anstnn work ten to
eleven hours a dny for nn average
weekly wage amounting to $4 nnd ?5.
Unskilled employes of the pncklng
bouses In Omnha, Neb., numbering
over 21,000, have been given increased
wages.
Harness makers In the Birmingham
(Eng.) district have refused to submit,
their demand for Increased pay to arbi
tration. Strikers In two of the big shoe shops
at Broekton, Mass., won most of the
demands they made, others being sub
mitted to arbitration.
Iron workers employed on Stnte con
tracts in Holland are pntd eight cents
an hour, about one-fifth of the rate
paid in this country.
Carpenters nt Wheeling, W. Va., nf
tcr n six weeks' strike, hnve been
granted their demand for an eight-hour
day with no Increase In pay.
The longest strike on record Is not
yet ended. Tim 2800 men and boys em
ployed In Lord Tenrhyn's slate quar
ries, in Wales, went out two and a half
years ago, and tho settlement of the
strike Is now a question in British
party nolltlca.
The honor of possessing the largest
membership of any automobile club
in the world rests with the Automobile)
Club of Great Britain and Ireland,
which has now no less than 2,180 mem
bers. -30 TO-
BON TON
BAKERY
JOHN II. BAUM, Prop.,
For good first-class baked
goods such as fine Marble
ake, English Wine Fruit
Cake, French Fruit Dev
iled Cake, Angel Cake,
Lady Fingers Jelly Drops,
Kisses, Maroons and
lots of other good cakes.
A fine selection of all kinds
of cookies; a good line of
Fresh Bread and Parker
House Rolls, Buns, Coffee
Cakes. A nice selection
of pies always on hand.
Wedding and Parties a
Specialty. Give us a Call.
jijrrii'iKiiiij!
IUUU.I111EEE
YOUNG'S
PLANING
M I L.L
You will find Sash, Doors,
Frames and Finish of all
kinds, Rough and Dressed
Lumber, High. Grade Var
nishes, Lend and Oil Colors
in all shades. And also nn
overstock of Nails which
I will ttell cheap.
J. V. YOUNG, Prop.
Mtif If IIITWBSiaajl
TTT'.ViH'TI
:3xxszr