TIIB CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JUNE 7, 1011.
PAGE T
Table Rules For Utile Folks.
In silence I must take my seat
And give God thunUs bcfoiv I cat.
Must for my food In patience wait
Till 1 am asked to hand my plate.
I must not scold nor whlno nor pout
Nor move my chair or plate about.
With knife or fork or anything
I must not play, nor must I sins.
I must not speak a useless word,
For children should be seen, not heard.
I must not talk about my food
Nor fret If I don't think It good.
I must not say, "The bread Is old.
The tea Is hot, tho coffee's cold."
I must not cry for this or that
Nor murmur If my meat Is fat.
My mouth with food I must not crowd
Nor while I'm eating epoak aloud.
Must turn my head to cough or sneeze
And when I nsk say, "If you please."
The tablecloth I must not spoil
Nor with my food my fingers boII,
Must keep ray seat when I have done
Nor round the table sport or run.
When told to rise then I must put
My chair away with noiseless foot
And lift my heart to God above
In praise for all his wondrous lovo.
A Brave Mother Rat.
A cat that lives at one of tbc police
stations In New York city went nosing
about In tho baseinont and found n
neat full of baby rats. She utarted In
to cat. them, but the mother rat came
out of the dork and jumped at the In
truder. There was n little Dsht. and
then the cat backed out. She went
upstairs and got another cat, nnd the
two went down to the basement. It
needed more than two cats, though.
The rat beat off both her enemies and
followed them upstairs and out Into the
street. Somebody set a dog Into the
fight, but the dog got tired after he
had been bitten a few times, and he
gave up tho fight, like the cats. The
rat wns victorious, but she had been
hurt so much In the battle that a po
liceman shot her to put her out of
pain, and then the baby rats, of
course, had to be drowned.
The Bluebird.
There Is an old Indian legend that
the bluebird was a piece of tho sUv
which came down to live on earth.
It surely looks as If this were true,
for his head, back, wings and tall
have the lovely blue color of the
spring sky on a sunny day. Though
ho Is now really a bird of tho earth,
the bluebird seems to enjoy getting
back as near the sky as he can, and
we often hear his call come floating
down when he is so far above as to
bo out of sight.
Tho bluebird is not entirely blue.
Indeed, be is said to be the most pa
triotic of birds, for his colors are red,
white and blue. With tho blue nbove
and with a red breast and white un
derneath, the little fellow surely
seems to be doing his best to display
our nation's colors. The soft warble
of the bluebird is ono of the most de
lightful signs of spring.
Glass Sandpaper.
"There Is no sand In sandpaper,"
said the manufacturer. "It is a pow
dered glass that does the business.
That's where tho broken bottles go."
Ho nodded toward a pile of broken
bottles in the yard. "Wo powdor the
glass Into half a dozen different
grades," ho said. "We coat our paper
with an even layer of hot glue. TJhen,
without loss of time, wo spread over
the glass powder. Finally wo run a
wooden roller lightly over tho sheets
to give them a good surface. When,
In the past, sandpaper was made of
eand it wouldn't do a quarter of the
work glass paper does."
Conundrums.
Why Is a baby like wheat? Be
cause it Is first cradled, then thrashed
and finally becomes the flower of the
family.
What is that which is sometimes
with a head, without a head, with a
tail and without a tall? A wig.
"When are tailors and houso agents
both in the same business? When
they gather the rents.
Why are tho tallest peopla tho lazi
est? Because they are always longer
in bed than others.
What class of women are apt to
give tone to society? Tho belles
(bells).
The French Scholars.
According to a recent college profes
sor, three French boys were studying
"Hamlet," and their task was to ren
der tho sollloqny "To bo or not to be"
from French Into English.
This is what tho professor read on
tho three respective papers:
"To was or not to am."
"To were or is to not"
"To should or not to will."
Now you, my friends who study
French, can say to them "It serves you
right"
About the Sloth.
A sloth will feed on tho leaves, buds
and young shoots of a single tree
without onco descending from the
branches, so long as food lasts, though
sometimes It will pass from ono tree
to another if It can do so without go
ing to the ground. Instead of walk
ing on the branches it swings beneath
them with Its back downward. Its
coarse, shaggy hair looks like grass
withered In tho sun and gives it such
an appearanco that it cannot bo readi
ly seen except when in motion.
The Civil War.
The dates officially recognized as the
beginning and tho end of tho cMl'war
aro Jan. 9, 1801, when tho United
States stemshlp Star of tho West was
fired on by state troops in Charleston
harbor, and 'April 3, 1800. when the
president proclaimed the rebellion at
nn end.
TIMELY
There arc about 100 varieties of
flesh eating plants known.
Java's new coffee crop Is eRticiutcil
at over 4.000.000 poumR
Bauauas and potatoes ure very much
alike In chemical composition.
Juvenile smoking Is said to have In
creased rapidly abroad In the last few
years.
There are now about 1,250,000 more
females than males in England and
Wales.
Tho United States, Germany and
England last year turned out four
fifths of the world's new pig Iron.
Jewish immigrants are steadily flow
ing into Palestine, nnd in their ancient
capital, Jerusalem, there are now no
fewer than 00,000 Jews.
Something like one in every five of
Great Britain's population Is n depos
itor In the postofllco savings bunk, the
average deposit being about $75.
Deposits of sulphur in commercial
quantities have been found In Lower
California within fifty miles of the In
ternational boundary at Caloxlco.
Chinese Jade Is so successfully Imi
tated by German manufacturers that
experts of tho far east frequently mis
take tho nrtlflclal for tho genuine.
In Germany there has been patented
a machine for grinding steel balls
which is claimed to retain a ball with
in it until It is perfectly formed and
sized.
In France a process is being devel
oped by which the fur Is removed from
a skin and placed on nn artificial base,
nnd then the skin Is utilized sepa
rately. There arc more than seventeen miles
of electric wires in a network that
forms a burglar alarm surrounding the
new money vault in the treasury at
Washington.
It Is suggested that tho Chinese bus
tard be domesticated in America. It
weighs from fourteen to eighteen
pounds, and the meat Is said to be
very well flavored.
Plumage, skins or etrgs of native
birds of Australia and New Guinea
can no longer bo exported, this having
been prohibited by the Australian com
monwealth government.
At Bnllnrnt, Australia, lias neon
found a nugget of gold weighing n lit
tle less than thirty pounds, and ex
perts say it will turn out at least fif
teen pounds of pure gold.
Flreboats owned by several of rhe
larger cities are now supplied with
masts to elevate tho discharge noz
zles, on the same principle that water
towers aro used by land firemen.
Having been tossed about by tho sea
for more than eleven years, a life pre
server from the steamer Portland
wrecked in 1898, was recently picked
up lu n fair stato of preservation.
In Denmark there has been discov
ered a deposit of clay from which
may be made bricks that are light in
weight, yet so tough that nails may In
driven into them without crack'ng
them.
Foreign ships have all the coal trade
between Philadelphia, Baltimore.
Hampton Roads nnd the Patiamj
canal zone, Tamplco nnd Vera Cruz,
about 700,000 tons n year. They brinjr
back Cuban ore.
Tho foreign tourists who visited Ja
pan during the last year totaled 17.
283, including 3,101 Englishmen, 3.S70
Americans nnd 0,730 Chinese. This
shows an increase of some 200 as com
pared with the preceding year.
The United States leads the world a
nn exporter of tobacco, having sup
plied over $41,000,000 worth of tobne
co and manufactures of tobacco which
entered international markets last
year. In the .exportation of manufac
tured tobacco Cuba is at tho head of
the list.
London doctors Interested in tho nn
trltlvo value of foodstuffs have Issued
a document in which they recommend
tho use of whole meal in making bre:i'
Instead of fine white flour. It Is main
talned that there are in the whole inea.
two and one-half times the amount of
mineral substances that nourish the
body.
The department of agriculture has
proved through experimentation that
iflCO worth of denatured alcohol can
be produced per acre from the fruit of
four years' growth of the cacti (tunas).
This means that a quarter section of
now arid land can be made to yield a
gross Income of $21,000 almost perpet
ually. Eugen Sandow, whose feats of
strength and system of bodily training
havo long made his name familiar, has
been appointed professor of scientific
physical culture to King Georgo of
England. For twenty years Sandow
has been England's foremost advocate
of physical training. He is a man of
considerable wealth.
Lotteries nre operated In nil impor
tant towns and cities of tho Dominican
Republic. In many of tho larger cities
there aro from two to five, practically
all under municipal supervision. Sev
enty per cent must be given in prizes,
5 per cent goes for streets and roads,
and the rest, less expenses, is divided
among the public hospitals, schools,
flro departments nnd charities.
English newspapers tell of an organ
ization of 200 farmers of Hawarden
to revive tho ancient water wheel
gristmills in their vicinity and grind
there all the wheat reserved for their
own uso. Numbers of old country
mills aro clsewhero being put to a
similar use. It is declared that the
flour thus produced Is "nutritious nnd
fragrant beyond any other in the
A
peach mmw
Unusual Gi.'i Softens an Ob
durate Father.
You know pa wouldn't censent to
Del's marrlago with Jim. wouldn't al
low the wedding at the house or allow
either Del or Jim to come here after
ward. This was because Jim had
been wild and hadn't settled down. It
wns hard on us all, for Del was my
only child, sho had always been her
father's pet, and his treatment almost
broke her heart.
Tho years went by. and pa Instead
of softening appeared to harden,
though Jim made Del a splendid hus
band and grew rich. They had one
child, a boy. the prettiest little chap
you ever saw. Ono duy an artist Mtr.v
him In his bath nnd was so struck
with his little form that he naked
leave to copy him Into a picture he
was painting. Tho picture was a suc
cess and brought tho artist a flue ref
utation, all on account, everybody
said, of tho Uttlo figure in tho cornel-.
Ono day Del said to me, "Ma. Vtu
going to send pa a present.'
"I'm nfrald, my dear, he'll send I;
right back to you."
"Maybe he will, and maybe lie
won't. Anyway, I'm going to try It.
I'm going to put it in the dining room
so that he'll see It when he comer
down tho first thing In the morning."
"now are you going to send it?"
"Jim and I are going to get up ear
ly nnd take it round. You are to let
us in. We'll place It right where pa
will see it the first thing when lis
comes Into the breakfast room."
I didn't believe It would do any
good, but I told Del 1 would help ih-f
in any way I could, so It wns all ar
ranged that they should bring tlie.r
gift tho next Sunday morning. n
that day wo breakfast at 0 o'clock, nr.U
pa does not have to go downtown to
business. When Sunday came the sun
was shining bright nud beautiful, the
birds were singing In the yard, and
there was a delicious freshness in the
air. I was thankful, thinking that if
anything could put pa In a good humor
It would be this beautiful morning. A
Uttlo before 9 Jim nnd Del drove up
to the side gate, which was hidden
from tho house by trees, though that
wasn't necessary, for pa was shut up
in his shaving room, where ho couldn't
seo nnythlng, and Jim carried an ob
long box about three feet in length up
to the side entrance. I let them In,
nnd they went to the dining room,
while I went upstairs to keep nn eye
on pa.
"What a pleasant day," I said, "for
a family party to go for a drive In the
country!"
"There's no family party except you
and me." he said.
I know that he was pining for Del.
but I didn't sny anything more for
fear of making him ugly. I saw by
the clock that It was five minutes to 0,
and I went to the banister and cough
ed to give Jim nnd Del warning, then
told pa that breakfast was ready. He
got up with a sigh, and we went down
stairs together.
We both stood mute looking nt what
we saw In the bay window at the end
of tho dining room. Tho marble bust
that always stood on tho pedestal had
been removed, nnd in its stead was
the statue of a little boy about five
years old. It was of white marble
that Is, so far as we could judge and
held out a pair of little arms to us.
"Great guns!" pa exclaimed.
"Little darling!" said I. "What a
pity it isn't alive!"
"How do. grandpa?" cried the stntue,
and, tearing off its white face, it dis
played tho rosy features of Del's little
Jim. Jumping off tho pedestal, all lu
his white tights, ho ran up to his
grandpa, who bent down and took hlra
in his arms.
I never saw pa so overcome In my
life. Ho hugged the boy so tight that
I thought ho would crush him. Then
Del camo from the pantry and put her
arms around them both. Del was
laughing and crying, and pa was try
ing to keep from doing both. Then ho
put little Jim down, and without no
ticing that his clothes were covered
with the white powder that had made
tho boy's tights look like marble ho
folded Del in his arms.
Jim big Jim, I mean seeing through
a crack In" the pantry door that the
plnn had been a success, came Into the
room, nnd pa put out his hand.
That was the happiest breakfast par
ty any of us ever sat down to. I had
taken pains to havo a nlco breakfast,
though I didn't believe Del's present
to her father would break through his
crustiness, but hoped that It would
and wo would all take our Sunday
morning meal together. After the
breakfast we sat In the library and
talked while pa and Jim smoked.
"Ma," said pa to me. "didn't you say
something about a family party going
for a drive? I reckon we'll have out
tho horses."
Pa nnd Jim went out to the stable,
while Del and I got up a lunch. Then
wo started for tho country. Tbero
was room for Jim and Del on tho back
seat while pa had little Jim with him
In front
Who got up tho statue? Why, tho
artist who used Uttlo Jim for a model.
After tho reputation and money he
made out of his plcturo he couldn't do
enough for Jim and Del and exercised
all bis skill on the boy's makeup and
tn posing him.
I uiiRannnR!io rag si no
i
nu Man Who Kicks. I
IhllArri IrtflV fAtl Ifnil ,V.t an ..... I
Philosophers may tell you that an ever-
1 Is bolter than a mixture, half and half.
I Of smiles and frowns used alternated
every little while
I And that the world will love you If you
laugh,
' But I have often noticed that the man
I who's always kind
I And smiles, no matter how hard he's
! been hit.
Bets what the kickers wouldn't take, and
you will always find
The man who kicks some gets the best
of It.
I'vo seen It In my dally walks through
life, and, while I know
That frowns bring favors sometimes
when a smile
Would fall, I try to smile a little every
where I go
And often miss the best things by a
mile.
I've seen it In the hotels as I waited for
my meals
While kickers came and almost had a tit
That made all hands step lively, and It's
so In other deals
Tho man who kicks some gets the best
of It.
Tho man who smiles continually and nev
er makes a kick
Will bo Imposed upon and often sold,
For merchants like to sell their goods and
always turn the trick
Of passing out what's damaged or la old
To one who does not raise a howl and
kick for something now,
Although tho things they sell to him do
not fit.
I like the smiling method best, but still I
know 'tis true
Tho man who kicks some gets tho best
of It.
Charles H. Meters tn Puck.
Poor Dog,
So often wo call a man a dog when
wo wish to reproach him.
And yet a dog
Doesn't lie,
Doesn't swear,
Doesn't cheat.
Doesn't drink,
Doesu't smoke,
Doesn't swindle.
i Doesn't flirt,
' Doesn't borrow.
Doesn't pretend
And wouldn't even resent it if you
called it a man. Life. '
Took His Nerve.
"It's up to me to get a new gag. I
told dat lady In do cottage dat I used
to travel wld a circus."
"I suppose she got off dat old chest
nut by giving yer an ar and asking
yer to do do" split?"
"No; she had a new one. She gave
me a saw nnd told mo to saw up a
cord of wood and den de resh saw
dust would remind me of de circus
rings." St Louis Globe-Democrat.
The Evidence.
"Say, Bunkerton, Tom Billups has
applied for a position in our bank,
and I'm looking up his general record,"
said Dobblelgh. "Can you tell me if
he er If he is a man of domestic
habits?"
"Why, yes, I guess so," returned
Bunkerton "that is, judging from the
cigars he smokes his tastes are entire
ly that way." Harper's Weekly.
A Much Needed Boon.
"I am working on an Invention that
will, I think, be the greatest boon
mankind could have."
"Will it reduce tho cost of living?"
"No, but it will make it Impossible
for people In other parts of tho house
to hear thoso in tho boxes talking
while operatic performances are going
on." Chicago Record-Herald.
A Fright.
'Tes," said Miss Knox, "I saw her
in that now gown of hors, and she real
ly behaved as if sho was happy.'
"Well?" queried Miss Ascum.
"Well, it's remarkable how happy
some people can be no matter how
they look." Catholic Standard and
Times.
The Result.
"I suppose those garden seeds I sent
saved you quite a Uttle money," said
the affable statesman.
"No," replied Mr. Qrowcher. "I
hadn't the heart to waste 'em, and tho
result is that I'm in debt for garden
Implements." Washington Star.
His Contrary Methods.
"If a successful perfumo manufac
turer were to become director of the
mint he would revolutionize its methods,-
wouldn't he?"
"How so?"
"Because he coins dollars by making
scenta." Baltlmoro American.
Unusual.
Sho What aro you laughing at?
He Your hat.
"Oh, dearl Haven't I got it on
straight?"
"Yes; that's why I'm laughing. It
looks funny on straight" Yonkers
Statesman.
Fixing the Record.
Clergyman (taking friend round poor
parish) Yea, a nervous Uttle fellow.
I remember his father was highly
etrung.
Woman Ye remember wrong then.
'H got orf wlv ten years! Punch.
Selfish Girl.
The Widow Everybody says my
daughter got her beauty from me.
What do you think about it?
Old Bachelor WcU, sho certainly
had a lot of nerve to take all of it
Chicago News.
No Use For It Then.
"Do you save tip money for a rainy
day, dear?"
"Oh. no! I never shop when It
rains." Browning's Magazine.
j REPORT OF THE CONDITION OF THE
Farmers and Me
ChaiRCS BaUk,
'
OF HONESDALE. WAYNE COUNTY. PA
at the close ot business. April 29. 1911.
RESOURCES.
Reserve fund $
Cash, specie and notes, 113,469 33
Due from approved re-
, serve anenfs $10,007 4953,636 87
Nickels, cents and fractional
currency 315 24
Checks and other cash Items 3,211 CO
Duo from hanks and trust com
panies not reserve
ltllls discounted, 85.949 53
Time loans with collateral 22.831 00
Loans on call with collateral 23.031 35
Loans on call upon two or more
r names 34,872 00
Loans secured by bonds and mort
gages..... 14,460 00
Investment securities owned exclu
sive of reserve bonds, viz
Stocks, bonds, etc $50,077 91
Mortgages and Judg-
nm ments of record 50.571 GO-IOO.GW 61
Offlce llulldlnc and Lot 18.KI9 65
Furniture and fixtures 1,804 41
$ 364.619 17
LIABILITIES.
Capital Stock paid In $ 75,000 00
Surplus Fund 10,000 00
Undivided Profits, less expenses
and taxes paid 7.118 49
Deposits, subject to check $57,757 93
Cashier's checks outstand'g 70U O.i
Deposits, special 214,012 75-272,500 03
$304,619 17
State of Pennsylvania, County ot Wayne, ss
I, C. A. Emery, Cashier of tho above named
company, do solemnly swear that the above
statement Is true to the best of my knowledzo
and belief,
C, A. EMERY. Cashier.
Subscribed andswornto before me this 5th
day of May 1911.
, , Rena S. Edqett. N. P.
Correct attest:
M. E. Simons. 1
John E. Krantz, -Directors.
J. S. Brown. I 37w6
Wo print circulars.
Wo print bill heads,
THE NORTHWESTERN MUTUAL LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY
OF MILWAUKEE, WIS.
., ...Agency at Honesdale, Wayne Co., Pa.
A , , , , FROM THE 53d ANNUAL REPORT.
Total admitted assets t 273,813,063.53
Total Insurance In force l,0S0,239,70S.OO
Total number policy-holders 423,481.00
New Insurance Reported and paid for In 1910 118,789,033.00
Increase In Insurance In force over 1909 67,240,613.00
Total Income for 1910 Bi.979,892.23
Total payment to policy-holders 82,S69,899.00
Ratio of expense and taxes to Income 12.78 per cent.
YOU WILL MAKE NO MISTAKE IF YOU INSURE WITH
II. A. TINGLEY, Agent,
HONESDALE, PA.
NEW FOR
- - AT - -
MENNER & COMPANY STORES
i r
Our long Traveling
Pretty in Shades and
ifl
I lilt I H
enner&Co. New Offerings.
D. & H. CO. TlflE TABLE
A.M.
SUN
A.M.
A.M.
A.M.
P.M,
8 30
10 00
10 00
10 00
4 30
6 05
Albany ....
. lilnshamton .
A.M.
10 00
2 15
12 30
2 15
. Philadelphia .
8 15
7 25
815
$4 40
5 30
1 30
2 18
7 10
7 65
.Wllkes-Barre.,
....Scranton....
4 03
P.M.
A.M.
P.M.
P.M.
A.M.
Lv
6 40
S 60
9 03
9 15
9 19
9 36
9 42
9 48
6 20
2 05
2 15
2 19
2 37
2 43
2 49
2 62
2 67
2 69
3 03
3 07
3 10
3 15
8 45
8 65
8 69
9 18
....Carbondale.,..
..Lincoln Avenue..
Whites.,
Farvlew
Canaan
... LakeLodore ...
... . Way mart
Keene
Bteene
Prorapton.....
Fortenta
Reelyvllle
.... Honesdale ....
6 30
Sol
6 31
6 62
6 11
B 17
6 68
9 21
623
626
632
635
639
6 43
K 46
6 00
7 01
7 071
7 13
9 29
9 32
51
9 67
10 00
9 3
7 16
9 39
9 43
9 47
9 60
B 65
10 01
7 20
7 24
7 27
10 08
10 11
10 15
7 31
P.4L"
P.M.
A.M. ...
P.M.
A.M.
Ar
FOR
RESULTS
Roll of
HONOR
Attention is called to the STRENGTH
of the
Wayne County
The FINANCIER of New York
City has published a ROLL Or
HONOR of the 11,470 State Banks
and Trust Companies of United
States. In this list the WAYNE
COUNTY SAVINGS BANK
Stands 38th in tho United States
Stands 10th in Pennsylvania.
Stands FIRST in Wayne County.
Capital, Surplus, $52,342.88
Total ASSETS, $2,951,048.26
Honesdale, Pa., December 1, 1910.
We print programs,
Wo print envelopes,
AVe print legal blanks,
SPRING
Ssvings
Bank
LATEST
CUTS
and
STYLES
k
CLOTHS
and Walking Coats are
Styles.
HONESDALE BRANCH
P.M.I
A.M.
I. M,
SUN
10 50
9 00
A.M.
SUN
2 00
2 40
10 60
8 45
12 0
7
2 51
i! 13
738
iV.M
P.M
S 33
7 25
6 30
2 25
1 35
8 35
9 12
8 60
Ar
A.M.
P.M.
P.M.
P.M,
P.M.
8 29
8 17
8 13
7 51
7 47
7 41
7 39
7 32
8 05
7 61
7 60
7 33
7 25
7 19
7 17
7 12
7 09
7 05
1 35
1 25
5 40
5 30
12 17
12 07
12 03
1 21
5 21
1 03
12 66
5 08
11 41
5 01
11 37
VI nl
5 66
11 31
12 49
12 43
12 40
12 36
12 32
12 29
12 25
4 64
11 29
11 23
11 20
4 48
4 45
7 30
726
7 22
7 19
7 IS
4 41
11 lffl
7 01
4 37
11 12
11 09
11 05
6 6S
6 65
4 34
4 40
Lv
A.M.
P.M. P.M
A.M. P.M
ADVERTISE IN THE CITIZEN