VOLUME 1.
JREYNOLDSVILLE, PENN'A., WEDNESDAY, .ITXE 15, 1K92.
MlMDEIl 0.
gtlUrrllcmron.
Q MITCHELL,
ATTOHNKY-AT-LAW.
(Iffli-c on West Main street, oinoHe lite
('oninierclnl Hotel, Keynolilsvllle, Ph.
jju. u. e. hoovkh,
HEYNOLDSVILLE, l'A.
Ilealdent dentist. In 1ntlilliit near Mettio
flint church, opposite Arnold lilock. (lentil1
lies In oMM-ntliiK.
4)otri.
JJOTEL McCONNKLL,
RKYNOLDSVILLK, PA.
FRAXKJ. MACK, Fmprictor.
The Killing lintel of til town. Itadiiinr
ters for -ommeivlHl men. Htcem heat, free
Muis batli rooms nnd closets on every floor,
Hanitilo rooms, lillllurd room, telephone, con
nevtMeia, Air.
JJOTEL DELNAP,
HEYNOLDSVILLE, PA.
GREEN & (VysKK, PrnprHwK.
HrM class In every pniitciiltir. f,ortitod In
the very centre of the ImslneH mrt of town,
l-'ree 'bun to 1111(1 from train and coromodtoiin
witnplp room for commercial t rnvcler.
MERICAN HOTEL,
BUOOKVILLE, PA.
niFFixamy loxh, vuv
Omul bun to ntifl fnm1l triiltm. EnmiM'tin
TCHtiiurtint. Houno twitted and lltfhtrd hy
inm. Hot nnd colli wiitcr. Wtfvrn I nlou
TelrrrHph office In tiiilltllfiir. Th hotel in
fitted wnli nil the dhmIi'Mi t'onvrulrniTM.
JOMMKKClAL HOTIX.
HKCX)KVILLE. PA.,
JAS. II. rlJH Ell, J'rnprittnr.
Hamplc rnomson the ground floor. House
licnteil liy natural giis. Omnibus to mid from
ill train.
UFFALO, IKX'HKSTEH- & PITTS-
BUKG JIAILWAV.
Tito short between Dultol, Kliluwiiy,
Bradford. Nh lamiincii, HiifTiilo. Koeliester,
Niagara Fall nnd polntH In the upix-r oil
region.
On and after Mny S!d, isni, passen
ger train will rrlve and depart from full
Creek station, dully, except Sunday, iih fol
low: TtlO A. M. Bradford Accommodation For
point North Is-twceu Fulls Creek and
llradfnrd. 7:15 u. m. mixed triiln for
l'unxsutawnev.
10:O6A.M. Hiiniilound nWhcstcr mull Fur
Hnot'kwayvllli', (lgw'aylolinsoiiliiirg,Mt.
.lewett-, Bradford. Hiiliininncu, Hiiffulo mid
lloehesterj connecting ut .lolinsonlmrg
with I. & E. Iriiln , for Wilcox, Kane,
Warren, lorry and Krle.
10:&6 A. M. Accommodnt Ion For Pullols,
Sykes, HlgKun and I'uaxsiiluwiicy.
l:llO P. M. Hnidford AncommiMliitlon For
Hewhtiw, HnickwayvlIlK, Kllmont, :ar
mon, HldKwuy, JuIiiimoiiIhii'k, Ml. .In welt
nnd HriuL'ord.
4:&0 l. M. Mull For Dnllolx, HykPH, 9g
Kuii, I'unxHiitiiwncy and WiiIhIoii.
TiSS l'.M. Awommodalton For IIiiIIoIh.KIk
Kmi nnd il'iiiiXHUtawiwy.
Tralnn Arrive 7:10 A. M., Ai'mmmodutlon
I'unxHiiuwnoy! I0HKV A.M., Mall from Wal
nton nnd J'unxKiitawni-y; lll:M A. M.. Ai
rommodiitlon from Jlradfonl; 1:21) I. M..
Accommodation from I'uiiXHiitiiwnry: :lso
I'. M., Mull from llntl'iilii and Koi'liiwlcri
7:M I. M., Aci'ommiHlMtlon from Itrnilfonl.
ThmiKand mile ticket at two renin ,ier
mllo, good for pinmagc lictween all htiitlon.
J. H. MrlNTVHK, Aiiimt, Fnllncm-k, I'tk.
OHO. W. IlAim.r.TT, Juh. P. Thomi-hon
Oen.-rnl Supt. Uen. I'm,. Agent
Hrutlford, I'a. UoeheBter, N. Y.
A LLEGIIJiN Y VALLEY RAILWAY
t'QMPANY commonrinjj Sunday,
June .W, 1HHL Low Grade. Diviition.
EAHTWAKD.
So.l.No.S.Xo.9. 117
ll
Rod Hi,L
P. M
10 40
4 l
laWHonhnm ....
New Ki tlilehem
Oak Kldgo
Wlllvllk.
MayHvllIn
Wiimmorvllle ...
Krookvllle
ir'uller
UeynolilHvlllc ..
I'lincoaht
fnlUCruok
I in Hot..
flulnila
Wiiiternhurn ...
ln,.H..l,l
10 M
4 44
ft IN
2.
A 2
ft XI
11 2H
ll :f.
U M
11 4.1
12 m
12 2.1
12 4
ft Ml
6 14
ii ;ti
6 1ft
It M
A2I
7 02
1 On
1 (III
1 17
a m
n M
7 (17
7 10
10 ftft
11 u
1 4C
1 ftO
7 i:t
7
4:
1 42
I f7
7 2
7 41
7 4.S
3 ftl
H If,
H 22
8 Xt
jMn FlKher...'..
I 111
la.i
mwieuitio
(rant
Drt'twuod
244
9 (ml
p,
. u.
WKHTWAMD.
No.2 Nx No.10
A. M A. . F. H.
io or o ;ii
10 H2 7 UN
10 4:1 7 21
11 03 7 41
11 IS 7 IW
11 2ft W7
II ill ft l:i
11 4:i ft 27
12 (10 7 00 ft 44
1 17 . 7 10 ll
1 :u 7 in ft aii
1 42 7 21) 0 (IN
1 ft 7 411 9 2ft
2 21 8 ON V 4ft
2 HH 8 2N
2 ftN 8 ftl
8 02 8 ftft
w urn
a lfl 9 10
8 47 9 4ft
4 01 10 (in
A. M. A. M. P. H.
Prlftwood
Orunt
Hentte
Olon FUhor
Tyler
, I'imfleld
Wlnterliurn ....
Hunula.
HuHoIh.
FnllHCMiek.,..,
VimeoiiHt
Keynoliiwvlllij . ,
11 80
4 no
4 10
11 4.1
l' Uller..
Brmikvllbi
Hiimmervllln....
MiivhvIUb
MUlvlllH
(lukltldge
Now Urtlilohem
t LaWHonhuni. ...
lied Bunk
M.IA. M.p. U
Trutim dully exceut Mundav.
DANIU MoCAUOO, Gen l. Bitpt..
JA8. P. ANDERSON, OkWl. V'akn!A!t.J'
I'ltiHhui'g, Pa
IK) YOU NEED
A NEW ATTIBE?
If bo, and you want a (tikhI
flttinjf and well made Buit at a
reutjoiiable flirure you will re
ceive Bunie by jilafing: your
order with
J. C. Froehlich,
TtIK AltTlSTW
TAILOK,
Next door to Hotel MoConiiell,
KEVNOLDMVILLE, PA.
Mc-Kce & Warnick
IIE,IV1'AI1TF.H8 FOIl
fancy mid Staple
GKOCK1UES,
Oil, Flour. Feed.
An Hegant lin con
nifting of Hour, pwt'et
nnd mixed pickltw.
OnioiiH, chow chow,
olivt'B, onuliflowera
and otlierB too nuiner
oiih to mention.
An endlt'HH variety on
hand; always frenh.
Try our fruit and
chocolate cakew.
"Wanliburne'8 Bent"
leadri the lint; it's a
dandy. Try it. We
have in ntock, "Our
Bent," "Straight,"
"Imperial," "N. W.
Patent," "Pilgrim"
and others.
3
Cm
We have no oil wagon
011 the road but we
deliver you a T gal.
best lfU) oil for 50
centw. Get our rates
on oil by the barrel.
A FULL .S'7''K of rimMi In mir
line iiln'ifH on hntul. Illffhent
market price )iil ' eountrji
prmliire.
norms kevkivei
DAILY.
A O OLD HOODS
FOR SALE.
McKcc & Warnick,
The Grroceix,
Cor. iSth ami Mil in St
. . IteifnohlHvllle, J'enna.
-: IN OUIt :
Shoe Department
carry only reliable
makori, and we could fill
the one side of this issue
with testimonials in re
gard to the wearing qual
ities of our shoea. What
is termed among shoe
dealers as cheap shoes,
4 'for instance, " shoes that
sell for one dollar a pair,
we do not handle, for
the simple reason that
goods of that kind will
not build up our shoe de
partment. AVe buy no
shoes from what is called
"Jobbers," but place our
orders three and four
months in advance, with
the best shoe manufac
turers in the country.
C J)ur dry goods depart
ment is full of spring
fabrics, at prices lower
than the lowest, and all
we ask is that you give
us a call and Compare
Prices and Quality, don't
forget the quality, as
that goes a long ways as
regards price. Quality
first, price second.
J. 13. AHNOLD.
DIET AND HEALTH.
A Mnn Cnnlrt I.Itb llnnlty l.onrr Than
a Wepk on Anparnffttfl Alnne.
Eniieeinl ittterent ftUnchpn to Dr. Rnlla
bnry'g food pxperimentH. The luilf dozen
ntnrily fellows whom ho Jitit on n diet of
linked lieim and eolTeo exclunively, nil
uliowed yiiiitoiiin of locomotor ataxia,
or proKreFslve paralynin, on the tenth
day, and by the Mxteenth day not one of
them conld walk trnlg)it without "tip
port; all had clironlo diarrhea, lienrt
palpitation and opprenoed brentliinir.
Fonr hearty, well men were put on
oatmeal porridRetiPSiwiiied with butter,
pepper and unit with a pint of coffee
containitiK imjarand milk atencli meal.
Constipation, flntnlence, headaehe nnd
dizzinem were aflliuting them all on the
eighth day. In two dayi more these con
ditionn hnd liecome violent; exertion pro
dnced heart palpitation, and they were
full of wandering pains, with prickling
in feet and hands.
These disorders grew more intense nnd
painful with neuralgia induced in three
cases until from the twenty-third to the
twenty-fifth day, when diarrhea set in,
and the record is full of such entries as
"Eyes wild, hearing impaired, head con
fused, memory poor, legs and feet numb,
quite deaf and listless, heart palpitates
and very irregulnr," up to the thirtieth
day, when it was deemed imprudent and
unsafe to carry the experiment further,
and in four days more, by a meat diet
and hot water, the men were restored to
normal henlth. It may be well ta ob
serve hero that in all cases men experi
mented upon were as thoroughly and
quickly cured of their abnormal condi
tions by those means.
Violent chronio diarrhea, Mich as often
prevails in nrmle nnd is known as
"camp diarrhea," was produced in three
hearty, strong men by feeding them ex
clusively mam army biscuit in from nine
teen to twenty-one days a sjiell of con
stipation preceding and microscopic
examination proved that they were liter
ally filled witli yeast germs. Each hnd
marked symptoms of locomotor ataxia
and partly lost the use of his lower
liniTis.
Dread, rico, wheaten grit, hominy,
sago, tapioca nnd potatoes were eph fed
to four or six men at a time for periods
of from forty to forty-five days before
serious diseases nnd symptoms were pro
duced. Oreen peaii and string beans
ranked next in point of alimentary quali
ties. Green corn, turnips, heetg and
squash quickly produced unpleasant ami
grave derangements, but of all vege
tables asparagus was foud most injuri
ous when lived upon alone. Seven days
is alxmt as long as it would bo snfo to
subsist on this plant, owing to the effect
upon ttlie kidneys.
PatientH have lived exclusively on beef
and mutton for from throe tofouryoArs.
Still, if one sticks to tliem too longtfiey
are liable to become monotonous, and
may nuse "meat dyspepsia," which is
dangerous. People w5jo live exclusively
on vegetable food, an the Hindoos, are
enabled to do so by inherited organic
tendencies. Tlioir stomachs are of little
or no use to them. The pyloric- valvo
being permanently paralyzed remains
open, so that vegetable matter jiasse
directly into the proper field of its diges
tion. Ohio State Journal.
Anriimtijr'a Ktr Twin (luna.
'The Gorman emperor was present at
some experiments conducted at Meppen,
with new twin gun against armor
plutos. The idea ix that by firing the,
guns simultaneously at one object, the
crushing force of tho two projectiles will
be such that tho stoutest armor must
give way before such a shock. In or
der that this may really happen, it is
obviously necessary that, in .tho first
place, the explosion in each gun should
be effected at the same fraction of a sec
ond, that the charges slAuld be exactly
equal-and burn exactly the same time,
that the shots should be of exactly the
same weight and that they should reach
the object aimed at simultaneously. Such
accuracy is extremely difficult to com
pass, and it is believed that very con
siderable trouble will be necessary be
fore the .object in view can be realized.
Vanity Fair.
Why Mr. Woodhaad Wm Absent.
There was once a Mr. Woodhead who
got into parliament in 1886 for the Span
valloy division of Yorkshire. Mr. La
bonchere moved to abolish the house of
lords, and Mr. Woodhead was absent
from the division. Spen valley demand
ed an explanation from their errant
member, and got it in the form of a let
ter setting forth that it was all Mr. La
bouchere's fault, who spoke so flippantly
on this important occasion that Mr.
Woodhead, exhausted with a long day's
work, seized the opportunity to go home
to bis tea, and when he returned the di
vision was over. Owing to the amusing
character of this explanation, coupled
with the honorable gentleman's unfortu
nate name, this incident attracted a good
doul of notice at the time. London Cor.
New York World.
Walllugtou'a Biim of Duty.
A most interesting anecdote of Wel
lington, illustrating the high sense of
duty in all things, is told on the author
ity of the duke's housekeeper at Walmer
castle. The huge Ditto Book of 800
pages on the studies and discipline of
the University of Oxford had been sont
to him as chancellor. He was engaged
on it the night beforo his death; ho was
going to bed, as it was late. He left the
llltte Book with his pencil in it, and said
to Lord Charles Wellosloy, who was
with him, "I shall never got through it,
Charles, but I must work on." Leisure
Hour.
tVnmen One Mnn llntit.
One of the meanest of conversational
tricks Is a favorite one with women. A
fellow has something real nice nnd
clever to say. Ho is rounding np nicely
to it, when some chit of a woman takes
a gasp and says, "Oh, yest I know what
you mean," and, by jingo, says It. Of
course site gets all the credit. I do hate a
woman like that. She Is the kind of
woman who says, "Ah, yes!" nnd then
goes off Into a poetio illustration of the
fact you have announced something
nice and dreamy that she never could
have said by herself. I hate that sort of
woman, making herself seem so clever
and bright and pontic and all that from
your brains.
She laughs before you have got your
funny story out and says, "Yes, Isn't It
funny?" It mnkes It so easy for you to
go on, that does. Actually, sometimes
she will finish It for you. That is the
kind of woman I hate too. She is al
ways coming In with a "Yes, but," and
upsetting what you have said, or else
hauling out another side of it that you
didn't mean to have brought np. I hate
women like that. I say let women learn
to cook and sew frills, not talk like
Idiots. Washington Post.
fttreat Car Com pan lea Nut Reapunalhla.
An Incident of special Interest in con
nection with the electric street car line
of Halle, Germany, is that the German
government stopped the running of the
electric cars immediately after the open
ing ceremony, liecanse they Interfered
with the proper working of the tele
grams and telephones. The case came
before the law courts nnd the judges de
cided In favor of tho railroad company,
stating that the streets of a city were in
tended for general trnffle, and that their
course could not lie altered, but that the
postal authorities could easily make any
necessary deviation in the lino of tho
telegraph and telephone wires so as to
place them beyond the influence of the
electric lines, which use the rails nnd
earth for the return circuit. New York
Telegram.
ValiiHlilft Anillrtiim.
Brass andirons, big mid little, tuny be
bought In the antique shops at from
$3.S0 to $411 a pair. The most highly
prized Irons are called Chippendales.
The chnrncterislic of thu Chippendalo is
a shaft in three parts, that nearest the
feet lieing hexagonal, the next largo and
egg shaped and ihe top repeating the
same egg form in about one-third the
diameter.
Another favorite form is characterized
by a small vase, like n Colonial sugar
bowl, lit the top; a long, slender shaft,
with a Corinthian capital, ou which the
vase restH. and n base Unit often has
three feet, Some of these have the rear
horizontal bar crocked, so that a short
leg limy be held without bringing the
vorticnl shafts too close together. Just
at the bend usually rises a second nnd
smaller shaft of brass. Now York Sun.
How Well Known Man flfovp.
(Hnilstone, rarelv takes less than seven
hours' sleep. Wlienever he is preparing
for a. great effort in the houne of com
mons he always likes n short afternoon
siesta. liisnmrc.U has displaved a sim
ilar habit on the occasion of the most
fiorco parliamentary debates. When all
night sittings were common Pnrneli
would go to Itis hotel, seek bis bed and
leave instructions with one of his col
leairues to have him aroused whenovera
crucial point was reached. These are
only a few examples of the great men
who have showa their thorongh uiipreci
ation of that great lraon which 'ka. ' up
the raveled sleeve of care.'" Interview
in Ut. Louis Globe-Democrat.
Why Teak Wood la Itarahle.
Tho teak, which has passed into prov
erb as tho best material for shipbuild
ing, is superior ta all other woods from
the act that it contains aa essential oil
which prevents spikes and nails driven
into it from rusting. This property is
not possessed by any other wood in the
world, and furnishes an explanation of
the faet that ships built of teak are
practically indestructible. Some have
been known to lost for 150 years, and
when broken up their beams were as
sound as when first put together. Phil
adelphia Ledger.
A Jakota Sandatorm.
Not lunger ago than May, 1880, there
was a dnststorm in Dakota, during
which the soil, to the depth of four or
five inches, was torn up and scattered in
all directions. Drifta of sand were
formed, in favorable places several feet
deep, packed precisely as snowdrifts are
packed by a blizzard. Qoldthwaite's
Geographical Magazine.
At tha Mualcala.
Suffering Auditor Will that girl at
the piano never stop? She is making
every one in the room miserable.
Girl at the Piano (sotto voce to gal
lant musio turner) So good of you to
say so? It is a pleasure to interpret
melody. And it is so sweet to confer
happiness upon others. Pittsburg Bul
letin. SuUIIng- Uer.
Mr. Richchapp Miss Bcauti doos uot
seem to be a very warm friond of yours.
Miss Protti N-o, I behove she and
my mother hud some sort of a quarrel
when they were girls. New York
Weekly.
Natural.
"We went bang into the iceberg and
slid off to one side. The ship fairly
shivered."
That was natural. I think I'd shiver,
so close to au iceberg. Harper's Bazar.
Myth of AnHrnt Mnrlnera.
Sailors' yams have nlwnvs lieen celo-
brnted for their imaginative character.
Thoso of today, however, have no oppor
tunity for favorable comparison with the
stories told by mariners of antiquity.
Tho latter were able to count iiihui nn
inexhaustible public credulity, nothing
which they could possibly invent lieing
too monstrous or unusual for belief.
Their tales presumably did mnch to
augment the fears of the sea which were
commonly entertained in those days,
giving birth to many of the inytiis of
ocean. They told about the strange land
Inhabitated by lotos eaters, who fed upon
the fruit of forgetfuliiess ami lost nil
memory of country and friends. Hey
ond wns the terrible land of the one eyed
giants, culled Cyclois, they said, while
elsewhere were to lie found the strange
islands where the enchantresses Circo
and Calypso lived. These islands were
in tho narrow western Mediterranean,
and beyond was the Cimmerian land,
where the people lived In dnrkness al
ways, Inhabiting gloomy caves.
There were the Sirens also, whose song
was death. They were condemned
die when n man should pass them with
out stopping. Ulysses accomplished this
by putting wax in his ears. So they
were changed into rocks of Sorrento,
whore they still exist a terror to mari
ners. The Siroiis ty;ify the surf, whose
harmonious murmurs are often the death
musio of tho sailor. In like manner the
Cyclops represent the Storm Fiend, as
their names show. Brontes is the roll,
Stcropcs the flash and Argis the white
ness of lightning.
Likewise tho snaky Gordons are
thought to bo figurative representations
of tho white caped and nngry waves.
Not less to be feared were the dreadful
Symplegiides huge moving rocks which
were fabled to crush ships passing be
tween them. It has been surmised that
tho tradition respecting these rocks wiu
derived from the floating Icebergs, which
during tho glacial period must have
issued from the Black sea; hnt this seems
hardly likely. Washington Star.
A Wonderful Rattler.
"I once knew an old unreconstructed
Confederate in Arkansas who had a
colony of rattlesnakes that were trained
to play 'Dixie' with their rattles to his
intense edification," said Colonel J. 8.
Evans, of Meridian, Miss.
"Tho man belonged to my regiment
during the war, and he hud a rattle
snake that followed him all through the
Louisiana campaign liko a faithful dog,
He didn't join tho army until near the
close of tho troublo, and he brought his
snake with him. When the reptile got
tirod on tho march her master would
coil her around his neck and trudge
along with his pet until camp was
struck. At night he put the snake in a
circle formed with a hair rope, so as to
keep her from crawling around to the
dread of other soldiers. During battle
that suako would dart in and out be
tween the ranks of the fighting men un
til she found her master, when sho
would stick her tail straight into the nir
and rattlo off tho first few bars of 'Dixie'
with pronounced distinctness and the
most ecstatic delight. Her muster had
of course taught her to do it.
"After the war he took his snake back
to the Arkansas farm, and in a little
while her progeny was wonderful. When
I went to see him fifteen years ago his
barnyard was given over to rattlesnakes,
and on n signal from him, by ringing n
bell, tho reptiles would dash to tho cen
tor of the yard, and the clang of 'Dixie'
that the swift movements of their tails
producod was as deafening as it was in
spiring." St Louis Globe-Democrat.
The tiiilllotlne and Its Inventor.
One, of tho most widely disseminated
of popular errors is that Dr. Guillotin
invented the grim machine which still
bears his name. The real inventor of
this sinister contrivance was Dr. Louis,
a well known medical man and perma
nent secretary of the Parisian School of
Medicine, or Academie de Medicine.
Dr. Guillotin, who died in 1814, encr
getically but vainly protested against
the use of his name in connection with
this disagreeable subject an evidence,
if one were wanted, of the great diffi
culty there is of correcting a popular
error. Needless to say that the legend
that Dr. Guillotin was among the vic
tims of his friend's ingenious and merci
ful instrument of destruction is wholly
apocryphal. He died at a good old age,
and in his bed, surrounded by his chil
dren who, however, obtained permission
to change their name. London Satur
day Review.
Tha Difficulty with Chlneae.
The difficulty of a foreigner learning
the Chinese language may be inferred
from the statement of an English trav
eler. He and his companion, previous
to starting for China, had supplied them
selves with a Chinese grammar. In a
day or two tho discovery was ruado that
tho single letter i had 145 ways of being
pronounced, and that each pronuncia
tion had an entirely different meaning.
Then it dawned upon them that there
was no poetry about tho Chinese lan
guage, that it was not worth learning
and their grammar was secretly con
signed to the river mud by being drop
ped overboard. Yankee Blade.
llaw Kngliih Statesmen Get Recreation.
Of present English colobrities Mr.
Cliiunberloin is au amateur horticultur
ist; Sir John Lubbock passes the flying
momenta in studying his ants and bees;
Mr. Black eniovs vachtinir am., in- th
Hebrides, and many of the nobility have
a pronounced fancy for horse racing.
Hygiene.
UNDERSTOOD POLITICAL ECONOMY.
lt Takes a Woman in Pi-tu !.!," fhai
Raid, aa aha Heard Him ftnore.
When Fitzboodlo came homo that
night he sunk into a chair and nnid:
"Maria, I have lost my job.
"Is It possible?" exclaimed the woman.
"It is, Maria, nad with only ten dol
lars In cash things look pretty black."
'Yes. said the woman v;;nely.
'It is the ten dollars I gnve Von this
morning, Maria; you know I told you nt
the time it wns all I had In the world.
Yon are so good to me, Maria; yon keep
my money so well."
"Yes, she said feebly.
"I feel dreadful," he went on. "Do
you know, ns I passed the grocer's ha
glared nt me like mad. We owe him
thirteen dollars, and have promised to
settle eleven times now."
'Oh, Hint's all right," said tho woman,
brightening. "Why, when I was in
there at S o'clock he smiled and was so
pleasant sugar wouldn't melt In bis
month. He told me to order a big bill
of goods at any time."
'Yon are crazy, Maria! And then the
doctor. Why, I ran plump into him as
I turned tho corner; he shot mo a savage
look ns much as to say, 'Hnmph, 1 think
it Is about time yon cashed npP Maria,
I am n ruined man!
"Oh, no, Charlie. Why, when 1 met
the doctor on the avenue at 8 o'clock he
bowed like a prince and came over and
shook my hand and said 1 never looked
more charming in my life. 1 am sure
we can stand him off another three
months."
"Yon are clean mad, Maria. And
then tho landlord. How ho snapped his
teeth as I passed him in the hall leading
to this flat only a few moments ngo."
"Why, if yon mean dear Mr. Trotter,
the owner of the property, why, my
dear fellow, he is as sweet and good as
yon conld wish. Why, this afternoon
he came in and said he would get ns
new enrtuins, fix up tho cellar, repapw
the halls and fix tho plumbing in tho
kitchen. We can hold him off half the
summer, I lielieve."
"You are clean crazy, woman! I nei it
heard of such a thing. Give me thai
ten dollars till I go down and givehaU
to the grocer and half
"I I haven't it!"
"What?"
"1 I spent it."
"Spent it? How dare yon? And the
last money I had in this world."
"Oh, cheer up, Charlie. I took the
ten dollars and bought that lovely new
hat you promised me. I wore it ont on
the avenue nil afternoon. Everybody
who saw me said: 'My stars! why, old
Fitzlraodlo must be making lots of cash,
for K there isn't his wife all togged ont
in tho latest millinery, with gloves to
match!" The effect was like a charm,
Charlio. I knew yon had lost your
piace, ana i uiu u ns an act in poucy.
When I called on the tradespeople they
all lu ted the same as the Deonle on the
avenue. Now go to bed, dear, and never
again say I do not know all about po
litical economy!"
"Never," ho said, falling into her arms.
"Oh, it taken a woman to scheme!"
she ejaculated, as she heard him snoring
half an hour later. New York Recorder.
A Strange Animal.
A nsefnl South American animal is
the kinkajon, which, aa the dictionary
will tell you, is a procyoniform quad
ruped with a protrusile tongue and a
prehensile toil. Under ordinary circum
stances if yon were to meet a kinkajon
in the street yon would look for an Ital
ian with a hand organ, thongh I should
be inclined to look for a policeman, be
cause 1 know how unpleasant the ani
mal can be, particularly in the fruit
season, for the kinkajon loves fmit and
eats all he can find. The chief reason
for asserting that tho kinkajon is useful
is that in addition to bis fondness for
fruit he has a great liking for insects for
lunch, and when tamed is a valuable
assistance in southern homes, where fly
paper is unknown and where a mosquito
net is more expensive than a silk dress.
It has always seemed strange to tna
that some enterprising person has not
imported a few thousand of these insect
eaters from South America for use in
North American summer hotels. They
conld not cost more than $100 a dozen,
and many people would rather pay that
amount than spend the night with a
swarm of mosquitoes and unprovided
with means of defense against them.
Harper's Yonng People.
A Competent Teacher.
The London Times once contained an
advertisement for an assistant "capable
of teaching the classics as far as Homer
and Virgil." Among the answers re
ceived was this delightful specimen:
"Sir With reference to the advertise
ment which was inserted in The Times
newspaper a few days since respecting a
school assistant, I beg to state that I
should be happy to fill that situation;
but as most of my friends reside in Lon
don, and not knowing how far Homer
and Virgil is from town, I beg to state
that I should not like to engage to teach
the classics farther than Hammersmith
or Turnhaiu Green, or at the very ut
most distauce farther than Brentford.
Awaiting your reply, I am sir, etc."
Thumb Klnga.
In the Seventeenth century rings were
frequently worn upon the thumb.
"When I was about thy years, Hal,"
says tho Fat Knight, "I was not an eagle's
talon in tho waist I could have crept
Into an alderman's thumb ring1." Thomas
A. Beckett's thumb ring, given to him
by the king of France, was graced with,
a ruby the size of a hen's esrir. Irish
Time.