VOLUME 3. KKYNOLDSVILLE, PICNN'A., WEDNESDAY, JANUAUY 10, UW5. NILMDEK : o r tt : i A i.nsvu. t. :. CBPITHU 9SO.OOO.CO. lll lii'll, f'rcxlilciitt Sn.lt Met Irllunit, t lee l'r.t John II. Knui lii r, t nslilcr. Dlrpctorn: l Mllelicll, HciiII M. I , Hml, .1. C. Illlllt, JiiHt ph St tiniH, .In-i-iili Hemic rsim, i. . I'lllh r, .1. If. Kiitielicr. Hoc ll ircriciiil l.tniMiiu business tinil snlli'lts til1 nt'i'nnnts of lnct-clitinl. pi'iiti'swlmml tni.n. farmers, nicchiintc. miners. Iimilicrnicn mihI oilier, pimiiUhiir tin. hmsi ruri-fiil iiltcntlmi to tin' ln.slnrNM itf nil person... Hnfe hepmit liM fur rent. First Niitlmuil Hunk InllMlnir, Nolan block Fire Proof Vault. COME IN! Where? Ti TIIK "Bee Hive" store, u in: UK L. . McEnlire, & Co., Tim (iroccrj niiin, drain in all kinds of Groceries, Canned Goods, Green Goods Tobacco and Cigars, Flour and Feed, Haled Hay and Straw. Fresh good a nlways on liand. Country produce taken in exchange for goods. A nhare of your patronage is renpectfully solicited. Very truly yours, Lawrence J. McEntlre & Co., The ri'ocerymen, CHEAPEST and best GOODS! Ever brought to our town in Ladies' Spring and Summer Dress Goods I Brandenberg never was gold less than 20 to 25c. per yard; will sell you now for 12. Dimity, Turkey Red Damask, 44 4 4 Prints, Ginghams, China Silk, 12Jc 37 05 05 25 Better Goods than you can buy any place else. The same Great Reduc tion in Men's - and Children's CLOTHING. Children's Suits, $ .90 1.00 1.25 1.75 1 1 it it Sincrle Coats. . 50 Youths' Suits, $3.25 to 8.50 Men's Flannel Suits, 5.50 44 Worsted 44 7.50 44 Fine Cheviot SuitB, $6 to 9.50 A fine line of Men's Pants. Come and examine my goods before you purchase else where. N. HANAU. A WANT. I'm lookln for some prrtty gill, Of ttHMlint, qiltrt mien. Who drtttftnft wi-11, known how to flpell And tins n wit Hint's kwn. I wittit no firkin wont her rnim Thnt turn with iv.-rr wind. I Vunk n lilmtd would milt mo brut. Kn imwt be bwi'II, rHImil. Bhn tnimt tn confnnt nn n ntnr No nn't'(r would do And, likt h"T own FWirt litllu fvlf, Ht-r irninmmr must Ik' trim, Yrt !nnr if hiih would 1w wllh me (Kxrusi tin sliitiu) liht "in it," Phi nintt !f nHe to tidtn down m hundn-d wordn n nilnnto. J. 11. Uori'inann In Hotnu nnd Country. AiNOVKL CUAUAiNTEE. A COMPANY THAT FURNISHES CER TIFICATES TO WOOERS. A ftnnn to the llnsy Mnn With a Mitr rlu(enlil liuiKhtir Itntlicr Olio Killed, nn the Wife I Not llmtml An Inter viewer of Whom Rutiit-thlns' Was Known. Seeing tho sign over the door, I filter ed. "If yon wish to confer with tho president, Kir, " until tlio young man i n front, "you will liml him in 1 1 i.s privato office," mill thnnUiir.? liim I entered tlio rear room, vlivro n jilcusiHit fared inan grcpti'd mo nirilially. "Won't you lio Riati'd?" Iin piild, (rraiing iim ly t'm hand. "Im your linsinrss rr I'nn'M'iitial?" "Not lit nil," I nulled. ' As 1 was passing liy I t'ion :lit 1 would Mop in nnd impiiro into thn n ovo nnd wopn of tlio Lnvi'i'.s' (lu'iraiilio I'onn.any, whirl) I f'o ii'lvcrtiso I ho oxtPiisdvidy. " "('( rt.iinly, " ho ti spond' d. "I fIihII ho only too i;lad to inform yon what wo nro hero for. Tlio Lovcvrt' (Juniimli'o company wai fornu'd for tho purposo of fipcuring pood lnisbands to nil niaiili'im matrimonially iiudincd, nnd tho great snocpsn wo Imvo met with thus f:;r proven that tlioro in nu excellent reason for our cxistenco. Tho nverngo man of nfl'airs 1ms littlo timo to look up tho chnraeter nud nntocodents of tho young follow who applies for his daughter's hand. Wo look him up, nnd if ho is Rat isfnetory ho gives us n bond, which oa titles him to u certilioato guaranteeing him to bo nil that ho claims. This bond mny bo good for flvo or ten yenrs. A man's financial status is of conrso easy to determine, but it is into tho finer at tributes of character that we examine particularly. Our certiflcnto is nn nbso- lute guarantee of tho man. Of courso we have to be part'cnlnr, for should the wifo at any timo insist upon n separa tion nnd show cnuso under the contrnnt wo would have tt pay nil her legal ex penses and furnish her a now husband or make over to her certain payments. " "But suppose, said I, "after the man is married off, there develops some hidden trait, somo idiosyncrasy that causes uuhnppiuess, but not separation, what do you do then?" "Such ensos, repliod tho president of tho Lovers' Uuarnuteo company, "nro raro, but of course they do occur. In a case l)ko this wo exiiuiiuo into tho cause of the difficulty, nud if the man bo wrong tho fact that lie is under bond gives us a power over liim, and generally we bring him to tonus. " "But, " said I, "suppose the woman in the case is wrong?'' "This," explained the president, "is extremely nufortniiato, ns wn have no means of reaching her direct, having no power over her. Wo can, howevor, nd viso tho mnn what to do, generally with most folioltons rosults. As n rule, those differences como fron ignorance on both sides. Whore they nro extreme nnd a separation is advisable we have in our employ the best lawyers, and divorces are obtained iu the most private way. "Wo have in our employ ouo of the most eminent phrenologists in the coun try, who examines the heads of all ap plicants. Our head physician, who gave up a large practice to come with us, has a growing staff of assistants, and these look carefully into the physical condi tion of tho applicants. You may depend upon it that when an applicant has suc cessfully run the gantlet we lay out for hint he will make a good husband. We advise all young married people to have homes of thoir own, no matter how humble, and have a home bureau through whioh a member oan obtain advice on the most desirable way to live, the best locations, list of bouses and apart ments and the lowest rents. By this means we are enabled to make an ar rangement with landlords so that our patrons can obtain certain discounts and privileges. Were you thiukiug aheml of entering upon the new life?" "Ob, no, " I roplied modestly. "I am already married, and, " I added laugh ingly, "I don't suppose oases of this sort come under your jurisdiotioa " "Indeed they do, " repliod the presi dent of the Lovers' Guarantee oompany. "We have lately formed a department for the benefit of married people and find it to be a great suooesn For a small sum yearly, iu advanoe, we furnish la dies with advioe as to the proper man agement of husbands and direct them how to act in ipocial emergonoiea. For lnstanoe, should husband be callod away too frequently at night 'on busi ness, imbibe too freely I may say this is one of our greatest obstnoles or should he beoorue ill natured or non tractable, we tell her what to da" "Is this department secret?" "Not at all, " he responded. "Indeed we invite publloity. buch is our repu tation that the mero fact made known to a mnn tnat his name is on our books will havo a tendency to bring him to his senses. " "My denr sir," Raid I warmly ns I rose to go, "you nro nncoinplislilng a great work, nnd I am glnd I called in to seo yon." TIipii, thnnklng him, I wa about to depart when ho stopped me courteously. "Exmtso inn, "ho said, "but wonld yon mind giving mo your mime? I al ways liko to tnko dow n thonnmes of nil Mir friends. "Certainly not, " said I. "I would just ns soon its not, ns it in juit pw iililo I mny wnnt to ndviso with you myself Inter on. My name, sir, is Withurhy. " A bright mid Piignging smilo camu over tho fnceof the president of tho Lov ers' Unnranteti company. "Ah, yes, in deed, " ho exclaimed. "J. Bco'.t Wither by, isn't it?" "That's it" I repliod, dumfouiided, a lump rising in my throat. "How tho mischief, sir, did you learn my uuinc?" "Very easily,'' ho responded cheer fully as ho renched over Into his depk nnd Imndcd ion pamphlet U I 1(1, oil "If You Aron Husband, Don't HenCrnnk." "Your wife was in hero only yenter dav " J. Hcott Witherby iu New York World BERNHARDT AND SARDOU. Tlio limrrrl ami IternnrlllMlon off tlto liriiniiillst ninl Artrt.nn. BjeakiiiK of Snrdou nnd Ilcrnhnrdt, tho illowing story ponccming Iho pn at French ni'tresi ami theciiunlly renowm d playwright ! Vouched for by the cirrn spi lull lit of 'J'hoCi airrii riles Ktnts-l'nis: Tlio two will have iichieveil the frnat fst triumph in "(iismomla, " M. Vic tniien hanl' ti and Mine. Narnli Hern hanit, wi in itt swords' points in tho bp I'inniii!.'. This tiisliko dated from "Dan iel ILis'lii t, " which Hardou gnvo to thn Coin' ilin l'raiicnise nfter hisuoiiiinntioii to tho French ncailemy. Barnli Hern hanit expected that Sunlon would select her to crcnto thn rolo of heroine in tho play, but ho choso Mllo. IJcrtet instead; henoo tho unger of Mine. Bern 1 1 unit. When tlio nctress nnd tho author met, tho former passed on tlio other side; tho latter pulled his lint down over his eyes. Kadi murmured something not nt all complimentary to tho other. Then Harali Bernhardt left tho Como dio Frnneaiso, wont to America, whero sho inailo her first triumphal tour, nud roturued to France. Upon her arrival in Furis sho entered into negotiations with Raymond Dcslnndo, manager of tho Vaudeville Hhe nsked nothing bet tor than to play thero. But what should sho play? bho did not wish to return to classicnl roles. Bho wnntod an entirely new piny, which should bring out all her qualities. "There is only ouo mnn who enn writo tho piny you wnnt," said Des luude. "That mnn is Bardou. " "Snrdou!" cried thooctross. "Such a disposition, incnpnblo of doing justice to nn artist. Moreover, irritable, brutal, a man who ruus up against everybody, who" "Very well," replied Dcslando, "lot us say no more about it. " IIo wont to sco Kardon and told liim that ho must havo a play for Bar ah Bernhardt. "Sarah!" exclaimed the ' writer. "Sarah I Such a disposition I Crabbed, disagrceuhle, quarreling with every body, who" "Very well, very woll, it is qnito un derstood. " And thrco months nfter Bardou read "Fedora" to Sarah, who, radiant, threw herself on tho nuthor's nock iu tho pros euco of Deslnnde. "Ah! Dcslnndo, " snid Snrdou, "what did I tell you? How gentle g,u j8 H0w swoot! Ilow tidorablul" "And ho!" rojoinod Bernhordt. "How nmiablo ho is! How ho appro oiates real talent, nnd how obliging! Euibruce mo, Raymond I" CAT ELECTRICITY. TboM Who Ttely on It For Cant It Far poHt Cnn Get it In Other Wkjs. Tlio London Lnnoet says; The oleotricnl effect produood by rub bing a oat's back is of course well known. It is also well known that this is friotlounl electricity, or, porhaps moro oorrootly, the oleotrioity of con tact; that it is a surface effect produced by tho rubbing; that it does not point to pre-existing electricity stored in the body of the animal, and that the person who, having omoludod a massage, sinks into a chair declaring that his exhaus tion is consequent on the loss of "the living galvanism" whioh he has im parted to the patient is a charlatan. It is to be romembered that Motion between any dissimilar substances al ways produoes elootriolty, and in illus tration of this the olootrioal effect some times produced in a dry atmosphere wheu the hair is combed on the body quickly divested of a flannel jersey may be lnstonoed, or the olassio experiment of rubbing a stick of sealing was on a rabbit's fur may be callod to mind. Those who are aoonstomed to rely on the curative effect of stroking a oat's back may find consolation in the last named experiment, inasmuch as it teaohes them that when their "feline favorite" is no more health and strength may still be secured by gentle friction on its skin. . Apart, however, from questions of elootro-physiology, it is instructive to learn that the presence of white in the color of a oat, unless the animal be wholo colored, is a sign of weakness. Shelley married an innkeeper's daugh ter, who proved uuoougeniaL He left her, and she committed suicide. JAPANESE HAIRDRESSINQ. The ditfct t.lltlo YVnmnn Hits I'rcnllur lilras Ahoitt Cic.nnlliii.iii. Tho Japanese toilet is robbed of ouo of its finishing touches by tho fact that no Inpiineso woman, geullo or simple, however fond she may bo of looking into tho sun shuicd gun metal ilUl;, sup ported on nn artist's enrol, w hich serves her for a looking glass, ever thinks of doing her own hair. Tho linir, niter having nil thn last week's fat (tho Japu Vi nro fxasperutingly clean iu their pd'Hons) scoured out of it, is pomaded up ulresh with tho uuctuotM mid not Very olfactory pleasant compound, cas tory oily, and woikud iuto a most elab orate coiffure, inure liko n hugo glossy black butterfly than anything else. As it is only dressed onco or twice a week, it is never taken down except by tho burber. But it is easy to sleep with your hair up when your pillow is merely a little wooden door scraper, with n hollow cut in it to lit the neck, nud a drawer in its base to hold the ornamental hairpins. Tho trim Japanese woman, whether she is rich or poor, uses a paper pocket handkerchief curried iu onu of her long hanging sleeves, with her tiny kiseru (pipe) mid silk tobacco pouch, nnd an other punch containing a tiny comb, mirror and pigment for coloring tho lips. Sho wears laid white linen nicks with ii divided great too, through which him inn its tlio strap of n delicate straw Kindal or n hii.'h kil l wood clog, accord ing to thn dryness of the went hi r, i tin r of them iliM-nrilcd the instant s!:u piitenit hnilihng, and In r para-el will It of tlio ualional Japanese shape, whether It lm of oiled paper or delicate ly embruiili red silk, though to bo suro thn fjain y damp umbrella ii about tho first contamination from the we t which !,r costume is likely to sillier. But I must not say any moro nbont tho dress of O llaiie Ban, the sweet lit tle woman whoso wholo lifelong lesson, toqiiotothn "Omni Daigaku" (greater learning fur women), Is obedience, bho never loses her temper, never uses a courso or irritating word, and is nlways piquant nnd gracious and smiling, though she will dio for her husband or her children or eniluro pollution for hor parents' gain with marble courage. Loudon Ornpliia JUDAISM AND HYGIENE. The Mosnla Law Una Given the Hebrew Bare Vigor anil Hardihood. It is Indeed not n littlo singnlnr that Christianity, in taking from Judaism its highest spiritual conception, should so have slighted tho wonderful body of hygienio seienco which tho Mosaic law omhodles. Tho explanation, however, probably is that Christianity nndortook to deal with the matters snpemnturnl, whilo Judaism, whethor niioient or mod ern, is concerned only with mundane af fairs. As Luclon Wolf admits, Judaism is really a sort of positivism. Its aim is thn nttnlumciit of hnppinoss in this world, whereas Christianity is chiefly concerned about happiness iu tho world to coino. But precisely bocauso Judaism agrees with Herbert Spcnooi, iu relegat ing supernatural speculation to the realm of thn unknowable, tho intensity of its worldly philosophy is tho creator. Thn wisdom nnd energy of the Jews, iu fact, have been centered for years upon the re-eiiforoemeut and protection of nil their natural forces. And thus it is that they anticipated tho riper results of sanitary seienco, whilo still the hang ing gardens of Babylon wore a world's wonder, nud whilo, from the tomple of Bolus, Chalilcnn priests oharted the hoavens nnd calculated tho occultations of tho stars. This Mosuio law, so de spised of the pontiles, has given to tho Hebrew race that vigor and hardihood which have brought it safely again and again through persecutions that must have rooted out weaker people, and to day, when the foremost savants of the nineteenth century are painfully soaroh ing out the genesis of disoase and labo riously devising remedies, the immuni ty of the Jews in tho midst of pestilence once more indioates the reason of their survival and emphasizes the triumph of their sanitary system. No other race has been willing to ac cept suob a discipline, and no other race, therefore, exhibits similar vitality and exemption from epidemio diseases. Mod ern teaohors of hygiene insist always upon the observanoe of system in these matters, and they bava reason, for the Hebrew raoe is a pregnant example of the power of hygienio and dietary laws, applied with unremitting vigor from generation to generation. Minneapolis Times. Too Many Funeral. A gentleman whose summer home Is in Vermont brought bnck to Boston one fait a manservant from the oonntry who had never before been in Boston. The sights and scenes in a big city im pressed him peculiarly. One day he went to his employer and said: "Mr. H , I shall have to go back home. " i "Why, Tom, have yon not been treat ed kindly hero?" "Ob, yes, the treatmeut is all right, but then I'm afraid of my health. " "How is that?" "Why, yon see, Mr. XI, I saw four funerals going past your house today, and I guess Boston is a plaguy unhealthy tort of a town. "Boston JonrnaL The amount of fatty matter or oil in maize is far greater than in wheat In the latter oil composes about 1 per oent; in the former, from 6 to 10. LINCOLN AND M'CLELLAN. Tho Latter Wim Kept In ( iiminnnil Me. rniiM) off I'll ll In Wellng. Just before thn battle of Chancellors Vlllo I visited tlinArmyof thn Potomac:, Its heiiilqn irt' rs being then nt Fal mouth, in I'rp-idcnf Lincoln's company. Wn wern detained eti rontn by n storm nnd spent one night on hoard tho steam rr anchored in the I'otomiui. In the conrso of conversation Hint evening tho president was coiniuutiicativu mid in a ooiifldcntinl mood and discussed thn mil itnry situation with much freedom. Hpenklng of MeCli Ihm ho said, "I kept McClcllnii in command nfter I had ex pected that he would will victories sim ply becauso I knew that bis dismissal would provoke popular indignation and shako thn faith of thopeoploln tho final success of the war. " Very bihiii after thn lmttln of Chancel lorsvilloand before thn Imttlo of (Jcttys burg wns fought the old rumor of Mo Chilian's rccnll ngnln pot upon its legs, to thn grpnt ponsternutioii of mnny of Lincoln's friends in Washington. This report wns moro than usually vigorous nnd platiMhln. ! looker's fnllnrn nt ( 'lion cpllorsvlllo nnd the blow which bis military prcstigii had sulTered In conse quence gavo ptiblit) opinion a decidedly sharp fillip. One evening, whilo this rumor was gaining strength, I chanced to bn in thn family sitting room nt tho Whitn lloiee, whero the president, Mrs. Lincoln ninl several callers were nsstni bled, win ii n indiscreet young lady di rect !y ntt .e . 1 Lincoln willi the extraor dinary qic ti"ii: "Mr. IV-ddeiit, is Me'JIeJlnn going to lio recalled to thn eomiiiiiiiil of the Army of the Potomac?" The pr"si:lent good natureilly parried this home thrust, but gave no satisfacto ry misv. i r. Afterward joining iu tho convcrs.it ion, I intimated to tho presi dent that ns ho had not settled tho mat ter there probably might bo some ground for thn general suspicion that McClollaii would bn recalled. Lincoln, who sat near me, put on a very severe look, and turning said in an undertone, "And you too?" I instantly rooallnd our conversation on tho steamer and apologized for my lack of faith. He then added, "1 see you remember the talk we had on tho Carrie Martin. "Noah Brooks in Century. RnMlan Jottlee. Gouoral Van Wahl, chief constable of the police of St Petersburg, when he was governor nt Kiov, received a visit one day from a poor woman, widow of a police agent who had fallen a victim to duty. For a long time sho had solic ited tho pension which was due her. Tlio head of tho police to whom she had addressed hor demand paid no attention to her plea. In her distress the widow wont to the governor and told him her story. "Ah, yes, wo'll seo what can be done, " snid General Wahl. "Sit down thore and writo what I toll you, " p .lut ing to a writing table. The widow took a seat and wrote from the governor's dictation a long supplication. "Now address it," ho said, "and wait for mo in the next room. " A few minutes later the woman was recalled, and tho gouoral gave iuto her bauds a sealed letter, saying the whilo to hor, "Take this lottor to the head constable, take care not to opon it, and coma back to mn as soon as you have a reply." A week afterward the woman appear ed at the paluco again. Hor pension had been granted, and sho thanked the gov ernor with joy. "It is useless to thank me. I am noth ing in the affair, " snid be, and imme diately gave the following order: "The hoad of tho police at Kiev is dismissed from his post and sent into exilo; the reason, because ho granted a demand after receiving a sum of money for so doing. " General Wahl had, unknown to the woman, slipped into her lotter a bank note for So rubles, which accounted for her supplication being granted. Youth's Companion. A Bl( Caloalatloa la Water. The ocean, sea and lake surface of our planet is estimated at something like 145,000,000 square miles, with an average dopth of 13,000 feet, and is cal culated to contain not less than 8,270, 600,000,000,000 tons of water. The riv ers of the earth are estimated to have a flow sufficient to cover 86 onbio miles of the above area eaoh day. Now, if all the oceans were suddenly dried and the rivers could keep up their present rate of flow, which, of course, they could not without ooean evaporation, it wonld take 8,500 years to refill the basin. St Louis Bepublio. A Terrine Shock. Mrs. Bangleton was reading of street car acaldent in Chicago to her husband. "The cars ran togother, " she said, "and Miss Wabash, who was standing in the aisle, was thrown from her fee i and" "Geewhia," exolainied hor husband, "those oars must have been going u hundred miles an hourl" Detroit Fret) Press. fouled. "Answer by return male" was tha way the letter wound np that Misa Footlites received from Mr. Buddourox. "I wondor," said she, "whether he means by the messenger boy or by post "Indianapolis JonrnaL FOR HIS BRAVERY. How Rilwaril, I'rlnee of Wnlrs, Won the Tltln or lllark I'rlncn. In the summer of tho your 13 10 Kd ward III crossed tho .Ingllsh channel with 110,000 men to iiivado Franco. At Crecy, not fur from the Scfii", bn was met on tlio 2(!th of August by King Philip with Fill, (100. Whilo tho French were coming on iu great disorder tiuio was u total eclipso of tho sun, accompanied by a tcrriblo storm, nfter which tlmsun cauio ' out brightly, shining directly iu tho faces of thn French, but on the backs of tho English. Tho first charge was mado by 15,000 Gcnoeso bowmen, who enmo forward with n shout, as (trough to senro tho English. Tho latter, who had been or dered to lio flat on tho enrth, now nron, stepped forward a pace and let go their arrows so fast that they seemed liko blinding snow. Tho (Jcnoeso fled, and tho French king oidered them to bo cat down, so that they would not hinder tho rest of tho army. In tho meniitimo Edward, thn princo of Wales, who wns in command of ouo division, wns surrounded by French knights, win', r 'cognizing tils rani:, de termined totapturo or kill liim. A mi s sago was pent to tho kin telling him that tho princo wns hard press' d. "Is my son dead or hurt or on the earth felled?" bo asked. "No, sire," was tlio reply. "Well, then," said too kirn;, "return to them that si nt you ami ti II Cum to send no moiu t i mo in 1-ii.,' my smi is iilivo. I ('ouiinniid them t Miller the child to win his spurs, f.r this day should bo his. " Tlio young princo was indeed in gr at danger. At onu timo bn wns unhorsed nnd struck to tho ground, hut. one of his Welsh knights, who carried the great dragon standard, throw it over liim ns ho lay and stood upon it till tho enemy wns forced bnck. Soon tho tidoof bnttlo hnd turned for tho English. Edward camn down from a high hill overlooking thn fie'.rl and took his son in his arms nnd kissel him. "Yon are my true son," lio snid. "Right royally hove yon ncqnittcd your self and shown yonrsolf to be a sover eign." Young Edward on this occasion wore a suit of black armor, which so contrast ed with his crimson and gold surcoat and the brilliantly fair comploxion of his round, boyish face that he wa call-. . ed from that time the Blaek, Prince. Boston Uorald. i t .'' -. BaelneM Competition. ( Billboard competition runs pretty high nowadays in the metropolis. An owner of some down town property was awakoned by tho loud ringing of his doorbell recently in Harlem. "Whnton earth is that?" bo exclaim ed. "Is the house on fire?" "Somebody's deod," said his wife. In the meantime a servant was return ing from answering the bell. "Please, sir, there's two gents down tnirs as wishes to sco you," snK the girl. "See mo? Why, it's 8 o'clock in tho morning." "Important business, they says, sir." "Well, I should think it would bo, wnking a man up this time o' night. I'll have to go down, I suppose. " no quickly throw on somo clothing and went below. Two "gents" awaited him in the hall. "I beg your pardon, sir, for knocking yon up at this hour, but I wnnt to mako yon a proposition for billboards around tho comer of your plocoon Blank street while yon nro rebuilding. Name your figures, including two theater tickets every night of the season." "And, sir," began the other "gent," "my company would like to make yon a proposition for the uso of the walls that may remain standing after the fire." "Firal Fire! What are you talking about?" The old man was completely nonplused, "Why, your place caught fire about two hours ago, " said the first "gent " "And is gutted by this time," added the second "gent" "Of course you'll give me the refusal for billboards. Remember the two the ater ticketsl" yelled the first "gent" as the old man bolted for the stairs. Cor. Pittsburg Dispatch. A Blfk Callla. Jndge Sulzberger spoke a truth which is too often forgotten when he said, in speeoh at the high school, that "there is not a teacher in the land that has a higher funotlon than has the lowest teacher in the lowest cums of the prima ry schooL They have onls before them, and the faculties of those active, rest less sonls have all to be called forth. " In those few fitting words are embraced the whole scope and possibilities of ed ucation, and they make the primary teacher's calling in point of dignity and responsibility the peer of any vocation that eonoerna mankind. Philadelphia Record. Borgne, the name of a Louisiana lake, is a Frenob word meaning "blind of one eye. " The name was applied to the lake becauso of wonderful monster aid to have been seen in its waters. Were it not for the multitude of storks that throng to Egypt every winter there wonld be no living in the oonn try, for after every inundation frogs ap pear in most incredible numbers. V-ev