THE ORAM) SCIIEMEIi
HE PLANS A DEVICE THAT WILL TAKG
TH6 PUBLIC BV STORM.
Malar Crofoat Orlalnatr the M. W.
It. Company. FIHIiik l.ona Felt
Want, nnil InrlnVntaltr Take la
Lawyer Frlrnit.
(Cspyrlzht. 1900. by C. B. Lwl.l
The grand pnuiiotrr snt nt Ills desk
In his office with n wniiiliTlng look on
bt fnee and 40 pent In rlmnjse spread
out before Mm. Me hnd been rntinilns;
that chance over mid over Hiid (Irui'Iiir
how many time the 2H he owed lili
landlady, tbe $12 he owed bin tailor,
the $4 be owed hi batter and the 173
he owed various other people would go
Into that 40 cent. He was Mill about
It when he heard a step on the stnlra.
It was the step of an ninrrealve man.
Aa It came nearer It betokened the atep
of a determined man. Aa the door waa
burst open without preliminary warn
ing the major recognized the fact that
he waa face to face with a elrcum
atance. For one brief second blc kncea
weakened, and be caught hla breath
with a Raap. Then he waa on bla feet
with hand outstretched and a smile on
hla face and saying:
"Bless my soul, but If you had been
two minutes later I should have been
on my way to your office! Come In;
come In."
"I didn't know as you would remem
ber me." dryly replied the visitor as be
looked around the office.
"What! Not remember Thompson of
Thompson & Thompson, attorneys at
law! You muxt be joking. My dear
"I WANT TO TAKE YOtJ TS,
man, Major Crofoot never forgets the
face or name of a friend. You more
than any other man in the world have
been in my thoughts for the hint three
days, and, as I remarked, I wux about
to start for your office. Thompson,
shake hands again."
"I haven't time," replied Thompson,
"Look here, major, bills against you to
tbe amount of $200 have been put Into
our hands for collection. You promised
to pay that old board bill two mouths
ago. I want to know what you are go
ing to do?"
"Do, my dear Thompson? Why, Km
going to give you a check In about ten
seconds for the whole Indebtedness.
You could have had your money long
ago If you had given me the slightest
hint. Major Crofoot has a good mem
ory, but how can you expect him to
keep track of shillings when he la
dealing In thousands of dollars."
"I heard you were promoting a lit
tle," said the lawyer as he watted for
the check.
"Ten companies formed In the last
three months, my boy, and the
eleventh just ready to be Incorporated.
Grand aggregation of over $300,000,000
capital thus fur, and every company
bound to pay at least 30 per cent divi
dend. What do you suppose I've got
on hand now!"
"I can't say, and as I'm In a hurry
yon may fill out that check."
"Tho biggest scheme of all the no
plus ultra!" whispered tho major with
a flourish of his right arm. "I expect
ed to stop at ten, but this scheme
came pushing along and I had to take
It up. It's tbe richest of them all.
It'll pay 100 per cent profit from the
very start. In a week from now the
Standard Oil company won't be on
earth."
"But I'm here about those bills."
"My dear Thompson, walk with me.
When I waa hard up, you wero one of
the few who did not lose confidence In
my Integrity. The man or woman who
trusts Major Crofoot never regrets It.
I might not have picked up this elev
enth scheme but for you. I wanted to
let you In. I wanted to reward you
for your faith In me. Thompson, my
boy, sell out your law bUBlness give
It away get rid of it before night."
"I want to know about those bills,"
said the lawyer aa he came to a halt.
"The last aud best scheme of all,"
continued the major as be got bold of
hla arm again, "is the Musical Wash
board company, organized on a capital
of $20,000,000. The Idea la strictly orig
inal with me. Washboard runs a music
box while you rub. Music box can be
placed in the laundry, parlor, kitchen
or even the next house. May arrange
later on to have 'em connected with
drug stores, kindergartens' and public
schools. Twenty-four tunes In the box,
evenly divided between sad and lively.
Aa the washerwoman rubs away at
one of your colored shirts the music
box atrikea up 'Comin Thro' tbe Rye.'
She changes off to a sheet or pillow
slip, and you have 'Home, Bweet
Home,' with variations. Thompson,
hake hands!"
"I won't do It. I cume here Vo notify
you that these bills must be paid at
once or you will be haled Into court" .
"It's a bummer, my boy it's a suc
cess from the start Costs nothing ex
tra for the music, you know. While
you are hiring a woman in the luuudi y
for a dollar aud a quarter a day she'f
furtilKhlng music for the parlor free
gratis. Tut a bedqullt on the wash
board and you can hear the strains of
The Old Oaken Ducket' from garret to
cellar. Iet the woman tnrkle a table
cloth, and everybody goes dancing to
the tune of 'Maggie Murphy's Home.'
H nig stores can bnve It at a slight
cost for their patrons, and public
schools needn't pay a cent. Kub-a-dub-duh!
Music by the box! Thompson,
don't miss It. Don't throw a good
thing over your shoulder. I want to
lake you In. I have taken you In. You
are to be secretary of the M. W. C. at
$2n,ooo a year."
"That's all wind." bluntly exclaimed
the lawyer, "and It won't work. Will
you draw me a check for $200?"
"Isn't it a wonder that somebody else
didn't strike on the Idea?" whispered
the major as he patted Thompson on
the shoulder. "The washboard has
been known for 200 years. What was
easier than to make friction run a mu
sic box to soothe the sorrowful, lull
the ailing or enthuse the discouraged?
It would have saved thousands of lives
annually, prevented thousands of sui
cides, and yet no one thought of It.
Thompson, shake hands! It's the sec
retaryship at $20,000 a year for you,
and I'll get you $!M).000 worth of stock
at ground floor figures. Months ago,
when I was hard up and couldn't pay
a bill of $7, you put your hand on my
shoulder In a brotherly way and tnld
you had every confidence In my finan
cial Integrity. Vo yon Imagine I've for
gotten that. Thompson? Not by the
grave of my grandfather! I never think
of It without the tears coming to my
eyes."
"Io you want to be sued for these
accounts?" demanded the lawyer when
he could get In a word.
"And your reward for trusting me Is
this." continued the major "the salary
of $20,000 Is only a starter. I'll double
It after the washboards get Into the
market. The $W),000 In stock will pay
you $25,000 a year In dividends at the
very least, and perhaps double that,
and there you are. You can safely put
your first year's Income down nt $05,
000. Is that enough, Thompson? If
not Just say the word, and I'll add
$20,000 to It. Meanwhile"
"Meanwhile I want no more of your
wind!"
"Meanwhile, my dear secretary of
the M. W. C, I owe $200. You have
the accounts to collect. Just mark 'em
'collected.' and I'll pay In the $200 to
hold your stock. Always have to have
a deposit os evidence of good fnlth,
you know. If It was anybody else. I d
demand a certified check for $10,000.
Thompson, go home and throw your
lawbooks out of the window."
"I'll be hanged If I do! I want to
know"-
"Throw your lawbooks out of the
window, dissolve the partnership, and
then take your position as secretary.
No hurry for a day or two, but don't
wait too long. I waut to get tho arti
cles of Incorporation through as soon
as possible and patent the Idea. Good
by, Thompson, goodby."
"But I want that check!" protested
the lawyer as he was pushed out.
"And the washerwoman rubs and
the box plays on," replied the smiling
major. "We'll have 80,000 washboards
playing 'Yankee Doodle' and 'Home of
My 8oul' before the month Is out, aud
If you want $15,000 In advance on your
salary and profits send your boy
around and I'll fill out a check. Good
by, Thompson, goodby, and remember
to keep mum till our patent la secur
ed." The door waa shut and locked, and
there waa grim silence for Ave min
utes. Then the major heard threats
and vows and mutterlngs, and some
one went slowly down atalra.
M. Quad.
Crowlnsr Matches.
The Belgian artisan spends hla lei
sure In a very curious manner. He
keeps a special cock for crowing, and
the bird which can outcrow Its fellows
has reached the highest pinnacle of
perfection. The mode of operation Is
to place tbe cages containing the roost
ers In long rows, for it appears that
one bird sets the other off crowing. A
marker appointed by the organizers of
tbe show Is told off for each bird, hla
duty being to note carefully the nunv
ber of crows for which It Is responsible
In the some fashion aa the laps are re
corded In a bicycle race. The custom
ary duration of the match Is one hour,
the winner being the bird which scores
the highest number of crows in tbe al
lotted time. A great number of these
competitions have taken place In the
Liege district, and in some cases heavy
bets have been made on the result
Uaat la Heat.
Gout baa been produced In hens by a
n if sin it doctor who fed them with
meat. He gave the hens nothing hut
horseflesh without fat and as nnidi
water as they liked, with deplorable
results to the unfortunate fowls. Mar
big Instilled the disease, he then tin
dertook to drive out the uric acid by
administering eggshell, which relieved
the hens to a certain degree.
Radishes.
Radishes originated In China, where
they have been cultivated for many
centuries and sometimes grow aa big
as a man'a head. In Germany the old
fashioned country mothers cure hoarse
ness and cough with radish' juice mix
ed with sugar candy. The radishes of
today have no flavor, no character.
Formerly their sharp, biting taste made
them palatable.
A Similar Hint.
Horry wnntcd to give Lucy birth
day present, but could not make up hla
mind what It should be: so the next
time be called be frankly told her the
difficulty under which be wn Inltorlng.
"Want to mnke me a present. Har
ry?" exclaimed Lucy In well counter
felted nstonlHliment. "Why. Hurry,
you forget yourself!"
Harry took the bint and offered him
self on the spot.
A Jary Ream Gent.
A gem from the records of a Missouri
routt, gtven In an address by Hon.
William H. Wallace, la the following
lucid verdict In a lunacy case: "We,
tbe jury, impaneled, sworn and chang
ed to Inquire Into the lnsangulnlty of
Heseklah Jones, do occur In tbe affirm
ative." Twa Bat Bltaa.
Diogenes, being asked, "What li that
beast which Is the most dangerous?"
replied, "Of wild beasts the bite of a
slanderer and of tame beasts that of
the flatterer."
When a man Is hungry, he doesn't
waste much time reading the bill of
fare.-Chicago News.
If the average man could read the
story of his life be wouldn't believe
It Chicago News.
The uure that uures
Coughs,
Colds,
Grippe,
WHQOPINQ COUGH. ASTHMA.
BRONCHITIS AND INCIPIENT
CONSUMPTION
OTTOS
old by all 'druggists 25S0ctsf
WHEN IN DOUBT, TRY
toed the tett oi ve-r.
nd have cured thouiandf of
ease o( Nervoui PUeaie,tmh
Debility, Dinlncii, bleeplrtf
Bets and Varicocele, Atrophy, ke
They dearth brain, strengthen
me circulation, make ainnum
(perfect, and Impart a healthy
vigor loth whole beles. All
k drains and louts are checked
ttrmantntlv. Unlets ttatlenis
II ara nrnnerlvetired. their Condi
tlon often worries them into Insanity, Consump
tion or Death. Mailed sealed. Price ft per boa
6 boxes, with Iron-clad legal guarantee to cure or
refund the money, $5-00. Send for frea book,
For hhU by H. Alex Bloke.
OUUIIK.HK.ai
Strong Agi
EVERY WOMAN
Pometlmes noetls ft MlnMo
in mthly regulating nifefiu 1
DR. PEAL'S
1 V
ENNYROYAL pILLS,
' n:rt. Fflf.'. a ml certain In result. The mnu-
!V 1 MHvur dl appoint . S 1 .00 pr box.
I'or mile hy II. Alex. Htoke.
DOES
YOUR
HEAD
ACHE
IT WILL MOT
IF YOU TAKE
KRAUSE'S
HeadachcCapsules
$500 Reward for any Inju
rious eubstnnca found in
theft Capsules,
nurmiumw
Will Cur any
Mony refimifml If not
we ny. M.111 ponli.i
TWEHTT-rnnt even
NORMAN L1CHTY MFC CO.,
Oct MoinM, lows.
For mile Ivy II. Aii'X Hi.il.t-.
Fancy Screen Doors j
in stock sm s, odd sizes made
$ to order nt
YQUN0;S PL.flNINO.MILL
; I have tlie finest stock
t of Varnishes in the town.
I Parties wishing to reno-
vnte their furniture will
find Flattine of great
value, i ving the appenr-
J nnce of line rtd)l)ed work.
Also floor finish, for sale
5 in any quantities at
E YOUNG'S PLANING MILL.
!
Want Your '
Clothing to Fit ?
Then you ought to go to
J. C. :Froehlich,
MERCHANT TAILOR.
My line of samples are well
worth anyone's time to call and
inspect. Rememher
All Work In GunnmttM'd.
Cleaning, Repairing and Alter
ing a Sjieeialty.
J.C. PROIillLICH.
Next door to I't li'ulci' Ili'im.
IIUFFALO, ROCHESTER k PITTS-'
UUHGH RAILWAY.
TIME TABI.R.
On snd nfier Mhjt gitili, Km, piiiwnn
ifcr imlns will nrrlvx Htnl (li'pitM from Hvyn
nlilxvllln (Hit Inn, dolly, except Buiidnr, as
followm .
lire a nr.
S.Hip. m. Wcik dy only. For FbIIh (!rwlc,
I Hi Mnl. CiirweiiKvllle, ClimrtMil, I'tinxxn
luwticy, Itullcr, I'lliHlitnit, Hmeliwsy vlll".
KIiIkwht, JoliiDHinliurii, Mt. Jowill und
Itrtidfni'd.
Amuvn.
1.20 p.m. Week fluy nnly. From I'lnnrflnld,
1 iirwnRTiiir, rill! lll'PK, JIIIHOIH, rilll.-
Iinrir, IIiiiIit ii ml I'lNH-inHm
SIII'TII SnllNII.
V.
(AINH I.KAVK FALLS CllKEK
Subscribe for
The Star
If you want the New.
J.Mn. m. Jlnlly. Mulit, Kjuiii fr PiinxaU-
liiwni'y, IMytoii, lliiili'r nml I'HiHliiirn.
7.1:1 H. m. Wwk dnyn only. For Ills l(un,
I'liiiXHiitHwni-y, llulli'l', rillHliuru and In-
li'tnitMllnte point.
10.M n. m. nnrt 7.4!l p. m. Weckdnra only. For
Unlink, Ht unify, Sykcit, Ills Hun nndVunx-
iitnwmy.
J.44 p. m. Unity. VcHtllitilin limited. For
I'liiUHiitHwnry, Dsyliin, Hutlur and I'lttn
liinx. WOHTII tlOt'HII.
2.(n.in. Unity. Mulit Khimc-b fur Itlilimuy,
.1 nt, ii in tin m , Miilliilo mill HiK-lieitrr,
T.IK ii. in. snd Wji. in. Wwk iliivminly. Fur
HiiH'kwnyvllli', Itliluwiiy. JnliiiHiiiiliiirK, Mt,
.iMwi'tt mid llriidfiird.
I2..vjn. m. Iiiilly. VvatllHili-d limited. Fur
UlillMvuy, .liihtmonliiiiK, HiRilford, UulTuln
nml Knrlii-HiT.
I.no p.m. Wwk rlitysonly. Ai-vommodsttim
fur Kityiinlilxvlllir.
TrnliiH (or Cut Kfimt lllu, t'li'nrfli'ld snd Inter-
mi'illnte Hliittnim li'Hve Flilln Crunk at 7.2B a.
in., 3.4(1 miilH.Ki p. in.
I'liiiiiKHnd mill: ticket noiiil fur unmnse
over Buy imrtliin nf I lie It.. It. A I, nml lleech
rrci k rtillnmil bid on milu at two i'i) cents
per miIIh.
For ticket, limn tables snd full Informs
tlnn spnly to
K. C. IIavih. Aiient, Hcynnlilnrllle, t'.
E. It. I.AFST, Oen. I'ui.. Audit.
Kochester N Y
FCCORSETS
MAKE
American Beauties
FCCORSETS
Made in all the newest models and
leaden in striclv exclusive designs.
They have a national reputation for
genuine corset worth. Send for our
illustrated price list. '
KALAMAZOO CORSET CO.,
Salt Maktrn. Katamatao. Mich. 1
For taU by
J. J. SUTTER.
tsss
TWELFTH ANNUAL
ftoo
2
mm
Mi
OPENS SEPTEMBER 6, CLOSES OCTOBER SO,
MUSIC BY THE WORLD'S GREATEST BANDS.
THE FAMOUS BANDA ROSSA, ITALY'S GREATEST MUSICAL
ORGANIZATION. . Sept. 5th to 15th.
EMIL PAUR, WITH THE NEW YORK METROPOLITAN OPERA
HOUSE ORCHESTRA. Sept. 17th to 22d.
SOUSA AND HIS BAND, DIRECT FROM PARIS.
Sept. 24th to 29th and Oct. 15th to 20th.
DAMROSCH'S NEW YORK SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA,
WALTER DAMROSCH, Conductor. 50 pieces. Oct. 1st to 13th.
WSIW ATTHAOTIOlf a.
JIM KEY. Tss Mamlloiii Educslis Herit. THE MEXICAN VILUGL
PHILADELPHIA COMMERCIAL MUSEUM, Special Exhibit sl lh Products of Iht sntlra WorM.
A DAY IN THI ALPS. THE CRYSTAL MAZE.
ADMISSION, 25 CENTS. One Fare for the Round Trip on all Railroads.
Vou Know
Where we are located.
Our StoGk is
What You Want
To select from. Ask for what you don't see in our store It is Here.
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ft
UF-TO-DATE in every respect. It is
atTTTJ, AMD OOlVrTT vTOFi TvTTsJT
House . .
Furnishing
Goods . .
if
A man who finds no satisfaction In
hliiiSL'lf seeks for It In vain elsewhere.
BED ROOM SUITS,
LOUNGES,
COUCHES,
CARPETS,
LINOLEUMS,
WINDOW BLINDS,
TABLE CUTLERY.
In fact, anything needed for House
Furnishing.
r Our Motto:
BEST GOODS FOR LEAST MONEY.
WE WISH TO MENTION-
that in the line of
. STOVES .
We have samples on
our floor in season.
75 to 100 styles of
Heating Stoves for gas,
coal, wood and oil fuel,
and in
Ranges and Cook Stoves
We can at all times
show you 30 to 40 styles
and kinds to select from.
Linoleums, Floor Oil Cloths.
Remember
The place to buy
TINWARE,
GRANITEWARE,
WOODENWARE,
FIBERWARE, ,
LAMPS,
CUTLERY,
PAINTS AND OILS,
COLORS,
BRUSHES. , .
At lowest prices is at
The Reynoldsville Hardware Co.
if
I
-mQivE US A CALL
-THE-
REYNDLDSVILLE HARDWARE CO.,