PAGIC 0 THE CITIZEN, PllIHAV, AUGUST 11, 1011. JOHN H. GIBBONS. Superintendent of Naval Academy Who Entortalned Admiral Togo. Annapolis, Md.. Aug. a As Admiral Togo entered the Naval academy grounds the marine guard presented arms and the band playod the Jap anese national anthem. The admiral In white duck uniform accompanied by Lieutenant Panl' gnchl, bis naval aid, saluted, and the party went to the house of Superin tendent John H. Gibbons. Later the Japanese inspected the grounds and buildings of tho academy and held a reception at the officers' club. Tho admiral returned to Washing--ton and was the dinner guest of Sec retary Knox. Ho Took the Cue. Ho was a man who gave lltUo and got much. Today, for Instance, bo had got a clothes brush, a basin of water, a towel and a ehlno, and bo bad given nothing at all. Tr-r-r-ring! went his bedroom bell. The hotel attendant smiled sourly. Thl3 was tho fourth tlmo ho had been summoned, and bo did not harry. "I thought you wcro never coming," exclaimed tho visitor when tho at tendant appeared at tost. "Are you nicknamed 'Slowcoach? " "No, sir," answered tho attendant "They call mo 'Billiard coc." " "Billiard cneT repeated tho visitor, frowning. Then an Inspiration dawn ed. "Ah! Bocooso yoa'ro such a stick, I eupposoT" be asked. "Wrong again, slrl" returned tho at tendant. "Ifs because I work better with a good Op," Londoa Answers. I A Herculean Katydid, Experiments conducted by a natural ist attached to one of tho government's scientific bureaus at Washington ad-j ducod an interesting oxample of tho strength of tho katydid. He harness-! ed a katydid to a kind of sled mada by folding a plooo of ordinary note paper, and then loaded the sled with' various articles. Tho Insect proved able to draw. In addition to tho orig inal paper, twelvo paper sheets each 3 by 4 inches, a largo screw, two eteel pens, a stono weighing two ounccer and three and a half lead pen cils. When tho weight became too heavy to draw otherwise, the katydid got its foro feet over tho edge of the' tablo for a better bold, and on tho addition of another weight it incrcas-. ed tho adhering power of its feet by, moistening them in its mouth. Now, Sork Tribune. . .. ; .V-.-u ' . . J Where Bluebeard Uved. Most of our readers have beard of Bluebeard, the enterprising gentleman who made a hobby of marriago and had a way of bis own for getting rid of superfluous wives. Probably very few people, however, know that tho story has any sort of basis in fact Vet on the banks of tho world famous Bos porus near Constantinople there Is situated a picturesque oM medieval fortress known as "Bluebeard's cas tle" and which Is said to bavo been tho abodo of a terrible old pasha, whoso playful littlo ways gavo rise to tho story. Wido World Magazine. I.-" First Calculating Machine. Tho first calculating machine was invented and constructed by Blalso Pascal, a. Frenchman, in 1042, In which year ho was but nineteen years of ago. It was mado by him with the aid of ono workman and was present ed to tho chancellor of Franco. Dur ing the revolution It was found in a Junk sbop at Bordeaux and at present Is tho property of SL Bougouln of that city. All of tho four simple math ematical operations can bo mado with it Lauohtor. Laughter, while it lasts, slackens and unbraces tho mind, weakens tho faculties and causes a kind of remiss ness and dissolution in all the powers of tho soul, and thus far it may bo looked upon as a weakness In the com position of human nature. But If wo consider tho frotiuent reliefs wo ro cclvo from' it and how often It breaks ttw gloom which is apt to depress the mind and damp our spirits with tran sient unexpected gleams of Joy, ono would tako caro not to grow too wise for so great a pleasure of llfev Addison. II i' . ?Ji... r I HINTS FOR THi BUSY HOUSEWIFE Ironing Cabinet That Folds Into Small Space. Tho Iowa man who designed the Iron lng cabinet herewith shown arranged nn ordinary Ironing board with a sleeve Ironing board within it and two racks on which to hang the clothing and then I so contrived that the wholo niloir could be folded up. Tho cabinet, a flat one. stands against tho wall. Tho lov.-ei" J portion is a hinged door, and the I board slides into It in a vertical posi tion and Is conoealed. When in ute one end of the board rests on the top of the lower part of the cablnot and n pair of folding legs is straightened out and supports the other end. In the center of the large board is a sleeve ironing board pivoted on metal arms on which It can be raised several Inch es above the main board and used handily for Its special purpose. The racks also ore pivoted at the side of tho cabinet so that when they are not in use they can be pushed up toward the ceiling and will look like n couple of sticks there. To Hull Corn With Ashe Take one pint of good, clean wood ashes, put them in a cheesecloth bag and put in an iron or granite kettle that holds six or eight quarts of wa ter. Then pot In two or threo quarts of shelled corn, cover with water and boll until the hulls slip off the corn easily. You will have to try the com after boiling twenty minutes to half an hour, by taking out a spoonful and throwing it into cold water and rob bing It with your Angers. If the hulls or outside skin of the corn slips off easily, it has been cooked enough In tho lye. Now strain the water off tho corn and pour the corn into a largo dlshpan or tub and cover with cold water. Tako up tho oorn and rob be tween tho hands until It is free from hulls. Too win need to pat it through several waters. When the com is free from bolls put it on to cook in dear. cold water, which should bo changed several times whllo cooking to free It from the taste of lye. Cook until ten der. When it is almost done salt to taste and cook half an hour longer. Squabs on Toast These birds are a favorite dish for luncheon. They may be broiled. In which case they should bo split and cleaned and the wings and feet bent and skewered into place over the breast, or they may be drawn and seasoned with salt and butter inside and baked In a hot oven, first pinning a slice of fat salt pork over the breasts to baste them with. Cook about twen ty minutes and then arrange them on squares of hominy which have been browned delicately in hot butter. Gar nish with fried potatoes and serve plain lettuce dressed with French dressing at the some time on separate plates. If they a to bo broiled wrap them in buttered paper, each one by Itself, and by turning the edges over securely the Juices and fat may be kept inside and will baste the bird as it Is turned. The paper will not ignite unless it oreaKs ana some oi tne tat escapes. Gluten Bread For Diet. Mix together a pint each of sweet milk and lukewarm water, stir into it half a cake of compressed yeast bro ken fine and n dessertspoonful of melt ed butter. Lastly add enough gluten flour for a soft batter and sot to rise. When it has doubled the original bulk beat in an egg and, when this is well mixed with the sponge, enough gluten flour to enable yoa to knead It Into loaves. It must not bo stiff. Mold into small loaves and set for tho final ris ing. This is tho recipe recommended by a well known dietitian. Old Virginia Com Bread. Make about a quart of mush and whllo it is hot pour in half a gallon of cold water. Stir In meal enough to make rather a stiff dough and set where it will keep warm until it risen. Beforo baking put in half teaspoonful of soda nnd some salt. For breakfast bake on griddle In cakes, nave grid dle hot and well greased. If you wish to bake In pouo let it raise awhile in pan until light. Dressing For Fruit Salad. ' Put into a double boiler ono-half cupful of lemon Juico, ono-half cupful oforango Juice, a cupful of water, a cupful of sugar and throe eggs, beaten very light Cook until tho mixture be gins to thicken slightly, then take from tho flro and set aside to cool Sour Milk Biscuit Into two cupfuls of sour milk stir two teaspoonfuls of melted shortening and a teaspoonful of baking eoda dis solved in a tablespoonful of hot water. Stir In enough flour to mako a soft dough, roll out quickly, cut into rounds and bake in a quick oven. FOR THE CHILDREN Hoppy and Floppy. Next door there lives' a little boy With cheeks Just like a poppy. I do not know his truly name. And so I call him Hoppy. When mother calls him from his pUy Ho hops up In a minute; If Bhe has work for him to do He's eager to begin It If there's an errand to be run He hurries oft to do It. If there's a hard thing to bo done He hops his way right through it There also lives a little girl In this same house with Hoppy, And nor name, too, I do not know, But I have dubbed her Floppy. Does mother call, straightway she flop Down on a chair or sofa Or creeps Into a hiding place, Just like a littlo gopher. At sight of work sho flops right down Wherever she Is standing, "All tired out I" and only moves At mother's stern commanding. Now, which of these two children Would you youngBters like to copyf If you live In my neighborhood I hope It won't be Floppy. Sunday School Times. The Kingfisher. Tho kingfisher is tho greatest digger of our birds. Deep 'into a sand or clay bank ho digs until ho has built a tunrwJ six feet or more long. Ho then hollows out a littlo underground room nt tho end. in which hln mntn lays her eggs. The kingfisher is much larger than a robin a bandsomo bird. wim a Diuisn gray back, a crested head and a white breast with a gray band across It He is usually seen sitting on a tree or stump on tho edge of tho stream or lake where he gets his food. A ripple on tho surface of tho water shows a minnow swimming below, and down he dives, spearing it with his long, sharp bllL Then ha flioa back to his perch, shakes off the water and oats his catch' The Indian think tho kingfisher stocks their lakes wn nan. Tney say that when a king fisher finds a lake without fish ha catches one in another lake and drops it into the lake which has none. Magio Milk. It is not generally known to boys and girls that though Umewatcr is very clear and transparent as common spring water, if one chances to breathe or blow on it the liquid becomes as white as milk. The best way to try this experiment Is to put some pow dered quicklime Into a bottleful of cold water. Shake thoroughly at Intervals for a day. Allow the bottle to remain undisturbed for a day, when tho clear umewatcr may bo poured off from the sediment which will have gathered. Fin a wineglass or tumbler with tho limewnter and blow through the liquid with a piece of clean straw or a glass tube. In a few seconds the water win be to mod into milk. This is a very amusing experiment and its result la, of coarse, unerring. Geographical Names. "Smoky mountain," Mount Popocate petl; "Gate of Tears," Strait of Bab-el-Mendeb; -Great river," nio Grande; "Boat Destroyer," Amazon; "Foaming river," Ebro; "Valo of Paradise," Val paraiso; "Black mountain," Monte negro; "Long lake," Kennebec; "Tor toise Islands." Galapagos; "Snow Clad range," Sierra Nevada; "Mother of Waters," Chesapeake; "Father of Wa ters," Mississippi; "Lake of Abun dance," Mcmphremagog; "River of Joy," Guadlna; "Wind Blown Cloud' Wabash; "Mountain of Light" Llch tenfols; "Rich lake," Baikal; "Fruit ful mountain," Cerro Gordo: "Land of Dawn," Asia; "Swift Water," Tal lapoosa; "Prospect mountain," Monte video; "Cars Throat" Cattegat Phil adelphia Lodger. Half a Ton of Honey. Long ago, ICO years in fact a way- side tavern was built in Massachu setts. By and by some wild bees, look ing for a place to Bottle down In, swarmed into the garret Thero they lived and stored honey, and thero oth er hives set up housekeeping until there were fifty families. Tho peo ple downstairs did not bother them, and so tho boes lived happily and put aside honey for the rainy day that never came until a short time ago. Then the hotel was sold and torn down, nnd the wreckers found there was honey enough In tho garret to feed a wholo Sunday school. Tbero was 1,000 pounds of It Letter to the King. Flogging in the schools of Denmark was stopped bocauso of tho following letter, which King Christian found in his mail one morning: 'Dear King We nro four boys at Flakkebjerb school, and the master whips us every day with a piece of steel ropo be found in the arbor.' If bo doesn't stop there will bo a fire." Tho king visited the school, dis missed the teacher and bad the boys treated to cakes and chocolates at his expense. Then he warned all teach ers to avoid corporal punishment Bay ing that they must not make ruffians of the boys by ruffianly treatment Animal Thieves. There was found in the Tyrol, part of 'the Austrian empire, a swallow's nest lined with several banknotes, each worth $2. At about tho same time a butcher in Dornbirn found the nest that a mouse had mado out of ten banknotes, worth $4 each. These notes, unlike those used by tho swal lows, had been chowed to pieces, but tho butcher was able to redeem them at tho bank. Heaven. verb "heave" and means that which ! HUMOROUS QUIPS Piffle. There's a word that means a lot. That will often get your goat. It's a cynic's hottes! shot, That he hammers flown your throat. It's a nasty little word, But for withering It's a bird IMtne. When you'vo spouted all your soul In an effort to appear Wise and heavy, on the whole, And some chap begins to sneer Isn't It an awful shame That one word will gum your game7 Piffle. Oh, the Irony, the cutl Oil, tho way It makes you feel I Any star becomes a mutt At tho finish of his spiel When soma fellow speaks to say In a sharp, conclusive way Plflle. When you've read this little verse Tou'll perhaps bo wondering why It was writ, though quick and terse And with sickness In your eyo Tou will mutter, "What a. doltl" Then will come that awful Jolt Piffle. Baltimore Evening Sun. Cause For Economy. "A new hat my dear?" said Mr. Necdall. "I must say you don't seem to be following my suggestions of econ omy." "Ifs the first new hat I've had this six months!" answered his wife, snif fling. "Nonsense! What's wrong with your old ono?" "It's out of date," sho bridled. "And, after all, while I'vo been pinching and saving, what have you been doing, I'd like to know? You've been going to your cluto nnd music halls and smok ing your expensive cigars" "Of course, my darling," be inter rupted in a pained voice. "What else do you suppose I asked you to econo mlze for?" London Answers. The Little Boy. Tho littlo boy sat under a shade tree with his back against its trunk and tenderly rubbed his inflamed eye. "When I'm rich," said tho little boy, "I'll buy something nice for mother." He was a fairly good littlo boy and he didn't forget tho conventionalities. "But first" said tho little boy, "I'll build a big Jail a mile high an' 111 hlro a thousand p'licemcn an' 111 have a cell full o' rats, and then 111 put that red beaded little gink of a Bobby Moses In it fer blackin' my eye!" For In tho normal mlad of youth revenge is sweeter than love, Cleve land Plain Dealer. Rameelan Cramps. The learned editorial archaeologist of tho Ohio State Journal says that cucumbers were eaten by the Egyp tians in 1500 B. O. and probably aren't digested yet Come to think of it, ptomaine does suggest Ptolemy. Cleveland Plain Dealer. Worrlment. "The king of England seems to have a worried look," said tho man who was looking at the pictures. "I don't see what he has to worry about" replied Mrs. FUmgllfs hus band. "His wife doesn't play bridge." Washington Star. They Agree. "What is the secret of domestic hap piness?" "Making mutual concessions." "Mutual? Bah! My husband nnd I get along fine, and I make him make all the concessions." Toledo Blade. The Jaded One. Mr. X Oh, I've been doing quite a round of calls, and I've been so unfor tunate! i Mrs. T What! Everybody out? Mr. X No, everybody In! London Opinion. Twas Ever Thus. Patience And you say in the car you came uptown on thero were n lot of women hanging on to the straps? Patrice Yes, and a lot of men hang ing on to tho seats. Yonkers States man. The Tranquil Life. The Sago After forty years o mar ried life I've made up my mind it doesn't matter how often a man an bis wife disagrees, ns long as he don't let her know it Harper's' Magazine. Schedule Time. Hungry Traveler (at railway dining station) How soon will the train start, conductor? Conductor I'll start on time today. I ain't got much appetite. Soho. Worldwide. Miss Young In Turkey a woman doesn't know her husband till after she's married him. Mrs. Wedd Why mention Turkey especially? Boston Transcript. The Real Thing. Mrs. Gnaggs I'll never forget the night you proposed to me. You acted like a perfect fool. Mr. Gnaggs That wasn't acting. Philadelphia Record. S rived. He So Billy has told you that he saved mo from a watery grave? Sho Hm! ne told mo he'd saved you from a much worse place than that!-M. A. P. Self Evident. "Before we married you called me an angoL" "And I still do so. Are you not con tinually harping?"-Spokano Spokesman-Review. Grown Cautious. Chatty Lodger ito landlord) You seem to have seen a good deal. What are you? Landlord-Welt sir, 1 were a Hon tamer, and I'd bo thero now It I 'adn't a-marrled; but, you see. my wife were a knlie thrower in the same show, and sue got to practicing lier turn on me. Well, thinks 1. life ain't too long to run uo risks, so I took on u safe Job and become a steeplejack. London I'uni-h. A Word to Be Avoided. Wife Well, did you And out what It was .1 said that offended Mrs. Young bride? Hub- Yes. her husband told mo. It seems that you remarked. "I see you're Installed In your new home." and as they've furnished on the In stallment plan she thought you were trying to be funny at their expense. Boston Transcript. Quite a Help. "Is your boy Josh much of a help to you?" "Yes." replied Farmer Corntossel. "Ho is making a collection of insects. Of course he don't catch as many au he could If ho wouldn't stop to label 'em, but. then, you know, every little helps."-Washlngton Star. Anecdotes. "What Is an anecdote, pa?" "An anecdote, mv son. in n nhnrf and funny tale which at once reminds tho other fellow of n til which u neither short nor funny." Puck. Good Old Days, Sing me a song of the good old days, The days when men could mix, Could laugh and Joke and go their ways And not talk politics. Denver Post. Sing mo a song of the good old days. The days when dames could chat And not devote each word and phrase To gown and wrap and hat Cleveland Plain Dealer. LONG POND NOW OPEN UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT; FISHING, BOATING, HUNTING FIRST-CLASS BOARD. LAKE JAMES HOTEL Lakeville, Wayne Co., Pa. W. C. SPRY AUCTIONEER HOLDS SALES ANYWHERE IN STATE. Tho Kind You Havo Always Bought, nnd which has been in use for over SO years, has borno the signatnro of - and has been mado under his per L&L jCJ&Jty'y''2! sonal supervision since its infancy, C7r, '-eucA4Z Allow no ono to deceive you in this. All Counterfeits, Imitations and" Just-as-good" are but Experiments that trifle with and endanger the health oJT Infants and Children Experience ngainst Experiment What is CASTORIA Castoria is a harmless substitute for Castor Oil, Faro gorlc, Drops and Soothing Syrups. It is Pleasant. It contains neither Opium, Morphine nor other Narcotic substance. Its ago is its guarantee. It destroys Worms and allays Fevcrislincss. It cures Diarrhoea and Wind CoUc. It relieves Teething Troubles, cures Constipation and Flatulency. It assimilates tho Food, regulates tho Stomach and Bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep. Tho Children's Panacea Tho Mother's Friend. GENUINE CASTORIA ALWAYS Bears tho The Kind You Have Always Bought In Use For Over 30 Years. TM OtHTlUR COMPANY, TT HUH MY aTMCr, NCW TOKK CITY. ro r REISULTS JOSEPH N. WELCH Fire Insurance The OLDEST Fire Insurance Agency in Wayne County. Office: Second floor Masonic Build ing, over C. 0. Jadwin's drug store, Honsdale. M. LEE BRAMAN EVERYTHING IN LIVERY Buss for Every Train and TownXalls. Horses always for sale Boarding and Accomodations for Farmers Prompt and polite attention at all times. ALLEN HOUSE BARN MARTIN CAUFIELD Designer and Man ufacturer of ARTISTIC MEMORIALS Office and Works 1036 MAIN ST. HONESDALE, PA. Wo print bill beads. Wo print pamphlets, Signature of KRAFT & CONGER Represent Reliable Companies ONLY I IliilllliiH III HONESDALE, PA. ADVERTISE IN THE CITIZEN u neavea or raised up.