AGE SIX THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 1912. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAArf r n Incorrigible f Siic Effected a Result by a Stroke of Genius By F. A. Alitchel .TYYYTVVVVYYVTVVVTVWVYVY'i Knto Traccy ns a Sf lo nirl was nn Incorrigible tomboy. Slit1 climbed trcos, rode tlie horses to water (straddle) and would hnvo played baseball If she could liavo found enough girls similarly minded to innkc up the necessary teams. Furthermore, she was care less, scatter brained and generally rep rehensible. Neither lior father nor her mother could do anything with her. Scoldings bad no effect. Punishment Bho laughed at, UYorring that she ou Joyed It. Altogether Kate was by 110 means a model girl unless n model of all that a dutiful child should not bo. Nevertheless her parents ndorod hor. If sho left her room in disorder to go out to the barn to piny bide and seek with the boys they tisod to treat her ns ono of their own number her moth er, if tho housemaid was otherwise on gaged, would put things to rlfhts, moaning that sho was obliged to do so, but unablo to provide against her daughter's doing tho same thing again. Her father would endeavor to show her how selfish was this conduct nnd how it troublod hor mother, but scorn ed unable to impreas her with a sons of her fault, or, If he did, it was of no avail, for her only reply -was, "I forgot It." No matUr how severely he scold ed her, within a fow minutes after ho had finished she would be In his lap with her arms around his neck, appar ently forgetful of her offense. Kate never "talked back" to her par ents except under one condition. Situ had a pet dog, which sho loved better than all the world beside. If any ono. even her father or mother, punished tho dog for 11 misdemeanor Kate would rebel. Then there would bo trouble in tho family sure enough, for if thero is ono thing a parent knows that he should not slur over it is rebellion on the part of his child. Whon the dog was suffered to go In peace Kate -would beg pardon according to tho formula laid down for her, but there would bq no evidence of repentance in her words. One of Kate's peculiarities when she was passing from childhood to woman hood was a fascination for the fire de partment. The moment she would hear the first tap of tho signal bell she would listen, counting tho strokes, and when they were finished, without referring to the book of districts, sho could locate tho fire. Not far from her home was a hook and ladder house. Tho first time her father knew of her fire proclivities ho was coming homo ono evening while an alarm was being struck. The hook and ladder couveyanco was coming down tho street, tho horses galloping, the gong clanging, dogs barking, and what was the father's astonishment to see his little daughter running beside the truck. A man standing on the foot board reached down, swung her up beside him, and tho wholo passed out of sight. Tho scolding Kate received that evening was more impressive than any before delivered. Nevertheless at tho next alarm tho action was repeated, and it soon becamo a regular thing to see her mounted on the ladders, held there by n fireman, whenover tho equip ment was hurried to a fire. She was made an honorary member of the com pany, and whon sho reached an ago when such action could no longer be tolerated they presented hor with a gold badge. But sho never got over her penchant for going to Area and at on alarm even at tho dead of night would put her head out of the window to discover the location of the burning building. Every one was curious as to what sort of person Kate would turn out when sho came to tho ago of discretion. In oue respect, and one respect only, there was a great change. Whenever sho troubled her parents she was very much troubled herself. Though sho continued to worry them by her antics, sho was always truly repentant Her father finally came to believe that she couldn't help it and endured it Her mother believed sho could help It, con tinued to mourn her daughter's per vcrseneas and waited upon her and obeyed her as though sho were her maid instead of her parent. Knto had always been a favorite with boys and whvn grown drow young men to her as lovers. When lectured upon tho subject sho averred aho couldn't help it; tho fault was not here, but the men'B. No ono believed her except her father, but whothcr ho understood her better than other persons or wbeth r sho was capablo of innking him be lieve white was black, nnd vice versa, nobody knows. Ho was certainly not un unbiased Judge. Bo this as it may, every now nnd again some young fellow would make Kate's acquaintance, suddenly becomo very attentive and after nwhllo drop out nnd sho been a beauty or rich those about her could hnvo understood what was tho attraction; but, since sbo was plain and without fortune, no ono could givo a reason for it Bho was not a girl to permit familiarities, so that this could not bo taken into ac count The truth Is Kate Traccy was n child of nature not governed, as other peo ple are, by such precepts na nro laid down In well regulated households, but subject to her own whims. Tho world loves novelty. In Koto tho young men (Uncovered novelty enough for n dozen girls. They found waywardness, un consciousness of her own peculiarities and innocence. Compared with other girls she was like n glittering gam to a lump of coal. All that glitters may not be gold, but boast bird nnd man kind from tlimi Immemorial Iihtu been attracted by Hint which shlneu rather thnn that which Is somber. Kate turned off suitors In droves without even incurring tho slightest blame from any of them. Sho was obliged to Inflict some grievous wounds, but always managed to apply n balm that averted a chnnjro from love to hate. However, the day ar rived when two lovers camo down upon her fit tho samo time, and she was norcly puxzled. JnmcH Tlsdalo and Ernest Brown were the two young men simultane ously struck by Kate Tracey's charms. Since she wanted neither of them it was not possible for her to docido be tween them. Unfortunately Bho did not know of the rivalry and bitter an imosity that had sprung up betwoon them. One evening she was struck with astonishment upon receiving an anonymous note informing her that the rivals were intending to fight for her in nn oponlng in a wood bosldc tho rlTcr, a necluded spot nbout a mile from tho town, at 5 o'clock In tho morning. This was a stumper for Kato. Tho Idea of bloodshed occurring on ber ac count appalled her. Her first lmuulso was to tell her fathor, but he bad warned her time and again aralnit bo lnjr drawn Into complications with men who wished to marry her, and xho dreaded lest bo should blame her. Sho fretted till late at night before coming to any declnlon, then struck a plan that reflected her own peculiar genius. Sallying forth, she went to the build ing of the hook and laddor company. The mon were sitting around la arm chairs, but when they saw their fem inine honorary member enter each and every man rose and saluted- Kato nodded to them and went straight on to the office of their captain. After half an hour's conference Kato emerged from the hook and laddor house attended by the commander, who insisted on icolng her heme, no left ber at her door and returood to tho engine house, whllo Kato went to bed. At 4 o'clock sho aroo, dreeeod her self, crept softly downstairs and went out into the street No one was about at that early hour, nil being stowed away in bed, but at the corner sho found the captain of tho firo depart ment with a carriage and several of his men with a Are engine. Kate en tered the carriago with tho captain, and, followed by tho fire engine, tlicy were driven out of town. Just before 5 o'clock it was coming daylight tho dueling parties were on the ground making preparations for the encounter. An attempt was made by the seconds to effect a reconciliation, stating that the affair would appenr at least ridiculous and might result in a tragedy. But a man will make a guy of himself about a woman, especially when he has a rival, quicker and more obstinately than for any othor cause, and neither of the principals would budge. The ground was paced, the positions marked and the men placed upon them. But Just as a signal to fire was to be given one of the seconds called a halt. The rising sun was shining in his prin cipal's eyes. A new arrangement was made, and the contestants wcro placed differently. Tho delay proved fortunate. Just ns they were about to receive the signal to fire a carriago drovo up, followed by a flro engine. Kate Traccy and the captain of the hook and ladder company Jumped out of the carriage, nnd nt an order from the latter the en gine began to play a stream of water on the duelists. In a few seconds they were drenched, nnd, since the water was not overwarm, they shivered. But tho firemen played on till Kato called a halt "Shake hands," she said. Neither of the principals would. They seemed chiefly concerned about the ridiculous figure they cut Every ono on the ground except themielves was laughing. Kate told the firemen to continue the douche for awhile, then renewed the order to shake hands. But another wetting was necessary before they would obey. Then, upon the as surance of all concerned that the af fair should proceed no further, Kato and her attendant returned to the car riage and, followed by tho firemen, drove back to town. Though Kate had pledged all the fire men not to divulge tho nffalr, it was too good for the seconds to keep. It got into the newspapers, nnd the first knowledge of it that Mr. and Mrs. Traccy received was through this source. "What shall wo do with her J" ex claimed tho father in perplexity. "Oh, heavens! I don't know unless wo shut her up in a lunatic asylum," replied the mother. But tho Idea of shutting the young lady In an nsylum was not to be con sidered, her father averring that ns chief lunatic she would assume a lead ership of her fellow prisoners and tako command of the Institution. But ho agreed that since thero was nothing positively bad In his daughter's make up. It would be better to "give hor her head" und let her set her own pace. However, soon after tho crowning eplsodo of her single life, in which Miss Kato extinguished a rivalry for her hand with cold water, sho fell deeply in love with and was married to a young man who is a model of sobriety and steadiness, no has beard about his wife's escapades before hor mar riage nnd can't exactly understand them. lie says ho doesn't see what all tho fuss and worry were nbout lie doesn't see anything tho matter with hex. DAMES AND DAUGHTERS. Mrs. Klmer Nutting of Cambridge. Mass.. is snld to have the largest col lection of poHtcnrdH In tho world. It number more thnn ao.000 specimens. Mrs. Chniig. widow of a Chinese offi cial, W tin editor In chief of tho Peking woman'- paper, which Is devoted en tirely to subjects interesting to her sex. Mme. dc Housard. a heroine who nursed BrlUsh soldiers with Klorcnce Nlithtlnealo in tho Crimean war, is now. at the age of eighty-four, living in nn obscure qunrtcr of Cairo, Egypt, In sickness nnd want It is sold. Tho Duches3 of Frfc. who recently attained her twenty-first birthday. Is owner of ono of tho largest estates in north Britain, comprising nearly 200,- 000 acres of cultivated land, mountain. moor and forest. She inherited tho vast estates and groat riches of her father. Tho duchess is fond of out door sport. Mrs. Lydin It. Kompcr, n sccntlst of note, has received unusual recognition in Germany, tho emperor having re cently conferred on her tho title of "profossor." Though born in Russia, she has lived practically all of her life In tho United States and has occupied a chair nt the University of Pennsyl vania. Mr. Kemper is now In Berlin pursuing scientific investigations. Sporting Notes. Danny Murphy, captain of the Ath letics, owing to tho injury to his leg probably never will be able to play baseball again, but he will retain his connection with the Athletics in tho capacity of a scout First Baseman Myers of the Spokane club of the Northwestern league has established a new league base stealing record, stealing 118 bases. The former record of 10.r bases was held by Zim merman of the Chicago Nationals. Ted Meredith, tho champion runner, will not 1h on tho Pennsylvania fresh man football team this season. Mere dith wanted to play, but after writing to Trainer Mike Murphy ho learned that he would take on flesh if he play ed football and this might interfero with his running. Current Comment. Scientists are still trying to produce life artificially while moralists are la menting that life is too nrtificial. Brooklyn Standard Union. All tho country has spent on its schools does not appear to have gone far toward educating the hazing prac tice out of bWng. Denver Republican. Onco more the time honored question arises, this time in Paris: What sort of a man understands women? The man who never boasts about it De troit Free Press. A speaker nt the national congress of hygiene says the United States leads the world In deaths. The professor might have stated tho fact more pleas antly by saying we lead the world in everything. New York Telegram. Short Stories. The United States spends 515,000,000 a year to see baseball games. The Russian government has put the sable hunters out of business for three years. From deep water in the Atlantic to deep water in tho Pacific the Panama canal will be fifty miles in length. The kitchens of the Emperor Francis Joseph's palace at Budapest are con sidered to bo tho most modern nnd In every way the finest in Europe. In tho United States there is one law yer for every 700 persons, in England there is one to each 1,100 of popula tion, in Franco ono to 4,100 and In Russia ono to 30,000. Cost of Living. The official government report shows that tho high cost of living is almost equal to the cost of high living. Chi cago Inter Ocean. Now that a government commission has made an exhaustive cxamlnaUon nnd reported thereon, the public sus picion Hint the cost of living is high has been confirmed. Philadelphia Ledger. It is true living costs more than it used to. Tho federal bureau of labor has issued a report confirming th rumor. Wo had hoped the story mlghf at last have turned out to have been unfounded. Chicago Record-Herald. Town Topics. Chicago Is n queer city. It has even gono bo far ns to forbid "ad." displays in street cars. Boston Journal. Baltimore policemen must not play domluos on Sunday. Probably it is tho ono game that they don't play at all. Mllwaukeo Sentinel. Boston women nro doing their own marketing nnd receiving lots of noto riety becauso of it. Tho wonder In Cloveland la that such a commonplaeo should deserve reporting. Cleveland Plain Dealer. Aerial Flights. Tho nlr continues to bo n poor plnco in which to do fancy work. Chicago Record-Herald. Thero may bo advancement in nvla tion, but nt what cost of llfo! New York American. Doing fancy "stunts" in nn nero piano is taking dangerous chances, of courso, but even tho man who doe? nothing but plain, everyday, unorna mental aviating is not regarded by tho llfo Insurance companies as a safe risk. --Chicago Tribune. P ' Amertoans and Soap. f Thero Li a serious absence of caka Soap from the hotels on tho tourist belt of west Scotland, and nearly all of the soap supply Is in liquid or powder form. A correspondent of tho London Chron icle reports that tho spray nnd tho tric kle were safeguards against tho Van keen. No American tourists, he wnH told, cau sco a hotel cake of soap with out putting it in his pocket, provided ho is unobserved. "They nro n splen did people to deal with," said oue of tho hotel keepers, "but unchained, port able soap Is their undoing." "That matter of soap is ono of tho International quarrels of manners," oli serves the Chronicle. "The whitest American Ls ns dishonest nbout n enke of soap ns tho blackest of his com patriots Is nbout chickens. He will Btonl nnybody's cake of soap. "And JUBt across the channel you find countries whore you carry your own soap nnd would ns soon think of a public cake of soap as of n public toothbrush." When Right Seemed Wrong. Brown, a stranger In n Canadian city, stopped a pert looking newsboy and asked directions to n well known park. He grew wrathy ns ho repented the urchin's Instructions. "Tako uny old street car," Brown echoed. "Yes." "And nt the end of tho line change to the first yonng street car. Is that whnt you said?" "Yes," nmtwored tho boy, with n grin. Then lie shied off nt the gcntlemnn's gesture toward his cheek. "You'd better run," Brown called af ter him. "You needn't try your smart tricks on me or I'll thrash you." He walked nwny, stopped at u newsdeal er's to buy a city guide and found tho directions to tho park as follows: "Take any Olde street enr to end of line, then chaugo to Yongo." New York Press. When Hoops Bogan. When were hoops "In" for the first time? According to Strutt, "trundling the hoop is n pastimo of uncertain or igin, but much in fashion nt present" (1801). Dr. Murray's dictionary, inci dentally remarking that the orlginnl hoop affected by boys was a barrel hoop, gives no English reference to It earlier than 1702. But the hoop was well known to ancient Greek and Ro man boys, who called It n "trochus" (wheel). Their hoops were mndo of bronze, nnd representations of them on gems show that they were driven by a little hook with a wooden handle, very like the modern boy's hoop stick. This was called by tho Greeks "elater" (driver) and by the Romans "clavls" (key). Sometimes the ancient hoop had bells nttached to It Loudon Mail. Order of Gybgoggles. "The g.vbgogs?le is one of the rarest and most curious animals in existence and is found only in Madagascar and a part of Australia." didactically began Professor Llckclpher, tho schoolmaster, during a recent session of tho Sit and , Argue club. "It is a sort of a vampire, I something like a cross between a kan-1 garoo and an enormous bat, and can swim and fly with equal ease. It" "Fine, fine!" snarled the old codger, 1 whoso rheumatism was hectoring him with unusual severity. "Swell name for n new lodge 'The Concatenated Order of Philanthropic Gybgoggles, or some-1 thing of the sort and what a Jo-darter , of an emblem a little gold gybgogglo would make to wear on our watch Jobs!" Kaunas City Star. Royalty's Game. Cards have always been a royal game. Qncen Elizabeth played cards and lost her temper over them fre quently. She was no Anno of Austria, to play "like a queen, without passion of greed or gain." In her reign was commanded to bo played "at Wynd aore a Comedle or Morrnl devised on tho gamo of cardee," which resulted In the performance by tho children of her majcety'fl chapel of "Alexander and Campnspe," In which thh pretty lines occur: Cupid and my Campnspe played At cards for klsees. Cupid paid. London Chroulcle. Agin the Government. "What do you t'luk of dls gov'meut ownership idea, Weary?" "My experience makes mo agin it" "Your experience?" "Yes; do gov'ment runs do Jails, don't dey? Well, do way dey does It don't make no hit wit me." Boston Transcript His Art. Mrs. Syllle My husband takes a deep Interest In nrt. Mrs. Oldar You I surprise me. Mrs. Syllle Well, It wns a surprise to me, but I heard him tell ing Jack Rownder last night that it was a good thing to study your hand before you drnw. Sarcastic. "That's arrant nonsense," said Mr. Henpeck, "about there always being room nt the top." "Oh," ills wlfo sarcastically replied, "when were you up there to boo?" Tough Luck, Blx Picked up a five dollar bill this Morning. Dlx Lucky dogl Blx Lucky nothing! Right behind mo was a chnp I owed a fiver to, and ho boned mo for it Boston Transcript Two Passions, Mrs. Prosy Reading ls qulto a pas sion with my husband. Mrs. Dresser So It Is with mlno when ho reads my milliner's bills! In tho court of his own conscience fc) guilty mnn Is acquitted. Juvenal. t Adveriisemonts I 1 1 Under Provision of Post Of- t 2 llco Appropriation Bill of Aug. t -I, 11MB. o-f o-fo-fo-fo-f o-fo-fo-f o-fo-fo-fo-fof o FOR REPRESENTATIVE HON. II. C. JACKSON, A Man That Can bo Depended Upou. That Is the principal thing. Hon. H. C. Jnckson, the subject of this brief sketch, has onco been elected to tho olllco of Representative In gen oral assembly at Harrlsburg and ow ing to his good record established his friends have renominated him to that office and on November 5 pro pose to again elect him to this high office. Hon. H. C. Jackson favors lo cal option, ho favors home rule and In fact anything that will in any way benefit tho peple of his home county, who by their votes will return him to the Legislature. A man who votes for Mr. Jackson votes for him self and his own best Interests. Advertisement. HON. JOEL G. HILL. Democratic Candidate for Congress man of this Congressional Dis trict. Wayne county has not had a repre sentative in Congress for over thirty years. Her people now have an op portunity to secure one who is in every way worthy of their votes. He is no stranger to Wayne counteans, having faithfully and honestly serv ed Wayne county as Associate Judge, County Commissioner and also State Senator In Harrisburg. All of these positions wero filled by him with credit to himself and honor to his constituency. Ho is a man of the most sterling honesty and Integrity, and will discharge faithfully every duty entrusted to him. Farmers, who bear tho heaviest burdens of taxation, are not represented in the lawmaking bodies of the country to tho extent they should ho, nnd this fact affords ono of the best reasons why Mr. Hill should bo elected. Ho is also a veteran of tho Civil war, and becauso he helped as n soldier to preserve tho Union, he deserves tho united support of his fellow countrymen. Advertisement. McCalPs Magazine and McCall Patterns For Women Have More Friends than any other magazine or patterns. McCall's is the reliable Fashion Guide monthly in ono million one hundred thousand homes. Besides show ing all the latest designs of MiCall Patterns, each issue is brimful of sparkling short stories and helpful information for women. Snve Montr nd Keep in Style by lub tcribingfor McCjII'j Mjgarine ituncc. C m only 50 cents a year, including any one of the celebrated McCjU Patterns free. McCall Patterns Lead all others In atv'e, fit. simplicity, economy and number suid More dealers sell McCall Patterns than any otherUonukescombined. Nonehlgher tluii 1 5 cents. Uuy from your dealer, or by mail fium McCALL'S MAGAZINE 236-246 W. 37th St, New York City WT-SwjpltCcP7, Pimlti Ct.UU.fn mJ PttUn CaOiofu I fit, ratjuMt. Joo Wood's Ciraiidfather Played Ball. Hon. Ahram Decker, an aged resi dont of Port Jorvis and former As Bomhlyman, who know tho family of Pitcher Joo Wood Intimately, says Bradner Wood, tho grandfather of loo, w8 a man of romarkablo phy sical strength nnd athletic powors. Ouo of his feats wns that of Jump ing out of ono barrol into another. Ho was also an exvert in tho gamo of ball as playod In early days, thus foreshadowing tho farao of his cele brated grandson. Ho taught school n early llfo and Mr. Decker, who was ono of his pupils, says ho was tho best school teacher ho over knew, Tho Woods, ho adds, woro all fine, large, strong men, well en dowed mentally as well as physically. FOR CONGRESSMAN PROFESSIONAL CARDS. Attorncys-at'Lnw. TT WILSON, J-L. ATTOKNKY A COONSKLOn-AT-LAW wince numccni 10 rost OUlco In I) Hum c uunu. jiuiirsiiiue. i'u. TSl. H. LEE, T ATTOKNEY A COONBKLOIt-AT-LAW Oillcenver post ofllce. All Irani buslnes inuinmo uvii'uuvu 10. iioni-siuue, ra. n. C. MUMFOUD, JLi. ATTORNEY A COt'KHEI.OH-AT-I.AW Olllce Liberty Hnll bulldlnc. oDuo.sltc lh 'ost Ollire. Ilonesiinlc. 'a. ITOMEK GREENE. II ATTntlVtfV J. rnrlvarfnn.iT.t , ,. Omco: Rolf Building, Honesdalo. f tiiARLEs a. Mccarty, ATTOKNKY A COL'NSELOK- IT-I.AW C-nlnl I ,1 .1 1 tuiiecuou oi claims. Olllco: Relf Building, Honesdalo l If E. SIMONS. I 111 on it. Mm I 'n - 1 I m n - 1 1 I 1 I'n. i 1 ClEARLE & SALMON, OOicca latelv occupied by J ml re Scarle nHESTER A. GARRATT. Ofllce aillacent to Post Ofllrp. Itmip.rlnlo i Dentists. DR. E. T. BROWN, DENTIST. rfTttA ti'l,., t Kl ..',...! - r, v 1 mi;, nuiiusuuie. ra, R. C. R. BRADY, DENTIST, HONESDALE, PA. 1011 MAIN ST. Citizens' Phone. Physicians. T B. PETERSON, M D. i . !l5fiftTV qthpvt llnvpanir.v PI es civeti caremi uiieutinn. IIVERY F. G. RICKARD Prop MRST-CLASS WA(.O.VS, RELIABLE HORSES. Especial Attention Given Transit Business. STOKE BRN church street W. C. SPRY 15 EACH LAKE. AUCTIONEER HOLDS SALES ANYWHERE IX STATE. fc lltl Allf AH 1 n . 1 . vvcovcr Architect and Builder Plans & Estimates Furnished Residence, 1302 EastSt. EIR 65 YEARS' experience: Tnot Marks Designs COPVTIIOHTS SlC. Anrona sending nketrh nnd description mar milftklv Aar-artnhi ntir miliiliin frea whether AD ttiTciiuon Is probnbtr putentithlA. Coniniunlcn. tlnnsstrlctlrronfldeiitlal. HANDBOOK onl'atcnts soul iree. uiaesi affencr zorsecurmif p&ioms. Patents taken throush ilunn .t Co. receire special notice, without charge, la the Scientific Jftitcricnti. A handsomelf tllnstratrxl weeslr. Ir-at dr. cu latum of nnr x-leiHIdo Vnirnal. Terms, IS a year: four months, L Bold bjall newsdealers. MUNN&Co.3C'b'mi1"'' New York llranct) Often. ICS l fit- Waahlputon, D. C. J. E. HALEY AUCTIONEER Hnvo me ami save money. Wl attend sales anywhere in State. Address WAYMART. PA.CR. D. 3 .h m c r b la i b v if nil JUdtrn n. wtLbfi re Insurance The OLDEST Fire Insurance Agency in Wayne County. Olllco: Second floor Masonic Build ing, over C. C. Jadwia'fl drug store. Honesdalo. G. We wlsn to secure a good correspondent in every town in Wayne county. Don't be afraid to write this office for paper and stamped envelops . wkiAAiL ov sBsHr-in''.