AGE SIX THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 2, 1912. HflJ My I petitor 1 of Incroniniit; 1 .1.. Rv Philin Rosworth - u TTVVT7VVVT7VVVVVVVV7VVVV" r 1 1 . l ,. jl no u.xmR or juices iouiij is mi "li ferent from what It wns when I was n young man. At that time wo were cutting each other's profits down to n ii 1 - 1 ... neta But there were virgin fields In those days that had not been worked. One tulglit go Into n western town with a now kind of goods to sell, nud If they were salable ho would make a good profit on thorn. I served an appren ticeship with a lnrgo'soap manufactur ing concern and after having thorough ly learned the business concluded to go to some western stuto and build up n trade In the goods with which I was familiar. I settled in a town called Farnsworth. the center of a country that was rapidly growing In popula tion. I had been furnished with sonic means for advertising aud concluded to attract nttcntlon by unique notices. I remember the first one I Issued I considered very clever. It was, "Every patriot uses Gunter's soap, especially on Blrthington's wash day." I was disappointed to find that the plain, un educated people of that region did not see the humor of my ad., for those who mentioned it to mo asked who Blrth lngton was. After explaining to most of the citizens of the town that Blrth ington's wash day was a transposition of Washington's birthday I concluded to try something else. One morning I noticed that I had n rival in the soap business in the neigh boring town of Mlllvllle. Not only had I a rival in the business, but in clever advertising. In a Mlllvllle newspaper I saw that R 15. Ketcham was selling SouthwicU's soap, advertising it to "wash out freckles, leaving the skin n beautiful pink and white." 1 con sidered this ridiculous till a number of the freckled boys and girls of the town came into my store and asked if I had any of that soap that would "get away with freckles." I made my next effort more prac tical. I advertised Gunter's soap as the "whitest wash" a housewife could use. This produced an immediate ef fect, for several women came Into the store and bought my soap to use in whitewashing their cellars. The next advertisement of Ketch am's that I noticed was after a storm and a consequent carrying away of a portion of the turnpike between Rirns worth and Mlllvllle by the giving way of a culvert. Ketcham announced that the washout had been effected by a cako of Southwlck's soap having fall en out of the wagon of a farmer who had just bought it aud was carrying It to Farnsworth to wash away the spots loft by an application of the Gun ter article. The public didn't exactly understand how a culvert could bo washed out with a cako of soap weighing only a few ounces, but the reference to spots loft by my goods was a stroke of genius on the part of Ketcham. It was not at that time oven the proper thing to attack In an advertisement or other Wise any individual goods. Indeed, 1 had cause for legal action against Ketcham for damages. So I concluded to drive over to Mlllvllle and Inform him that if he did. it again I would hale him into court I found his of fice in charge of a young woman, of whom I inquired when Mr. Ketcham would bo In. She asked mo what I wished to sco him for, and I told her that I was the agent for Gunter's soap at Farnsworth and would like to have a conference with him with a view to settling upon a method by which he and I could do business without injur ing eacli other. Tho young woman said that Mr. Ketcham was out most of tho tlmo so liciting orders for his soap and if In stead of waiting for him, which I might have to do for some time, I would say to her anything I had to communlcato she would transmit it to Mr. Ketcham. "Very well." I said; "please call his attention to tho fact that when ho ad vertises that Gunter's soap leaves spots, thus injuring its salo, ho lays himself Hablo to a suit for damages. There Is no law against his advertis ing that Southwlck's soap has pro duced a washout or that it is a white wash on tho best soap In tho market so long as ho doesn't cry down any other article. Do you understand?" "I'll tell Mr. Ketcham." "And say to him that If ho will corao over to seo mo I shall be happy to lis with him a scalo of prices by which wo shall bo governed, so that wo won't bo cutting each other's throats." "W-h-a-t?" "I mean that wo shall not bo under selling each other, Thcro's plenty of room for both, but if wo fight oach other we'll both fall." "I'll try to inako him understand." Tho girl, though sho appeared to bo stupid, was rather pretty. As I waa about todeavo I concluded to pay her a compliment, being a llttlo facetious as well, so I said: "I wouldn't uso Southwlck's soap on my faco if I wero you." ot?" sho asked. r complexion being perfect, ary." wash," sho replied. g. "(jompumenta aro iness." "Good morning! Tell Mr. Ketcham' to como over and sea me." j But Mr. Ketcham did not como to' see me. On the contrary, ho continued tho contest, wlUt u quarter. Uln next announcement wns that at a trial be tween Gunter's and Southwlck's soaps a cako of oath was thrown Into a tub of water and Southwlck's washed Gun ter's clean out of the tub. Many peo ple understood enough of this to sec VuVi. u.b' turned against mc Not only did ray sales fall off. but I ! found that a good many cakes of tho Southwlck nrtlcle were finding their way Into Farnsworth. It scorned to mo that I must do something to get the upper hand In tho struggle or go out of business. So, after racking my brain for awhile, 1 got a notice Insert ed in the newspapers of my town that there was no uso for our citizens to seek the seashore during tho summer. All they need do was to throw a cake of Gunter's soap Into Green's pond nnd the latter, breaking on tho shoro, would bo quite equal to any sea foam. What was my surprise, after my caution, to see a few days after this In sertion a notice in a Mlllvllle paper that tho agent of Guntcr's soap at Farnsworth had by mistake got hold of a cako of Southwlck's soap nnd wash ed himself out of business. This was too much, it was n false, malicious announcement. At any rate, many matter of fact people would so construe It I drove over to Mlll vllle resolved to put a stop to this libel ous way of competing for trade and straight to Ketcham's office. I found tho same girl there as before. "Where's Ketcham?" I Inquired im patiently. "What can I do for you? I'm In charge." "You can say to him that one more notice In n newspaper reflecting on mo or tho article I sell nud I shall nt ouce begin suit for damages." "How much will they bo?" "How much? Why, I shall sue for for perhaps as much as $20,000." "That would bo awful. I doubt if Mr. Ketcham could pay all that" "I didn't say I would be allowed that sum by tho court I said I would suo for that amount." "Oh! Well, I'll toll him." I stood looking at tho girl. As I have said before, sho was stupid look ing, but pretty. I should have a girl llko that In ray place of business; It would enable mo to get out more to drum up business. "Do you know," I asked, "of any young woman who would llko n posi tion with me at Farnsworth such as you have here with Mr. Ketcham?" "What would 'bo tho salary?" "I could make it $12 a week." She sat thinking awhile, then asked: "How would you llko to take over Mr. Ketcham's stock and run your and his business together? I think he'd like to soil." "For how much?" "He might turn over tho stock that he holds as agent and sell tho good will of the business for. say, $2,000." Two thousand dollars was a good deal, but he had worked up quite a trade, and if I should buy him out I would have the field to myself. I said I would think It over. I went back to Farnsworth and considered tho matter exhaustively. Somehow I had taken a fancy to Ketcham's clerk and believed that she would bo a great advantnge to me. Whenever I had gone to Mlll vlllo I had found Ketcham out work ing up trade, while I spent most of my tlmo in my shop. Finally I wrote Ketcham that I would give him $2,000 for tho good will of his business nnd tako his clerk nt a salary of $12 a week. By return mall I got papers assigning mo his business and n tele gram from his principals appointing me their agent in his place. I sent a check to his order for tho purchase money and asked him to ship hl3 stock nnd send his clerk to me. The stock arrived in duo time, then the girl. "Well, Miss" I began and waited for her to fill in her name. "Ketcham." "Aro you a sister of Mr. Ketcham's?" "No." "Any relation?" "No." "What are your initials?" "F. B." "The dickens!" Her hitherto sober faco broke Into n smile. "I suppose I may as well confess now ns at any tlmo. I've been running tho business over thero and at a loss. There's room for only one, and that one can't stay indoors and keep shop. Ho or she must bo out canvassing all thu while. Since your first visit I have been ulmlug to sell to you. You can now be .out all tho while, and I will run tho business inside. I would rath or have $12 a week than bo running behind." "And you'vo been smart enough to get $2,000 out of mo for a losing busi ness?" "Oh, you mustn't look at it in that way. I've sold you tho field." "And your ability as an advertise ment writer." "I'll do what I can for yon in that line." And sho did. I decided to concen trate on Gunter's soap, and so ingen ious wero Miss Ketcham's ads. that by constant canvassing I did remarkably welL My assistant kept on developing in her ability to vrrito original adver tisements, and they camo to bo looked for as funny matter. This didn't do tho sales of soap any harm. Indoed, it quadrupled tho valuo of tho ads. Fi nally, discovering that to part with my ad. writer -would bo to giro up tho greater part of my business, I married her. At tho tlmo of tho -wedding some wag of a reporter gavo an account of it undor tho caption, "Tho Bachelor hood Washed Out of a Man by Oun ter's Soap." TAFT WOULD AID FARMERS. Wants United States to Adopt Co-opeiativo Credit System. RESULT OF INVESTIGATION. State Department, at the President's Direction, Has Looked Into the Sys tem In Vogue In Europe It Would Moan Low Rates and Easy Term For Repayment. The state department's investiga tion of Kuropean systems of co-operative credit has now reached tho second stage In which n study Is made of tho mortgage bond societies and the mort gage banks. It is expected that this Is the form of co-operative credit which, under one plan or another, will be proposed for adoption In the United States In connection with President Tuft's efforts to extend this assistance to the American farmer. As compared to tho present Ameri can system of farm lnnd loans this form of co-operative credit would ac complish two things for tho farmer: First It would penult him to repay his loan through an easy system of amortization extending over a long pe riod of years and would removo effec tively tho menace of foreclosure or renewal which hnngs llko the sword of Damocles over the head of any bor rower from a private individual undet a short time mortgage. Second. It would unlock tho door of tho great money centers to thu farmer of tho remotest regions and give a security to the Investor in New York, so that ho would need have no concern with knowing anything of tha sort of security offered by tho farm lu Texas or Oregon on which tho money ho lends Is to be spent. This menus to the farmer low rates of Interest and easy terms for repay ment What It would mean In more specific terms to tho American farm er can bo easily seen In a comparison of conditions in Germany or France and in tho United States, nerc Is tho statement of a dealer In land mort gages in our southwest, made at a mooting in New York city. Tho speaker was describing the business of a company financed by British cap ital which makes mortgage loans on farms In tho southwestern states: "Wo have been loaning money at S, 0 and 10 per cent. I loaned money In tho Pnnhandlo twenty-seven years ago and for tho first threo or four years never got loss than 3 per cent a month. That is incident to a now country. Now our bank rate Is 10 per cent. Our land loans that wo havo been making tho first year or so through that sec tion of the country have been made on an 8 or 0 per cent basis. However, 1 am very frank to say that I think tho rates ought to como down and that wo ought to be ablo to get money from that section of tho country nt 0 or 7 per cent" In comparison with this statement the Credit Fonder of Franco Is able to loan money on farm lands at -1.3 per cent and tho German societies and banks at about -i or 4.5 per cent. As tho speaker quoted abovo says, the high rato of Interest In this country is probably to n largo extent duo to tho fact that It Is a now country nnd that money here Is more actively employed. It Is doubtful whether, even with the adoption of tho European machinery, tho interest rates on mortgages could bo brought down as low In tho United States as they are In either France or Germany. It Is the opinion of no loss nn authority than Charles A. Conant, however, that they could be brought down to 5 per cent A mortgage at 5 per cent with tho advnntago to tho farmer of repaying his loan llttlo by llttlo through an unburdensomo plan of amortization might bo accepted as tho sum total of benefit to bo expected by the American farmer from tho ndoptlon of some such system ns. for instance, the German mortgage bank plan. Another African Theodore. An African Theodore came to grief just forty-five years ago because ho thought ho was tho wholo show. The rest of mankind thought they were somo show, too, and Theodoro of Abys sinia learned too lato that ho had made a very serious mistake in not taking that very nntural attitudo into account. Nature has not given to any individual a monopoly of tho abilities requisite in tho rule of a people. A voto for tho Democratic ticket this fall Is a voto for freo trado nnd all that freo trado stands for. A voto for tho bull mooso ticket Is a voto for some thing which no one, not oven its pro moters, can glvo any light upon. A voto for tho Republican ticket is a voto for protection" to honest American toll, and protection is a synonym for prosperity. Nowport (N. H.) Cham pion. When WlUon Will Get Worse Left Woodrow Wilson complained that his privato car was loft several hours be hind by tho Chicago express. That's nothing to tho way ho nnd his freo trado crew will bo left behind by th Taft Republican express on Nov. 6. Mow to Grow Tall. A man's organs nnd thoo of his bones which nro not subjected to pressure grow continuously until he li forty years old that Is to say, tho heart should become stronger, the capacity of the lungs Increase nnd the brain should develop steadily until the fourth decade of life. Also one should wear a larger hat at tho age of forty than at thirty. A man ceases to grow tall, how over, at the beginning of the third dec ade, because after that time the down ward pressure exerted by the weight of tho body while in the erect position .empresses tho vertebrae or smnll lioncs In the spine, the disks of carti lage between them, the pelvis nnd tho thigh bones, and this pressure over comes the nntural elasticity of tho disks and tho growth of these bones. However, a British scientist contends; that were man a quadruped nnd there fore freed from the downward pres sure produced by his weight upon his spinal column he would continue to grow in height for ten years longer than ho does at present, since It has been found that bones not subjected to compression Increase up to the fourth decade. Chicago Tribune. Pretty Names For Books. Tho following nro some of tho curi ous titles of old English books: "A Most Delectable Sweet Perfumed Nosegay For God's Saints to Smell At." "Biscuit Baked In the Oven of Char ity, Carefully Conserved For tho Chick ens of tho Church, tho Sparrows of the Spirit and the Sweet Swallows of Sal vation." "A Sigh of Sorrow For tho Sinners of ZIon Breathed Out of a Hole In tho Wall of an Earthly Vessel Known Among Men by the Name of Samuel Fish" (a Quaker who had been Impris oned). "Eggs of Charity Layed For tho Chickens of tho Covenant and Boiled With the Water of Dlvhio Love. Take Ye Out and Eat." "The Spiritual Mustard Pot to Make the Soul Sneeze With Devotion." Most of these wero published in tho time of Cromwell. The Wearing of Hats. More or less of a modern habit is the constant wearing of hats. Even as Into as 1759 Horace Walpolo mentions ns a matter of course that he never wears a hat "Uemeniber," he says, writing to a friend notoriously careless about his dress, who was expected home from Holland, "everybody that comes from abroad is supposed to come from France, nnd whatever they wear at their first reappearance Immediately grows the fashion. Now If, as Is very likely, you should through inadver tence change hats with tho master of a Dutch smack in a week's time we shall all bo equipped like Dutch skippers. Y'ou seo, I speak very disinterestedly, for, as I never wear n hat myself, It Is indifferent to me what sort of a hat I don't wear." A Grand Scheme. Mr. Biggins had a scheme for pro tecting his house against burglars dur ing his absence from homo, but in spite of that his friend Mr. HIggins met him recently looking very down cast. "What's wrong?" queried Mr. HIg gins. "Oh, everything!" groaned Mr. Big gins. "You remember my scheme for keeping off burglars? Well, the secret of It was to leave n gas jet turned on, so that any burglar who entered would , bo asphyxiated by Uie fumes." i "Didn't it work, then?" "Oh, yes, It worked well enough too well. The burglar camo In with a ' lighted match, and we haven't been nblo to find him or tho house slnco." The Privilege of Peers. Thero is a curious case in Fortes cue's "reports" relating to tho privilege of peers, in which tho bailiff who ninny years ago arrested a lord was forced by Uio court to kneel down nnd ask his pardon, though ho alleged that he had acted by mistake, for that his lordship had a dirty shirt, a wornout suit of clothes nud only sixpence In his pocket, so that ho could not be lieve that he was a peer and arrested him through Inadvertence. Green. Bag. He Changed. "Greymalr's wife brought him homo a suit of clothes, but I understand ho mustered up tho courage to tell her that ho had made up his mind to change it." "Did ho change it?" "Oh, yes; he changed his mind." Hit It. "You can't guess what sister said about you Just boforo you camo In, Mr. nighcollar," said llttlo Johnnie. "I haven't an Idea lu the world, John nie." "That's It. You guessed It tho very first time." Domestic Bliss. Mr. Wyborn Ever slnco I married you I've drunk the cup of bitterness to tho dregs. Mrs. Wyborn Yes; Imagine you leaving a drain of auythlng In any cup! In the Same Class. "I havo a fishing boat nnd a chauf feur that nro both In tho snmo class." "IIow do you mean?" "I am always balling thorn out" So It Does. W uro told that tho "smallest hair throws a shadow." And so It docs. It throws n shadow over your appetite when you find it in your food. Inconsistency with ourselves is tho greatest wcakuess of human nature. Addison. TAFT GOOD TIMES. A Good Deal More Substantial Than Vilson Promise. There was an old song, n fnvorlto in tho days gone by, with the refrain, "Hard times como ngaln no morel" Wero It not for the dnrk cloud of Democratic free trade hovering nbovo tho horizon and tho possibility of Wil son for presldont with n cabinet of mossbneks from Uio south, with their heels on tho cabinet table and telling each other how much better tilings were "before tho wall," Americans might be singing that refrain with zest nnd gleo today, for from all parts of the Union comes assurance of better times than for years past, of pressing demands for goods of all kinds, abundant employment nnd ac tive nnd profitable trade. The large cities are thronged with buyers, and thero Is plenty of evidence that store keepers, big and small, In city and village and nt tho crossroads, havo money to spend and mean to spend It How different four years ago! The country was still lu the doldrums not yet emerged from the Itoosevelt panic of 10O7. Tho nation was looking for ward with hope and faith to tho elec tion of President Tnft then already recognized ns one of tho world's great est statesmen, safe. sane, broad minded, with nn Intellectual grasp equal to tho mighty task !oforo him nnd nn unsel fish devotion to tho welfare of all his fellow citizens. Tho nation's faith nnd hopo In President Taft were not misplaced. Gradually and surely the country has come out of distrust nnd despair into tho realization nnd enjoyment of over growing prosperity. Business has re covered confidence, labor finds profit able employment, nnd In somo parts tho demand for labor nt good wages Is greater than tho supply. President Taft has made good. Hard times have gone, never to return pro vided Taft is re-elected and allowed to give tho country four years more of sanity, safety and security. The frantic efforts of his predecessor to get n chanco to givo tho country another taste of 1007 excite no alarm tho American memory is not short enough for that But another gener ation has grown to manhood and tho ballot slnco tho last calamitous ex perience of Democratic low tariff in 1S91-7, and specious and Illusive free trade arguments are appealing to ears that never heard them before. There is every reason to believe, however, that tho sunshine of Taft's prosperity will clear tho beclouded sky, dissipate tho mist of Wilson free trade, and enablo tho younger voters to per ceive, as their elders know by ex perience, the folly of exchanging good times for conditions that In the past have brought ouly business collapse and general hardship and depression for everybody nnd loss of opportunity. f Saltl by dealers orerywhero Tho Atlantic Refining Company SHERIFF'S SALE OF VALUABLE REAL ESTATE. -By virtue of process issued out of the Court of Common Pleas of Wayno county, and State of Pennsylvania, and to me directed and delivered, I havo levied on asd will exposo to public sale, at the Court House in Honesdale, on FRIDAY, OCT. 18, 1012, 2. 1. 31. All the defendant's right, title and interest in the following described property viz: All that certain piece or parcel of land situate, lying and being In tho township of South Canaan, county of Wayne and State of Pennsylvania, hounded aud described as follows: Beginning at a corner in tho center of tho Belmont and Eastern Turn pike Road on a lino ot land leased by Fred Swingle to tho public for school purposes; thence along tho lino of said land south sixty-four and one-half degrees west flvo and three-quarter rods to a post corner; thenco south twenty-one degrees east along said leased land three rods and a half a quarter of a rod to post corner on a lino of land belonging to P. W. Lorch; thenco along said Lorch's land south forty-eight de grees west twenty-six rods to a stones corner; thenco alpng land formerly belonging to Frederick Swingle north thirty-threo degrees west twenty-one and one-half rods to a stones corner; thenco along said land north llfty-llvo and a quarter degrees east thirty-four rods to the center of the aforesaid turnplko road to a corner; thonco along the cen ter of tho aforesaid turnplko road south twonty-four dogrees east four teen and a quarter rods to tho placo of beginning. Containing threo acres and ono hundred perches, moro or less. Excepting ono aero nnd 155 porches which A. B. Stovons by deed datod Sept. 10, 190G, and re corded In D. B. No. 9G, pago G28, granted and conveyed to William McMlnn. On tho abovo premises, which Is all Improved land, aro modern creamory buildings, containing all necossary inaehtnory and appliances. Solzod and taken In oxocutlon as tho proporty of Tho Farmers' Co Oporatlvo Dairy Company, Limited, at tho suit of Charlos II. Baker, Clark Enslln, Harry Emery and F. H. Reed. No. 233 Juno Torm, 1912. Judgment, $1500. Greono, Attor ney. TAKE NOTICE All bids and costs must bo paid on day of salo or deeds will not ho acknowledged. FRANK C. KIMBLE, Sheriff. Honesdalo, Sopt. 23, 1912. ASK AMY HORSE Attorncvs-nt-Lnw. TT WILSON, XL. ATTORNEY A COUNfiEI.OIl-AT-LAW. Ollice adlncent to Post Oillco In Dimmlck uiucu, jiuurstiiuc, rn. TV r-M. II. LEE, ATTOKNKY A COUNHEt.nti.AT.t.AU. ortlec over post ollice. All local business promptly attended to. HonestnTe! 1. III C. MUMFORD, !i. ATTOKNKY A C( COlTNflEI.OII-AT-t.Au-. Olllrn I.ltinrtv Itnll hnlMI.it. .,..ul. .v.- Post Ollice. IIoiiesJKlcri'a. Jl OMER GREENE, ATTOKNKY A COUN8ELOR.-AT-I.AW Office: Rolf Building, Honesdalo. pHARLKS A. McCARTY, J ATTORNEY A COIJNREI.OIl- IT.I.lir Special nnd prompt nttcntlon Liven to the collection of claims. Oftico: Rolf Building, Honesdale, ME. SIMON'S, . ATTORNEY A COUN8ELOR-AT-LAW Office in the Court House, Honesdale Pa. Q1 EAR LIS & SALMON,' ij ATTORNEYS A COUNSEI.ORS-AT-LAW, OBlces lntclv occupied by Judge Searle rUIESTER A. GARRATT, J ATTORNEY A COUNSELOR-AT-LAW Ollice adlncent to Post Ollice, Honesdalc.Pa. Dentists. DR. E. T. BROWN, DENTIST. Office First floor, old Savings Bunk build Inc. Honesdale. l'a. R. C. R. BRADY, DENTIST, HONESDALE, TA. 1011 MAIN ST. Citizens' Phone. Physicians. 1) 15. PETERSON, M P. X . 1120 MAIN STREET. .(ONESDAI.E, PA. Kyeand Karn specialty. 1 u (Utlns of class es given careful attention. IVERY F. G. KICKARD Prop i FiiiST-rr. ass v,r.nv3 ----- ki;ijI.isi,k houses. Kspcclnl Attention Given to Transit Business. feSEIEZ222Eia ston; im ckurck street W. C. SPRY BEACH LAKE. AUCTIONEER nOLDS SALES ANYWHERE IN STATE. Architect and Guilder Plans & Estimates Furnished Residence, 1302 EastSt. OVER 05 YEARS' EXPERIENCE mm Trade Marks Designs Copyrights Ac. Anrono sending n sketch and description that quickly ascertain our ujninon freo whether an invention la probably paientaMi. Oonimunlea. linns PtrlctlyrontJdentliil. HANDBOOK ont'atcuts sent tree. Oldest aiiency for eecumitf patents. 1'atenta tukui tbrouuu iluim A Co. receive t pedal not ict, without clmrgp, mttio ciemmc jncan A handsomely illnstmt(d weekly. lowest c!r dilution of any poientlllo Journal. Terms, 13 a year: four niuntlii, f 1. tioM by ail newsdealer. fdUNN&Co.36'0 New York liraucb OCtco. eai V SU Wubloiitou. L. C. J. E. HALEY AUCTIONEER Hnve 1110 nnd snvo money. AVL attend wiles nnyuiicro In Stnto. Address WAYMART. PA.CR. D. 3 JOSEPH N. WELCH The OLDEST Fire Insurance Agency in Wayne County. Oillco: Second floor Masonic Build ing, over C. C. Jadwln's drug store, Honesdalo. G. We wlsli to secure a good correspondent in every town in Wayne county. Don't be afraid to write this office for paper and stamped envelops